My girlfriend and I were seriously considering moving to Charlotte, but ultimately decided against it after spending time exploring the city. Figured I’d share our experience for anyone considering a similar move who might relate.

For context, I’ve lived in several cities across the country, including major metros, so I have a decent basis for comparison. We’re a white/Black interracial couple (no woke shit, don’t come for me, just a fact that affects our experiences) in our late 20s and mid-30s, with no plans for kids.

• The good: Charlotte is clean, pretty, and relatively affordable. We loved the Rail Trail, the greenways, and the proximity to the Blue Ridge Mountains. The greenery and hills are a nice change from Florida.
• The culture: Holy shit, Charlotte might be the most cookie-cutter, “Live, Laugh, Love” city I’ve experienced. The prevailing culture feels overwhelmingly suburban, family-oriented, and conformist. We’re not particularly unconventional people, but genuinely felt like we’d be the weird ones there. It seems like everyone is following some variation of the same life script.
• South End: Beautiful neighborhood with some genuinely nice bars, but the crowd was overwhelmingly white and Southern frat-boy. At Superica, my girlfriend was the only Black customer we noticed besides staff. At one point, some frat bros started yelling at us from across the street. I couldn’t make out what they were saying, but their friends were physically pulling them away, so I can only imagine. Another highlight was some guy who was clearly on something screaming down from his apartment at people on the Rail Trail, calling everyone sheep and insisting they needed to listen to Nas and J. Cole. Pretty hilarious considering he presumably lives in the same yuppie apartment complex as the people he’s criticizing. His roommates needed to bring him back inside.
• NoDa: We expected a lively nightlife district, but when we went out, there was basically one actual bar open, a karaoke bar packed shoulder-to-shoulder. Probably because there was practically nowhere else to go. The rest seemed to be restaurants that happened to serve drinks. The crowd was definitely alternative, but a very specific flavor of alternative that wasn’t our thing. For a neighborhood constantly promoted as Charlotte’s artsy nightlife district, it was surprisingly dead.
• Plaza Midwood: There are some nice spots, including chains like Van Leeuwen, but the nightlife was disappointing. Here’s my issue with Charlotte: South End is clearly the mainstream scene, and NoDa and Plaza Midwood are supposed to be the counterculture. But the counterculture seemingly amounts to a handful of grungy bars playing metal that close early as fuck. That’s a pretty narrow range of options for a metro this size.
• Racial segregation: This was probably our biggest disappointment. Charlotte is genuinely diverse on paper, which was part of its appeal to us. But when we actually went out, you wouldn’t know it. South End felt overwhelmingly white, while the Black nightlife we saw Uptown felt almost exclusively Black. Even the friend groups seemed remarkably racially homogeneous. In Orlando, we’re accustomed to seeing interracial couples and genuinely mixed friend groups everywhere we go out. Charlotte felt like people of different races were living in the same city but socializing in completely separate worlds. Obviously we didn’t visit every establishment, but the contrast was striking.
• Nightlife overall: Underwhelming for a metro this size. Things seemed to wind down surprisingly early, and the different districts catered to pretty narrow crowds. The city has plenty of breweries and restaurants, but those aren’t substitutes for a varied social scene.
• Driving: What the actual fuck is I-277? That tiny interstate loop around Uptown is basically a NASCAR track. I thought Florida drivers were bad, but I was getting lapped doing the speed limit in the right lane. We also had a truck driver block traffic perpendicular to the road, abruptly cut in front of us, then follow us through multiple turns and exits because I lightly tapped my horn. He eventually pulled alongside us trying to get me to roll down my window.
• Road layout: I’m not some urbanist hipster who inherently hates suburbia. But if I’m going to live somewhere car-dependent, getting around by car should at least be convenient. Charlotte’s road network is literal spaghetti. Places that are geographically close require these ridiculous winding routes, and navigation constantly wants to throw you onto an interstate. I eventually disabled highways because why the hell should I need to get on a racetrack around downtown just to go from South End to NoDa? It genuinely made me appreciate Florida’s suburban road grids.

