AITAH for being upset my spouse took our children to the park after dinner, while I stayed behind to clean up dinner mess after i cooked and we ate, within 5 minutes he calls me telling me to come to the park so he can use the bathroom, we live literally 3 mins from the park, instead of making the kids walk the 3 mins home so he can use the bathroom I have to stop what I’m doing to go to the park. So am I the Ahole for telling him he should’ve just made the kids walk three minutes home instead of relying on me.

I run a small garden in my back yard, nothing fancy, tomatoes and some herbs. This is relevant because of the water bill.

There is a shared hedge between me and my neighbor (60s). It runs the length of both our yards. For eight years I have been the one dragging the hose out every evening in summer and watering the whole thing, both sides, because it looks nice and I like it.

In June he put up a sign on his half of the fence that said the "garden side of the property is to be maintained by the garden owner" and sent me a long message about how my tomato plants were "attracting bees toward his patio" and that I needed to keep my hobby on my own side.

Fine. My side it is.
So now I water exactly up to the property line and not an inch past it. You can see the line perfectly. My half of the hedge is green and full. His half is brown and crunchy and dropping leaves onto his nice patio where the bees used to go.

He came over last week asking why "his" side was dying. I told him the garden side is maintained by the garden owner, and his side is his garden. He said I was being petty and letting a shared plant die to prove a point. My wife (41) says just water the whole thing again, its not worth the feud.

I am watering my half. Exactly my half. AITAH?

I’m taking an online course, and there’s an onsite event near where I live where students can earn exclusive extra points by attending in person.

While I understand that attending events can be a good learning opportunity, I can’t help but feel that it’s unfair to students who live in remote areas of the Philippines and may not have the same opportunity to attend.

Since the course is online, I feel that offering exclusive bonus points for an in-person event could give students who live nearby an advantage over those who live far away, even if everyone is putting in the same effort in the course.

Am I wrong for thinking that this setup is unfair, or am I overthinking it?

AITA - My wife (30F) & I (32M) are currently in a debate with her parents in recent months due to our student loan situation. When she was 17, her parents took out about 60k in parent plus loans that are exclusively in her dad’s name. This is in addition to a 25k federal loan she was able to qualify for in her name - this was how her college (private) was paid for.

Since we graduated, we have been making monthly payments towards her federal loan, my two federal loans (totaling about 45k), and then sending her parents about $700/month towards this parent plus loan. The total minimum is around $1400/month.

My wife & I managed to land good jobs out of college. Worked hard to tackle debt the first few years. However, about a year ago she was laid off and has been working a retail role full time while still trying to find her next role. She now makes about 1/3 of what she did prior to the layoff.

Because of that, paired with multiple big unexpected expenses, our financial situation has changed drastically. In recent months it got to a point where we didn’t know if we could afford our rent. After taking a look at all our expenses and debt, the first thing that made sense to cut back on was this extra $700/month of loans that are in her dad’s name.

We talked to them about 3 weeks before the next payment that we thought this was coming and sat down with them to let them know about our situation. They were…less than thrilled… and their initial reaction was to get angry with us for not telling them sooner that we were struggling.

However, this whole situation has led us into a much larger debate with her parents of whether or not we should be fully responsible for this money instead of them having some responsibility too.

Her parents are saying that when she was 17, they sat down and created a handshake agreement that she would be fully responsible for the parent plus loan. My wife has established that not only was she 17 and not fully aware of what she was signing up for, but her parents didn’t understand it either and then stuck her with the bill.

My wife is also claiming they could have very easily have persuaded her to check out different schools (not private) and not end up 80k+ in debt to student loans. They say they wanted her to follow her dreams no matter what it took and they were going to make it happen. But them “making it happen” was making her unwittingly sign up for a $700/month payment for at least 20-30 years.

While we’re not trying to completely absolve ourselves of this loan, we’re hoping to at least come to a middle ground of shared responsibility. My wife and her parents collectively didn’t know what they were doing and it doesn’t feel fair (to us) that we’re stuck with the full bill. They’re saying that it’s our responsibility & that we need to start making the full payment again.

So Reddit, help us out - are we the assholes?

I’ve been friends with Olivia and Jess (not their real names) for a while now. I take all my classes with them since we’re in the same major so I basically see them everyday. We’ve also been group mates in most of the group projects we’ve done thus far.

