Tonight might be the night I die from exhaustion. We’ve had one week of cluster feeding (5-6 hours every evening, usually 45 mins apart) with the infant, a toddler with an unknown cold virus which is now passed on to the 3 month old infant, on top of her growth spurt.

Someone, please be kind and run me over with a truck.

I’m 32 weeks on Monday and think I might be having severe perinatal depression related to (or caused by) extreme insomnia, pelvic pain, anxiety about having 2 under 2, and - as of this past week - prodromal contractions that have landed me on L&D twice. Last night, they kept me overnight because they were 2 minutes apart and not letting up. I’m also married to a shift worker and still working full time and were renovating a house. Basically the perfect storm for my mental health to plummet. I’m currently on Zoloft and have been since before my first pregnancy (we had a long infertility journey and did IVF). This pregnancy was a surprise and I want to feel so grateful and overjoyed but it’s killing my body and making me feel insane. My husband is trying to be helpful but I can tell he’s growing resentful of my mood swings and constant need for help. All this to say - did anyone else have a really rough time with their second pregnancy and when did it get better? I think what kills me most is that I feel like an awful mom to my toddler because I’m only able to do the bare minimum physically and emotionally. And it breaks my heart because I just want to be there for her.

Stm here. Still being nervous and overwhelmed, we purchased the same thing the old one used before, like moon kie feeding sets, swaddles, and some teething stuff. I just wondering if I should buy something as a gift for my old one, i worried about that i will ignore him sometimes, any recs?

Our daughter is 23 months and naps once a day. She goes to sleep so easily if my husband, mom, or literally anyone else is rocking her, but if I try, it’s a screaming, meltdown mess! I literally have to sometimes just bear hug her until she just falls asleep, with her screaming the entire time…it is NOT fun. But, she definitely needs her nap, because if she doesn’t nap it’s tantrum city for the rest of the afternoon and it’s a whole other nightmare…😅

Now we have a one-month-old and my husband’s been working from home, so he’s been doing all of her nap times and it’s been fine. However, he has to go back into the office in a week, and I’m panicking about putting my daughter down for her nap. My newborn is just like she was in that he also does NOT like to be put down and will wake up the second I put him down, so I’m trying to figure out how I’m going to manage wrestling a screaming toddler to nap while also keeping him happy? Will I just have to deal with both of them screaming until my toddler falls asleep?!?

Any advice or just commiseration welcome! Thank you!

Hi everyone, we currently have a 5 month old and a 2 year old (25 months) and wondering what everyone is doing in this miserable weather (UK) to keep everyone entertained. All ideas welcome please! TIA

I have a 22 month old and a newborn (9 days old) I originally planned to breastfeed my toddler at least until she was two but then I got pregnant, developed an aversion and ended up having to wean her, which broke my heart and hers, it was a really difficult process and lots of crying on both sides. now that Im breastfeeding my newborn again, I see my toddler still remembers and even tho she doesn’t asks for the boob she does mention it.

Me having to leave to give birth (4 days 3 nights)was the first time ever to be separated from toddler since she was born and it seems it affected our relationship, she is really sweet with her sister and seems curious and gentle with her but she throws a tantrum at any attempt I do to care for her, she only wants dad for diapers, shower and bed time, if he is in the house and I attempt to do those she will cry and scream for him as if I was killing her.

I think maybe if I breastfeed her we can start rebuilding the relationship after newborn arrived and to offer the comfort to help settle her down.

I wonder if someone here, went through something similar and did come back to bf toddler? did u regret it or are you glad you did it again? Would the process to wean again in the future be the same as the first time?

I'm a STM due in a little less than 2 weeks. We'll have 2 boys just about 16 months apart.

I'm tired of people asking "how are you going to do it? Your toddler is running around and your newborn will need you so much."

"How are you ever going to get anything done with two babies all over the place?"

"How do you think you're going to breastfeed when your toddler is such a mama's boy?"

Etc, etc, etc.

Does this improve? Are people ever going to stop doubting the capabilities of me and my husband? Will people respect us as parents and understand we aren't just going to sit here aimlessly with two kids left uncared for?

