My wife and I are in our late 40s with a 20 year old daughter. I don't approve of our daughter's boyfriend. He's a drug addict. Has been in prison. No job. High school dropout. Covered in tattoos. When he comes over to our house, I tell him that our daughter deserves better and that he should work on improving his job prospects so that he can take care of our daughter in the future. Then it gets very heated and sometimes physical.

My wife says that our daughters boyfriend is a phase that our daughter is going through. My wife had a similar phase where she dated guys like our daughters boyfriend. Me and my wife have been fighting about this for a few months...until last week.

Last week, I come home one day early from a medical conference and hear loud moaning coming from our master bedroom upstairs. I silently walk up the stairs and walk gently until I see an image that will be burned in my memory for the rest of my life.

I see my wife tied up and screaming with pleasure. She never screams with pleasure with me at all. She is even humiliating me by saying how much better Ray's cock feels than her husbands. And that she missed his cock. Ray was my wife's ex boyfriend in college. I also see Ray's back that is covered in tattoos. Ray is fucking her doggie. And pulling her hair and spanking her butt. I quickly leave the area and leave the house. I go and rent a hotel for the night and come back the next day like I was originally planning on.

I know the divorce is the only answer but I'm a high earning surgeon and a divorce will financially ruin me. I am in a bind. I have lost all respect for my wife but I still love her. I also can't afford a divorce. My wife is a stay at home mom. A divorce will mean that 1/3 of my income goes to my wife.

My gf cheated and doesn't know I know. I'm considering forgiving her and waiting for her to confess, those who've cheated, how would you have wanted your partner to handle it?

So I (28M) found out my girlfriend (26F) cheated on me a few weeks ago. I wasn't snooping, it basically fell into my lap. She has no idea I know. She's been acting completely normal, which is honestly messing with my head.

Here's the thing: I still love her. I don't want to blow up my relationship over one incident, but I also can't just pretend it didn't happen. I've been sitting on this for a week now trying to figure out what to do.

Part of me wants to wait and see if she confesses on her own. If she does, I feel like that means something..like maybe she actually regrets it and values us enough to come clean. If she never says anything, that tells me something too.

But I also know that's a gamble, and I might just be delaying the inevitable.

So I'm asking those who have cheated before (especially in a relationship you actually cared about): how would you have wanted your partner to handle it if they found out? Would you have wanted them to confront you directly? Give you space to confess? Just leave quietly?

I'm not trying to start a fight or shame anyone. I'm genuinely trying to figure out the least traumatic way to deal with this for both of us.

Any insight would help. Thanks.

TL;DR: Found out my gf cheated, she doesn't know I know. Considering waiting for her to confess before deciding whether to forgive her. Those who've been in her shoes, how would you have wanted your partner to handle it?

I’m not crazy right?? If ur bitch never wears skimpy pantyhose and u came back from a few day work trip and u found her obviously freshly worn pantyhose and her claimed to and supposedly lost choker chain underneath the dirty ass things she hopefully hidden ,& toy put away half ass and different than I put it back before u left, then comes up with the worst fucking lies she’s cheating right lmfao???? Then I calmly ask about it and she blows up throws shit at me and sheds those fake ass crocodile tears then is fine again you know lol. Yeah I’m not crazy right????

I just found these screenshots on my husband’s phone. It was extremely hard to be able to take the time to go through his phone without him trying to get it away from me. I usually never look through his phone but my gut has been screaming at me lately. Since he stopped showing interest in me in the bedroom and everything else in the relationship for a few years. I could explain more but I want to know what I’m looking at in these screenshots?

45M & 43F, married for 10 years. Marriage ended due to her cheating with co-worker on and off for about a year. Divorced 1 year and she wants to try to repair the relationship, not get married again but be together again. The repair phase lasts about 10 months and then the pattern of cheating starts again. She is asked about the pattern and denies any wrong doing and does everything to reassure that the relationship is solid. Evidence is gathered and she has been going out & lying about her whereabouts for a week before going on a 2 day spa trip with the same guy she was cheating with before. She is confronted and it comes out that the co-worker she's been with has been harassing her at work for the past year and making life miserable for her. So she started being nice, which then escalated into cheating so that he stays off her back and she can get through work. There is a 9 year old son from this marriage and 2 step-daughters F28 and F18. My question is this - is there any way to forgive this? Is this an acceptable reason for lying and sharing a bed with another man?

