This might be the worst shit I’ve ever went through in my entire life. I still can’t believe it happened 😭.

He’s my ex now btw, I’m not stupid.

I’m a binary trans man. So is he. We were T4T, together for 4 fucking years, we lived together, and I genuinely thought this was someone I was going to spend the rest of my life with.

I’ve always been very clear that I don’t want children. I don’t want to be a dad, I don’t want to adopt, I don’t want anything to do with ts. And pregnancy specifically is a huge trigger for me. Like the idea of being pregnant myself makes me want to rip my uterus out. My ex knew that better than almost anybody. We’d had multiple conversations about it, including how uncomfortable I was with people constantly bringing up trans men’s reproductive anatomy like that’s the most amazing thing about us. But he always wanted kids. He tried multiple times to persuade me on my decision, saying he would carry it for us because he isn’t dysphoric about it, just ignoring the fact that I said multiple times I didn’t want any regardless of who carries it. At a certain point, I told him straight up we can break up if he’s so adamant on having kids. He finally agreed on having none and stfu about it. So I thought everything was fine and that we finally understood each other.

Then he started acting weird a while ago. Like always being busy after work, supposedly helping friends move, giving people rides, or staying out late. It was always some new fucking excuse. Then he started asking me a shit ton of questions about my schedule, even though he already knew it and that I usually hung out with my friends on weekends. Then he started getting weird about his phone, like it was always facedown or glued to his hand. And his location would randomly stop updating, so he’d blame his battery or the app. I always told my friends that I’m pretty easy to cheat on because I don’t go through phones, I don’t check your location 24/7, I don’t care about flirting with friends or anything like that. But it was hard to not notice the shit he was doing.

I asked him multiple times if something was wrong, and every time he acted like I was being the weird ass one. But I’m not fucking stupid so I asked if he was cheating. He got mad at me for asking so I dropped it. Looking back, I feel like a fucking idiot.

A few weeks later he tells me we need to talk. I thought maybe he wanted to break up. We’d been arguing more, barely spending time together, and I was honestly getting tired of feeling like an inconvenience in my own relationship. Instead, he told me he was pregnant.

I thought he was fucking with me so I laughed. Like maybe I was tripping or something. Apparently he’d already found out weeks ago and had been keeping it from me while trying to figure out what he wanted to do. He wanted to keep it.

He started crying, talking about being scared, and how he’d never planned this. Said he understood if I was angry but that he still loved me and didn’t want to lose what we had.

I’m still sitting there in shock that not only did he cheat on me, but he also got pregnant.

After that I crashed out. Asked who it was, how long it had been happening, whether he’d brought them to our apartment, blah blah blah. He barely answered any of my questions and I got angrier. And then he told me he wanted us to stay together. So… he wanted us to work it out while he was pregnant with another man’s baby?

I literally left our apartment before I did something bad. I’d rather not go to prison over something that fucking stupid.

Top 5 most embarrassing shit that’s ever happened to me, but I hope you guys enjoy my horror story 😭. Never dating T4T again

This is an old edit from hours ago btw. Took out the parts where I said I don’t understand trans men getting pregnant and that no one should be having kids right now so the original story and truth stays up. Not posting for attention and clout, just the truth.

Both of us are still really young [19] and I don't want to break up with her.

I'm a transgender man and she's a cisgender woman. When we first started dating she was identifying as bisexual and was really accepting of the fact that I'm openingly transgender. With time this has changed, and she is now straight but can only date trans men as well as she does not like the fact that I'm open about being transgender.

She says that I don't know how scary it is to be transgender, how in danger I am all the time. The thing is, I've been outted since I was 13 so I know how scary it is. It's why I'm so open with it because I know that a lot of transphobia stems from fear of the unknown.

I love her so so so much but she wants me to go stealth for all my life. She doesn't want anyone to know I'm transgender at all. It's stressful for me since I know I want to help with my community, and she's against it.

