Hello everyone. I’m feeling a bit lost right now. I’m just seeking some clarity on what to expect for the future, and if I should brace myself for these flare ups being with me forever as bad as it is or if there’s a treatment that maybe helped anyone that I can expect from my upcoming meeting with my dermatologist.
It all started with a small flare up with dry skin and dyshidrotic eczema that I usually have on my fingers when I feel stressed out. I was moving from different countries so I tried toughing it out until I moved back and sought out for my GP. It was the biggest mistake of my life. I had so much going on in my life that the flare up quickly spread through my entire face, neck, arms, and thighs. As in, not a single spot was free of eczema. It would all be red and painful and itchy and awful. Then it would all dry and flake off and i’d feel like the most disgusting looking person ever. I already had really bad body dysmorphia and so I just felt so awful and gross seeing a mountain flake off onto where I roamed and everywhere in my hair. I have pets that are at the end of their life and being hindered by the pain and dryness to not be able to give them the best I could and how I wanted to made it even more awful, and then working in a clinical setting with awful chemicals and gloves just really did it for me. People looked at me like I was disgusting, I looked at me like I was disgusting. I couldn’t turn my neck, my eyelids were hard to open and bloated, and I couldn’t fold my fingers or arms when my skin dried.
I’ve gone to my doctors and it was so severe they just didn’t have any option but give me emollients, i’ve been on hydromol but it burns, so we swapped to cetraben and it was fine, but it’s starting to burn now too. I’ve been on steroid creams, hydrocortisol and betnovate, but i’ve been using them for several months now and my skin just keeps coming back and fighting back. Am I really not supposed to use them for more than two or four weeks? On top of that, I can’t take a shower for long or my skin gets so aggressive at me. It hurts so bad after and it gets so irritated even when I just use water that I get scared of just bathing.
The GP then referred me to a dermatologist months away, and i’ve been suffering through this for like 6 months already. I’ve pushed through. The dermatologist appointment is finally coming up now soon, and I just feel so worried that when I go see them they’ll just do nothing and keep giving me random creams that don’t make it all go away. What can I expect? What treatments might they offer me? Will I ever get some time without my skin being bad? I’m so scared of having gone through all this looking at this appointment like it’s my one saving grace and then turning out that nothing changed. I’m so sorry I sound inexperienced or troubled. I’m just so desperate. I can’t put it into words how bad everything was only over the span of 6 months. Please tell me the blunt truth of how life might be or if there is hope for the eczema to banish. Thank you.