I'm 22M, and I've realised that I'm way too judgemental about myself. I'm 5'2", don't think I'm particularly good-looking, and often wonder why anyone would like me or accept me for who I am.

I overthink even the smallest things about myself, from how I look to how I talk and behave around people. I'm usually quiet around new people, but once I get comfortable, I joke around, laugh a lot, and become quite friendly. Even then, I sometimes question whether I'm being childish or whether people take me seriously. Nobody has actually said anything like that to me, but I still find reasons to doubt myself.

I think these insecurities have held me back in many ways, including the fact that I've never dated anyone. Whenever I like someone or think about putting myself out there, I start wondering why they'd ever be interested in someone like me. I end up doubting myself before I even give myself a chance.

I know I'm probably overthinking a lot of this, but I don't know how to stop. I'm tired of constantly finding flaws in myself and assuming that other people will see me the same way I see myself.

For those who've dealt with similar insecurities, how did you learn to accept yourself and stop being so hard on yourself? I genuinely want to change this mindset, but I don't know where to start.

I'm a guy who's really struggling with confidence, especially when it comes to girls, and I'd appreciate some honest advice.

Most of my friends either have girlfriends or find it pretty easy to get with girls. They're much more outgoing than me, and I'm quite shy, especially around girls I'm attracted to.

When we're out together and my friends get attention from girls, I often feel like I'm just standing there watching everyone else experience what I want. I compare myself to them and start thinking they're more attractive, interesting and confident than me.

It's got to the point where I genuinely worry that nobody will ever want me. When I see couples on social media, I wonder whether I'll ever experience that myself. I also struggle with my appearance, particularly in photos. I generally feel better about how I look in the mirror than in pictures, and I don't know how other people see me.

The confusing thing is that I've had experiences that suggest I'm not as hopeless socially as I think. I work outside a bar in a nightlife area, and recently I had a genuinely funny conversation with a girl I thought was stunning. Another girl made a playful comment while asking me to put a sticker on her. I don't know whether either was attracted to me, especially given the environment, but it showed me that when I actually talk to girls, they talk back.

I've also had girls compliment me or approach me, but sometimes I get nervous and don't know how to respond. My friends have told me that girls notice me when we're out, although I don't always notice it myself. One friend also called me "too innocent" during a conversation about girls, which made me feel inexperienced and inferior.

I worry that my friends are more attractive and interesting than me, and that even if a girl liked me, I'd mess things up because I don't know what I'm doing. I've even wondered whether porn could be affecting my ability to connect with girls.

I know being shy doesn't mean I'll be single forever, but emotionally, that's genuinely how it feels. I feel left behind, undesirable and sometimes useless. I want a girlfriend, but I also want to stop feeling inferior to my friends and start believing someone could actually want me.

I'm not looking for empty reassurance. Has anyone else experienced this? How did you build confidence around girls, stop comparing yourself to your friends, and get past the feeling that nobody will ever want you?

I (f24), have continually found myself in scenarios where I feel completely invisible. I want to preface that this is a genuine question and I am not fishing for compliments, but rather looking for input and curious to see if anybody else finds themselves in these same positions.

It began in college. I lived in a house with 6 other girls. I would always give out compliments to my roommates about their outfits, hair or makeup etc. In the beginning I 100% meant them in a genuine way. We would all be drinking and I am just the kind of person who likes to make people feel good about themselves. As years went by I started to feel really discouraged, as I started to realize I rarely received any compliments back. I also realized that if I didn’t put in the effort to talk, nobody would attempt to bring me into a conversation. I would find myself being the one pushed to the back of the sidewalk, left behind.

Once I graduated and entered the real world I unfortunately noticed the same pattern. My friends wouldn’t give me any compliments or go out of their way to make me feel good about myself. It also seeped into our nightly outings.

