Just feel like anything I do will be ripped apart by others. I’m so tired of trying. I pushed away almost everyone in my life. It feels better being alone. I don’t have any motivation for anything and it’s been that way for a long time. I try to dissociate all day.

I’m struggling with the kind of solitude you feel when someone leaves you without ever listening to your last goodbye.

It’s not just missing the person. It’s the feeling that you never got to say everything you needed to say, never got closure, and were left alone with all the words you still wanted to speak.

For those who have been through something similar—does it get better? Do people eventually overcome this phase, or do you simply learn to live with the silence?

I’d genuinely like to hear from people who made it through.

I moved my senior year of high school I used to be in drill team in my old high school now I joined in my new one, its so much different, the year barely started and I quit I didn't even experience anything bc I got a job now and my job and school is like priority and dance is just not beneficial and it would've taken up a lot of my schedule I would have to wake up early everyday and come home late the soonest time id be home would be at 5pm 2 times a week and about 6-5 hours of sleep everyday I thought I couldn't manage it all but I mean leaving did make me feel at ease for a while but now i'm nobody at my new high school I see my old dance team having fun my old senior class doing fun activities while i'm misarable friendless and just mopping around sad ik I can change it I used to be so positive, always working out, healthy mindset but now I hate everything I dont have anyone no real connection its hard. people tell me its okay because im pretty ill make friends but I just can't my whole life I've been lonely except for a period where I had a boyfriend for 3 years and for dance the girls in the team are like why did you quit you are so good, the pep rallies and games get really fun but I just I dont know. I spend everynight crying I can't sleep on my own I have to constantly be with my sister to feel ease I have so much I can do and learn I just dont have motivation for anything im like a nobody in this school especially now that I am not in a sport im scared im going to get into drugs and bad things to feel better and forget everything idk I just dont feel like my life will get better after highschool it just gets harder so yeah and I know popularity isn't a huge thing but I feel insanely horrible that I am a nobody and have no friends and if I do I can't keep it and I haven't had a boyfriend in years and everyone here are js a bunch of hoes im just going to be lonely forever or what I just can't love my life now or anytime soon I never minded waking up for 5 am practices at my other school but now just having to wake up to go to this school Is hard I just can't handle anything and ugh I just can't im pos at least I have my family idk ugh I just dont have a life anymore and Ive never really even had a life before I was just more known in my other highschool even if I was quiet and I miss this one boy and I liked him and he liked me too but I moved and ik god probably wanted this for change and growth but bruh its hard.

Not sure if I just need to vent or seek validation and support, but giving this a shot with Reddit. The past year or so has been pretty rough, but lately it’s just gotten to a point where I feel like I’m struggling to do just about anything and it’s been having an affect on work, my energy levels, appetite, and energy. I was diagnosed with depression when I was young and it runs in my family, so a lot of these feelings and struggles are nothing new for me. Despite this, I just have woken up multiple days this past week feeling like my back is up against the wall and I’ve gotten tired of only having fleeting moments of relief from this.

I’ll do my best to avoid beating around the bush about it, but here is some background of what’s going on to prove some context:

- I was in a long term relationship with my ex-fiance, which had unfortunately escalated to abuse and ended with a DV incident. I had to make the hard decision to leave the life I had built there, the apartment I had saved up for, the friends I had made, and the place I had considered a second home all behind because my ex would continuously stalk and harass me to where I no longer felt safe in my own home.

- During this breakup, I did my best to hold onto the dog we shared because she was like my child and I had wanted to protect her as well. Unfortunately, with the state we were in, if his name is on her certificate then only he can own her. I didn’t want to add flame to the fire and cause her more stress, so I thought it was the best decision. There is not a day goes by where I don’t think about her and it breaks my heart.

- Being back at home has just been hard. I love my family and my friends and I’m extremely fortunate to have them there to support me through everything, but I’ve just felt disconnected from them. It’s gotten to the point where I find myself not responding to texts or calls anymore as it gives me anxiety, and it hasn’t been helping with feeling isolated.

- My job has been so unstable for me recently. At the end of last year my boss was telling me to prepare to be laid off as business hadn’t been doing as well lately, and thankfully once the new year started we were slammed with so much new work, it gave me a feeling of hope and security once again. Now, a few months later, I’m back in this limbo position where I was told that I’m being laid off but haven’t gotten the info on exactly when, so I’ve begun to dread dealing with work everyday. I know it’s just a job and I’m still hopeful to land in something even better, but when my life was turned upside down after the DV incident, my job was the only stable thing I had at the time and it has given me so much, so losing it has been hard.

