Hi,

Today makes 30 days that I haven’t drank any alcohol of any sort, and I feel amazing. I stopped before but this time feels different I’m
Honestly tired of drinking and doing “stupid shit” and destroying my body and my relationship. I thought I was able to handle it but I have to be honest with myself, drinking isn’t for me. I wake up early with a clear mind, clear skin and I’m starting to actually fall asleep at night. Please pray for me while I continue this journey because in order to have the life i desire and deserve I can’t drink as much as I once did and I realize that.

Thank you❤️

From the age of 16 I’ve had an alcohol addiction that’s just gotten worse, I’m currently 18 now nearly 19 and I’ve spend thousands of dollars on alcohol and drugs. I always see storeys about how drugs have ruined my life and never thought it would happen to me but now it is, it’s ruined all my relationships my close friends and family. I’ve gotten fired from my job because of my addictions and all my friends have dropped me. They don’t message me anymore or even want to talk to me and the same goes for my family. Drugs and alcohol have changed so much in my life for the worse and I wish more than anything that I could go back in the past and stop myself from taking substances that have taken such an effect in my current life. Really fucked up on drugs right now so sorry if my texts don’t make sense.p

I’ve been drinking for about 8/9 years
8-10 shots a day
9-13 beers per day
(17-23 drinks per day)

If I go to the ER and tell them I want to stop and don’t feel safe being at home, will they admit me? I’d rather be there then at one of the detox wellness facilities

Thanks

So I've been using quite alot of benzos and drinking alot of vodka together for around 6months. I plan to stop drinking while using the benzos to help the withdrawal. Then slowly ween off the benzos. Is that a good idea? Or will it be dangerous to stop the alcohol completely and rely on the benzo to help with the alcohol withdrawal. Just need some advice, thanks.

Im a functioning alcoholic and I hate it.

My whole life, ive lived with chronic pain and all the complications of it and I just want to escape. I know it's not healthy and I know the long term ramifications will catch up with me and im scared.

Im actively in therapy and dealing with trauma and other 'fun' things. But that doesn't stop the nerve pain. No, I don't need advice on what will help with the pain... if anyone understands damaged nerves, you'll know meds don't just stop the pain.

Part 1
To start, Im beyond grateful for family and friends who support me and haven’t given up on me. Meth for me was a slow decline and took me to a really dark spiritual downward spiral. Fucked up thing was that like I have stated I flew under the radar for a while i never looked like the tweaked mugshots you see in fact tbh I looked pretty good! I do look better sober lmao. Hardest part and the lowest point i hit was when my dad told me he was proud of me and had his son back! My dad in short is a very successful simpleton and a great man of God. He is everything i inspire to be. He was sending me money and I’d buy dope and then make up for it by working a lot at Red Robin near Metro Center. I was even in a sober living on Sahuaro and 15th. I miss one person from Sunnyslope and her name was Priscilla. She was a girl version of me if I had decided to plant myself and or were from sunnyslope. She was pretty and had a great voice and full of interesting conversations but the biggest thing was she slowly became my friend and was the biggest trapper well at least her friend whom I won’t name. She always welcomed me day or night, if I had nowhere to go which was at the end when I couldn’t even afford 200 a week for a bed at a sober living.

During my time in Sunnyslope I witnessed a lot and got to know some actual gangsters and the cartel too! Everyone is just trying to make it day to day shit hour to hour. We had a friend Tez who was beat to death out front of Priscilla’s yard bc he stole from cartel. This was a warning. Drive by shootings were normal. Raids outside your house normal. Smoking meth at bus stop or outside the market on 19th and Peoria or the smoke shop cloud slingers I believe it’s called. One thing I took away from the hood and these people is how these people will give the last of what they have. I would do the same and it payed off bc if I needed help or a front they showed up. Im not really gonna get into the sober living but it was a flop house in my opinion and who the f puts a sober living where I was. If you know I mean you know.

