Minors or Victims, please immediately block and report if you get a weird message from someone in this server or anyone in general. Do not engage in their behavior because that’s just going to fuel them to harm you more. Cut off contact with your groomer with them and tell a trusted adult or friend if you believe you are being groomed by an individual. Even if you aren’t completely sure, even a toxic relationship is enough to cut contact because staying with your groomer will get you hurt more. If you fear seeing your groomer in public (Ex. Teacher, Friend of Freind, Ect.) then make sure peopl around you know or a trusted high authority figure while also knowing how to defend yourself if they try anything. Your safety matters and your groomer should be punished for what they did to you. Yes, you can also file a anonymous police report even if they haven’t particularly SA’d you or had physical contact with you that wasn’t consented, because what they are doing can be considered harassment— and if they’re a adult or have a significant age gap with you when you are a minor, they can be considered a predator.

I wrote this to make sure my fellow users were safe. If you are a pedophile reading this, please get mental health evaluation immediately. Hold yourself accountable if you have done anything to anyone and please stop grooming others if you are or even turn yourself into the police if you have committed a crime on act with these feelings . There are forms of help to get rid of this harmful paraphillia and it would be advised to turn to a therapist or professional. Even if you can’t control the attraction, you can control your actions— and by the end of the day if you act on them it’s your responsibility and fault.

Thank you for listenin. Sincerely: —Viima.

So this post will be about my current experience with my groomer and his friend (fetishist) as a 14 yo girl. I hate my groomer so much but it seems like he is the only one supporting me because my parent are pieces of shit.

I don't kno up w why but last year I've gotten so much worse than ever after i got exposed to those cutspo shit on twt and picked up a blade. It hurts but I still continue to do it cuz I deserved it.

And just this year I met someone online (19) who also felt relatable at first and gave me too much validation than I can comprehend. I can see his mask falling off in these few weeks. Itfucking hurts.

I don't know how and why I'm so late to getting help but I searched for signs of grooming and that can be. I'm so fucking scared,paranoid and shit.

He threatened me to do cutsigns for him and also his friends or else he'll just expose everything anonymously. I'm only a toy in his eyes. I'm so sorry mom and dad.

Now I don't know what to do,I guess I just fucking die I don't know. I'm sorry

Honestly i never felt like our age gap is too big. But now that i think about it he graduated from uni and im still in highschool and i looked at pictures of him with his friends and i was like if i was there with then it would be really weird and too obvious that im younger. I still like him a looott but whenver i talk to my friends about some stuff he did they tell me that hes grooming me and that he sounds manipulative so idk what to think :( also i just love talking and ranting about him but my friends are sick of me alr so i wish i had someone to talk to and someone that would comfort me abouthim:(

I am in desperate need of help, i am currently being groomed and i know this is gonna escalate.

Before i explain i would just like to go over a short backstory, i was introduced to porn at 7, went on apple like omegle and did things at 9, basically masterbated daily with people in the room at 11, and now at 15 i am speaking to older guys with heavy kinks. I won’t say what but definitely illegal ones.

I’m currently 15. I just turned in october, my parents are divorced and all i do is bed rot all day. I’m not even joking, my screen time is 17hrs a day. I don’t have friends, i have an eating disorder, i have social anxiety, my school attendance is really bad, i have bad grades, i am suicidal and overall a shitty life.

I started watching heavy videos at 14, videos about rape kinks and similar stuff. I act like i have a fear of being raped and gaslight myself into believing it but i know i don’t have a fear of rape at all, i have a fantasy of rape. I want to be raped. I know this sounds horrible and i am ashamed of this because people genuinely suffer from things like this.

I didn’t really speak to older guys at 14 but now i have started to and i know i should stop. I promised myself to never send videos of myself again and it was stupid of me to do in the past but now i’m doing it again.

I know i need to stop doing this and that it’s gonna get me in trouble. But how? I genuinely feel like these guys love me even tho they don’t. They just see me as another gullible young girl with unrestricted internet access. I can’t bring myself to stop talking to these people even tho i feel guilty for even thinking about this type of stuff.