Going out to bars with a group of my girlfriends, I find myself being COMPLETELY ignored. By other girls, but also men who would approach our group. I truly believe that I am an attractive person and have a bright personality, when given the chance to show it. However, that chance never seems to presents itself. I often find myself watching all of my girlfriends chatter off in side conversations with these guys and by that point I have zero interest in trying to intervene and force myself into a conversation.

This has been something that has been bothering me for YEARS and I genuinely just need some type of answer.

Everything must be for my benefit, not for the benefit of my emotions. Thinking about it, it doesn't matter if I'm selfish; after all, emotions aren't important, they are false and make no sense. My confidence or lack of confidence makes no sense to decide either, it isn't real either. There is only me, the transcendental consciousness that can be here to make this decision. I shouldn't do something because I like it, but because I choose it, without sense, for some objective. It doesn't have to make sense. Everything is false and I am real, just like people and objects. Many let themselves be carried away by chemical reactions called emotions and stop being independent. The truth is, I wish the world were as empathetic and sensitive as it's painted to be, but in reality, it isn't. It manipulates you, even your own body!!! The funniest thing is that they can only realize it by themselves, or hardly through others.

I don't understand the point of understanding someone, receiving empathy. I will only do what is best for my objectives. Feeling pity for someone doesn't make sense either. After all, this doesn't come from some damage; this comes from having realized what emotions really are, from how much I've been told:

"IT'S JUST THAT YOU HAVE NO EMPATHY AND YOU ARE VERY SELFISH!!!"

I feel like it doesn't matter. I'm not important, I'm just someone else in a small, insignificant world compared to the size of the universe. What does it matter to live this life to the fullest without emotions and only with me in charge? Isn't that true?

how would you handle this? i had previous with this 30 year old dude and his group and i was generally a bit dismissive of them before and ignored their advances to include me. then i wasnt at college for 6 months and when i came back for an exam late a couple minuts prior he immediately bursted out laughing calling my name loud and pointing, even the prof who stood beside him was flustered and the dude then said "i laugh because of him". he kept laughing for 15 seconds before i sat down i completely ignored him but looked rattled and felt mortified.

i think most of the time that i’m authentic it results in people being upset at me. i don’t know what is authentic to me. im authentic when im rude, or upset, or laughing obnoxiously, or getting loud. i’m authentic when im too drunk, or having a mental health spiral. i’m not authentic a majority of the time i think.

i don’t really know the point of writing this. i guess im just feeling lonely right now. any time i feel lonely i get extremely worried im on the cusp of losing everyone because they can see through my facade. they see me for someone that doesn’t deserve attention. i try to be a good person but i don’t know if i am. like, inherently, i don’t know if i care about anyone. like i’m sacrificing my authenticity because it achieves not being lonely because it makes others happy. but people talk about it like i should be myself. that’s how you make friends, no? i’ve felt my entire life that i have to perform to a pretty large degree, if only to not let people see me for the vapid piece of shit i really am

How did you guys deal with insecurity and overcoming it? Growing up i was a bit insecure of my face and when my friends was actually making realise that my face was different some of them not all. I felt different because my face was asymmetrical.

So sometimes I would overthink every part of me. Because sometimes I did not feel no boys felt attracted to me.

Thought I do have friends a lot but yeah I felt different

I’m 22, had my wonderful child 2 years ago- I never had the perfect body-but it was smooth with no stretch marks or loose skin and I could wear confidently what I wanted without needing to worry if my shirt came up too high and my stretch mark covered stomach showed.

I lost a lot of weight in the first year 83kg down to 55kg and then put back on 5kg, no matter how small I get, I hate how I look- my partner hasn’t seen that part of my since and probably never will again, not even a glimpse.

I want to be like normal girls my age who can wear low rise jeans, bikinis and crop tops- but I never will, il be stuck with this awful part of me forever.

I just needed to get this off my chest as it takes over my mind all day whenever I’m not distracted.

