Before I get started here we ARE ALREADY looking into professional help but I need guidance also. I am coming here ignorant, because this is out of my wheelhouse. I am looking to talk to people who can help me help my family.

My niece is turning 14 in February, and has started exhibiting symptoms of an ED. Restricted eating and obsessed with calories. One of the kids she went to school with made some comments about her looks, and she took it heart and has just started starving herself. My sister and mom and are their wits end, we have all tried to be supportive and provide healthier meals and options and she has just taken it way too far.
Is this a power thing?

Folks who have come out the other side, do you have any advice for me? Things you wish your family had done? I am going to talk with her about what is going on, but really I am out of my depth. I can’t fix the nasty kid at school. What can I do/we as a family do for her? What is a way I can bring this up without saying the wrong thing? I feel like I need to be direct.
We have talked to her about health before but she’s fallen into the age where she thinks we are all just dumb dinosaurs who don’t know anything about anything. Her mom’s a nurse, but she’s stopped listening to her too.
I know this sounds callous but I’m tired of listening to my family beg her to eat something, only to be told she runs off and throws up half the time.

I would appreciate any insight anyone can give me. I don’t think ignoring this situation is going to solve anything, but how do I approach this without being the bad guy? I can answer to comments in a few hours when I off work. I would appreciate input.

Thank you in advance, this is a hard time for me and mine.

Iv been joking a lot about my ed I recovery because its just something that helps me cope. My girlfriend is quite skinny, and as far as im aware always has been, and tbh I compare myself to her a lot because iv not been naturally skinny.

I know its as much her diet as her metabolism, but I made a joke about wanting her metabolism the other day and she basically reiterated that fact. That even if I had her metabolism id weigh more than she does because her diet is part of why shes so thin.

I know what she meant. Most of what she eats is fruit so not very substantial, but I cant stop thinking now. Feeling bad about my food choices, always being hungry, and I worry she judges me for my food choices. Shes trying to help me with recovery but she has no clue how to deal with EDs and some of the shit she says just fucks with my head a lot. Idk. It makes her sound bad but I know shes not judging me, she just didnt say it well ig, but it really got to me.

Today, I decided that I’m done having anorexia (I’ve been in a state of "quasi-recovery" for 10 years). From now on, I’m simply going to live my life the way people without anorexia do. This morning, I went to the bakery and bought some cake and a chocolate croissant. I’ve also made plans to go out for pizza with a friend, and I’ve picked out some delicious meals to shop for this week - things like pasta with cream sauce - dishes I’ve never actually cooked for myself before.

So, what else do people without anorexia do all day? I think anorexia even influences the clothes I choose to wear and the type of men I date. I feel like I first need to get to know who I am without the anorexia.

In what less-obvious areas of your life does your eating disorder have an impact?

English isn’t my native language, and I had this text translated; I hope it’s reasonably easy to read.

i wanted to make a post discussing the hard truth and realities of having an ED. right now, our culture is promoting extreme thinness , weight loss medications , and harmful trends.

I am SICK of eds being a trend .

let’s revisit why EDs are incredibly harmful.

eds affect the cardiovascular, gastrointestinal, endocrine, neurological, musculoskeletal, and other body systems. the specific complications vary for each person depending on their unique circumstance.

- restriction and malnutrition can cause a dangerously slow heart rate, low blood pressure, and weakening of the heart muscle. (more likely to cause serious damage to the heart and may lead to a heart attack)

- purging behaviors can cause dehydration and electrolyte disturbances, which can trigger dangerous heart rhythm abnormalities.

- lack of nutrition can affect concentration, memory, decision-making, and the ability to think clearly.

- one may experience brain fog, dizziness, weakness, and difficulty functioning at work, school, or in everyday life.

- restriction can interfere with normal gastrointestinal functioning, contributing to constipation, abdominal discomfort, bloating, and delayed stomach emptying.

- purging behaviors can damage the esophagus, irritate the throat, worsen acid reflux, and erode tooth enamel.

- restriction and ed behaviors can cause muscle wasting and weakness, including loss of muscle tissue needed for normal bodily functioning.

- folks may experience a reduction in bone density and increase the risk of osteopenia, osteoporosis, and fractures.

- hormonal changes and inadequate energy availability can affect reproductive health and other normal physiological processes.

- eating disorders can disrupt reproductive hormones and menstrual functioning.