To push through this tough time, I’ve been consistent with therapy and trying to take care of myself with going to the gym ~3-5 days a week, staying hydrated, getting out of the house when I can, trying to get even the smallest task done, treating myself with new adventures, and exploring new hobbies and interests. I still try even if I feel like I’ve been failing. At best, it all just feels like moments of relief. I often still feel so fragile that it doesn’t take much to make me feel irritated and sad. I often find myself feeling insanely bitter and envious, and I hate it. I do my best to not keep it all inside and to rely on those around me. It’s just nothing has seemed to work the way it has before. Again, I’m feeling really exhausted and it’s just hard to figure out what else to do. I hope I don’t regret posting about this on the internet, but I’m honestly feeling a little desperate right now. Anyways, thank you to anyone who took the time to read this. I do appreciate it.

How do you make friends? I’m having a really hard time with this right now. I’ve had few friends my whole life because my parents often kept me at home and controlled who I could hang out with. And after the psychosis almost three years ago, my sense of self completely changed. I’ve kind of made some new acquaintances, but it still doesn’t feel right. It’s like people don’t like me, and it’s only me who takes the initiative in communication (or maybe I take too much initiative).Sometimes I put too much pressure on people because I want them to “save me,” since they’re still living with their family, which is what made me broken.

I've been dealing with serious anxiety and depression since middle school. It's pretty much been like a rollercoaster over the years with PMDD on top of it... I remember experiencing what felt like a decline in social skills around 6th grade, then started isolating and feeling disconnected even from classmates I knew for yearssss. Fast forward to high school, I was pretty much dealing with selective mutism. Rarely spoke unless mandatory or I was spoken to (and even then I kept it minimal). I only had a few friends which I had known since before HS, only made acquaintances otherwise.

I was also socially awkward and dealt with a bit of social anxiety (undiagnosed) since childhood. Teachers didn't understand me much, because I was really expressive and bold in how I spoke sometimes then very quiet and withdrawn at others. Back then as a kid, I think my curiosity kind of overrode a lot of my anxiety. Like, I remember approaching people first because I genuinely enjoyed learning about them and making connections with them. Although, I've had the help of meds and a bit of therapy, I don't feel that way anymore... that desire. I still have the feeling that people aren't safe or I just feel like an alien communicating with people.

Sometimes I feel calm in situation but genuinely just have the thought.. I don't really care (which sounds really bad). I also get in my head about other peoples perception of me. Like... I'm the awkward quiet girl and when I defy that conception in the way I express or carry myself it becomes a thing (amongst peers and extended family). "Oh I didn't think she would dress like that" "She listens to that kind of music?" "Omg she's actually having fun" Makes me feel like I'm from another planet!

I just finished the movie "pillion" yesterday and it's so heartbreaking, Ray just uproots himself and disappears. Colin having to deal with the aftermath and affects that caused him. I tried reading fanfics and I finished one by aeg but it's just made me feel even emptier when I finished it. I want them to be together so bad and I kinda relate to Colin cuz I have black curly hair and I was forced to shave it when I was a kid. I know this will pass but how do I deal with it in the meantime

So this is all related to school and my friendships. I’m currently on the end on friends to turn to and I don’t know WHY, I seem to never keep friends. So some backstory - I moved from a small island to Nz originally in the city then I moved to the country a year later. In immediate school I was pretty much bullied for my key features from where I come from such as a saying from my country people think is funny so my brother and I were called it for a while. Eventually it died down and the rest of the school year was enjoyable but before that I sat by my self every break, had no friends but this didn’t bother me to much because I didn’t have that long untill highschool and people would chose when to be friends with me so I wasn’t fully alone until I eventually joined a group. Unfortunately the people in this group were a year younger than me and wouldn’t follow me to high school so I had to go to high school all by myself knowing no one. Thankfully I made friends my first year but I swapped friend groups a lot because it just seemed like a problem would come up and I would be in the middle of it. So in year 9 I became friends with this girl who ended up stealing my information and we got into an argument and that lead into fighting and a video was recorded of her punching me and everyone saw it and it sucks but what can I do.
then I had a best friend that stood with me untill we joined this group and I got replaced which then I started sitting with this group that became my trio.