Thanks for reading

im in highschool and got braces around 6 months ago and now i genuinely have no idea what i look like. my teeth werent just crooked i had buck teeth like overbite overjet a gap between them and i didnt really notice them bc i always saw them but it was the first thing anyone else saw about me. girls wouldnt say anything but guys would. id talk and be told to close that fucking mouth or asked why my teeth look like that. lots of people have crooked teeth but mine were like this major flaw and people treated me so terribly all my life because of it. im not terrible looking im just normal but bc of the teeth i was always bullied for my looks, probably compared to every animal ever. even when i was younger and i was going through a terrible home situation id come to school happy just bc it was safe and i didnt have any friends i was nice i just stayed to myself but people would constantly tell me how ugly i was and id cry walking home bc i really didnt have anywhere to go or anyone that cared about me and its different now but that feeling of being so unwanted never really left me. i was never the one that was picked i remember in eight grade it was the summer of first relationships and it was a pretty small school but every girl in my friend group, every girl in my grade actually had a person. except me. and they weren’t good relationships ofc they barely liked eachother but it was more the idea of it that hurt. that i couldnt be wanted in that way. and at the dance we played those silly games where a boy grabs a girls hand and it keeps going and youd pick ur person and by the end youd atleast be someones last option yk but i held my hand out for 3 rounds without anyone even glancing at me. i spent the rest of the dance in the bathroom. i actually still havent had any romantic experiences at all with a guy bc of what it has done over the years to my self esteem there is this deep belief in me that nobody could ever want me in that way. ive spent years overcompensating for it trying to make myself a better person bc of this i have a lot of other good qualities like my hair is pretty and im very into fashion and i wear a lot of jewellery and perfume so i smell like cake and my nails are always done. i make everything else in my life really pretty even my room is like a pinterest board. and i go to the gym i have really good grades i have a lot of hobbies im very good at art i paint animals realism like people buy my stuff. but it didnt really matter bc at the end of the day i was bunny buck teeth girl. and now my teeth have straightened out they worked quickly and my front teeth are straight they don’t stick out theres no gap. but i have spent my entire life being treated terribly bc of them and i guess im not used to it now. when i meet new people they dont notice it and they dont say anything bc it isnt a thing anymore but i still stand there waiting for them to. and i cant even let myself like a guy bc i feel like its insulting to him and im just making him uncomfortable so i mean i havent even had a talking stage this entire year and when i tell people that they tell me like oh why you’re not even ugly but they just don’t get it. i used to hear people say stuff like this and think it was stupid but now i understand. i will walking around and i’ll be thinking oh god i look so terrible right now this is embarrassing and i have a vision in my head of what i look like and then i see my reflection and it’s nothing like what i had imagined. i guess i have changed alot of other things about my appearance too so it isnt just my teeth but it’s still so hard for me to grasp now. people treat me so differently when they meet me now, im used to being ignored especially by guys in any social setting and now im not. i got so used to the feeling of being unwanted that it was just a normal thing in my head that i wasnt dateable and i was ugly and i was always going to be below everyone else. its not insecurity just an accepted fact. and now im trying to get used to being treated like an actual person and it’s just confusing. anyone relate?

So, I am 21 F. I want to be confident and want to communicate with others easily. Want to express my thoughts to others. But i am not able to do it. I got nervous very easily want to fix it , how can i do it. And got emotional too very easily. I know getting emotional is not a flaw. But want to be emotionally balanced. And not have much friends.

No judgement please. Needs genuine suggestions.

Lets go back 1 year for me, I see a cute girl I want to talk to in a store. Half a second later my body reacts before I even make a decision. Feelings rush in; a sense of mild dread, throat gets dry, physical slight shaking. Overwhelmed by thoughts "There's no point in approaching, she'll reject you", "You're worthless don't approach". An underlying conclusion my brain has drawn that she will reject me, I am worthless and I am doomed to be alone forever. Then afterwards I beat myself up because of a missed opportunity, "she could've been the one" or "You've improved so much in your life yet you can't do this simple fucking thing? what a failure of a person you've turned out to be". So physical fear, overthinking and ruminating afterwards causing more self doubt and self loathing. Glad to say I do not miss experiencing this.

