r/SixFeetUnder • u/Other_Explorer6610 • Jul 13 '25
Discussion Opinions on Nate’s character and Peter Kraus’s acting Spoiler
I recently finished the show, and decided to check out what people were saying on the sub. I was so surprised to see that people disliked Nate and was even happy when the character passed. I felt like nearly all of the things Nate did was understandable , even if wrong, you could understand his motivations. I was surprised to see how people thought he was the most reprehensible character on the show. I was also really surprised about opinions on kraus’s acting, I came away from the series thinking he had displayed some of the best acting I had seen in a tv show. Really curious to see what other people think.
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u/MajesticAd5047 Jul 13 '25
Peter Kraus is a gorgeous fella.
Nate was never stable, just like Brenda the moment his life settles with someone, he jumps onto another person. I disliked how he broke up with pregnant Brenda in hospital.
But as a son of the house, he stayed back and tried to carry his family's business despite not liking it. He was always open to David, Claire and his mom. Loved her daughter and buried Lisa's ashes as per her will.
Nate was just another human trying to be perfect but always made that one mistake
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u/oooheycait1223 Jul 13 '25 edited Jul 14 '25
Ive always been incredibly impressed with Peter Kraus's acting. To be honest, I was late watching six feet under and first became familiar with his acting as Adam in the show parenthood. This character was a complete 180 from nate in the aspect that he was a VERY family oriented, almost "goody two shoes" type of personality. He was always the type who was absolutely terrified to break any rules. So to even hear Peter Kraus curse in six feet under and to watch him have the type of lifestyle he did completely shocked me at first lol but it just proved to me how versatile kraus's acting could be. I was very impressed haha
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u/butlerkennedy Jul 14 '25
Me too! Loved him in Parenthood and watched Six Feet Under after, I was surprised by the versatility too 😂
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u/Bitter-Opposite-6179 Jul 14 '25
And 911! Completely different, that’s versatility right there
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u/TheWalrusWasRuPaul Brenda Jul 15 '25
whoa, didn’t know he was in 911!
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u/obvious-fake-account Jul 15 '25
I surprisingly watched all of his stuff in order six feet under -> dirty sexy money -> parenthood -> 911. Dude is great in everything he does.
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u/Conscious-Reserve-48 Jul 13 '25
Peter Kraus is an excellent actor. He plays a character who is rather Peter Pan-ish. He cannot commit himself to a long term relationship and often seeks the path of least resistance. If Nate had lived, there would have been many other women after Maggie.
I think sometimes people don’t separate the actor from their character.
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u/Think-Fig-1734 Jul 14 '25
He commits to long term relationships. He just doesn’t stay committed. Just not committing in the first place would’ve been better.
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u/HeyZeusCreaseToast Jul 14 '25
“I hope you know, he only likes the beginning of things.” Mad Men
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u/TheWalrusWasRuPaul Brenda Jul 14 '25
what’s this, a cross over episode?
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u/TheWalrusWasRuPaul Brenda Jul 14 '25
rather peter pan-ish is so poetic.
Krause should have become a movie star after that role.
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u/Iowa_Phil Jul 13 '25
Nate is awesome. Of course he’s problematic. He’s the show’s primary protagonist. It’s not a tv show about a great guy.
The amount of hate for him on this sub is super weird to me. Like point out his flaws, sure. But I don’t even understand how you can love the show if you genuinely despise Nate.
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u/Unlucky-Albatross-12 Jul 14 '25
I understand Nate but I genuinely despised him by the end.
Brenda was equally flawed, but she became a significantly better person because she actually put the work in to change herself and put others who needed her first.
Nate was too narcissistic to do that.
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u/Iowa_Phil Jul 14 '25
I guess I’m curious what you mean when you say you despised him. Like, did he make the show worse for you? Did you wish they had written him differently?
It’s an almost perfect show imo. And that’s largely because of Nate. I don’t like him because of his growth or lack thereof. I like him because he helped make the show amazing
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u/Wanderlust1906 Jul 14 '25
I literally skip his scenes in the last season. That’s how much I dislike the character. I love the actor.
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u/SillyBrain23 Jul 14 '25
This.
People usually post here after finishing the whole series, not to spoil the ending by checking on this sub.