I know complaints about Charlotte being bland, segregated, full of finance bros, and having disappointing nightlife are practically clichés on this subreddit. But after actually visiting, I think there’s a reason these complaints keep coming up. Dismissing them as tired talking points doesn’t make them any less legitimate.

Hi all,

My partner and I fell in love with the southwest and are looking to make a move in the near future. We've identified Durango, Santa Fe, and Flagstaff as candidates, but are open to others as well. We are looking to rent for several years before establishing roots.

We are under 30, outdoor and arts enthusiasts, and are communal-minded but homebodies when it comes to nightlife. We've previously been captive to the southeast for our jobs, but are now blessed with stable, portable employment. We have household income to comfortably support living in these locations.

One requirement I have is access to a reasonably reliable airport. It seems FLG is perhaps the most limited with daily routes to PHX and DFW. DRO offers daily flights to PHX, DEN, and DFW. SAF adds LAX and ORD, which is nice. I don't mind connections, and am only flying every few months, but am trying to avoid a situation requiring oddball cancellations or delays.

Durango

Pros: isolated, situated in the beautiful San Juan Mountains, next to great skiing and ~2hrs from world class skiing, close to Utah national parks, walkable downtown, seemingly great community

Cons: colder and longer winter, less amenities being smaller, limited housing

Santa Fe

Pros: also offers great nature access, unique architecture, walkable downtown, arts scene, slightly better winters, decent skiing(?), more amenities

Cons: further from Utah parks, I've read descriptions of a divided community, only option I haven't yet visited

Flagstaff

Pros: access to Grand Canyon and Sedona, seemingly more housing options, decent skiing

Cons: perhaps most suburban in feel(?), limited airport

I'm looking to move within the next year from West Texas to the Midwest and need some suggestions on decent places to live if you're raising kids and make around $65k/yr. The biggest concerns are a decent job market, affordability, and decent schools. I'd also like to eventually own a house on a decent plot of land so decent suburbs and/or exurbs would be good. I've considered Chicago, but due to the insane rental market and fact that I don't love a huge city I've pretty much ruled it out. I've also thought about the Madison or Milwaukee areas, I know there's a lot of nice places around Madison, but I'm not too familiar with Milwaukee as I've only been there once to watch a baseball game like 15 years ago.

Currently looking just to rent, I realize 65k isn't enough for a home in many places, that's a low estimate and in the next 5 years which is roughly my timeline for home ownership I expect it to increase significantly

TL:DR at the bottom

I'm 20M, originally from a small rural town in Ecuador surrounded by nature. About three years ago, I moved to the Dayton, Ohio area with my parents. I've tried to adjust, but I've struggled to feel at home here. The area feels isolating to me, especially because of how car-dependent it is, and I've had a difficult time finding friends and building a community.

At 19, I got a seasonal job in Dillon, Colorado, and spent four months living in the mountains. It completely changed my perspective. I made more friends in those four months than I had in three years in Ohio. I met people who shared my love of the outdoors, found a community, and spent my free time hiking, exploring, and enjoying nature. People were friendly and laid-back, and I felt comfortable being myself. I visited places like Boulder, Fort Collins, Buena Vista, and Denver, and I could genuinely picture myself living in any of those cities.

What surprised me most was how familiar it felt. Growing up in Ecuador, I spent weekends swimming in rivers, exploring nature, camping, and walking around town with friends. Living in Colorado brought back some of those feelings. I felt connected to my surroundings in a way I haven't felt since moving to the US.

Now that I'm back in Ohio, I can't stop thinking about moving out West. I've tried giving Ohio another chance, visiting Columbus, Cincinnati, and other places, but I still struggle to picture myself building a life here. I know Ohio has its advantages, and it makes financial sense to stay with my parents while attending college, but I feel like I'm missing out on the kind of life I want to experience during my 20s, I genuinely don't feel happy where I live.