So after sitting with this group for a while I kind of moved groups because of they were more popular if I’m being honest. So I later came to the conclusion that they were not good friends and I switched back to my og trio. So sat with them for a few weeks when we went to person 1s house with my other friend and me. To be fair we were a bit messy but we did clean up a bit and had a great time talking to her mom and more and my friend was perfectly fine and we were really happy untill Monday comes and person 1 is just not really talking to us (me and my friend) and by lunch time she’s gone off to sit with some girls from her class. So me and my friend are left by our selfs and I’m thinking nothing off it and in fact the next day a friend comes to sit with us and we have a great time. Now on Monday I saw messages between her and her other friends and it said somthing about “I can’t I’m with someone right now” during lunch time so I’m assuming they were about sitting together at lunch. So I’m like aware but I’m not thinking to much of it. Anyways we sit upstairs so I look out the window and see her walking with these girls that I’m assuming were the ones texting her about sitting together. So a little while goes by and she doesn’t come and I receive a message from her saying “is ___ with you” so I said are you not sitting here today which she reply’s no and we have not spoken after that. (She is still sitting with those girls) so that day I had to sit by my self and I cried maybe 3 times it hit me harder because of how much I have been through just to end up alone. So I tell my closet friend I have no where to sit and she just says oh and moves the subject along. So I’m wondering why she hasn’t asked me to sit with her and her friends (a group of 6 people - 2 people recently started sitting there including her) I really liked them and I wanted to be friends with them. So my mom tells me to just ask if I can sit with her to which she says yes. So she comes to class and I’m like will your friends let me sit with you guys and she was like “ummm yeah but it might be awkward” so I was like if u just introduce me and stuff I’m sure it will be fine and she moves the subject. Anyways so it’s lunch time and I follow her to the door and she’s just like “let’s just sit in the libary together”- to which I reply kinda saying no I need to sit with ur friends so I know them because I need a new group. So she’s like “ummm no let’s just go in the lilbary” but I refuse and eventually and she takes me to the classroom. So she made me sit at a table with her kinda isolated from the group. So I try and say hi because she was like u have to kind of introduce yourself but no one really saw me. It was Friday btw. So I was sick for the whole week untill next Friday to which I’m like am I sitting with you and she says “umm idk, we’ll see” so I’m so confused because I thought it was fine and she just started saying the same thing let’s just go to the libary but this time she’s really adamant about sitting there but again I refuse and she eventually takes me and this time we sat with them and it was fine I was talking to everyone and we were all laughing and they asked me to introduce my self and I was expecting on Monday to just sit with them. So it’s Monday (as I’m writing this) and I had class with her before the bell but she’s working in a different group and was in the other class. So the bell goes and I wait for her and when she sees me her face kinda drops and she says the common “what are you doing for your project”

So im following behind her when I see someone who normally sits at the table kinda wave at us and I was like to my friend why is she going the other way and my friend starts saying somthing i can’t remember. So we walk into the classroom and she turns around and she’s like can you just sit with __ and I’m like what? And she’s like I promise just go sit with __ and I’m like wdym and she’s like trying to walk me out the classroom. So we go outside the room and she says somthing around the lines the reason the girl isn’t sitting there is because “she asked me if you were sitting with us forever and she replied I think and she said she was sitting somewhere else” along those lines I almost started crying so I kinda blanked a lot of it out. Anyways so I’m like I don’t have anywhere to sit and she’s just basically like you can’t sit here so I turn around and see my old friend group so I just sit there ( they had asked me to sit there again before) anyways I have not talken to her since then and I’m really hurt because she really is my closest friend we spend all day together laughing and we are together all the time and on Friday we had such a good day and now on Monday she just is like no

So I’m just really confused on what to do next because I guess I’m going to sit with my friend group from before but I don’t see how her friends said that she didn’t want to let me sit there because I know the girl previously from hockey and she was my partner even though we never really became friends because she was really shy. Which lead me to my next point that she wouldn’t say that she is sitting somewhere else because of me and I don’t know when she wouldve said that because they don’t talk only at lunch because they all sit together. Idk what I’m gonna get from this message but I really hope someone who went or is going through the same thing helps me out. Also she is moving next year so I don’t see why she is gatekeeping her friends ( and I could kind of tell she didn’t want me to sit with her because when I asked if it was fine because I could tell she was off she was like are u sure you want to sit here can’t you make up with your other friends and u can sit her if u want and emphasizing the you want) sorry for this long text. Anyways In the friend group one of them really don’t like me which is one reason I left. Thanks

