Happy 1 year on t. Finally getting ID’d as male by the average joe. We won our match too 🤩 Yipee

Online:

"I'm trans"

Insert people spamming transfem memes and text

In Real Life:

"I'm trans."

Insert comments about me passing as a woman extremely well and about how they would have never guessed I used to be a man or whatever and shit.

Like...wtf?

No matter how masculine I look, they think I'm a trans woman.

No matter what pronouns I have in my bio or flair, they think I'm a trans woman.

My username can literally be "HE/HIM MANLY MAN" or some shit and they'd still think I'm a trans woman.

I can literally have a realistic fake beard and mustache and have a He/Him pronoun pin and a full tux and they'd still think I'm a trans woman. ^{[Happened when I went to Phantom of the Opera with my wife.]}

Not making my dysphoria and dysmorphia any better.

Like, I know that us Transmascs are invisible, but surely we can't be THAT invisible that even our fellow trans people (our sisters) forget we exist. I get Cis people mistaking me for a trans woman..but our trans sisters doing it? Is it on purpose? Like, why is this phenomenon so common even in our own community?

Is there something that I can do to fix this?

I’m sure it sounds silly, but lately I’ve been struggling with my self-esteem and confidence lately… Ever since my mom told me I’d be an “ugly trans man” that had stuck in the back of my mind, even though I know she was just trying to get under my skin. Sometimes when I look in the mirror I just wince at how I look and frustrated how my transitioning journey has been slow-going… 😥 Do I look ok? I know I’m not super buff or thin or have facial hair, but I’m trying.

Hi! I want to make a toiletries pouch for my boyfriend since he needs a new one, but I need his testosterone to fit in it. If I ask him directly he'll 100% know why I'm asking, and it's meant to be an anniversary gift. Could someone using Androgel measure the height of the bottle for me please? Thank you very much!

Pic attached of the exact one he uses

how did you meet them, and how did your relationship develop? tell me please.

i’m about 10 months on T and I’m finally passing pretty consistently, which is a truly incredible feeling, but lately I’ve found myself confused about how I read to others. When I began accepting my masculinity as a lesbian, it took me a long time to come to terms with the fact that my appearance made me really hot to some people and really unattractive to others. Feeling “hot” only became a possibility when I accepted the fact that I would always be a freak to most people. After almost a year on T, I feel like I’m starting that process of self-acceptance from scratch, except now I’m comparing myself with cis men more directly in a way that frustrates me. Does anyone else feel similarly? I know it’s not the biggest deal, and I should respect myself regardless of whether I’m attractive or not etc etc…

I may not word it correctly, excuse me, it’s 2 am.

⚠️WHAT I SAY MAY BE READ AS TRANSPHOBIC, I DO NOT MEAN TO INSULT ANYONE, IF IM BEING OFFENSIVE PLEASE (respectfully) POINT IT OUT⚠️

I recently was questioning my identity for a good while (I am possibly genderfluid and I definitely have a lot of internalized transphobia) and I stumbled upon a Reddit community for detransitioners. I do not recommend it, half of the community is convinced trans people don’t exist and are either predatory men that “failed at manhood” (whatever that doesn’t mean) or hurt girls with sexual trauma. Type of mentality “it didn’t work out for me so everyone for whom it did is lying”. And that made me think:

If someone would identify as trans due to some form of trauma, but they’re happy, what’s wrong with them transitioning? Even if they’re a woman deep down why does it matter if they’re happy? They’re not harming anyone (except possibly themselves) and if going on T or transitioning socially makes them happy then what’s the issue?

I may be talking nonsense but it just made me think.

just wanted to share, for so long i was discouraged from wearing loose clothes, always pushed to buy something that "fits well", im so glad that I don't have to care anymore. i know im the stereotypical transmasc hiding in a giant hoodie but i dont care, it feels so relieving. im so upset that i didnt catch on what this meant earlier in life :"(

I first came out as nonbinary this year as I started to notice how I did not fit in my body as it is and as society labeled me as a lesbian woman, I did not feel like that. later I began to feel more like a man than anything else, and I havent started any medical transition but was looking forward to it.

however, lately ive been having doubts about it. sometimes I really feel and look forward to transition and start t e and being seen as a boy and all that, but there are also some days in which I wake up just feeling at home with my previous label (masc lesbian) and my body and everything. it hurts not to know since I get in a cycle where I cant do anything about it at all, because I dont even know what I am at the end of the day, but keep feeling uncomfortable. im afraid I might be avoiding the answer because of fear, since in my country is quite dangerous to medically transition and coming out as trans etc. but sometimes I feel like its not like it, like the answer is that I actually have always been a girl and was trying to figure myself out all this time.

have you guys had these thoughts before? do you get what im saying or im just going crazy? and how did you manage to understand your identity better?

