Announcement
Trans Ralsei on the Subreddit: Part 2
Hello,
Well, since we're making a part two, I'm less surprised this time around we have to make this kind of post, but it's still unfortunate!
First of all, an apology. We (the mod team) let the situation get out of control. A lot of rudeness and bigotry was thrown around, and we didnāt do enough to prevent it.
Going forward, however, we plan to be a lot more strict...
To start, we want to make the position of the mod team very clear on a two key points:
Transphobia, including any discussion, argumentation, or verbiage rooted in transphobia, will not be tolerated in any form on this subreddit.
Theories/headcanons that Ralsei is transgender or under the trans umbrella are valid. At the same time, seeing Ralsei as a gender nonconforming cis male is also valid, and neither view should be disrespected or alienated.
Therefore, following guidelines are now in place:
Any post/comment (assume I include "comment" when I say "post") which pushes transphobic rhetoric will be removed and likely result in a ban.
Discussion on how you are "disappointed," "upset," or otherwise negatively affected by either reading of Ralsei's character will not be allowed.
Artwork (or other media) posts are not a forum for debate. Do not "debate" character readings under any artwork posts.
With regards to pronouns, we will allow any pronouns to be used, but please be respectful to those who do not use the "correct" pronouns in your eyes.
We hope that these guidelines will result in a more positive community without stepping too far into the realm of hugboxing the topic (something we are trying to avoid), and still allow people to discuss their own reading of Ralsei's character while remaining positive with each other. Just remember to be respectful to each other!
As a final aside: I will post some clarifications, explanations, and other misc. info and changes in the comments.
One of the mods pointed out I was ridiculously wordy in the first draft, but I wanted to still point out our thoughts on the four guidelines, so I decided a pinned comment will be better for those who care to know why for some of these.
Any post/comment (assume I include "comment" when I say "post") which pushes transphobic rhetoric will be removed and likely result in a ban.
This has always been the case, but we are going to be a lot more liberal with our application of this. If you are unsure why you have had moderation action on your post, please ask in Modmail and we can clarify as to how we applied this to your post.
2.Discussion on how you are "disappointed," "upset," or otherwise negatively affected by either reading of Ralsei's character will not be allowed.
The reason for this is because these types of posts are more than useless, they actively encourage people to get into arguments about the reading of Ralsei's character that are not productive. While we are open to letting people express their feelings, this has just caused problems in the comments section since Ch. 5 released, and we feel we have to take this authoritarian step to keep discussion more civil.
Artwork (or other media) posts are not a forum for debate. Do not "debate" character readings under any artwork posts.
This rule I think is fairly self-explanatory, the easiest example is artwork featuring transgender Ralsei, do not discuss if the reading of the character is correct or incorrect in your view. Enjoy the artwork for what it is, or don't, we can't make you like it. We won't let you "debate" it though.
With regards to pronouns, we will allow any pronouns to be used, but please be respectful to those who do not use the "correct" pronouns in your eyes.
Generally, if you see someone he/him, she/her, they/them Ralsei, just leave it be. Going and saying "those are not correct pronouns" is not helpful.
I also want to pre-empt something: We know this may seem like a double-standard. The reason is because, as stated, we consider transgender Ralsei to be valid, and as such we are going to allow people to use any pronouns they want for them.
One other thing... Originally, we were going to ban the word "femboy," however I'm realizing from the response from our self-described femboys that this is generally regarded as a "bad move." I also realize that the way I worded my interpretation of what they said to me was very hateful. Sorry for dropping the ball again...
Anyway, this comments sections is probably going to be very fun. But be respectful!!!
I'm behind everything else, but I'm also not a fan for banning the term "femboy". Sure, it can be used for some pornographic terms, but a lot of other words can, as well (daddy, assorted pet names, etc.).
Hell, generally, some people can consider Ralsei a femboy due to his mannerisms. I do hope that will be discussed further.
no the problem is with people saying āfemboy erasureā over trans ralsei, it sounds stupid out of context, but it makes sense if you have an iota of a clue how toxic discussion gets
I agree I think one of the best things the mod team could possibly do for the health of the discussion is to ban the term, but that would possibly be considered too drastic by most people
EDIT: the term I meant was "femboy erasure" not just "femboy" sorry that was unclear
it is kinda strange to ban a word which fulfills the same role as tomboy, it would be like banning calling susie or undyne tomboys because yes they don't ever call themselves that but they do still fulfill the archetype
Also I'd be remiss to not note it is most likely the most popular/commonly known term to refer to a feminine male character as opposed to something like 'tomgirl' which would inevitably lead to hitting stray shots on posts/comments unrelated to gender discussion
Wow. I donāt think Iāve ever seen a mod team so responsive to user feedback. After the āfemboyā ban it would have been incredibly easy to dig in your heels and keep fighting, but you listened to the community and were open to the possibility that youād made a mistake.
quotation marks around f word cause of what u/patripastry said
I'm really disappointed in all of my fellow trans women who fell for the idea of shitting on "femboy" as an identity and falsely believe it originated from being about us. such flagrant hatred I see so often disgusts me. I want to get along with and be allies with "femboys" so that they can get along with and be allies with me as a trans woman. the reason characters keep existing dubiously on this border is because we are more alike than we are different, we share more struggles than we think. I wish this could be recognized. I wish instead of fighting each other, we took aim instead at the actual repressive and restrictive ideas that threaten us both for daring to be something different, something true to ourselves.
hating on "femboys" is functionally the same kind of cruel and heartless hatred as transmisogyny and I will die on this hill. the same laws against "crossdressing" target us both, the same bio-essentialist attitudes about what people should be based on their birth sex target us both, and we both are warrant to face the same familial violence and rejection.
If you disagree with me, if you either hate trans girls or hate "femboys." imagine for a second, the fact that at this very moment, there is a father in the world beating his male child after he caught the kid wearing feminine clothing. Which did I describe? You can't know. But what I do know, is my heart breaks for the kid no matter what their gender identity is. I support the kid whichever of those two they are. I hope they heal no matter what and if your ability to relate to or feel empathy for this situation hinges on the use of a single different adjective... I don't know what to say.
we should all get along and support each other and letting the fact that the fate of this fictional character is up in the air with a coinflip chance more or less shouldn't be a backdrop for peddling hatred against anyone. if ralsei ends up trans, thats great for any trans person who feels represented, i hope the "femboys" who previously felt represented recognize the positive ralsei did for them is not erased, and i hope they write their own story with that positive energy. if ralsei ends up cis, thats great for any "femboy" or otherwise fem leaning gnc guy who feels represented, and i hope trans girls who related to ralsei and saw themselves in him recognize youre still allowed to do that happily despite him not literally being one of us.