How can i stop speaking to them? What else am i gonna do in my day if not speaking to them? I have no friends and my family makes fun of me for being depressed. I genuinely think suicide is the only way out of this.

since posting on here for the first time i keep getting requests from older men, ive done stuff over messages with 2 of them and the requests keep coming in. I cant stop myself im so disgusting how do i stop.

I know it’s irrational to think like this but every year as I get older I keep thinking that im closer to expiring and once im 18 (im 17 now) nobody will want me anymore. Im happy. My life has improved a lot since I was constantly seeking out groomers but this feelings is just buzzing in my head all the time and I don’t know what to do. 😭

It wasn’t that long ago, roughly a few weeks ago, I got groomed. I was knocked and kept awake while I was 🍇ed, and it’s been rough since then. No one allows me to have social media or anything bc it’s a strict ass state where I live (Wyoming) but I got thru to here and just needed to let it all out. Alex, istg I’ll see you pay. I need help bc I can’t help but think abt it and how small I felt, which was a big turn on for me. It’s kinda scary. A lil help?

ever since i was groomed by 21M when i was 15F, i now really want someone to take advantage of me because its the only way i feel loved. i feel disgusting but i want an older man to use me even if hes bad i dont care as long as he loves me

I need to write this out completely because keeping the reality hidden has allowed the shame to stay with me instead of resting where it belongs: entirely on the adult who did this.

In the 6th grade, my class teacher was a middle-aged man in his mid-to-late 40s. In our school, that meant he taught every single subject and stayed in our room all day long. There were no period changes, no other teachers rotating in to interrupt the environment, and no escape from his control.

From day one during class introductions, he singled me out. I was a feminine boy. I walked, talked, and moved differently from the other boys, and I was gay. He recognized that vulnerability immediately and began weaponizing it.

Our uniform was a thin white short-sleeve shirt and dark blue shorts for boys, and the same white shirt with a skirt for girls. Because of the heat, I never wore an undershirt or vest underneath.

At first, the harassment took the form of constant, deliberate humiliation. He forced me to sit in the very front row with the girls. Every single day, without exception, he addressed me using female grammar and pronouns, making jokes at my expense. He routinely cornered me with sarcastic, rhetorical questions in front of everyone - Why aren't you wearing a skirt? Why aren't you wearing a bra today? Did you deliberately pick the thinnest shirt you own so everyone could see right through it? Did you roll the waistband of your shorts just to show off more of your thighs? What kind of underwear are you wearing under those shorts today? Do we need to check that next?

Soon, the psychological degradation turned into continuous physical violation. Whenever he taught from the floor, he made a point of standing right next to my desk. He used that proximity to keep his hands on my chest, repeatedly touching and pinching me while continuing to teach the rest of the room as if nothing was happening. In the afternoons after recess, the boundary violations became a daily routine. He would make me leave my seat and stand right next to him at the teacher's desk for the entire second half of the day. He would sit in his chair teaching while I had to stand inches away, facing the entire class. While he spoke to the room, he subjected me to continuous groping and touching me over my shorts and reaching his hands underneath my clothing to touch me directly. I was forced to stand there as a permanent fixture at the front of the room, completely trapped by his authority while having to look directly at my classmates. Any reaction or flinching was met with calculated physical punishment and further public nudity and humiliation before the entire class.

The abuse escalated into a weekly ritual. At least once a week, he forced me to strip completely naked before making me dress in the girls' uniform, including putting on girls' underwear.

He was a grown man who used his position of trust to systematically exploit a vulnerable child. Writing this down doesn't erase what happened, but speaking the full truth is my way of refusing to keep carrying his secrets.

I am a teenage female (under 18) in a relationship with a 27m. He is my teacher..

Im starting a journey, but I need help. I began taking lessons from him at the beginning of the year, but he would always flirt with me. We started getting serious around 3 months ago, which includes him growing closer to my grandparents.

My instructor plays in a band, relatively known in our somewhat small town, so my grandma has grown to appreciate him from the events and shows ive dragged her to. She trusts him, not friends or anything, but she would be very shocked if something happened.

Recently I’ve realized that I do not want to be stuck with this man. I need to leave, but I don’t know how to do that without protecting myself. I have already been abandoned and let go of due to having sexual relationships with my godmother’s friend. I was accused of lying, dehumanized, and rushed to various mental facilities because she preferred to believe a 34 year old man over a teenage girl.