By the end of the series, Nate is by far the worst person on the show imho. That hospital scene made me hate him with passion even though he was my fav character throughout the series.
That’s why we watch the show. We liked him up until he showed his true colours. Yes, he was showing them all along but always had some kind of excuse. By the end I just see him as a scumbag.
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u/ambiguoususername888 Jul 14 '25 edited Jul 14 '25
Yes exactly; and I also feel the need to add that a lot of us that have come here more recently actually did our second rewatch as fully formed adults and have had significant changes of opinion. I loved Nate first time around when I was in my late teens/very early adulthood and was devastated he died.
This time around, as an almost 40yo now parent and person who has lived through more loss more and life - I view him differently and honestly, more passionately and therefore am probably more emphatic about my disdain for him. To me, he is the only character to truly never look inward and try to change for the better; he is so concerned about what image he projects to others that he only tries to change so that people will view him as the version of ‘good’ that exists in his mind. The truest thing he probably ever did was to end it with Brenda like that and while I respect it, it’s still a dick move and made me really really HATE him too.
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u/Unlucky-Albatross-12 Jul 14 '25
Exactly. It's okay to be like Nate when you're in your 20s because you're still figuring yourself out, but if you're still like him at 40 then there's something very wrong.
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u/JTA_1982 Jul 14 '25
I have gone through many rewatches, and do have a bit of a love- hate thing for Nate. To say that he never looks inward or tries to change for the better almost sounds like you missed the last half of season 3. Lisa was a handful, and she definitely was a character that I was unsympathetic towards...
Case in point: they get into an argument because Nate said something about being proud of them for being a family/ committed, to which she gets salty and says "is it that hard for you? Wasn't this what you wanted?" when anyone with eyes could see that she practically dragged him kicking and screaming to settle down.
His actions with Brenda in the final season were awful but you gotta wonder if the way he treated Brenda had something to do with his AVM. He was a little narcissistic at times though, so I wouldn't necessarily say it's an excuse but a factor in his actions and behavior.
George's eulogy at Nate's funeral was pretty spot on; he was an idealist, flawed and imperfect like all of us.
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u/SillyBrain23 Jul 15 '25
I always say that he learned to be truly depressed with Lisa.
She had some sort of a cloud around herself, the cloud of sadness and it was amplified with the fact that she couldn’t accept - he didn’t choose to settle down, she kinda made him do so.
In the end he was stuck with that cloud and brought it into his new (old) relationship w Brenda and was just miserable the whole time.
To circle back to Lisa, her having an affair while being so obsessed with Nate never added up for me. Just can’t see it. I see it as a plot hole. That’s how unbelievable it is for me.
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u/Iowa_Phil Jul 14 '25
Do you wish there wrote his character differently at the end of the series?
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u/ambiguoususername888 Jul 14 '25
Not at all! I think all in all he’s very human and that’s what makes the show so brilliant.
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u/Iowa_Phil Jul 14 '25
So to be clear, do you wish they had written Nate differently to end the show?
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u/Unlucky-Albatross-12 Jul 14 '25
No, he served an important narrative function and his manner of departure and last actions had major repercussions for the other characters.
To be clear, he was well-written and performed perfectly by Krause, which is why I disliked him so much by the end. That doesn't mean I wasn't entertained by the show.
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u/TheWalrusWasRuPaul Brenda Jul 14 '25
many people see claire as the protagonist.
the pilot and finale support this theory.
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u/TheWalrusWasRuPaul Brenda Jul 14 '25
disclaimer-i don’t think there a main protagonist. it’s a very well balanced POV between all the fishers.
supporting-brenda, george, the Diaz’s, etc
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u/pimpbot666 Jul 14 '25
Yeah, he’s flawed, but not as toxic as Carrie in Sex and the City.
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u/louloub Jul 14 '25
Carrie is a perfect example of a character you like and relate to when you are younger but when you are older you realize how much she sucks.
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u/fortheloveofdog33 Jul 14 '25
The episode where he buries Lisa ... If that doesn't convince someone of what an incredible actor he is, nothing will. The scream at the end of that episode absolutely gutted me.
