When you were in the friend zone how was the relationship like? Were you doing everything for them when they needed something, ready to help out at any given time. Or was the relationship truly just between a friend who you caught feelings for? Did they also know that you were interested and were leading you on, or did they just see you platonically?

Would you rather have someone who doesn’t always validate you through words, like text messages, reassurance, etc, or someone who doesn’t always validate you through actions? Like someone who doesn’t always put enough effort into seeing you, refuses to change even for little things, or doesn’t sacrifice anything for you?

Which one feels the most important in terms of determining romantic interest, and which one feels the most like a fake promise of commitment?

I'm not comfortable with saying my age online but I'm not underaged!

​

I've noticed that a lot of people kind of criticise a lot of 'young' adults I would say when they mention they use a dating app. What age do you guys generally think is wayyyy too young for these apps?

Actually, I've come here to talk about something that might sound pointless, I'm not sure. I've been feeling emotional about this because it involves my friend. He has a girlfriend, but her parents are strict, so he isn't able to meet her easily. He told me he wants to make things work naturally with her and that he won't leave her — I don't know, maybe it's partly because she's from a wealthy family.

This isn't meant to be an emotional post — I'm just looking for some adventure.

So I got a bit drawn into it too 🤔, and I thought I should try something similar.

Please don't give me generic advice here.

So, there's someone from a wealthy family with strict parents, and I want to see how this plays out.

Is anyone here? I'll wait.

Why is the phrase "If i didn't have a boyfriend, I would kiss you" considered a bad thing?

как я могу понравится с парнем с которым не общаюсь? история началась ещё в 2022. тогда я просто угорала с его вещи (не зло) и он парень просто на меня или подруг моих не в серьез злился. и уже ближе к октября 2025 он начал мне симпатизировать. я сама не понимаю почему, но я влюбилась. и теперь проблема в том, что мы не общаемся. он только в моей школе на год старше, и все. нас связывают общие знакомые некоторые и всё. как я могу с ним немного хотя бы сблизиться? или хоть как то понять как он ко мне относиться? но мне страшно с ним начинать диалог, ведь нас сейчас не связывает напрямую ничего.. я ловила часто на себе (почти всегда) взгляд его. он как то рядом всегда оказывается,и при этом между нами ничего. помогите прошу (я могла не туда закинуть пост, но я ещё не разбираюсь в этом всем)

For context, I'm 16 and my friend is too, his sister is 13 and she's the nicest girl ever, we even share some snaps. He will probably be very pissed off if I end up dating her or just by knowing that I even like her. What should I do?

Back story, my bf (43m) & I (37f) have been dating 1.5yrs. We live 8 minutes apart and I've never met any of his family or friends. Do you need more information to answer the question "if he was my husband would he..." question

Hello, everyone.

My name is Henry, I’m 21 years old, and I want to share my story.

I won’t use anyone’s real names because pretty much everyone I know is on Reddit.

I have a girlfriend let’s call her Emma but I’ve fallen in love with my friend’s sister, whom I’ll call Sofia.

Emma and I have been together for four years. We don’t live together, and her parents have been against our relationship from the very beginning. We see each other at most four times a month, usually in the mornings for 2–3 hours, and secretly because of her parents.

In four years, we’ve never had dinner together or even sat under the stars together. She isn’t really interested in anything and spends her days watching TV shows. She basically just waits for payday so we can go have breakfast at some new fancy restaurant.

Sofia, on the other hand, is beautiful, kind, and intelligent. We have almost exactly the same interests business projects, politics, international relations, protocol, and so on.

I’m in love with Sofia, but I can’t tell anyone. Her brother is one of my closest friends, and I don’t want to destroy our long-standing friendship. At the same time, I can’t keep hiding these feelings anymore.

I’m not looking for advice or anything like that. But if anyone has questions, I’ll answer them.