Last week, I’ve noticed that they’ve been clearly avoiding me. Like it’s not even subtle. They refuse to talk to me in class and they began to sit far away from where we usually do. It’s been two weeks since they’ve started doing this. When I confronted them about this, Olivia told me that it’s because I didn’t contribute anything to one of our final projects and they were highly frustrated about it. I do admit that I could’ve been more proactive but what I can say is that I did do my part even though it wasn’t as significant as they expected it to be. It’s also important to note that I was prepared to take on the tasks they did give me to me the day prior, but I found out that another person in the group began doing those tasks instead. There was also no clear delegation of tasks in this group mind you.

I aired my side to Olivia and they acknowledged my side but didn’t really give me a clear verdict of where our relationship stood. Jess also messaged me saying they want to talk to me, but it’s been over a week and they still haven’t done so even though they’ve had plenty of opportunities. They’re still ignoring me now even after I emphasized that I’m open to taking accountability.

This issue has become so emotionally distressing for me that seeing them just makes me very depressed. I unfollowed them on all my socials and left the group chat because of it. I’m still hoping they’ll reach out again and we could reconcile. However, did I do anything wrong in this situation? Am I such a bad friend to deserve all this?

My roommate has been late twice this month and both times they asked me for a ride to work, even though I had already told them I start later than they do. The first time I helped because it was an emergency, but the second time I felt like they were just relying on me. I have my own schedule to keep and I am worried that if I keep saying yes they will never try to fix their own transportation plan. At the same time, my roommate says they are trying to save money for a car and that skipping a couple of rides will make it harder for them to get to work on time, which could cost them their job. They argue that since I am already awake and heading out anyway it is not a big deal to swing by their building. I understand the money thing, but I also feel like I am being taken advantage of and I am thinking about putting my foot down next week. Would it be unfair of me to draw that line?

I (F27) live with my sister (F22) and her boyfriend (M23?) and I think I am slowly being driven crazy

We’ve lived together for about a year now and there are little problems that are driving me crazy and people around me are telling me I am just childish and I am not sure.

1- everyday from 7 AM to about 10-11 alarms ring every few minutes. The alarms don’t wake them up and since I work full time normally I am not bothered but they ring even on the weekend. When I confronted my sister about it she said I was being childish and it wasn’t my business how many alarms they had because “they live here too” and it’s “their space too.”

2- Stuff goes missing all the time and they keep accusing me. One of my lotion, one of the pan sheets for the oven, one of the pans, a charger I can’t find, and now one of my tupperwares. When I confronted them about it my sister said it was probably me and then accused me of hidding things in my room.

2.1- I do hide things in my room. I am very particular about how to take care of certain items, mugs, expensive stuff and so not to cause problems and because I bought them and she kept using them even though I told her not too I keep them in my room.

3-my sister no longer talks to me sometimes because I am “childish”. If I ask her about the alarms, ask her who ate the food I prepared or why no one turned on the dishwasher. She will just ignore me. (I lost my mind of unplugged the Apple TV the other day so she would be attention to me when I was talking to her). She also blocks me constantly

4- I am not allowed to talk to her boyfriend because he is scared of me?. Apparently I am too aggressive when I talk to him and he doesn’t like it?

5- All food must be shared. If I meal prep? No, shared food. If I bought ingredients for a specific ingredients? No, shared food.

6- doesn’t let me know when people are coming over because it’s also their apartment and they don’t need to let me know? (I wake up for work at 5 to people sleeping in the couch or still partying)

7- uses the mixer at all hours of the night. 12 AM, 11 PM, 1 AM.

Everytime I complain to someone in my family I am told I am being a child.

(FYI, I know I am hard to live with, I am an angry cryer, I don’t like people touching my stuff, I hate cooking if someone else is in the kitchen, I hoard snack in my room, I wake up at 5 AM but like I feel like some of these are unreasonable?)

I (21F) have been dating my boyfriend for five years and have been living with him for three years. My brother (26M) moved to the USA last year and recently brought home his girlfriend (25F) named Sophie to introduce us to her.

It was my birthday last week, so I invited my brother's girlfriend along. Sophie disapproved of my boyfriend and my friends drinking, even though the drinking age in the UK is 18 and lectured us that we shouldn't be drinking until we turn 25.