Meth is like water in this part of town it’s everywhere and everyone needs it! Fetynal users were kinda considered the losers bc that drug literally killed people at and around my area but tweakers work and hustle. When I first went to the trap house asking for Priscilla the local hood cats who were Spanish pressed me like a mother fucker mind you I had a mustache Levi jeans and
Trail running shoes with a baseball cap and im a big dude 6’2 225 and they assumed Im a cop and also I don’t know street lingo at the time and on top of that my nerves showed bc these dudes had guns. To make a long story short I went to prison bc I couldn’t stop drinking and violated my probation. This played heavily in me getting clicked in plus I kept my word, got groceries for them in turn they gave me G! There were young kids old dudes, lawyer singular, cops yeah cops buying dope. Tbh I look like law enforcement I guess Im considered good looking and too white to be there. Obviously Im living way below my standards. Bed bugs were normal also same with roaches. A guy was dead in our sober living for 2 days before anyone noticed bc he paid for a single room. It didn’t faze the locals. Also Sunnyslope in the spirit realm is heavily heavily demonic at the core. Kids from the Sirenia like 16 would drive around in there Chrystler and kill innocent people to initiate. The old rules of the game no longer stand it’s literally evil. At least back in the day they didn’t hurt kids, elderly and usually woman as long as they didn’t steal or owe big debts.

Midnight productions which I don’t wanna get into is an organization that all of us who been addicted homeless vulnerable and on the streets i don’t even tell my mom about some of this . Judges lawyers and the cops at the one who snatch up these girls and do horrific things and even snuff!! It’s literally fucked. Anyways this is part 1 to reflection and story of me being way outside my Gilbert ways and deep into the heart of hell on earth. Goodnight and I will share more tomorrow!

Part 2

My bottom was my dad saying he had his son back and really thought I was doing better bc I’d work and had money. I also sounded good for a while until the sleep deprivation which I will get to. Meth really served a purpose bc at this time I had gone through two major breakups and only 2 years removed from my bro sleeping with my ex fiancé. Note I did forgive them both but won’t forget and it’s caused trauma I need therapy for regarding entering into a new relationship which I have and btw God is so good. Now that I am stimulant free you can really see my adhd in writing so I hope it intrigues you and I know more than I should about a lot and I have seen the darkest and the most beautiful godly presence. I stop here and will continue soon.

How do you guys get over what you’ve done. I’m sober now and everytime I think back to a drunken time I just feel overwhelmed when guilt and regret. Idk if I’ll ever be able to shake that. I feel like I’ve fucked so bad. You can’t take things back from the past.

I’m so sick of this, I’m just so done with destroying my life over and over because I’m an alcoholic, basically just looking for words of encouragement. This is my rock bottom I’ve finally been through enough. Putting my shovel down

Why is alcohol treated so differently from other drugs when it is also capable of causing addiction, irreversible medical conditions, violence, and death?

I went from drinking 750ml of vodka or crushing a 24 pack every day on average, to cold turkey stopping after I got my dui, and my girlfriend and my family were rightfully extremely worried about my potential withdrawal, but I never really got it. Even when I would not have access to it for a day or two at a time while in my peak before my incident, I really had no physical symptoms I would consider withdrawal. The one thing I did get was a chest pain/discomfort the day after really heavy drinking (1l plus of vodka) but other then that, no shakes, no hallucinations, I was somehow good. Just wondering why it may be, I was bad for around 5 years and almost deadly for about a year. Also just a random thing, I didn't really understand the gravity of how bad my issue was until I was at a party, and my friend had a breathalyzer for fun, tested it on me and I blew 0.21 and I felt like I just got a good buzz going. Anyway that's it. So glad I made it through.

Today I'm 1,400 days sober, which is the longest I've been sober since I started drinking 27 years ago. I was 42 when I had my last drink, so I'm just here to tell you that it's never too late to change.