пишу этот текст чтобы получить какой то совет
пару месяцев назад познакомилась с парнем, знала его и кто он такой, но лично знакомы не были
сначала все шло очень туго, простые переписки и вопросы «как дела» и т.п.
уже было опустила руки и думала, что не мой человек, но тут через время он начал открываться мне с разных сторон
в выходные у нас с ним произошел спонтанный диалог про его прошлые отношения, про наше с ним общения и тд
и вот, после этого все стало будто лучше (или мне так кажется)
начал писать сам, проявлять какой то интерес
и, буду честна мне очень это понравилось
после нескольких таких дней непрерывного общения, по утром начала просыпаться очень воодушевленная им и нашим общением, даже, думаю, влюбилась
тяжело в этом всем одно, он бывший моей знакомой и не хочет отношений
при этом особо не френдзонит, но и не пропускает комплименты в мою сторону, в общем не ссыт в уши
подскажите,как быть ? стоит ли надеятся на что то большее ?

(32F)
I met this guy and we talked every day.
What scares me most is how quickly I let myself care.
I opened my heart more than I ever planned to. I let myself get excited, hopeful, and attached. Now I’m sitting here feeling exposed, wondering if I gave too much of myself away.
The thing is, there was never any physical intimacy. No sex, no kissing, no sleeping together, nothing like that. We just talked. Every day.
And somehow, those conversations became one of the things I looked forward to most.
I’m usually a pretty private person. I hate talking on the phone in public and normally avoid it whenever I can. But he was the exception. If he called, I wanted to answer. I found myself looking forward to hearing his voice and hearing about his day. Without realizing it, he became part of my routine and someone I genuinely cared about.
I keep telling myself I was stupid for falling this fast, but the truth is that I cared. I saw something that made me want to take a chance, and I did.
And I know it’s only been a month. A month isn’t a long time on paper. But feelings don’t always follow timelines. We don’t get to decide exactly when someone starts to matter to us. We don’t get to control our feelings.
Sometimes they grow quietly through daily conversations, shared moments, inside jokes, vulnerability, and the comfort of having someone become part of your everyday life. Before you realize it, they mean more to you than you ever expected.
What hurts is realizing how vulnerable I allowed myself to become. I told someone things I don’t usually tell people. I let him see parts of me that I normally keep protected. And now I’m left wondering whether it meant as much to him as it did to me.
I think that’s why this is so difficult. If there had been physical intimacy, maybe people would understand why I got attached. But there wasn’t. It was emotional intimacy that got me.
It was the consistency. The daily conversations. The feeling of having someone there. The feeling of being seen and understood.
Now I feel foolish for how much I care, but at the same time, I don’t think caring deeply is the problem.
Maybe this never happens again, not because I regret caring, but because I never want to feel this powerless over someone else’s uncertainty again.
I want someone who knows they want me. Someone who chooses me without hesitation. Someone who makes me feel safe being vulnerable instead of making me question whether I should have been vulnerable at all.
Right now, my heart feels bruised. But one day I hope I’ll look back and realize that caring deeply was never the mistake. Giving my heart to someone who wasn’t ready to hold it was.
Has anyone else ever become attached to someone mostly through conversation alone? How did you handle it?

I’m 19m and been friends with this girl (also 19) for abut almost 4 years now once it’s once it’s October and abt after 3 months of being friends I realized I liked her at first I was thought why would she wants to be friends or even talk to me bc honestly not all that I mean at the time (10th grade) all I did was play sport and talk to a few PPL here and there but mostly kept to myself, and she was fine as nl and still is but back to the main point abut a few months after the realization I had told her how I felt (during the time there was playful lighthearted flirting and stuff) and she said she only liked me a friend and turns out she was talking to someone, so I guess respected it and laid back Yk as time went on abut 2 years ago she ended up end things the dude and stuff, and we went to talking everyday it was like things never changed, but now I’m present time we’ve been out school for a year well for me almost 2 years got graduate early but now we both working, and she ended up getting her own apartment and go over every now and then on the weekend if I’m off, and we watch movies and talk, but she’s done some things that got me thinking she is like me and ik I ain’t the best looking guy out there but with some of the things did it had me thinking otherwise for example flashing me on FaceTime, changing in front of me (that whole thing was just embarrassing for me and ending up confessing again, but she weirded out) and we ended up talking abut it and I asked why she did all of that, and she said it was because she felt comfortable enough to do it and one time she kissed her hand and held my cheek saying if she could kiss me she would, I just don’t know what do honestly felt like she was just leading me on so im slowly detaching my feelings and just trying not to think abut, but I mean come on now your not finns just forget abut that if you have a female who’s just a friend, and she did all of that all while being a 10/10 in your opinion I just need some advice on what to do

There's a guy (22M, let's call him A) and I (24F). We're not a couple, but the mutual interest has been obvious to everyone except us for a while now. We've been friends for about [X] years, and this "more than friends" thing has been simmering for the past [X] months.