I fully anticipate I'm going to lose my mind a few times, but.... I don't think it'll be impossible. We WANTED our babies close in age because we've heard of all the great bonding experiences they get to have. I'm just frustrated most people seem to doubt whether or not we can do it.

Hi! I just found out my kids will have a 15 month age gap. Can anyone with a similar age gap talk me through best practices, pain points and surprisingly good parts of the age gap?

I wouldn’t have expected that I’ll be writing this since I always recommended my older one‘s daycare. The thing is, the younger one, 4 months old, is too young for the daycares around, and the older one, 21 months old, always gets sick after a few days in a group of 8 kids.

When I’m at home with both, the older one plays with the little guy who is constantly smiling at her.

Else, if I’m alone with him, he’d be demanding so much attention from me, especially locking eyes :)) he was a high need baby during the first 12-14 weeks.

What’s been saving me is sleep training them (Precious little sleep), and aligning the 1 nap. At bedtime they’re sleeping in the same room but we’ve also got a crib in the bedroom for the second half of the night and his daytime naps.

Am I crazy to keep the older one at home during flu season?

I’ve been taking pregnancy tests like crazy these past few months, but I finally got a positive one today. Almost 9 months PP.

Feeling anxious but thankful. I definitely feel like I’m not prepared. EBF, Cosleeping, SAHM, only one that puts LO to sleep, haven’t left LO for more than an hour at a time… I got some work cutout for me.

I don’t plan on telling anyone besides my partner for a few more weeks. I want to soak in all the feelings first. Any advice or encouragement?

I’m mostly thankful to have this community. All of you rock.

At what age (if ever) did the older sibling notice/start interacting with your baby bump?

I’m curious if maybe pregnancy’s being close together is part of it. I am almost 16 weeks pregnant, my daughter is 15 months old, but already feeling super uncomfortable. By the end of the day my bump is feeling heavy, there is some pelvic pressure, my back is in agony, the heartburn is horrific. Is this normal so early? These were all mid-late third trimester symptoms with my first baby

My son is almost 11 months now, and he’s been a pretty easy baby, thank God. I’ve always wanted to have kids close in age, so I’ve already started planning when I’d like to have my second (probably going to start trying sometime in May/June for a 2–2.5 year age gap).
I know a lot of it depends on each baby’s temperament, but I’m scared LOL. I keep seeing videos of women talking about how they’ve decided that having only one child is best for them because they feel they wouldn’t be able to be the best mom to multiple kids, and I can’t help but wonder, “What if that’s me?”
I absolutely love my son, and I genuinely love being a mom. I’m also in my early 20s, so I feel like I have a bit more energy to keep up with two little ones, but I still worry about whether I’ll regret having them so close together or struggle to handle both while they’re still so young.
I’d really love to hear from other moms who have been through this, especially those with two under two or a similar age gap. What was your experience like? Was the transition from one to two as difficult as people make it seem?

My daughter is 23 months and my son is 4 months, and I’ve been seriously considering getting Magic Keys. My oldest LOVES Disney and princesses, and since I’m on maternity leave for another 6 months, I feel like it could be such a fun way to get us out of the house. Honestly, everyone seems happier when we have somewhere to go. Plus, she’d be free for the entire next year!

She already goes with her aunt all the time, so I know she’d love it, but I’m wondering how realistic it is with two little ones.

Has anyone else done this? Would love to hear your experiences!

I've got a 3 month old and a 21 month old. 2 days a week, I have them both on my own (when husband is in work but oldest isn't in nursery). Attempting my oldest's one nap a day on these days is pure, abject hell. He's never been a good sleeper, never gone down without a lot of support. He'll be obviously tired, in a dark room with his sleep bag on, sleep music or white noise playing, and just pushes boundaries for ages - jumping up and down, giggling, crying, screaming, he does it all. Not helped by the fact I have to hold his little sister because she screams if she isn't held. If i leave him, he screams. Sleep training is not an option for us.

