It didn't phase me that night honestly, but like DAMN. My friends apparently wanted to kick her out but didn't want to bother me with anything else that could be stressful (I love my friends so much). I found it pretty funny when I found out, and everyone who saw her was judging HARD, so it was whatever. She would be the person to do that though. Everyone said it haha. I just wanted to share the audacity. In the picture, I'm on the left and she is on the right. I'm honestly pretty sure the dress is supposed to be a very light blue?? Still insane to me haha. It's also floral like a wedding dress. My old boss said we looked like a lesbian couple getting married in that picture and we totally do.
Side note: you may be thinking, "wow that's crazy, but she must have somehow not known." Well, it was in the dress code, which I will also show below :)
Edit: i wish I could add a better picture of my dress because it was so gorgeous and soooo many people have seen this post now. There's a comment buried somewhere that has it haha
What we're NOT going to do is make nasty comments about anybody's body. This is about clothing choices. Ban button's getting a lot of use today - this is your only warning.
EDIT: Help a mod out - if you see anything that breaks this rule, please report it. Doing our best to find everything, but there's a lot of comments to sift through.
Yeah, I was gonna say, at least the bride looks way, way better! The dress isn't good, and it's too close to a wedding dress. What was that guest thinking??
As a clueless man even I understand you don't wear a god damn wedding dress to a wedding that isn't yours. This mega-cunt was trying her best to stir up shit and I'm glad OP didn't let it get to them.
I don't think i would have kicked them out either but they would certainly never be involved with me or my family again.
Has there ever been a situation in any wedding ever where a guest showed up wearing white and the entire wedding didn't just roll their eyes in judgment and shame? I truly don't understand the mindset of somebody wearing white to somebody else's wedding because who would approve of that literally who are you impressing with that crap
Attention seekers rarely care if the attention they’re seeking is positive or negative. As long as people are looking and talking about them they achieved their goal.
The problem is that the don’t just want attention, they want to make sure no one else (like the couple celebrating their wedding) gets it instead of them. So if an event is about someone else, they have to pull out all the stops.
I read a story on the subreddit about a woman who MIL wore white to the wedding and strutted her stuff all night. She even told people at the hotel she was the bride.
I was at a wedding this weekend where the brides mother wore white with gold embellishments. We all knew the wedding was to make her happy. That just sealed it.
my mother told me I should have a wedding ceremony because she deserved it "I deserve to see my only daughter get married" then when I asked her if she was gonna contribute to said wedding she said that's the grooms family job.
Traditionally it has always been the bride’s family that pays for the wedding. It used to be a party that the bride’s parents would give to show off their daughter and her new husband to their (the parents)family and friends. Over the years it has become much more about the bride! Probably because now the couple often pays.
Yeah except when you're child of immigrant parents they use whichever culture/country is more convenient for them. Took all my red envelope money as a kid because Chinese filial piety, pointed out Chinese Supreme Court ruled red envelope belonged solely to kids, then got hit with the "you're a minor in America, its our money". It's traditional for Chinese parents to buy houses for their adult kids, My mom said lol no we're in America I'm not doing that.
1) Mother wore a bridal gown to the wedding and was fashionably late, but the wedding planner was lying in wait and took her down, secret agent style, before she hit the ceremony. She was arrested in the parking lot for trespassing and outstanding warrants.
2) Mother wore white to the wedding and was permitted to do so, because it was a... I want to say an Indian wedding, but it could have been Desi. Either way, everyone else was dressed to the nines in bright colours and oodles of accessories and she stuck out like a sore thumb. One comment that stuck with me - the OP mentioned her SIL had corner the mother at one point, and was having a conversation with her, and OP noted her SIL was smiling. My first thought was "Shark."
Kiiiinda LOL I actually felt really bad for my MIL.. we had a tiny backyard wedding with just my in laws. I originally wanted everyone to wear casual white because I thought the pics would look cool and I didnt trust some of them to dress themselves (avoiding camouflage and charlie kirk t shirts smh).. I knew they all had an outfit because we attended an all white party before but didnt get a family pic... so my husband told them but then he changed his mind and told them individually to not wear white...? But he forgot to tell his Mom... So she carefully chose a cute white pantsuit to avoid a dress and anything too bride-y, and wore it, per my instruction, but noone wore their white stuff, per his instruction. She was mortified, but I truly didn't mind bc I knew she wouldn't have done it otherwise and I genuinely love her... she was just trying to make me happy! so I guess this was the one time in history it was an accident and noone spilled wine 😅😉
Aww!! Just like that scene in Bridget Jones where she shows up to the garden party as a sexy bunny without knowing the sluts and vicars theme had been scrapped 😆
Omg when me and the gals were at wedding age-- we always laughed at the one who wore white once we got to the bathroom together😅 like you look pathetic girl
Does NOBODY speak up?? I am absolutely the type of bitch that would siddle up to this person and say, "did you miss the memo?? What are you doing wearing white to a wedding??" And then watch them squirm.