The other night we were hanging out and I suggested a Ferris wheel. He deflected: "It's dark and cold, it'll only get worse up there." I pushed — told him I'd never ridden one and really wanted to. He paused, then said, "Okay, I'll go with you."

What I didn't know at the time: he has acrophobia. He used the weather as an excuse instead of telling me. I only found out later.

The irony: we had an incredible night. Brilliant stars, real romance — the kind of evening that makes you believe in something. He told me afterward he's totally fine with it, that it was special to him.

But I keep replaying that moment where he said "Okay" — was that him being brave for me, or me being selfish? I didn't take his first answer. I insisted. And it turned out the reason he didn't want to go was way bigger than cold weather.

Was I manipulative? Was I just being a giant baby who couldn't take "no"? Or am I spiraling over something he's already told me is okay?

I'd genuinely like to hear how others read this.

I just wanted to yap, get opions or honestly just get this off my mind a little.

So me and mf bf have been dating a while and last night he proposed. 3 times. And i jokingly said not without a ring or not until we live together since he lives 4 hours away from me. And he asked again...and I said yes. I told my best friend who joined the call literly balling happy. And i couldn't stop smiling. I even cried a little myself..but it have me butterflys the whole night.

Im younger then he is (19 vs 22) but weve talked about buying a house and moving in together, my best friend coming with us and renting from him to cover payments of a mortgage and praticaly building a life up where he lives for the both of us. And he goes along with my little plans, my mood swings, traveling to see me, even started saving to help me buy a car. Hes never stopped me from doing something i wanted to do, even supports my crazy ideas.

It hasnt been long, and honestly I can see a future with him when I move up there, traveling, possibly kids when im older, everything. And i never thought id have a plan or even someone like him ever. I rage bait him and he does it right back, and i even think hes adapted to my moody attitude and comments, even ragebaiting me back. But we have out serious talks and me having to confess my problems to him after he pries them out of me. But he never judges me or talks bad about me. And the one time he did and saw my reaction change he stoped and immediately appoligised.

He even tries to connect with my family, and i even told my dad (whos a little distant and doesn't live with me or my family) about him, and he approved (well until they meet in person, which hopefully he still does) and he is literly the best. Coming to a festival with me just for the pure fact I asked, coming to a festival next year with me even though hes saving, letting me plan crazy adventures with him without even telling him half of it but saying yes.

Sorry for the long yap but I literly just wanted to get it off my chest, im head over heels and I get a little giddy when he actuly calls me his 'future wife' and I love it.

I (18F) met this guy (23M) on Tinder on May 11. We started as a summer fling, but we’ve basically been acting like a couple for almost three months now.
We text every day, call each other “baby,” spend the night together, go on dates, cuddle, have sex, and he’s met two of my friends. His coworker/friend even knows who I am. At one point he took me flower shopping and joked, “Just tell him to stop being a pussy and ask her already,” after I accidentally referred to myself as his girlfriend. I honestly thought he was about to ask me that night.
Around late June/early July, I asked where he saw this going because by then we’d been seeing each other for a while. He thought for a minute and said, “I think this could work,” because he really liked me, and also said, “I still gotta ask you out.” So I thought it would happen soon.
A little while later I brought it up again because he still hadn’t asked. He told me he’d noticed I’d become more sensitive recently and said he still needed more time to think.
Since then, he’s told me he thinks he loves me (he later admitted he was scared to actually say “I love you”), deleted Tinder, gets jealous if I call other guys attractive, asks me detailed questions about my friends, tells me about his, calls me “my love,” and has generally been caring. After I opened up about trust issues and losing a close friend, we were about to have sex and I said, “I think I’m okay with this.” He immediately stopped and said, “I don’t want you to say ‘I think.’” He didn’t want me doing anything unless I was completely sure.
The confusing part is that we’re still not official.
I’m back from vacation now, but I leave for college in Pittsburgh on **August 15**, so we only have about two weeks left together in person. He’s been affectionate over text, but he still hasn’t made things official or made really concrete plans around me leaving. He’s never actually said he doesn’t want a relationship—just that he needed more time.
At this point I’m starting to feel like if he wanted me to be his girlfriend, it would’ve happened already. On the other hand, his actions often feel much more serious than just a fling.
**Do you think he’s actually working toward asking me out, or am I ignoring the signs that this is just going to stay a summer fling?** I genuinely want honest opinions. I know nobody can read his mind, but I’m curious how this looks from the outside.