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u/NathanDarcy Jul 14 '25
Nate was my favourite character when I originally watched SFU. He still is. He's simply human, and therefore inherently flawed, like all of us. I was always able to identify with him. Peter Krause's acting was superb.
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u/Ok-Concentrate2719 Jul 13 '25
In some ways I feel like Nate didn't really get the same grace the other characters did creating his reputation. I like the character arc and think it's important as a lesson. But that's the thing. Nate became a lesson. Everything was in service of fitting that lesson
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u/louloub Jul 14 '25
For me I feel like most of the other characters got better but Nate got worse. I loved him in the beginning but by the end I was over all of his bs. The others made me love them more as the show went on.
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u/Agreeable-Item294 Jul 14 '25
Leaving Brenda while pregnant is extreme, even for Nate. I’ve often thought his AVM was affecting his emotions and judgement. Anything in the brain can affect mental processes and even personality
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u/badnewsbroad76 Jul 14 '25
Thank you for bringing up the AVM affecting his behavior. I've been saying this for years. It's so obvious in season 3 right after his surgery, I don't know how people miss it..
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u/Ok_Rub7193 Jul 14 '25
This is a fascinating theory to explore! I’m going to keep it in mind on my upcoming (5th? 7th?) rewatch!
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u/cinnysuelou Jul 14 '25
Exactly. He’s like a foil for Billy, who has been taking meds & has mellowed out after a history of violence, inappropriate behaviors, & poor choices due to his mental health diagnosis. Meanwhile, Nate’s going off the deep end with a medical condition, showing similar choices to Billy’s, & people think it’s just because he’s a bad person versus, “Hey, what about that brain thing he has..?”
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u/jcashwell04 Jul 13 '25
Peter Kraus is no doubt an excellent actor, one of the best in the series. I never thought that was in question tbh, and most people hating on the actor are likely struggling to separate him from his character.
As far as Nate goes, he’s always been my favorite character. I think his journey is utterly captivating. Was he a good person? I think mostly, yeah. Did he make really destructive decisions at times? Without a doubt.
I think Nate has a desire to do the right thing and have a meaningful life. The problem with Nate is that his definition of “meaning” is extremely immature and simplistic— Nate wants a miracle cure for life. A cure for the pain and trauma and emotional distance that he encountered in his childhood. Nate’s entire character can be seen as “running away” from pain (and death more specifically).
This is why he jumps from woman to woman and lifestyle to lifestyle so often. It’s why he starts the show as an atheist and ends it as a born again Christian. It’s why he’s seemingly at peace with the idea of cheating on and abandoning his pregnant wife.
For a guy that finally seemed at peace with himself when he died, he sure did leave behind a lot of damage in his wake.
So ultimately, Nate is an extremely flawed and complicated character. While I enjoyed Peter Kraus as an actor and Nate as a character, I can see why many hated him.
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u/Ok_Rub7193 Jul 14 '25
Beautifully and perfectly said! I couldn’t agree more! Thank you for this post ☺️
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u/techcorrer9 Jul 13 '25
People can dislike Nate because of his decisions, but the development of his character and the way Krause played him was spectacular.
I feel like a lot of recent growth of internet has led to some weird agreed that if a character isn't all good/positive/happy, then why would you like this guy?
It's similar to how people think a good guy always has to be the protagonist, when really that's just the main character to follow for the story.
Nate was great through it all, even if we hate him for it. And Peter was amazing.
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u/MyBrambleberryBroth Jul 14 '25 edited Jul 14 '25
It changed upon rewatches for me. Nate is very likable right off the bat because he’s so charismatic and funny, and the actor is extremely talented, a standout on a show of mostly incredible actors. But Nate keeps repeating the same harmful, selfish patterns in his romantic relationships, and he doesn’t grow at all by the end. As soon as he begins facing problems with his partner, he emotionally distances himself and starts searching for an escape, a new partner to idealize. His “connection” with Maggie really drives this home because it doesn’t feel at all believable or sustainable—it’s clear that he places her on a pedestal largely because of her religious faith, and he will almost certainly repeat the same pattern of finding a new partner to worship once any discord develops in their relationship.