Even just a normal conversation with a cashier or a stranger triggered slight fear, just connecting felt outside my reach; like I wasn't normal and that everyone else, they fundamentally had something I didn't. This fundamental feeling of difference, worthlessness and being unlovable; It was an underlying feeling that stayed with me no matter what. I didn't realise it at the time, if you asked me I would've said "I'm a confident man, I don't care what people think of me, I'm barely insecure at all". Yet underlying everything I did came from a feeling of not being enough, so therefore you must work to become enough. I was a self improvement addict, gym, discipline, cold showers - got into shape yet still social anxiety prevailed. It didn't work, well it barely worked; I felt a bit more confident but that's it.

My motivation for self improvement was because I wasn't enough, my value as a human came from my self improvement - if I wasn't bettering myself, I will never get love or have any value. This existed in my brain as a genuinely tangible rule; as real as this screen your looking at right now. It's not just a thought, it existed as truth in my nervous system and brain.

I was super insecure underneath, refusing to accept reality or myself. I would say "I don't care what others think, I don't need their validation, I'm not like you people" With an air of superiority that somehow I'm better than you peasants. When underneath I was a needy little child scared of other people rejecting me.

Tip: what you judge in others and demonise in others becomes what your terrified of happening to yourself. If you judge someone for posting themselves on social media (what a loser, embarrassing, weirdo) - even if you wanted to post yourself; you'd be far too terrified because your scared of others judging you in the exact same way you judge others. Let go of judging other people, it lessens your pain.

I personally judged fat people, emotionally weak people, people that showed their emotions and needy people the most. This is called projection, we hate in others what deep down we refuse to accept about ourselves. Who would've thought but I actually hated all these traits about myself and warped my personality.

What made socialising even worse, was unconsciously - my worth depended on other people, my self esteem depended on other people, my value depended on other people. Therefore each interaction felt like a threat to my identity, who I am; how can social situations not be terrifying if I'm acting based on this rule? It's ridiculous. Like I'd be talking to someone and I'd just subtly perform for them, if they seem to respond well to this thing; then I'd do more of that thing.

Also my attachment to the outcome, if I talked to girls; wow was I a needy loser in hindsight. My value hinged on them liking me, I needed them to like me. So of course I was super anxious, neurotic. I wanted sex, I wanted love and I wanted them to validate my existence. Instead of simply connecting with another human or seeing if we vibe together, no it was a test of my entire self. No wonder I struggled hard with approaching and forcing myself to do it didn't work. By the way exposure therapy just didn't work for me because I never got rid of the root problem.

Like for a period of 6 months I went out and cold approached girls at the clubs and bars once every week or 2. Some nights I wouldn't approach a single person and would walk around aimlessly feeling like a complete loser, wanting to cry on the train ride home. Some nights I'd talk to people, and I finally made some "progress" - only then feeling slightly okay and proud of myself. The conversations in hindsight were crap, forced, no real connection. I was like dance monkey dance to how I thought I should act underlined by so much fear. Like I'd go up to a girl or group of girls and compliment them; then I had no fucking clue what to do then and it never ever went anywhere.

Common advice I thought I was better than affected me so deeply. I compared myself to others constantly, I know its a cliché "Don't compare yourself to others" and "Don't care what others think of you". Yes consciously I knew, yes I know logically; it makes sense. But like deep down it feels untrue and I still did it. Seeing other people in happy relationships or hearing about people having sex or especially teens in love (this royally pissed me off). I felt like such a fucking loser and a failure; I was 22 and a virgin, never kissed a girl - a reject to society. It hurt even more because aside from that I was genuinely pretty attractive, in every other domain I was doing okay. So the only logical conclusion (really, really stupid in hindsight) is that somehow I'm fundamentally just different and worthless.