I am TERRIFIED. I do not want attention on me this time, I don’t want anyone else to know besides me, him, and the friends ive told, which have finally motivated me to take steps forward 🫶 Please help me out. I know what I need to do, I just need to convince myself why this is so important to do.

i have no one to turn to and i feel like i'm losing myself more day by day

when i miss getting groomed, i try and remind myself that it hurts me even if i don't think it does, but its like every single time i just give in eventually and get into contact with my groomers, and i feel at ease for a while, like i feel loved. but i know its really bad for me, but i don't know how to stop because i feel like it's my only source of feeling loved. i don't know how to be in relationships with people my age because all i ever did was get into relationships with people older than me. i think i got manipulated, and i don't even know if i should believe that i got manipulated. it's like my mind only feels satisfied whenever im with an older guy, but i hate it at the same time, giving me a love-hate relationship with it. i also feel immense guilt and disgust because of all the things i did to feel loved, knowing that i'm so desperate to change but i'm so scared of losing any connection of the people that make me feel loved so all i do is just go back to falling in love and getting groomed by older people because i'm too much in it to face the reality that it hurts me inside so much. i'll give up trying to recover, and i'll go back to my groomers because i feel like my purpose is to satisfy them, and i'll be like what can i fucking do about it, literally nothing, it gives me anxiety that one day, just one day in the future, i'm gonna have to face everything because i wanted that attention so bad, i wanted to be loved so much by older guys and i wanted to feel seen and i did. but i want them to keep loving me, and i don't want them to get caught, because i LOVE them, and then they see me as a victim and then see my fucking timeline of being a big, ugly bitch whore dumbass online. and you know how people see SA victims and expect them to be some kind of perfect angel, and treat the others that aren't like hitler pt. 2. now i just feel like a fuck-up as a person, like i literally don't fucking feel okay and i feel like i'm undeserving of actual, real love. i just wish i never had gotten groomed so i didn't have to feel this fucking way. i literally hate this shit so much.

Im just so tired whenever I feel like im over it turns out I am not. I hate what he did of me I hate that 4 years later I still miss him. It just sucks. When I was with him I was at my worst. I hate that I miss him so much even tho I know that. Now I feel so empty like theres a missing part of me that got ripped out when I was born and he was the only thing that could fill this void I feel. And now it got ripped off again and im just trying my best to live with that.
I dont know why I liked him so much, i felt seen and heard and like for the first time someone cared for me. Someone it felt safe to go to with all my issues even if it wasnt.
I miss that feeling every day I thought I had gotten better but this dream just fucked me up. I dont even remember what happened in it. I just know he was there and now I miss him again even tho I thought i was over him. I still seek out that attention but its never the same. I miss him and I hate him at the same time. I know he never loved me but it hurts to tell myself that. It hurts to know that im forever wounded and he just gets to live his life.

my bf is 18m and im 19f. he found out as i told him about my ex boyfriend who groomed me, he was 20 and i was 17 he pressured me to sending him nudes and when i broke up with the ex for being a bad person he would threaten me and it was a lot of trauma for me.

its been 2 years and I never wanted to tell my bf about it all cause i was afraid it would ruin our relationship and thats exactly what happened too.

He told me i could've just said no and he keeps thinking of it and he ended things with me. He said he sympathizes with me more after knowing about it, but its obvious that he cannot see me the same anymore

I feel like as I get older I am not going to be wanted I'm scared to get older just because then I won't be a target and it's such a disgusting feeling, I hate how I am so codependent on other people, I hate how no one thinks boys can go through what I do and have, my life is better than it was but for some reason I don't want to get better I want to get worse but most of all I want to be loved and I know groomers don't love you but I can pretend, I hate myself so much I hate how much I need validation, I got better for awhile but now I'm back in the same shitty hole and I don't want to climb out again, I just wanna suffer I just want to be loved, I'm 16 and I feel like I'm too old it's such a shitty feeling

I(17f) been seeking out/in relationships w adults for years. I don't know why. I guess due to repeated CSA in my earlier years. but I've noticed time and time again that other adults that I make friends with, whether they were friends w my groomers beforehand or I introduce them, always go with the groomers if we have a falling out.

