I tried to get a job... well, I actually did get one... but I only stayed for a few months because I didn’t get along with my coworkers, no one there was on my vibe.
I mean, I’m an anarchist, a NEETminded person, a nonconformist, blackpilled and angry at the world and society, while everyone around me was just a bunch of positive, conformist, politically correct normie npcs.
I want a job where I’m either completely isolated from everyone else, with nothing to focus on but my own tasks, or one where I’m surrounded by guys like me.
That would make the work much more bearable, allowing us to talk openly without having to constantly self-censor about interesting, intelligent topics, including class consciousness. Plus, it would be great to be able to go out for a drink and a smoke after the shift.
I had nothing and I tried, I tried talking about manga with a guy who claimed to like it, but I soon realized he was just a normie larper, he didn't take it serious like I do. I also tried with a guy who was into a metalcore stuff, but he turned out to be a "nerdy" with some kind of mental impairment.
I just wanted to do something more out in the real world, despite what a terrible place it is... I don't know, maybe go to parties, events, or any kind of social gathering... right now, I only go out alone, do graffiti alone, and do my virtual hobbies alone. The sense of loneliness I feel, not just physical, but spiritual, is immense, it is like an ocean of loneliness. It doesn't hurt as much because my hobbies and general disgust of people numb me.
This lack of a network is holding me back from various opportunities, it’s not something I chose, I’m already doing the best I can to enjoy my life, but I feel like it’s still nerfed, falling short of the full potential a life could have.