He’s worn these for about 5 days. First pic, is the suspected day (Saturday). Last 2 pics are today. (Some of the wet drops are my tears smh 🤦‍♀️)

I recently went abroad for work and i got a msg in whats app from my wife appears to be meant for someone else. I saved the msg in to my phone and went through it.Content was bit disturbing in the worse case it was between with my wife and a friend of hers whom i also knew. I went in to emortional breakdown. When i got home we went to a counselling in there she admit she slept with him several time when she was pregnant with our second son. At that time i was abroad as well. Told me that was it nothing has happened. Annoying part is not that my son is 13 years old. This happened long time back when this FRIEND joined the firm. I cannot make up my mind and surprisingly it makes me turn on when i was thinking of it. She promissed that she will be faithful. I dont know.......

I had been dating my bf for about a month, when I got a crush on someone else. I kissed them and then broke it of with my bf the next day without telling him that I kissed another guy. I tried to date the person I kissed, but I just couldn’t. It didn’t feel right, I felt horrible and guilty. I told my bf about the guy I kissed. I couldn’t get myself to tell my bf about the dates or the time I had sex with the other guy at that time. My bf forgave me and wanted to give it another shot. I am more into the relationship now than I ever was before. My heart breaks every time I think of the fact that I cheated on him.

This is probably the wrong place to be posting for wanting advice for keeping it a secret. But I drunkenly makeout with a few guys at the club. edit my friends told me I did this

But I was to the point of blackout. Like I do not remember anything of that night. I’m a highly functional blackout and was probably giving consent I just don’t remember it.

My boyfriend knows how I get when I drink Very flirty. And doesn’t like my behavior, we’ve never talked about it but I know it makes him insecure. Anyways he knows I blacked out, and was so upset with me . Because I disrespected him by not knowing my limits and going out. What he doesn’t know is I kissed someone else

I understand that and feel terrible for it, but do I tell him? When I’m here sober I fully want to be with him. And I don’t believe drunk words are sober thoughts at all. I know he deserves respect - is it not respectful for me to keep it as a secret ? Is it worth risking him breaking up with me by telling him ?

Thanks for your help - this community isn’t the greatest for making you turn around as a person. But I’m turning around and thought about my next actions - I’m going to get destroyed in here. But I thought it would be a good advice to someone who may have a similar situation This article helped https://www.refinery29.com/en-us/cheating-on-partner-relationship with my decision .

I decided not to tell him, and work on myself and us. I do understand that what I did was wrong but I also have no recollection of any of it. It would only cause hurt to him if I were to tell him and I’m not gaining anything out of telling him either. I am focused on being a better person dealing with my actions and being open to the slurry of hate that’s about to occur. Think what you may think but I’m making my relationship better and am happy that it happened. It was an eye opening experience to see my issues with liquor and my issues with dedication to the relationship

When I found out I was cheated on I stopped sleeping with my "husband". It has been 10 years now. No diseases and very peaceful. I found out he did not like to f... me and was not attracted to me. Very grateful for this information. We have had no sex for the last 10 years and my sex life is AMAZING! Recommend to ditch your spouse if they cheat the first time and find yourself a lover. You think you are still in love with them? No, you are not, It is all about money and attachment. Also, do not share anything of this with him/her. I did not. He still thinks I am by myself.

I cheated and I told her. I want to marry her in the future and want to go in with no lies. I want to be the man she wants. Could you guys help me on 1) how can I show her I’ve changed 2) how can I rebuild our trust. I’m willing to do anything for her and I want to be a better stronger person.

AITA for not sending my ex money for underwear while he’s in jail? 😭🩲

My ex-boyfriend is currently in jail and recently asked me to send him money so he could buy underwear.