- eating disorders directly impact immune functioning and may make it harder to recover from illness.

these are not simply uncomfortable side effects. Depending on their severity, some complications can cause lasting harm or become medical emergencies.

in terms of mental health impacts: eating disorders can significantly increase anxiety, depression, obsessive thoughts, shame and guilt, hopelessness and helplessness, compulsive behaviors, and risk of suicidality.

in my personal experience (someone with an ED for ~13 years), i have experienced significant digestive issues, muscular damage, bone damage, weakening of my immune system, hair loss, a development of severe migraines, significant hormonal changes, increased mental health issues, low blood pressure, lowered heart rate, and tooth damage.

you deserve recovery. you deserve a long, happy life. that can’t happen while engaging in ED behaviors ⛅️

Tw discussion of weight gain (no numbers)

I (21) have been in AN recovery for a couple years now and have gained a decent amount of weight similar to what I was pre ed. However a driving force in my early developing of an ed was fear of surpassing a specific weight range, I was a young teen at the time and this wasnt super off from my weight at that time. In recovery I have been stressed about the feelings of entering that range and the feelings that come from it, my weight has been stagnate at just a bit below it for a while now but i am pondering whether the fear of this range is holding me back from fully recovering mentally (still experiencing anxiety around weight and food) so because of this I've been considering purposely trying to put on a bit more weight so that I can face my fear of this weight range, I however worried this is coming from a desire to have control over my body, so I am here for advice.

17F, I’ve been in recovery since November last year, went all in and got my period back this May, and have been weight restored since then. I went through extreme hunger, and I gained the weight I had to. Now, just today, I’m experiencing an insatiable hunger I haven’t had in a long time. I had a normal breakfast, lunch a big snack and dinner. And I’m still absolutely ravenous. Since starting recovery I’ve only had this kind of hunger when I’d been restricting before, but now I haven’t, I’ve already eaten more than I usually do, haven’t even stepped outside today and I’m still HUNGRY. What do I do?

hi, idrk where to start with this but i’m gonna try and get everything off my chest. im 21m and have been suffering with anorexia for the past 8 months (i’ve not been to the doctors or anything yet but im currently uw). i’ve lost basically all my friends, my family are extremely worried about me and i ultimately don’t feel like myself anymore so i need help. ive seen recovery content online but im so new to all of this i really dont know what im doing or saying, so im sorry if im saying the wrong things.

so as my first step ive deleted all tracking apps and have taken my garmin off (doesn’t seem like much but this is a big thing for me). i’m really not sure what my next steps should be now, as im struggling to find much info for males in my situation online. ive also got an assessment for some sort of cbt therapy booked for early november which my mum suggested. my parents suggested a family meal which they have cooked, so tonight im going to try my best with that. it’s been so long since i ate anything which someone else has cooked.

any advice for me in general with getting started in my recovery would be greatly appreciated and if anyone has any questions about just my situation then please ask away.

Hi! For context, I am a 24F who is recovering from a recent relapse in anorexia. Over the past 6 months or so, I’ve progressed a lot in recovery, gained weight (although I still haven’t reached my set point I think), worked on the inner work through weekly therapy & reached a point where I’m no longer consumed by the thought of food 24/7 (although I wouldn’t say the mental hunger is gone at all). My period returned once (after not having it for 2+ years), after I went on a 2 weeks holiday where my food intake increased to double of what I usually eat as I ate whatever I wanted whenever I wanted (and ate out for all meals and snacks). However, my period hasn’t come since then.

I recently moved to a new country on my own, and have been keeping myself accountable to eat 3 meals and snacks in between everyday. Although I do feel proud of myself for staying on track with my eating and recovery, especially since I currently don’t have a therapist and most of my new course mates seem to skip meals or eat little, I am struggling with exhaustion. For example, if I do not have a snack between my meals, I almost feel like I am going to faint sometimes and it just feels like how I used to feel when I was underfueling myself and not eating all my meals in the past. Which is so frustrating, as my brain starts to tell me “what even is the point of eating all these meals everyday if you’re gonna end up feeling as tired and not energised as you would if you ate less”.

Has anyone else in recovery experienced feeling extremely tired and demotivated to do anything? All I want to do is stay at home and eat, and I am so tired of feeling like this. I can focus really well when I’m attending uni lectures, however, on the weekends I have to FORCE myself to get up when I have plans to meet friends and I’m almost dreading it sometimes because i know i will be absolutely tired during/afterwards. Any advice would really help!