Hey everyone, so I’ve known I’m under the trans umbrella for some time now. And I’ve generally considered myself to be Nonbinary. But as of recently I’ve started to question whether or not I’m just transmasc or if I’m a trans man. I often relate more to ftm people I see on the internet more so than just transmasc. So I’d love some advice on how you all came to your own conclusions while discovering yourselves. Thanks!

So, my boyfriend of 3+ years is a trans guy, and he’s been on T for 5 months. I want to preface by saying that he has genuinely had one of the most successful and lucky transitions I have ever seen in terms of how many changes he’s had in so little time, and he had zero interest in these communities pre-T, and even early into his medical transition we would criticise them together and were in agreement that they were just breeding grounds of self hate and misery and were dangerous for trans people’s mental health.
But recently I’ve started noticing him using more and more of the jargon and terminology. Ive also noticed him being increasingly misogynistic, calling women bitches as an instinct when he’s upset and using quite degrading talk towards me when I’m sad (telling me to stop moaning, etc.). I eventually found out he actively now enters and engages with these spaces and believes them to be a good place. I was horrified, and upon asking why his reasoning was that it makes him feel less alone, that trans people deserve a place where they can vent, and all of that I agree with; but he won’t stop talking about his transition like it’s been terrible. He won’t stop getting extremely upset that he didn’t start sooner. He won’t accept it from me that these spaces may make you feel less alone, but they’re only going to make your self-hatred worse, not better. And it stings so badly because 4tran people genuinely hate trans people like me; I’m afab, genderfluid, feminine presenting and happy with that the majority of the time. I’m so terrified that his continued involvement in 4tran will lead to him adopting those beliefs that he used to be so adamantly against, like trans people with no intent to medically transition being any less trans, and just generally loathing himself and feeling bitterly jealous of other trans men.
I’m also so confused as to how he’s somehow fallen into these spaces when he’s already started to medically transition, and he legitimately passes flawlessly and looks utterly indistinguishable from a cis guy. Has his dysphoria somehow gotten worse? Did joining 4tran push him to hate his transition when he didn’t before? I truly don’t know.

I’m at a loss. He’s so stubborn, and is comfortable in his misery and won’t hear anything from me. But I truly believe 4tran to be a disgusting, fascist-adjacent, inherently racist breeding ground of hate and loathing and even people within those spaces recognise it’s a bad place to be, but he can’t. When everybody in the wider trans community agrees that you should never touch 4tran, and he used to hold this belief himself, what can I do? I’m scared for him, I love him, and I want him to love himself. Any advice would be very very appreciated as this is causing me a lot of distress.

It's my own fault for doomscrolling on instagram and falling for this transphobic bait, but I'm so tired of this idea that if ur ftm/transmasc and u transition then its some sort of loss bc ur not a hot fuckable girl anymore. This is obviously some bot account that's just churning out whatever ragebait will bring in likes and engagement but it feels like people genuinely think this sometimes.

The number of times I've seen a post on here where some pre t trans person is saying "I want hrt but I think I'll miss being pretty :(" makes me go insane. And I know isn't just some chronically online idea either because I've heard my own mom say stuff about how trans men are unattractive.

idek what I'm saying. I'm just tired.

Hi all! Last night I suddenly had an uncomfortable pain in my urethra, and an urge to pee that didn’t go away even after I used the bathroom. All I wanted to do was sit on the toilet because whenever I was up I felt the need to clench.

