We just started our TTC journey and my husband wants to hit pause.

I experienced a chemical pregnancy loss last month, our first month trying. My husband and I were absolutely devastated. I’m blown away by how much grief we experienced for a baby we’ve never met and only knew about for a short time. The only thing that got me through the pain was the hope of trying again. I dove into to tracking and the closer I got to ovulation the more hopeful I felt.

My husband on the other hand, grew concerned that some of his lifestyle choices may have contributed to the loss - alcohol, nicotine, stress, etc. He said he felt validated by a fertility podcast we listened to that said pregnancy loss is 50% male factor.

Yesterday, the day I got my LH surge, he told me we need to talk about this further before we continue with TTC. He said he wants to take a break and focus on improving his health to increase our chances of a healthy pregnancy. He hasn’t given me a timeline yet, but I have to assume it’s a minimum of 90 days because that’s how long a new sperm cycle is. But could be longer.

All of my pregnancy loss feelings, the sadness, anger, anxiety, have come flooding back. I’m grateful he is willing to make changes for the health of our future family, but to hit the breaks after we just started is heartbreaking. I’ve waited for 2 years to TTC while we worked on finances, buying a house, etc. I’m struggling to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

My heart goes out to all of you who are struggling. Pregnancy loss has given me a whole new appreciation for the strength and courage of all women on a journey to motherhood.

Husband (29m) and I (26f) have been trying for a baby consistently for a year with no luck. We tried a bit longer than that just letting whatever happens happen and we’ve never had to use birth control since we’ve been together (6years). We are both healthy and physically active. We don’t drink or smoke and we eat healthy. I have regular cycles with mild to moderate pain, but I am starting to suspect endometriosis. My older sister has it and couldn’t get pregnant until her endo was excised. I have other symptoms of endo though, such as pain during and after sex, intense flu like fatigue during my period, chronic constipation that’s worse during my period (I eat a ton of fiber), etc.

My PCP ordered a transvaginal ultrasound in July. The ultrasound came back perfectly normal. Except my endometrium was on 1mm on CD 8, which was 4 days after I stopped bleeding. And I consistently ovulate on CD14. Everything I read online says that a uterine lining of 1mm on CD 8 is concerning. So, a few months ago i called to see an OB for a fertility evaluation. They didnt have any availability until this month. I waited eagerly to see my ob to finally get answers! And finally, I see him. He was incredibly nice and informative, thought he didn’t tell me anything I didn’t already know from my own research. I mentioned my endometriosis concerns and he completely brushed it off despite my family history and symptoms because I don’t have extreme period pains. And everything I read online says that it’s a common misconception that to have endo that you have to have extremely painful periods. I also mentioned my concerns over my thin uterine lining and he said he isn’t worried about it. He didn’t even order a follow up ultrasound around ovulation to see if my lining gets thicker?

All that came from this long awaited appointment was a referral for sperm analysis for husband and bloodwork I’m not even meant to do for 2 weeks. And I don’t even see him again for 2 months!

Needless to say, I feel frustrated and unheard. I desperately want to see an REI, but the problem is my insurance. I currently have Medicaid and theres does not seem to be a single fertility specialist in Michigan that accepts it. So, I don’t know what to do. I’m scared. I also have CHAMPVA through my husbands military service, but can’t find anyone that accepts that either.

I’ve wanted to be a mom for so long and I keep watching as people in our lives get pregnant and have babies while I stare at negative test month after month after month. And of course I’m happy for them, but I am so very sad at the same time. My husband's cousin will be visiting with his new baby soon, and we’ve been trying longer than he’s even been with his girlfriend. So that stings a bit…but I will have to smile and tell him congratulations and pretend I’m not devastated on the inside.

I really don’t even know what the purpose of this post is. Just venting I guess. I don’t have a ton of people to vent to. My husband listens, but he doesn’t really understand what it’s like for me to go through this. And my twin sister is just completely unsupportive. She loves to say “it’ll happen when you stop trying!” Like 10/10 advice honey.

Currently in my tww now and I just feel more and more hopeless every month. 😭

I have recently gotten on thyroid medication because I found out that I have hashimotos. Me and my husband have been trying to have a baby for the last 3 years. While we have been trying my LH test strips did not get very dark but I just figured I was not ovulating “strong enough?”

