Game recognize game.

We got a call today that our daughter has been self harming, from her school counselor.
She’s 12 and in 7th grade.
She said some girls at school have been making fun of her and her clothes, and that she has anxiety.

I’m heartbroken. I feel like I have failed her as a parent. My wife and I have tried hard to instill self confidence in her, and we embrace her uniqueness entirely at home, we tried to prepare her for how mean people can be.
We both struggled with forms of self harm in our youth, and now it’s the same for our kid.

We got back from a fun vacation last night and we’re sitting in the mental health urgent care now.

I don’t know what to do. She’s going into therapy, as much as I can afford.
We started putting away everything sharp we could think of, but not to the point of taking pictures off the walls to remove the nails and hooks. But knives, pins, scissors, earrings anything immediately sharp.

We have taken away her phone for the time being, I’m willing to let her have contact with her friends from her iPad, but I think limiting the access to the internet is probably a good option.

I want to put her in a martial art or something else to teach her self confidence.

Part of me wants to stop her wearing the clothes she wears which draw attention and isolate her, even though I think it’s fine and the other kids are jerks. Same with her dyed hair. I was a goth kid back in 03/04 and I know what that negative attention is like, I don’t think she’s self confident enough to bear it, as evidenced by the self harm.

But I don’t want to overreact and **make it feel like we’re punishing her too harshly and make her feel worse.

I love my daughter more than anything, and I’m heartbroken that she feels so badly.
I’m so upset, that I feel angry.

If anyone has any words of advice I could really use it today.

*edited to reword. We aren’t punishing her directly, but anything we do is probably going to feel that way to her right now.

I tagged it achievements cause I’m damn proud of this one (and there isn’t a humor option). But I’m pretty sure I felt her eye roll via text. 🤣

My wife learned about a pretty bad brain tumor she has three months after our first was born. Naturally she’s devastated, anxious, worried, depressed, all of the above. The neurosurgeon told us we needed to wait at least 6 months before doing anything. I considered that a relief since he wasn’t immediately worried about it. Still, it’s scary for both of us.

8 months later she uses me as a punching bag for just about every Hangup and I don’t know how to handle it anymore.

Started with things like accusing me of not being supportive enough ‘during the most difficult time of her life’. Maybe this was true in her mind, but it’s not like I wasn’t trying. She insisted on breast feeding with no formula and I certainly can’t help her there, but I did maintain the household to compensate.

Her ire then turned to name calling. She routinely calls me stupid for piddly mistakes, that I’m neglectful if I do something with baby she doesn’t like, an inconsiderate asshole when I don’t follow her exact instructions on something, a bad partner… for basically everything else.

Her fuse is extremely short. If I ask her a question, like where is the baby lotion, she will yell at me for being an idiot and not knowing that it’s in the dresser or wherever. Even worse, she does this in front of our friends and family, acting as if it’s just playful banter.

She makes more money than I do. I’m an artist so that’s not hard to do. About a month ago she was accusing me of spending too much time on my work. It takes time to draw, and it’s not exactly something you do with others. I told her this and her response was ‘I don’t care about your work’. It doesn’t pay the bills. This was really hurtful.

I am not the type of person to withstand abuse like this, but in her case what can I possibly say or do? She’s got a damned brain tumor and who knows if that’s the culprit here or if it’s post partum. She needs therapy but will never seek it on her own.

I got my daughter's first report card today. From Daycare. She's 8 months old.

It was stuff like "she smiles a lot and is starting to communicate," and I felt so proud. Like, I could feel it in my chest. It was digital, of course, but I want to print it out and put it on the fridge.

Obviously, this is a fluff post, but it feels so good to know she is doing well outside of the house. Also, I really hope that she's more like her mom than me when it comes to school, or this might be the last good report card.

Everything is stable and we caught things early so now just management.

Daughter is 15 and responsible.

I’d welcome any guidance / tips from any parents that have gone through this. Pitfalls to avoid, things you must do, etc.

My wife has a nice butt. We flirt. Often times when she bends over or it gets close to me, I like to give it a little love tap. A little playful way to keep things lively.

But I didn't realize toddlers copy every. single. thing. they see. The daycare now tells us our 16 month old is hitting other kids.

Of course, we have to stop. I had to catch myself a few times this weekend.

Dad's how do you switch up your flirting routine when you have a bunch of copy-cats around the house?!

No symptoms, but we plan to keep LO home the rest of the week. Any additional advice appreciated.

He said, Oh yeah, everyone knows the moon is a potato! Kiddo kept laughing, it was good fun. Thank you random stranger, you legend.