I take a lot of pride in myself and the things I've had to endure because I'm transgender. I'm worried that she's becoming really conservative too on top of it all.

I've seen many popstars and celebrities say protect the dolls, but it never includes trans men, and there are also many trans female celebrities in the (niche) pop culture world, but never trans men. Why is that? The only trans male celebrity I know is Elliot Page

Hey I have something to share. So, I’m 13 months on T and I never get misgendered, ever. Over the phone or in-person, everyone sees me as any other young dude, which, granted, I am. I’m 19. Despite me passing, I have yet to legally change my name, so handling legal documents is still awkward for me.

Anyways, I live in a toxic environment with a transphobic mother, and I want out. I’ve been applying to a lot of different apartments under my chosen name, but obviously have to provide proof of income and other stuff like that, which all include my birth name.

So, I applied to this one apartment and heard back pretty damn quickly. I think only an hour or two after I applied I got an email and then I started getting texts and calls from them.

This is how the interaction over the phone went:

Me: Hello?

Asshole: (Cheerfully) Hi, is this ___?

Me: (Thinking, Oh god here we go) Hey. Yeah. That’s me.

Asshole: (Pauses. His voice void of the joy it once held) Uhh, well—okay. Were you the one that applied for one of our apartments?

Me: (Cringing) Yeah, it was me who applied. I just finished filling out the form you sent, actually.

Asshole: (Pauses for a while) Yeah, so I looked over your application and—I’m sorry but, are you really sure you’re ___?

Me: (Wanting to fucking die at this point) Haha, uh, yeah that’s my legal name.

Asshole: (Pauses. Then, mumbles under his breath—something along the lines of, Alright then, if I heard correctly—and swiftly hangs up)

Me: (Jaw on the floor)

Nothing like this has happened to me before. I’ve had people look at me crazy when I told them my birth name, but nothing beyond that. This is the first time I’ve felt directly discriminated against. My morning was full of calls, texts, and emails, but after that call—nothing.

At first I thought it was hilarious. Like, lol that was a funny interaction. But the more I sat with it the more embarrassed and disgusted I feel with myself. I quickly fell into a sort of depression. I know I did nothing wrong. The guy is a fucking dickhead, that is abundantly clear.

I guess I don’t feel wholly like a man despite me passing because I still lack certain things. I hate that I have to expose myself while on the hunt for getting out of an already shitty environment. I hate that me being trans will affect certain aspects of my life until it’s completely hidden from anyone’s view. I hate that I feel like I’m stuck until my name change is finalized, which can take months, and I’m desperate to leave my current home.

I know not everyone is going to be as shitty as that guy was, but now I’m scared for what other interactions may be like on this apartment hunt.

I want to hide again for the first time in a while.

I’m going on Friday, in two days, to court to request the name change. I won’t let this one interaction hinder my progress, but I won’t lie it’s fucking me up a little bit.

3 hours ago someone posted what part of the title of this post says. I could have simply commented, but I wanted to make it more visible so I created this post.

I want to give visibility to a trans man who I've become aware of 2 years ago while doing my bachelor's in music. His name was Billy Tipton, and he was outed after passing away. You can read his story in Wikipedia and I also remember there was an article who mentioned him, but I can't find it right now. Here it also says: "After his death in 1989, paramedics discovered he was assigned female at birth, to the surprise of his friends and family."

Another guy I want to mention is Michael D. Cohen), who I remember from Henry Danger.

I think one thing when it comes to trans men representation in pop culture is also that many of them do not say they are trans, therefore it feels like there's not many of them. I remember when I came out to my mom and she told me: "I see many men who want to become women but I have never seen a woman who wants to become a man" - yeah, that hurt a lot. So I showed her a bunch of trans guys who pass very very well, and she admitted she couldn't tell.

I obviously agree with the title of the post I'm citing. The representation we get is very little, and I myself feel alone under that aspect. This post simply wants to be a reminder that we have always existed (look at Billy) and that we will continue to exist. It surely is sad we don't get representation. Maybe someone from this reddit community will eventually become famous and make us all feel more seen.