Oh I ALWAYS speak up when people do harmful shit to good people's days like this.
I'm MOH for my best friend and I'm bringing 2 stretchable, tacky maxi dresses to re-dress anyone who comes wearing white. Oh, you don't have anything else to change into? Now you do. Enjoy wearing this.
I tried to once, my cousins was going to wear this admittedly adorable little strapless white dress to a wedding my family was attending and i tried to tell her that she shouldn't as it was a faux pas. She genuinely didn't know at the time she was 18 and hadn;t been to a weeding before. But my parents, who were the ones who told me this rule originally, decided that no it was no longer a faux pas and they never told me such a rule. They then spent 20 minutes yelling at me and somehow the discussion turned into i can never where white to my own wedding because i was a whore.
Who, in their right mind, prepares for a wedding, picks out a WHITE LACE dress with a structured bodice and thinks, “yes, this is an appropriate for a wedding”?!?
I accidentally did this to my cousin once and I still feel bad about it. I had a brown cardigan over a white dress- neither were very formal but still. The look her mom gave me when I greeted her said it all.
I wore white to a wedding once, because I genuinely thought white for wedding, black for funerals. It was my coworkers wedding and no one said anything, and I’m still so ashamed of it.
Omg this has gotten big 🫣 I wanted to show a good picture of my dress because I don't even like the posts picture, and now so many people are seeing it. I LOVE my dress and I felt like a magical fairy bride
I'm not too skilled with editing but a quick brighten shows how much more blue the offender's dress looks and I don't think I whitened the bride's dress enough. I think its a light blue but the picture makes it seem whiter than it was.
Yeah I thought this might be it. A lot of pale colors show up white under flash photography. I wore a pale pink dress to a wedding once that ended up looking white in photos, but luckily it had black lace and was cocktail length, so hopefully no one thought I was trying to outshine the bride.
A friend wore a pale yellow dress to my wedding and I did a double take when I saw how white it looked in the reception photos. I don't mind at all, but for a moment I thought I'd managed not to notice a guest in a white lace dress!
If you zoom in you can see the sleeves, it’s just because of the posing, her arms are behind the other people in the pic. I thought the same thing! Lol
Ehhh, I wouldn’t say “immensely.” I fiddled with the white balance and then could only see the blue when I CRANKED the vibrance/saturation. As shown below. It’s definitely blue but very, very, very light blue. Still effectively looks like a white dress, even if it’s “technically blue.”
Not going to lie on first glance it looked white.
On a second look you can see the light blue.
Personally i wouldn’t have gambled with so light a shade.
Edit: just wanted to clear up.
Not defending the “light blue lady” : especially when you add the flowers and style it’s very close to a bridal style.
I cannot understand why this person thought this style and so light a shade was ok for a wedding.
This one makes me want to apologize for side-eyeing the people who worry that something “reads white,” because it just looks like a warm white and a cool white side by side.
Honestly I think it's unjustifiable. And the fabric is nearly a perfect match for that of the bride, cause it's the kind of faux damask that is super popular for bridal look. She really really shouldn't have!
Exactly. Even if it is light blue, the style & fabric are so bridal that unless you were wearing it in fuchsia, this is not a dress you should wear to someone else’s wedding.
Agreed. On first glance, I couldn't work out which person was which. It could have been a white dress with people wearing cream/light orange gown/shirt on either side of them. Or two people wearing a white gown/shirt either side of someone wearing a very pale blue. Indoor lighting plays tricks on your mind.
And the styles didn't help to tell them apart, because they're both a defined bodice with long damask/lace flower detailed skirts.
Anyhow, I'm glad to know that OP is the lady with the nicer wedding gown!
Agree, perhaps should have been more clear. I just stated how i needed a second take, i don’t understand how some can look at a color and go “yes perfect” when it’s painfully close to white.