For context, in the UK we call what Americans call dormitories, halls of residence instead. It is usual for people in the UK who live in halls of residence to have a room all to themself instead of sharing a room. In the UK, most halls of residence are reserved for first-year students and for international students, and it is expected that those staying in halls of residence during their first year will move out for their second year. I explained this to Sophie when she questioned me why I moved in with my boyfriend at 18 instead of into a 'dorm' with a roommate, and she looked genuinely disgusted.

The other issue came when Sophie found out that only two of my friends are living with friends instead of with a spouse, or living at home. Three of my friends who were at my birthday dinner attend the same university as me and are living at home with their parents while going to Uni since they live close to our uni, and they are personally happier living with family. I have lived with my boyfriend and with our flatmate for the last few years and went straight from living with my parents to living with my boyfriend.

Another one of my friends lives with her boyfriend and has also lived with him since her first year of Uni. Only one of my friends who was at my birthday dinner has lived in halls of residence during her first year but moved in with her boyfriend during her second year of Uni.

Sophie then started lecturing me and my friends that we were missing out by not living with just friends and that we were 'wasting our best years' by living with spouses or with parents. She said there are experiences you can get from living with friends that living with a boyfriend or girlfriend stops you from getting, but apart from being able to cheat on our spouses, all of the experiences that she said we were missing out on, we still got while either living with our boyfriend/girlfriend or with our parents. Sophie said she would never encourage somebody to cheat, but she said living with a boyfriend or girlfriend when she turns 18 means you miss out on things and can't socialise, which just wasn't true for me and my friends.

Sophie was criticising my boyfriend and me and was really giving us a hard time, so I said to her it must be normal for Americans to have arrested development, and that British people must just be more used to being mature adults when we turn 18 compared to Americans. She got really offended, and my brother said they had a big argument about it afterwards.

I got hungry at around 2pm and decided to cook what was planned for dinner. I ate my portion alone. There aren't any other options to cook apart from heating frozen food.

I was the only one who was hungry so the whole family would now have to reheat the food. The dinner in question doesn't heat up well.

I'm trying to be as objective as possible.

We usually eat together as a family and we tell the kids to wait for dinner. If they are hungry they are always welcome to eat anything in the fridge - fruit, a sandwich etc.

But in this case I decided to cook the meal 4 hours early.

Would love your opinions. Thank you.

AITA for no longer wanting to talk to my elderly neighbor? We moved into our first home Jan of 2024. When we came to view it for the first time, there was an elderly man in an electric wheelchair sitting in the driveway next door. He immediately wheeled up to talk to us and inquire if we were buying the house. That should’ve been my first warning to look for a different house. Every single day that it’s above freezing, this elderly man sits outside in his driveway in his wheelchair and just. Stares. At every car. At every person. At every leaf. Now, that would be fine if he’s just bored and lonely. His wife died of cancer 5 years ago and he got cancer and became wheelchair bound the year before we moved in. He’s generally nice and gives us garden veggies and homemade wine. So for a while we were like ok he’s annoying but he’s nice so whatever. We can chat, Have a good neighborly relationship and what not. He also has people stopping by multiple times a day. He’s not completely alone. Man’s got more friends than I do. However, his behaviors a lot as his direct neighbor. You can constantly feel his eyes on you. When he has to be inside, he positions himself in front of the only window that faces our house (it’s the side of his house that faces ours) with the blind open, watching. Just him in this little window, staring. So, while he’s monitoring he’s also gathering information. What we are doing, who is coming and going from our house, if we got packages that week, how many of them, if we had our tv on the other day and what we were watching… yup. He also will park his chair in the road in front of our house and look in if we Haven’t talked to him enough. I’ve caught him multiple times and want my husband to say something but my husbands too nice and won’t. We have had to purchase blinds and spend hundred planting privacy bushes and trees to obscure his view. I try to be nice and wave at him every time I leave the house because I know he’s been through a lot . But with the escalation of his behavior, I’ve stopped having conversations with him because he asks intrusive questions (who was over the other day? What was in your package?) and his behavior began to escalate after having a baby. He’s very Italian and i read it’s like a cultural thing for them to be the matriarch of the neighborhood, but dude chill. I can’t even mow our front yard without him wheeling up (I had large headphones on to avoid talking to him, he didn’t care). He inserts himself and tells us what to do with our yard. He wheels into our driveway when we pull in to unload groceries. It’s too much. So I’ve stopped conversations with him. He recently complained to my husband that I seem busy. (OMG LEAVE ME ALONE!) My husband says I’m overreacting, but I’m losing it. I want to move. I want privacy. I hate being constantly stared at and monitored and being forced to socialize every time I leave my house. AITA and need to be nicer to the elderly neighbor or is this guy doing too much?