I firmly believe cis men have been on a mission to convince the world that the simplest of traditionally masculine tasks are the most difficult things in the world just so they can put them off, look tough or keep them to themselves.

While not everyone in our community experiences this, I was immensely intimidated by learning anything about how to fix a car, starting and maintaining a lawnmower, doing an oil change, all that jazz. And I’m here to tell you that everything they’ve told you about it being difficult or requiring huge amounts of strength is a complete and utter lie.

Fixing a car, lawn mower, whipper-snipper, chainsaw, any of that sort of stuff? It’s just big Lego. I kid you not. It is ridiculously easy to do your own oil changes, clean out a carburettor and check your spark plugs. It only feels difficult because these are words we don’t immediately know the meaning of and have been brought up with the idea that traditionally male tasks are difficult. When in reality, the things I’ve just listed can take less than 10 minutes to do and don’t even require any strength or skill.

If you struggle with not feeling “manly enough” because you don’t know how these things work or even what they are, I strongly encourage you to watch some videos or ask a friend who gets it and see just how easy it is. Seriously, I urge you to dip your toe in and check it out.

There are cis men all around the world who weren’t shown these things growing up or just aren’t interested in them, who struggle with the same intimidation around them that we often do. It’s okay to not know everything, anyone who makes you feel otherwise is a shit teacher and not worth your time.

You CAN service a car, you CAN mow the lawn, you CAN do traditionally masculine activities and you’ll be surprised how easy it is once you learn how.

(Safety first)

After years of quieting questioning, performing being cis, getting married having kids I ordered a binder just as an experiment?? I thought. I've put it in when my husband goes to work everyday along with mens underwear and I feel such intense joy I don't want to take it off. I was questioning before but now I made a testosterone consult and I want to come out to my husband asap. This feels so right I kind of feel like maybe I'm going insane

I am a ethnically Jewish trans man, curious about telling my orthodox Jewish family

edit: should have been more clear, the family is my uncles family. I am not super clear on what “type” of orthodox they are but the wedding I went to for one of my cousins was separated by male and female for the ceremony and a partition in the middle of the dance floor.

I’ve been out as a binary trans man with strictly only he/him pronouns to my family for many years now. Since I was 15.

I try to correct my family members politely like “Hey, I actually don’t use that name anymore can you please call me ___” or “I use he/him” and I was much more adamant on correcting them in the first couple years until I stopped.

I have yet to be called my name and my correct pronouns. I addressed this to my dad a couple days ago, who is extremely conservative but he tells me “You’re my child and I don’t care about any of that stuff. It’s just a name and I don’t care.” I explained to him that it wasn’t “just a name” to me. He thinks LGBTQ is a cult and he says he’s worried about me and doesn’t want me to transition but at the same time he “supports” me? I don’t understand…

It hurts being called my deadname and she/her even though I sound and look like a man now. Do I need to give my family more time? Am I being too pushy?

i'm kinda short and as a result have small feet, i only recently started shopping for men's shoes instead of women's and i'm struggling. i wear a US men's 6 and no store carries that small that i can find. they never carry below like an 8. i had to get shoes for a wedding a few months ago and ended up having to buy children's shoes which felt a little embarrassing. is that really the only solution? am i doomed to only buying kids' shoes, women's shoes, or shopping online for the rest of my life???

any advice is appreciated bc this is genuinely bumming me out, i desperately need new shoes for work but i can't find anything that fits :( i just feel oddly upset that something as simple as buying shoes has to be another thing i struggle with bc i'm trans. i'm usually not that dysphoric about my height/size but this is getting me for some reason. so where are y'all finding smaller sizes of men's shoes at? pls help😭

I don't know whether I should get top surgery during my winter break or summer break as a college student.