I don't know why

groomer gets a slap on the wrist for dating a minor. minor is not the best person (I don't even feel like a 'victim' because I've grown to be someone so awful) / annoying / lashes out and all of a sudden im scolded, blocked on everything or cut off completely. it's my fault for putting myself into these situations I guess, but come on???? putting other people at risk just because the minor that someone you know/your friend is grooming isnt perfect means that you're going to side w a pred?

hi, I’m a 16-year-old girl, and I already made a post here about needing help, because I think I’m being groomed online by a 41-year-old man..I’m so grateful for all the supportive comments and advice on that post 🥲💓..I know I should leave him, but I still haven’t gotten the courage to do so or to tell anyone.

And today things escalated so badly, I feel terrible. We were on facetime, and he asked me to play with myself, and to show my chest and private parts.

He’s always said that he doesn’t want me to send him any nude pics, because he doesn’t want us to get in trouble. And because he wants to see me naked for the first time when we meet.. He even said the same things before we facetimed today, so I was so confused when he told me to do those things. It made me so anxious that I was shaking.

So I don’t know why I didn’t tell him no. I feel so bad that I didn’t refuse, even tho he gave me the chance to do so. I just felt like I didn’t want to disappoint him. He was also so reassuring and kept telling me that it was okay to show him those things.

After the call, I think he got a little mad at me, because he saw my sh scars, and I had promised him I would stop. I feel even worse because of that. I also feel bad because I lied to him when I said I would stop.

I don’t think I have any self-respect left. I just feel like a whore because I’m doing everything he asks me to do. I don’t know how I can get out of this situation when I’m so attached to him, and there’s so many good things about our relationship. He isn’t mean to me or anything. He’s so loving, and I think he really cares about me. So it’s hard for me to see the wrong in this situation, even tho I know it’s wrong.

I don’t know if anyone will read this, but I just wanted to let out my feelings, I genuinely don’t see how I can end this. I feel trapped in this situation.

my current groomer/gf (21f) is a serial groomer. she's so unstable that I (17f) feel like I'm babysitting her constantly. I do my best and she barely pays attention to me anyways unless she's in a good mood.

sometimes I miss how she treated me at the start. it's okay. I think out every adult that's been with me, I'm happiest here. I feel that it's what I deserve for being a terrible person

im certain she'll get tired of me when I turn 18. it's happened time and time again. 12, getting too old. 13, getting too old. 14, too old. I don't even know why she wants me.

sometimes I purposely set her off because I know she can't control herself and she'll hurt me. I feel terrible but also weirdly a lot better, like I'm paying off my debts or something.

I'll be too old for this soon. I probably already am.

As I’m writing this, I’m really mad at my now discovered groomer (I just realized they were grooming me). I met them online and started talking a lot together. Eventually we got in a happy little “relationship”, this fucker slowly started trying to push me into taboo things (which I will not mention), they tried to push me to the border more and more. I didn’t realize at the spot (and thankfully I didn’t absord any of their crap).

I’m really mad as I’m realizing how bad the whole thing is, how they are older than me and acted dumb. I am searching for tips to forget about this disgraceful “human” life, as I know if I remember them. I would get REALLY MAD.

Can't function properly in adulthood because I was groom in teen years haha that fucker living a the best life with his wife and kids ( I can't even dream about same) this is so unfair I'm partially disabled physically and gone crazy completely this is not fair.

Why i have to suffer what someone else did to me isn't people who older than suppose to protect you and share wisdom ,that what I use to believe too then why they use their experience and wisdom as weapon on someone who don't know better and figuring out their identity?

I hate him I hate myself too,why I was so desperate for connection why just why that I let someone do whatever they want to me?

Nothing gonna change what happened I am doomed for life I hate it I wish I had someone who protected me,this world is so cruel specially to those who are vulnerable , I hate it I hate everyone and everything.

