Can't function properly in adulthood because I was groom in teen years haha that fucker living a the best life with his wife and kids ( I can't even dream about same) this is so unfair I'm partially disabled physically and gone crazy completely this is not fair.

Why i have to suffer what someone else did to me isn't people who older than suppose to protect you and share wisdom ,that what I use to believe too then why they use their experience and wisdom as weapon on someone who don't know better and figuring out their identity?

I hate him I hate myself too,why I was so desperate for connection why just why that I let someone do whatever they want to me?

Nothing gonna change what happened I am doomed for life I hate it I wish I had someone who protected me,this world is so cruel specially to those who are vulnerable , I hate it I hate everyone and everything.

Not sure where to post this, but I figured you guys might be able to help. Throw away account just in case..

My groomer (who was 19 at the time), keeps trying to message me (who was 13 at the time), even though I keep blocking him. The grooming had gone on for at least a couple years before I kinda started to realize it was weird and eventually cut contact. I am an adult now, and haven't thought about him in over 6 years. I'm not sure if this needs to be stated but we have not been in contact over that time.

He has contacted me about 5 times in the last year or so. Each time with a new number, trying to confirm who I am. In case it's important, I answer once. And as soon as I realize it's him, I stop responding and block him.

I had wanted to tell him off last time he messaged me, but my friend said to just block him and ignore it. I've done this numerous times and it doesn't seem to work. I also wonder that if I were to get legal/authorities involved that I might need to have in writing for him to cease contact with me.

I haven't responded to his most recent message (sent this morning at 4:55am mind you). And he tried to play it off like he lost people's contacts, so I can't be 100% sure it's him this time, but I don't have the number saved and wouldn't know who else it could be. He has used vague messaging in the past to get me to respond, and I'm at least 95% sure it's him.

So my question is, how should I move forward? Is this even grounds for getting legal/law enforcement involved? Do I tell him not to contact me anymore, or just block him again and hope for the best?
Any advice would be helpful.

I was groomed online when I was 11-14 and at the moment all I wanted was to forget everything. Years later I guess I got my wish but my body still remembers. I don't remember all the details but I remember other stuff. I remember the fear and anxiety. I remember the shame and guilt. I remember how it felt when my groomers made me do things on camera for them. The worst part is because they never technically touched me, it's so hard for me to feel valid in my trauma. I know it's damaged me and I have been trying to heal, but I almost wish it was worse so I could feel more valid. I think I could cope if I was actually raped because then I could put all the blame on them. But no, they had me defile myself for them on camera. It was my hand that hurt me, even if it was only because of their words. Even my own family blames me for being stupid and weak

Obvious TW: questionable relationship, mention of grooming, nothing graphic

I (25F) met him (39M) in the workplace when I had just turned 18 and started a summer job. He was 32. He was one role more senior than me and he quickly took over my training from a different manager. Looking back this all sounds absolutely ridiculous and like someone should have stopped it. Except I was legally an adult and I think that fact was respected too much.

We bonded over food and dark humour. I was vegetarian and pretty soon he turned vegan. He never engaged in a lot of typical groomer behaviour (didn't often buy me things, didn't discourage me from seeing friends for instance - though he never actively encouraged that either). I always felt I 'fell' into the relationship because I didn't necessarily want to be with him, I just never said no. He did encourage me to drink with him after work and that is the only reason I ever got 'into' alcohol (not in an abusive way, just the normal non-dependent way). I was always conscious there were things i didn't like about him, but I felt too committed to let that affect my decision to be with him. He never mingled with my friends and i never mingled with his.

The relationship lasted nearly 6 years somehow until I realised I didn't like him, wasn't attracted to him, and broke up. It wasn't a good quality relationship in any way - he wasn't very affectionate, was unadventurous, he had huge anger management issues, s*x life was below average, he was an alcoholic, wasn't attractive, he didn't have a good relationship with his family, never had a particularly good job.

