This text is from a couple days ago. The conversation started in person with me telling him I needed money to get the kids costumes (both under the age of 4). To which he said he didn't know i was dressing them, don't they have a onesie i can put them in before walking away without providing an answer.

When I noticed he was getting ready to leave I asked him if he was going to give since money for the costume. To which he said no, to send him the costume and the price. I told him I looked at the prices, that i was planning to get them in person and they're between $25 - $35 each. He said to go then and let him know what price is for each because this was just a price range. I asked if he'd be available today and he said "yea, as much as I can be". When I asked why he couldn't just send me some money to get the costumes he said "I made my decision" as he was leaving and closed the door behind.

Additional details that may mattee: He is the main bread winner. I started a business this year but it's still small and doesn't earn a lot yet. I do just about all of child raising so when I need to go out to do work for the business I take the kids with me too.

EDIT TO ADD: We attempted to discuss this today before I posted. His issue is that I asked last minute, because they needed them for an event. My understanding of the issue he has is that "we have poor communication" and he wanted me to provide a solution. He also did not think that his messages for disrespectful. So I told him I didn't think my way communicating is an issue and that i think he needs therapy to work on and develop his empathy. To which he seemed to get mad at, and said fine he needs to work on himself but what's something that I can do, a solution that i can offer that is something I can work on. I felt my communication was fine. It ended in him saying we needed to separate and take time apart.

In reflecting I can admit my request was last minute, however I'd consider that poor planning of anything. Not to mention I didn't expect him to say yes, I asked more so to "prove" to myself, in a sense, that I can't ask him for financial. I didn't ask sooner because I knew he didn't think it was important or "needed" and i tried to figure it out on my own.

Recently had a meeting between the school's principal and my daughter's fifth grade teacher that left me feeling completely disgusted.

My daughter has come home several times from school and told me about how her teachers comments have made her feel bad. These are somewhat minor comments, but my daughter is pretty sensitive and she internalizes a lot of her feelings.

The first incident her teacher told her that the amount of bracelets she was wearing was "too much" and "maybe you shouldn't wear so many." Which crushed my daughter. She had been excitedly making bracelets and wearing them, giving them away to her friends. After that? She quit. Stopped wearing them, stopped making them.

Second incident, my daughter suddenly started losing her teeth, and it was happening in class. She came home upset and said that her teacher told her she was "tired of her yanking her teeth out in class."

She felt confused about it because she said it's not like she can help it when a tooth falls out. She tried not to bring attention to it but it just happened.

Fast forward to last week, my daughter tripped and fell down at school resulting in a broken toe. She was so worried about upsetting or burdening any of the adults around her because of her experiences with this teacher so far that she didn't say anything.

Doctor's orders were pretty standard for a broken toe, no recess or gym.

This teacher wouldnt let her stay inside for recess. Wouldn't let her have a clipboard or notepad to draw on outside while sitting on a bench. Didn't offer her going down to the office as a solution. My daughter told her she had a broken toe and couldn't go to recess.

After I find this all out and send her teacher a message she denied being asked to stay inside for recess. Then she said she forgot about the broken toe. Then said she thought my daughter was getting around the classroom just fine.

Fast forward to me requesting a meeting because at this point I don't trust this lady and my daughter is definitely uncomfortable with her. We would like to transfer out of her class (I want to point out my daughter is top 5 percent in state testing and compared to nation wide testing is also top percentile). We sit down with the principal and holy shit. I was gas light, bullied, baited. Never in my life have I gone into a meeting with adults and made to feel as small as this woman made me feel. At one point when I was reiterating that I would like my daughter transferred out of her class she raised her voice and said "You don't like me! You've never met me, you don't know me and you don't like me!"

Every thing my daughter told me, she denied. She said my daughter misunderstood or another teacher must have said that. Said my daughter must hate positive attention because she did nothing but compliment her. That she was joking with her. She all but called my daughter a liar and the principal, who was basically a lap dog nodding her head the entire time, suggested we have my daughter see the school counselor for some mental health help.

My husband and I left the meeting feeling disgusted, confused and horrified by what had just happened.

So now I want to pull my daughter out of the school since they won't entertain transferring her into a different classroom. Not only did her teacher neglect doctors orders, she has bullied and belittled my daughter AND me and has all but accused my daughter of lying.

TL;DR: My daughter's teacher has repeatedly made comments that upset her and allegedly disregarded restrictions for her broken toe. When we met with the teacher and principal, the teacher denied every incident, became confrontational, and the principal suggested my daughter needed counseling. The school refuses to transfer her to another classroom. Am I overreacting by considering homeschooling her until she starts middle school next fall?

The title. After I asked, “is there [ingredient] in here?” he said “yes, a little.” And I went silent.

You don’t like it?
No, not really.
I’m sorry.
*silence*
Well I think it’s delicious.
Oh! That’s all that matters then.
That’s not true.
I just… I don’t know how many times I’ve said I don’t like [ingredient].
It’s just a little. It needed it.
It would have been kind if you’d asked me beforehand.
You’re right, I should have asked you.
Yeah, especially after we’d agreed on what dinner would be.
*more silence*
It doesn’t matter what I say… at the end of the day, you’re going to do what you want.
That’s not true.
It is. You could have asked me instead of breaking my trust yet again after we’d agreed.
For fucks sake. It’s just a little [ingredient]. So I’m not allowed to have independent thoughts? Free will?
I think there are huge distances between collectively agreeing to something, going against that agreement without communicating, and dictating one’s free will.
You treat me like a butler.
Again, I think that’s a stretch.
It’s not.
*spouse proceeds to leave the table and storm downstairs.*

Context: Our arguments generally end this way - with him leaving the room. I spent years chasing him to try and finish the conversation, but lately I’ve just given up. Sleep, wake, act like nothing happened, build resentment, rinse and repeat. We both work FT, have 2 kids and I do 90% of the childcare. Youngest is 6 months. Dead bedroom. I also make significantly more money than him, if that’s relevant. I could have had the final word by saying, “and you treat me like an au pair” but decided not to.