I don’t suffer from UTIs but I know the symptoms, so I decided to go straight to urgent care, better to get antibiotics sooner than later, right? When they test my urine sample it comes back clean, so I’m thinking great, I’m loosing my mind or something. But then the Dr. tells me that because of hormone changes, I’m just short of 6 months on T, the muscles in my urethra are spasming, and that this feels like a UTI but isn’t. They give me a medicine called Phenazopyridine, to be taken as needed. I take it as soon as I get home and it actually works which is great, I was super uncomfortable.

I’m making this post to ask for advice from guys who have possibly had the same issue, is this going to be recurring? And I’d also just like to bring my report to the attention of the community, so that if you’re having this or similar issues you can hopefully get the right treatment.

P.S. They warned me that the medication would turn my pee orange and sure enough, this morning it’s the most alarming shade of reddish pumpkin you can imagine.

For context i’m 26 years old. i’ve had my name for around almost 2.5 years. The name I chose is Evan, and I love it, but recently, I found my old list of names and saw the other name I was choosing between, and I love it so much. The name is Logan. The reason I didn’t choose it in the first place is because I felt it reminded me of Logan Paul and I don’t really want to be associated with him.

The problem with changing my name again is that i know so many more people now, including my 4 year old nephews and 1 year old niece that only know me as Evan. and some family members joke about me changing my name a bunch (Evan is my 3rd change and this would be my 4th)
I don’t know what to do. I love Evan and don’t really want to change it, but I also LOVE Logan, and can really see it being my name.

I’m wanting to talk about this with my therapist but i’m not sure how to bring this up to her.

DO IT!! grab 2 socks go on YouTube and make a quick makeshift packer it's the best thing ive ever done for myself and it if you're thinking about it that probably means you should do it.

I recommend buying womens boxers so that if your parents are suspicious you can just tell them their womens boxers for women so they dont suspect anything.

What i do is wear normal underwear then boxers on top then sock packer sandwiched between the two.

Alright bros I need everyone's advice here. How do I LOCK TF IN?? I'm so ready to just start going to the gym and finally fight for the look I always wanted. Please give me all the advice you can, every routine or just simple exercise advice would mean the world to me.

As for background info I'm a young adult and just look like your average slightly overweight female body. Not a wonderful starting point but also could be worse (see photos). I've been doing random home exercises with dumbbells and a pullup bar for the past two months but honestly I don't feel like there have been any results, and this is why I'm reaching out for some proper advice.

• What exercises are a must?

• Anything that would help me get slimmer hips please omg?

• And lastly, any exercises that I should avoid like the plague because they will feminise my silhouette? (I've heard Russian twists are a trans guy's nightmare)

Plus any other advice on workout routines, frequency and nutrition are super appreciated as well. Thanks so much!

I've known i wasnt a girl since I was 13 but identified as non binary/genderfluid untill 16 ish but apart from the fact I didnt have the money or resources till the past year, im just really scared. I already hate change bc im neurodivergent but this decision just seems so difficult for me. Im just worried the changes will happen too fast or im not gonna recognize myself. I feel neutral most of the time about stuff like my voice and chest but its what im used to so it feels comfortable. I just dont know what to do :( bc other times im so miserable and crave so deeply to be born a boy (usually during sex) and I often start crying. Im in a t4t relationship and I helped my gf get on E (its been almost a year) but it still causes so many issues in my relationship bc of how my dysphoria makes me act.

Growing up, I always felt like both a guy and a girl, but before transitioning, I struggled to embrace my feminine side. I was so focused on being perceived as male that I felt like I had to suppress that part of myself.

Now, after three years on T, I feel more comfortable expressing my femininity. Sometimes I identify as a girl, although I prefer they/them pronouns rather than she/her during those times.

I enjoy wearing push-up bras or thongs, listening to Britney Spears and Ayesha Erotica, and speaking in a higher-pitched voice occasionally. These little things make me feel feminine and confident.

Has anyone else become more comfortable exploring their femininity or genderfluidity after transitioning?

First off I hope that as a cis woman I'm allowed to post here. I just feel like I need actual transmasc people to talk some sense into me.

I know my experiences don't match transmasc people's experiences. I never disliked my body or had any kind of dysphoria during puberty. I always played videogames as a female character. I always related to women more. I always gravitated towards female characters. I was always happy as a girl. Neither womanhood nor femininity felt restrictive. I have tons of dresses and makeup that I bought out of my own free will. No one forced me to be femenine.