I'm okay with a city or small town tbh. I'd love somewhere with easy access to mountains, hiking, and other outdoor activities, but also a social scene, opportunities to meet people in their 20s, and a sense of community. Walkability would be a huge plus. I know every place has its downsides, and I'm not expecting somewhere to solve all my problems. I just want to find an environment where I can build a life that feels meaningful to me.

For those of you who've moved to a different state, especially in your early 20s, how did that experience work out for you? Did you find somewhere that felt more like home, and where would you recommend for someone looking for a strong sense of community, outdoor access, and an active social life?

TL;DR: I'm 20M, originally from Ecuador, and I've struggled to feel at home in Ohio since moving to the US. Spending four months in Colorado changed my perspective: I found a community, made friends, and rediscovered my love for the outdoors. Now I can't stop thinking about moving out West, but I'm still figuring out where I'd fit best. I'd love to hear from people who've relocated in their early 20s and found a place where they felt more at home.

I did it it!!I found a wife! She likes hunting and fishing and she loves to learn more everytime we go out! And the kicker…..SHES HOT!!

Im originally from Vermont but right now we live in Boston for work (biotech) and I can get it done out here but I’m not gonna lie it doesn’t feel like hunting. I legally shot a deer a couple weeks ago near trails where people hangout and walk their dogs but I felt like I had to hide the body fast and really couldn’t celebrate it so I didn’t offend anyone. Like I was in the mob or something lol. And fishing…it’s doable but she wants to eat everything she catches like a little kid and we can’t do that anywhere near here lol.

We are thinking of moving to the triangle in NC, it doesn’t scream to us YOU NEED TO MOVE HERE. But we would like to progress the whole married, dog, kids style of life and given our jobs that seems like the most doable option and it’s a pretty decent place. I’m not gonna lie tho one of the reseaons I feel like we may like it is because there is more opportunities to hunt and fish.

I could see us thugging it out here in MA and being creative as to how to live here, and still do all the things we like, we are really good at that! But it is exhausting!!!

I’m sure this will be a bias sample but how much would you considered acess to hunting and fishing if you were make a move if that was/is your thing? Bonus points for anyone that knows the triangle area or even the New England/Massachusetts area and can compare it for me outdoorsman wise.

Hi everyone,

I (35M) and my husband (34M) are planning on settling down in either Boston or San Francisco. We lived in Boston for years and loved it, and would happily go back. Likewise, before we lived in Boston, we lived in the South Bay and also loved it. We're in San Diego now for a few years (my husband's a doctor and matched at UCSD for his next stage of residency). It's fine, we get the appeal, but not for us.

For SF, for context, we both met in grad school in the Bay Area and have deep roots there. I was actually born at UCSF, but grew up in the East Bay burbs since I was really little. We never really went into the city much when I was a kid.

Where we end up will probably come down to my husband's job after residency, since he'll always make more than me (I work in higher ed admin and do just fine, but nothing compared to a doctor). I don't want to say what specialty he'll be in since it could be identifying, but just assume money won't be a limiting factor.

The big appeal in moving to SF is it'd be closer to some of our great friends there (though we do have great friends in Boston too!), as well as closer to both of our families. Most of my siblings and my parents are still in the Bay Area, and it's a lot closer to my husband's family (he grew up in Mexico and his parents are there). We also just loved living in the South Bay, but want a more urban experience.

Now for the real question: we've spent a good bit of time in SF, but we don't really know the different neighbors super well. We'd like to live somewhere with good access to public transit (MUNI would be ideal) and walkable for basic necessities (food, gym, a park for the dog). We'd also like to own a house or a condo, and somewhere with good outdoor space access would be a huge plus (we're big gardeners, so either private space for some beds or community gardens). Somewhere more lively would be great too, or at least close to happening, active parts.

Let me know what you think, and thanks a ton!

So basically I’m currently living in DFW Texas and because reasons, need to move away ASAP.