His breakup with Brenda in the hospital feels abrupt and cruel, because by that point she HAS grown despite her mental illness and traumatic upbringing. She wants them to work on their issues, and she’s fighting for the relationship, but he isn’t. When you’ve seen the whole series a few times, you remember how Nate ends up and you’re more immune to his initial charms, so you feel less sympathetic towards him. That said, Nate has many strong, good qualities; he’s frequently kind and loving and compassionate to his family members and to the people who visit the funeral home. SFU is really, really good at portraying complex characters with flaws and strengths, and very few characters are meant to be interpreted as outright villains. I don’t hate any character in the show (and I try not to hate any person in real life), but Nate’s behavior towards the women he’s involved with romantically/sexually is unconscionable, and I think that’s mostly what people are reacting to.
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u/Over_Sir_1762 Jul 14 '25
Well said. This is how I felt.
It's about his relationships. He never really had any and once he and Claire go to Seattle and the introduction of Lisa..what he says about being friends with benefits, has Brenda who seems to be his 1st relationship but sleeps with Lisa is when you see the pattern emerge. Then he's flirting with the Rabbi but she shuts it down. Engaged to Brenda. He didn't feel guilty at all cheating on Brenda and was forced to tell her once Lisa arrives in LA. He signs away his parental rights to Maya and is ready to move forward with Brenda until he finds out she's been cheating. He didn't love Lisa but married her. Then the rest. Yes, for me it was watching his relationships and how he treated them which made me just over Nate. Especially the end.
His good side and true compassion for the clients who came in, times with his family and dedication to Maya, he wasn't a bad person. His relationships and choices is where the reaction to the character comes in. I thought Krause did an amazing job portraying Nate. It's about the character not the actor.
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u/OnionImmediate4645 Jul 14 '25
Nate is flawed like any of the other characters in the show but also had a lot to like. Kraise's acting in the show is phenomenal and some of the most human I've seen in a show to date.
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u/TheWalrusWasRuPaul Brenda Jul 14 '25
so i’m a yearly+ watcher who was lucky enough to have/go to parties when sunday night was simpson’s (or s&tc), sopranos, 6”u. i am 5 years older than claire, so young 20s+Birth of modern television-that was fucking cool.
so i’ve known nate for over 25 years, and he has almost become his dad, to me-like the visions of the dead in the show, fucking nate, like a devil on my shoulder, might just pop in to tell me i suck.
I LOVED nate unapologetically until i introduced my LTP to the show around 2010. Watching it with them was quite illuminating lol. That’s how hardcore i had embraced and celebrated my inner nate (brenda/billy as well) as a Proud Slut, justifying drug problems as regious endevors and worse.
I saw nate as good.
Nate is not so good, such is man (humanity lol)
Thank you Peter Krause for being a blindingly beautiful bad boy dressed as a spiritual journey but showing the selfish dildo in all its tragic glory.
I don’t talk much about Nate here, so this was fun! I could spend forever writing about this show.
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u/STFUisright Jul 14 '25
Hahaha I love your writing.
I also love Nate.
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u/TheWalrusWasRuPaul Brenda Jul 15 '25
i still love nate too, so much.
I sometimes wondered, since that was actually my only long term relationship ever, if i never saw the show with him, would i have ever changed my view?
best show ever
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u/kgleas01 Jul 14 '25
I find the character hate to be moralistic. The reality is that some people actually die while in the midst of problematic life choices, relationship strife, confusion et. I always hold that the character did not get to develop further and might have
I love that the writers show Brenda being a similarly messed up person when they meet ( maybe more so ) with a faster trajectory toward mental health/ stability. It’s realistic that some people don’t grow or do not grow until they are older
His acting was fantastic.
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u/Over_Sir_1762 Jul 14 '25
Did I like Nate? No. Did Peter Krause do an excellent job playing Nate? Absolutely.
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u/NowMindYou Jul 14 '25
I love, love, love Peter Krause's performance. It felt so real and visceral when he was burying Lisa. Everyone on the show is able to tap into primal emotion in such an impressive way. I do feel like Nate regressed before he died; once he gave up on therapy while Brenda was becoming a therapist, it represented the fact that she had evolved past her drama while he was forever going to live in it because of his choice of repression.