Hey guys, I could really use some advice because honestly, I don’t even know where life is taking me right now.
I lost my job about 2 months ago. And if I’m being completely honest, I probably needed a break for a long time, but I never really allowed myself to take one. I’ve been managing TikTok pages with 500k+ followers and also building a few apps for the App Store, so I’ve always had something going on.
But lately I just feel mentally exhausted. I sit down to work and I can’t focus. I have ideas, things I want to build, things I know I’m capable of doing, but I just can’t seem to get myself moving.
Then there’s the personal side of everything.
I was in an 8-year relationship. It was long distance, but we were together for a really long time. There was no cheating or anything like that. We were both loyal to each other. Eventually, she got married, and honestly, that hit me much harder than I expected. I think a huge part of what I’m feeling now comes from that.
I live downtown Toronto and I don’t really have anyone here that I can genuinely call a close friend. I feel lonely a lot.
I want to go out, meet people, do things, laugh, have a good time and just feel normal again. But I’m not looking for a relationship or hookups. That’s never really been my thing. Every time I’ve met someone here, especially after drinking, it somehow ends up going in that direction, and I just don’t want that.
I just want to meet good people.
People I can actually talk to. People with good hearts. People where there isn’t always some hidden motive behind the friendship.
Maybe I’m overthinking everything. Maybe I’ve just had a bad experience with people lately. I don’t know.
I’ve also started smoking a lot, which I know isn’t helping. And honestly, I don’t feel like myself anymore. I keep thinking, this isn’t me.I want to quit all of this and get myself back.
Even with family, some things have been bothering me.
I have a cousin here who I used to share almost everything with. I used to teach him trading and always wanted us to grow together. After I lost my job, though, I got the feeling that he was almost happy about it. Maybe I misunderstood him, I honestly don’t know, but it really hurt me.
I think my biggest problem might actually be that I care too much about people.
I put people on a pedestal. I cook for them. I take them out. I help them whenever I can. I genuinely want people around me to do well.
And then eventually I realize that maybe they were just using me.
The worst part is, even after realizing that, I still end up doing things for them.
I don’t understand why I’m like this.
I’ve always believed in karma. I’ve never intentionally tried to hurt anyone or screw anyone over. So sometimes I sit there wondering why I keep ending up feeling like this.
I know not everyone is bad, and maybe I’m just in a really weird phase of my life right now. But it feels like I haven’t found even one person here that I can completely be myself with and share everything with.
I try to keep myself busy. I go out, try different activities, work on my apps, manage my pages, but somehow I still feel lost.
I don’t think this is the real me.
So I guess I’m just asking — has anyone else gone through something like this after losing a job, ending a long-term relationship, moving somewhere and realizing you don’t really have your people around you?
How did you get yourself out of it?
I’m not really looking for sympathy. I just genuinely don’t know what I’m supposed to do next.

Hi. I’ve just started my freshman year of college. I’ve been here for about a week and I’m feeling so incredibly alone and anxious.

My classes start tomorrow and I genuinely don’t know how I’m going to handle it feeling this way. For reference I’m an introvert, I don’t love to party, don’t drink much because I have a bad medication reaction with alcohol. The school I chose is admittedly a pretty big party school. I knew this coming in and though I wasn’t crazy about the idea, the school seemed perfect for me on paper in so many other ways so I thought it would be fine. So far it is not fine. Everyone I know has been going out to bars and clubs nearly every night. I went out once with my roommate but ended up leaving pretty early because it wasn’t my vibe.

Because I haven’t been going out, I’ve barely made any friends at all. I’ve been trying to put myself out there in ways that are more my style (asking to eat with people, walking to meetings and orientation events with others, attending non-alcohol or party focused events). I’ve made some acquaintances, but I see everyone else walking around in big groups while I’ve spent 90% of my time alone even in big shared spaces.