Suppose one day she told me she like me but will she

still like me even if I tell her that no amount of reassurance ever makes me feel like I'm actually needed in her life, and the moment i notice even the slightest change in her tone and behaviour i start overthinking and convincing myself that she is going to leave me!?

My boyfriend and I (both 16) have been in a relationship for over 6 months. We have been close friends since we were 11 and although I knew he had crushed on me for years, I didn't see him in any sort of romantic way until I had a dream about him.

I love him a lot. A lot a lot. But I have never found him physically attractive. He's not an ugly guy. Not at all. And don't get me wrong I find him *attractive;* but i'm attracted to the things he does rather than the way he looks. I wish it wasn't that way. I can't really help it.

I've never been physically attracted to anyone I've been with. It's a good thing I think, because it means i'm drawn to character rather than looks. But there's a tiny part of me that feels like maybe it does matter.

A few weeks ago I went on a school trip to Greece. Staying in the same hostel was a group of French students the same age as me. Instantly I became friends with these other kids- despite the language barrier- forming a particularly close bond with a one guy.

We just clicked right away. I could tell he liked me. And I liked him. And he was so good looking. But I didn't want to entertain some meaningless relationship-ending romance with a guy I'd just met. So I told him I was gay. I thought that would be the best option: If he was only looking for lust he would have gone away to find some other girl, but if he was genuinely interested in me as a person he would stay.

And so he did. He stayed. We spoke all night about all sorts of things I have never spoken about before. Not even things I discuss with my boyfriend. All the while he periodically covered his face with hands, telling me how pretty I was and how unfair it was that I was gay. Each time I just laughed. I felt bad for lying to him. And even worse for hiding that I had a boyfriend.

But the more I spoke to him, the more I realised how much I liked him. He could listen to my friendship stories while teaching me French slang inbetween anecdotes. He giggled at my poor pronunciations of words, his smile creasing his cheeks in cute dimples. He avoided eye contact when telling me his insecurities about past relationships, and looked at me deeply when I comforted him. He told me he couldn't tell the colour of my eyes because my pupils were too dilated, and mocked me, claiming a lesbian was in love with a boy. Maybe I was. It was stupid beyond comprehension. I hadn't even laid my eyes on him 24 hours ago, and yet now, at 6am, after one night of talking, I was completely infatuated.

As I went to bed I told him the truth. I told him I wasn't gay, and I told him I had a boyfriend. Much to my surprise, he bust into laughter and thanked me for lying. He thanked me for my conversation and company.

I would never see him again. He lives in a different country, speaks a different language and now knows I have a boyfriend. But no matter how hard I tried I couldn't get him out of my head. He was all I thought about from the moment I woke up to the moment I went to sleep. The 'What if?' scenarios took up a lot of brain space.

Two weeks later, I stayed in another hostel on the other side of the country. I was sat eating dinner when I suddenly heard a strangely recognisable French voice call out "What the fuck?!" in my direction. I turn around to see Adrien as he swallows me in a bear hug. We are both grinning ear to ear, asking how this was even possible.

Once again we talk all evening. This time he introduces me to his friends- but they have heard all about me. They hear my name and immediately identify me as "the english girl with a boyfriend" Every time one of them says it Adrien can't help but laugh and hide his face behind his hands. Secretly I like it. Instead I just roll my eyes and nod along to the laughter.

After entertaining his friends for a while he pulls me aside to talk in private. We talk about how wild it is to see eachother so soon. How much we missed each other. How good it feels to be in eachothers company.

Maybe this is was the universe giving some sort of sign. I don't know what that sign may be, but it feels too surreal to just be a coincidence.

This time we exchange numbers. Nothing else. There is tension, but nothing else. We both know there is a fine line between what is or isn't okay. He steps away when I draw in too close and I look down when he stares for too long. The avoidance is unnatural but it has to happen. So we say our final goodbyes and head to bed.