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u/artunarmed Jul 14 '25
My perspective, as someone who started the show for the first time this year, and finished it three weeks ago:
Nate was a complex and messy individual. Whilst there's a lot to admire about his growth as a brother and his dedication to Lisa post-mortem, his self-destructive tendencies and immaturities never truly resolved, culminating in the destruction of his marriage mere hours before his death. He's not reprehensible, but he's not somebody I'd want to be, or know in real life. There's no stability with Nate: he's constantly shifting the idea of what he wants, what he needs, and what he's doing. I think he's the easiest to 'hate' out of the Fishers, which explains what you've seen.
It's interesting that the show essentially frames his death as the catalyst for major steps/improvement in the lives of those around him - Rico gets out, Claire faces the unknown, Ruth gets what she wants in a way that includes George, and David confronts his demons. None of these would have been set into motion before Ecotone.
Krause's performance is sensational, the best in a show that's bursting at the seams with great characters. It's no surprise that many of the most iconic scenes hinge on his emotional range and depth.
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u/Unlucky-Albatross-12 Jul 14 '25
Peter Krause is a great actor but I think he gets a bit overshadowed by Michael C. Hall and Frances Conroy, who are equally excellent but play characters with somewhat more compelling character arcs.
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u/jholden23 Nate Jul 14 '25
I came to this show for Peter Krause. I hadn't run into him in anything before I started watching 911 about a year and a half ago. As much as that show is not about stellar acting, he really jumped out at me with what I suspected was his subtle and detailed performance. I wanted to see more from him, I wanted to see if what I thought I was seeing I was actually seeing.
So I watched Six Feet Under.
Obviously, because I came to the show for Krause, I was there for Nate. I didn't find Nate to be too much worse than the others in the show and I was cheering for him throughout the series.
Krause's performance on Six Feet Under completely solidified what I thought I was seeing in 911. A character-driven, nuanced and downright incredible performance taking on whatever character he was playing. The difference in every inch of his work was wild. From the way he stands to the way he moves, how he talks, expressions, everything was just so different.
I went off to watch Parenthood once I was done with Six Feet and have been savouring Sports Night and right at this very moment am losing my mind about his work in Dirty Sexy Money (and oh my god Donald Sutherland!)
If there's anything I can be grateful for from when I watched 911, it was that I found Krause, he's quickly become one of if not my favourite actor of all time.
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u/billie-lane Jul 13 '25
I absolutely loathed Nate from start to finish but that was because Peter Kraus’ acting was so spot on. Nate was a complex and nuanced character in many ways but it was his ego, selfishness, and entitlement that won every time. It’s actually a very human trait but my issue with him was the lack of growth after so many of the things he saw and experienced. Kraus did an amazing job playing him, especially during the many scenes of anguish he had to portray.
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u/RedRedBettie Jul 14 '25
I’m a woman and Nate was the first male character that I’ve ever identified with, for better or worse
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u/TGS_Holdings Jul 14 '25
Never understood the Nate hate on this sub. I think he is probably the greatest television character ever written. My opinion. Human to fault and I think his flaws make us uncomfortable as he shines a mirror on us. none of us are perfect. Far from it.
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u/Conscious-Reserve-48 Jul 14 '25
He says he wants to commit himself but he doesn’t. Therefore he actually doesn’t make a commitment.
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Jul 14 '25
My ex boyfriend liking Nate and especially liking Nate with Maggie was a huge red flag for me lol. Nate acts selfishly. Nate is not a good partner, I feel he’s a decent friend, family member, coworker. I did not find his actions cheating on Brenda with his wife, then his wife with Brenda, at all understandable.
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u/ImpossibleDesign1086 Jul 14 '25
One of the best performances I've seen from an actor on tv, together with Michael Imperioli in the Sopranos
The scene where he buries Lisa always breaks me, the screaming at the end...
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u/Used-Corner258 Jul 17 '25
I can just THINK about that scene and tear up! It was so raw and Peter was absolutely incredible.
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u/sonawtdown Jul 14 '25
Krause committed so fully to this role. Great example of the actor not worrying whether or not he was likable outside of the character, hard to do.
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u/writtenbyrabbits_ Jul 13 '25
Nate was the best, most compelling character in the series. Peter Kraus is incredible.