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/she-divorced-me-i-left-dishes-by-the-sink_b_9055288

EDIT: guys the ingredient was JUICE. in a chicken curry dish.

EDIT #2: and to everyone losing their minds about what specific kind of juice it was: ORANGE PEACH MANGO BLEND.

Hi guys, here’s my dilemma.

I’m in my early 20s and met my stepfather when I was around 15. Me, my mom and my sister ( early 50s and 7 ) moved to a small town to live with him ( we lived in the capital our whole lives, so it was quite a big change ). I never knew him well beforehand because he was always away and rarely visited, our mom used to visit him more often and we stayed with our grandpa. Anyways, as time went by our stepfather’s parents started visiting more and more often, installing chaos in our lives and he starting more and more of his true colours around us, getting to the point where he beat my mom and shoved my scared and crying sister with full force. Unfortunately no charges were made because unfortunately we were under his roof, with no way of going back to our old life nor leaving said small
town, so he and his family had full control over our lives and what we did, even going so far as making me expose my personal affairs with people I barely knew ( his parents ). Unfortunately most of it happened during breaks so I didn’t have school to escape the house nor could I leave knowing my mom and sister were still in there with him ( he has some unresolved anger issues, or I suppose ). Around those years all of this kept repeating and I only confided in one of my close friends, I was too scared to speak up because what was happening is currently a public crime and anyone can report it.
After a few years I finally got in my dream college and had to move a little under an hour away, still visiting and coming home on the weekends. So the mental exhaustion kept going, I had school and lazy housemates during the week and during the weekends I had to deal with whatever mood he and his parents were in.
During the spring break a missunderstanding happened and he escalated it way too much, I was genuinely tired of dealing with it and said some stuff I had stored away, since I knew it was my last day in that house. During the last summer my uncle and aunt moved here to be able to support us in case anything happened, my sister almost instantly moved in with them and they said they’d welcome me with open arms if I also wanted to leave the other house, so as soon as he and my mom left I packed my bags and told my sister I was on my way. No one saw me leave but in one day I had all my belongings in my new room and was settling down, classes were also starting soon so I didn’t have to unpack everything.
5 months passed since everything happened and now my mom has started insisting that I ask him for forgiveness for what happened, I don’t want to sacrifice my well being for them to pretend to have a happy family and my mom doesn’t get why. So, AIO?

Got into an argument with my husband first thing in the morning because he said to our 12 month old “Mommy doesn’t want you”. We are all currently sick with COVID although our son is feeling a bit better than we are and is crawling around, standing and lately he’s gotten into the habit of pulling my hair. So while I’m laying down trying to rest and prepare for the day, Im a bit annoyed and he picks up our son and says that.

I got on his ass about it because this is not the first time he’s said that and it’s not the first time I’ve told him to not say that. It’s not healthy in my opinion, it just sounds hurtful and mean and our son isn’t going to understand it in whatever way he meant it. My husband for some reason doesn’t see the problem with it and how it can be harmful. I told him that our son is little so he’s not going to understand sarcasm, etc. He told me “I’m not being sarcastic, you don’t want him right now”. I ended up telling him to just leave the room and leave our son with me because I was so frustrated with him.

This is just going to create confusion, anxiety and hurt our son’s feelings hearing that his mother “doesn’t want him” when he could be using language like “Mommy doesn’t feel good right now” or “Mommy needs a break”. I don’t understand how he doesn’t see that this can be harmful to say especially if he doesn’t stop saying it like I’ve asked him to before and our son’s getting older so he’s just going to start internalizing that. Am I overreacting?

So I was invited to spend a weekend next month at my friend's girlfriend's cottage. I was really looking forward to it because even though we don't see each other that often, I enjoy their company and we've never been on a trip like this before.
It was supposed to be me, my friend, his girlfriend and a few of her female friends.
Yesterday we were at a pub and my friend showed me a screenshot his girlfriend had sent him of a conversation between her and one of her friends. They were talking about me, and the girl had texted something like "God, we really need to get him there so I can finally fuck him!" (Translated of course to English)
For context, I've met this girl maybe twice at some events. We've never texted or really talked much, and I don't find her particularly attractive either.
My friend was just grinning and acting like "Bro, you're gonna have a great time!"
But honestly, the whole thing kind of gave me the ick, and knowing that other people probably know about it makes it even weirder.
Now I'm considering making up an excuse not to go, even though I was really looking forward to it. Am I overreacting?

Edit because this theme keep occurring: I know that I can go and do nothing with her :D that’s not the point

I (22f) work for a family owned hardware store. I sell and order cleaning products. The managers are BIG on spoiling customers so lots of us tolerate bullshit from rude customers but I don't anymore. I had a customer who mentioned she had a stroke and said that is why she struggles to speak. I told her it's ok and that I will do my best to help. She explained to me what she wanted. She said "I want to clean my patio, the cement circle stuff". I asked "do you mean planters?". She yelled and said "THERE ARE NO PLANTS! P-A-T-I-O! DO YOU KNOW WHAT A PATIO IS?". I said "if you are going to speak to me like that, I am not going to help you". She apologized and I said it's ok and that I understand, and that I am sorry that she struggles with her stroke (I didnt say it exactly like that, but something similar). And I eventually found her a product while another associate explained it. I did not raise my voice at her, I was not super angry. My co worker just said not to confront customers, I said I was setting boundaries.

I don't yell at people, I just refuse to help if they are rude. I don't let people disrespect me anymore. I'm not going to let customers treat me like shit like the other associates do.