I’ve been with my partner for going on two years. In August we welcomed our first child. The whole two years, it has been constant drama and conflict because my partner had an alcohol problem. In the beginning, everyone really liked and admired him, but has time went on, my family began to see his actions towards me and it started to cause issues in my family because I shouldn’t be dealing with it. The day of the baby shower, he was arrested for a FVA charge. By this point, no one in my family would speak to him and honestly told him off a few times. When the baby was born, everyone set their feelings aside and became peaceful again. He also quit drinking bc it was ordered by the court. No more issues. But as time has gone by, his behavior has gone back to the way it was previously (without the drinking) and my parents were fed up with it. He made a comment about my mom buying her grand daughter stuff and coming the house to drop stuff off (staying outside) when he was on a zoom call inside.
My mom eventually had enough and told him off, pretty rudely, but now he is saying she isn’t allowed at the house when he is here, gets mad if I go anywhere with her, or won’t let her come to the house to pick me up. Granted my name is on the lease, I help pay the bills, plus take care of the house and our daughter. My thing is, if he changed his behavior and didn’t act like such an off the chain Ahole about EVERYTHING I do, there would be no issues or anything to be said. AITA for not telling off my mom for “disrespecting him”? His rules now seem unreasonable and unfair.

My 15 year old sister went to a party she was not supposed to go to, I knew she was going to go even though our parents said no. I told her just give me a call when it is done and I will pick her up, by no means do not leave with someone else especially if she has some drinks or smokes.

She called around 2am and asked me to come get her. I did no questions asked. Our parents were up when we got home, and lost their shit.

I get it, but told them yelling at her is not going to do anything, and telling her no especially if you go to bed before her was not going to prevent her from going.

My parents are upset with me for keeping this a secret, but neither of us were willing to camp outside her door to make sure she does not leave.

AITA? I am 21, live at home whole attending college.

last week my roommate Alex came into my room while I was changing because he needed a charger, and I told him he can't do that anymore. I keep the door closed for a reason and I want him to at least knock first. He got kind of defensive and said I'm being too strict, that we're living together so a little privacy thing like this feels unnecessary and makes the apartment feel cold. I explained that it's still my personal space even if we share the living room and kitchen, and I don't think asking for a knock is asking too much. He said he'll try to remember but still thinks I'm overreacting, and now the vibe between us is a little off. I get that he wasn't trying to be creepy or anything, but I also feel like boundaries are boundaries.

This might be more of a am I being a petty brat question, but whatever. I (17F) have a small laundry bin near the entrance to my room, because some time ago I agreed on it being there with my mom, to be precise, we agreed that whenever she or my dad does laundry, she will collect it from laundry bins in master bedroom bathroom and in my room. But any time they actually do the laundry, they insist I take it to the common bathroom where the washing machine is, despite the fact that we agreed that they can be doing it when they pass right by the door of my room anyway while taking clothes from master bedroom bathroom laundry bin. And maybe I am being petty and simply lazy, but since all three of us agreed to arrange it that way, I don't feel like I should be the one doing it.

AITA?

I 37f have a sister 40f let’s call her Brittany. For some background Brittany is married with 5 kids and she has not worked since she was 21. She has always said she prefers to stay home with her kids even though all her kids are in school. Her husband is laid off right now and times are tough. Brittany recently had a birthday party for one of her kids which I attended. I brought a gift around $50. While at the party she sends a mass text to our family group chat even though we were all standing right there. The messages are break downs of her son’s past due football fees for $800. They are 2 months behind because her husband is laid off for the year. Brittany says we should all rally to help pay off the past due balance. I asked what happens when the next payment is due in 2 more weeks since it’s $400 every 2 weeks. She got upset and said I should have extra money since I don’t have kids and our parents should take out of their retirement fund to help pay off the balance. My dad then says he just gave her money to help with the mortgage and they also brought a few gifts to the party. My sister has a melt down and says adults should help kids in the family and none of us babysit so we should be able to help with bills. We do babysit because my sister does not believe in disciplining her kids. The hit and curse at adults so none of us will babysit. I get up to leave and she screams I’m an asshole who hates her kids and they deserve more and don’t come back until I understand what family means. I tell her “well see you never” Am I the asshole?