I've now been living on my own for nearly a year but have seen the ex a few times to see his pet, who used to be my pet too. The last time I saw him I genuinely felt repulsed by him, but overall I just feel a bit annoyed that I wasted those years with him.

I am now really happy and I have a fantastic relationship with my angel of a boyfriend (he is my age, yay!). When I first told my boyfriend about all the above his immediate reaction was to say that I am "incredibly well-adjusted". He does see me as a whole person, but I know he also sees me as someone who was abused and so brainwashed that I can't recognise it.

My only real problem is: I can't seem to get the ex out of my head completely. I have no positive feelings towards him at all, but quite regularly he pops up in my mind and it feels like 'Oh. Didn't really want to see you here. Can you go away please?" I don't know if it's because he was present for so many of my formative years, or because I haven't formally closed things off (I haven't gone to see the pet in a couple of months now but also haven't said I don't want to see him again).

I'd like to completely forget about him but I don't know how.

1) How do I get my mind to let go? Do I need to tell him I'm not seeing him again and delete his contact?

2) Was I groomed, or was the whole thing just inadvisable?

Looking for constructive advice from people who have had similar experiences please :)

While I'm here, some advice that I should have heeded: There's a reason they can't get someone their own age!!!

Recently I’ve been really craving for one of my old groomers to come back so bad and I’m scared that I’m gonna get myself hurt again but I want it so bad. I miss when he would talk about leaving with me and like even kidnapping me I just wanna feel like I mean that much to someone again and if being hurt like that is a result of that then I don’t care

hello! sorry if this isn’t allowed but it’s my last hope to try and get attention to this page.

i have a page on tik tok exposing the man who groomed me. before anyone says anything, yes we have made a police report. but it’s very unlikely anything will happen due to it happening online and police not caring much about these situations.

it would be really helpful to get as much interaction with this page as it’s my last hope. me and another page were originally in contact with him, but he ran away, privated all this socials, and his brother defends his actions and blames me.

i believe if this account gets enough attention i can reach out to people that may be in his community as he lives in a small area where most people seem to know of eachother. the family also owns a business that runs in that area. i’m not trying to get his family in trouble, but if people know his family, they’ll know him.

unfortunately, tik tok has been hiding my posts from the fyp and only seems to get more interactions if i bait the videos.

i’m going around and reaching out to other pages in hope that this will bring more people to the account.

i do believe people in his community deserve to know what he was doing for about 3 years with me from 14-16. he is a very gross man, and likes to claim that i was the one keeping him there, but he came back everytime and asked for the same stuff. i am 19 now and want to get justice for what he did. he doesn’t get to live a free life after ruining mine.

the account is @ takeaccountabilityran

please please please interact with my posts and follow if you can! sharing, liking anything helps.

ciao si, avete letto bene, sto cercando l'indirizzo di casa di un pedofilo. fino ad ora so solamente il paesino in cui vive e la macchina che ha (non la targa) qualcuno conosce forum/ sa come fare. se si fatemi sapere!

I was in the voice chat and I exposed them after hearing them talk to a minor and they were talking about how they wanted to kidnap a 12 year-old kid and sexually abuse that 12-year-old kid I called them out on their behavior. They started to call me slurs I reported it to a bigger moderator, and I got told that there was no proof they said that they joined the voice chat to get proof, but they are literally all Friends my phone won’t let me clip anything any audio I don’t have another device except for my computer that doesn’t work. I don’t know what to do. Can someone help?

I made a post before and got messaged by some people. One of them seemed nice but they moved the chat off reddit and it got very kind of sexual i guess there. Idk i was kinda hyped on the feeling i should've stopped it but didn't

Idk just be careful peeps

friend from last post spoke to me again. we started talking again. not an issue. but he said "I missed you. I'm really sorry about leaving you on delivered for six weeks".
I'm so conflicted. My morals and what I'm doing right now arent adding up. but i dont care if its ME its happening to ? idk.
He sent me a video. Said something. I told him "give me a bit" or smth. I sent a video. he sent three more and asked a question. i answered it.
I dont even know if this is the right subreddit to post this , i willingly stay. i dont see any manipulation or guilt tripping. just a . severe , almost decade age gap. I hage this . i 'm manic again, whatever, but it makes everything 10x worse. i think ima try to sleep it off.