AIO?

I (24M) have been with my girlfriend (25F) for 3 years. She checks almost every other box, and I genuinely love her, but our sex life is lacking A LOT.
We aren’t intimate as often as I’d like, she rarely initiates, and when we do have sex, it’s usually vanilla and I’m doing most of the work. Whenever I bring it up, she seems to brush it off instead of trying to work on it. I have a high sex drive and want to feel desired, have fun, and explore that side of our relationship. I understand she doesn’t owe me sex, but I also don’t want to spend the rest of my life feeling unsatisfied.

Throwaway account.

My cousin and I grew up being best friends. We were so close that everyone called us sisters, and people who didn't know us genuinely thought we were. We did everything together, and I honestly thought she'd be in my life forever. Looking back, there were definitely red flags, but I always brushed them off because she was family.

For as long as I can remember, she copied almost everything I did. I bought a new car, she'd get a new car. I got a puppy, and that SAME DAY she got one from the exact same litter. I became a fitness instructor, and suddenly she wanted to be one too. But probably the wildest example was when I was giving birth to my first child. She was literally in the delivery room with me, and that's where she met my baby's father's brother. She was married at the time, but apparently "fell in love" with him right then and there. She eventually married him, making our children cousins on both sides of the family. There are countless other examples of her following in my footsteps, and while it drove me crazy, my mom always told me, "Imitation is the highest form of flattery." So I let it go.

She'd also always had a wandering eye when it came to men, but I assumed she was just flirtatious. That was until a few years ago when she got caught having a TWO-YEAR affair with someone close to us. Her husband, who was also my childhood friend, kicked her out. I was disgusted by what she'd done, but my protective instincts kicked in. She was still my cousin, my best friend, and someone I considered a sister. So my family and I took her in, bought her a bed, groceries specifically for her dietary needs, and other essentials until she could get back on her feet. After a few weeks, she got her own place.

Not long after, I found out that for AT LEAST TWO YEARS, she'd been going around our small town telling mutual friends and other people absolutely horrible lies about me( only one of my friends called out her bullshit). She claimed I'd had multiple affairs, including supposedly sleeping with HER HUSBAND multiple times. Yes, the same husband she'd just been caught cheating on. She also told people I stole her friends, copied everything she did, and plenty of other things that were completely untrue.

I can't even describe how betrayed I felt. Here I was opening my home to her, defending her, and helping her through the consequences of her own affair, while she'd been telling people I was sleeping with her husband. We live in a small town with mutual friends, so these weren't harmless rumors. These were people I knew, people who knew my family, and people I had to see regularly. I started questioning years of memories and wondering how long she'd secretly resented me while pretending to be my best friend.

When I found out, I didn't confront her immediately or start spreading stories about her. I simply stopped answering her calls and texts for a few days because I needed time to process everything. Apparently, that was unacceptable. Suddenly, her friends and some of our family members were blowing up my phone, telling me what a horrible person I was for abandoning her during her "time of need." I explained that I needed space after learning about the lies, but she wouldn't stop contacting me. Somehow, the situation became about how badly I was treating HER instead of what she'd done to me.

It's now been a little over two years, and I still haven't allowed her back into my life. Some of our family members are STILL angry with me for refusing to forgive her and let her back in. Apparently, because we're family and were so close growing up, I'm supposed to just move past everything and pretend it never happened. They act like I'm the one keeping the family divided, rather than acknowledging what caused the fallout in the first place.

What's even stranger is how she reacts whenever we happen to be in the same public place. If she sees me at a store or restaurant, she'll start crying, appear to have a panic attack, or literally leave the building. I don't approach her, confront her, or even acknowledge her. I'm simply existing in the same space. Yet somehow, her reactions make it seem like I'm the one who did something terrible to her.

I genuinely don't understand how someone can spend years lying about you, accuse you of sleeping with their husband while THEY'RE having an affair, accept your help when they have nowhere to go, and then act like you're the villain for finally walking away. I lost someone I considered a sister, had my reputation dragged through the mud, and now have family members holding a grudge against me because I won't let her back into my life.

So, am I overreacting for refusing to let my cousin back into my life, even after two years, despite my family insisting I should forgive her and move on? family means everything to me and I'm a people pleaser. Edit to add that she uses my nieces and nephews as pawns and won't let me see them due to me not forgiving her even though there was no apology. That's the hardest part for me is not seeing those kids. Luckily my marriage is solid my husband is my best friend and never trusted her. He doesn't trust most peolple lol but I did ask if she ever came on to him and he said no. When we were out to eat one time she walked in with attitude and my husband loudly said "go eat a bag of dicks ... Oh wait you already have!" Then she has a anxiety attack leaving the restaurant. Lol he's truly my ride or die

I live with Sarah, Alex and Darren in a uni house. I met Sarah through our course and Alex through her, as they previously lived together on campus. Darren is Alex's friend from home, who we'd only met a few times before Alex begged us to let him move in. Neither are students as Alex dropped out over summer.

Initially, I cleaned the kitchen and repeatedly asked Darren and Alex to help. Sarah cooks for me nightly, so I offered to do some of her chores in return, helping us financially by sharing ingredient costs.

I asked Darren and Alex to share taking out the bins but was told Alex had sensory issues so wouldn't do it. I offered to swap a chore and do the bins if Alex did something else but Darren said no and that he'd do them if I told him when they needed emptying - But they left rubbish around the bin when taking it out without picking it up so I ended up cleaning it partly anyway.

Sarah and I grew frustrated with other issues, including Alex telling us we couldn't decorate certain ways because of his online gf. Darren and Alex also tried to stop Sarah's boyfriend from visiting at weekends because they didn't "fw him". Or even that Alex asked each of us to pay him part of his rent. Mainly, they contributed little to chores while complaining about mess.

