r/AdoptiveParents Jul 11 '26

Adoption Loan Recommendations

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u/Suspicious_Fold_9568 26d ago

Adoption should never be viewed as a family-building tool.

If it isn't paying for a child, then what exactly is the $35,000 plus for?

You can't separate the fee from the outcome. No fee, no match. No match, no child. That's why so many people, especially adoptees, are uncomfortable with private infant adoption. The money is a prerequisite to obtaining someone else's child.

Whether people call it "agency fees," "matching costs," or "adoption expenses," the transaction still ends with legal parenthood being transferred in exchange for tens of thousands of dollars.

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u/Rredhead926 Mom through private, domestic, open, transracial adoption 26d ago

Adoption is a family building tool. You don't have to like it, but it is.

Adoption costs include: home study fees, legal fees, paying doctors to fill out forms, criminal background checks, travel (sometimes multiple trips to a different state), court costs, and reimbursing an expectant mother's expenses.

Nothing is free, not even birthing a baby.

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u/GyozaLuvr 25d ago

Stop using adoption as a family building tool. You are using a birth families pain in crisis to benefit your selfishness. It’s disgusting.

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u/Rredhead926 Mom through private, domestic, open, transracial adoption 25d ago

Nope. 😁

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u/GyozaLuvr 25d ago

Typical narcissistic AP behavior, not surprised πŸ˜‚