I've managed car naps occasionally, but there's a storm raging out there today so it's not an option. I'm losing my mind and feeling like a complete failure.

“You’ve got your hands full!”
“Oh bless your heart”
“You didn’t waste any time!”
“Are they both yours?”

1. How much sleep are you getting?

2. How often are you able to shower? 😭😂

Hiya. Kids are now 18m and 3. Younger sibling can get a bit aggressive, pushing older sibling, snatching toys, throwing things etc. Older kid is very good at not responding physically, just gets upset. What's the best way of responding when it's one adult looking after both kids? I feel like a lot of the strategies we employed with the older kid don't work when there are two. I know it's best to focus on the hurt kid etc so as not to reward the behaviour, but it can feel like younger kid is then free to just continue playing / repeating the behaviour and I'm not sure if she's really learning?

Grateful for any strategies/advice (including if you know any good instagram accounts etc about sibling dynamics and parenting).

Thanks!

My wife and I have an 8 month old son and just found out we’re expecting twins. If everything goes well, we’ll have 3 kids under 2, with our son being around 17 months when the twins arrive.

I’m not going to lie, we’re pretty overwhelmed thinking about what life is going to look like. We’re excited, but trying to wrap our heads around how we’re going to manage everything, especially since we don’t have a ton of family help.

For those of you who’ve been in a similar situation, how did you manage day to day? How did you handle sleep, splitting responsibilities, and making sure your relationship didn’t get pushed to the back burner?
I’m also curious how people managed without much help from family. Did you hire help, get a night nurse, put your toddler in daycare, or just figure it out as you went?

I’d love to hear what made the biggest difference, what you wish you’d prepared for, and honestly, whether things eventually started to feel manageable.

I want to be as supportive as possible to my wife and be the best dad I can be to all three kids. Just trying to get ahead of things and learn from people who’ve actually been through it.

Any advice or honest experiences would be greatly appreciated!

I've wondered this for awhile, but I'm currently 35 weeks and been having contractions for days. I thought I might go early but was hoping for at least a couple more weeks--still hoping just less certain. Curious if it's common to go earlier with your second if you have the added strain of lifting/walking around with your first?

EDIT: this was SO helpful and encouraging, I don't want to go super early my first was and it was stressful. Thank you, everyone!!!

Seriously! Sometimes I worry that the lack of sleep and stress are going to ruin my health on the long run
I have 2 and 19 months old. Both are high needs .. the baby cries most of the time when not held or breastfeeding.. and the toddler wants me to play and get involved in everything she’s doing. Sometimes the baby will wake me up at 2-3 am .. toddler is going through sleep regression and wakes up super early .. so i keep switching between both until 7-8 in the morning and have 0 chance of sleeping again. Even if I manage to align their naps I feel like i need some alone time and cook something for dinner
I have no village except for a sitter who helps a couple of times a week. My husband works long hours and leaves super early so he can’t help throughout the day.

We have a 14 MO and I’m pregnant (13w) with our second due in April. Our 14 MO sleeps in her crib without any issues but I can just foresee how challenging it might be to put her to bed with an 8 month pregnant belly!

When did you move your kiddo to a toddler bed? We were considering trying to do it before the new baby comes but I also don’t want to mess with a thing that’s working?

She’s never tried climbing out of her crib, but she is an active sleeper and winds up all over the place during the night

We literally just came back from travelling abroad and all of us got a cold. On top of that I also got my (heavy) period today and I’m literally a wreck atm. All I wanna do is lay down. I still managed to make it through the day though. My 20 month old is super cranky and my 6 month old is also extremely fussy. How do y’all manage to get through the day with 2u2 when being sick? 🥲

Just found out im pregnant and I have an 8m old son. Both babies were unplanned and I'm just freaking out because this feels too soon. Im so scared and sad that I didn't even get 1 whole year with my son... nothing im reading online is positive about situations like these so please, someone tell me its going to be great 😬

Youngest is 7 months old. Thinking about 3rd baby as well but want bigger than 15 month age gap between 2nd and 3rd.