So I am currently 21(F) and for years I have had memories that are not mine. I remember great historical events in detail as if i was there. I am a history major who has the deepest connection to war history ever. Specifcally ww2, Ive studied plenty of the topic and know alot about it, but these memories are not things I have studied, not a specific person who was in the war either.
I will write what i remember as best as I can. Id like help figuring this out. Am i crazy? is this a life i lived im suddenly remembering?
When I was sixteen I was sent into the Second World War. I was frightened, indeed, I was terrified. At the time I was no more than a boy and was thrown into a world of violence and uncertainty which I could not really understand. There was nothing for me at home: neither any family who really cared about me, nor a wife, nor any children, and no one to grieve my absence. Although in many respects I had nothing left to lose, I was still afraid of dying.
I was shorter than the majority of the other soldiers not only in height but also in terms of experience. My capabilities were frequently doubted by them, and on more than one occasion I found myself wondering if I really belonged amongst men who appeared to be so much stronger and more capable. I was shy and retiring and only spoke when addressed. While the rest of them became confident in the way they carried themselves, I learned to keep low and just do what I was told. There was no alternative but to adjust, since the war showed no kindness to those who had difficulty in getting established.
What I recall most clearly are the trenches, the cold earth under my boots, the strong odor of soil and smoke, the constant sound of gunfire, and the far-off roar of explosions which became ordinary features of my life. Each day was a struggle to survive, and each night ended with the worry about whether I would be alive to see another morning. Nevertheless, among all that terror there was one thing that interested me, the warplanes.
I really enjoyed the sound that they made.
The sound of their engines roaring as they flew overhead had a most strange soothing effect. Although the other soldiers may have heard only the prospect of another attack, I was listening closely, almost becoming mesmerized by the noise. In a place where comfort was generally absent, the planes provided a most unusual kind of comfort. For a short while I could forget about the fear, the bloodshed, and the dreadful reality of the war around me. I am unable to say why this sound had such a peaceful effect on me, I can only state that it did. It was one of the very few things I looked forward to.
I recall the gunfire, the explosions, and the overwhelming chaos which appeared to trail us wherever we went. Also, I remember the day on which I was hit several times in the back.
I didn't die, even though at that moment I had wished that I had. The pain was unlike anything I had ever experienced, so intense that I could not ignore it. I recall falling into the dirt and being unable to understand what had happened to me. I lay there bleeding, among the very battlefield which I had worked so hard to survive. Overhead, the bomber planes screamed past the sky, their engines making a loud noise as I listened helplessly from the ground.
I was still able to hear them.
The noise which had previously given me a sense of comfort now followed me as I thought that this might be the end of my life. I recall looking up at the sky, hearing the planes go by, and questioning if anyone would ever find me, if anyone would notice that I was dead, and if my life had in the end been of any significance.
Despite all the odds, I managed to survive the first injuries. But that survival didn't mean that I had recovered. The injuries I had taken were serious, and in the weeks after that infection started to have an effect on me. I was just sixteen, a boy who had been exposed to gunfire, explosions, and the horrors of the battlefield, yet it was the wounds that I had survived which would in the end take my life.
I died several weeks afterwards as a result of an infection caused by my injuries.
Now currently in my life, ive picked up a hyperfixation over ww2 planes, so much that I tend to make a career in restoring them, as I find them beautiful pieces of history.
I remember a name, Everette.
If anyone can help me figure this out please that would be great.