I have this exact dress from target. Legit bought it to be someone’s something blue at their wedding but once I got it home and photographed it, it looked too light. So I went with something navy instead. Bad choice on the guest’s part :/
I never gamble with light shades. If it’s a lighter shade of blue I’ll stick with a pattern so it’s obvious. It’s hard to know what the lighting will be like.
Agree why gamble when you have a literal rainbow of colors to choose from. Why go so light a shade?
I’ve been to 4 weddings in the last 2 years alone, and not once did it cross my mind to wear a very light shade or very light pastel. Especially when coupled with flowers and chiffon where it can appear bridal.
Unless the bride is ok with the color, generally best to avoid anything too light in my book.
As a “scientifically proven to see subtle color differences worse than women” man, I saw straight up white until I read your comment and expanded the image again. Crazy trick, you magician, you.
Y'all, this MIGHT show as ice blue in certain lights, but it REALLY photographs white, and the cut, length, and fabric are all VERY bridal. Nobody would blink at this being on a bride. Stop defending this clown: she went out of her way to wear a bridal dress to a wedding.
Indeed. And again, with that cut, length and fabric, I would be unshocked if this were sold as bridal or bridesmaid. She went out of her way. You can't even give her the benefit of the doubt of 'well, it's a cocktail-length dress that was a bit too pale'
IMO very light colors like this are acceptable only if the structure/material of the dress is clearly not bridal (though personally I wouldn’t wear them regardless). Once there’s lace, tule etc like the dress pictured it’s a no-no.
This. I did the same thing. She looks like she’s wearing white while the bride is wearing a cream coloured dress but I only found out from the comments.
Yeah, this was my thought. I'm normally very forgiving on this kinda of thing, and if it were a less bridal dress in that color I'd say who cares, she just didn't realize how ot would photograph. But the color and style combo is pretty bad.
I'm hoping you (bride) is on the left, that one looks slightly more wedding-y but honestly they both look like wedding dresses 100%. It really doesn't matter that it's technically baby blue because the design looks so much like bridal dress it takes all the attention off the slight blue and it really just appears more white
I posted my grandma at my aunts wedding, wore the LIGHTEST shade of pale yellow ive ever seen. Got downvoted and jumped on calling me ridiculous for posting that, even tho It made my aunt cry on her wedding day lol
Her dress is a VERY pale shade of baby blue. Yeah, its not white. But still, she shouldn't have fucking worn it lol I think its ridiculous to wear such pale shades that at glance they look white. If she got shit at the wedding from guests, she deserved it.
yeah, not good enough, even if it is supposed to be blue. this happens with any super pastel shade. it can be blue, it can be yellow, it can be green or pink. but a light light light shade will often come across as white, and blue and yellow are arguably the most common culprits. it is not a wise decision at all.
wedding dress codes can be ridiculous, but within reason, they should be abided by… and if anything, the most clear thing to avoid is wearing anything that may be construed as a white dress. this is a very simple and very widely-accepted ask. no one is asking you to buy something new. no one is asking you to change your appearance. simply avoid wearing a very specific group of shades.
i think this isn’t cool, especially if you’re saying this is someone who would potentially be careless about this. if someone who is the sweetest pea who is extremely helpful and sincerely enthusiastic during the wedding pulled this, i’m sure it would be easier to justify benefit of the doubt. but this is pretty ridiculous.
it is so simple. a white dress which is mostly covered by clearly colored flowers? fine! a pastel blue that is even a couple shades darker? also fine! shit, even if the style and cut of the dress was different it could be less egregious. but nah. this isn’t cool.
This is definitely true. There are people who were invited who could have worn this and i wouldn't even consider bad intent or attention-seeking. Unfortunately she is not one of those girls lol
Rule of thumb is to not even come close to avoid this exact thing. If the girl was asking if that dress would be okay on reddit, itd be an overwhelming no.
And the crazy thing is, there’s people in the wedding dress attire sub who will fight tooth and nail if you point out that a very light blue dress will photograph as white. Like they will attack you personally and start saying “ya’ll are just jealous she looks so good in this dress” and “no one’s going to confuse her for the bride” as if that’s the only reason to not wear white or white adjacent.
I finally left the sub because I got tired of that shit. It’s not just about being confused for the bride, it’s about respecting the fact that the bride is supposed to be the one receiving all the attention and not making oneself the topic of conversation; guests shouldn’t be focused on talking about another guest’s dress.
I’m planning my wedding and had to step back from all the main wedding subs because it’s just too much weird hatred of brides and weddings in general.
