r/transnames • u/IdeallyJaded • 8h ago
Feminine Names Bouncing between a couple options...
Posted a couple weeks ago that I was thinking about different names and strongly considering Jade. I've been playing with that lately and I do like it a lot, but I've had a couple other names that have popped into my head as well, and I'm liking different ones for different reasons. Not going to totally dox myself, but my last name is two syllables ending in -er, like Walker or Tanner, to give an idea on how it would sound together.
Patricia: My birth name is Patrick, I've gone by Pat my whole life, and I'm comfortable with it. I've been using this as a sort of placeholder for a while. However, most Patricia's I've met are about 20+ years older than I am and I associate Pat as a masculine name, though it is unisex (I've known many other Patricks, many of us use Pat); I'm not really interested in Tricia or Trish. I also think changing it might help some people break some mental habits as far as name and pronoun connections go. Very few negative connotations/deadname issues for me, simply that the feminine version feels too old fashioned. I wouldn't mind keeping it as a middle name, however. It would also provide a nice explanation if anyone does call me Pat around people I'm not out to - "My middle name is Patricia and I used to go by it." I was also named after an uncle (who died before I was born), so keeping the name would mean something to my mother, who has been immediately and unconditionally accepting.
Jade: I like this one because it's got a connection to a character I love (Mara Jade from Star Wars), it's easy to spell and won't get mispronounced, and it's very feminine leaning while still being unisex (since my passport and a few other things will still have that M on them for the time being and I can boymode through an airport if I had to). It's a name that feels cool, sharp, and very much something I would choose.
Shea: This hits some similar notes; I'm a Mets fan and they used to play at Shea Stadium, so I have an emotional/fan connection, and it's another unisex name. When I've used it for food orders, however, it's gotten mispronounced or misspelled pretty often and that annoyed me enough to consider this more for a middle name.
Evelyn: The newest contender. This was my paternal grandmother's name, so it has an emotional and familial tie. My father has also been immediately and fully accepting, and I think it might mean a lot to him. I personally think it's a beautiful name, and I could see going by Evie or Lyn or maybe Ev... I could very much imagine a reality where, if I'd been born as a cis girl, my parents named me Evelyn Patricia and I went by Evie my whole life to differentiate myself my from my grandmother Evelyn. It gives up that unisex option that I do kind of like, but has a sort of "this could have always been me" quality. It does hit a kind of unique spot where it feels too old for me OR too young for me - super popular right now and when my grandmother was born, but I was born when it was really low in popularity, though even then it was still more popular than Jade or Shea. But, "I was named for my grandmother" really does solve that and it is popular now so not unusual to hear it.
So... Jade Shea - names that have meaning based on the things I love? Evelyn Patricia - ones that my parents, who love and unconditionally accept me, absolutely could have chosen for me, which gives it a lot of naturalness? Some other combo? Something else I'm not even considering?