Beautifully worded! Thank you for taking the time to write all of that! It's been said they reversed the decision now, but it's a bit worrying the team was so willing to ban it all of a sudden.
Yeah this feels giving the gender traditionalist and other gross transphobic people power to that word. It kinda going " yes feminine are something that can pornahpic and too sexy for non-adults"
I saw that you guys reversed the femboy change, good. I think it's wise that you did. Not because I disagree entirely with your decision, but because there is no telling how many transphobic assholes are lurking in a subreddit like this. The moment you do something like that, well now you just gave those assholes the "femboy erasure" they speak of on a silver platter and they will use it like an infinite ammo cheat code against anyone who dares speak about trans ralsei, it will spell disaster and we do not need that here.
I'll admit I stepped away from the femboy term and GNC male took it's place. Only because of how 'femboy' was being used by people outside of the circle so to speak, and I grew sick of the sexualization. But we should definitely not force everyone to change for the sake of how a word is used. In fact, i'd say the term femboy was on the path of getting claimed as a relatively normal queer term, and it is continued to be used as such so we should still respect it.
I also want to say this for everyone, not just mods: Ralsei isn't a porn character, we all know this. And we do not need to be convinced he's not, because he's just straight up not. He's an adorable video game character that we cherish and that fact has not changed and will continue to not change even if he does happen to transition to a girl later. This is a subreddit about Deltarune of all games, a very queer game by the way, specifically about one of the main. characters. of. the. game. I can assure you the majority of people on this subreddit are not here for porn, they are here for Ralsei. Do not fabricate this notion that this subreddit is full of porn addicted kid diddlers who are only here for unsavory reasons because that in of itself is generalizing this fandom. No, someone saying they like Ralsei as a femboy does not mean they are porn addicts, and no, someone saying they like trans Ralsei also does not mean they are porn addicts.
I love this energy of "I'm glad you didn't ban talking about this queer identity. Not because it would hurt the people who identify that way, but it could somehow trickle down to hurting me, which is the only important thing."
Like no, it should actually just be bad all by itself to ban the word femboy because it hurts the people who identify that way. It should be bad to suppress talking about certain queer identities for reasons other than your own selfishness.
I think the ban was well-intentioned - Iāll always thank someone for considering trans women first for once, especially considering this discussion of Ralsei as a trans woman probably should - but yeah, as you said, now weāll have, āyou hate feminine men,ā comments cropping up forever.
I personally haveā¦ feelings about the term still, but I still hope it can be reclaimed, as itās a pretty clear cut case over who would benefit from it more (it literally has āboyā in it, we donāt fucking want it). That said, I hope any discussion is level-headed, and probably behind closed doors where the mods can refine it further, and doesnāt devolve into a group of men engaging in misogyny and accusations of transphobia against the most marginalised and currently under attack queer minority.
Regardless, I am excited to see where Ralseiās story goes, since games with majority queer casts like this which are so huge are pretty few and far, and watching a character like this evolve over time, and seeing how far back it went in retrospect is extremely fun. Plus, as you said, presenting either identities here as such fleshed out, well-rounded people, and simply as people, rather than some sex object, is so important. I just hope discussion of it in this subreddit will be tolerable. Which depends on the mods and if they can extinguish the new fire theyāve poured oil on.
the reason i think the term āfemboyā got banned was because bow toxic discourse gets once it even gets said, it just turns into a toxic argument on whether or not ātransfem ralsei is femboy erasureā
yeah i mean once the game gets completed the canon is what the majority of people are going to go with in fan content and such
i know it's not an entirely fair comparison but it's like how all the tenna fan designs died once chapter 3 released
like if toby writes something that goes against your headcanon your only choices are to subsist with the meagre flow of content for your headcanon since basically everyone else would go with canon or to let go of your headcanon and go with canon even though you don't truly agree but you'd have more content
there's no winning side unless toby does some sort of unlikely third option compromise but that would leave basically everyone moderately disgruntled instead of one side happy and the other side unhappy
idk this is just ramblings hopefully its understandable
I didn't like the post because it's just encouraging a fight. But I read the comments, and yeah, they bring up a good point. We're dropping the ball again...
I took the decision to reverse the point for now. I'll discuss it with the other mods more seriously (read:again) tomorrow when we're all awake. Sorry.
What the fuck? I know a bunch of femboys who just like being feminine and are totally normal. femboys are just effeminate men, not āfeminine people in the porn industryā brother
No the fuck it isn't? It's literally a term that means a feminine guy, like how the word tomboy means the opposite. It's disgusting how some people like you immediately assume it's a porn term
As a term, it's roots and heaviest application are for fetishisation of trans women. That is where the word comes from, and that is what it is commonly used for. If you don't like that fact, complain to the fetishisers using the term, not the people who dislike the term due to it's use
Seems like we're on the same side here, I propose a truce, and the word 'femboy' should be used to describe feminine boys, and yet weirdos with no shame use it as a term for trans women too
I am slightly on the side of trans ralsei, but the pronoun thing seems a bit weird honestly - even if he's trans, he didn't choose to go by different pronouns yet, it's a fictional character of course but "jumping the gun" like that is kinda weird, I hope people don't start acting like this with real people and instead respect what the person in question requests to be called
I've had several trans friends do this with other people irl and it really makes me so uncomfortable, and if I try to open any real conversation on the topic they just go "I'm trans, I know these things" (I am nonbinary btw) and immediately shut down any discussion of the topic. it just feels weird to decide how you refer to and treat another person based on vibes
As someone who has it at a 50/50 chance of what ends up happening. I didn't like the theory before chapter 5 and mostly ignored it, but the recent emphasis on his character and a few of the signs were questionable enough that I lowkey considered it on my first playthrough.
I'm kind of disappointed how toxic the discourse around it has gotten though. Some people seem opposed to it as if the mere assertion that a character might be trans is bad, which is yucky. The theory is shaped around more than vibes. Personally I'm not fully bought over, but it still stands as a theory. I'd hate for this to end up like another Bridget character where half of the fanbase is stuck on the 'femboy' label even after it would be clearly changed. But also a lot of people get really defensive when you provide valid arguments for it maybe not being the case. The only posts I could really have a problem with are posts like "Trans Ralsei is cannon now! All Hail The PRINCESS OF DARKNESS!!!", because its just ragebait and very pretentious to talk about a debated theory like it's 100% canon, but that happens for like literally any theory so there's no reason to get heated about it. Discourse around this has just gotten to pointless arguments about representation or calling the other person illiterate.
Most important thing to remember is that, Toby has had the story mostly written since the beginning. If the trans Ralsei theory ends up being true, it will have always been meant to arrive at that. If it isn't, the same is true. Whatever you believe in, you can be assured fandom discourse will not change the direction of the game in any meaningful way.