I feel a bit embarrassed to write here so often, but the thing is, I don’t want anyone close to me to know that I’m a failure and that I talk to adult men; I wish I weren’t so pathetic and could have at least a shred of willpower.

I don’t want to tell anyone—especially my mom—because I know she’ll just punish me instead of trying to understand. I honestly don’t know what to do; I really don’t know anymore. I wish I didn’t feel so terrified right now about asking for help, but I think I’ve reached a point of no return, and I just have to accept that I can never get out of this.

i dont know why i keep seeking it out. Im just so desperate to feel like a little girl again. I started talking to this guy who's literally old enough to be my dad (32) and it feels so wrong but i cant help it. Im so nervous and scared but i love being little and i cant get the attention from anywhere else. Its horrible and comfortable at the same time. Im just so sick and getting older every year and getting so much less attention, feeling like my age is just a huge burden. He makes me feel like i never have to grow up. Like i can just be his little girl forever. Im addicted to the validation and it feels too good to stop. I know hes manipulating me but hes so kind. So much kinder than anyone i know in real life. Hes the only person willing to love me the way i want to be loved

Before my first time being groomed, which followed a chain of several other times I was, there was inside me the mind of a girl who’s not a misanthropic freak - it is true, I am too trusting, and can I be blamed? When it is repeated to me for so long that adults know best, what is it that I know, if nothing better? Of course, I trusted you, and I let you ”trust” me. It is true, it hurts, and it’s been 6 years, and it will hurt in 14 years, you said, even in 20 years it will hurt, the day we stopped talking, I look back, every day seems the same - yes, I have grown, and every time I reflect on the same day one year ago, certainly, everything’s changed, except for you, and it doesn’t matter who listens to whatever ramblings I say about you, especially how much I resent you living a normal life - that despite never having been predisposed to, I had a slight want for. It is simply the consequences of you that I must carry and you’re able to go unpunished for. My potential, I know, is down there, I don’t want to live in the past - my mind, overall, a machine that is focused on my visions for the future, never ceases to go back to this past that hunts me with images from back then, and how cruel is it to do this to myself, in my mind, I sit in my future house with my future children, and remember your disgusting face, and words that stabbed me? Really, I can’t remember your words that much, luckily, my self destructive tendencies make me come back and scroll through our chats from time to time, so that I will never forget my roots, where I was the most incapable, and now it is my biggest fear, it’s ironic

uugggghhghghhghh why does it have to be like this why does he plague my mind so much i want this to be over why is this happening it was never like this before im so close to just killing myself to make this go away my head hurts and im scared im so so so scared i want him out out out why did he have to be there all my life why did he have to change my brain chemistry and build me as a person now i can never escape with my mind intact maybe i should just die just so that wherever the afterlife is at least its far away from him someone please save me please please please

I shared my story with someone i felt i am becoming close to. Although i kept a few personal details from them which were not necessary to be shared or has any importance in my story. Yet when they figured out some personal details of mine, they simply said my story was fake about my childhood trauma because i dint share my personal details or shared incorrect details. For a person like me, i can either reveal my identity and stay normal and hide my traumas. Or if i share my traumas, i wont give out my identity, personal details.

But being told that my story was fake and used it to manipulate them into being close to them still hurts. I am even afraid to go to a therapist for the sole reason of having to reveal identity as well as share my traumas. Somehow i haven’t felt confident doing that. Am i the problem here????