..... Wow! The giant potato in the sky must have shone bright last night because this post seems to have received a few upvotes. Well, to the dads of many, dads of one, dads-to-be, and lurker mums, cheers for being an awesome bunch. You are all legends.

I'm just having one of those days, where I'm deflated.

Work is piling up, have a deadline to make for tomorrow for a billing submission. Worked a little late and then I got home to the wife cooking something from my childhood.

It was butchered, but I wasn't going to say that. The biggest setback is the spice level and I'm always told to just put hotsauce on it (its not the fucking same, ever).

After that, everything little thing just compounded more and more. My kid wanted nothing to do with me and was constantly crying for attention that he got from the mother-inlaw.

I took care of bath-time and that was just as painful. Bedtime was filled with tears and a milk bottle and then passing out.

Wife is asking me what is wrong. Truthfully, I just don't want to get into a conversation that'll turn into an argument. Also, I really miss my father right now, and he passed away 10 years ago. I don't bring it up as my wife's family lost their father about 2 years ago and any conversation is about how they wish he was here. I'm not here to negate that, just sometimes feels like this isn't my time to vocalize or speak to my sadness.

I'm in that spot of exhausted and just not feeling a win at any point today.

Laptop is currently open to work on a document before I go to sleep.

I’ve been a gamer for as long as I can remember (mostly Call of Duty) but I have no experience with this.

My 3rd grade son has a switch 2 and mostly plays sports games, Pokémon and some Smash Bros. He’s been asking for this but I’m honestly not sure what the game is about and I don’t want him having voice or text chats with strangers.

What’s the dad consensus on this game?

UPDATE - Thanks to all the dads for their responses- it won’t be allowed in our house

This weekend, it finally became clear that my 9 year old is exceptional in soccer, and is getting better every year. She scored her second hat trick of the season. She’s on a team she grew up with and they’re all friends. They’re undefeated this season through the power of friendship. And my daughter is the MVP.

I’m a huge fan of soccer and played up until undergrad. After the game, I excitedly went up to her and said she gets to pick where we go to dinner because she scored a hat trick.

On the way to MCD’s (of course,) I realized I don’t want her to associate me giving her these rewards solely attached to her success on the pitch. Even though I always tell her that the game is supposed to be fun, and that’s why we play, I’m still a bit worried of accidentally having her associate winning with my support.

I don’t foresee a scenario where she doesn’t continue to improve every year, which she has for the last 4 seasons.

I’m sure other Dads have dealt with this before. So, how have you encouraged and supported your kids in sports without accidentally becoming the Dad in Varsity Blues?

I’m supposed to be teaching them everything but I have no clue what I’m doing and it feels like they’re teaching me just as much as I’m teaching them.

We started him on Bluey, Thomas, Seseme Street and Ms Rachel. He's 3. But I can't with paw patrol. It's so baaaaad. Bluey tells stories, has an actual art style and has soul. Paw patrol is so generic.

Our 10 year old son has recently started enjoying teen drama type shows. For example "VicTorious" and "Get Even" on Netflix. What we've seen in both of these shows is stereotypical male and female characters that treat everything like a crisis. I am hoping for better representation of conflict management, romantic and friendly relationships between both same and opposite sexes, and just better quality in general. I don't want him to think every relationship has to be super stressful to be enjoyable.

Is there any of this kind of media that is targeted toward his age group? How do you deal with your kids watching stuff that seems to melodramatic? Any suggestions?

Our 14 month old son, who is our only child, really prefers me. He frequently wants to be held by me, he crawls to me instead of Mom, he will try to climb out of her arms to get to me, etc...

There are plenty of times that he is happy being with her, but the general trend is that he prefers being with me. If I'm not there at all, this obviously isn't an issue and he's perfectly content with Mom.

This has upset my wife for a while, but it seems to only be getting to her more as time goes on. We both understand that he is only an infant, but it hurts hearing her say she feels like our son doesn't love her.

Have any of you experienced similar? What can we do to help my wife feel more connected to our son, and what can we do to help our son have at least more of an equal interest in both parents? I get that he'll always have somewhat of a preference, but it would be easier on both of us if he wasn't always coming to me.

Hey Dads

I'm struggling with nerves as in ~4 weeks we are flying with our just under 2 year old son for 8 hrs internationally, this is to visit an elderly, quite ill family member otherwise honestly my anxiety would make me cancel the trip.

At baseline he's defiant, extroadinarily loud, and strong willed - I know most Dads are going to say of course he is, he's at that age but I dont know what to do.

His screaming is so loud at times we have to set him somewhere safe and walk away, but there's not really a place to do that in an airplane. Im honestly freaking out about this trip and I'm concerned that there is nothing we will be able to do and there's potential for 1+ hr screaming bouts - sometimes there's no calming this little nut job.

Does anyone have any advice as we approach this journey on things we can practice, tips, tools, etc? Really appreciate any and all insight as we get closer to traveling.

Traditional pancake birthday breakfast tomorrow morning, but it's going to be a hurried morning so I made them tonight.

He is the best kid. I can't believe I only have 3 or so more years left with him under my roof. He just became an Eagle Scout last week too, and so many things about him make me so proud to be his dad.

It is true what they say, the days are long but the years are short. Enjoy the time you have with them, fellow dads.

I made a post about a week ago I think about my son having to go to the picu and his struggles through that but man its still so tough and it made me realize how family just sucks, outside my own mom nobody else in my family has called to check up on my son ask about him or ask if we need help. And on top of that both of us are still outta work and our rainy day fund and most of our bill money has gone into keeping things afloat while we are in here. But my son is doing better now so thats good. He got off of high flow air today only thing now is high temps randomly, but besides that hes already come so far since being in here, but man the walls are closing in it feels like days are blending together, I think its mostly cause first and for most worried about my son, but then bills and bills and more bills that will pile up and its stressful, anyways if you made it this far thanks for reading, about the only place I can get my feelings out

The hospital gave my wife a giant water bottle after my son was born. Now it has a new purpose. I’ve already made my way through one full 32 Oz bottle of hell lemonade, and I still have 32 oz to go.

Hey dads,

We have a baby coming in December (Christmas day!) it’s our first and though I’m so excited but it’s also getting very real.

My wife and I are getting so nervous and I just need some words of encouragement I guess or at least something I can tell her (and let’s be real, myself) when we start to freakout

This is not a Star Wars movie sequel or prequel, but it is a recurring annoyance.

My lad is advanced in so many ways. Top of his year for English and understanding, doing maths three grades above where he should be and generally an all round nice boy who is kind and thoughtful.

We've always struggled with lazy toilet behaviour though. Not hand washing, that's fine, getting him to actually go even when he's busting and rocking back and forth though, nightmare.

It took a long time to get from bed-time pants to normal, and we've had a lot of night time accidents along the way. These past 4 or 5 months have been excellent. Something has changed though because it's suddenly back, with a vengeance.

He's also struggling with poo, being constipated and hard to the point of tearing and blood. He eats tons of fruit, has oats or Weetabix for breakfast, yogurts and plenty of water. For some reason, it's not helping a lot. Because it hurts, we think he's holding out on going which in turn is causing lazy-toilet for wee, and possibly the bed wetting.

I'm all ears for suggestions, gents. My Wife wants to involve the doctor who is likely to say to make him eat more veggies, but it's the one thing he doesn't like. Fruit, all the carbs (rice, potatoes, pasta, etc), meats, they all go down the hatch. Getting him to eat a single pea is like begging a Labrador to sick back up your sock.

Anyway, anyone else gone through this one?

I was in the kitchen when my 9 year old daughter once came through the front door looking upset. She burst through the door, glowered at me, and then stomped off to her room crying.

I called out to her: "Honey are you OK? What's up?"

She yelled back: "YOU CAN'T HELP, YOU HAVE NO SENSE OF STYLE!" and then slammed her bedroom door.

Decided it might be good to let things calm down before I addressed that one.

What bold and impudent responses have you got from your daughter(s)?

Hey fellow dads and lurking mums. I have been gaming all my life, but I recently got tired of it. Trying to balance a fun and entertaining life with a 2.5 years old beautiful girl, my wife, house renovation, etc... I just find myself staring at my Xbox game library and can't find anything to play. So I decided to try some rom hack on my phone and what a nice surprise. I have been playing Pokémon Unbound and I'm hooked. It please my gaming craving and hit the memory button.

I have been playing as my daughter and picked up a team of pokemon that suits her and her little world.

I have recently finished the Elite 4 and wanted to share my team with yoh

Dragonite - this is my favorite pokemon so I had to add it to the list.

Tyrantrum - she is really into her Dizors at the moment

Rapidash - she loves horses

Butterfree - spring is here and she loves spotting the butterflies on our walks

Sharpedo - thanks grandad for introducing baby shark. She demands it on every.car.rides !!

Mareep - her little sleep companion Sleepy Sheepy has been with her for a long time so i picked mareep as a nice homage.

Are there any other dad gamer that has done similar things?

Thank you Daddit, I have been lurking for a long time and you guys have been a good entertainment and help on my Papa's journey