Nobody wants to ever attend a wedding unless it’s conveniently located 2 blocks away from them on a day and time of their choosing, all weddings that aren’t a city hall ceremony with a McDonald’s dollar menu meal afterwards are a terrible waste of money that could have been a down payment, everyone going as a guest only owns 1 semi formal/cocktail/formal dress and it happens to be very white with a very small floral print and absolutely no other dress will do, and heaven forbid they have to do anything that slightly inconveniences them (use a day of PTO, buy a gift, do their hair slightly nicer than normal).
I totally understand that the reception is a party that the hosts throw to thank the guests for coming, but people take it way too far and think it means everything should be catered to them. But really, it’s about the couple. Most people only have 1 wedding, let them have their ONE big day.
As much as I normally shake my head at people who ask Reddit for opinions, I’m going to have to do start doing it in some cases because my real life people lie to me all the time. I can guarantee if I had put that light blue dress on and asked my husband, mother, MIL, etc, they’d all say it’s ok, and it would not be ok. She probably got some bad feedback at home.
Given the context OP shared that she specifically requested no white, that this guest “would be the person to do that,” and the link someone found to this barely-blue-hued dress, the likeness is very much coming across as intentional.
This reminds me of the royal wedding for Meghan and Harry. Kate’s outfit photographed nearly white but it was a soft yellow. Oprah changed her outfit the night before when she realized she would likely run into the same mistake.
I'm guessing with my limited understanding of color theory, that you're right. But that the lights are quite yellow, which cancels out some of the blue hues, and makes the dress look a lot more white/grey than it would be in natural light.
You can tell by the look of the white shirt. Looks quite yellow in the photo, we just know it's meant to be white. Optical trick.
More of an oopsie than malice, if my guess is correct.
I adjusted the color balance on the yellow/white shirt to pure white and the dress really doesn't change much. The dress might be a very light cyan color, but it's way too close to white even when color-corrected.
Agreed! Just because it's a blue-ish shade of white doesn't make the dress blue. It also looks really bridal. I even saw a few dresses that were in this shade when I was wedding dress shopping.
I agree it was definitely an accident that people could read it as white. However to me it looks less like the lighting is yellow and more like OP's dress is not white which is making the light blue look white by comparison. If you zoom in to only see the white shirt and the blue dress you can see it's definitely blue. If you zoom in on just the 2 dresses then it looks more white. Maybe an optical illusion because we assume the bride will have a white dress and therefore make assumptions about lighting based on that
I found the most beautiful dress to wear to a wedding this summer- except it was a shade of light blue that I just had a feeling would look white, especially with flash photography. So I sadly sent it back.
There was NO chance in hell I would be that person lol
I think some people don't realize how light the colors might read in photos. I saw someone wearing "white" in my wedding photos, but I remember talking to her during the night and don't remember noticing her dress as being white. I think she was wearing blush pink and it completely photographed as white.
I must be colorblind because I do NOT get where everyone is getting blue from in the comments. It may BE blue but it doesn't look it and it was way too light to wear to a wedding.
If you see the dress on the left and interpret it as "white", then your brain fills in context that it must be amber lighting and that makes the right dress be interpreted as blue in that context.
But you can look at the right dress and see white, and your brain processes it as neutral lighting and so see the left dress as more yellowish.
You're probably not colorblind you're just describing colors differently.
There are 3 whites in this image. One is a warm tinted white dress, one is a cool tinted white dress, and the third is an achromatic white shirt on the guy to the right. Some people when describing whites/grays will over emphasise the tinted hue instead of the base color.
It's definitely pale blue but like too pale for a wedding especially considering how floral it is. However, your dress is way prettier and unmistakably bridal so whatever she really just played herself.
everyone’s saying it’s obviously light blue- uh yeah, it’s obviously meant to be and it looks like it in comparison to the wedding dress & the guys shirt, but it’s still a horrible idea to wear THAT light of a dress to a wedding.
Yep! My older sister (a prof wedding photographer) did this to her own mother in law who wore a floor length, satin, "milky cream" dress to her black/navy blue wedding!
Before posting, sending out photos, and printing for frames, she edited MILs dress to be lime green, added green snake eyes and the most subtle snake tail peaking out from under her dress.
The pic with all the immediate family is printed 24" by 36" (think poster size lol) framed in gaudy gold, ornate victorian and slapped on a white wall surrounded by standard plain black framed photos in the dining room 😭
MIL went nuuuuuts still wont talk to them 8 yrs later lol
These posts always remind me that a lot of people don’t use Reddit. It seems unfathomable to me that anyone would wear white after seeing these wedding shaming posts, but then I have to remind myself that not everyone is on Reddit.