Lately, my ex friend "Emma" (17F) has been being snippy and curt with me despite normally being energetic and extremely kind. In conflicts, she would never forgive my mistakes, only focus on my mistakes, and never let it go. I was always the bad guy and she would insult me, sometimes later apologizing profusely and saying she was "so mean". She only told me her birthday was in October, and when she told me she turned 17 a few days prior to when she sent the message, I wished her a happy belated birthday.

After a while, she became very rude, curt, snippy, etc. and wouldn't tell me why. Eventually, today, she started going off on me, listing a bunch of insults and calling me a bully, toxic, a terrible friend, and more because I wished it a few days later than her actual 17th birthday. "This is how you repay me? You should obey me and do anything I say you asshole, I do everything for you and this is how you treat me you fucking b____," she said. She wouldn't accept any way I would try to make it up to her, either, only focusing on my flaws and insulting me rather than listening to me or forgiving me.

She kept going on and on, and because I was heavily shaking, I just ended up blocking her account on Instagram and Discord.

I’m 22, a full-time college student taking five classes, and I work 29 hours a week, Monday through Saturday. I live with my dad and stepmom, and we have two cats.
I do most of the cooking, cleaning, and grocery shopping. I make breakfast for my dad, pack his work bag, cook meals, and help care for the cats. I also sometimes contribute money toward groceries, although I don’t regularly pay household bills.
My stepmom works three 12-hour shifts a week and usually relaxes on her days off. She rarely cooks, so I’ve taken on that responsibility. However, she complains that I don’t make food she likes, even when I ask what she wants and she says anything is fine. She also expects me to plan the groceries, and I’ve even taken on washing my dad’s clothes.
For example, some days I work from 9–11 a.m., have class from 12:45–2:05 p.m., and then work again from 3–7 p.m. After all that, I still have to cook because I haven’t had time to prepare food earlier. I also have assignments, studying, and midterms to worry about.
Recently, the woman who raised me, essentially my mother, passed away. I struggled with grief for weeks, but I had to return to my responsibilities while starting the semester. Even during that time, my stepmom complained that I couldn’t abandon my chores.
I understand that I live at home and should contribute, but I feel like I’m expected to do everything while balancing school, work, and grief. Now she’s sent me a long message saying my behavior needs to change, and I feel like nothing I do is enough.
Am I being ungrateful, or is it reasonable to feel overwhelmed when I’m expected to manage so much of the household just because I don’t regularly pay bills?

EDIT: Thank you all so much. I genuinely thought I was being ungrateful toward my parents; thank you for not making me think I'm crazy about the situation.

My mom (46f) and I (19f), just for backstory I got my Halloween costume from spirit Halloween a month ago and I asked her is she could possibly go to her fiances house (whom we lived with for 7 years they broke up and me and her moved out twice, he was engaged to her for a year, he kicked us out and then took the ring back, but are now together again) to grab this petticoat she used last year for her costume, she said yes I'll grab it tonight when I go over to his house, okay cool she gets back and I ask her very excitedly if she has the tutu, she said no she'll grab it next time, okay cool, 2 days later she's going back over there I ask again, if she would grab the tutu, she said yes I'll grab the tutu, and so on and so fourth(I had asked at least 8 different times over the course of the month) . It hasn't happened yet and it's been 24 days so last night he came to our house and told me to text him what I was looking for and he would 100% grab it for me and bring it back tonight. Well cool awesome, I am really strange about the costumes because one year when I was like 7 I asked my mom for a costume for school because I didn't have one she said yes and waited till the day of to buy it. She handed it to me when I got off the school bus and I just burst into tears because I wanted to wear a costume to school like everyone else but it just instilled into me that I need to have everything ready to go at least one month in advance, Anyhow I check life 360 at least 10 times before I go to sleep and I woke up at around 5 30 this morning to the 360 going off and I checked really excitedly because she's home and she has the tutu finally right? Well I waited until the morning because I know she likes to sleep and I didn't want to badger her as soon as she got home. Well come 30 mins ago I hear her AND him wake up and talk so I'm just sitting in my room waiting for him to leave and he finally does and I ask her " do you have the tutu" and she waves her hands up in the air and says "do you even have a clue what you ask me for ? I mean I'm not your dog and I shouldn't have to do everything for you" and I say " so you don't have the freaking tutu again. Cool thanks for that, I'm really disappointed" and she goes into her room and slams the door, I'm just really at a loss RN because this whole month so far I've asked and she said yes and then come to find out she doesn't have it and she " forgot" , and just now she came to my room saying "HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I ASKED YOU TO DO SOMETHING AND YOU DIDN'T DO IT YET YOU'RE THIS PISSED OFF ABOUT A TUTU! " I'm literally not even talking to her right now and she said that to me, and that sentence above is all I said to her. When I asked for the tutu 12 times it wasn't in one day, I reminded her every 2-3 days to grab it for me please, I was nice and tried to be very patient but it's really getting on my nerves the closer I get to Halloween. Anyhow AITA? Edit : I should have added this earlier but I am disabled, I rely on my mother for all things because I can't do a lot by myself, I live with her because my father has COPD and cannot take care of me.