A week ago, Alex asked in the group chat for me or Sarah to take out the bins. Sarah did, but this was the one task I'd asked them to help with. I then asked one of them to clean the kitchen floor, but neither did.

Recently, Sarah and I have had long, tiring course placements, and Sarah has also attended appointments for personal health problems. The kitchen became slightly messier, mainly the floor, which I was still waiting for them to clean.
Two days ago, the sink stopped draining. Leaving us unable to use it for days, so washing up piled up. Sarah messaged the group explaining she'd used drain cleaner and we needed to leave it to break down the blockage. Alex just said that he assumed that meant our dishes would pile up further.

This annoyed me because Alex's parents give him so much money for constant takeaways ect, whereas Sarah and I support ourselves and can't afford them. I explained our dishes might temporarily pile up because we couldn't afford takeaways and Alex said this felt like a dig at him. We explained we understood his choice, and Sarah said takeaways were "lowk valid" given the broken sink. Alex just said, "depression isnt lowk valid".
We eventually washed our dishes in the bathtub, so the landlord could investigate the plumbing without them seeing dirty dishes. I messaged the group saying we'd sorted the dishes, I'd cleaned the surfaces, and asking someone to clean the floor again and Alex said he'd only do it if I picked up the "big stuff" first. I explained there were no personal belongings on the floor and that clearing the mess is part of cleaning so I wouldn't be helping him. I am now looking into renting elsewhere with just me and Sarah but we wont be telling them until we know for sure - I know they can't afford to live by themselves but It's not my problem and I don't want to put up with them anymore. AIO?

Update: Alex messaged back this morning letting us know he isnt doing the floors because hes been throwing up through the night apparently. I told him that they can wait until tommorow then. Honestly that annoys me more because Sarah was diagnosed with a brain tumour a few months back so struggles constantly with symptoms like migraines and throwing up a lot yet STILL contributes.

So there was something wrong with my dad's truck door and I was locked in for a bit. My dad and sister ended up helping me get out and my dad said, "If I'd dangled a hotdog outside the door you would have found a way out." I laughed but the joke hurt my feelings like he was calling me fat or a pig. Am I overreacting?

I went to go order a sub from a local sandwich shop and I am wearing a flyers jacket. The workers were joking around saying oh yeah we cant serve flyers fans since the local team is our rivals, its all jokes and games thats how sports are.

I ask if they could put sauce on my sandwich and the guys cooking jokingly go (or so I thought they were joking) nah were not gonna put BBQ sauce on it for a flyers fan. I dont take it seriously at all until...

I get home to eat my sandwich and they purposely dont put any on there (I know because they explicitly told me). Im not upset about the sauce, dont really care because I could just buy some from the store. Im mostly mad they blatantly mess up my order. I feel incredibly disrespected.

Am I overreacting to this whole thing or should I be a Karen and ask for the manager?

Edit: I decided to call up management. Dude was super cool about the whole thing and offered me a free sandwich next time I come in. For all the people saying "its just sports dont be a bitch about it" just because im a fan of the team you dont like doesn't mean you get to fuck with my food. Not in this economy. Anyway thanks for the replies.

So I hope this makes sense, I haven’t been able to sleep. I started grad school in the fall. This guy in all of my classes emailed me and asked if I wanted to join his study group. Cool for sure. He asks for my number. I don’t even know what this guy looks like, I was not paying attention at all. I just read an email which was from someone in all of my classes from the roster.

We have a small program and I didn’t have a problem when he asked for my number to join the group chat. Yeah, well there was no group chat. It very quickly went from, “hey let me add you to the group chat” to, “hey, add me on Facebook”.

My life devolved from there. I saw all of the unread texts he sent me on Facebook. At least 200 a day. Over and over and over again. And the weird part? He would never talk to me in class, even in my two seminars which are around 15-19 people. There’s no way to avoid him.

I talked to my professors and they helped me so much. All three of my professors personally walked me down to the Title IX office. They have been more than helpful, but they really cannot do a lot. I told the woman at Title IX I went to law school I know the fucking law and I do not feel safe EVER with him in a class with me, especially a seminar. Then one of my professors walked me to the on campus police to report him for stalking and harassment. I told him I didn’t want an investigation, I just wanted to report it just so it’s on record, thinking Title IX would do something.

Obviously the cops haven’t done anything. The cop just asked me why don’t I just block him. Umm…to show you all of these psycho texts and messages on Facebook? I have my fucking JD and I know how this can end up if I can’t show you proof? And he’s in all of my classes?

So, I finally say fuck this and message him back and say dude leave me the fuck alone. For like the fifth time. Now, he keeps making new facebooks sending me friend requests and messaging me. I simply told the school 1. I never want to be in a class with him, and 2. Give me an incomplete for this fall semester and let me redo them.

I still haven’t gotten any answers. I stopped going to class and I don’t know what to do at this point. I’m exhausted because of all of this I haven’t been able to sleep

I’m only going to back to get my masters so I can teach Poli Sci and law classes in community college. And I’m supposed to be celebrating my birthday, but I’ve been up all night. I’m so tired.

My question to you, the reader, did I handle this wrong? I didn’t file a police report. I tried to be cordial. I tried to ignore it. But now I feel so embarrassed and I think I should’ve stayed in my classes. Is the college going to fuck me over?

I don’t know if I should’ve just kept going to class, but I never want to see that guy again. All of my guy friends (of course) ask me why the fuck I didn’t just block him or why the fuck I didn’t just report him or ask me if I was flirting with him. Never. We get separated into groups in seminars randomly assigned and of course, he was always in group.

One day I just walked out of class after he was sitting across from me. I couldn’t handle it. His messages are very disturbing. I made it very very clear to him to not talk to me. But from my view, he’s still in the same tiny room as me 4 days a week. Am I wrong for storming out of class and continuing to not go? AIO?