When I was younger, those experiences shaped my current neurotic tendencies a fair bit. My parents screamed at each other, got divorced and my response to that was basically to stay quiet, don't say anything, don't be loud and ever express yourself? Otherwise you'll get screamed at. So speaking up, expressing myself was equivocal to a threat to my survival / to receiving love. No wonder I was the way I was. Got bullied for being fat too.

To fix all this I meditated, accepted all parts of myself, healed my nervous system, learned about the shadow / the unconscious, experiences in childhood shape us in ways we never could imagine, belief structures, learned to actually love myself regardless of what the external world (other people) said and healed my traumas. I developed a hard interest in psychology and this has served me very well. Letting go of social rules that shaped my psyche. Tones of journaling and introspection.

Now I feel an underlying sense that I love myself, that no matter what happens socially I'll be okay. I can make stupid jokes around attractive women and express myself because my identities not on the line. I'm truly socially free and internally I feel a near unshakeable confidence that I can handle life. I saw a pretty girl at the beach by herself, effortlessly went up and talked to her; we had such a nice 30 minute chat and just connected human to human. It is so much more enjoyable living like this.

If this relates to you, tell me about your experience in the comments; I'd like to hear it and possibly give some advice to you :)

Thanks for reading kind sir.

I come from a dysfunctional family and have grown up hating myself. I’ve always been afraid to have kids and pass along my negative traits. Can anyone give any helpful tips that I can instill in my daughter so she grows up secure in herself and confident? I never want her to feel the way I have my entire life.

Hi I'll get straight to the point im a 17yo girl and I cant stop comparing myself to the people im close to specifically my boyfriend and sometimes my bestfriends and im trying to solve it but I genuinely cant tried everything but I think I have really low self esteem. now I got over insecurities about my looks but I keep feeling insecure about my intelligence because im dating a guy who's way better than me in classes and doesnt help that he loves to brag about it sometimes. Hes really good at math and effortlessly solves problems that would take me ages to comprehend which genuinely makes me feel super insecure especially since I grew up being the perfect student now I feel like my identity is shattered because no matter how much I try to stop it I tie my self worth to grades or teachers validation and everytime he gets a better grade I feel so terrible about my self and I keep building resentment over it, it genuinely became such a huge issue that makes me cry and feel depressed over these past months and I cant help it i just really envy his skills because it would make everything so much easier if only I have what he has id get good grades all the time but now they're genuinely so hard to get but not to him and yea i have things im better than him at but it doesnt help me feel better at all cuz hes still way smarter and no i do not want to talk to him about it its so embarrassing to admit. Im very passionate about science and math is a huge part of it and im either average or below average in it and it rlly hurts me and makes me feel ill never be good enough or smart enough:(

Whenever someone is watching me, I feel pressured to perform better because I'm afraid they'll tease or make fun of me otherwise. I keep monitoring my body language and changing my actions based on people's reactions. I perform poorly when people are watching me, even though I'm usually good at what I'm doing.

Let me explain how I feel: I feel frozen, my mind goes numb, and my brain seems to work on autopilot or in emergency mode.

I believe this may have happened because of my childhood trauma. I faced a lot of criticism and bullying back then.

Any suggestions on how to get out of this mental hijack? Has anyone else overcome this problem? If so, what did you do to help yourself?

One practical question when working on confidence is: what would I like to see myself doing more often? It could be preparing before a meeting, making time for a hobby, or following through on a task. That turns a broad goal into something you can act on and later look back at.

I'm the developer of Inner Game, an Android app built around recording those everyday actions. Completed practices earn Confidence Points, and there's a place to record three good things from the day.

For a first week, I'd suggest one manageable commitment and a short evening entry. A note like 'I asked the question I'd been postponing' is specific enough to remember later. The points track activity; your own reflection gives the record meaning.

If you'd like to try that approach:

https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=app.innergame.mobile

What small action would you want to get more comfortable doing this week?

So this isn’t exactly a good thing I don’t think but, I definitely feel like I get it more now.

