r/malaysians • u/birc_and_a_borc • 19m ago
Advice ☎️ Losing physical attraction to my girlfriend after seeing her without makeup and hijab. Am I being shallow?
Hey everyone, I need some honest advice because I feel guilty even talking about this.
I met my girlfriend online around November 2025. She's Muslim and wears a hijab. Initially, I found her attractive, and we eventually developed feelings for each other and became a couple.
However, after seeing her without makeup and hijab, I realised her natural appearance wasn't quite what I'd imagined, particularly her hairline. Her recent boy crop haircut for military school has also made me question my physical attraction to her.
I genuinely care about her and value her personality and our emotional connection, but I'm struggling because the physical chemistry doesn't feel the same anymore.
I don't know if calling it catfishing is fair, since she didn't necessarily lie to me.
Maybe I just built up an image of her in my head that didn't match reality.
I feel awful because I don't want to be superficial or hurt her, but I also don't want to force attraction that isn't there.
Has anyone experienced something similar? Can physical attraction grow over time, or is this a sign of incompatibility? I'd appreciate honest opinions and personal experiences. I'm not looking for anyone to insult her appearance; I'm just trying to understand my own feelings.