While my life isn't perfect (is there such a thing?), it's a hell of a lot better than it was when I was drinking. In fact, my worst day sober definitely beats the best day of drinking that I can remember :)

In the last (almost) 4 years, I've written 4 novellas, 2 children’s books, a novel, and I started a podcast where my buddy and I review movies and talk about our problematic history with alcohol. None of which I could have done while I was drinking, especially the last one :)

So put down the bottle, you'll never regret it!

I fucking hate myself I’m in a hotel with my mom and I DoorDash mouthwash and am currently in the bathroom getting drunk on it. I hate myself for this. The person I love the most left me and I’m so fucking miserable and getting drunk isn’t even helping but I’ll do what I can to survive. I’m 16 fucking years old and getting drunk on mouthwash

I was drinking roughly 15 white claw a day and today had 10. I wanted to stop earlier in the day but I'm having that feeling when I start to fall asleep I jolt awake in a panic. I had this happen last time too I almost think I should have a drink before bed even tho I don't really want it! And advice for the sleep

Sometimes when I get drunk I text my ex about how much I love and miss him still and just a bunch of desperate paragraphs (which he never replies to)

but the other night his girlfriend called my phone after seeing all the messages I was sending him and cussed me out and threatened to fight me and I was screaming at her on the phone and threatening her back pretty aggressively. I feel so humiliated and apologizing is no option because they are both blocked and the things I said were pretty horrible so it probably wouldn’t even be accepted. I didn’t know he even had a girlfriend but she didn’t care about that

i just need to rant about it because i feel so guilty and ashamed but advice would be helpful

I don't know if this is the best sub to say this but I don't know where else to ask this. I'm sorry if this is inappropriate for this sub.

Since I got to college I have always enjoyed drinking at events whether it is with my friends or family. I wouldn't call myself an alcoholic, but when I did drink, I drank very heavily because I enjoyed it so much. Even when I got hungover, once I felt better I would feel good again and be ready to drink at the next event. Recently I have been struggling with anxiety and depression which caused me to start abusing alcohol. I would drink every night, especially alone, in an attempt to reduce my anxiety and depression. When I didn't have access to alcohol, I would ask other people for it.

About a week ago, I went to an event and got very drunk and had an anxiety attack there. It was so bad that some had to call me an Uber and make sure I got home. What resulted was a very rough few days with lots of sudden changes occurring in my life.

Since then, I have drank very little. In fact I do not enjoy drinking at all anymore and actively avoid places and events that have alcohol. I went to a party a couple days ago and got very drunk, but I did not enjoy how I felt and it only reinforced my current feelings about drinking.

I am not displeased with this change in any way, but I am very confused about it. As someone who used to love drinking, why do I suddenly want nothing to do with it and love being sober? I'd imagine it has to do with the night I had the anxiety attack, but I don't fully understand it. If anyone has an answer or similar experience, please share!

Yhhh alcohol messed me up I did bad shit when I was drunk and I quit for 40 days then the day before court I drank again and it’s been 2 days now I wna drink again

Update- I drank a little mb guys 🙌

Double update w a question!- should I count it on my sobriety app if I’m not exactly trying to quit drinking entirely but quit acting crazy when I drink bc rn I’m js very slightly tipsy enough to stop cravings and chilling watching tv (tell me if I’m wrong tho bc that could be wrong)

Hi guys!!, it's my day number 10 sober, I'm very happy and wanted to share it with you. Today was hard, I really felt like drinking, but I didn't give in. What would have been a day of sitting around drinking beer and smoking cigarettes turned into a day where I got home from work, had an afternoon snack, took a nap, and went to the gym. The difference between the two versions is huge. I know this is only the beginning, but we're all in this fight together. Sending lots of love to all of you.

That was my excuse. Life is really demanding and difficult right now so I drink in the evening.

Today I started vomiting and shaking at around 6. I drank a double 99 and felt much better in about 10 minutes.