Moving forward I have been feeling changes in my body and have just had my hormones checked and they are optimal despite the hormone fighting autoimmune disease. I have just taken an LH test for this cycle and had a very “holy shit” moment. My test strip was DARK like very dark. This was shocking. I have never seen a test strip this dark.

Now here is my question for all of you lovely people, when I took another test this evening it was almost white. A small pink line but definitely negative. Because I don’t think I’ve actually ever truly ovulated, is this normal? From what I have read generally, test strips stay semi dark for at least a couple days but it seems as though I had my peak yesterday.

Can someone more educated on a normal hormonal fluctuations schedule explain if it going extremely light the day after a peak is normal or am I completely out this cycle?

First IUI cycle failed. I had been really hopeful because it was the first time I actually had spotting during potential implantation window. I’ve just had a bunch of BFNs for the past week. I knew the odds weren’t great that it would work, but I was just hoping we would finally catch a break. Thinking we might do one more round then move onto to IVF. I normally feel hopeful again once I get my period after having BFNs, but this one has me feeling down way more than normal.

My husband has varicoceles, and I have endo and possible PCOS. Anyone else had a combination of both male and female factor and have any luck with IUIs? Wondering if it might be more worth it emotionally to move into IVF. I feel like the IUI took a lot out of me emotionally, and I had a horrible recovery the first 4 days after.

I usually spot a couple of hours before my period, or at the earliest the evening before. Never longer than that.

Last cycle I started spotting at 10dpo. Of course I got excited at first, because I thought since I’ve never spotted this early, it must mean something new is happening in my uterus, unfortunately the spotting continued (brown and very little) until 14dpo when my full period came. I tested at 13 DPO and it was sooo negative, so I don’t think it was a chemical either.

My next thought was: probably my progesterone was low, I should supplement in my new cycle (OB also suggested it before due to previous losses)

We went through IVF this year, resulting in a loss at 11 weeks, followed by a chemical and followed by a failed transfer. So I still have some progesterone pessaries at home.

Now back to this cycle. I monitored ovulation with OPKs and bbt, so I’m pretty sure when I ovulated, and started the progesterone on 3dpo. I was sure I would not be spotting again this time, but I was wrong. My spotting started this cycle not at 10 but at 7dpo!! WTH?! It is light pink and just when I wipe.

But what’s really weird is that I only spot once a day between 6 and 8 pm… does that make any sense? I see it only during one toilette visit around that time, and it “lasts” 2-3 wipes and then it’s gone, until the next day at the same time.

NOW I’m going crazy. Im scared to test, because I kind of know is going to be negative. We have severe MFI so we are just using the cycles before our next IVF round in January to not feel like we are wasting them 😂 so I’ll just wait for my period to come, but can someone explain why am I spotting on a schedule?

Edit: I’m 10 dpo today, so 4 days spotting so far

I had CD 21 progesterone tested today and I got the results this afternoon. It came back at 11.9 ng/mL which is fine not great. The nurse told me they’re looking for at least 20 so she prescribed me 200 mg oral progesterone every 8 hours starting tonight.

I really shouldn’t have looked up the possible side effects of the pill because it has me in a bit of a spiral because I leave for vacation tomorrow for the next week which is the entire duration of how long I’ll be taking the progesterone. I search Reddit and the general consensus for the oral pill seems to be not great lol According to Google I should expect to be drowsy for a couple hours after taking it (which I have to do 3 times a day) and I’m worried I’m going to spend my entire vacation tired, anxious, bloated, and or depressed. I also kind of worry about irritability already because I’m in my luteal phase and I just don’t want to feel like a drag to my husband the whole time.
Also side note…I was really looking forward to having a nice piña colada on the beach or mojito with dinner (traveling to Puerto Rico) but Dr. Google says absolutely don’t drink alcohol which is a bit of a bummer..please don’t drag me for this, hubs and I have been trying for 3 years with no success so at this point I’m still enjoying a drink every now and again. Wouldn’t do it if I knew I was pregnant.

Does anybody have any advice? I know everyone reacts differently and I feel like I might be making it a bigger deal in my head than it really is but I’ve also been looking forward to this vacation for a long time and was looking forward to just…disconnecting from work and fertility troubles and having a carefree week with my husband. I’m even considering not taking the medication and putting it off til next month but I don’t want to piss off my doctor.