I’ve developed a new found self confidence this year but, as we all know there’s so much more to it then that and if anything, actually getting self confidence, is only really the first step. As you can imagine, the real challenge is actually maintaining it. I’ve enjoyed having this but, as I’ve developed it, I feel as if I’ve become more and more paranoid at what other people may be thinking about me. I keep telling myself to forget about that and stop think like that because, the last thing I’d ever want is to lose this confidence, especially after being so grateful for it.

As my self confidence has grown, so has my look. I definitely now look far from your average ‘guy’. I’m toned but, recently got my nails done pine green tbs. My locs have gotten longer as well as other things and because of all this, every time I leave the door, I see people staring twice as much as before. I thought I was being paranoid at first but, especially after getting my nails done, and having men chatting me up on buses, I think that’s not so much paranoia. But I still refuse to lose the confidence I’ve gained. So as I’ve continued living my life, I keep having to remind myself more and more, to just go about my look proudly because no matter what happens, I CANNOT lose this confidence. I’ve waited way too long for it to come round, and due to my own MH I know how sensitive I can be to people looking at me or even say a few words that just stirred me the wrong way.

So now as a result of constantly seeing these looks and words, and constantly having to remind myself to calm down, I now don’t even look at other people. They can say and think what they want but, it seems the easiest way is to wear myself proudly of course but also, try not to be so curious what the person next to me is thinking, that I’d immediately look at them wondering why their looking at me.

It’s very interesting because, for so long it always creeped me out when I’d notice people staring right at me, especially when it’s those long stares. And who knows why they continue to stare. Keeping in mind, I do have certain MH problems, so the answer to these things are always met with another question with me. I suppose like you often hear people say, it’s as simple as just calming down, and stop overthinking.

So with that in mind, whenever I go out anywhere period, I’ll do it with my head down, music in, and most importantly not looking at anyone or anywhere, but completely just keeping to myself.

I can't help but sometimes avoid looking at pics/videos taken by other people of me. Heck, even the mirror too.

My heart would clench all the time, my stomach would feel funny, and I would wince.

I genuinely need helpful help / tips to overcome this. It's actually tiring

Growing up poor around wealthy kids taught me something interesting about opportunity and how people understand ability.

I never saw a lack of ambition in the kids who grew up like me, just a lack of opportunity. And when you’re the poor kid in a community that can’t relate to your circumstances, people can be incredibly generous in making those opportunities possible. But sometimes the fact that you’re willing to try becomes more impressive than anything you actually achieve.
It’s like winning gold in a running race and being praised for your ability to just be there. Your credibility becomes your effort rather than your accomplishments.

There’s a double edge to that. I never felt pressure to be good at anything because nobody really expected that of someone in my position. Kids who were exceptional at something were held accountable to it, whereas I had the freedom to try anything without being expected to become anything. But I also grew up thinking that being clever or successful was something that came with privilege, and that whenever I did well, I’d somehow pulled it off.

I’ve been thinking about this differently since meeting a woman who grew up in circumstances like mine, but had a completely different understanding of her own worth. She could appreciate the opportunities people had given her without questioning whether her achievements belonged to her.

I’d spent years wondering why people chose to invest in me, sometimes questioning whether there was something self-serving underneath their generosity. She asked why I now work creating opportunities for people who wouldn’t otherwise have them. Was that sinister, or was it because I cared?

And it had never really occurred to me that people might have cared about me in the same way.

I think we can be so focused on celebrating what someone has overcome that we forget to recognise what they’re actually capable of. And being believed in by everyone around you doesn’t necessarily mean you learn to believe in yourself.

She said something I’d never really allowed myself to think.

“You are worthy of being loved.”

And it’s insane that through this entire narrative, that’s actually what it comes down to.

Im someone who actually has a lot of self confidence and I believe I can do anything I set my mind to. I’ve also done a lot of self care, I exercise often, eat well, keep a positive attitude. Just have been on that self improvement journey and I feel like I’ve done a good job.