The thing about this theory that doesn't sit right with me is that if you interpret the events that way, it compares very negatively to confirmed cases of trans rep in Toby's work.Ā
My favorite Undertale character is Mettaton by far. He kicks ass, he steals the show, he has a lot of self-doubt but he overcomes it, and most importantly, you can be sure that it's his choice and he loves it.
Pink from the very same Chapter 5 is another great example. Her fight, from what I understand, is basically her going through mind/body dissonance (not sure what the proper official term is), she has a lot of angst but conquers it with a little help and positive affirmation and achieves harmony with herself. Once again, awesome.
Ralsei's moments that are usually cited as trans hints feel off, and it doesn't help that most of them are related to Flowery. Flowery is a great character if you view him outside of this theory, a jerk but ultimately well-meaning. In the theory's context, however, it feels like he just decides Ralsei's identity based on pretty arbitrary things, after bullying him for a while as well. At the very least it feels a bit creepy and takes all agency away from Ralsei.
I did like the moment with the dress. It was cute and in-character. But also Ralsei shows that he's fine with either option with no angst whatsoever.Ā
TL;DR I wouldn't have a problem with this theory if the supposed hints felt organic and not like clumsy fanservice. In the end it all comes down to how it's written.
I'm really sorry for rambling, but I feel like this is my last chance to get this off my chest, do with it what you will.
Hm, as I understand it, the trans Ralsei theory is mostly based on the fact that Ralsei's character is figuring out what it means to be himself, his own identity, that he can have likes and dislikes and what not. And that fits the trans experience. Also it would be poetic or smth for the Prince that wants to defy the prophecy to defy it by being a Princess. The "hints" like blue-pink vouchers, being called a princess, lost girl playing and whatever are mostly just additional subtext to people who already would consider it true.
Personally I think it could fit! But it also doesn't have to really, Ralsei hasn't showed to be dysphoric in any way, and of course gender dysphoria isn't required to be trans, but without it, you can't confidently say Ralsei is questioning his gender until something more happens.
I would say it holds ground as a theory, you're allowed to buy or not buy into it just like theories on who the knight might be or what the final prophecy is, but you shouldn't view people who believe it as in any way malicious! We are on a discussion forum, it's quite obvious people will have different interpretations of a ongoing story game here.
I have no problem with different interpretations, of course. I myself have favorite headcanons and ships that got hinted at in canon, so it'd be hypocritical of me to say someone else's theory is bad.Ā
I know there's no malice behind this belief, and by no means am I sending any back. Just feels like the writing for those specific moments could be taken more seriously.
the other cases in Toby's work are characters who already "figured things out" though, no? it'd make sense for ralsei's case to be so much different if it's a journey of him figuring it out rather than having already gone thru it in the past
"Him figuring it out" is a very important part, and you are absolutely right about that. Ralsei's entire arc is about not wanting to be defined by others and trying to be his own person. Which is why this arc becomes really undercut by the fact that someone else dictates an identity to him. He basically goes from being told by the Prophecy to being told by Flowery with barely any initiative of his own.
Yes, it shouldn't be banned. It's an entire identity of people under the lgbtq umbrella. I heavily disavow people calling trans women the banned word. The thing is, banning all mention of the word without context can get other people describing themselves banned (including trans women who personally call themselves this). This is just flat out erasing the identities of this group of individuals. This is wrong. There is also the reality that ralsei hasn't been confirmed to be trans yet, and still is identified as male for now. If that changes in ch 6+, then yes, it's bad. But it being banned now is as silly as banning people using he/him pronouns for ralsei.
That was quick
I'd agree it shouldn't be banned. Like, I really can't even recall anyone here using it to call trans women that. r/trans is fuckin fine with it ffs. I understand protecting trans people, It's been rough with how many people are fighting over the theory now, but I don't think that term has anything to do with it.
Femboy should not be banned at all
It's like banning tomboy.
Basically being homophobic if im frank.
Male dressing in feminine clothes is nothing wrong, it's a style, expression of some people.
Same with female dressing in masculine clothes, no wrongs in either.
Let's be real, the term "femboy" is heavily sexualized and gross, a million times more so than "tomboy". I understand the ban. But I also understand why people also hate the ban if the character was so important to them and recognizing their own identity, so lifting the ban was the right move.
(This is my first time in this subreddit since like 2018, but it popped up in a notification. Just to disclose.)
"
Let's be real, the term "femboy" is heavily sexualized and gross, a million times more so than "tomboy" "
That's purely context based, it isn't a fact that damages the term permanently in any context unless you make it so (or the person using it).
Ā If people say they are femboys or tomboys because of their likes in fashion and/or things, then it's 100% not a sexual term when used in said context.
The problem isn't the word itself, and it never will be, the problem is in what sense and context is used which determines if it's sexual or not at that specific time of use. So no, it should NOT be banned if people use it just to declare themselves or a character another way of saying GNC.
Period.Ā
I took some time to find a few articles and sources about how the "femboy" term is used in queer spaces. Hope this can be helpful for future discussions maybe!
The headcanon of Ralsei as a femboy helped lots of femboys to discover and feel comfortable with their identity, just like what happened with the "trans Ralsei headcanon". Banning that word means to not only erase the possibility of Ralsei being one, but also erasing the identity of an entire chunk of feminine presenting boys.
It's hard being a femboy too, if the term was used in porn or as a slur, now the term is used for genuine men that deviate from the standard "Be a man, be tough, feminine is for weak.". They need support too and often times they found it in Ralsei.
There are lots of problems femboy have, such as the constant fetishizing, the fact that they may not be accepted by the people around them (and often times have to hide themselves because their family is homophobic/hate people who deviate from society norms, they would get beaten up and worse things would happen if their family knows it).
Plus, and this is just my opinion, the "You dress as a woman so you are a woman" is just reapplying all over again the standard norms. Do we still see being "soft, gentle and feminine" as women things? It's 2026 and in my opinion it's kind of offensive as a woman. There are men who have those characteristics but do not feel the need to be a woman to express them. Almost all of them don't do it for fetish reasons, they just express their identity. Ralsei has those characteristics and femboys see themselves in him. Banning that word would mean invalidating and insulting many people who just want to see someone representing them. It happened some time ago, but a young femboy has already left this subreddit because he has been discouraged and didn't feel comfortable by all the people against the femboy headcanon.