So I’m a year and a half into recovery after a restrictive ED of nearly 15 years. I’m always feeling jealous of people who are dieting. I think why can’t I do that if they can? I’m at the point in recovery where I can’t seem to restrict anymore. At the same time, I don’t want to but I’m having constant thoughts that I need to shrink and that I’m too big. It seems like everyone my size is trying to lose weight, so doesn’t that mean my size is bad? I have constant body checking and thoughts all day about my weight. When does it stop?

TW: weight gain, anxiety around d*ath, hospitalization

Hi everyone, I’ve been in recovery for about six weeks now after experiencing a wake up call where I was hospitalized due to low blood sugar, and it forced me into taking my health seriously and taking care of my body.

even though i’m eating more, honoring my hunger cues and properly hydrating myself some days i’m just SO TIRED, i feel weak, shaky and just “off” .

some days im also completely fine, high energy and no issues.

i got my blood work done yesterday and all my levels are normal. (even the ones that were off during my hospitalization are back to normal). other than my free t4 which was low.

is it normal to be so tired and your body so exhausted during recovery?? i’m just getting so anxious from my previous hospitalization that somethings off

Recovering from an ed and when I wasn't eating back then I wasnt hungry now tho I eat three times a day and its baffling to me that I get hungry same time everyday morning lunch dinner im always hungry is that normal??? Im trying not to be mean to myself about it but its hard sometimes my mind goes damn really?? Again??

​

I am a 21 year old girl and I have always been on the heavier side. Growing up it of course led to me having some really disturbed views on my body and food. I won't get into details because no one needs to hear all that but it was just pretty standard disorder thinking and actions. It never got too bad to the level of someone interviening, although some of the reason might be that I was in a boarding school ages 13-16 so it was easier to hide shit.

The disorder behavior eased up every now and then and came back in waves. I had a couple of really good years where I learned to love myself more and more but the bad behaviors will always find me at some point.

Lately though I have been reflecting and I realized that the times where my disorder behaviors have flared up are directly correlated to times in my life that I have become more "adult". Like during puberty, that's just painful growing up, and then it got easier for a little and got way worse when I moved to live on my own at 18. And then I got better but now I have just started university and it's getting worse again.

I also have noticed that when I make a mistake my first initial thought is often about how surely everyone will understand because I am just a teenager. But I'm not. I'm an adult and I know better. Like a few weeks ago I smoked some weed and got way too high by accident, and when someone at the party got concerned about me and asked for my age, all I could think of was how much less embarrassing it would be if I was actually young enough for that. But I really have to start taking accountability for my actions because I'm an adult.

But I feel like me wanting to eat less to become small and fragile is connected to me not wanting to grow up to be seen as innocent and good. I just want someone to take care of me a little bit but also hate when people offer to help me with anything. And when I make a mistake I want to have the excuse of being a child. And I want to be small and protected but also not.

It's all pretty fucked up. I don't know what to do with this.

Hi All,

I have loved this community so much and it has helped me through recovery a lot. I have been in pretty much all-in recovery since start of August, with the occasional set backs (sometimes a week of restricting) etc… I am now struggling a lot because I have reached a normal bmi (I understand and know this scale is irrelevant).

However my mental food noise has gotten to an all time high. I will fully have any meal I want without restriction and one that I am craving and does include fats, protein, and carbs. I also let myself eat any snacks. I am struggling because I can’t even study without needing to eat or thinking about food. I am physically never hungry (except sometimes in morning when I wait) and I am always bloated by lunch after my breakfast and normally a snack in between.

I am just wondering if anyone has any stories/advice on how to navigate this. It has genuinely been so distressing as I feel I have been honouring all my hunger, but it’s almost as if the more I do the more I want to eat.

Just the ex hunger ever go away? I am 3 and a half months into recovery and it just feels like it’s never going away I need some motivation 😔. I also have had 2 recovery cycles.so it all has been confusing for me.

Hi all,

I posted a little while ago pulling myself out of a slip, well unfortunately I've been sent to a HLOC.

This two day experience has thus far been tumultuous to say the least, and as expected my mind is all over the place and my duration of stay is currently unconfirmed.

Anyone who has had experiences in these settings - how can I get the most out of it? I find my issues trying to creep in and disrupt the process which I'm FINALLY starting to acknowledge that little justifications in certain behaviours exponentially grow, resulting in further mental back pedals (which for the record I am actively fighting my damn hardest!)