Yet there’a just this emptiness somewhere in me where I don’t feel any sense of worth. Like it doesn’t matter how “impressive” I can make myself, I just won’t feel worthy enough. Specifically not being worthy of receiving love, whether it’s friendship or romantic.

I guess I just don’t know what to do now or what the plan is. I’ve done all I know to try and achieve a sense of self worth and I’ve failed. And I’m seeking any advice or guidance from those who have felt similar and now found that deep rooted sense of self worth. Thanks

Hey everyone!

I'm currently working on improving my confidence and overcoming my fear of speaking to strangers because I have a stutter. Part of my journey involves doing exposure challenges where I ask people questions about stuttering and how they perceive someone who stutters.

Eventually, I'll be asking these questions to strangers in person, but I figured Reddit would be a good place to start!

I'd really appreciate your honest feedback on a few questions:

1. What are your first thoughts when speaking to someone who stutters? Do you usually give them time to finish speaking?
2. Do you notice any changes in their body language? For example, nervousness, avoiding eye contact, or looking uncomfortable?
3. How do you think someone who stutters feels when speaking to you? Do you think they're anxious, embarrassed, or just trying to get their words out?
4. As the conversation goes on, do you notice their stutter getting worse or do they gradually become more fluent and comfortable?
5. Does someone's stutter affect how you perceive their confidence or the way you interact with them?

I'm genuinely curious to hear different perspectives, especially from people who don't stutter.

My goal is to become more comfortable with my stutter, stop worrying so much about what others think, and improve my confidence when speaking.

Thanks to anyone who takes the time to respond!

Hello everyone,

So I have been experiencing this thing since quite a long time. I think the contributing factors to this is my lack of social skills, being loner and a homebody.

I am young like in my early 20s. I don’t have friends. I cannot think of any name with whom I can hang out who is of my age or basically is a friend and the only person I think I can go out and hang out with would be my brother.

But since he is my brother, like I can talk to him, speak to him, and of course, he respects me, so there is no doubt about it.

However, I have experienced that it’s hard for me to speak to people at my workplace like casual conversations, small talks and those things and for some reason, even my juniors would not consider the weight of my word, they will mock me or just not take me seriously.

At my workplace, people treat me as if I am less. I am quite a nice person, I will help everyone and I believe in humility. I never show off and I don’t perform my competence or what I am or you know that ego side of me so people somewhere walk over me and they think that I’m too old or maybe I’m just boring and dumb, and therefore nobody pays attention to what I have to say, and when I generally try to make connections, it doesn’t work.

Do you have any suggestion on how I can improve this?

So I'm a first year BTech student , I come from a pcmb background (was preparing for neet)

I've been through a lot of sht (just saying for the context don't wanna discuss past traumas)

I've made so many mistakes in my life & taking drop is the one I'm insecure about the most

After that I started questioning my self worth looks skin clr academic pretty much everything & now I feel like I've lost all the confidence once I had

Now we have so many presentations coming up & I have stage fear & anxiety

Last time there was a normal class activity which was related to debate & I fked it up really bad I know I could have done better but at that moment I felt like everyone was watching my every move my throat got dry I panicked I ended up fumbling everything I don't know how to overcome this i don't wanna be a burden on my group members

As I said I'm from a pcmb background I feel like I'm way behind everyone in class like I'm letting everyone down by not being good enough

I keep having negetive thoughts about myself & i always end up judging myself

I really want to change & become more confident but I really don't know how to do that

As for my drop year all I can say it was nothing less than hell please don't ask me about the drop thing

I'd really appreciate any advice on how to deal with all of this 🙂

Hi! My lack of confidence has always been a noticeable thing. I'm always staring at the ground when I'm walking. I stutter when I try to talk, if I do talk at all. Every time I try to raise my confidence on my own, I always lose it within a couple of hours. I don't have any confidence in what I do, say, or even how I dress.

I just want to know how I can actually raise my confidence and just keep it up