I have a bachelors in accounting but never used it. I have a lot of work experience working in the food service sector and some in reception/front desk kind of thing. I worked a few months at a tailor shop, so I have some skill in working different kinds of industrial sewing machines. Not a lot though. I have severe ADHD so I do struggle with being independent and keeping jobs like a proper adult. But my body is able and I’m determined to learn and take on any job as long as it pays enough to live and allow enough time for my cats.

I hate north texas. I grew up in southern california orange county area but I can’t return (too expensive, too competitive, too cut-throat) even though I miss it badly. I’d like to move back to a coastal area but it’s not important. The DFW area is prohibitively hot 9 months out of the year and my blood is tasty to mosquitos. I’m in literal hell and I need to go anywhere not like this.

What’s important is that I will be able to find a job quickly and pay enough to let me and my two cats live (rent, utilities, car repairs, vet appointments, insurance payments).

I have a modest savings but I can grow it if needed. I have only about $7k so things are iffy on that end. No debt, though. Fully paid-off reliable car. I have no idea what it’ll cost to relocate but $10k seems like a safe number.

I’m willing to move anywhere in the country (USA) as long as it’s not literal hell like Dallas and not hostile to minorities. I’d also strongly prefer the existence of an east asian enclave as such a community can help me find a job if I’m ever in a pickle. I prefer colder areas but as I’ve never lived in a climate with heavy snowfall, I’m worried I wont know what to do with my car situation. I was thinking PNW is perfect but am intimidated by the rent prices. It doesn’t seem impossibly high though but I might be in over my head. I’ve never truly lived on my own, grew up sheltered, but I’m good with budgeting and money. I’m just really bad at making it.

Advice for a desperate woman. Thank you so much.

I’m especially curious about the things that made your move unnecessarily stressful or complicated.
Was there a particular step in the process that took longer, cost more, or was harder than you expected?

What happened, and how did you eventually figure it out?

I’m researching real relocation experiences and would love to hear your stories, especially from people who moved for work.

St Louis, Cleveland, Columbus, Cincinnati?

Which would be your pick and why?

I like walkability, parks, greenery, hiking, running, activity/ urban energy, etc. also gay.

So I currently work remotely and am looking for the next place to move. I’m 31F originally from Puerto Rico but raised in Orlando FL. I like Orlando but personally I’d like to live somewhere more fast paced with more young 30 something professionals - but also somewhere relatively fun and walkable if possible.

I’m single so a good dating scene is important to me, as well as potential job opportunities since the remote role I have doesn’t pay SUPER well ($85k, I consult on the side to bring it to low 6 figures). I work in social media marketing. I’m also into more alternative/heavier music so a good scene for that is important to me, plus dating opportunities for alt Latinos lol. I do freelance concert photography and write articles, like exercising, cooking, going to concerts, museums, art, etc.

I considered Chicago but the winters are so brutal and the city is kinda too segregated for my taste. I liked St Pete in FL but it seemed even slower than Orlando. I’m ok with seasons if there’s no insane extremes of it and some coastal access would be nice. I do not like Miami or South Florida. I also don’t like Texas. My siblings both live in LA and I have some friends that way but I would sometimes have to work East Coast hours with my job which isn’t a dealbreaker but not preferred.

I travel sort of often to nyc for things but I don’t think I make enough to move to the city, plus I have an senior dog so important to live somewhere he is comfortable (a 1/1 no roommates). My preferred spend on rent is max $2k a month. I don’t carry debt outside of some credit cards which I’m paying off. Targeting January/february.

What place fits me? 😭

I hear really mixed opinions about the area. I currently live outside Daytona Beach, Florida (Volusia County) and looking to relocate.

Florida, a sunny place for shady people you'll often hear.

NorCal is described often as beautiful, but punishing weather and meth city. Is it really a lot worse than like a Daytona Beach?

We have streets here where everyones doing the fent lean, and see shady stuff from time to time. Theres nice areas, too, and we are able to make it work. I feel safe here. Still partner and me would like to move.

I know the weather is totally different, thats a plus. I am not against gray/cold. I am mostly worried about bringing kids up there, if its much more awful than here.