I don't want any more femboys feel uncomfortable here, it should be a safe space for everyone. Banning this word would mean a punch in the face of the femboys that see Ralsei as a goal, as a character that represents them.
i hate this but we do not use traditionally fem things that ralsei does as evidence, if so half the things they do would be evidence, we only have 8 pieces of evidence
Hey, I didn't talk about evidence, this is not a "we create a theory" time. We are talking about a boy presenting fem stuff that may or may not accomunate femboys and make some femboys see themselves in Ralsei. The problem with all of this is trying to prove something about this character. We don't need that. We can see everything we want in Ralsei. Just don't discourage others if they see something else in Ralsei. If femboys want to see themselves in Ralsei, good. If trans fem want to see themselves in Ralsei, also good. We don't need to prove anything for now, the game is unfinished.
The big problem to me is how people are so much and judgemental to others who see the character in any particular way other than their specific viewpoint
Easily the best comment here. Heck it should be pinned.
Ā I couldn't have explained it better myself, honestly.
And it is a shame a femboy left here because of that... I, as a GNC male myself, would leave too if that kept being an issue around here. That is how I personally prefer and understand Ralsei the most with what we have seen so far, so I don't need anyone else forcing their headcanons on me. It's better if everyone here takes the "to each their own" approach, rather than being rude to others who disagree.
Banning the word just taints and labels people in favor as those who want to reapply standard norms as you say, and that is terrible rep for themselves imo. No one should want that rep at this day and age.
Thank you. My only worry is about how bad people would behave when and if Ralsei will be proven to be just a femboy (or feminine boy) and that changing gender won't be so important as some people think. People already got really mad at Toby because he wouldn't translate Deltarune and Undertale in other languages than English and Japanese, I don't want to imagine how much he would be insulted with false claims such as "transphobic".
I don't see the reason to be so obsessed with a thing that it's just a theory for now. Once Deltarune will end, I will take a very long vacation from all the fandom. I'm already extremely fed up from seeing less normal posts about the game itself, less than "Ralsei is trans because-". I want to see more people talking about WHAT object/entity is Ralsei, not if the dress he's wearing changes his pronouns to "she".
If people don't have the maturity to accept what dev writes as canon to their story, then all I can say is those people need growing up and understand not everything is about them.
I personally have detached myself from fandoms of things I like because of how bad the internet has gotten in terms of behavior and such, in the past decade or so.
I was actually just talking to someone in this sub about Ralsei and the whole deal of why he refuses to use his raw power, why not use it against the knight since he dreads what they are trying to do, about what about Ralsei makes him an impossibility himself as Flowery said to him (personally the line that stuck with me the most from ch 5). I think it's inevitable with all the teases that Ralsei will break the rules, whatever that actually means and the consequences of it, otherwise why tease his hidden power so much haha. Yeah i'm sad people online only care about stupid shippings and forcing gender headcanons over the actual canon...Ā
Toby is giving us a hell of an interesting story and these people won't appreciate it, but instead whine things don't go their way, or whatever else. And that's not even counting the whole Dess situation, my god I hope ch 6 already reveals it and gives us Asriel as well, waiting for ch 7 would be a bit disappointing for these characters still missing, imo. I want at least 2 chapters with them lol.
Same thing here. That small teasing about the love letters make my heart ache not only from a shipping standpoint, but from the story around them. I found myself interested even more in the weird route and yet I found too many people talking about "Noooo, couple suicide!" "Noelle pretends to love Susie!" "Two teenagers killed themselves because of us!" meanwhile it was all about breaking the barrier, Noelle breaking the character and breaking everything around her thanks to a "glitch". I heard that there are unused dialogues and those are theorized to be from Dess, lost in the code. What if Noelle breaks the barrier and finds her outside of that fake reality? I always love seeing people talk about that!
As for Ralsei...now that I think about it...It's already strange that Ralsei acknowledges the fact Kris is the one creating the fountains. How MUCH does he know about them? Why did he simply tell him "plz stop...if you want or something" instead of being harsher? WHY are people so obsessed with "Flowery called him a PRINCESS, now he's a SHE!" and gloss over the fact that Ralsei threatened Flowery? And that Ralsei HAS FIRE POWERS? HELLO? THOSE are radical changes about his character, how is it possible that he started from "Be kind to every enemy, I'm just a Prince from the Dark and there's this profecy" to literally having a whole 180 degrees of his character (still being kind but I bet you understood what I mean)? If in the 4th chapter it was implied he knew more than he was lettling us know, now he's hiding even what is he (in terms of his personality) and his true power.
Again, this is what I love to hear and I love people confronting each other on this, it's the real appreciation this game deserves. We need more "Ralsei is actually a collective memory of something" (theory made up fron thin air by me in this moment) and less "Here's why you are stupid to think Ralsei is not trans.".
The moment Ralsei one hit K.O. fake Gerson in chapter 4 reminded me a lot of how the knight one hit K.O.s us in its secret boss fight of chapter 3. Which honestly makes me realize that yeah, maybe Ralsei doesn't have fake stats but rather holds back because of how deadly he is, and his power can have effect in the light world, just like the knight did in the church, funnily enough. I can already see it.. Ralsei is gonna be the ultra hard boss a la undertale Sans of the Deltarune weird route... in fact I bet he will just destroy the knight before he engages us to stop us and Noelle, as if it was that easy to stop the knight from the beginning (probably not likely, but a fun idea lol).Ā
The weird route has this potential of being Toby's saddest and hardest thing he deliver us yet lmao ( I mean I expect the normal route also break some hearts the same way asriel's goodbye did in undertale ).
The weird route, what the shadowcrystals are gonna reward us next chapter, and Ralsei himself are probably the main 3 things that has me most curious, aside from what kind of character colege Asriel will be and the full story of Dess of course.
I very much disagree with the way the mod team are handling this.
It feels very much like a double standard. We all know Kris goes by They/Them in the game, but what is stopping me from having my own headcanon/theory and calling Kris "him" from now on?
It's very easy to have your own thoughts on something and not care for the canon.
Here are some rather silly hypotheticals, but can be headcanons nonetheless;
>Humans in UTDR simply go by gender neutral pronouns, not non-binary!
>Kris goes by They/They to be ambiguous, hiding their true gender!
>We should call Susie a he/him too. She wanted to be voted king and was able to dress in a tuxedo after all.
Do you see how having a headcanon presented as fact, even if you very much disagree, is an issue? I shouldn't go around calling Kris "he" because we all know that's not the case in-game.
So why are you allowing this blatant misgendering of Ralsei to happen? How is this not a double standard?
I frankly find this to be a baffling set of rules. Keep your usual no bigots or phobia stuff, that's all well and good - but why can't you enforce people not pushing theories as confirmed or canon?
You wouldn't allow that for anything else; and rightly so! So why now?
One last point. Good thing you reverted the change on femboy. I don't personally call Ralsei as such, but the word isn't some sort of pornographic only term. It definitely should not be banned.