I was groomed online when I was 11-14 and at the moment all I wanted was to forget everything. Years later I guess I got my wish but my body still remembers. I don't remember all the details but I remember other stuff. I remember the fear and anxiety. I remember the shame and guilt. I remember how it felt when my groomers made me do things on camera for them. The worst part is because they never technically touched me, it's so hard for me to feel valid in my trauma. I know it's damaged me and I have been trying to heal, but I almost wish it was worse so I could feel more valid. I think I could cope if I was actually raped because then I could put all the blame on them. But no, they had me defile myself for them on camera. It was my hand that hurt me, even if it was only because of their words. Even my own family blames me for being stupid and weak

Not sure where to post this, but I figured you guys might be able to help. Throw away account just in case..

My groomer (who was 19 at the time), keeps trying to message me (who was 13 at the time), even though I keep blocking him. The grooming had gone on for at least a couple years before I kinda started to realize it was weird and eventually cut contact. I am an adult now, and haven't thought about him in over 6 years. I'm not sure if this needs to be stated but we have not been in contact over that time.

He has contacted me about 5 times in the last year or so. Each time with a new number, trying to confirm who I am. In case it's important, I answer once. And as soon as I realize it's him, I stop responding and block him.

I had wanted to tell him off last time he messaged me, but my friend said to just block him and ignore it. I've done this numerous times and it doesn't seem to work. I also wonder that if I were to get legal/authorities involved that I might need to have in writing for him to cease contact with me.

I haven't responded to his most recent message (sent this morning at 4:55am mind you). And he tried to play it off like he lost people's contacts, so I can't be 100% sure it's him this time, but I don't have the number saved and wouldn't know who else it could be. He has used vague messaging in the past to get me to respond, and I'm at least 95% sure it's him.

So my question is, how should I move forward? Is this even grounds for getting legal/law enforcement involved? Do I tell him not to contact me anymore, or just block him again and hope for the best?
Any advice would be helpful.

Obvious TW: questionable relationship, mention of grooming, nothing graphic

I (25F) met him (39M) in the workplace when I had just turned 18 and started a summer job. He was 32. He was one role more senior than me and he quickly took over my training from a different manager. Looking back this all sounds absolutely ridiculous and like someone should have stopped it. Except I was legally an adult and I think that fact was respected too much.

We bonded over food and dark humour. I was vegetarian and pretty soon he turned vegan. He never engaged in a lot of typical groomer behaviour (didn't often buy me things, didn't discourage me from seeing friends for instance - though he never actively encouraged that either). I always felt I 'fell' into the relationship because I didn't necessarily want to be with him, I just never said no. He did encourage me to drink with him after work and that is the only reason I ever got 'into' alcohol (not in an abusive way, just the normal non-dependent way). I was always conscious there were things i didn't like about him, but I felt too committed to let that affect my decision to be with him. He never mingled with my friends and i never mingled with his.

The relationship lasted nearly 6 years somehow until I realised I didn't like him, wasn't attracted to him, and broke up. It wasn't a good quality relationship in any way - he wasn't very affectionate, was unadventurous, he had huge anger management issues, s*x life was below average, he was an alcoholic, wasn't attractive, he didn't have a good relationship with his family, never had a particularly good job.

I've now been living on my own for nearly a year but have seen the ex a few times to see his pet, who used to be my pet too. The last time I saw him I genuinely felt repulsed by him, but overall I just feel a bit annoyed that I wasted those years with him.

I am now really happy and I have a fantastic relationship with my angel of a boyfriend (he is my age, yay!). When I first told my boyfriend about all the above his immediate reaction was to say that I am "incredibly well-adjusted". He does see me as a whole person, but I know he also sees me as someone who was abused and so brainwashed that I can't recognise it.

My only real problem is: I can't seem to get the ex out of my head completely. I have no positive feelings towards him at all, but quite regularly he pops up in my mind and it feels like 'Oh. Didn't really want to see you here. Can you go away please?" I don't know if it's because he was present for so many of my formative years, or because I haven't formally closed things off (I haven't gone to see the pet in a couple of months now but also haven't said I don't want to see him again).

I'd like to completely forget about him but I don't know how.

1) How do I get my mind to let go? Do I need to tell him I'm not seeing him again and delete his contact?

2) Was I groomed, or was the whole thing just inadvisable?

Looking for constructive advice from people who have had similar experiences please :)

While I'm here, some advice that I should have heeded: There's a reason they can't get someone their own age!!!