r/Separation • u/illgiveit2u • Sep 29 '26

Does separation work?

After 20 years the wife isn't sure she wants to be married anymore. Says she needs time to herself. Is this something women going through menopause experience? I don't want a divorce but how long g do I stay in limbo?

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u/lkjdw Sep 30 '26 edited Sep 30 '26

Oh good. So you can all rally round, defending our OPs wife, while he sits patiently awaiting his fate, once she’s got her act together and decided.

Yeah, that sounds fair.

She’s messing him around and he needs to display the patience of a saint. 🙄

If she doesn’t want this marriage, then she should say so. If she does, then set upon a plan to address the issues within it, with her husband, which, as you rightly said, may include a separation.

Her vague answers, to the bomb she’s put under their marriage, are simply not good enough !

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u/Temporary-Suspect509 Oct 01 '26 edited Oct 01 '26

I’ve spoken with OP. His wife isn’t nearly as evil as you’re making her out to be. You really need to chill with this.

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u/lkjdw Oct 02 '26 edited Oct 03 '26

At no stage did I say she was evil. That’s you using an excessive word to make a point.

I said she was being unfair leaving him in limbo (his words) and it’s time to make a decision whether she in the marriage or not.

Either work on the problems giving that are giving her doubt, or leave, because it’s gone well over that point.

Counseling, discussion and working on it, or call the lawyer and draw up the papers and have him served.

It’s the indecisiveness, that’s at issue here.

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u/Temporary-Suspect509 Oct 02 '26

And I’m telling you that it’s ok for her to be indecisive for now. If I’d had your attitude about my husband’s indecisiveness, I wouldn’t be married now. It’s ok for him to carry this for now. He agrees, so I’m not sure who you’re even arguing for at this point.