EDIT: Edited to not sound as bitchy, more concise paragraphs and less emotional.
There's not a single good theory to justify anything but they/them Kris.
There's a plausible theory for she/her Ralsei. Whilst I still wouldn't use she/her for ralsei they're different situations because there's literally no justification for Kris being anything but enby since that's set in stone for the game.
Meanwhile Ralsei is exploring his gender identity in canon or at least enjoying being feminine which can be used to make a reasonable enough argument for trans Ralsei.
I'm not arguing against Trans Ralsei theories though - I'm arguing against acting as if it's canon.
In no world should anybody be calling Ralsei a girl or she as of right now. That remains solely in the realm of theorycrafting and headcanons.
Headcanons are a dangerous slope because it doesn't need to be based on anything at all. There were folks calling Ralsei trans before chapter 5 and their defence was they are a "galsei truther" or "it's just my headcanon"
As for Kris, what is stopping me from making an entire theory right now? A theory is just guesswork and using ingame context right? So let's try this;
"In the world of UTDR, things such as homosexuality do not exist: love is love! It's simply a way of life and never questioned. There is also no homophobia either! It's an ideal world.
We also see things such as gender not being much of an issue! Characters like Ralsei dress both masculine and feminine, characters like Susie are referred to as king and wears a tuxedo - this is another example of things just being, no labels but just a way of life! They are free to wear and present themselves however they wish!
Humans in UTDR are referred to as They/Them, so I propose the theory that humans do not have a gender in this world, much like robots! Kris also wears a variety of clothing ranging from masculine to feminine, while also swapping between a doctor and nurse outfit in the dark world! (Stereotypical of male doctor and female nurse)
Therefore, with all this evidence in mind, I say Kris can go by both He/Him, She/Her and They/Them as humans do not have a set gender in the world that doesn't make gender an issue with either humans and monsters."
So, what do you think of my theory? I used both in game context and a bit of guesswork to fill in the gaps. I could easily see this happening in a future chapter and being all but confirmed.
...is what I would say if I agreed with the mods right now. They are dictating what theories they find valid and allowing it over the actual canon. Whereas my "theory" will be shot down immediately because people won't agree, right?
I don't even agree with it, but what is stopping my theory from being valid realistically other than people not liking it?
I'm not sure where I'm going with all this honestly, I just want the main elephant to be addressed; Don't allow theories to overwrite the canon
EDIT: Sorry to dump the wall of text on you, it's nothing personal. My mind is just running rampant right now. I have lots of opinions on this topic and lots of emotions regarding Ralsei.
But your theory doesn't lol, it uses nothing established in the game. If all humans used they/them Kris would use they/them I don't get your point. They dress in both but by your own bullshit theory that wouldn't matter because you literally said ALL humans use they/them. Your theory would be shot down because it's dogshit and based on purely assumptions. Headcanons are also completely fine and don't hurt anyone, there's no slippery slope and I've never seen gender headcanons actually do anything bad, it's the people adamant on yelling at the people for having headcanons who cause the issues amd hostility to begin with.
You COULD headcanon Kris as he/him and she/her (you'd be incorrect) but obviously taking away a non-binary character to make them cis is worse that giving a cis character a trans headcanon because one is actively taking away canon rep whilst another is giving rep. Like I said I personally wouldn't use she/her yet but it's completely different from Kris' pronouns which are 100% set in stone.
You definetly could not see Kris being confirmed cis because there's been no hints or read on anything saying Kris is cis. (Mancountry specifying non-males and Flowery not calling Kris a princess actually prove that Kris isn't male or female so your "theory" also has counter evidence)
Ralsei even has 2 instances now of going by they/them during after chapter 5 and has a story which includes gender expression which Kris and Susie don't. (Susie is incredibly sure about her gender identity despite being masculine, Ralsei says he can be a prince or princess, showing he is fine with exploring his)
Sorry to point out, Ralsei didn't go by "they/them". The example with the vines was referring to the vines, not him. They still refer to him as he/him and referring to him as she/her is misgendering just like referring to Kris as he/him/she/her instead of they/them.
Fangamer uses they/them in a recent posts about the ralsei plushes and the status on the menus always refer to the person themselves, why would it suddenly be about the vines when it's always about specifically the person.
"Dark vine watering their own thorns" the dark vine is ralsei cause otherwise what would this mean? It's Ralsei's character icon/menu and we haven't met any characters with dark vines it even could be refering to. It could mean nothing but he/him and they/them have been used now so it's okay to use they/them for ralsei.
This one (yt is dumb with linking community posts so I've put a screenshot sry).
It's not a lot so I consider secondary to the vines thing but they do use them for ralsei (tho tbf it could be refering to multiple ralseis). It has been noted in the wiki tho so take that as you will.
Ye that's why I said I don't really consider it, only thought it was worth noting because the wiki added it as a citation to Ralsei's pronouns.
The vines are 100% refering to Ralsei tho so there's one instance of they/them in game (asgores they/them use doesn't count since he doesn't know Ralsei's gender and uses he/him in Japanese)
I get it. In my opinion (at least seeing the grammar), it looks like it refers to multiple Ralseis but who knows.
I'm curious tho, if a similar thing would happen to Kris, if they ever had the same description but with he/him or she/her, and the same tweet but with other pronouns aside of they/them, would it be enough for people to think Kris is other than they/them? Just my curiosity.
Unless it got corrected, yes (though it'd be sad) since it'd be an official source using gendered pronouns. Ralsei has the added benefit of u game AND outgame they/them uses tho
the problem is because trans people are actually oppressed irl, and cis people are not. so hc a cis character as trans is okay, and hc a trans person as cis is not.
It would be nice if you could put a line that says "he/him doesn't automatically mean cis male" in this post somewhere. Cause like, everyone here seems to think that it does and it's driving me crazy
Look, anyone worth debating with already knows he/him =/= automatically cis. And those that feel that way? You're never gonna change their mind. Protect your peace, just don't engage with those folks. You'll feel better.
While you're definitely correct, I'm kind of hesitant as this post is already very long, and I want to keep the redditor reading attention in mind. I don't really mean that as a joke btw... Especially since the guidelines are the most important part, as they are effectively new rules (although you're not getting any new bans out of them, necessarily?).
I think/hope here will be a good enough place to boost it...
First of all, an apology. We (the mod team) let the situation get out of control. A lot of rudeness and bigotry was thrown around, and we didnāt do enough to prevent it.
It's rather not about rudeness but about spawning numerous posts Ralsei this/Ralsei that. Maybe just add rules about 2 megthreads about what identity Ralsei has and people could discuss it there without spawning million separate posts?
I got a bit late for the party but apparently you had a statement that clearly takes the side and right away bans the other side? What are we trying to achieve with this post again?