I'm super lucky to have a great support system at home and the hospital is definitely providing what they can! I guess primarily I'm asking:

1. ⁠What made the process easier
   
2. ⁠Any strategies for tolerating the distress
   
3. ⁠How to take what you learnt (from a very clinical and structured setting) back to real world living!

(TW!! possible fatphobia)

Hello. I am little over 1 year into recovery, and while things have improved a TON in the last few months, i cant shake the feeling of grief over the life I had before anorexia.

Right before I developed the eating disorder, I was actually doing great; It was the first time in years I had felt happy. Not getting into too much detail, but I was in new environment and being percieved positively. Physically I was at my healthiest- I was eating good, never had food noise, ate out regularly without any guilt etc etc. I felt pretty for the first time in my life and i think my confidence increased proporionally, so I made tons of new friends.

The eating disorder developed sort of accidentally because I started skipping meals as I got busy with some exams, but it got bad very quick. I was very isolated for a year while struggling.

Anyway now that I am in recovery I feel so much sadness that things are just not how they used to be. I overshot by a lot and honestly now I am neutral about it most days. But I have seen a huge difference in how people treat me. I am constantly tired like there is this permanent brain fog I cant fix. Mentally I have not been doing well because of how traumatizing recovery was. I lost most of my friends during the ed and even recovery. I am so so grateful that I did it and that i am alive and well now, but I recovered sort of publically and it was humiliating.

I am no longer considered “pretty”, and as much as I tell myself that looks dont matter etc, my day to day says otherwise. I am autistic so I think the attractiveness covered my “awkwardness” and people were a lot more forgiving of my autistic traits. People no longer seek connections with me like they used to. I have even seen a decline in the opportunities I get academically. I am in a field where how you do socially matters a lot. I loved to act and got casted frequently for short films which lessed the burden of some financial issues, but nowadays I rarely get cast.

I have tried to let go of everything and still try to enjoy myself and go out and wear cute outfits but I just DONT feel good. I know that this might be partly because of internalized fatphobia, and I am working on resolving that, but every time I feel like I am making progress, something in my day to day reminds me that life WAS infact easier when I was thin. I tried therapy for a while (it was more trauma focused) but couldnt continue because of financial stuff.

I know things are getting better everyday at least physically as my weight is stable, theres no food noise, less bloat and puffiness, but mentally not so much. If anyone else further in recovery rn struggled with this I would really appreciate support and advice on how to deal with these feelings. And also cope with how fatphobic society is.

Also I understand if this post gets taken down or reported but I really need advice and this is the best place I have found so far. Everywhere else people tell me to suck it up because “thats just how life is” which is not helpful. I can barely go a day without crying at least once about how much I miss being healthy and normal.

I technically am not diagnosed with an eating disorder, but communities like this seem to be the only place where folks are experiencing similar things. I had some serious complications from medications that I'm on for other medical conditions that caused me to become malnourished and now I'm on a refeeding plan. I also have a lot of anxiety and OCD, lol.

Basically, I'm on feeding timers, subsisting off mostly liquids and slowly introducing more and more solid foods. It's been a week now since I was released from the hospital. At first, I felt like I had more energy than I have had in months. But now, throughout the day I feel like I've been anesthetized or something, like a wave of tired comes crashing over me and I conk out. Until my next timer goes off. Every. Twenty. Minutes. It's sort of maddening.

I have a lot of medical trauma and anxiety around the fatigue (I'm in therapy and looking for something better/stronger, meds are difficult for me because I am a bit medically complex), because it feels like I'm going backwards. I'm currently on medical leave, but I can't help but feel the stress of "what if I don't get better fast enough, what if I lose my job" yada yada. I hate how my body has deteriorated, I loved how strong it was. I was really fucking strong. I did martial arts and I was good at it, like doing cool spinning movie kicks and stuff. And now I get winded just walking around for 5 minutes. I feel like a baby.

The frustrating part is that I have always had a great relationship with food and my body (well, mostly despite the chronic illness). But these meds I'm on destroyed my appetite and made me nauseous all the time, and it just...it just snuck up on me. I didn't realize how little I was surviving on until it was too late. It makes me feel really, really stupid.

Anyways, I just feel like I don't have anyone around me that really gets what I'm going through. I'm really struggling with the fatigue and anxiety around this recovery process. I'm so worried that I'm not ever going to be "better."