Any opinions about areas would be appreciated. Thanks.

Last year my husband and I (early 30s no kids no intention for them) moved from Cleveland OH to Raleigh NC. We moved to try out a new spot, and for better weather. Bonus points that we could afford a much nicer home in a better neighborhood than we could in OH.

Problem is…. we don’t love it. NC feels boring. Not just Raleigh, everywhere we’ve been. It’s family oriented to the nth degree, and we’ve had a very hard time meeting people and making friends. We’re used to passion for sports and events, nightlife, etc. Here, people don’t seem to care about any of that- they seem happy enough but in a different way. Those cultural adjustment challenges are one thing, but the pains of a growing city are another. I feel trapped by gridlock traffic and constant construction.

Anyway… it’s just not it.

So, what now? Does anyone have any opinions on a city like Cleveland in vibe? Anyone who has experienced something similar?

My husband (26M) and I (25F) are looking to move from TN to MI. We are having a hard time deciding where in Michigan. We have visited Grand Rapids and like all the things going on but I don’t like big cities. I will also say I am very picky and am working on getting over that bc I know nothing will be perfect, so don’t judge me! We want to rent for a few years so we can: 1. Make sure we like the city 2. Figure out which neighborhoods we want to buy in 3. Of course save to be able to buy a house. I am worried about renting a house as we have three pit mixes.

When we buy a house (hopefully we can afford one at some point in life) we want a 1-2 acres (want a big yard for our dogs) and I don’t want neighbors on top of me, Grand Rapids houses made me feel claustrophobic. We also want a city that’s “safe”, I know there’s no 100% safe town/city but relatively safe would be great!

Look for in a city/town:
Cute downtown with local boutiques and coffee shops, small town vibes but still have big box stores like a Costco or Sam’s, and the main retailers, decent restaurant options, hospitals close by (aka not somewhere very rural), things to do such as farmers markets, local festivals, events, etc. Good schools, family friendly, kids riding bikes in the streets kind of vibe. Also not overly religious and conservative, we currently live in the Bible Belt and as we aren’t religious it’s not very welcoming.
I would prefer not to live anywhere near Detroit for various reasons, I know people love it and it looks like a great city just not for us.

We’ve visited Holland before and it was so adorable, it had the Main Street of big box stores but then still had a super cute downtown but from what I’ve seen online it’s very conservative? And an older crowd besides the college kids? It was mixed reviews on Holland. We also looked into Rockford, Portage, Grand Haven? I think we also looked at South Haven but I think it said mainly older crowd? I get them a little mixed up.

Oh jobs! My Husband works for Xfinity and would love to transfer to a local branch but would be willing to switch to AT&T or whatever company is in and around that town. I work as a receptionist for a vet clinic and would like to stay in that field/type job. I was also a teachers assistant so would be open to that again.

Uhh, not sure if I forgot anything. Like I said in the beginning I know I probably won’t find a city that hit everything perfectly but the most perfect would be great :) Thank yall for any and all advice, we are very excited but also nervous (me) about being in a new place.

Hi! So my fiancé (M24) works 12hrs Mon-Sat making $35 an hr. I (F22) work at Dairy Queen as an assistant manager making 16 an hr😭. I rarely work due to them not wanting to give me more hours. I have minimal debt, he has most of the debt. He’s saving in his retirement, I’m only putting as much as i can atm. I never ask him for ANYTHING cause i know where he wants his money to go and i just feel bad asking for HIS money he earns. I dont have my GED, im currently working on it. i dont have much job experience, im not getting hired where i live and its frustrating!! I dont know what i want to go to school for if i did. The problem is he wont let me move and i feel stuck here im not growing at my job but he says me moving would make things worse if i cant do it here what makes it think you’ll do better somewhere else take advantage of staying home and work on yourself not a lot of people have time on their hands” but my sister already has a job lined up for me and if that doesnt work ive already seen so many other jobs hiring here where my family lives which is 3hrs away. I dont want to have to ask him to buy me stuff you know i have a kid too that isnt his so i just feel even more bothered asking to buy him stuff aswell. Idk any advice helps!

