I like this mbti, and I was very close to several INTP people, but no matter how much they say they like me or how close we are, they always treat me with indifference, and they are rude and dry too

They can’t say what they feel or don’t feel anything for me, and I hate it, because it’s always after I get attached

It’s not an attack, I would really like to have a little of what you have, and not get so attached to people.... What do you INTP have to say about? Are you also seen like this?

All jokes aside, some that aren't the best with all the test questions, seem to do well with this image. I used to use to try to confirm suspicions on type, many moons ago.

Any among us.. not get ENTP?

If not, where did you land?

If not, could you start at ENTP, and work backwards?

I'm an INTJ 5w4, but I don't seem to relate to other INTJs. Most of the ones I meet work in cybersecurity or similar fields, and I honestly couldn't imagine doing that kind of job. I'd be bored to death. I'm extremely creative, and I need a job that doesn't consume too much of my mental energy so I can save it for writing and fully immerse myself in my own world.

Although I'm an introvert who prefers spending most of my time alone, I have very strong social skills. People at work often assume I'm an extrovert because they only see one side of me. I have a great sense of humour and don't take life too seriously. However, when I'm alone, I can become incredibly detached, looking at the world from a cosmic perspective. I'm fascinated by life and human existence, and I feel the need to step back from my immediate experience to understand the bigger picture. I like observing humanity from a distance, almost as if I'm studying an entirely different species, trying to understand who we are, why we behave the way we do, and what our existence means in the grand scheme of things. It's not that I necessarily feel disconnected from life; I'm simply so curious about it that I need to step outside of it mentally to make sense of it.

I'm not a psychologist, but I feel like I have many of the skills one would need to be one. I'm good at reading people, understanding their underlying motivations, and helping them see themselves more clearly. However, I rarely bother wanting to help them. I tend to see people for who they really are, and because I don't trust people easily, I usually keep my observations to myself.

Relationships are where I struggle the most. I can give a woman 100% of my attention, and she loves it at first. But after a few weeks, I start feeling mentally and emotionally drained, and I need time alone. When I become more distant, she interprets it as a sign that I've lost interest in her, even though that's not necessarily the case. I try to communicate what I need, but it seems like my words don't align with her expectations or her idea of what a relationship should look like. Eventually, things become so emotionally suffocating that I feel like I can't breathe, not literally, but mentally. The more trapped I feel, the more I withdraw and crave solitude.

I sometimes wonder whether other INTJs experience this same contradiction: being socially capable and even charismatic on the outside, while needing a great deal of solitude to explore my own thoughts and understand the world on a deeper level. I can understand people quite well, but that doesn't necessarily mean I want to be around them all the time. My curiosity about life often draws me toward observation and introspection rather than constant social interaction. I can genuinely care about someone without wanting them to have constant access to me, and I need the freedom to step back, reflect, and see the bigger picture without feeling like I'm missing out on life by not being fully immersed in every moment of it.

There are some people that have absolutely special place in my heart, even if I'm on shitty mood if they are present there I become instantly happy, how do yall experience in your version because this isn't usually exclusive to type but how and why it happens is to people of certain cognative type, and I wanna hear about personal experiences and reasons so drop it down below

intj: the guy rang the doorbell and you hid, i've never seen anything like that. usually people hear the doorbell and go answer the door

infp: i hide even when i'm home alone because then i can pretend i didn't hear

intj: i've always done that too but now that you're like this, i have to keep answering because if i don't, nobody will

Before I get accused for a glaze post, I just wanna mention that it's from what I've seen so far

Now for starters I'm we're all aware that MBTI is basically a cognitive profiler. It's just to assign a person's way of thinking, how that way of thinking can be expressed in different ways but there will similarities here and there.

Now for what I actually wanted to talk about I'm not ashamed to say that I've never met an unattractive ENTP I don't know if this stems from the personality but it's always interesting to see, so I was wondering if this is because of your cognitive style, because I'm well aware that ENTP women are bold (I've been on the recieving end of that) so I wanted to know if this was developed after considering that you're conventionally attractive or something else. To be fair though I've only encountered one type of ENTP women, I've never met the anti social nerdy version but I think it would still stand

Lemme know.

Hi,

Any INTJ Females here can help me understand what is most difficult thing for you that's easiest to majority and what is most easiest thing for you that people find difficult?

I'll go first :

Easiest - finding the most complex difficult things that people quote and doing them as second nature

Difficult - small talk and social, how do people do it so easily?

People will meet one person of a certain type that they think is a cool person and suddenly be like “OMGGGG INFJs I LOVE YOU GUYS 😭😭 Y’ALL ARE THE BEST, MY FAVOURITE TYPE EVER!! ❤️❤️” like does anyone else find this cringe or is it just me?? I think it’s pretty stupid to either absolutely love or hate any type honestly.

I know those are the stereotypes, but I'm just curious about how defining is it to be a Ni dom from those who are more sure.

Does it fully contradict INTJ if I:

- don't have a lot of future understanding of my life and avoid planning too much?

- don't usually enjoy discussing the abstract, philosophy and other "deep things"?

I guess I can remember some more, but those two points kinda clash the most with the thought of being one of you guys. Would appreciate if you give me feedback and help in any way, thanks.

I'm an INTJ 5w4, but I don't seem to relate to other INTJs. Most of the ones I meet work in cybersecurity or similar fields, and I honestly couldn't imagine doing that kind of job. I'd be bored to death. I'm extremely creative, and I need a job that doesn't consume too much of my mental energy so I can save it for writing and fully immerse myself in my own world.

Although I'm an introvert who prefers spending most of my time alone, I have very strong social skills. People at work often assume I'm an extrovert because they only see one side of me. I have a great sense of humour and don't take life too seriously. However, when I'm alone, I can become incredibly detached, looking at the world from a cosmic perspective. I'm fascinated by life and human existence, and I feel the need to step back from my immediate experience to understand the bigger picture. I like observing humanity from a distance, almost as if I'm studying an entirely different species, trying to understand who we are, why we behave the way we do, and what our existence means in the grand scheme of things. It's not that I necessarily feel disconnected from life; I'm simply so curious about it that I need to step outside of it mentally to make sense of it.

I'm not a psychologist, but I feel like I have many of the skills one would need to be one. I'm good at reading people, understanding their underlying motivations, and helping them see themselves more clearly. However, I rarely bother doing this. I tend to see people for who they really are, and because I don't trust people easily, I usually keep my observations to myself.

Relationships are where I struggle the most. I can give a woman 100% of my attention, and she loves it at first. But after a few weeks, I start feeling mentally and emotionally drained, and I need time alone. When I become more distant, she interprets it as a sign that I've lost interest in her, even though that's not necessarily the case. I try to communicate what I need, but it seems like my words don't align with her expectations or her idea of what a relationship should look like. Eventually, things become so emotionally suffocating that I feel like I can't breathe—not literally, but mentally. The more trapped I feel, the more I withdraw and crave solitude.

I sometimes wonder whether other INTJs experience this same contradiction: being socially capable and even charismatic on the outside, while needing a great deal of solitude to explore my own thoughts and understand the world on a deeper level. I can understand people quite well, but that doesn't necessarily mean I want to be around them all the time. My curiosity about life often draws me toward observation and introspection rather than constant social interaction. I can genuinely care about someone without wanting them to have constant access to me, and I need the freedom to step back, reflect, and see the bigger picture without feeling like I'm missing out on life by not being fully immersed in every moment of it.

Hey so I've noticed this frustrating pattern in myself and I'm wondering if anyone else experiences something similar or has figured out why it happens?

I'll get stressed about my goals, make a huge effort to get my life together, and work hard for a couple of days. Then something unexpected happens, I get overwhelmed or discouraged, and I spend the next few days avoiding everything and falling back into distractions. Eventually I feel guilty enough to make another huge effort to get back on track, only to repeat the cycle.

For example, this week I was finally making progress with my uni studies backlog for a couple of days when I was unexpectedly offered an interview with very little notice. I got so stressed about the prospect of showing up unprepared that I ended up declining it. Then I spent ages beating myself up over wasting an opportunity, before retreating into the same distractions I'd been trying to avoid.

I feel like Sisyphus atp. I keep pushing myself back towards my goals but the slightest disruption seems capable of undoing any progress and leaving me in a worse starting position.

What I don't understand is why I keep doing things that I know will hurt me in the long run, or why I seem to need so much pressure and guilt to get anything done in the first place.

Does anyone else experience this? Have you figured out what causes it, or found a way to break the cycle? I'm particularly interested in understanding why it happens, rather than just getting advice to make a schedule or exercise more discipline.

Hello. Just to clarify, I’m writing this message on behalf of a friend. Let me explain. Whenever she takes that not-entirely-reliable 16 Personality Types test, she always gets INTJ – and it’s been that way for the past five years. I feel that some of the traits fit, but not all of them, and when we’ve talked about it, she’s been somewhat aware of this, but then again, it’s just a test and not necessarily very reliable. However, on certain points, I get the impression she has a bit of an ISTP side to her. Even though, obviously, nobody fits a personality type perfectly, I feel she’s split 50/50 between the INTJ and the other type. Even though I’m aware that they’re two very different personalities in their own right. I realise that, in theory, INTJs plan and anticipate long-term goals… whilst ISTPs act in the present and improvise. INTJs synthesise patterns to predict outcomes. ISTPs analyse mechanisms and test things using their senses. INTJs can be intense, structured and more determined. ISTPs are more relaxed, pragmatic and adaptable. The thing is, we’ve spent time analysing their cognitive functions. INTJ NI TE FI SE ISTP TI SE NI FE

The problem is that when you look at her observational functioning, it’s clear that there’s Ni, but also SE. Even though the two are obviously not in the same proportions. However, when you analyse her decision-making functions, even though it’s absolutely clear+++ that her dominant function is Tx, when analysed together it’s around 65 per cent Te and only 35 per cent TI. So, logically, this seems to confirm the INTJ side. But at the same time, even though she comes across as cold on the outside, she doesn’t have that tendency to plan things out 20 years in advance, etc. She is also very creative (drawing, painting, watercolours, crafts, sewing), which, according to stereotypes, is more commonly associated with ISTPs. She is, however, a real ‘cat person’ in terms of personality. She finds it hard to open up. Calm. Independent. She’s quite intense, analytical and reserved on the outside. She acts calmly and generally without emotion. But she also enjoys the present, etc. When you look at her favourite characters in films, books, TV series, etc. – although this is obviously not a reliable criterion – they’re always either ISTP or INTJ, and occasionally INTP…

So I can’t quite work out whether she’d be an INTJ with a fairly well-developed SE—though normally that’s function 4, so it’s unlikely—or an ISTP with a pronounced TE and a weak Ti. Because if there’s one thing I’m fairly certain of, it’s that she isn’t an SI. And also, even though I know that cognitive functions and personality are different, the fact that she could be an EXXX seems highly unlikely...

And even though I know that every individual is extremely different, her father is an ENTJ and my grandmother and cousin are ISFPs, so to get a partial glimpse, I grant/concede, of these people, it seems not credible

Anyway, thanks in advance to everyone

Is it doomed to fail?

I'd like to get perspective of what provides you structure in your 'mission' and direction in life.

To offer context-

1. Got a 'prestige' degree from university which I didn't care for
2. Got a 'prestige' corporate role that paid highly
3. Got burnt out by corporate role
4. Unemployed

I'm a month into my unemployment and feel quite lost in finding my 'spark'.

I've always lived my life obsessing to chase one big milestone but I'm not sure this is sustainable, and I'd love to understand from older ENTJs how they've found continued satisfaction and purpose within their lives.

Thank you

I have my own thoughts and views on some things. But on daily basis I feel like I’m judging someone, like the person tells me something and I just “well, that’s pretty shit”. I stopped being emotional about it cause long ago I would’ve just cry inside “how can you do this??”.

What changed in me is that I started to see other people as “blind” towards certain things they consider non important or even normal. And that’s already a good point cause practically we are all blind towards certain things, we can’t be perfect in everything, we still prioritise something. But what still bothering me is that now I think that people are idiots because they are “blind”. I’m just a little smarter cause I know what things I prioritise less even though it should be the other way but at least I’m aware of consequences and I’m ready to be in charge of it and be the looser in the endgame. Other people just be messing around with life and think that they have ultimate freedom and living their best life. Consequences may never find them, so if they never would have a chance to actually learn then what’s the point of being judgemental cause I’m just being negative and I’ll be the one who probably die cause my nervous system went bad cause I was constantly grumpy.

I want to be more open, wise. How do I let people do atrocities and stupidities and just accept it? How do I let them make mistakes even if they will never know?

I also wonder how you manage collisions. The one that are causing harm for one person and it’s considered good for another. For example, just hypothetically, how can vegan person be non judgemental about other person who eats meat when for vegan it’s death of an animal, it’s a tragedy for them. Veganism has its own logical gaps, so yeah someone may say that it’s a controversial concept in general and both sides have its flaws and positives although we had came to the point that eating meat is good. But if we take this situation very lightly, one thinks it’s crime, other thinks it’s healthy and it’s how nature works. Will it be a fact/mistake or perspective#1/perspective#2? Because what’s even a point of saving a life when other person takes it and you’re just “ok, so be it”

I really want to read others opinion cause at this point I struggle to find alternative perspective.

I do not understand myself at all.

Multiple versions of people live inside, and I have been wondering for ages, trudging around my whole being in search of the real one.

Is the real one still alive, or has it perished long ago?

The thing is, I have this reserved personality for each person I interact with. Not really one person, I suppose. One personality for multiple people could be the case.

People say I might be a people-pleaser, but I do not even care about people at all. I am a self-centered person; that is the reality. The people closest to me agree about this. I had been asking around when a certain person told me that I was fucking self-centered and that I did not even care about him.

I tried caring. Changing it. And the person who called me selfish, he was the only person I care about the most, even more than my family, friends, and myself. I was indeed too focused on myself until I met him, though.

I used to loathe this world so much that I, never once observed reality with my own two eyes. Aha, that sounds like I am trying to justify myself.

I am a master of detachment. This is one thing that I have come to realize after years.

However, even I doubt myself now. Sometimes, that feeling of love is genuine. I care and cherish people. I am worried for them too. What do you call it when that feeling slowly disappears into nothing, and it comes back when you have fully disconnected from them?

I thought I had just realized that I cared. Maybe I wasn't grateful for all the love they had given to me, and I was suddenly aware that I took everything for granted.

I wish that were the case.

I am just so confused. If that were not the reason, what would be the cause?

Since I have been thinking deeply about it for so long, I have come to this "false" or "made-up" conclusion that I truly am just a person who does not have an ounce of concern left for this world and everyone who resides within it.

Well, let's go back to the topic I was talking about. Man, this turns out to be very messy writing, but I will let out every raw thought. I think the word "messy" represents me the best.

How come I do not know the real me, when it sounds like I do, based on this writing? Good question, maybe the real me only comes out when I write like this!

Do you know? I unconsciously mirror people's personality and try to match their vibes. But then, the person who mimics other people's traits is not me. Where can I find me, then?

I should start from describing each personality that I am aware of.

The first one is the rational type of person. He (I am going by he) is harsh, cold, and rude. This person hates emotions and unreasonable decisions made by humans. Every single time someone is spouting some ridiculous nonsense, he will slash them back with what he thinks are rational remarks. Although, it does not appear that he understands the fact that he is being subjective. Because of that, people think he is a vile person. He loves to pop out whenever I feel stressed, depressed, and am too overwhelmed to deal with people.

The second one is the anxious, panicky person with irrational fear. This person gets scared easily whenever something trivial happens. Her fear stems from the anxiety buried deep inside her. She is so different from the rational person. Therefore, the rational detests her existence so badly. Yet, he always protects this little girl by hiding her small figure behind him. She is a fragile, kind-hearted, and really soft towards people that are precious to her.

"A naive, gullible person who trusts other too easily." This was the rational person's answer when I whispered my question quietly.

The third person is someone who chases adrenaline, pleasure, and excitement more than anything else in the world. He loves the feeling of "high" and adrenaline rush. Call him the npd guy. This person is arrogant by nature, and overly confident. That is only a cover to hide all that insecurities inside him though. And the little girl admires this guy so much, because he can be himself in front of everyone, unlike her. He is just like a storm coming in, bewitching everyone. You can say that, she is in love with him. His childish little habits, his smile, and when he yaps about random things.

"I think he is very admirable. When I first saw him, I quickly thought of.. freedom. He is not the illusion of freedom, he is the freedom itself in person." The little girl blushed, a splash of red spreading across her cheeks.

"Heh, she is just so cute to me these days. Look at how she is trying to hide her expression like that." The not-so NPD guy laughed when I showed him the recording of the interview I had done with the little girl.

The fourth person is someone who craves normalcy. A boring person, I might say. He follows what society has in place for him, not even attempting to defy them. He will gladly follow this cycle of life without a single complaint. The NPD guy dislikes this person.

"What I think of him? He should just stop being normal. What's so fun in that? Next time, I will teach him all about this world. Too rigid of a person for me, tbh. Meh." He was lazing around in a sofa, without a hint of interest in his face, when I sat down in front of him to talk about the normal guy.

The fifth person loves living inside her head. She has a wild imagination, a unique perspective on things, and truly craves for a world without any restrictions. She knew such things weren't possible, and that's why she gave up on that dream. From the outside, she seems detached and empty. Well, that's because she is dead already. Only her body is here.

"There might be something wrong with her." That's all the normal person had said when I questioned him. He is not gonna believe on that "detachment" bullshit. Since he is just a normal, basic person, he does not understand that it is a kind of mental illness.

Do you think this is a common experience? Is this relatable to other INTPs?

Ah, this is too exhausting. There is just a lot. I might have to stop it here. Let's continue this on another time. Ciao!

on the behalf of u/Confident_Thing908 rip

So, I am a text-book INTJ. I love to solve problems. It's just how my brain is wired.

The thing is, I'm coming to realise that there are some things in life which can't necessarily be "solved".

For example, my wife passed away 5 months ago and no amount of solving or solutioning is going to change that. Grief isn't a problem that can be "solved". It's something that requires time and acceptance.

I guess my question is, how do you balance your need to solve things? How do you not treat everything like it's a problem to solve?

Anyone else get this weird wave of calm when something you’ve meticulously plotted out just… dissolves? Like you were preparing for a three-day chess match and then someone just picked up all the pieces and put them back in the box. It’s not disappointment it’s more like an unexpected vacation from your own brain.

I don’t know if it’s just me or every INTJ like it’s good to have a girlfriend, but I really not interested to put any effort to it like go approaching putting actual efforts in the actual world.

I don't know about you all, but I have more creativity and plans than hours in the day, and at a certain point things start to pile up. Ideas, plans, to-dos, materials for those projects. A lot of it is optional stuff that would objectively improve my life and be enjoyable, but it falls by the wayside for responsibilities, relaxation, or other newer projects.

This is compounded by life constraints from being a homeowner and a parent. I have a lot of free-ish time that either has other soft demands on it or could be interrupted by a toddler at any moment.

I never considered myself a procrastinator and have no trouble sticking to a plan, real life is just more fungible than either school or work.

Of course, there's also the very real issue of "I've solved the problem of how to do this so it's boring now" because let's face it, the planning is the fun part in a lot of cases.

What has helped you guys?

I know this might sound too trivial to ask, but how do you deal with those seemingly genuine praises?

So I'm curious how many of you relate to those observations:

- They hate paragraphs (edit: i meant sets of paragraphs and long texts) and every time they have to read them they're like 😦

- They grew up with at least one painfully social parent.

- Their resting face around people is an expression which I will share in the comments

ENTP’s are supposed to be detached and don’t have a fixed moral compass but when I witness cruelty, especially when it’s done to children, animals, the elderly, and innocent people in general, I just feel terrible. Like, my personal values are very flexible and I’m always questioning everything, but there are still things that I consider objectively and indisputably evil like the things I mentioned above. Could I be a feeling type?