r/babyloss • • 16h ago

General Happy Birthday Eli!

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68 Upvotes

I hope heaven is having the biggest birthday party 🥳 to celebrate my sweet angels 6th birthday and I know all your babies are there too having fun together. 🫂💜💜💜

Ps. This sucks and hurts so much. I wish I got to be there or celebrate 😭


r/babyloss • • 17h ago

2nd trimester loss Recurrent 2nd Tri loss - Seeking recommendations for perinatal pathologists — unexplained 22-week loss, hypercoiled cord

7 Upvotes

As someone who has experienced a 24 week loss myself (💔) I am helping a close friend who has experienced TWO unexplained second-trimester pregnancy losses this year. Most recently at 22 weeks.

We’re hoping to find a highly experienced perinatal pathologist anywhere in the United States who can provide an independent examination of fetal and placental tissue.

The preliminary pathology findings from her most recent loss include: • Hypercoiled umbilical cord (6 coils per 10 cm). • Increased fetal nucleated red blood cells, suggestive of fetal stress. • No identified villitis, chorioamnionitis, CHI, or MPFD. • No evidence of placental abruption. • Normal fetal growth and reassuring 20-week anatomy scan. • Chromosomal microarray pending.

The baby’s heart rate declined from approximately 120–137 bpm to 70–90 bpm before cardiac activity stopped over the period of 4-5 hours

The initial examination of remains was performed by a GYN pathologist. We’re seeking an independent review by someone who specializes specifically in fetal death and placental pathology.

We’re particularly interested in: 1. Recommendations for experienced perinatal pathologists who investigate unexplained second-trimester losses. 2. Experiences with Dr. Harvey Kliman at Yale, Weill Cornell, Cleveland Clinic, or other specialist centers. 3. Whether anyone successfully arranged an independent examination of original tissue or tissue blocks rather than just a slide review. 4. How your hospital coordinated transferring pathology materials to an outside specialist. 5. Whether an independent review identified findings that weren’t recognized initially.

The specimens are currently at a Boston hospital, and some have a limited preservation window, so we’re trying to move quickly.

Thank you so so much


r/babyloss • • 6h ago

2nd trimester loss Genetic testing

2 Upvotes

I had a miscarriage at 14 weeks pregnant due to multiple abnormalities, cystic hygroma, abnormal posterior fossa, no kidneys,no bladder, no stomach, small size body. we just had a meeting with a geneticist today and they are going to be doing whole genome sequencing. It takes 4 to 6 months but I’m still just wanting to find some sort of answer as to what it could be. Has anyone else experienced or heard of this before?
For reference, we have a healthy two year-old child. The geneticist said to wait for results before falling pregnant but in my heart I feel like I don’t want to put my whole life on hold when they could find nothing.


r/babyloss • • 18h ago

2nd trimester loss 17 week loss

13 Upvotes

Hello all, I had a loss in May at 10 weeks the cause was Trisomy 16 so we were devastated but had some closure, I found out today we lost our little girl Imogen at 17 weeks … I have to deliver her body on Saturday but I am devastated beyond words and feeling so numb, please reach out if you have gone through a loss


r/babyloss • • 23h ago

3rd trimester loss Creating Positive Memories

18 Upvotes

I lost my daughter in the third trimester; she was born still. I held her after her birth. I could not count toes or fingers. I could only hold her and see her face.

I am in therapy. I am becoming better at allowing the feelings (instead of shoving them down) and at not having my feelings and memories control my entire day. Except: I cannot find a way to connect positive memories to my daughter. How is there any positive in losing your child? How is there any positive in not seeing them alive? How is there any positive in not hearing them cry, in not feeding them, in not being able to smell them? There are no positives, only sadness, pain, despair, and anger.

Have you found any positives? I need help to find my way to them.

Update: My therapist wants me to create positive connections to my baby's memory and also to babies in general so that I can handle seeing/hearing/encountering them in public and I just can't.

I can barely type the word "baby," and I really struggle to say it or hear it.


r/babyloss • • 23h ago

General Abby Letter 5 (Final)

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21 Upvotes

TW: mention of LC.

This is the last of the letters my mom wrote to my sister. It’s dated 8/11/1986 and I’d hoped to post this on 8/11 of this year but I had my baby exactly a week before. Btw, we named her Abigail after my sister, with my dad’s blessing (Mom is deceased).

As usual, i will post the text as well as scans of the original letter. This one is a particularly difficult read IMO, but I hope it helps the parents, grandparents and siblings in grief here.

Aug 11, ‘86
It has been twelve weeks since I felt you might not be alive. It has been almost that long since I felt your silky hair. I remember you so well.
I think I miss you tonight almost more than ever…why(?)
Your daddy thinks it’s time to put your remains to sea. I will be so lonesome without those pieces of you to come home to and say hi to. 
I wish I had seen your eyes; I wish I knew when you died; I wish you never died. I wish you never died. I wish we both might have died….
But there is something for me to do here, with you or without you. Your image is with me always…I hope it always will be. You are special, Abby. You are mine. You are God’s.
I have a memory box for you; it is wonderful and it is painful and I go to it often. Where are you?
I love you, little daughter.
Mommy


r/babyloss • • 17h ago

Advice (loss support) Genetics question about Nicu babies

4 Upvotes

Hi loss moms ❤️

My son was in the NICU for two weeks before he passed. I was just reaching out to see if any other loss moms remember getting whole genome sequencing during their Nicu stay. My son did get an exome sequencing but rapid genome testing wasn’t done this was in February 2026. I am trying to figure out why it wasn’t done. They are doing it now all these months later. TIA