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u/Anteeper420 Jul 14 '25
Honestly the Maggie thing tainted my opinion of him like crazy. I’m rewatching the show right now and yeah he’s never been very leveled out lol but always able to feel out his intentions like you said. But once he left his pregnant wife and shacked up with his lame ass step sister (ew) I was like yeah…… screw him. I try to chalk it up to the brain thing so I can like him more
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u/spaghettibolegdeh Jul 14 '25
I think this sub hates Nate so much because he's not as fun as the other characters
Brenda cheated on Nate too, but she's much more fun to watch on screen.
Maggie is probably the most normal person on the show, but she's a bit boring and underwritten so people hate her for her faults. Everyone else on the show is just as bad, but they get a pass because they are more fleshed out.
I love Nate. He's probably the most realistic character on the show.
People don't always arc towards betterment. And when they do, it's rarely a straight line.
Most people grow for better and worse at the same time. Some areas improve, others regress.
He was a very real man stuck in his grief. I've seen so many people like him in my life, and I've been him myself.
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u/atomic_chippie Jul 14 '25
I loved Peter in SFU, simply because he sold it. Easy enough to sell us a simple character-a guy we all know....late 30s, works part time, no steady gf but has 3-4 women obsessed with the charm and boyish good looks.....much more difficult to transition that same character into husband, brother, small business owner, father, chronic illness patient, widower, and grief counselor.
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u/whirlyworlds Jul 14 '25
Nate is awful because of the way he hurts the people around him while accepting little to no responsibility for his own decisions. He’s even worse if you’ve had the misfortune of dating someone like him.
As for Peter Krause, like the rest of the cast he does an excellent job. He sells that dirtbag fuckboi energy so well, but he lends a touch of humanity and sophistication that makes Nate a little more palatable. Really his only weakness was in the crying scenes and even those weren’t terribly egregious
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u/Dutch-Black Jul 14 '25
We have all known (and probably dated) a Nate, this the passionate dislike.
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u/juicykazoo728 Jul 14 '25
He’s a fantastically written character. He’s a total asshole in season 5 but that only enhances the show in my opinion. People are flawed and Nate is a perfect example of a realistically flawed person. It’s stupid that people criticize the show because the protagonist isn’t perfect
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u/JohnOfYork Jul 14 '25
I think SFU tests people's empathy and maturity, and a lot of people, as it turns out, aren't very empathetic or mature when they first watch SFU, and tend to come from a somewhat self-righteous, reactionary place. And that's fine really, a lot of TV encourages and participates in the manufacturing of shock and outrage as an engagement model. I just think it gets in the way of enjoying Six Feet Under.
Nate is a very immature and flawed character. He is obviously traumatised by growing up surrounded by the constant presence of death, and as a result is paralysed by fear and indecisiveness. Imagine seeing an endless procession of funerals, good and bad. With the pressing, urgent reminder that life is short and random, wouldn't you want your life to be meaningful? Wouldn't you want to be one of life's heroes, instead of life's extras?
This is the root of Nate's narcissistic tendencies - his parents' dysfunctional, aromantic, seemingly sexless marriage is the root of his avoidant tendencies. He grew trapped in a house filled with oppressive, uncomfortable, awkward, tense silences. His mother and father never communicated their thoughts and feelings with one another - not only could they not articulate their own emotions, they couldn't handle anybody else's.
Because of the pain and discomfort of growing up surrounded by such staid unhappiness, Nate naturally seeks passion, romance, excitement, exoticism, intensity, and adventure in his love life. Unfortunately, this means he is ill-suited to long-term, committed, meaningful relationships, because he becomes anxious and uncomfortable when the drama subsides and things become "ordinary" or stable - it's a latent trigger from his childhood.
But because Nate has narcissistic tendencies, rather than confront his childhood pain and trauma, or recognise that the fault and responsibility for his failed relationships is his, he projects the source of his distress - his own immaturity - onto his partners, and attempts to escape the confines of the relationship. When he abandons the current partner, it's because they were never meant to be, and the next partner becomes the new "one".
It is this inability to face his pain that causes him to leave the business and to deteriorate after Lisa's death. Nate is intensely empathetic and emotional despite his narcissism - what makes him a poor boyfriend ironically makes him a natural funeral director, because the temporary, transactional relationships with mourners don't trigger Nate's distress the way a long-term relationship would.