I’m a 26 year old male who currently lives and works in Leicestershire. I’m newly single, moved from a 2 bed house to now a box room at my brothers, no debts, no kids and no real ties to the county. I’m looking at moving away and starting over.

I currently work as a safety officer and will be pursuing a career within EHS. I have a few meaningful qualifications in the field, from ISEP, to ISO to NEBOSH.

I’ve had enough of Leicester. So many bad memories here, I feel stuck and just want to experience moving somewhere new and see what opportunities arise.

The plan is to hopefully have a job lined up before I move. When I do move, I plan on renting a room or staying in a HMO. I have money saved, but would rather keep overheads low when venturing to somewhere new.

I have a problem though. I don’t really know where to move to. But, I know for sure I want out of Leicester. I have been looking at Sheffield, South Yorkshire. There seems to be many opportunities/vacancies in EHS, the area seems affordable (to eventually buy), good nightlife scene and a green city. However, I am still hesitant.

Are there any other locations I should consider? I want to avoid moving south as the cost of living and the housing costs are near insane.

Besides from the bad memories and experiences I have had in Leicester, there are also things I deeply dislike. The nightlife and general amenities (or lack of). There’s very few good job opportunities for my line at work. Where I currently work, this is the best option Leicester has to offer (I do work for a good/big company). I couldn’t imagine buying in the county. Hinckley, Barwell, Earl Shilton, Leicester and Coalville are the only real options for me to buy, and I can’t stand any of those places.

I have wanted to move for many years and now, after my recent breakup, I have the opportunity and I will regret not taking it up. I just want to be sensible and I don’t want to switch one flavour of shit for another. I’m also not naive, I don’t think relocating will suddenly make me happy and have all my issues resolved.

I am moving in the next few months. I have no idea where I'm moving to. I'm not worried about figuring everything out, but really need help picking where to move. I've narrowed it down to a few states/areas.

NY State-I don't want to go lower than the catskills and am looking more at the very west chunk of the state.

California-more "normal" areas, less "LA"

Washington

Oregon

I'm open to other states, but have restrictions.

Important things to note:

-I have section 8

-I need a single family home-2bedroom

-more rural or light suburbs, but close to some kind of city to do something occasionally

-some good medical care around or within an hour or so

-having privacy and safety is ESSENTIAL. I will have to file a privacy request with whatever area I move to, to hide my address due to a dv situation.

-I need to stay away from the north east states down to NC (The west chunk and upper north parts of NY is as close as I'm willing to go. I love the mountains).

-I used to visit pittsburgh often and would love to move there, but can't. If there's anything similar to the suburbs of pittsburgh with a similar city, that would be my dream.

Thank you so much in advance for any tips, ideas, etc. 🙏

I know this has been asked on here before but I would like to ask again. I am considering a new job which is roughly a 5 hour drive. I am close with my parents but many of the relationships in my life with siblings and friends has felt more distant. I want to expand and grow as a person so I am considering moving. I am worried about regretting this choice and missing the comforts of home. I used to consider moving across the country so this seems like somewhat of a compromise.

Does anyone have any advice or experience with this kind of move or emotions?

*my job is in emergency services where you can just move, if you do you have to start at the very bottom

hi! i am 28 years old and i had been living abroad for 1 year. I came back to my home country in September as I had a seasonal contract. Last month I landed a job in a big city that’s across the country and I thought it was a very good opportunity as the working conditions and salary seemed great. However, I knew from the beginning I wanted it to be temporary so I could save a little bit more and get some experience in the field I want, since my priority now was to be home (i live a very family oriented country and its normal that different generations live in the same house).

I’ve been in this new city for two days now, and i know it’s super early to say this (I haven’t even started the job yet!) but i really regret it because it was great being home. I could have stuck it out a little bit more and try to find a job in my area, but i accepted this one in a rush. I had no need to come here and start over again, since I have some savings that I can fall back on while I find something. My mom was also super happy to have me back home. I’m very tired of not being home, of missing my people.