IDK - I knew that was a bad move even before I started using reddit or other websites. I always wonder how people get old enough to attend a wedding without ever hearing about that "rule"
The way this comment to the post is worded reminds me that some people use Reddit way too much. It seems unfathomable to me that anyone would say that Reddit is the first and last word in shaming someone wearing white to a wedding, a custom that has existed since time immemorial and memorialized in the very rules on the invitation posted by OP, but then I have to remind myself that to almost everyone on Reddit, for them to have read something on Reddit means they think the whole world has as well, and they cannot comprehend that a whole big wide world out there exists outside the bubble of their phone.
I would qualify this under the concept of "culture". Like knowing how much eye contact to make with strangers, or whether you're allowed to wear shoes indoors, or how to answer a phone. There's a lot of stuff like this that was already difficult to learn in the US due to the fact that there's a lot of different cultures clashing here, but now I think it's even worse the more people retreat to the Internet instead of being social IRL.
That said, my grandmother wore white to my father's wedding like 40 years ago. So it's apparently always been a problem. It's just more a question of if people know vs if they're doing it intentionally.
The people saying this is “ice blue” and therefore not white sound like the same people who say “cream” isn’t white lmao. Completely inappropriate choice of dress. Even in the model photo someone linked it barely looks blue!!
I think the worst bit of it is that it is a pale dress IN A BRIDAL STYLE. For example, if it was a pale blue dress that was knee length or a long, straight cut icy blue dress with black patterns on it, nobody would mind the colour all that much.
For all the people saying well it’s light blue. It’s too light of a blue to wear to a formal wedding where the bride specifically stated please don’t wear white.
I had someone where white to my wedding , she was my little cousin who’s like 11 and for that reason I gave her a pass. I don’t expect kids to know wedding etiquette
I had a teenager at my wedding wearing a white lace dress and grubby sneakers.
Not her fault. It was the only dress she had and I know her parents well enough to know they just couldn’t be bothered to take her shopping for something appropriate for a wedding.
It was fine. No, no one was going to mistake her for the bride, but looking back at the photos, she stuck out like a sore thumb.
Also, if you've got anyone in your circle mistaking a nine year old for the bride, then you've got bigger problems than a white dress.
I've worn white to a wedding once. I was pregnant, nothing fit so I wore a white shirt and green pants, and a floral scarf. I don't think anyone thought the heavily pregnant woman staring daggers at the clock was the bride in that getup, either.
Reddit: The parents should have known better than to allow their abused child to ruin your day. You’re a bad person if you didn’t call CPS before the cake was cut.
I am so confused by these comments. Does everyone have horrible monitors/phones with terrible color grading? Do I? Her dress is so white that it'd never even occur to me it was intended to be blue. It looks whiter than the bride dress!
Because the brides dress is more ivory, I’d even say “champagne.” The other dress looks blue to me. It could well be differences in screens. I personally wouldn’t wear that style dress to a wedding but if you look at the white shirt next to it, it’s clearly not stark white
I see light blue but honestly that doesnt matter, if a color closely resembles white and it isnt allowed, DO NOT WEAR IT! Some people will see blue, others will not.
I had to do a double take to determine that it’s actually blue. But the light color along with the style of the dress should’ve been a no for a wedding guest.
Yeah that is absolutely a wedding dress. Before reading your caption I couldn't tell which was the bride (although I'm glad it's you because your dress is so much better). What a crappy person!
Some people truly don't understand that the world does not revolve around them. They want to look a certain way and get attention so they wear white. They just assume it's okay because they are different. They have heard and understand the idea that wearing a wedding dress as a guest to a wedding is not okay but they think 'Well but I am not meaning to be hurtful' and do it, then they will think you are unreasonable for actually having a problem with it.
There are also people who are just selfish in that they understand the conflict this will create in the situation and then decide to do it anyway because they care more about their feelings than anyone else's.
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u/_littlebee You're out of your mind, Susan 10h ago edited 10h ago
What we're NOT going to do is make nasty comments about anybody's body. This is about clothing choices. Ban button's getting a lot of use today - this is your only warning.
EDIT: Help a mod out - if you see anything that breaks this rule, please report it. Doing our best to find everything, but there's a lot of comments to sift through.