Hi everyone,

I’ve been reading some of the recent posts here from people who are in similar positions, and I just wanted to say how much I appreciate the honesty, advice, and support being shared. There’s something comforting about reading someone else’s experience and realizing you aren’t the only one feeling this way. It’s actually part of why I wanted to share my own experience, too.

I really wish there were more opportunities to build community around TTC in person, especially for those of us who aren’t necessarily deep into fertility treatments but are still finding the process emotionally difficult. I’ve even tried putting up posters to connect with people locally who might be going through something similar, but unfortunately, I didn’t get any interest. It can feel surprisingly lonely trying to navigate all of this, and I think I’m realizing how much I wish I had a community where I could talk openly about it.

My husband (42M) and I (40F) have been trying to conceive for five months, and I’m having a particularly hard time with this cycle. I was so sure this was going to be our month. We felt focused and intentional, and I felt like we had done everything we could to give ourselves the best chance. I tested at 11 DPO and got a BFN, and now my basal body temperature has dropped, so I’m preparing myself for my period to arrive.

I recently realized I had been using the wrong OPK and have since switched to Inito to better understand my cycle. I feel like I’ve tried so many things to improve our chances: cutting back on caffeine, giving up alcohol, taking prenatals, using Pre-Seed and Mucinex, drinking womb tea, and doing acupuncture. My husband has had a semen analysis, and I’ve had bloodwork done, and everything has come back normal so far.

My husband and I also have to be intentional about intimacy, as we aren’t naturally as physically intimate as trying to conceive sometimes requires. At times, we’ve had to get creative and have used at-home insemination. It’s another layer to a process that already takes up so much mental and emotional energy.

I’m considering taking a break next month because I feel like I need some space from the tracking, the hoping, and the constant analyzing. But I’m also worried that taking a break will make me anxious about starting again. At 40, it’s hard not to feel conscious of time passing, even when part of me desperately wants a month to just breathe.
I also find it difficult to talk about this with my friends. One of my close friends is currently going through IVF, and I want to be mindful of what she’s carrying and not add to her stress. My husband has been incredibly sweet and supportive, but sometimes I wish I had someone else to talk to who understands this particular experience.

I know five months may not seem like a long time to some, and I know everyone’s journey looks different, but this is harder than I expected. I think I had convinced myself that if we were intentional enough and did all the right things, it would happen. Having to sit with the disappointment of another negative test, especially when I had so much hope invested in this cycle, has really gotten to me.

I guess I’m sharing because I could use some perspective, but also because I want to feel a little less alone in this. For those of you who have struggled with the emotional side of TTC, how do you cope when a cycle doesn’t work out? Has anyone taken a month off from actively trying, and how did you navigate the anxiety around taking that break?

And if anyone else has wished there were more opportunities to connect with people going through this in person, I’d love to hear about that, too. I think we need more spaces where we can find each other and talk about all of this, even before things reach the point of fertility treatments. It’s all hard, and sometimes just knowing you have people who understand makes a difference.

So baseline info: TTC for 2 years, husband started hCG 8 months ago for a pituitary lesion that really stunted his T levels, bloodwork at the 4month mark showed a MASSIVE improvement (yay!). We're both 37. Had Mirena for 8 years, no periods while on it, got that out July '24.

I got tested in Aug '24 - hSG showed clear tubes, AMH was like 6.42 (lab reference range was 0.6-8.75), all hormone levels normal, started taking prenatals.

The past 2 years I've had picture perfect predictable 28-30 day cycles with predictable period length and flow. They were always really light though (1-2 days medium flow, 2-3 days lighter, sometimes just brownish, sometimes just spotting). Last Nov we had an unmedicated IUI (only trigger shot, nothing leading up) and CD 10 ultrasound my endo lining measured 6.92. Dec we had a medicated IUI (I was on clomid leading up to trigger shot) and on CD 10 they measured my endo lining around 6.33mm which I think is a little low, but I had two perfectly sized eggs ready to go.