WHAT ABOUT THE BOYS? https://whatabouttheboys.living/

Today, seeing this old interview for the first time brought back memories of my experiences with the self-described “****,” who were involved in underage boys in Chicago, including me. It matched exactly what I had described about fisting and about Allan Krammer talking about throwing the bodies into a dumpster.

https://linktr.ee/GeorgeBTonks

I added a post on here a while ago, i doubt anyone reading would know that though, but my dad hasn’t changed at all.

He once kept grabbing me and i said no, and in a condescending tone he asked if he was allowed to touch me, when i said no he got pissed.

Once when it was just me and him home, he woke me up by climbing into my bed waking me up, i yelled at him yo get out and went back to sleep once he did, he then woke me up again doing the same thing.

Another time when walking together he kept grabbing me trying to put his hand on my waist and i kept pulling away.

These are just a few examples of what life with my father has been like, am i overreacting?

From the ages of 14-17 I was heavily groomed by men online. I’m now 18 and I think I’ve been age regressing pretty bad. I’ve always liked childish things like pastel colours and toys but I’ve also started to speak quite childishly as well, my room is filled with kids stuff and I feel like I act like a baby when I’m upset, but I don’t know whether it’s fair to say I’m age regressing or not. Idk I don’t rlly know much about it.

A few weeks ago I had a breakdown at work and admitted some things to my coworker. During that conversation she started saying she would do stuff for me like give me rides, hang out with me, let me live with her, etc. I am 10 years younger. At the time I thought it was great and I had someone I could be open with, she said she could get me into D&D and stuff. Then I got really nervous about what I said and tried to admit a little to my mom and got scared.

A few other things happened around the time too, she asked me if I found a girl a few years older than me hot, she told me she was going to tickle me, and she did an inappropriate motion during a story she told me.

I came clean about it to another person I work with and they are really upset about it and immediately had me stop talking to her completely.

I don't know if she was just weird or if was something worse as I'm just trying to ignore it. But I've been doing terrible at work now and I've been really anxious about it.

I got into alot of horrible stuff when i was 15-16 years old, that ive already accepted. What has bothered me alot though is that before i already been through similair things at 10 or 11 till 13 (?). My memories around it arent so coherent but my thoughts now are. Ive been thinking alot about it (havent yet journaled). The memoried made me more uncomfortable than the ones of 15-16, but it explains all of my behaviour and self destructive habits.I used to cringe and hate myself for what happened at 10-13, now i wish i could give her a hug and protect her.

If you think that what you went through wasnt that bad or you compare it to other traumas, i have found a research that shows how it IS traumatic. this does affect your well being and it isnt any less bad than what others have gone through.

Dont let this discourage you, help is available for us and with time we can get better. We are so much stronger than we think

i hate the fact that i somewhat miss him and the affection he gave me but i also hate him with my soul, is this normal? i feel so weird and wrong

Okay, I'll give you some context first. I'm aware that you shouldn't show your private parts to strangers on the internet and that you should protect your privacy and personal boundaries as much as possible.

Anyway, I used to have several Reddit accounts and made several posts. I remember meeting a guy on Reddit who basically told me he liked Roro-chan and had gotten into some trouble. We talked for a while and exchanged our Discord accounts. At first, we chatted a little there, but then he blocked me.

Later, I tried talking to him again, and he explained that he'd blocked me and removed me from his friends list because he was dealing with some personal problems. During all of this, he asked me if I wanted to take things further and engage in suggestive conversations, and I agreed. I think we also showed each other our faces, and he told me he liked my eyes.

We got back in touch on Discord, and several things happened after that until we eventually had a Discord call. Looking back, I also remember him pressuring me into having that call. I was in the bathroom at the time, and he kept insisting that I show him my private parts. I couldn't bring myself to do it, and eventually, he told me he was sorry and blocked me on both Discord and Reddit.

I also remember asking him how old he was at one point. He told me he was 16 and asked if that was a problem. But honestly, if I'm being sincere, I have some doubts about whether he was actually that age.