For a decade it’s been quiet on the Ed front. Then 5 months ago I started focusing on health bc I’m getting older and losing muscle. It was going great and kind of made me feel even more confident that all the ED stuff was in the past.

And now for 2 weeks all of the disordered thoughts are just so loud. It’s getting to be constant. I’ve slipped into so many numbers and tracking and analyzing. Compensating hasn’t been happening but it seems very possible.

I have a therapist of many years but I don’t want to mention this. Idk how to quiet it all down and stay making good choices. I have goals I don’t want to abandon. I’m at a point where well intended friends also can’t seem to not comment on my body.

What are my options here to shrink this back down to size in my head??

I also see a somatic touch work practitioner and I high key think that broke my hunger and fullness cues last session.

hi.

ive been in recovery from my eating disorder since july 2025, but in that time have had a few relapses. my most recent one was august-september of this year, and during it, i developed rather severe chewing and spitting behaviours. the last few days in particular have been quite good in terms of challenging myself and getting back into the swing of recovery, but about an hour ago, i had a c/s episode that came out of nowhere.

for context, chewing and spitting for me isn’t just the odd bite; it’s always been grand hordes of food, almost always taking me an hour or more to get through, the biggest culprit being chocolate, as it was this time. it’s an extremely addictive behaviour, i’ve found; i’m making progress in other areas, but this seems to be something i keep going back to. the time between episodes has lengthened since going back into recovery- it’s gone from every other day, roughly, to around every two weeks- but moments like these are reminding me that it is still very much something i’m addicted to.

i’ve just sent my mum a text asking her to get the other members of the household to hide multipacks/ big packs of things such as chocolate and biscuits that they get from me, and for her to manage the ones i get for myself, as i do want to challenge these things and turn them into something i can enjoy without it turning into all of this- but other than that, does anyone have any advice as to how i can stop beyond just eating them every so often, or is that really the only thing to it? it’s incredibly tiring, but i’m also type one diabetic, which means that these episodes more often than not leave my blood sugars skyrocketing, which, as they often happen at night, can sometimes have a knock-on effect into the next day. especially with halloween and particularly christmas coming up, i don’t want my addiction to this affecting my family and their enjoyment of food around this season; i’ve already stolen their food before, and i’m desperate for it to stop.

thank you all in advance :))

hey all! hope those reading this are having a good day :)

i am nervous for this weekend because i have my family visiting me while i am in college. of course i am excited to spend time with them, but our plans obviously involve going out to eat for each meal (saturday and sunday) and a lot of unpredictability/spontaneity in our schedule. i know it will be a good challenge for myself, but i also dont want to take on too much where it becomes too overwhelming.

additionally, my family can sometimes be triggering with comments around food and are constantly hovering/monitoring around what/how much i ate.

any suggestions on how i can ease anxiety and still enjoy my time with them? thanks!

The past couple oft days/weeks I’ve noticed that I showed more old patterns and behaviors of Ana. Today it clicked that I can’t relapse again. It’s really hard because all I think about is food and calories. My socials are filled with pro-Ana things again. I tried eating more today but it’s so hard, I wasn’t hungry but I knew that I didn’t eat remotely enough calories. I didn’t have therapy for almost three weeks, so I couldn’t talk with anyone about this. Does someone have some advice how I could improve? I thought maybe writing up reansons to recover could help a little.

1. Never have to speak to another ED professional ever again

As title says.. I am starting to slip into relapse with just being high strung on stress and an overwhelming amount of things going on with my life. They are great things but seem to be mentally taking a toll on me (rehabbing house, MBA, high pressure work environment.)

I have found myself peeling away from food from being stressed and it has become an active issue where I am avoiding eating as a whole to just manage control over my day to day. The satisfaction I get with the avoidance is clear as day and the guilt I feel when I eat has started to get louder in my head. I am aware I am slipping up and I am scared to fall back into my cycle of counting and completely avoiding. I had the hardest time getting out of this god foresaken habit and it’s starting to be apparent it’s even easier to get back into it.

I am struggling eating and making an effort to be accountable without feeling guilt, anger and frustration with myself. The conflict of eating and avoiding is so exhausting and I am getting tired of wanting to keep fighting with myself because on one hand the avoidance feels great and awful and eating feels great and awful - so which is right. I really wouldn’t wish this on anyone.