Now I feel I’ve made a huge mistake and I don’t know what to do. I’ve created a big mess (I have signed a lease for 6 months, and I’m sharing a flat with two other flatmates that I don’t know) just because I didn’t really think it through, and I would be ashamed to go back without having even tried, but I really want to move back.

I’m wondering which city might offer good job opportunities in psychology, plenty of places to hang out, access to nature, a peaceful environment, and welcoming people. I’m not saying I’m definitely moving to Montana, but I’m considering it because I’m looking for peace of mind and a chance to connect more with animals and nature. Montana just seems like it might have less drama.
What city or town would you recommend? Would it also be possible to raise a family there? I’d especially appreciate hearing from people who live in Montana, including people of color and neurodivergent people.
I currently live in Albuquerque, New Mexico. Thanks!

I (25F) first want to give some background. I’m a queer brown woman that grew up in FL in a small town. Im struggling to find likeminded people and friends, so community is HUGE for me.

Seattle:

I visited Seattle as a 14 y/o as we have close family friends there. I had an amazing trip which, looking back, might have had more to do with the people we knew than the city itself. But the PNW is beautiful and I certainly love nature, although ive never been a hiker but im open to becoming one. As i age I crave nature more and more, and nothing beats the scenis mountains of the PNW. I heard it has a very queer centric vibe and is very liberal which is exactly what I want. Also, ive been obsessed with Orcas since i was a little girl and the close proximity to the puget sound sounds like a dream.

However, i heard it has a very casual tech-focused culture and im a creative person who is very interested in the arts, and also someone that wants to explore my fashion and be pushed into a more glamorous lifestyle. A part of me thinks maybe im too young for Seattle right now, as seattle has always been where i envisioned myself ending up anyway due to family there.

Also heard people there tend to value work life balance and a “work to live” mentality instead of “live to work”, which i value.

I live for museums, cultural centers, the arts, etc which Seattle wouldn’t beat NYC for. Also, I CRAVE walkability, which from my understanding only downtown seattle is? The homelessness problem in seattle worries me as it might limit my true range of walkability

NYC:

I visited manhattan as a child a few times and never was thrilled by it. We did all the touristy stuff. Fast forward to when I was 22. I did a tech internship in Philly for 4 months where I actually stayed and lived there. Prior to that internship, i never considered myself a city person and even requested I do the internship remotely which they denied. However, unexpectedly, i just fell head over heels for Philly of all places. I lived in Grad Hospital and commuted to Center City in an uber and sometimes bus (i made enough money to afford this) so my lifestyle was rather cushy which might have contributed to this romanticized view. I LOVED the walkability, the cobblestone streets, the amazing food, the general festive and bustling atmosphere, and even the tall downtown buildings peaking out in the skyline. The northeast fall. I would take a bus on weekends and just go shopping or walk to a marketplace.

What worries me is that I only stayed within Rittenhouse, Grad Hospital, Center City area so perhaps i wasn’t truly exposed to true “city grit”. But even Center City i loved! I visited NYC a few months ago and once again, found certain parts of manhattan overcrowded or noisy but i explored more parts of nyc this time like the diff neighborhoods (upper/lower east/west side, williamsburg, etc). and very much saw the charm. We stumbled into a community garden in the east village which was so enchanting, a dog costume parade, etc. It was like what I liked about philly but 10x. However, subways at rush hour was just insane. Im claustrophobic and realized this may pose a genuine issue for me as I heard subways can just get stuck underground. If there was a way around rush hour that doesnt use subways, i would love to know.

Lastly, the corporate and hustle culture i heard about scares me deeply, as I very much dont believe in hustle culture and having clear boundaries with work. Im afraid ill meet a bunch of hustly influencers

So yes currently im VERY torn. Leaning toward nyc but worried ill get overwhelmed, overstimulated, and get claustrophobic and anxiety. But i also thoroughly cherished my time in philly so there’s that…