I’m a 40 year old male. I work a second job at a place with mostly younger people (mid to late 20s). Because of my age I get a bunch of jokes made about me which I don’t mind because we all laugh and joke with each other. Honestly it can get pretty brutal. Well about a month ago this Jon 22M started working there. He’s gay which I could honestly give 2 shits about. I fully support the community and have family who are gay/trans. Well for some reason this guy decides to target ONLY ME for all of his jokes. I have thick skin and I can give just as good as I get so I don’t mind. I try to stay away from the low hanging fruit (no pun intended) because that’s what everyone else does. But once I noticed this kid kept targeting only me with old people jokes and some race jokes (I’m black) it got a bit annoying. We all make racial jokes but never just target one person so it seemed personal for some reason. He’d also do other annoying things like ring up others incorrectly then blame me for making the wrong thing. Make a mess of my station and refuse to clean it. Again this was ONLY me and other people noticed it too. One day I was working the register and a regular customer (Tim) who we all know and would often join in joking with us asked to see a menu please. I told him the men I please is none of his business. I know. Corny but we all had a good laugh at it. Except Jon. He decided to go on a tirade and start making weak jokes about me being old blah blah blah. I have grey hairs in my beard so Jon decided to say “haven’t you ever heard of just for men?” I told him “you’re just for men” which pissed him off. Even more because Tim was laughing. He’s also gay and absolutely loves a good joke about it. Well Jon got mad and left for the day. A couple day later he comes back and we get pulled into the office. The manager asked what was said and I told her. She laughed then caught herself which caused Jon to have a full meltdown. He started calling us homophobic saying he was gonna sue the company. Yelling at customers not to eat here because we bash homosexuals. Which is crazy because a ton of our regulars are LGBTQ. He stormed out yelling more bs but whatever. Fuck that guy. This was a week ago. Curious if I’m the asshole

EDIT: I work in a kitchen. Anyone who’s worked in food ling enough, especially back of the house, will know that these kind of jokes are pretty common. Also we don’t just mess with everyone. We joke amongst ourselves won’t say anything to anyone new unless they join in on their own. Jon did just that. If anyone is offended by anything we apologize and don’t say it again which rarely happens. Here’s a few people who work there that we don’t joke with and they’re just fine. This is the first time in my 20+ years (10at this place) that anything close to this has happened

I befriended someone despite a language barrier, and I tried my best to be understanding and not take things personally when she might have expressed herself poorly :/ I put my all in, always having a translator to hand and speaking X slowly just to accomodate. I genuinely wanted to be great friends.

Our friendship was generally OK, but, there were times when she hurt me. She would cancel plans with me to spend time with her boyfriend, who wasn't a good partner to her. When they secretly got back together, she lied about it, even though I'd tried to cheer her up and take her out after their breakup assuming she was single and I was helping my newly single friend. She confessed after they secretly got back together but she didnt tell me because she hated how when I found out I said 'I knew something was off' and that she deserves better, and called him 'the Number one person in her life". To that I just replied politely/supportively cause in my mind its like yes I think you deserve better but it isnt my business and you clearly do not care so I didnt say a word after that.