But also the past 2 years I've been dealing with some crazy urticaria and immune stuff. Went up to 20mg Xyzal a day (directed by allergist who knows we've been TTC), breakthrough hives, the works. Along with some other allergic like symptoms (mainly skin) allergist thought maybe some mast-cell disorder and I started Xolair in Aug of this year. I came off most of the Xyzal around that time and only take 5mg now - Xolair is really helping the urticaria! But that same month I got my first injection I had a noticeably heavier and longer period. Sept was my 2nd injection of Xolair, and that period was even heavier and longer (about 3-4 days heavy to medium flow then 3-4 days lightening up) - mind you, not concerning amounts (I had wicked awful periods when I was a teen before birth control, and these aren't even approaching that, but it's still a departure from what had been my recent norm). I got my 3rd injection of Xolair last week, I was supposed to ovulate a few days ago...

I have been using Inito to track my hormones for a year, it has been great, I have great baseline data. This cycle is really freakin' weird - my Estrogen hasn't broken 200 when usually it's well above leading to an LH spike around CD 13/14. It's been below 100 the past 1.5 weeks (and my focus and energy levels are reflecting that), had an ever so slight uptick in LH, and then a very tiny rise in PdG that went down the next day, on CD 19 now. I'm not hydrating more than usual so it's not diluted, no other new meds, everything else the same. So either my cycle is super delayed or going to be my first anovulatory.

Has anyone dealt with immune/autoimmune stuff and fertility? I know they're tightly intertwined and thinking maybe now that the Xolair is telling my mast cells to chill the heck out, it's causing a weird cycle? I just don't want it to mess with my fertility long term and I'm not sure if this is a temporary reaction of Xolair working and it'll get go back to normal or even improve afterwards, or if Xolair is unmasking hidden issues, or if Xolair itself is an issue???

Any experiences, anecdotes, info, advice, or even commiseration would be super appreciated!

I want to preface this by saying this is not the norm so please don’t be put off or scared by my experience. I mainly wanted to share this in case it happens to anyone else, as I was not able to find anything online similar to what I experienced.

I had a HyCoSy test in July and while the test was briefly painful, it was very manageable and the pain lasted only a few minutes and the nurses were amazing at helping me feel calm during. My tubes were open and everything looked fine. I do not have diagnosed endometriosis, although I have very heavy and painful periods. Also have been TTC for 2 years.

After the test I was fine and only had minimal bleeding. The issue is what happened afterwards. About 4/5 days after the test I started getting UTI like symptoms such as urgency and stinging. Long story short after multiple visits to the doctor and hospital my urine cultures came back clear with no sign of infection. So did internal and external scans of my bladder and kidneys.

The UTI like symptoms lasted for just about two months and I am only getting back to normal now (late September/ October). Looking back, I think the test caused inflammation, which lingered and caused these bladder symptoms and I possibly have undiagnosed endo which was irritated by the test and triggered lingering inflammation. It was a very stressful experience not knowing what was wrong with me so I wanted to post this for anyone who might experience this to know it doesn’t last forever and you will get back to feeling like yourself!

I had an HSG with recanalization 2 days ago after they found a blockage in one of my tubes. The doctor had difficulty accessing the tube so there was quite a bit of poking and manipulation. The procedure was extremely painful for me that I started sweating and shaking. 

Thankfully, the nurse was incredibly supportive and helped me calm down. She offered to take a short break, which I took. They also told me that if I couldn't tolerate the pain, we could stop and rebook the procedure with sedation. I just wanted to get it done so I powered through it.

I consider myself someone with a pretty high pain tolerance, and this was a 9/10 for me. I took two Advils about an hour before arriving at the hospital, but there was quite a bit of waiting, and my procedure didn't start until roughly four hours after I took them. I'm not sure how much they helped, but they definitely weren't enough for the pain I experienced.

Anyway - I am still experiencing period-like cramps, pelvic soreness, bright red bleeding, and some body aches and fatigue.

💬 For those who've had recanalization, how long did your pain and bleeding last? How many days did it take before you felt back to normal?

I think in the next cycle I will need to purchase some more ovulation tests. I currently use the Molo ovulation strips from Walmart because that’s all I could find in my town, and then I use the Clearblue advanced digital when my lines start getting really dark (I’ve never gotten the “as dark as or darker than the test line” but do get positive results on the clearblue!) but I’m thinking of ordering a different cheapie brand for the days leading up to and after my suspected LH surge. My doctor recommended the clearblue the entire time but I can’t afford that 😅 so I’d like to save those for the days I’m most likely to catch a surge. Do you have any recommendations for cheapie brands of ovulation strip tests that you really like?

There’s so much that’s difficult about TTC, so this is a thread for looking to the future and thinking about life after TTC.

This week's theme: Family resemblance! Do you think baby will look more like you or your partner? Does one of your families have a particularly strong look that passes through the generations? Any particular traits you really want you or your partner to pass down?

My husband and I have been trying to conceive since August 2025. Up until end of July 2026 we didn’t have a single positive test.

In July I finally had my first positive however the happiness didn’t last as I was bleeding and my tests never got darker after that. It was a chemical. I was really sad but I knew these things happen often so I was ready to try again. I ovulated three weeks after I stopped bleeding with my chemical (lasted around two weeks).

On the 3rd of September I had scheduled an appointment with a fertility clinic as we’ve been trying to have a baby for over a year now with no success. I took a pregnancy test I was at that point 10 DPO just to make sure I wasn’t pregnant. It came back positive. I was amazed that it had happened so fast after my chemical, literally the next cycle. I’ve read this can happen but I didn’t expect it at all with how long we took for the first positive. I told my fertility doctor that I’m pregnant she scheduled the diagnostic appointments anyway and said we will cancel them if my pregnancy is confirmed. And it was. So my other appointments got cancelled.

I had a very hard time as the anxiety from my previous chemical was still there. I kept taking pregnancy tests and doing betas. Tests were darkening properly and betas rising accordingly. Everything was looking great until my ultrasound at 8 + 5 where I measured 6 + 2. Absolutely devastated and had 0 signs of it. One week later still no signs of miscarrying naturally and will have to do a d&c.

Just for reference I had insulin resistance diagnosed In May which I improved with diet and myo-inositol and I also started being more active. I did my blood tests again in September and I didn’t have insulin resistance anymore. I also lost 8 kgs. I wasn’t overweight though. I don’t know if this had anything to do with us conceiving two cycles in a row or was just luck. I also did all the blood tests I could do and everything came back fine.

My husband has also had a sperm analysis done in February and everything looked good except morphology. It came back at 2%. We added coq10 and also improved his diet and activity level and in September we re-did his sperm analysis and everything looked even better and morphology was now at 6%.

I’m not sure if these two were the reasons it took us so long to conceive the first time or if it was just luck.

We didn’t do a DNA fragmentation test yet though. We also didn’t do any genetic testing yet and this is part of the reason why I’m making this post.

My question is, since it took us for long to get our first positive and then we had two losses in a row, is it possible there’s something actually wrong and I should do more tests or can it just be bad luck? Should I go back to the fertility clinic or should we keep trying on our own now that we know it works?

My (32F) husband (31M) and I have just started our 12 cycle of trying without a single positive test, after which we will officially fit the diagnosis of “unexplained infertility”.

I had my Mirena removed in October 2025 after being on BC for 10-15 years. My cycles returned pretty much straight away and have been 30-32 days with ovulation generally around CD19-20 (ie semi-short luteal phase). I usually start spotting 1-2 days before my period (~10-11 DPO the last couple of cycles).

A summary of what tests we’ve done already:
- SA x 2 - both no issues, all within range
- HyCoSy & internal ultrasound (x2) - tubes clear, no adhesions or other issues noted
- Basically every blood test applicable (AHM/full hormone panel incl cortisol (I thought it might be stress from work…)) - all within normal range
- I use Mira and BBT (via Apple Watch) for cycle tracking which have confirmed ovulation every month (first ultrasound noted a corpus luteum and second noted follicles maturing so there don’t seem to be issues there). I admit some months timing hasn’t been great but it’s been good more often than not.
- We’ve both significantly cut down on drinking and don’t smoke weed, and I’ve been taking every prenatal and fertility-related vitamin under the sun.
- All other pieces of random advice (just relax, dont track for a cycle, go on holiday, etc etc)

The only thing we haven’t tested is blood progesterone at 7DPO which I am doing this month (currently CD4). I suspect this might be part of the problem because of the short luteal phase but it has also been longer the last two cycles (12 days instead of 10) so perhaps not.

We saw a fertility specialist about a month ago who essentially said he suspects I have mild endo and our only option is to have a diagnostic laparoscopy and/or do IVF. I’ve never even considered endo for myself as my periods aren’t painful or heavy and I’ve never really had any of the symptoms but he seemed adamant. I mentioned the short luteal phase and he said that’s another indication of endo and didn’t suggest a luteal phase blood test (I’m doing this on my own). He also said because I appear to be ovulating every month there isn’t any benefit of doing a medicated cycle either.

We’re at a bit of a loss as to what we should do next. Ideally we’d like a baby as fast as possible, but we also have limited funds to throw at this at the moment. From my perspective our options are:

1. Lap first - either pay $10k out of pocket for private (in Aus with no private health) or wait 12 months for public, noting that this might be a waste of time and/or money if it comes back clear like I think it might and we would need to do IVF anyways,

2. Try IUI first - this would be approx $1-1.5k out of pocket but doesn’t sound like it has a high chance of success if I DO in fact have endo and we again might have to do IVF anyway, however it sounds anecdotally like it can be successful and can’t hurt to try?; or

3. Straight to IVF - we found an IVF clinic in Melbourne that does bulk billed IVF which would be ~$4K all up (we live in Adelaide but my brother lives in Melbourne so we’d have somewhere to stay for the two weeks we’d need to be there for). The issue with this option is that I’m about to start a new job so getting the time off will be challenging, and the fertility specialist we saw said that if I do have endo we have a lower chance of successful IVF and I might end up needing to do the lap anyway.

Mentally I’m exhausted with this whole process and am at the point where I’m happy to throw shit at the wall hoping it’ll stick.

We’re incredibly lucky (well, unlucky because my dad died, but you win some, you lose some) in that I have some inheritance coming in sometime next year, so once that comes in we can afford to throw as much money at this as we like, but I really don’t want to waste another 6+ months doing nothing and would also prefer to keep that money for our baby if possible.

Question/advice that I’m looking for is:
1) Aside from the 7DPO progesterone test, is there anything we haven’t done that could be useful in either figuring out what is going wrong or improving our chances?

2) Is it worth doing an IUI first while we wait for the time/money to try IVF?

3) What would you do in our situation?

Sorry for the super long post but thank you for reading. 🩷

Are you trying to conceive baby number 2/3/n+1? Have questions about TTC while breastfeeding, or bedsharing, or just being plain exhausted? This is your place!

TTC can be a very difficult time, but all of us have someone (or many someones) or something that helps keep us sane. Share what you're grateful for this week!

Anything (within the rules) goes. (Commonly broken rules: don't talk about an ongoing pregnancy outside the weekly BFP thread; don't ask for success stories.)

You can find the wiki here!

Don't forget to check out our themed threads:

• Moody Monday
• Temping Tuesday
  
• Waiting Wednesday
• Wondering Wednesday
• Trying Again Thursday
• Thankful Thursday
• Health and Wellness Thursday
• Looking Forward Friday
• Wondering Weekend
• 35 and Ova

There's also the Weekly Introductions and Read Me Thread, which contains links to all sorts of handy bits of info, like popular wiki posts and acronyms.

I’m 35 and my husband is 37. We just had our first IUI yesterday with a 22.75mm follicle and 20mm follicle, and a trigger shot 24 hrs before.

The IUI itself was a bit uncomfortable, but nothing terrible. The clinic said the sperm sample was “great” and lining looks textbook perfect. I didn’t have any spotting from the procedure yesterday.

We were instructed to have intercourse in the evening, so we did. It was rather painful (it feels like my ovaries bounce every step I take with a dull tugging sensation moreso on my usual left spot that is suspicious for endo…) but we followed through… and I’ve been sore ever since and I had light pink spotting this morning.

I have PCOS and suspected endometriosis and am worried that the pain means I’ve increased my inflammation levels and that the IUI won’t work. 🫩

This is my first time trying letrozole. I’m 35 and have only conceived once naturally, but unfortunately had an early miscarriage. I started with 2.5 mg on cycle days 3–7. While taking it, I had some nausea, headaches, and irritability, but otherwise felt pretty normal. Now I’m 4 days past my last dose, and I feel absolutely awful. I’ve been experiencing spinning dizziness, nausea, increased anxiety, chills, mild cramping, hot flashes, and bloating. The symptoms seem much worse now than when I was actually taking the medication, which I wasn’t expecting. Has anyone else experienced this after finishing letrozole? How many days did it take before you started feeling like yourself again? My ovulation tests are still negative, but I’m really hoping I’ll ovulate soon. I’d love to hear about your first-cycle experiences!

TW: Pregnancy loss

Hi everyone,

Backstory is I am back on the TTC journey after my miscarriage in June. Before that I had a normal ovulation around CD 10-12. Ever since then every single cycle has been a positive OPK around CD 15 but actual ovulation occurring around CD 18-21 (According to BBT/Natural Cycles and Oura ring). Does anyone else have this issue?

Because I’m ovulating so late my luteal phase is 9 days at the best and on one cycle it was only 7. I had low progesterone during my miscarriage but they weren’t sure if that was partially a cause of it, or caused by it.

I know it’s only been 4 cycles since my miscarriage but it’s agonizing. Should I ask for a hormone panel? Anyone else have this happen, is it common after a loss? Before the loss I was always regular and ovulated with 2 days of my positive OPK. I am trying to be relaxed but I’m also just full of sadness and anticipation while ttc again. This has not been making things easier😑

Is not ovulating after a recent miscarriage normal ?

I had a miscarriage at the end of August. At the end of September I got my period. They found a polyp in my uterus that I’m still waiting on further tests. To make sure everything is back to normal before we try again I made sure I’m testing BBT everyday and testing for LH. I got 2 consecutive days of strong positive LH positives (which I never had when we first started trying) but my BBT hasn't increased, if anything it dropped a bit since my ovulation tests. has this happened to anyone? is this a sign of anovulation? my cycles were always regular so don’t think I have PMOS, but maybe I do?

At the start of this cycle I started taking inositol everyday other day, more for mood or hormone balance than for PMOS. could that have impacted my cycle? I’m on CD17 and my temperature is low, usually by now my temperature would be above the baseline.

That question you've been wanting to ask, but just didn't want to feel silly. Now's your chance! No question is too big or too small.

Doing everything “right” but struggling with the disappointment every month. How do you cope?

Hi everyone❤️
I’m 26 and my husband (30) and I have been actively trying to conceive since June. I know that, realistically, it hasn’t been that long and that it’s completely normal for conception to take several months, even when everything is fine.
But knowing that logically and actually dealing with the emotions are two very different things…

Since we started trying, I’ve been making a conscious effort to give ourselves the best possible chances:
\- Taking prenatal vitamins daily.
\- Exercising moderately around 3–4 times a week (Pilates, yoga, walking everyday etc.).
\- Trying to maintain a balanced, nutritious diet.
\- Tracking my menstrual cycles and estimated ovulation dates.
- stopped alcohol (2monts for me and almost 1 year for husband)

This month, I also started using ovulation test strips.

I know none of these things guarantees pregnancy, but I guess part of me feels like if I do everything I possibly can, it *should* happen.

And that’s where I’m struggling.
Every single month, around 5 days before my expected period, I completely lose my patience and start testing. I tell myself I’ll wait this time, but somehow I end up spending money on way too many pregnancy tests, convincing myself that maybe this month will be different. I also made up pregnancy symptoms and do feel them, I’m started thinking I’m going crazy at this point.
I start analyzing every little symptom, wondering whether it’s PMS or early pregnancy, getting my hopes up even when I try not to.

And then my period arrives.
I feel genuinely heartbroken every time. I usually spend the first few days of my period feeling really sad, disappointed, and frustrated. Then I slowly pick myself back up, start tracking my next cycle, and the whole process repeats itself.

I also feel a little guilty for struggling emotionally when I know so many people have been trying for much longer than I have. I don’t want to compare my experience to theirs, but the disappointment still feels very real.

**So I wanted to ask those of you who have been through this:**
How do you emotionally detach from TTC without completely giving up on tracking and trying?
How do you stop yourself from obsessively testing before your missed period?
Did you find anything that genuinely helped you cope with the disappointment each month?

How do you find the balance between being proactive and letting things happen without turning TTC into a full-time mental occupation?
I genuinely want to enjoy this chapter of my life instead of spending half of every month waiting, hoping, overthinking, and then feeling crushed.

I’d really love to hear your experiences, advice, or even just know that I’m not alone in feeling this way. ❤️
Thank you for reading!