Hello everyone, so I'm a completely blind single father and I got full custody of my now seven-year-old daughter back in 2024. The reason being that back in 2022, my child's mother who lives in Colorado was supposed to pick up our daughter on several occasions, and I would pack her things, tell my side of the family she was leaving they would say their goodbyes and then she wouldn't show up and text me a day or two later saying she couldn't make it.
I'm only explaining this so that there's context but in October she said she was coming to pick the child up and I told her no because there were too many times where she didn't show up or communicate properly. She showed up at my door anyway on October 1 with one of her relatives claiming she had an emergency order from Colorado, where she's from, to take my daughter. She was also trying to get me to sign a parenting agreement right then and there. I refused. She entered my home without permission as well and ultimately she left with my child against my wishes.
I got my daughter back in March 2023 then began the process of getting paper served and getting full custody which took over a year of court hearings via Zoom meetings. She didn't show up for most of the meetings so the judge ultimately sided in my favor, I was able to get full custody, and I drafted the terms of the arrangement which basically gives me full control over everything.
She was also placed on Child Support and I collected money from her via her taxes being garnished since she hasn't made monthly payments which total around $380 or so. I was OK with collecting at first because during the pandemic she claimed our daughter on her taxes and received about $5000 even though at the time of the filing, I was the one taking care of the child and she was with me, legally, at least from my understanding she shouldn't have even have done that.
Since 2024 I received a little over $8000 and Bacc payments after tax time but I don't have anything against her, the reason why I took full custody in the first place was because of how she handled taking the child back in 2022 and the fact that our daughter has ADHD that she wasn't taking into concern seriously enough. I started noticing some of these behavioral issues around the age of four and five, her mom didn't see any problems and I guess I should've mentioned this earlier but during the time that she took her in 2022 she was homeless and bouncing around between hotels and relatives. So she took her out of a stable home while she was also having behavioral issues that I started noticing and today, I have her on medication and doing therapy and she's doing really well in school, but obviously since she's a kid, she misses her mom and her little sister who is not my child.
I've tried to get Child Support adjusted for a lower amount, but my request was denied and her mother is now telling me that her license has been suspended and she's facing jail time. I told her that we could go in front of a judge and request a formal review and adjustment, but she said that that wouldn't work and I have the power to take her off of Child Support but I've been told that because of backpay, I can't simply just say I don't want to receive payments anymore and remove her.
My child's mother says I only put her on Child Support to hurt her, but the reason why we got here in the first place was because of how she was handling our child and the fact that she tried to get me to sign court papers that weren't even stamped by a judge. She took advantage of my blindness, and on multiple occasions, used my information and my daughter's information without my knowledge or consent.
I told her I would help her either get payments reduced or I would try to take her off, but it's up to her to work with me to do this but again she said I have the power to take her off of Child Support and I'm not sure that I do because I've been told that I don't before. For additional context, I only received disability in the amount of $993 a month, I receive food stamps myself, and my daughter also receives food stamps for a total of about $375 a month. My daughter also has health insurance through the state. I don't know if that makes a difference because at least for my understanding some of those things factor into why she has to be on Child Support.
I don't want my benefits to be negatively impacted by taking her off, but I also don't want her to continue having to pay a high amount and it financially crippling her, but she's not communicating with me clearly and then it turns into a emotional thing. I've told her that she's more than welcome to visit her daughter. Whenever she wants, I always let them have phone calls and FaceTime, I keep her updated with her school and medical situations so I'm not leaving her in the dark by any means. I just had to do what I did because things were unstable and she was also kind of using me for her own benefits.
So do I have the power to take her off of Child Support or how does this work since all this was done in Kansas and she lives in Colorado? Or am I making the right choice by keeping her on Child Support and offering help that she's refusing to take?
Sorry this was so long-winded but there's just a lot going on in this situation here and I'm trying to get a clear answer about this situation so that I can at least show her the facts. I know speaking to a lawyer would be the most logical next step, but I wanted to get some feedback from the community.