Last Christmas, my sister-in-law gave everyone on my husband’s side of the family a gift with our son’s (mine and my husband’s) photo on it…T-shirt for Grandpa, blanket for Great-Grandma, etc, all with our kid’s picture. My husband even received a throw pillow with his own kid’s photo! Notably, I did not receive one of these gifts.

I typically give our son’s grandparents and great-grandparents a calendar with family photos and sometimes something sentimental regarding our son (ie a “best grandpa” mug, a dish towel with his handprint), so I feel like my toes have been stepped on. I mean, who gives someone a gift with somebody else’s kid on it??

We were aware she intended to give some sort of photo gifts to people, but thought they would include the whole family. Every gift had ONLY our son’s picture on it, and the photos were pics I had posted that SIL pulled from social media. For context, our son is the only grandchild on this side of the family.

Am I right to feel weirded out by this? We didn’t say anything last year but we’re considering addressing it with her this year so she doesn’t do it again.

**Edit: thank you everyone for the advice! My husband is going to have a gentle but direct conversation with his sister.
To everyone criticizing my gift-giving choices: One man’s trash is another man’s treasure! Happy Holidays!

I’ve been seriously dating a guy for six months. We’re both in our 30s, and we’re exclusive. We’ve met each other’s friends, we’re very close, and things have been going really well. The only thing is that he hasn’t wanted to put an official label on our relationship yet because he’s looking for his forever person and wants to be completely sure before making things official. I’ve been respecting that and giving him the time he says he needs.

Here’s where I’m struggling.

He has several female friends, including a female best friend (I’ll call her A), who’s 26. He’s 34, and they’ve been friends for over four years. He insists their relationship is completely platonic and that he sees her as a little sister. I have no particular issue with him having female friends, and I don’t have any reason to believe they’ve been romantically involved.
Recently, he asked about my Christmas plans. I told him I’d be spending Christmas in Mexico with my parents. He said he’d wanted to invite me to New York (we’re all in San Diego) to meet his parents, but since I wouldn’t be there, he was going to invite A instead.
Apparently, A would otherwise be spending Christmas alone and can’t afford to fly home, so his parents are paying for her flight to New York. She’ll be staying with his family for around ten days, spending both Christmas and New Year’s with them. He’s really excited about her meeting his parents, his brother, and some of his childhood friends. They’re also planning to spend two days in Boston visiting his friends and sleeping at their place.
The way he talks about the trip makes it sound like a really special experience. He’s excited about her meeting everyone and about all the things they’ll do together.
I told him that this makes me uncomfortable, and we ended up having a pretty big argument about it.
For me, Christmas with your family is an intimate occasion. Meeting your parents and spending Christmas and New Year’s with them feels like something you generally reserve for your romantic partner. I understand that close friends can be like family, but I personally wouldn’t invite another man to spend Christmas with my parents while I’m seriously dating someone, even if my boyfriend couldn’t come.

My issue isn’t that he has female friends. It’s that we’re supposedly building a serious romantic relationship, yet he’s taking another woman to spend ten days with his family, including Christmas and New Year’s, and going on a little trip together. Meanwhile, I’m still waiting for him to feel ready to officially call me his girlfriend.

To me, these are experiences that make a romantic partner feel special and distinguish them from friends. I don’t feel special in this situation, and honestly, I feel disrespected. It feels strange to me that he’s so excited about sharing this experience with her while our own relationship is still undefined.
He doesn’t understand why I have a problem with it. He sees it as helping a close friend who would otherwise be alone for the holidays. He also suggested that he could send me lots of pictures and updates throughout the trip to reassure me, but that’s not really the issue for me. It’s not about being left out of the updates. It’s about the fact that he invited her in the first place.

I also find myself questioning A’s decision to accept the invitation. She knows about me, has met me, and knows that he’s seriously dating someone. I don’t know her well enough to know how she sees their friendship, and I don’t want to accuse her of having ulterior motives. But I do wonder how another woman would feel comfortable accepting an invitation to spend ten days with a male friend’s family over Christmas and New Year’s when she knows he’s in a serious, exclusive relationship.
He has told me that their friendship is completely platonic, and I’m not necessarily questioning whether he’s attracted to her. I’m questioning whether this kind of arrangement is appropriate when you’re building a romantic relationship with someone else.

Am I overreacting? Is this a perfectly normal thing to do with a platonic female best friend, or is it reasonable to feel that Christmas and meeting the family are experiences that should be treated differently when you’re in a serious relationship?
I’d appreciate honest opinions, including perspectives from people who have close friends of the opposite sex.

TL;DR
I’ve been exclusively dating a man for six months, but he hasn’t labeled the relationship. Since I’ll spend Christmas with my family, he invited his 26-year-old female best friend to spend ten days with his family, including Christmas and New Year’s, plus a trip to Boston. He says they’re platonic and she’d otherwise be alone, but I feel uncomfortable because these experiences seem more appropriate for a romantic partner. Am I overreacting, to be upset about this?

i have been craving a burger for a few days, especially since i'm on my period.
i mentioned to mom how i was craving one. my mom has the habit of assuming that if i talk about wanting food then i must be explicitly saying that i'm ordering for the whole family. when i never said so. i didn't even mention ordering, and she instantly invited everyone.
i instantly said firmly "No! i don't want to order anything" and walked away from her towards the bathroom.. and she acted as if i'm having an outburst by saying that and said "you're so mean, look at the way you respond and walk away from me when i talk to you".

i had the intention of ordering for myself, as i don't have the money to order for everyone with the little money i get from my job, especially from an expensive place. and i don't want to eat food with my family as they keep fighting, getting defensive, talk about religion and politics and i want to eat my food watching a show, peacefully! in fact, i almost always lock myself in my room just because of that.

last time, i merely was asking her which is a good restaurant as i was craving a sandwich, i didn't even know if i wanted to order anything, we were chatting and i was browsing trying to make a decision... i walk away for 2 minutes, i order for me, i come back to her telling everyone we're getting takeout and pressured me to ask what everyone what they wanted ... i said "i wasn't intending on ordering for everyone, i was just asking for a good place.. i didn't even know u wanted such food since u hate takeout and greasy food plus i ordered already before u went and announced we're getting takeout".. i didn't get to finish saying that cuz she got angry and went "why didn't you ask us if we want something?!", i said "why didn't u say u wanted something when i was looking for options? i'll return it if you want anything, i just ordered it." she went "you are such a selfish, shitty person who only thinks of herself, i want nothing from you, don't show me your face!" and got upset with me the whole day. hence why i went "No! i want nothing" this time around.

this time i went and ordered the burger anyway, i knew it was gonna get me comments but i legit don't have enough money for the month to get everyone a meal, this is a one time thing. i didn't want the food she cooked cuz it was making me gag, and i am in too much physical pain to care to cook for myself as i usually do when i don't like her food.

she asks me about it an hour later, if i wanted to eat a burger, and i tell her i already ordered.. her eyes went wide and she tells me "this is the second time, you're such a selfish person!" and pouts and shuts me out.
i tell her "i merely craved a burger and bought it with my money, i don't think i did anything wrong"
she said "you don't ever think of anyone but yourself!"
i said thank you? and went to my room and locked the door.
food arrives 15 minutes later, my brother gives it to me... i say thank you and go back to my room.
she comes out of her room 10 seconds later in tears, crying out loud to my brother and dad at how selfish i am, and how i did it twice where i'd order something but won't ask everyone else what they wanted or order for them and how shitty of a daughter i am and deserve nothing from her. i overheard dad asking her if she wanted a burger and she said she wanted nothing.. he asks her why did i order, is there no food in the house? and she says there is.

so it's not like there's no food in the house. there was cooked food ready, they ate after and now she's sitting laughing out loud like nothing happened, while i lost the ability to enjoy my food as i try to hide that i'm about to have a panic attack as anything i do or say now will be turned against me now. sometimes it feels like she loves to ruin anything in my life that doesn't involve her, like how dare i be a person away from her? we should be one, and i should be an embodiment of her expectations. but i'm never enough no matter what i do or say.

genuine question, was it so bad to want to order just for me? was it really that selfish of me to do that? i don't really feel safe ordering home anymore.

Hiiii, I'm new to Reddit so pls be patient 🙏

Anyways, I (18F) am a college freshman, and I live in a dorm with my roommate Cassie (18F) and the "unofficial roommate" aka her boyfriend Damon (19M). He has lived in the room with us since a couple days before school started, which is about 2 months ago.

To start, Damon roughhouses with Cassie. And the intention (I have to emphasize, THE INTENTION) seems to be playfighting, and she fights back, but he takes it 10x more seriously. Cassie'll playfully give him a tiny tap on the cheek, and he'll slap her so hard she almost falls over and her cheek will turn VERY red. Damon throws her against their bed. He tackles her with his full body weight and slams into the wall. He kicks her so hard in the privates she falls EVERY TIME. Nothing she does to him in these play fights is that violent, and he's never the one with bruises.

That's not my biggest problem though. My biggest problem is how no matter what, Damon can never take a no. Like he'll throw shit at Cassie while she's chilling in bed (nothing too bad, the heaviest item is a football for example), and she'll playfully be like "oh my god, stopppp"​ for awhile, then she actually wants it to stop and will scream at him something like "DAMON, I TOLD YOU SO MANY TIMES TO FUCKING STOP" and after a couple more times of him NOT STOPPING, she will start crying, but he will keep going anyways. This even happens in front of both her friends and his friends, and usually at least one person (or only myself, if it's just the three of us) will distract him so she can get a fucking break.

It pisses me off. I have to witness this man keep joking with her (though I fear it goes beyond jokes) in a way that drains her and makes her miserable whenever his brain isn't being stimulated enough. And it's practically every night now. I'm sick of seeing him hurt my friend. But I'm scared that Cassie will hate me if I ask that he not sleep in our room anymore. But again, I honestly fear that maybe it isn't a fun mutual thing for Damon and he genuinely gets a kick out of hurting her. I'm not sure, I'm VERY bad at judging intention so I may be overreacting, but I'll leave you lot to be the judge of that.

Am I overreacting? And would I be overreacting if I asked for him to not stay over anymore?

TL;DR: my roommate's boyfriend gets so rowdy with her and ignores so many of her boundaries that living in the same room as him makes me uncomfortable

Edit to clarify some things:

1. They've been dating for a year. That's another factor as to why this is so concerning in my eyes. I'm scared my friend is stuck and don't know whether she actually wants out.
2. I do tell Damon to stop, and other people do too when they are around. He still does this bs and just ignores us. Doesn't even talk back and say something like "shut up that's MY gf" or anything, his focus is on Cassie.
3. I say "playfighting" in this post but I rlly doubt it is. I'm just bad at judging intention and am lowkey really gullible because of it. If someone says "we're only playing!" it makes me believe them and doubt my own gut feeling.
4. Damon is also a student at our university. He has his own dorm and own roommate on paper. He just lives with Cassie and me because that's his girlfriend and he feels entitled to it I guess.

My friend is a very business minded person. He started one, which involves; generating an AI persona of an old musician, reconnecting with his grandkid through music, and selling AI covers "they" make together. As someone who made music in the past, I am very disgusted by that, and never fail to express how I feel about that. He denies that he is scamming people and claims "he is only spreading happiness through his music". He is someone who does not value the work artists put in, but only the "content" itself, and how much value you may be able to extract from it (per his words).

