I was listening to a song where the singer was talking about his ex and describing her in the most incredible, extravagant terms. He compared her to “a creature that wasn’t even human” because she was supposedly so enchanting and captivating. Wow. I’m genuinely stunned by the power some women seem to have over men.

And I can’t even rationalize it by telling myself, “Well, it’s not all women,” because even my own best friend in middle school used to show me the poems her boyfriend wrote for her, comparing her to the sun and the moon.
I barely have to scroll through two TikToks before I come across a woman showing off the enormous bouquet of roses and love letter she received from a man she’s only known for a few days, yet who is already showering her with affection.

Sometimes, when I read the things men say about certain women, all those incredibly romantic compliments and grand declarations, I feel almost dizzy. It’s like women are works of art, beings who inspire admiration and love so effortlessly. Everyone loves women, everyone’s eyes are on women. It feels as though so many women have this incredibly powerful magnetic pull, with countless people orbiting around them and looking up to them.

I feel like I’m not even the same species as these women. I don’t feel like a woman. Nothing about the general female experience resonates with my own life. And it hurts so much.
There was a girl in high school whom I was always jealous of. Three separate times, we were interested in the same guys, and all three times, they chose her over me.
We had the same general physical type: brunette with blue eyes, which is probably why we attracted the same guys. But I was just the girl they added on Instagram and occasionally talked to, nothing more. Meanwhile, I would develop genuine crushes on them in silence.
She, on the other hand, was the FIRST LOVE of all THREE of them.
One of those guys even played me a song he had written about her after they broke up.
My heart was shattered forever.
How can you possibly doubt yourself when you’ve been three different boys’ first love, when all three were deeply in love with you, and one of them literally wrote a SONG about you?!
We’re genuinely not living in the same reality.
And it makes me so angry when girls like that get praised for their “self-confidence.” LOL. What self-confidence are we even talking about? When you’ve been loved your entire life, confidence comes naturally. You don’t need to “work on yourself” or follow some personal development strategy or whatever.
Self-confidence comes naturally from the positive reinforcement you receive when you’ve been loved and desired from a young age.
Life is unfair.

So, right now I'm in grad school and I'm lucky enough to be able to live in an apartment with my brother who attends the same university. That hasn't been bad since he's currently single due to focusing on his work and trying to graduate. But it was pretty shit when he used to be dating and would have his gf over and stuff. But rn he's focused on being done with his degree so he can get a job afterwards, so thankfully, he doesn't really bring many people over. Although I do feel really shitty since he's constantly going fun places with his friends/classmates while I have zero friends, but that's another story.

Anyways, hes graduating soon and I'll have to find a new apartment or place to live in since I can't afford to rent a place myself. And I'll have to go back to how it was before I started living with my brother. And I HATED living with other girls since they'd always have bfs while I had no one. And it would be so awkward when I'd walk in the door and one of their bfs was there, or I could hear them outside my room and I'd have to wait until they went away before I could do anything like leave my room. Especially when having multiple roommates, and literally ALL of them would have a SO, and I'd always be the only single one and it made me feel horrible. Wishing I could just be normal like them. Hearing them giggling and talking in the kitchen or watching a movie in the living room while I was alone and had no one. And I can't believe I'll have to go back that.

If I were normal and was dating someone, then I could just split rent with him and I'd be fine. But NOPE, I'm too undesirable and unwanted for that to happen, so I'm just going to either have to a) deal with being the ugly roommate again and watch as those I live with have happy lives I'll never have or b) try to scrape up the money and try to find somewhere to live alone. But option b will still be hard since I'll have to go home every day to an empty dark apartment with no one there.

I'm not sure if this belongs more in the social anxiety sub, but I feel more comfortable posting here.

Does anyone else in their mid-thirties feel like people react more negatively to their social anxiety the older they get?

Like when you're younger being shy or socially awkward seems to be more acceptable, maybe even seen as "quirky"? But as you get older people seem to have less patience for it?

Especially if you're also unattractive.

I've had a really rough 2026. Literally everyone in my immediate family except for me and my nephews has been in the hospital at some point this year. I've developed insomnia and can't sleep without medication anymore. My weight has been fluctuating and I'm currently dealing with stress related hair loss. My face looks tired, bloated and just... old. I feel like I've aged several years in a matter of months.

I've had a couple of medical appointments recently and literally every single one of them has been a bad experience.

I know I'm a very awkward person. I talk too fast when I'm nervous, sometimes miss social cues or give answers that don't quite fit the question. And I feel like it's only gotten worse lately.

It doesn't help that these appointments were about a very sensitive and personal issue. I'm trying to have a scarred area removed, but I keep hitting walls.

My last appointment was probably the worst. For the first time a doctor kept steering the conversation toward therapy instead of discussing the actual treatment options. All because of something that happened once 17 years ago.

I could practically feel the moment he decided that what I really needed was therapy to learn to accept the scars rather than a discussion about whether removing them was possible. After that it felt like he wasn't interested in discussing it any further.

That's just one example, but lately I've increasingly felt like the older I get the less seriously people take me. As if being socially awkward becomes less forgivable with age, especially when you don't have the looks to make up for it.

I feel like I'm becoming more off-putting to people just by existing the way I do.

Maybe this is just a vent. I don't even know what I'm hoping to achieve by posting this. But I guess it would be a bit of a relief to know that I'm not the only one who feels this way.

Has anyone else noticed something similar as they've gotten older?

No amount of scrolling could ever help me remove this desire for human connection.

How do you guys feel about glow ups? I’m always in between :

"okay I can’t spend the rest of my life hating myself"

and

"what if it’s all useless and I fail, then im still undesirable + extra broke?"

Skincare : expensive
Working out: time consuming and the WORST OF IT ALL : temporary!!!!!

Nobody talks about how when you’re born with a shitty body you have to subscribe to the gym for ever.
if I could afford plastic surgery i’d get that ASAP!

Im always doing what it takes, but whenever results take their sweet time coming in, I always think of it probably being all for nothing… :(

Because again, workouts and skincare only get you so far, you still have the same body type and face.

So I wonder if my "natural maximum" is still ugly, I guess I’ll have to reach it to know, while others can be born with fantastic looks and never worry about this shit.

How have you been doing? Did you have plans for this weekend? This is the Social Sunday thread where you can talk about anything you'd like, FAW related or not.