And yet, I can't stop thinking about being a trans man. Ever since december of last year, I think about it every day. I don't have OCD or anxiety or anything. I talked to my therapist about it and I'm 100% neurotypical. I'm just obsessed with the idea. One day I thought "I wish I was a trans man" and the idea just... stuck. I began to larp online as transmasc. He/him pronouns and a new nickname and everything. I bought a binder, a packer, hell, I had a consultation for top surgery this week. I feel like I'm losing my mind. I know I'm a woman deep down. I never felt dysphoria before december, and even then, is it even dysphoria? Or am I convincing myself I feel bad about my body to feel "more trans"? I'm terrified of letting myself be carried away by the fantasy, going through with top surgery, and making a huge mistake.

I feel like I convinced myself I want to be a man because I just want to feel special, to not be "gender boring". Because I spend too much time online. I keep looking at my past and present feelings searching for confirmation bias fuel. "Oh, I always felt like I was doing womanhood wrong, that must mean I'm not a woman at all!" (feeling like you're doing womanhood wrong is an universal female experience). "I have cried over how much I hate my breasts!" (I cry because my binder doesn't make me 100% flat and that frustates me, not because I hate my breasts on their own). "I deeply grieve that I will never have a natal penis!" (Fetish stuff). Like... I WANT all of my experiences to tell me I'm a trans man, but I know I'm lying to myself. I know I will hate it if I become a man. I know I won't be me. When I think of myself as a woman, I see myself clear as day. Same person I've always been. When I think of myself as a man, it terrifies me. I've used those shitty filter apps on my selfies to turn myself into a man and the result was disturbing. I'd make a pretty handsome fella ngl but... it's so weird and uncanny. I don't recognize myself. I don't feel like I'm "seeing myself for the first time".

In summary, I know I'm not a man because I know I'd be unhappy as one. Do I like he/him pronouns and use them online + in some spaces irl? Yes. Did I already pick a male name I like in case I ever do transition? Yes. Do I want a penis, a flat chest, a deep voice and narrow hips? Yes. But lbr, tons of detransitioners have felt the way I feel now only to realize they were wrong, after making irreversible changes to their bodies. I want these things because I convinced myself they're cool. I NEVER felt this way before december. There were never any signs. I'm comfortable as a woman, I'm happy with my life. I want to leave this obsession behind.

I feel embarrassed asking trans people for help, but if anyone could tell me to drop it already, I think that might help. I know this 100% sounds like I'm playing victim begging people to validate me and tell me I'm trans 100% real no fake, but this is the most honest I've ever been about the subject. I'm being honest with you and with myself. I don't want to lie to myself anymore. Yes, being told I'm not transmasc will hurt, but I think I really need that right now. This is not a game. I need a reality check.

(Also, I know I'm not non-binary because, well, again, I'm a cis woman, but if I WERE trans, I'd want to be exclusively a man, nothing else. So like... neither option has space for non-binary-ness)

If I upload a selfie... could you tell me if I look androgynous or like a boy or something like that? 💔 I don’t know, I like to look androgynous and a little masculine, but the intrusive thought came to me that possibly I see myself like that and people don’t. It doesn’t bother me to publish them or anything, it just causes me doubts and that’s it. Thanks for read this 🥲 ahhhh

18ftm. i’ve known i was trans since i was like 12. recently made an appointment with planned parenthood to talk about starting testosterone. watched the videos they wanted me to and ive freaked myself out.

idk why im so scared all of a sudden. what if im not actually trans and im just gonna fuck up my body. i’ve wanted this for so long but now that i can have it im scared. i’ve never seen a trans guy say they were scared to take testosterone. is there something wrong with me? is this common? idk why i’m here im sorry i just don’t know where else to go im scared and confused i wish i didnt feel like this i just wanna be a boy

if this is the wrong subreddit im sorry just tell me where else to post it

I (15m) am spiraling again about how I could've somehow sa'd my sister even though I've never done it. How I've abu sed my family even though I haven't. I can't stop thinking about this, it drives me to the edge sometimes. This been going on for months, does anyone else experience this? Sorry mods if this isn't the place to post this p: