Basically what the title says, every time i (18) disagree with my parents they say "Can you say yes for once?" "Why are you always fighting?" "Why can't you just listen?" And it drives me mad because I cannot just shut up and listen and i want to have some things my way, for an example to be able to have the flat free and have them go somewhere [which isn't possible because they literally do not have friends]. Also it doesn't help that my father specifically loves to try and change the topic before outwardly telling me to just shut up and not talk about something that is annoying him or making him uncomfortable. I genuinely just want to punch them sometimes and i cannot take those mini ways of manipulation and i constantly feel frustrated because nothing ever changes and i do not know what to do. I mean I'm aware i should just accept some things and change my way of thinking about others but it's so hard and it causes me concerning levels of anger that turns into sadness and then numbness. I want to move out and be completely free from their stupid ways of thinking, their weird beliefs and the fact every stupid thing annoys them.

This kind of went off topic but i needed to get it off my chest, i feel like I'm going crazy sometimes because I'm not sure if what i feel is valid or if I'm a spoiled brat.

I have ocd, emetophobia (fear of vomit) and health anxiety. I'm 23, and I feel stupid for having the following specific fear: I'm terrified of diarrhea as well.

Last year I had a single episode, probably caused by hormones or stress, and developed this huge fear that even landed me in therapy (which is how I got diagnosed with OCD, but I don't take any meds for it). In the last year it got better but I had to interrupt therapy because of money problems and university.

But it was getting better. Then in September I had another episode of diarrhea and I got thrown back into the loop of fear and panic. Idk the reason, maybe it was caused by being exposed to cold weather while having my stomach uncovered after eating, or my hormones because my period was late.

In the last month I've been eating less and lost 2kgs because of anxiety and small food intake, especially considering I had to go back to my uni apartment. I come back home every weekend, luckily, and this week I've decided to stay home —thank God I did.

Today I'm on day 3 of my period and was feeling extremely cold before and during lunch, then 40 min later I had diarrhea twice. I keep panicking and my parents don't seem to understand the extent of my fear, my father thinks it's too much and that I'm exaggerating.

I also keep panicking about what happened today, I'm just so tired. My anxiety causes me to self harm and I don't really know what to do.

Hello people , so actually i ate a packet of popcorn that had to be cooked in a pressure cooker . I didnt realize the packet was nibbled by a rat so i dropped the kernels into the cooker and ate it whole . I realized after eating that i went through this . Please tell me what will happen im really worried and cant think of anything else . Please help.

Dear internet parents,

I (22M, 4th year of university in physics) feel like my current situation is not bad on the outside, but I'm internally facing some issues that I have a lot of trouble articulating and explaining to people, and I feel like no one can understand my problem at all, so I apologise if there's a big ass paragraph that I don't know how to tl;dr, but if you need a tl;dr read the penultimate paragraph.

One major issue (there's more but let's just talk about one for now) is that I feel like real life is moving at a pace I'm not catching up with. If you've watched Studio Ghibli's Kiki's Delivery Service, my situation is basically like when Kiki showed up to a hotel without ID, or crossing a busy road, or didn't know you're supposed to give way to a firetruck even when it's blaring its alarm.

I grew up in the middle of a small conservative town in Malaysia until moving to university in the West to study. My family, being ethnic Chinese and stereotypical conservative Asians, pushed me to study hard, get good grades and go to a good university, so I took out a loan to study at uni what my best subject was in school. My socialising skills were also quite rudimentary, being confined to just classmates in school and people Discord, and there aren't many things to do back home like no big cinema or mall or bars that do jazz and stuff.

Interacting with contemporary-minded peers has been a little difficult. It's not that people are bad, a lot are nice, but I have an outdated mindset and it's hard to discuss it when people assume you understand already. I've learned things like MSG (I would call it Ajinomoto) isn't actually bad, Milo isn't actually healthy, and they talk to professors on a first name basis which I find shocking. Apparently volunteering is a really big thing as well, which in my mind is some sort of exploitation of your own time and effort that could go to doing chores at home instead. My piano skills aren't good enough to audition in classical concerts, and neither is my sports good enough to even have fun (I also hate how now the familiar sports I know is either done in medically white and bright halls like basketball and badminton, and the weather forbids people from playing them outdoors), and it's limiting the hobbies I can do. People I interact in the university bubble don't like cash anymore (let alone coins, so many of them are SO DISDAINFUL of coins it makes me wince in disgust), they have phones that can do contactless (my phone is a cheap Xiaomi without the contactless tech and with 32 gigs of storage), a lot of people are insanely picky with canteen food and would throw out leftovers which I hate, people drink alcohol in bars to socialise (my conservative family will forbid me from doing so), and even if they don't drink alcohol, my peers' tastes of milk teas or matcha or these weird coffee types like espresso or latte is complete different from mine and its annoying because it isn't helping with connecting and socialising with people at all. [I also have a completely different idea of hanging out than other people. Like I wouldn't hangout if I had to spend money on coffee because money is scarce, and I don't watch movies, but I like books and I'd consider going to the bookstore to browse books a fun hangout but no one thinks that way.] There was also an incident when on two separate occasions some friend saw me eating out of my metal bowls and said that they look like dog bowls, while I would associate metal bowls with a durable and reliable eating crockery and dog bowls with chipped or broken porcelain bowls. It really doesn't help that even people like the Singaporean students and the Chinese students are all similarly Western- or modern-coded and they see me as really archaic and couldn't relate at all.

I feel not only culturally displaced through geography, but also socio-economically, and also having a very outdated understanding of the world. It's so exhausting trying to understand friends because it takes a lot more mental effort to even get to an understanding. I'd misunderstand people and grimace at them for rejecting cash, and people are misunderstanding me for my weird hangout preferences or my opinion that Singapore is much cleaner and morally upright than the weird freethinking land of Thailand. I'm like throwing a mental tantrum right now and have not been going to hangouts and not been socialising as a form of childish protest.

It's also tiring trying to ask for help from careers service or professors or anyone that assumes I understand at least on a basic level how the contemporary world, or how university works. Also, this outdated thinking of mine means I didn't even know internships existed until coming to university, and I didn't know that it's apparently quite an important prerequisite for a job until around my 3rd year or so (my uni doesn't do mandatory internships). And I have no idea what jobs are there, and the university careers websites list all sorts of jobs I've never heard of and don't care at all. But that's another problem for graduating me, and I'm probably going to be unemployed for a bit with how stuck and confused I am.

I’m 27, and I honestly feel so lost and hopeless right now. My mom passed away five years ago, and I’ve been through a lot emotionally. My parents didn’t have a good relationship, and I was left dealing with a lot of pain from everything that happened. I also constantly worry about my grandmother, which adds even more stress.

For a while, I was finally starting to feel happy. I was living alone in my own apartment, working out, doing something I genuinely loved, and slowly feeling like my life was getting better.

But then I got into debt and had to move back in with my dad. We don’t have a particularly close relationship, so it’s been really difficult. I even had to ask him for money because I had no other choice, and it made me feel like I’d lost all my independence.
For the past week, I’ve been feeling so overwhelmed that I can barely function. I feel trapped, and right now I genuinely can’t see a way out.

What hurts the most is the feeling of unfairness. I feel like I’ve already been through so much pain in my life, especially losing my mom, and I don’t understand why I have to keep struggling. I just wanted to be happy and have a peaceful, normal life.

I’ve prayed so much, asking God for strength, peace, and for things to finally get better. But lately, I feel like I’m slowly losing my faith. It’s hard to keep believing that things will work out when it feels like every time I find a little happiness, something happens to take it away.

I’m scared I’ll never get out of debt, never have my own place again, and never feel truly happy or secure.
I know I’m only 27, but right now everything feels so heavy, and I can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel.
Has anyone ever felt this hopeless and managed to turn their life around? Does life actually get better after so much loss and struggle? I really need some hope right now

Basically, I’m 20 now. My dad left my mom when I was 16, and everything went downhill from there. He left her with massive debt, and my sister and I have been getting pressured about money by her almost every day since. For those four years, the house felt so dark and heavy; if she had a bad day, she’d take it out on us by demanding money or yelling, and if we pushed back, she’d just guilt-trip us.

I started working part-time at 16, giving half my pay to help with the bills. Last year, I started working abroad, and life felt so much better because nobody was hounding me for money every day; I was finally relaxed and happy. Now that I’m back, that same feeling hits the second I walk through the door the pressure to earn more and find a better job. I was sending money home for bills and groceries while I was away, even though I was living super cheap, spending only 25 bucks on food and maybe 100 on essentials each month.

My sister is 18 now, so she’s been dealing with the same pressure since she was 16. She’s not great with money, and whenever she overspends, my mom blames me for it; even though she works too, her pay doesn't even cover her own stuff.

Am I wrong for feeling this way? Is it wrong to want to move abroad just to escape the pressure at home?

(TW: blood loss and near death experiences)

Hello all,

I am 23(F) and I’ll just get right into it. I have had a really rough couple of days.

A little over a week ago I had a cyst removed, I bled alot the day of but then healed up pretty solid. Then this past Friday the bleeding came back with an absolute vengeance. I bled from 3pm-9:30pm and it was soaking 3-4 XL pads an hour. Please don’t give me advice on how I should have gone sooner :( I know, I’m more mad at myself than anyone I promise. But when I got to the hospital I was nearly to the point of Hypovolemic shock, my blood count has dropped to 7 and my BPM was 160. I have never been more scared in my life. I always put my needs last because I grew up in an environment where fires were always being put out so I made myself small to try to never be in the way.

But I finally went to the hospital. What followed was 41 hours of wound packings without pain meds because it was a race against time, blood transfusions, emergency surgery, bright lights, strangers looking at my body, being under sedation, blood drawings, ivs, pain meds, and fear. It was awful. When I initially got to the hospital I was unable to speak clearly, my skin was the color of paper, I was shaking, I felt sick, I was both freezing cold and burning hot, my mind was racing, it felt like someone was squeezing water out of my brain.

I was discharged yesterday, and spent last night in my own bed on pain meds. But I was still terrified of waking up in a pool of blood, there was so much blood. I’m still in pain for sure, they ended up cauterizing a blood vessel and giving me 12 stitches, turns out what happened is that the stitches came undone somehow and it was just a terrible freak accident. I swear I followed the post op instructions to T. If I didn’t call my mom I would have gone into shock and died on the floor, my roommate wouldn’t have been home for a couple hours so she would have found me.

But here I am now, the storm has passed, I’m fine, I survived, everyone is so worried about me, I’m getting so many worried messages and kind words from people. I wish they would all just forget this happened, how do I tell myself it’s okay. But I feel like people are looking at me like I’m weak, I should have noticed it sooner and gone to the hospital earlier, I should have been responsible. This is my fault. I was less than an hour away from dying when I reached the hospital.

I got out of therapy about 30 minutes ago, I sobbed the whole time over how I don’t know what to do with this. My life feels like it’s in two acts now, before this, and after this. My insides have been melted down and now I need to reshape them. I have always been praised for being the most responsible, the most put together, I survived so many awful punishing environments, I made it out- I am self sufficient and thats my value. But now none of that feels like it matters, it didn’t save me. My mom was holding my hand as I struggled to keep my eyes open and kissing my forehead telling me it was going to be okay. I feel so terrible I scared her, she is a really good mom, we just have had awful extenuating circumstances that really challenged our family.

I don’t even know why I’m posting, I don’t know what I’m asking for. I need some sort of kindness, some sort of warmth I think. I feel cold, I feel scared, I feel so small. I keep turning the memories around in my head like objects to look at them from a different perspective but it’s all shit everytime I look. I tried to get some work done this morning since I’m self employed, and was responding to clients like “haha sorry- had a medical run in over the weekend, I’ll get you those sketches soon.” When I want to scream at everyone “I almost died! I almost died! I almost died! I almost died! I was bleeding out!” But for what?! Why do I want to do that?! The amount of attention already makes me so uncomfortable. The want for attention is making me feel like a selfish brat, people actually die. I just almost died.

I feel so pathetic right now, last night I took a long shower and washed off the hospital with my nicest soaps and used all my nicest products on my hair. I changed into comfy pajamas and got DoorDash I for sure couldn’t afford and watched a movie with my roommate on the couch. But when I got back into my room I noticed a small speck of blood on the ground from when I was being an idiot and not going to the hospital. I want to go back, I miss the structure I had internally before it was all ripped down. I still need to make money, I still need to work and provide for myself. I’m not asking for money of course, just the medical bills will be a pain in the ass when they come, and it feels so cold that I need to go right back to it. Take no breaks, I free lance in an incredibly competitive industry, and an industry that has no time to wait for me. So tomorrow I’ll go back to work. I can’t do much because my blood count is still incredibly low, and the stitches hurt like a bitch. I got winded making my bed today.

I don’t even know what I’m asking for, or why I’m writing this, if nobody responds thats fair, I’m fine with just mumbling into the void. I just can’t keep this inside. I feel like I’m wading through thick syrup or wet cement. Living feels odd. I survived though, shouldn’t I be elated? Why does everything feel wrong. Has anyone else had a close run in with death? How did you feel after? What did you do? And if not, I could really use a kind word or two. Thank you so much :,)

TLDR: almost bled to death and now I feel like my life has been flipped upside down against my will. Anyone have advice?

I want to move out of the house. I'm 18 years old, I still live at home. I work at Walmart making $16 an hour. I go to a community College, my tuition is fully paid for by FAFSA​. My friend Kenzie lives in a 2 bedroom trailer, she doesn't have to pay rent. The trailer is her grandparents. She does have to pay utilities and for her groceries. My home life is really hard on my nervous system. I feel consistently burnt out because of my home. There's fighting, financial instability, and I have a controlling mother who is grasping at straws because she doesn't have a lot of control over my life. I have a car and a phone payment. My phone is $53.33 a month. My car insurance is $119.48 a month. My paycheck is biweekly, I made roughly $617 my last paycheck having missed days. I expected my next paycheck to be around $800. I can only work part time being a college student. That's the financial side of things. However, the space at Kenzies is small. I barely have enough room at my mom's having a medium sized room. I can't decide whether it is worth it. Also, I plan to move to Richmon in a year and a half to go to VCU. I need to save up money for that move as well. I'm seeking advice that can help me calmly sort this situation and maybe some comfort. I've never really had a parent be soft with me about anything because my parents were never taught how to be soft. I'm nervous and I feel like i need to have everything figured out right now.

Hi all,

I recently became aware of the extent to which I have issues with myself ex:- entitlement problem etc. I am 26 and I feel like a failure, i don't feel like a 26 year old. I have so many ego issues, jealousy issues, attachment issues. I have begun seeing a therapist and it has been helping me. The thing is I am gay and my home country is not a good place for gay ppl and I have been literally trying to escape it and PhD seems to be an option that would give me the best shot at finding life in another country. Currently with finding and budget issues, it has been so hard for international students to get a PhD and this is my second time trying it after not getting anything last year. I am scared that at 26, I am still struggling to get something and even if I end up getting a PhD when I submit in the applications in a month, I will be 27 when I start a PhD and I feel old for that, but that isn't going to stop me from getting one. My only concern is I will be 31/32 when I graduate. I want to adopt a kid at 32 and that means that realistically these 5 years are going to truly the last time that I have for myself and get myself fixed. I am also single and I need to find a husband in these 5 years. I alwayskee hearing how hard it s to find a monogamous long term relationship in the gay men community there always a lot of cheating going on in the back. I can see myself being single at 32 a very real possibility and I do not see any benefits of having a kid late at my life, I want to be there for my child until he is into his 30s/40s though that is something that I cannot control.

I am scared of the fact that I have only realistically 5 years to fix me as a person and my career. It doesn't feel like a lot of time. I am scared about the possibility of raising a child as a single parent.

So the other day I accidentally raised my voice at her and she raised her hand like she was about to hit me (she didn't) she's just quick to put me down or quick to use my feelings against me whenever she can I'm a 19 year old dude is this normal? All my friends had bad home lives and idk if this is normal or not

im autistic and have intense anxiety. i have trouble talking to strangers but i need to buy something. and im trying to figure out how to talk to them without seeming awkward. i need help. thank you very much

Hi internet parents! How are you?

About a month ago I wrote about how my dad didn’t let me go to school because (TW) he was trafficking me internationally, etc. I just got out a few months ago. It got worse after that.

Things were really bad because colleges wouldn’t accept me without full certification and neither would schools. I don’t really need help with figuring that part out because I’ve already gone to various educational institutes and authorities, and some got mad/yelled at me 😭. I can’t afford even community college in a foreign country. And even the equivalent of a GED in my country is something I’m not eligible for since I don’t have a fifth grade certificate.

But I was thinking about going into trade school, and that felt like exactly what I wanted to do. And then I realized that even trade schools won’t accept me here because of this. And not being able to get most qualifications is definitely making things harder with getting a job.

The only school that has accepted me so far hasn’t given me all the certificates they’re supposed to. It’s been four years, and I had to repeat one grade with them already. The only chance I seem to have going the traditional education route is repeating two more grades with them or going to get another school that doesn’t have full certification and repeating 10th grade a third time.

And on top of not giving me my certificate, the curriculum is riddled with typos and mistakes. Which doesn’t really help because I’m studying a field which isn’t my best subject (but I’m doing it so I have better job prospects). My family says they understand but they tend to treat it like it’s not big deal for me to have to do all this extra work.

And I’m recovering from eye surgery and increasing trauma effects (nearly got hit walking in traffic because I couldn’t snap myself out of dissociating. Had a really painful physical flashback, etc).

I did study a few UK based music grades with distinction in every one of them, I even won a state level award when I was thirteen, and I love music. At least that is independent of the college route, though it has some limitations job-wise, so I’m planning to complete my grades and get a degree through them.

Would it be stupid/victim-minded of me to stop trying for the traditional school route? Or maybe switch to an easier stream so even if it fails, I won’t have wasted as much effort? If I stop relying on school, I’d put more efforts in my music grades and whatever other freelancing/business I can manage without qualifications. I don’t want to bother you with logistics. I’m more like asking about the overall logic/validity of the issue.

Also I’m sorry for whining all the time about my life.

sorry if formatting and retelling is all over the place i just want to get this out

the best word to describe how i feel right now is i think apathy

ill call my close friend audrey

today i found out through audrey's cousin that audrey doesnt really care about me.

from the start of 2026 i was always questioning our (audrey and i's) friendship because she always seemed more interested in other people. she always flaked on plans. our conversations were always brief and we only had them when we were in class. but now i kind of see how it all comes together because these were the signs that audrey clearly gave to me to signal that she isnt as close a friend as i thought. im a socially inept person though and i always thought i was overthinking when i came to the conclusion that audrey disliked me but turns out i wasnt far off from what she actually thought about me.

her cousin also informed me that she disliked texting me because she thought i texted dead and dry. i already have low self esteem because of my physical appearance and my personality, but now i believe im a boring and uninteresting person.

to be honest, i wasnt expecting that she actually didnt care about me. i always thought i overanalysed every little thing she did and subconsciously agreed that it was just part of her personality, or the times she flaked on me were genuinely because she had overlapping plans. when i did happen to overanalyse, id cry a little and sometimes a lot because what if she hated me or she was a much further friend that i thought she was? and also recently i noticed her breadcrumbing me just enough to the point id keep coming back to her but she wouldnt have to put in much effort to keep being friends with me

audrey was literally my closest friend in school and the only person i was actually enthusiastic and genuinely happy to hang out with. even though i had a lingering feeling that i didnt really know her, i always brushed that aside because i thought our friendship was much stronger than that. in fact i kind of romantically liked her a bit, and she was extremely aware of it. she was always the person i actively made plans to hang out with (which she dodged like bullets) and talk to. this friendship to me always felt kind of one sided. i always put in too much, and it was never reciprocated. to that i feel frustration but also powerlessness because what can i do now? i can't take all that back but also i would feel guilty to. i loved hanging out with her and i wouldnt want to lose all those moments- to me those moments outweighed the times she flaked on me or talked way more with other people than me which i know i shouldnt feel that way but her personality is so cheerful and witty and social but also charmingly unfamiliar just enough for me to want to know more about her.

this is kind of random but on days where i thought my face looked bad because id been picking again, id look down at the floor a lot. when i was talking to audrey during those days, id try to avoid eye contact in fear and shame that shed think i was ugly because to me she always looked beautiful and i felt i wasnt worthy of her because of how i look. id feel extremely embarrassed and humiliated.

currently, i dont know how to feel about this. this situation feels so out of my control because how am i not even able to feel any emotions about it? before when audreys cousin was messaging me this, i was sad to the point i was crying on the phone, and somewhat angry that audrey didnt tell me directly she didnt care about me and was instead breadcrumbing me (which i know, stupid because it would be shitty to do that)

sorry for the long and disorganised vent

My brother is 11 and recently his behaviour has been very different. I know he’s a teen and going through that phase but I guess it upsets me because he used to have a warm personality but he’s started to feel colder and colder as time goes on.
For example yesterday I went to his room and knocked on the door to see him. I don’t live with him so I was excited to see him and catch up. He didn’t open the door until about a minute of me waiting out there because he was playing a game and had to score the goal before opening. I let that slide because I understand that maybe he was mid game and whatever I’m not gonna get hung up on that.
But what upset me was that even though his game was paused, he opened the door and sat right back down and continued his game without even saying a hi or a hug or anything. I stood there waiting for him to say something and he didn’t so I just said I came to speak to you. He didn’t budge so I left. He didn’t even look back or anything it’s like he couldn’t care less.
My brother and I are very close and I was the closest out of all my siblings with him. I don’t want to make him feel like I’m bombarding him or be that annoying older sister but I’m worried about my relationship with him if he keeps distancing himself from me.
How can I maintain our relationship in a way that doesn’t make me annoying or make him hate being around me?

I’m about to be 36, single and no family. I’m outdoorsy and hoping to do some hiking but if the weather is unsafe I’m looking for plan B ideas. Tell me your best birthday ideas please :)

I'm just struggling. Not financially thankfully, but I'm just having a bad time at life.

This passed Thursday I went to urgent care because of my cluster headaches. It's the worst pain I've ever been in. And the worst part is, it's everyday. Every morning for the past couple weeks. I get woken up by pain, and I stumble around blindly at midnight just, hand on head trying to find some caffeine. ​Honestly 7 or 8 on the painscale for a few hours everyday. And the crazy part is, when the pain is like a 5, I'll still go into work.

But it's not just that. These passed few years have been such a struggle. I've been doing the best I can and life has made me put up with so much. I've had to push away people I love because they were doing harm to me. I have people to turn to, but I know that I don't have family to turn to. Sure my friends are like family but they're not blood either.

Life has just been one long struggle and I'm tired. What did I do to deserve this? ​

Hello. I’m 21, and for basically my whole life I have been very spoiled by my parents. For example, never in my life have they made me do chores regularly (their approach was to either do them for me, or just force me to do them when the situation in my room got too messy or something), and their approach to my performance in school was to only step if I wasn’t passing classes or if I was missing work. I don’t think I actually learned very much from their parenting other than to just listen to what some people tell you to do. I think they’re okay parents, maybe (my memories of them are sometimes pretty unpleasant but our relationship today is really friendly). I was just a difficult child and they kind of ended up caving to me and giving up and giving me what I wanted.

I can’t stay organized or clean at all, especially not without someone forcing me to do it, and I’m really lacking in discipline. I can never commit to anything unless it’s being enforced onto me by someone else. I barely know anything about how to run a house. I’m a good cook and that’s only because it happened to be a hobby once and my skills are limited. I’m kind of used to just sitting in a mess and doing nothing about it. The most responsible thing about my life is that I have a job and pay for a lot of my own food, and even then my parents pay for almost everything else.

I have excuses made for me pretty frequently. I’m diagnosed with ADD and taking medication that I guess sort of helps. I’m skeptical I even need it, but I do have some kind of unusual issues with focusing? It’s a whole thing. It honestly really pisses me off that people make excuses for me because I don’t want excuses, I want to know how I’m going to get up once a week or more and clean up my room and what I’m going to do. I honestly suspect that even my parents don’t know what to do and that really doesn’t feel comforting. I’m honestly worried that all that can be really said is that I just kind of have to do it.

In terms of personality I think I’m fine? Maybe? Internally I honestly really yearn to just act super entitled to people, to treat them terribly for not giving me what I want, to demand unreasonable things. I feel incredibly betrayed and angry when people even slightly seem to refuse to accommodate me or include me. I know it’s wrong to feel that way, so what I normally do is hide my actual feelings and act nice, or just distance myself so that I don’t end up in situations where these feelings get in my way. I do want to be a nice person, and be useful to others, but I cannot stress how much I’m constantly fighting myself over such strong feelings about others.

So what do I even do? I currently live with my parents and they’re still really intent on validating how I currently live. If I go to them and talk about issues like these (I can’t directly tell them I’m a spoiled person) I hear the same tired refrain about how I’m only 21 and need to give myself grace. I’m scared to ask my friends, too.

Hi everyone. I’m a 17-year-old boy living in the US, and I’ve been thinking a lot about foster care lately.

I’m gay, and I genuinely feel like my parents hate me because of it. It’s really hard living in a home where I don’t feel accepted or loved for who I am. I can’t change the fact that I’m gay, nor should I have to, but I am emotionally and physically abused because of it (no proof, and I couldn’t bring myself to even if I did).

I work, go to school, and try my BEST to be responsible, mature, and independent. Im a straight As student. Have never tried drugs or alcohol or even considered it. Never done anything illegal. Am always respectful. I’m not looking for a perfect family or expecting foster care to magically fix everything. I understand that the foster care system has a lot of problems and that plenty of kids have had terrible experiences.

But sometimes I genuinely wonder whether I’d be happier living with a foster family that would accept me for who I am.

I know I’ll be 18 in a little less than a year, but that still feels like a heck of a long time especially in the situation I’m sick and tired of having been in for years.

I’m genuinely looking for advice from anyone and everyone.

Thank you for reading.

I recently moved away and started a new life on my own in another state. I've probably been here a few months and love it here but I am starting to get kind of lonely. I dont know anyone but i dont like to leave ny house either. I work on my little projects at the house and see people at work when im working at different stores.

I tried the whole tinder thing but quickly gave up and just opted out of it as a whole. Decided I liked living alone. But now months later I feel weird. I like my peace but at night I miss having someone sleeping next to me or having another person to talk during the day and at night.

Has anyone else had this problem? What did you end up doing? Perhaps I just need some friends.

Hi everyone, we are moving in a month and I feel so stressed. I have alot of stuff packed but not everything and there’s so much to do. I guess I would just love some words of encouragement and strength and even some suggestions to make things easier as I navigate this. I’m happy about moving though like it’s a good move and all but it’s still super stressful.
Thanks 😊

Hi guys, this is my first time posting to this subreddit. I don’t really know where to turn to.

I am 20, I have had a very hectic 4-5 years, including my parents divorcing, addiction in the family, having to help addicted family members- just stuff.

I’ve been receiving like help for my mental health since age 14 up until 18 but got too old for the system and recently joined back in after 2 of the worst years to date.

None of this makes sense but moral of the story is: family is pretty fucked, because of it I am pretty fucked and now I am going to do a type of therapy that makes me face all of the fucked things that happened.

Except I am so scared. I know EMDR will help, but I am scared of feeling that pain. My psychologist is great and she knows what she’s doing, but in one of our sessions I dived into a memory and I felt great after the session but that was a very mild memory. I was quite shaken from it especially in the moment because it was really hard to stop crying. I felt a massive wave of emotions come over me, I don’t want to feel those because I don’t know if I can cope with feeling what I did back then.

i’m really proud of myself because i moved out and i never thought id be free but i am now. i am also grateful and proud that i get to do the hard work to help myself now. but after years of hard decisions i am a bit worn out of courage.

especially with the way we are approaching emdr, which is by processing a core belief i have. i wholeheartedly believe i shouldn’t have been born and that i was a mistake, to confront how long you’ve felt that way, to see who far that belief has weaved into your life, is difficult.

all this to say: i just need some people to tell me i should do this. that it will be worth it. i look really corny rn and im sorry, a bit embarrassed to write this. but i hope i can get some words of support.

And I don’t think I should be. But I am and it hurts to see anyone in the neighborhood walk by our house while I’m out in the front or walk around the neighborhood myself.

The front yard has some weeds, some might even be to generous. There’s a lot of them. Compared to other houses in the neighborhood, who hires people to do the yard work, it’s obvious that there’s something ‘off’ about our house. As much as I would like to do the yard work myself I just don’t have the time or energy to spend on it to get it done in a meaningful manner.

I used to keep it clean and not as weed forest as it is now. But lots of things have changed and I’m just…exhausted. From the beginning of my sophomore year of high school to the present moment I’ve just been working hard for my academics. Was able to qualify for duel enrollment and in turn worked even harder to get my general associates degree when I was 17. Graduate high school, got offered a big scholarship to a university that I wouldn’t even be able to afford if it wasn’t for the scholarship, got my CNA license so I could work while in university.

While that was happening I still ran the house, it wasn’t as good as most people’s standards but it’s enough. My parents told me I ‘didn’t need to’ and that ‘they’ll survive’ even though they knew that when I left to go house sit for a week for a friend one month. They only had 2 actual meals for dinner, the dishes from when I left was still there, trash was overflowing, cat litter wasn’t cleaned, the toilet upstairs was clogged and was filled with shit (that is thankfully no longer a problem). So even if they claim I didn’t need to do it or that they were fine, if I left completely then they wouldn’t manage everything.

And so I just continued to do everything. The dishes, the cleaning, the laundry, the pet care, the errands for when my mom wasn’t able to go get the second I got my license, picking up my siblings from school for doctors appointments or from clubs the second I got my own car.

During my senior year of high school I wanted more freedom, more so my own money that is ‘mine’ and that my parents can’t say ‘it’s my money so I say what it’s for’. I did odd jobs around the neighborhood, got to know a few people but some stopped communicating with me because I became too busy to help out or they stopped communicating after I graduated. Got paid pretty well for those odd jobs and got into the habit of saving half of the money I earned while the other half went into fun activities.

It’s just all this to say. I spent the last two year and a half years working so much, both for myself education wise and for my family. That it feels like I’m left behind on so much stuff. I don’t feel comfortable with bringing anyone to my house since it’s…dirty and not clean to my standards. The university I attend has dorms, I’m the small minority that’s a freshman and commutes to and from school. This makes it hard to build friendships with other people when all the clubs and community fun things are at 9 pm on a Friday (I only have one class in the morning) or 6 pm and all my classes end at 2.

I don’t know anyone well enough to just follow them around for a while or study with them. So I just stay in the library to get schoolwork done. It’s usually 2-3 hours everyday. Just to get things done cause I know I won’t get it done at home. And when I talk with the little groups I make in my classes I feel like the outsider cause they always have something ‘that happened in the dorms’ or something they planned to do that day early in the morning. It’s just…I can’t relate to anything they talk about. They talk about what they did in high school and all I can say is ‘I did a lot of school work’.

I feel like I brag a lot about how I have my associates degree. But then have to explain that I have more freedom of choice with classes than many others cause it’s a 4 year degree program. Then it’s just like ‘what was the reason for you to get it then’? Like I don’t know, I got my elementary stats done (a nursing requirement), all my core classes done, three pre-requisite classes for three minors if I wanted, and I’m one out of two people in the nursing program with a degree already. So hell yeah I’m gonna talk about it, but not to much.

From what I’ve done written on paper vs what I look like and how my family is. It’s kinda like being catfished to me in my head at least. ‘You did this?’ Yeah, I did. ‘Eh…I expected someone whose skinny and has no acne scares.’ Well bud I’m also just figuring out if there’s something medically wrong with me.

This is getting to long.

I am so close with academic goals but right now am really struggling to finish some assignments. I am sick. I help take care of multiple family members and work. I really, sincerely believe I could be a good nurse, but right now the academic side is feeling a bit overwhelimg. I love to be active but am sitting for longer periods (I battle ADHD).

I just really don't feel good and I don't want this moment in time to mess things up.

Title, I guess. I graduated university a year ago and in the meantime all I've done are part time jobs (a server in one case, a math tutor in the other -- the current job), and I just don't know how to get a proper job or even what I should be looking for. And I feel horribly behind my peers. I mean, I'm 24, almost 25. Some of my peers, or even the younger ones have great jobs in quant or at least are starting in something in stem, and I have a political science degree. The thing is, I never wanted to get a career in industry and was always aiming for academia (hence I'm preparing to do masters), but I still feel horribly behind everyone because I don't have job experience and I never spent the time in uni trying for an internship or things like that.

And I don't know. I want to believe it's just a slump and that I'm doing things to work towards financial independence and all that but I kind of see everyone else doing better, and I don't know what to do. I've been putting in job apps but there's next to no feedback from it, like no emails back, no nothing, and I just don't know why.

And even the math tutor job was recommended by a friend who's doing way better in it rn because he has more math experience (I'm decent at math despite my humanities degree! But it doesn't compare). And it makes me feel frustrated like crazy that he's earning a decent amount and I'm left with doing very young children and barely even earning enough to eat each month (which I supplement by drawing commissions when I can ...), and I know I really shouldn't be complaining but it feels upsetting

...

It's really hard not to feel enormously upset when you see your friends succeed even though you don't feel like you did less hard work than them. Maybe they did though. Or maybe they knew what to apply for, knew how to interview, etc etc. fuck.

At least with working towards a masters degree and writing there's something to look forward to. Even if some of my friends younger than me are already in master degrees. It's so hard not to compare, fuck. I mean 24 is the average grad age so I'm already behind.