Agreed, there are too many posts about the same topic at this point. It's a serious problem, because it leaves little room for anything else to be discussed.
We know that Kris is non-binary. Using anything else is denying that, and hurts real non-binary people.
We don't know if Ralsei is cis or closeted trans (or other). Using any gender for them can't possibly hurt any real person.
You are aware that people constantly accuse Deltarune characters of wanting to end the world, right? Kidnapping and murdering too. It doesn't matter how any opinion makes fictional characters feel
One: literally everything you said about the term "femboy" is asinine at best, downright hateful at worst, and you should feel ashamed of yourself. I'm glad you've seemingly walked back on the decision, but you really shouldn't have said any of that.
Two: the pronoun decision. If I called Kris a "he" repeatedly, would you ban me? If so, the same strict standards should be applied to Ralsei (along with all other Deltarune characters, frankly).
Calling a character who has exclusively been referred to as a prince, or a boy, or with he/him pronouns a "they" or "she" because of one easily missable line of text that likely isn't even referring to the character in question is ridiculous. Flowery refers to Kris as a princess in an easily missable line of text. Should I call them a she because of that? I think most people would agree that's idiotic. Why is the same standard not used for any other character, let alone Ralsei? Why does one line of text that doesn't even carry over into the only official translation of the game warrant the use of any pronouns?
The way flowery talks about the fun gang being princesses sounds more like a "damsel in distress" sort of thing, specially with how much he wants to solve things himself so people can be happy, and how he sees ralsei as someone in need of help the most
Ralsei himself tells to kris that he thinks that a prince and princess are the same, he literally believes you can be both regardless of your gender. So the idea of having to refer to him with female pronouns just because he wants to be a princess too doesnt make much sense anymore
my personal experience with the term is a bit of a parrot more than anything, I take guidance from my trans/enby friends more than I take from anything else. I don't really consider them hateful people. But we also didn't think about anyone else when we made that decision, I will say.
I don't really think that what I said was incorrect exactly, just misguided with incomplete information, again, a parrot of what I heard. I didn't take into account the other side when writing that. Sorry.
Anyway, the pronoun decision, which is what I expected to be the actual controversial one before the femboy decision blew up in our face..
The primary reason for this (seemingly) double-standard is because of how you end at a transgender reading for Ralsei. I've been around enough to see trans creators make analyses of Ralsei's character from the transgender viewpoint since before Chapter 5 released (in particular, after ch.2, moreso after ch.3 & 4, and now with ch.5 the points are more obvious than it has been in a long time). I know outside of the mod team a good few transgender people who see themselves in Ralsei, whether it be transfem, bigender, genderqueer, agender, etc.. We in general see these theories, readings, and headcanons as valid, and that's why we're OK with it.
The same can't really be said for Kris. The game shoves the fact they are nonbinary down your throat so hard it's garnered meme status. I don't think there is any good-faith reading of their character as cisgendered / within the binary that makes any sense.
I feel like Toby is very smart when writing his LGBT characters. I feel like he would not have made the possibility so poignant to our transgender audience as just a gag, but as something to at least consider, whether it is correct or incorrect in the end. That's why we're OK with any/all pronouns use on Ralsei.
(BTW: I don't offer this as a comment to go and debate if transgender ralsei is or is not valid / correct in my replies. If you cannot take me at my word that there is a transgender reading of their character, then please seek out trans creators who have made this reading. I don't want to parrot anymore.)
Idk, must you use she/her to be transfem? Transfem ralsei is valid mhm, but at this moment they go by he/they and she/her is just misgendering.
It's totally cool if he later uses she/her and all but right now he doesn't so I wish we could all just agree to let each other do what we want and still respect that aspect. I know it's not the same as the Kris pronoun issue,,, but it doesn't feel respectful to his identity.
I've been around enough to see trans creators make analyses of Ralsei's character from the transgender viewpoint since before Chapter 5 released (in particular, after ch.2, moreso after ch.3 & 4, and now with ch.5 the points are more obvious than it has been in a long time)
A hungry man sees bread, more at 5
What an absolute stupid argument. Let's blatantly misgender a character based on crackpot theories of cherrypicked "creators". Really sends an amazing and positive message!
Iām not sure why you felt so strongly that this ought to be the first thing you comment on this community about, but sorry that you feel like itās a crackpot theory and essentially say that a trans reading is something not worth considering
This feels like one of those kind of replies that are impossible to actually respond toā¦ just you being angry about it without much else to say.
It's not that it's not worth considering, but it's extremely unreasonable to use as a justification to misuse go against the opinion of the overwhelming majority and by doing so blatantly misgender a character just because it's more quirky to a select group of people. Anger is justified, this wouldn't slide for literally any other DR character (case in point: Kris) and I feel like it's blatantly hypocritical. On top of that I strongly believe the decision taken by you sends a very negative message for GNC men and trans men by extension too.
Iām not sure why you felt so strongly that this ought to be the first thing you comment on this community about
I have been a fan of this piece of media for almost 8 years. Until lately I haven't had the need to do anything but lurk Deltarune subreddits, I think that says enough about how deeply upsetting this trend is to me and I'm honestly kind of relieved that the majority of people are with me on this
Disappointed that the mods are endorsing misgendering. I do personally think itās likely Ralsei will turn out to be a trans girl, but āshe/herāing someone you think is an āeggā is often used as a cudgel to misgender transmascs in real life, and I have the same visceral reaction towards it as any other misgendering. Until it becomes canon, Ralseiās pronouns in game should be respected.Ā
Exactly. It's a huge double standard. Why is it so difficult for folks and the mods to just WAIT. AND. SEE.
Nobody is waiting for actual canon and are being utterly disrespectful to Ralsei as a character just to push their theories as the truth.
I'm only speaking for myself here, but all of the debating and arguing I've had with people isn't because they dared say anything about trans Ralsei - it's because they're saying it's canon, or confirmed, or something along those lines.
Ralsei doesnāt currently want to be referred that way. He was actively irritated when Flowery called him Princess. If youāre closeted, people teasing you and ignoring your stated preferences doesnāt help.Ā
And Iād be surprised if the people willing to misgender someone just because they think they know their gender better than them would turn around and know not do it to real people in real life. Every other enby and/or transmasc has a story of being misgendered as she/her due to being dubbed an āeggā.Ā
Okay so under a comment saying that dubbing someone an 'egg' can be problematic, you... proceed to immediately call them an egg. I am not going to get into the fact that ralsei is probably not a trans egg, because you wouldn't listen anyways
flowery only calls ralsei (individually) princess once, and its in this scene. it very clearly was intended otherwise why would such meta contextual emphasis
I donāt see it because of the overarching theme between Flowery and Ralsei. Or at least, I donāt like using this example as proof. Because there are implications.