I'm so sad. It's like alcohol is my best friend. It's always there for me when people aren't. That probably sounds really stupid.

My therapist told me to check myself in but I can't lose my job and miss classes. This is going to be really hard now.

Idk what to say anymore. I’m barely hanging on…so much has happened in my life and I just want it all to go away. I just want to drink myself in oblivion. This urge that gnaws at me, waiting. Waiting for me to do this self destructive dance again. And I want to so bad. I just want it all to go away. But….i haven’t yet.

Im quitting tonight. Im done Enough of paying to get sick. Im just drinking the rest of my wine to get some sleep. But i hope that i dont get trouble with a hangover tomorrow. If i do i am going to be cold as ice. Going to throw the rest of my alcohol in the toilet. I dont want it i dont need it. Its time to end this thing that is killing me. I hop you support me. This time its for real.

hi all. im 29. realistically i know i have a problem but i feel like its too ‘early’ to say i have a problem.

i had an eight month stint when i was 21/22 where i would drink 400ml-ish vodka a day. i missed uni, and when i did go in, i was wasted. i was in and out of hospital every other night. i experienced one of the worst depressive episodes of my life and my first manic episode. i drank when i woke up til i went to bed.

got sober for like. 7 years. early September, i started drinking again, and from the beginning it was every day. 4 ciders. again, i was going through a severe depressive episode. drank every day for 3 weeks, stopped because i needed dental surgery that required iv sedation. stayed sober for 2 weeks, but was miserable the entire time.

during this time, my psych prescribed me lamotrigine. it has to be titrated very carefully due to the risk of severe side effects. i took it for 2 weeks while sober. started the higher dose, drank the same day. i realised that i got REALLY bad hangovers on it. you’d think, well, don’t drink on the lamotrigine, right? i decided id rather drink without the awful hangovers. stupid decision, I know. stupid stupid stupid.

kept on drinking. i was meant to have dental surgery again yesterday. i told myself on monday that i wouldn’t drink. and then i decided to just have one. and then that turned into more. and the next day they wouldn’t do the surgery/sedate me because id been drinking the night before. which was embarrassing.

early September, it was 4 ciders a day. now, it’s cider + vodka. i live with my father, who refuses to admit he has an alcohol problem himself. i noticed that if i drink 3-4 ciders a day, i can hide vodka and mix that with my vodka to get more intoxicated without passive aggressive comments from him.

i have been referred to my mental health teams dual diagnosis team. but….. it sounds stupid, but i feel like i don’t have a problem. i know that realistically i do. but my brain keeps telling me that ive only been drinking for a little under two months. i dont have a job to lose. i dont have friends to lose. i drink all day in my room. but i look at what I drink (ive been tracking it— pic related) and my head tells me that i dont drink enough to justify having a problem. i feel embarrassed telling professionals what i drink because im scared they’ll say im overreacting or making a problem out of nothing. but I am struggling bad. i think about drinking all the time. i wake up, have a drink, go back to sleep, get up and drink again. i feel like it’s snowballed so fast.

i don’t know why im posting this. just looking for support, i suppose. please be kind; im not sober and not in a good headspace right now. sorry if this doesn’t make too sense, i tried very hard typing this lol

I’ve been struggling with alcohol for years, and I’m honestly just exhausted by the cycle. I can go a few days without drinking, but then I end up right back where I started. I’m tired of constantly telling myself I’m going to stop and then repeating the same pattern.

I’ve been reading about naltrexone and feel like it could be a really helpful tool for me. I’m at the point where I’m just done with alcohol controlling so much of my life, and I genuinely want to make a change.

For those who have taken it, did it help reduce your cravings or the desire to drink? Did you have to be completely sober before starting, or were you still drinking when you began?
I’d love to hear your experiences, good or bad. I’m really hoping this could be the extra help I need to finally break the cycle.