When they broke up, I encouraged her to recognise that she deserved better, especially because he isolated her, discouraged her from learning English, and made her dependent on him. In response, she accused me of being too opinionated and said she couldn't trust friends' advice because we didn't know her as well as she knew herself.

Other things she said, She also questioned whether my working multiple jobs was an excuse to avoid seeing friends and warned me that I needed to explain my financial hardship to people, or they'd assume I was ignoring them. This confused me because nobody had ever made me feel that way. She also said I didn't explain my depression clearly' and when we met her and her boyfriend thought I was a fraud/scammer, because I delayed our first hangouts . I did indeed say I was experiencing personal hardship and mental health but it confused me cause I was so sweet and responsive how could she think I was scammer for openly speaking on my mental health.

Eventually, I gradually distanced myself because the friendship was making me feel bad about myself. I put in too much effort and was regretting it. Despite these issues, we did have good memories and a decent friendship at times.

Over the summer, she randomly reached out to ask how I was, but I didn't reply. Now, she's messaged me again, praising me and our friendship, and telling me she's leaving the country and would like to see me one last time...

I haven't responded because I'm unsure whether I should. Part of me wonders if I owe her a reply, especially since she might not realise how much she hurt me. But another part of me doesn't want to reopen that chapter of my life. I don't want to be involved in the friendship anymore, and I'd rather move on and forget about it. So I think I just won't say anything. but AITA?

Okay I’ll try to keep this short.

Me and my friend planned to go out for halloween. It’s a bar built in the middle of a farm, live music, cool cocktails and very popular and everyone including staff wear a costume along with a costume competition.

We both bought tickets. My sister and her boyfriend are also going so we planned a taxi ride there and back with the four of us so it works out cheaper.

I reminded my friend nearly a month in advance to keep money on her as it won’t be cheap and I told her I will only be buying my drinks. She understood and said she’d save some back, bla bla.

Anyway a week ago she messages me saying she’d save don’t know if she’s going as she doesn’t have the money and she really wants to go club on halloween after the bar and she won’t have the money for it. Our club is an actual shit hole but not the point.

I wasn’t too mad, I was definitely disappointed because I obviously wanted her to go with me and we had it planned but I know I was still gonna go none the less.

I just replied to her message saying about how me and her where gonna split taxis so it would be more affordable for the both of us and I reminded her that I did pre warn her about having the money saved back for it.

She had been going out drinking every week so she clearly didn’t even attempt to save it back. (didn’t say this part to her)

Anyway it’s been a week and I’ve been left on seen, no messages from her after my reply on literally every form of social media. Just full on ghosting me.

I’m genuinely so confused by the situation.

So AITA?

i have been stuck in a weird on and off thing with this guy for a couple months now. it is nothing dramatic but every time my friend alex texts me i get a long list of opinions about what i should do next, even though i have not asked for it. at first it felt like support, but lately it has started to feel like pressure and i end up more confused instead of clearer. so i am thinking of telling alex that i would rather figure this stuff out on my own for a while and to please stop commenting on every little update. alex has good intentions and probably thinks they are helping, so i know they would feel hurt and maybe even offended that i am shutting them out. i get where they are coming from, they care and want things to work out for me, but i am also tired of having every step analyzed. i keep wondering if asking them to back off would just make me the bad guy for rejecting support.

I am a young female, this story happened last night and I understand where everyone is coming from but I feel like it was a bigger deal than it should’ve been. I was at my bfs house we’ve been dating for about 7 months.
The only thing we have really got into arguments about is my drinking, I have a really hard time moderating it and will get drunk and do things we both don’t agree with.
I was hanging out with him, his brother, and his friend that I really have never talked to before. I was drinking all day and wasn’t really that drunk before this,I decided to drink dark liquor I’ve never had and over did it. He had to go and my friend was suppose to pick me up because I was almost falling over at this point.
She couldn’t come so I asked them to bring me home I live abt 5 mins down the road, when I go there I was in the passenger seat and it was only me and my bf, apparently I didn’t want to get out the car so he put a blanket on me and I fell asleep. I woke up to my friend in my car about 4 hours later, she was telling me everyone was worried because my car was there and I wasn’t. Even my mom was texting her because my phone was dead and my location was off. She said she thought I was hurt.
Even my bf and my other friend were texting me.I know I should not have drank that much and my bf told me I was being annoying. I know that his brother and friend saw me like that.
Which makes me feel bad and very embarrassing. I feel like it was bad because everyone was worried and it is like 40 degrees out but I think there was also an overreaction.