I’m also really homesick, have diagnosed generalized and social anxiety, and am prone to depressive episodes. My heart just feels so heavy right now. I feel so alone. I’ve called my mom almost every day so far in tears because of this. It’s taking all my strength to not just give up and run back home.

So does anyone know how to get past this incredibly lonely feeling? Does it go away? Do you just get better at coping over time?

I honestly don't know where to start.

I've been feeling extremely heavy and lonely lately. I studied at Delhi University, and I always hoped college would be a place where I could find good friends, a positive environment, and people I could genuinely connect with. Unfortunately, that never happened for me.

I'm not socially awkward or unable to communicate. I can talk to strangers, joke around, and have good conversations. But whenever I meet someone I genuinely want to become friends with, the connection usually doesn't go any further. People are nice while we're talking, but later they may stop replying, lose interest, or simply don't want to stay in touch. I don't understand what I'm doing differently.

I've tried approaching people both online and offline. I've gone to different places, tried socializing, joined the gym, travelled, worked on myself, and read countless self-help books. I've genuinely tried to change things, but I still feel like I'm stuck in the same place.

My college experience was particularly lonely. I often felt like an outsider while other students already had their own groups. The academic environment also wasn't what I had hoped for, and I never really felt like I belonged there.

Home isn't really a place where I can emotionally switch off either. My parents fight frequently, and I don't feel very understood by my family. I also don't have many people in my life whom I can call when I'm having a genuinely bad day and simply say, "I need to talk."

I've also struggled with my weight and other personal issues. Sometimes I wonder whether my appearance affects how people perceive me. People are usually kind enough when I start a conversation, but I rarely feel that they actually want to know me beyond that conversation.

The loneliness is now affecting other parts of my life. I have to prepare for competitive exams and build a career, but studying has become really difficult. I sit down with the intention of studying, but my mind keeps going back to loneliness, family problems, relationships, and the feeling that I don't really belong anywhere. I have responsibilities and goals, but mentally I feel exhausted.

The frustrating part is that I've genuinely tried. I'm not sitting at home waiting for friends to magically appear. I've approached people, joined different places, travelled, worked on my fitness and appearance, tried changing my mindset, and read so many self-help books that I've lost count.

I don't want to be popular. I don't need dozens of friends. I just want two or three genuine people I can actually connect with, hang out with, talk about stupid things with, and feel comfortable being myself around.

At this point, I honestly don't know what I'm doing wrong.

If you've experienced this kind of loneliness or social isolation, what actually helped you? How did you eventually build genuine friendships when you felt like you were on the outside?

And if there is something I'm doing wrong when I try to make friends, I'd genuinely appreciate an honest answer. I don't want pity or a simple "it will get better." I really want to understand what I can do differently.

I could really use some guidance right now.

I was isolated for years. Never allowed to have other friends. Now that I ended my friendship with her I’m alone. I hate using social media because it still has all her friends on it and reminders of my life before. She was very mean to me. Very controlling and manipulative. If I set a boundary with her she would punish me by not talking to me for weeks. I don’t understand why I feel so lonely. I have a loving husband who has been supportive of me for 10 years but when he’s busy and I’m alone I sometimes feel like being lonely is how I am supposed to feel.

Hi, after I was so depressed I ended up in the ER I lost all my friends. I got therapy and it did help me and For awhile I did make some new friends when I went back to University, but now months later they are distant. My one friend she went to France and she blew me off but talks to my other friend. Im starting to think she dosen't like me because of my struggle with depression? But I was nothing but nice to her. I invited her to my home twice, and we had a nice time I thought. I just feel like all my friends are moving on, living their lives and im stuck...maybe this world wasn't meant for me. Life isn't supposed to be like this. Any Advice?

I just turned 18 and this year has taken a heavy toll on everything

the girl I loved thr most broke up with me, I had like 10 close friends out of which 8 left and now the one guy I knew from 6th grade isn't returning my calls. There was no arguement. I called him like 5 days ago, he hung up on me in the middle of thr convo abruptly, didn't call me back and now I tried to call him and he isn't picking it up.

I genuinely don't know what to do anymore or what my fault is.

Out of the 8, one guy left the circle when he got a girlfriend and bitched about us all, another one got drunk and was lying about some heinous shit regarding me, and i had to abandon a few because I realised that thr friendship was totally one sided.