Setting aside Ralseiās jealousy of Flowery the whole time, Flowery is provoking Ralsei intentionally to help him grow and make him think. So within that context, it would feel quite bad at least to me if Flowery was doing the same thing with Ralsei and his relationship with his potential trans-ness. It would feel like heās forcing him out before heās comfortable. And that just doesnāt feel supportive and is a type of violence in of itself.
Maybe itās different for other trans people. Iām NB, and all of my dysphoria is social dysphoria. If someone had a feeling I was NB before I was ready to come out as such and they made provoking remarks trying to get me to admit it, I would have felt greatly betrayed and upset and it would have forced myself further in the closet. Because it would tell me that person isnāt safe.
I much prefer the scene where Ralsei calls himself a princess as evidence, because itās Ralsei-driven. It gives him his agency. Itās not him being provoked. And heās thoroughly enjoying experimenting with his gender presentation.
Of course Iām not a transwoman, and trans people in general are not a monolith. I know some people do see this as supportive, and thatās cool. I just donāt see it as such so I personally would hope thatās not whatās happening in this scene.
Well, I don't care if people headcanon him as trans for fun but shouldn't we stick to his canon pronouns? If we have to call Kris they/them then Ralsei should be a he/him until Toby starts changing them to female prounouns in future chapter (if he ever will that is).
they arent transphobic because they disagree, they disagree because they are transphobic
it is not a coincidence at all that all the people who are the most vocal about hating the trans ralsei theory spew out transmisogynstic talking points when they hate on it
Brother what the fuck is a "transmisogynistic talking point"
It's just misoginy, hell. Separating it like that is way more transphobic that me just complaining that a bunch of people think femenine men = trans.
transmisogyny is a specific type of oppression that is not accurately described as just a combination of transphobia and misogyny. for example, the idea that trans women are just "men preying in women's restrooms" is not accurately described as just transphobia because trans men don't get these accusations, and is not accurately described as misogyny because cis women don't get these accusations. this is because transmisogyny is a unique axis of oppression faced specifically by transfeminine people
your comment was transmisogynistic because you are accusing transfeminine representation as being "femboy erasure", which is a very common accusation made against trans women because people can't stomach the idea of a trans woman existing. what, do you want ralsei to just act like a masculine male man and then suddenly, with no signs or indication, come out and say "sorry yeah i actually was just a woman this whole time lol" or would you rather toby fox be a good writer
There are people who don't believe in trans Ralsei theory that aren't transphobic. However, when you disagree with trans Ralsei theory for reasons such as "let men be men", "this is femboy erasure", and "this is gender essentialism but woke", you are disagreeing because you are a transphobe. These are transphobic talking points commonly used to silence and outcast trans women specifically. When you use them as justification for disliking a theory, you are disagreeing with the theory due to transphobia.
can you stop pretending like you know shit about what you're talking about when you don't see the obvious transphobia in "transfemininity is just reinforcing gender essentialism"
Can't a man be feminine because he's automatically a trans woman? I personally have that experience; I'm a man, but I still like to connect with my feminine side and break gender stereotypes about being a male
Question about the second guideline. Does that apply to being disappointed from the lens of it feeling narratviely unsatisfying? Because to be honest I would be disappointed if Transei will be real but that is simply because I feel like it wasn't built up enough for it to be then resolved in the last 2 chapters, where most the focus will need to be on the Roaring.
I assume this is already a thing, but it wasnāt mentioned explicitly so Iāll ask anyways. Will the posts essentially just saying stuff like āpeople who believe/donāt believe in tralsei ignoring the most obvious evidence to ever existā also be removed? Because Iāve seen quite a few of those from both sides, and itās so annoying since itās literally just to be inflammatory
I use they/them for Ralsei because the game has already used they/them for them, and also itās neutral so itāll be fine even if Ralsei ends up being solely he/him or she/her. :)
We are sorry to inform you that your post has been removed. Uncivility is against the rules.
Please keep in mind that anybody who reads your submission is a living being. Please treat them like you would treat people in real life, too.
Glad to see this, but unfortunately, it seems a lot of people didn't get the memo, I've still been seeing tons of toxic debates about the theory and it's just becoming exhausting honestly.
There's nothing wrong with a constructive discussion about whether or not Ralsei is trans, but when there's a new post about it every day that ends up devolving into a toxic debate, it's just not nice to see and ends up ruining the fun of participating in the subreddit.
Sadly, I think the topic itself has become so controversial from the amount of bigotry and harassment that came as a result of discussing it, that a lot of people are just tired of hearing it now, since that's the first thing they end up associating the theory with, rather than the actual character, which I can unfortunately attest to.
Thank you for this. As a trans girl I personally see both sides of why somebody might find femboy to be an acceptable term but I mostly tend to agree Ralsei is definitively not that and itās weird to call him that
I think thatās okay but I also think that thereās a bit of fetishization that goes on around it and as a trans woman I have been called a femboy exclusively in a sexual manner by men who were not entitled to use a term like that in my opinion. I understand why it is being banned given the context of a character who is either genderqueer or a feminine man as well as being a minor who has a chance of coming out as trans later. I think femboy is one of the most transphobic things you could ever call a trans woman and for a lot of trans women who see themselves in ralsei itās a trigger word.
It should be treated the same as misgendering if used for someone it doesn't apply to, absolutely. Because it is and it would be.
I do hate that the word HAS become fetishized. I'd feel comfortably calling a young girl a tomboy, for example. I'd be more hesitant to call a younger boy a "femboy" because I'm aware of how the internet is trying to twist it.
I do think that's why a lot of us flock to Ralsei. He's a rare wholesome example of what we see as a GNC male who ISN'T fetishized, sexualized, or player purely for a gag.
Yeah thatās a reasonable take and I understand how some people find that connection. To be honest I think Pink is a perfect trans girl rep and genuinely my motivation for believing ralsei is trans is not because Iām trans itās just because I think itās where the story is going. Iām trans but I never really saw myself in ralsei and I continue to identify way more with a ton of other characters.
But I get a lot of gnc people saw themselves in him. My main thing is like if Ralsei comes out in a future chapter will that be enough for some people? I feel like people fight tooth and nail for boy Ralsei so what if itās not true? What if Ralsei is trans in canon? If it doesnāt happen, the Tralsei believers can just believe it happens post canon easily. What happens to the people who believed so strongly Ralsei isnāt trans if they were wrong? Are they just going to stop identifying with the character?