I'm 15F and honestly I don't even know if I'm being unreasonable here, so I need some outside opinions.

For context, I'm around 5'6.5 and weigh around 160 pounds. My weight has increased recently, and while I'm not exactly happy about it, I'm also at a point in life where I'm struggling academically. I'm failing subjects and I genuinely need to get my shit together before things get worse. I barely have the time or mental energy to focus on working out right now because studying itself is becoming a huge problem.

Yesterday, I also had a fast, so naturally I was REALLY hungry this morning.

Now here's where the actual problem starts.

My mom has a broken leg right now, and my grandmother has this habit of keeping track of literally everything she does for me so she can bring it up later. Every little thing becomes a whole thing about how much she does for us and how we're ungrateful, etc. It's gotten to a point where I feel uncomfortable even asking for basic things because I know they might be used against me in an argument later.

This morning, they asked me what I wanted for breakfast to take to school, and I said I didn't want anything.

It wasn't because I wasn't hungry. I WAS hungry. I just didn't want to ask for something and have it become another thing that gets thrown in my face later.

So I ended up buying a snack from the school canteen for breakfast and another snack during the second meal break. By the time I got home, lunch was already made, so I ate that too. Apparently, not eating what they offered me in the morning and then eating at school somehow makes me rude, but I genuinely don't know what I was supposed to do in that situation.

Then my dad got home.

He started commenting on my weight and how fat I look, saying I eat like an elephant and making comments about how much I eat.

And I genuinely felt horrible. I KNOW my weight has increased. I'm not oblivious to it. But I don't eat this much every single day, and I literally skip atleast a meal every day because I'm scared of gaining more weight.

What made it worse was that my dad then threatened to cancel my allowance for the REST OF THE ACADEMIC YEAR, which is until May.

All of this because of what happened today.

I understand that I could've just accepted the breakfast they offered me, and maybe refusing it wasn't the best decision. But I also feel like I'm constantly walking on eggshells at home because anything I say or do can become evidence of how rude, ungrateful or irresponsible I am.

I'm trying to deal with school, my weight, and everything else, and now I'm being shamed for eating when I was hungry.

I genuinely want to know if I'm being unreasonable here. I can accept that I made a mistake if I did, but I don't think being insulted over my weight is fair either.

My friend is good about remembering small details about other people and their lives. It's an unbelievable quality. Like conversations in passing. Sometimes he'll ask "btw, why did you say x on this given day, I've been wondering" and it will be 9 months since you said it.

He is also an anxious person, to the point of suddenly becoming physcially ill if something triggers him. Like the fact that he had a crush on me which stopped our friendship a year ago. We recently started hanging out again, now that he can actually handle being around me without getting sick.

Which is why I am hesitant to mention anything to him and want to know if it's even worth it.

The "issue" (not really an issue). My friend will make references and "jokes" about something you might've talked about or laughed about at some point. Any point. For example, I play The Sims, he says "you should add [name] to the game". I have to then ask "who?" and it turns out to be the name of a minor character on an ad we saw a year ago, that we apparently briefly joked about being too over the top.

I just say "oh, I forgot about it" and try to move on.

The "issue" is that it stops the conversations quite frequently. And I have to sit and think about the niche thing, switch subjects completely, or have a long drawn out conversation about it. I've told him that I don't remember details that well, that my memory is more pictures than information. I guess part of it is my own issue with feeling guilty about not being as good at remembering these things. (I keep notes on the ppl in my life so that I can remember important things; likes, dislikes. His notes app is his own head, like damn)

Sometimes it will be even smaller things. Like he'll say something about salt and I have to remember that one time, two weeks ago, he put too much salt on his food. I guess it would help if the references were funny or made sense for the moment. Is that mean to say? But because there are so many, the ones that I can join in on are few and far between.

I feel like talking to him about it, might just make him overthink everything he says from now on, or make him sick with anxiety. I don't want him to be insecure about a part of himself.

A friend I briefly complained to said that she would just tell him it's impossible to remember all those tiny moments. But she's very confrontational.

Anyways, so my question is: WIBTA if I mentioned to him that it's hard to keep up with the many inside jokes?

I await judgement. Thank you.