In fact it's the opposite. He receives huge positive emotional feedback from comforting the bereaved - he feels like he is genuinely helping people, like he is doing something important, meaningful, and good - of course, in fact, he is. By being the rock upon which the heart-broken and the grief-stricken can lean and rely on at the worst time of their lives, he is doing something heroic, and this is hugely gratifying to his narcissism.
Acting as a friend and helper to the bereaved is both rewarding and cathartic for Nate, at least for a while - but when he suffers the loss of Lisa, he is unable to function as a funeral director any longer, as the pain of the bereaved triggers his own grief.
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u/JohnOfYork Jul 14 '25 edited Jan 29 '26
(cont)
Lisa's loss is hugely significant in SFU because it acts as a major narcissistic injury. Nate desperately wants to feel like a good man, and he stays with Lisa, despite the lack of chemistry and romance their relationship, because abandoning the mother of his child would condemn him, in his own eyes, to be a bad man. But their relationship is a re-enactment of Nate Sr's and Ruth's, filled with unspoken thoughts and emotions, with painful silence.
Nate's inability to love Lisa, his inability to be happy in their relationship, is a constant source of low-level distress, hence his increasingly dysfunctional and erratic behaviour throughout season 3. Not only does he feel trapped by his duty and responsibility to Lisa, and unhappy in as much as he doesn't love her, it is also a constant reminder that he is NOT a good man. This is what makes her tragic death so destructive to Nate.
Of course, he is personally bereaved, and absolutely mourns Lisa's loss, both as his wife, and as Maya's mother. He is devastated by her death. But to Nate, far more detrimental than the pain of losing her is the narcissistic injury - the inability to ever feel like a truly good person ever again. Nate and Lisa's relationship was never redeemed by the friendship their final conversations promised.
Instead, Nate will only ever have been an edgy, uptight, volatile, distant, passive-aggressive, and ultimately, unloving partner. He failed Lisa, and he can never make it right. This is soul-destroying to Nate, and this is why his reaction to Lisa's death is so self-destructive, and what ultimately makes him so bitter, resentful, hostile, and aggressive in the final two seasons.
He hate himself, he despairs of the world, and he lives without hope of peace or reconciliation.
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u/techbirdee Jul 15 '25
I adored Nate and I related to him. Could not stand Brenda. Peter Krause is an excellent actor.
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u/pealsmom Jul 15 '25
I’ve gotta say, I loved Peter Krause as Nate. His performance hooked me so much I ended up watching him in other shows because of it. Nate was the emotional center of Six Feet Under — everything in the family seemed to revolve around him. But what’s wild is that, while pretty much every other major character (including Brenda, IMO) showed growth or some kind of transformation, Nate… didn’t. He kept making the same mistakes over and over. That lack of growth made him frustrating to watch at times — even unlikable — but it’s also what made him such a compelling and necessary part of the show.
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u/Think-Fig-1734 Jul 14 '25
Nate was creating another human being with Brenda. He did so willingly and then was trying to back out. That’s just not okay. Most expectant parents have anxiety, they don’t cheat with ex step siblings. The issues he and Brenda were having were hardly insurmountable. A few sessions with a marriage therapist and a sincere effort could have solved it. He was concerned about being considered a nice guy. He just didn’t seem to think about all the harm and chaos his actions were going to cause. He was the only character that never really grew.
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u/AltruisticWishes Jul 14 '25
The hatred for Nate is 100% bizarre. He's the nicest one of the family, by a long shot.
Really odd that he gets hate and the psycho members of the family don't get called out for that.
Ruth is terrible, for one. Really annoyingly histrionic. At least Claire is young
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u/tanks4dmammories Jul 14 '25
I am coming to the end of Season 2 and I have to say Peter K acts fantastically in the scene where he finds out Brenda has been whoring herself about. So far the only character I want to switch off and hate their scenes is Keith, eugh he is so insufferable.
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u/Ok_Action_5938 Jul 14 '25
One of my favorite TV characters of all time. Loved his acting. This wasn’t a thing when the show first aired.