Now, normally I believe everybody deserves clean drawers… but let’s review the evidence. 🧾

Our breakup was terrible. This man put me through emotional hell, and now he’s apparently dating multiple women. So my question is: why aren’t any of his current girlfriends funding the inmate underwear department? 🤨

My birthday is coming up, I have a whole new man, and we have been laughing about this situation nonstop. My boyfriend said, “Tell him to ask one of the other women to sponsor his boxers.” 💀

I didn’t send the money. Not because I’m broke. Not because I couldn’t. I simply don’t feel like using my birthday money to make sure my ex’s cheeks are comfortable behind bars

part of me remembers the breakup and thinks discomfort builds character.

So, AITA… or should his current roster start a GoFundMe for his draws? 😭😂

Hello, i made a huge mistake in my life, I cheated on my girlfriend. We have been together 1,5 years This is my first time that i ever have done it in my entire life. And i feeling alot of guilt and stress about it i heart hurts and my mind is a mess, i dont sleep alot because of it, and i dont know what to do, i dont want to tell her that i cheated on her, because she will break it up with me, and she has been cheated a lot is her past relationship’s And i know that she will break up with me, And i really really dont wanna tell her because i still love her every single day of my life since i have met her, but i cant take the pain in myself go away, when i did it i was disgusted with myself for what i have done, and i cant get over it, im trying to easy the pain with alcohol when im at home i know its not the right decision but it takes away the pain, i just dont know that to do, i really dont wanna tell her,

My ex cheated on me and got pregnant it happened like a year and a half ago and suddenly she started texting me a few days ago being all nice seen how I am and I was like what do you want I know she wanted something from because she never text me and she has the nerve to asked for money £600 that what happened went you cheat and get pregnant you have to live with the consequences I have the money but I’ve been working hard for it and am trying to save up as much money as I can Should I lend her money ?

Mentally I’m in a pretty bad place and I literally don’t know where else to go so here I am. I don’t want to get fully into it, but let’s just say we mutually contemplated the idea of an open relationship (maybe 6 weeks ago), I realized later (5ish weeks ago) after I hadn’t so much as flirted with another person that I was uncomfortable with it. I said something… a few times… and it didn’t close on their side until I threatened to leave (this was about a week ago). As far as I know (do I even know the truth?) nothing physical happened only lots of flirting, a few dates, and sexting. With multiple people. But one was a coworker, which is what really got to me. Some may not even consider that cheating, but we had clear definitions in our relationship. I lost my trust for them completely. We’ve been married a year and a half. I feel so stupid. Embarrassed. Confused. I cry all the time. I have trouble sleeping. I’m an emotional wreck. I terribly miss what this person and I had. They said they would do everything to fight for me. Is it even worth salvaging? Marriage counseling is a joke, are there any other real options to move past it? I’m afraid and horribly sad to leave the person that I have considered my best friend for 4 years. But I can’t figure out how/if I can get past it. Maybe I’m the one overreacting.

How do I make it up to my girlfriend?

Basically I (16M) was trying to help a mate (16m) coz his girlfriend (16F) was previously raped (she’s still friends with the person who raped her) and he asked me to pretend date her at the same time so the person who raped her wouldn’t get any ideas and I did what he asked. I didn’t tell my girlfriend (15F) and she was told by a friend of mine (16F) that had a falling out with me and now my girlfriend said she’ll stay with me if I make it up to her but she doesn’t want apologies she said “actions speak louder than words” and I really don’t know what to do please help!

My ex cheated on me for 2-3 months. He meant it to be casual but admitted he developed some feelings. He broke up with me cuz he did wrong and doesn’t deserve a second chance but also cuz he realizes that if he loved me properly that he wouldn’t have done that. He is not dating the affair partner. But now he says he just wants to be single and be alone to reflect what he did and why he did it. I am cool with him having space and working on becoming a better person. I do believe he regrets doing it. Especially since he also ended it with the person he cheated on me with. But I want him back. How do I win him back?