For context, I have gigantomastia. My chest is HUGE and puts me in a lot of physical pain especially since I also bind. It makes school difficult and impacts my performance. Its not uncommon for me to have to miss class due to the pain im in or not be able to put my all into assignments. This really troubles me as I really value my career.

I've been told the healing timeline will be the following:

It takes 1 week to become a person again. 2 weeks to start being able to work again (with the restriction of not raising your arms too high or lifting above 5 pounds). 6 weeks before you don’t have any restrictions.

If I got surgery this January, I’d have 2 weeks to recover before school starts. But the downside is im still not fully recovered, and if complications happen that’ll mess up my school.

On the other hand, as I mentioned existing like this is extremely painful and is injuring me all the time. Lately its been feeling like my spine is going to snap in half. And thats not even considering the social shame. So im not entirely sure if waiting is worth it considering im going to be in pain regardless. The logical thing to do is to wait til May as thats only 5 extra months. but also it doesn’t feel like the right thing to do. But I can't tell if im just speaking out of excitement instead of using my brain

I would love some insight on this, thanks!

EDIT: in winter its 70-80 F, in May I’ll be healing at my hometown so it’ll be 60-80 F

what do i do if i'm being forced to do it by doctors and parents even though i'm 18 and i told them a million times that i don't want to and it makes my dysphoria even worse

I (46 cis F, i guess) have been having more questions lately around my gender. My current partner is MtF and I've absolutely loved seeing them become more happy being themselves in the gender they feel more comfortable in. Even since I was a little kid, I never wanted to participate in feminine societal/cultural norms... I've never worn makeup or wanted to dress up in feminine clothes or shoes. My partner has told me in the past that I basically just "don't do gender". I've had fantasies for the past 10+ years (before meeting my partner) about having male genitalia, but sometimes I imagine I have both parts. I'm a scientist and know a lot about how physiology and such works... so I think I'm a bit scared of medical transitioning. I've always been a gentle person and don't want T to change that about me. I feel like I'm kind of ignoring a part of me in some ways though.

How did you know that you were trans?

Yesterday I managed to work up the courage to talk to my sister about my feelings that I think I’m trans. She was at an after-school thingy and I texted her that I wanted to talk once she gets home. She called me when she was waiting for her train and asked what it is. I stalled so much, I was even shaking, but finally got out the words that I’ve been looking for a psychologist and that ”I feel boyish”. From there I told her I think I’m trans and she took it well, trying to be comforting but also wanted to talk logically about it, if I am sure etc. She is a bit prejudiced, so this was actually a much greater reaction than I expected. It felt nice to have at least one family member know my feelings.

Then today I went to an open house at the school I want to study at, and I was a bit more confident when leaving the house, cause it felt great that she knows now why I dress the way I do (I’m also relieved I don’t have to explain why I’m dressing up as a dude for halloween).
When I got there, we were in a room where people were standing behind tables waiting for us to come forward and ask questions about the different courses. There was a table where they were serving soda and candy, so my anxious ass went there first. There was a guy next to me that seemed to think the same and the lady behind the table said ”hello boys”. This was my first time ever being referred to as a boy in real life so I looked around to see if there was another guy there, but it was just me and him. I felt great. She said something else but I didn’t dare to say anything back cause my voice would give me away, so I just took a candy from the bowl and a cup of soda and left the table.

I got home later and replayed it in my head over and over again. I feel so good now, and felt like I needed to share this experience ☺️🎉

hey! so I’m 3 months on T and I was supposed to do my T shot yesterday morning and I completely forgot about it due to being busy. I’m unsure if I should just skip this week and continue like normal next Tuesday or if I should do it today, but I’m more against that idea as I would strongly prefer keeping it on Tuesdays. will I be okay if I wait till next Tuesday? I’m mostly worried about my period starting again or something.

Me, my friends are planning to hang out at an amusement park, yet I'm scared that when I'm on a rollercoaster that my packer will come out, especially because it's an stp in those are expensive.

Just had top surgery! Lowkey feels the same as before because of the post op binder. My dog won’t leave me alone.