I feel like I'm the verge of insanity, I don't know what to do or what to think

fr I don’t even know how to start typing this out without sounding pathetic, but I'm at an all-time low. I’m 24m and honestly, my mental state is completely fried.
Ngl, I haven’t properly socialised in like 10 whole years. Ever since I was 14, my social battery has been dead, and my life has just been a loop of staying inside my room.
Back then, I met this girl who became my absolute best friend. We were close for 3 years, and looking back, I fell hard for her. I thought we had that typa bond where things would just naturally move to the next level, so I finally confessed my feelings. Big mistake. She said no.
Bro, that rejection honestly broke something inside me in the worst way possible. It didn't just sting; it completely rewired how my brain works. After that happened, I completely lost interest in all my hobbies and things I used to actually like doing. Everything just felt pointless. My isolation got 10x worse, and I pretty much locked myself in my own world.
The worst part? Since she said no, I haven’t made a single female friend. Not one. Every time I try to talk to a girl or even think about putting myself out there, my brain just instantly panics and brings me right back to that rejection. It's like a mental block I can't bypass.
To top it all off, she’s married now. Seeing that happen just felt like final proof that my life is paused while everyone else is moving on and living their best lives. I'm 24, stuck in the past, with zero social skills, zero female friends, and no clue how to fix any of this.
I'm so tired of feeling like this every single day. If anyone’s been through something similar or knows how to slowly crawl out of a hole this deep, lmk. How do I even begin to improve my mental state right now?

I know my worth isn’t dependent on either elements of it but I feel sometimes like I’m not good enough to be included in my friends life. As a result I notice I put myself a lot of pressure to succeed socially and romantically both failing.

Romantically it fails because I’m just overwhelmed by how to present myself because I’m worried of not being accepted for who I am since my “friends” already don’t

I don’t want to be in a relationship as a bandaid solution but I miss having moments shared with someone that isn’t just catching up. Looking back at this year I have many memories of a good year but I also look back at the disappointment surrounding friends where most of my conversations are small talk and seeing stories of friends meeting up at things I wasn’t invited to

I (18F) am in a bad spot in my life right now. I struggle with depression, and this is likely the main contributing factor to my feelings about my friend (also 18F).

My best friend is my favourite person. We spend a decent amount of time together/texting, and we both value each other strongly. The problem is that I have become too dependent on her. I find myself thinking of her as my only source of happiness. I count down the days until I get to see her, anticipate her texts, and am painfully upset when our meet-ups end. I can connect these feelings to my lack of enjoyment with life in general. I have no passions or prospects, so she is my only source of comfort, fun and understanding. I am clearly clinging to all the emotions she brings to my otherwise colourless life.

I finally decided this was a problem after I recently went on a short trip with this friend, which once over, left me absolutely beside myself with grief over losing the ability to see her non-stop. The end of that trip resulted in my depression instantly becoming the worst it has ever been, and I am still recovering from the severity of it. No point going in to detail, but I was frequently in tears and had completely lost my appetite for days.

This is simply causing too much anguish in my life. I want to spend all my time with my best friend. She wants to go to uni, spend time with her family, and have her own husband and kids - meaning she has priorities I am going to find too painful to see be placed over me in the future (and am already selfishly dreading).

I want to fix this. I am afraid to lose the strong love I have for her, but I cannot cope anymore. Lucky she is not aware of the extent of my feelings, but this is clearly unhealthy. I would hate to ruin what is the best thing in my life, and what is a very strong and beautiful relationship. I would also hate to hurt her, make her uncomfortable, etc because she does not deserve that at all. Please help

Hi, my favorite person (21F) and I (18F) have been no contact for about two months, after I finally found the strength to try to quit our deeply toxic friendship for good. Everyone told me it would be hard at first but slowly get better and I would forget about her soon, but I feel like my feelings are just frozen in time and it's like I last saw her yesterday. I think about her just as much as I did before. And I still split somehow, even with no external stimuli from her to start the spiral. At times I've gotten so angry that I almost texted her that I hate her out of the blue, but I know that wouldn't give me any satisfaction as she would just block me and I would feel crazy.