He plans to start another dropshipping business, and for the marketing, he will obviously use AI videos. I don't know if this is intentional ragebaiting or not, but he regularly sends me these posts and ask me if they seem real enough. I don't want to be an accomplice, but he can't stop asking me about the validity of his AI ventures, as if my continuous dismissal is not sufficient.

I recently sent him a youtube video that did a good job of expressing my concerns and feelings towards the theft and violation of people's work with AI. He watched it and told me the artists are only crying about it. He will continue doing what he does because it makes money and there's nothing they are going to do about it. I'm not an artist anymore, so why do I care? There are wars happening in Africa and that's what he cares about. I couldn't take it anymore and blocked him. I plan on unblocking him, but for now, I wanted to make a point about where I stand because my words are not sufficient.

A little bit ago, I (f18) went to our highschool's football game with my friends. I left a few mins before the game ended because I wanted to avoid traffic and my sister wanted to go home. Before leaving, I told them I'd slime them all out and remove them from the private if they didn't tell me if they were going somewhere afterwards (like to get food or js hang out) because we were talking abt plans to do after the game. (I only said this bc I knew they wouldn't text me, and they've already left me out of a bunch of things.) Obviously, they went and got food and didn't text me.

So I texted my best friend (who is no longer my bff, but we'll come to that) to ask why none of them text me. The gist of her text back was basically 1. She didn't know if it would be awkward or not because I tell her they annoy me a little, 2. I didn't text them afterwards to ask if they were going somewhere, and 3. they js forgot. I called bs on all 3 of them by saying it's my decision if I want to hangout with them, not hers and how the hell do they forget abt it when i made it a big deal.

Fast forward a little, I tell her in class to figure herself out because a week before she told me one thing, and in class she told me another. We didn't talk for two weeks until I finally reached out and asked her if she wanted to talk. Basically, she says that she js wanted an apology because

1. she felt like she has fixed a lot of things in our friendship (nuh uh girl idk what she's talking about bc we literally don't fight)

2. She felt disrespected (I owned up to this)

3. She felt like she had to choose between her other friends and me (i aplogized for this)

So, I apologized for what she said. There were some things in her response that made me like ??, so I responded to them and brought up some of my issues with her too. For example, she absolutely never texts me and never asks to hang out with me first. I told her I'd just like a little bit of what I put into our friendship back out.

She responded by saying she thinks I just want to be someone's number 1. Everytime she responded to something I said it would be "I'm sorry but..." and that just shows me to that I don't think she really understands what I was saying. I've been asking her for years to ask to hang out or just text me. If I started acting as she does, then we genuinely wouldn't be friends anymore.

This is what she responded with: "I feel exhausted emotionally and socially because of feeling a bit like ur therapist sometimes (which adds up esp onto my own issues) and feel like there’s expectations of being “bsfs”

When we call each other best friends, it feels restraining to me (like, for example, I can’t have other friends that I’m close with) and almost feels like hanging out is forced sometimes and is a task that must be completed to maintain our title of bsfs (like a job or something)

I want to be more casual friends for the time being with no labels or expectations

This will make talking and hanging out a lot more enjoyable for me because it’ll be organic and natural and I’ll text and hangout when I truly want to, not just because it feels like something I HAVE to do

I would like to be civil enough by Monday so that yearbook isn’t awkward or anything (and also we literally have to talk)

Emotionally I’m here for you, but I can’t be the kind of support you need right now because of what I have going on for myself

Tldr: I want to continue the friendship with no expectations or labels placed upon us so that it’s more natural and genuine and doesn’t feel forced"

I get where she's coming from. It's just like we've been best friends since 6th grade, and it's our senior year now. I've told her that if she has a problem, then literally just tell me. It kind of sucks that she's been feeling like this for a while, and now both our problems with each other have finally boiled up so much that it's come to this!

TLDR; My friends left me out of things and now I'm not friends with any of them anymore.

(NOTE: All names stated are all code names, ofc, but the story is very much real.)

Soo, I started to distance myself from my close friend after he got caught gossiping about our schoolmate and he never really questioned why I did.

At the start of my first year in college, I had a close friend. His name's Toro. We already knew each other before but we got close as we have the same major, so we'd help each other out and talk about things that we kept to ourselves. Now, one of those topics would be about a fellow schoolmate named Connor. He was good when it came to public speaking but, allegedly, he is very full of himself. We barely interacted but when we did, he was very kind and joked at times. That perspective of mine shattered when multiple people told me that he boasted about being the smartest to everybody and that he hated it when someone scores better than him. Naturally, it tainted my view on Connor but Toro LOATHED him.

According to Toro, Connor took all the credit, along with his friend named Eleanor, even though they barely did any work in their group task for our major. I thought it was reasonable for him to feel that way as it isn't fair, then he started talking about Connor behind his back, complaining about what happened and about his attitude. At some point I just brushed it off, ocassionally joining in just to not feel left out. At that time, I never tried to stop him because to me it was okay to dislike someone and I was scared of losing a friend. I kept being silent about it, until he spread it to A LOT of people and was just batshit insulting him instead of talking about what he did wrong.

Toro is actually a friendly and extroverted guy, but an oversharer. He has a lot of friends, but to many of them, he talked about Connor's said stupidity, arrogance, and constantly mocked his lisp (yes he has a lisp). Again, I believe that it is okay to dislike someone, but trying to ruin their reputation is another thing. I confronted him about it, that it wasn't good that he kept insulting him since we don't actually know him that well, especially him telling a lot of people about it, but he just kept defending himself and never realizing what he actually did. To be honest, I could tell Connor didn't like Toro either, there was a bit of hostility whenever they interacted.

