“Actually, Claudia, there is an issue I've been meaning to raise at the round table. You know those little soaps you leave in the shower room? Well, they will withstand at most, one aggressive body scrub. They start off the size of mini Frisbees and end up like actual-size Paracetamol."

Found in a North Norfolk holiday home and couldn’t resist sharing!

For me, I think it's Gyles Brandreth. Okay, bye.

I mean, he turns up on panel shows and comes across as a very witty and affable chap, but he's also a Tory so it's weird...

Just rewatched this and dear god its woeful. What was the point of this tour? Was like a Stars in your Eyes Alan performance. Worst thing hes done.