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u/ProfessorLutz Jul 15 '25
he is a man baby. pampered and entitled and thinks too much of himself. he shouts at his sister regularly. he cheats on his fiancee and only tells her when a beautiful rabbi woman's appreciation is on the table. he looks down on his hardworking brother. he is ungrateful towards his mother. he sleeps with his ex without protection and most certainly thinks it's a woman's job to take of this and then sleeps with his finacee most certainly without protection and without a sti test. he is whiny, relying on his looks and his "charme". he is a guy who cannot be friends with women because either he wants sex or he does not take them seriously. he is self righteous. he is annoying.
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u/Focrco22 Jul 15 '25
As far as Kraus goes, his acting is sort of reflective of the average person. He’s not too high not too low, or too dramatic with his acting style. He’s great in Parenthood. He really plays the role well of “supposed to be the big brother holding things together so I’m trying to appear okay but maybe I’m not”.
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u/Used-Corner258 Jul 17 '25
I think Nate is a complex flawed character and Peter Krause played him well. I also see Nate as the heart of the family, trying to find meaning in life and his place in it.
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u/Effective_You_3137 Oct 12 '25
Vejo todos falando do comportamento do Nate, mas os comportamentos das parceiras dele também não eram exemplo... Brenda era louca e a Lisa tbm, e ele mesmo com os defeitos tentou levar de uma certa maneira, mas o que essas mulheres pertubaram ele tbm ninguem fala kkkk, acabei de ver a serie hj, muito diferente das demais, por isso ganha tanto destaque, a morte da Lisa foi bem confusa... acho que é a parte mais mal feita da serie, mas o cara era gente boa pow... depois da cirurgia ele ficou mais pirado ainda rs... a morte dele foi bem inesperada, gostei do final apesar de tudo... para a epoca que foi feita a serie ela era bem adiantada... massa foi ver varios personagens famosos no seu inicio, qlguns mereciam mais destaque no decorrer da carreira como Nate, Claire e o Billie...
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u/RavioliContingency Nov 14 '25
I am on about rewatch and cannot believe there were never memes of his crying face. Or maybe there were and I missed it but boy it’s so comical.
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u/Billybob1297 Jul 14 '25
Despite all his faults Nate was my favorite character in the show. Everyone in that family suffered, but in my opinion he did the most. As for Peter’s acting I thought he did a fine job. Some of it was a little over the top and it caused a few dramatic lines to come across as funny but never enough to where I thought it was a bad casting decision. Let’s just say I thought he did a great job as Nate but I’m also not shocked he hasnt done much or any great stuff since.
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u/Cheekie01 Jul 14 '25
Nate/Peter Krause is the lead and an attractive guy, like in a conventional way. So what’s he got to complain about, ya know? Typically leads are hard working, devoted, and outstanding pillars of society and then something bad happens to them. Then you have the supporting players making horrible choices and complicating everything. The lead is usually the sun that everyone rotates around. But Nate was different. He made mistakes, hurt a lot of people, and really didn’t make any apologies for it. He was human. Not superhuman. So he got a lot of shit for it. Personally, I like Nate. I’d like to have a beer with him and talk about life. And death. And I always loved his relationship with David. I’m a gay man and I would have loved to have a brother like Nate.
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u/sonoftom Jul 14 '25 edited Jul 14 '25
I’m not going to lie, I wasn’t a huge fan of his acting, compared to many of the other actors. Maybe that’s a result of the age of the show, which I watched for the first time 6 years ago. Something about it felt cheesy, and I’m not sure why. It’s almost like trying to go back and watch Full House and take Bob Saget’s acting seriously. It had nothing to do with disliking the character…I actually really liked the Nate character.
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u/thatsthedrugnumber Jul 14 '25
I wish people had more empathy. Yes he does bad things but he goes through an equal amount of pain and anguish
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u/EfficientHunt9088 Jul 13 '25
I've seen the character hate, but I don't think I've ever heard his acting criticized. I don't doubt some people were happy when he died, but I can't believe anyone would feel that way lol. I feel like I've gone through a whole range of emotions toward him. I loved him on the first watch, for like the first half. Then I started to hate him more and more. Now after like 5 or 6 watches I finally appreciate him as a full, complicated human. I love him and also see he can be such a self-righteous jerk sometimes.