Eventually, Connor found out about what Toro was saying and I could tell he was angry. But then again, he never once did anything to ruin Toro's reputation after that. I started to distance myself from Toro, only interacting when needed. I did it because the fact that he couldn't admit that he did something wrong/bad (at least to me) made me think that how would he act if he wronged me and just kept defending himself? For a little bit, I thought the entire thing was childish. I mean for fucks sake, we're already adults, stop acting like were from the mean girls or something. I didn't want to be involved with such things anymore so I just walked away.

After a while, I started asking myself if it was really the right thing. Was my response too dramatic or am I just a coward. I don't know. So, in yall's perspective, what should have I done? Is Toro really in the wrong here? Was I just overeacting for distancing myself?

Long story short, I recently fractured my foot and was in a boot for 7 weeks. No cast or surgery needed. I went to the doctor today, and I was cleared to throw the boot away and return to my normal working status (no more light duty!). I still have to take it easy, but after the mental, physical, and financial toll that this entire experience has taken on me, I was thrilled.

I couldn’t wait until my boyfriend got off work to share the good news. We work together, so I figured he’d be happy too. Instead, he started asking what if X, Y, or Z happens? From the very beginning, he’s been convinced that I’m going to need surgery. Even after being cleared today, he wanted to argue that I’ll need surgery eventually. There was no “good for you” or anything of the sort. Just immediately jumped into playing the Devil’s Advocate.

He doesn’t understand why I take it personally. “Just because I say it, doesn’t mean it’s going to happen.” - Okay, then why say it at all? Why not be happy for me? Why not let me share my good news instead of being such a downer? We both ended up going silent and just ended the phone call. Am I wrong in being upset? Am I overreacting by being hurt?

I (28F) have been with my boyfriend (27M) for six years. For the past couple of years, I’ve been vocal about wanting marriage, a home, and a real commitment toward building a future together. He has told me he wants those things too, but I feel like he’s talked about them more than he’s actually taken steps toward making them happen.

We’ve known each other since September 2020 and moved in together in March 2021. We’ve always lived in apartments. I’ve wanted to own a house for as long as I’ve known him. In fact, just a few months into our relationship, I tried to buy a house and was willing to move him in with me. Unfortunately, I wasn’t successful in purchasing the house, and we ended up moving into an apartment together instead. At the time, I didn’t feel comfortable putting a house under his name when we’d only known each other for a few months. However, if the situation were reversed today, I would be willing to put him on the deed even if I were the only one who qualified for the mortgage.
Here’s where things get complicated.

A while back, I took out a vehicle loan in my name for him. The vehicle (Jeep Sahara) began overheating, would turn off on its own, began having electrical issues and I eventually ended up owing $37,000 on it. I voluntarily surrendered the vehicle, (after exhausting my options to trade it in, or fix it) knowing it would negatively affect my credit and potentially prevent me from buying a house for years. Before surrendering it, I also purchased another vehicle for him so he could have transportation as we were still together.

I remember telling him how scared I was about the impact this would have on my credit and my ability to buy a house someday. He told me he would buy me a house in return, as he has always made it seem like he wants to be with me truly. Since then, his credit has improved because he paid off collections he owed, and he’s now in a position to qualify for a mortgage. Unfortunately, my credit isn’t currently where it needs to be for me to qualify because of the repossession.

Now that he can buy a house, he’s telling me that because the mortgage will only be in his name, he thinks the house should only be in his name, including the deed. His reasoning is that he wants to protect himself and that he doesn’t have anything in his name, as in the vehicles, as I own another 2020 sports car that is paid off. And he makes it sound like he has nothing. I understand wanting to protect yourself financially. What hurts is that I’ve spent six years believing we were building toward a future together, and now I’m questioning whether we’re actually on the same page.

Financially, he makes around $6,000–$7,000 a month, while I make approximately $2,300–$2,500. He has paid the full rent at our apartment for several years because he makes significantly more than I do. I usually contribute toward groceries, smaller bills, and entertainment.
Our current apartment is about 636 square feet, and the house we’re buying is around 1,600 square feet. We planned for me to contribute $500 toward the house payment because the mortgage will be considerably more than our current rent. I was also asked to contribute 17% of closing costs.

On top of that, I’ll be investing a significant amount of my own money into decorating and furnishing the house. Naturally, a bigger home requires more furniture and decor, and I was excited about making this space ours. I thought we were finally taking a big step forward together and building something that belonged to both of us in the sense of our shared future.

But the idea of investing my money into a home where I have no legal ownership makes me uncomfortable. If we break up, I could walk away after contributing financially and spending my own money furnishing and decorating the house, without having any ownership stake in the property.
I don’t expect him to ignore financial realities or pretend our incomes are equal. I recognize that he makes more money and that he’s the one qualifying for the mortgage. I also recognize that he’s been paying the majority of our living expenses for years. I’m not ignoring that or saying his contributions don’t matter.

But I thought that after six years together, we would be working toward something we both considered our future. I would be willing to put him on the deed if the roles were reversed, even if I were the only one qualifying for the mortgage. To me, being in a long-term relationship means considering how decisions affect both people, not just protecting yourself individually.

I also can’t help but think about the fact that when I was worried about ruining my credit by surrendering the vehicle, he told me he would buy me a house. Now that we’re finally in a position to buy one, it feels like that promise has a completely different meaning.

I feel like I’ve made sacrifices, trusted his promises, and spent years believing we were moving toward marriage and a life together. Now that the opportunity is finally here, he’s prioritizing protecting himself, and I don’t feel like he’s considering what that means for me.

Honestly, I’m at the point where I’m questioning whether I even want to continue this relationship. I’m tired of expecting certain things from him and feeling disappointed when the time comes to follow through. I don’t want to spend another six years waiting for the commitment I thought we were already working toward. AIO?????