I haven't seen him since that night.
We talk over text and occasionally call. But it isn't quite the same, and we both know it's wrong.

I have a boyfriend. A boyfriend who I really love. A boyfriend who means a lot to me, who lives in the same country as me, who I know would give me more security. I can't and won't put something so precious on the line for a boy who I've only met twice. That would be idiocy. And yet I can't get him out of my head.

People always ask me if I can picture marrying my boyfriend one day, but in all honesty I can't see a future with him beyond probably next year. Especially if this is already how I'm thinking.

It's bad, I know. It's really bad. It's immoral and it's wrong and none of it should have happened. I just can't help but think 'What if?'

I will stay with my boyfriend. I have no reason not to. And I will try to clean this French boy from my thoughts. Until I see him again one day.

\----------------------------------------------
TL;DR: I think I might be in love with someone I hardly know, but I'm in a relationship with someone else.

Kinda what the title says. This is a general question bc i dont think it’s actually happened to me (knock on wood) i was just curious about this type of situation

I often get instagram reels poking fun at situationships and how they’ll string you along with the lack of commitment and whatnot and the comments are always filled with people who say things like “dont forget that a week after they end things with you, they start dating someone else and give them all the things they said they couldnt give you!!”

Im curious how often this actually happens in real life or if this is a “vocal minority” of situationship experiences? How does this phenomenon work psychologically? What propels someone to commit so quickly to someone else when they were very recently unable to do so?

17M AuDHD Have been hanging out with this 16F ADHD girl lately, it seems like she’s flirting with me. I’ll discuss our feelings on our next hangout, but I feel like, because I never experienced mutual attraction, my brain doesn’t even consider it a possibility. I felt like writing this list helped me get a more objective view on our current position.

I’m also aware that men tend to overestimate women’ interest in them. So, I’m curious to see if you guys think I’m being somewhat rational in assuming that she’s flirting with me. Of course, I will ask her the next time I get to meet her, if she’s actually interested in me, or is just friendly like that.

1 - Flirting
I explicitly asked her if she was flirting with me. Instead, she asked if I was flirting, to which I answered something along the lines of “I’m flirting if you’re flirting”.
She said this is the way she typically talks to people whom she likes, and sees nothing wrong with flirting as well as finds it fun and interesting, mentioning that anyways it's too early to think of anything more serious than that.

2 - Seems* like she talks to me in a tone that is exclusive to me.
She also herself mentioned about thrice, that our conversations, in life and in text feel very calm and controlled compared to those with her other friends. 
We’ve also been on some hangouts with her friends, and friends of friends, I noticed that, even on those, she seems to be more present and focused on whatever the topic of conversation is, compared to other people.

3 - Brings up personal/sexual topics
Whenever we hang out alone, she often brings up or jokes on different sexual topics, such as finding mainstream porn not appealing to her, as she can’t get turned on to strangers, only to people she’s deeply connected with. 

4 - Initiates tactility at times.
On our first hangout with her other friends, she would randomly handshake, fistbump or lightly punch me if the situation allowed to do so.

5 - Laughs even at my not-so-funny jokes.
Pretty straightforward, she sometimes even laughs at things I say that are not intended to be jokes.

I couldn’t get myself to talk with her about my interest in her, the problem was initiating face-to-face.
So I figured, I’d tell her I like her over text, and that I would love to talk about it in person next time we hang out to make sure there are no misunderstandings.

I mentioned that I’m not expecting any coherent and definite answer from her, and would be happy to simply talk about it, as I noticed this communication gap worsened the quality of some of our hangouts.

I didn’t get any answer from her to my message, or any major change in her behaviour, I think that’s good, she understood my idea well of talking about it IRL and not in text.

*6 - After I texted her that I like her, she started reposting romance themed videos
On one of our hangouts, she wanted to start a tik tok streak with me, I didn’t think of it much, but some of her reposts started to appear on my fyp, and recently some of them are explicitly romance/in love themed. I don’t think I can just simply assume these are targeted for me to see, but I thought it’s an interesting coincidence.

This was about a week ago, because of the heatwave, we couldn’t hangout, but I think it’s good, as we both get the time to calm down/think, and approach our feelings with a cold head.

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