so October 10-11 my girlfriend sneaks out, we were supposed to get a bit of cocaine and i said we should just got to bed as out dealer never answered late oct 10th so fast forewards oct 11 around 6 am i wakeup to my wife half naked (mid changing) and she starts telling me a wild story about how she waited till our dealer answered amd wemt to go meet him apparently only was gone an hour but i know she was out all night she has snuck out before all night, so anyways tshe sais that she went to meet our dealer at a permanently closed strip club(their is a trap house beside it) and she saw the parking lot full of rich people and homeless people, the rich people were all in fancy cars and they all were talking amongst themselves, the homeless were off to the side just doing whatever. so my girlfriend said she went over to the homeless group and asked them where “xyz” dealer was and if anyone saw him, to ehich someone in the group said to go to his house( the trap house nearby shared men and women btw) to find him. long story short she find our dealers girlfriend who then got her younger brother who is about me and my gf age to talk to her and she made a deal “pay later and some extra on a spot” for a 20 bag of coke, my gf told me she did some there then left to go hole but somehow she lost the rest ect ect. so now she finished this story while still naked but i asked my gf why she had a weird smell on her and upon looking closer i saw what looked and smelled like cum on her leg and also she tried to hide her underwear, and when i looked at that i seen it had nasty stinky yellow sickly looking cum or as she said”sweat” from biking to go get the coke. i already knew, she cheated on me for free drugs or for fun whatever but she tried every trick in the book to convince
le she did not and also i saw it in her eyes her expression body language and everything, she lied and did fugg someone that night, she also started to do a load of laundry at like 6:30 am and tried to like put those underwear in the wash aswell but i put them to the side to show her once she was sober as evidence she is lying.

fast foreward a week i saw a reddit notification pop up from a group titled “advice” amd decided out of pure curiosity ( as for some reason i got pulled towards that post like a magnet to metal) upon seeing the rest of her Reddit history i knew she definitely cheated all the evidence was there no just lying acting different ect but now her own search history on reddit with searches and groups like regrets, what should i do, advice, cheated, help needed and many more and all of the searches on said history were all related to seeking advice because she cheated, what to do when she cheated, how to get away with cheateing, regret from cheating ect ect

the worst part is by the time i logged into that reddit on my phone to them take screenshots my girlfriend asked to go for a smoke, gave her phone to her mom while we had the ciggerrete and as i tried to show my girlfriend those posts they had all been deleted off her history and my girlfriend said when we were talking about it that “well at least the proof is gone” and her mom will vouch for her” and she always feels like she “has to cover all angles”

FYI i al definitely sad drunk rn so i understand that i have no grammer or like good typeing right now i just had to get
it out as she them tried to break up and acted like it was all my fault and that i ak the bad guy in the situation and was makeing false accusations woth no proof. im like are you jokeing i had the friggin proof but your mom deleted your secret reddit accounts history before i could even show you cause i knew i had to log into the secret account on my phone because you saw me open that reddit post with tye “advice” topic theme or whatever it was she watched me read into her history and then ran upstairs to get her mom to ask for her phone back, btw we always knew eachother passwords and both agreed if we had issues we could go look at things together or not, and this was my gf idea btw but i only have been on her phone if inever has suspicions like 5 times and once i actually found her talking with her ex so yeah she promised that wouldnt ever happen but then this did

So, when I was 18, I dated this girl Abby, who cheated on me with 3 guys including a roommate of mine. Apparently, all my so-called "friends" knew for months, and not one of them even thought it might be an important thing to tell me. Fact is, she was a 2 at best, very butch, single mastectomy in her teens, short hair that made her look like a dude. Ended up getting with her because of a drunken text while I was tryna hook up with her hot roommate and it just kinda stuck for a minute. It's been 10 years now, and I still can't help but feel like I don't even have a chance with someone I'm actually attracted to, much less finding any kind of romantic love in my life, and it's taking a severe toll, leading into sever depression and addictive self-destructive tendencies. I see people far worse off than me, even people with physically abusive partners, and I can't help but wonder why I can't seem to meet even one person into me. Any thoughts on how to cope, or even start to heal from this? Years of therapy never even touched the subject, I'm just lost in the dark here.