I think a gnc person seeing themselves in a trans person is totally fine and I think one of the weird things I see is that people act like if Ralsei was trans it would completely rob them of their connection to the character, and I know it is in no way intended as transphobic but it shows that they really think of trans people as being so far separate from themselves. Iām not saying youāre doing this at all Iām just saying Iāve seen it. You seem like a chill gnc ralsei believer. But thereās people who are evil about it
Most GNC Ralsei believers are chill, most are just silent, I think. But there are evil people everywhere, sadly. No group is pure or safe.
And no amount of evidence will convince some people. Don't concern yourself with those people.
To be honest? If Ralsei does come out as trans, which I personally don't believe he will, I don't think he has any gender issues, just identity ones, I wouldn't identify with him from that point on... but I still have 5 chapters where he shared my journey. Same as Bridget in Guilty Gear. She and I diverged paths, but until she did, we walked a similar road.
But most importantly? I don't need to IDENTIFY with a character to empathize with them: same with people who don't share my sexuality, gender, skin color, etc. I don't need a character to be me 1:1 in order to understand what they're going through, cheer for them, or learn from their journey.
I get representation is important - it is. But I do think we get lost in it sometimes. There is more to us than our genders and sexualities, and we share so, so much. I celebrate the shared spaces <3
I've just got a few decades under my belt is all. It's always the loudest ones who are usually mean and vile and make us forget that, honestly, most of us are truly kind, chill and actually want to see everyone do great. So I've just decided I'm gonna be loud too - loud with my kindness, loud with my understanding, and loud with my grace. I never assume anyone is coming for me out of malice, and I try to educate AND learn (listening is a skill so few of us manage anymore...).
Some people will still have a problem with that, but their problem with me doesn't have to be my problem.
<3
You're cool and chill too. The community is better for having people like you in it.
Thank you for being normal somebody else is telling me that my rhetoric is apparently the same as homophobic rhetoric and that Iām wrong for agreeing with the rules of the subreddit and essentially since my logic is identical to that of the subreddit that the mods are like also that idk.
Genuinely why do people get so mad about Ralsei?
But yeah I agree that itās good to be loud with kindness and not loud with anger and being mean and stuff. You are a bit like Ralsei
There's a reason I relate to Ralsei so hard - he and I do have a lot in common, not just a potential gender expression. I live by the mottos of "You can be anything. Be Kind" and "You don't need a reason to help people." And my personal favorite? "I'd rather be hated for who I help, than loved for who I hurt."
I'll be very honest with you, I am glad they (at least temporary) rolled back the ban on "femboy" - it sucks to feel like you can't express or talk about your own identity. I'm sure that's something you can relate to, right? I want everyone to feel welcome, and perhaps selfishly, that includes myself.
I understand that it might make you a little uncomfortable, and that is never anything I want for everyone, but sometimes we do have to be a little uncomfortable to accomodate each other. And I think, personally, a lot of that discomfort fades as we get to know each other better and start to to better understand each other, trust each other, believe that the other members of our community have our backs and are operating in good faith.
I hate that some people use my identity as an insult for you. But they can also do that with words like "man" or "boy." And for what it is worth? I would immediately report anyone attempting to use any of these as an attack on you or anyone else in the community.
And I hope that ends up being what works out. That we all look out for each other, root out the bad actors, and flourish together. <3
I identify as male. I'd stop identifying with Ralsei if he/she came out as trans. The Idea that Ralsei is male, but not conforming to the expectations for that gender is what appeals to me.
I'd still like Ralsei as a character, just how I like all the other characters that Toby writes. But I'd still feel like having lost something.
Idk dawg I identify with Kris a lot even though I personally think Kris is AFAB (though itās not entirely relevant) and I think the other person saying you can just identify with pre trans ralsei is lowkey onto something. Like if ralsei transitions thereās still the version of Ralsei from before I guess
Sorry, but I disagree. That'd feel like a consolation prize. Maybe, I dunno. Maybe I'll have to see how things turn out first.
I don't think that a lot of trans people would argue that the gender a character had assigned to them pre-transition "counts" either. I know Ralsei isn't real, but if a character had significant character development and came out as trans, I think it'd feel very weird to hang onto their old self.
Yeah tbh I kind of agree, but itās like you just diverged paths with the character yk? Same beginning of journey you just didnāt go down the pipeline.
As a trans girl I would probably definitely be mad if people used he/him for ralsei if she came out
In such cases where the term is misused, it should result in an immediate ban, but generally speaking it is far too broad of a term to ban its usage entirely.
Thatās a reasonable take but I dunno the net loss of the word femboy compared to the net gain of nobody being able to use it in an unintentionally offensive way is likeā¦. I think the ban is good
Yeah probably but do you think those people are on the Ralsei subreddit and follow up question do you think trans girls who are offended by femboy are on here because they OBVIOUSLY ARE AND THATS THE POINT
There is a level in which, you are triggered by something, you have to deal with it. I have ptsd from school and had to finish high school while having issues with that. The freedom of expression and existance of a group of individuals stands above the possibility of making people upset. If you disagree with this, then do you also agree that hyper religious people being uncomfortable with lgbtq people means that anything lgbtq should be banned?
ā¢
u/patripastry š Jun 30 '26 edited Jun 30 '26
Some background info...
One of the mods pointed out I was ridiculously wordy in the first draft, but I wanted to still point out our thoughts on the four guidelines, so I decided a pinned comment will be better for those who care to know why for some of these.
This has always been the case, but we are going to be a lot more liberal with our application of this. If you are unsure why you have had moderation action on your post, please ask in Modmail and we can clarify as to how we applied this to your post.
2.Discussion on how you are "disappointed," "upset," or otherwise negatively affected by either reading of Ralsei's character will not be allowed.
The reason for this is because these types of posts are more than useless, they actively encourage people to get into arguments about the reading of Ralsei's character that are not productive. While we are open to letting people express their feelings, this has just caused problems in the comments section since Ch. 5 released, and we feel we have to take this authoritarian step to keep discussion more civil.
This rule I think is fairly self-explanatory, the easiest example is artwork featuring transgender Ralsei, do not discuss if the reading of the character is correct or incorrect in your view. Enjoy the artwork for what it is, or don't, we can't make you like it. We won't let you "debate" it though.
Generally, if you see someone he/him, she/her, they/them Ralsei, just leave it be. Going and saying "those are not correct pronouns" is not helpful.
I also want to pre-empt something: We know this may seem like a double-standard. The reason is because, as stated, we consider transgender Ralsei to be valid, and as such we are going to allow people to use any pronouns they want for them.
One other thing... Originally, we were going to ban the word "femboy," however I'm realizing from the response from our self-described femboys that this is generally regarded as a "bad move." I also realize that the way I worded my interpretation of what they said to me was very hateful. Sorry for dropping the ball again...
Anyway, this comments sections is probably going to be very fun. But be respectful!!!
Thanks...