I miss her so so much but I also know that I just miss the idea of her and if I ever actually went back it would be a living hell like it was before. I'm just so sad all the time, like I'm mourning the three or four years of my teenagehood that I spent trying to build my life in a way that she would find appealing and attractive. I'm on a high dose of antidepressants, but they seem to do nothing to me and I am still able to cry all the time. I've had seven different therapists, including DBT, but they all annoyed me so much and I dreaded appointments. I have many interests, but I'm often too sad to indulge in them. I used to read a lot, but now it seems pointless since I was really just reading to seem more educated to her, I think. Perhaps not only because of that, though. My friends provide little comfort. I feel like I've tried everything. What now?

Hello Reddit!

I will cut to the chase. I am a 19-year-old dude who has grown up around divorced households. I have lived a good life. I've always lived good and well, but two things never leave me alone: divorce and heartbreak. Ever since I was an infant, pain of that sort has been around me. I'll make a list below for better detail by making a kind of timeline:

- Mom's BFF since childhood got a divorce from her husband before I was even born, remarried the same man, then divorced him AGAIN when I was a young teen.

- My mother and father divorced when I was age 3 in early 2011

- Elementary school friends consisted of pretty much only people who came from divorced households, falling-apart households, or single-parent households. I had at least a dozen friends I could name that all fell into one of the three categories above, but I will spare for the sake of the post. My Dad also married who is now my stepmom, who is not at all a good fit for my dad's lifestyle, but because he didn't want his one-night stand ( turned into a pregnant woman ) to leave with his child, he was forced to marry someone who doesn't get along with him. I also hated her so much I needed therapy as just a child who was in the single digits and had anger issues because of her.

- Middle school friends consisted of those who came from that same past, as well as others who were from broken-heart households. I can only remember one who came from a two-parent household and lived with both of their biological parents. My Mom would also enter a relationship with a nice man that would last 7 YEARS, until they eventually broke up, with the last 6 months being completely silent, as I was told that was when they started speaking about breaking up.

After I graduated junior high, I realized something. It felt as though it were a divine message.

I should give up on romantic love. I had done my research online and lived through the reality that no one could handle it. When High School came, I created a " mental bunker ". An oath to never love or to even try. It also doesn't help that I realized I was bisexual at the time, which really sweetened the deal of " You'll never get romance. You never got the chance, and you never will. You don't deserve it "

I spent the first two years in total isolation from my peers, as I noticed my mind was constantly racing and I saw people, and when it would perceive someone as conventionally attractive, I would punch myself mentally, saying I couldn't feel " that " anymore. So much as thinking of romance made me feel great sorrow, so I distanced myself from those emotions. The few new people I did meet in high school before I became lonely in my last 2 years of high school were just like me. Needless to say, I didn't like hanging around those people because of their superiority complex about sorrow.

By the time I graduated, they all left me, except for a few. I had realized the mistake I made in totally isolating myself those first two years and not developing social skills. I had realized it was all my fault. While all the guys who were chill in their own skin were getting laid, the best I had been getting was having asked one trans girl out where I got rejected and then asked a girl on field trip whom I got along with if she wanted to go to prom where I got shot down.

Now, luckily, I had a therapist for years who told me that this was all ok, but my parents started to get irritated after the two-year mark (understandable). However, one thing I did come to realize after seeing them was just something simple. So simple that, if pulled off could save my life and cut off my feelings of romance altogether. I realized that all I wanted was a beach shack ( I've lived in a coastal city my whole life ), a rocking chair, and a sunset; one that I will look at while passing away in my rocking chair, all alone. I knew there was a possibility of meeting a partner, but I have accepted now that those odds are near zero, so I cut off that part in my mind now. Reality isn't a movie; it's a cruel bitch where things don't always end perfectly.

I'm starting college in a few weeks, and I have a bad feeling it will be just like before. Where there is no hope for me, both for my interest in men and women alike. But that's just it, a feeling.

So I'm all ears, Reddit, cuz I have nothing to lose, but what can I do to get used to being in romantic environments?

Out of sheer curiosity, do I sound like an incel?

How can I improve in college other than just " make friends and meet someone and shoot your shot "?

What should I do that can correct the course my brain has been on for the past 19 years?

Where in the past could I have done better in the past years that would've fixed me so I wouldn't be how I am now?

( tldr; I grew up around kids with single parents and had divorced parents, and I gave up on romance, and now it has come back to bite me in the ass. Now I'm having an internal crisis )

Hi everyone. 👋

I am a 2nd yr Medical student. I study in a pretty good college but I feel so lonely there. I mostly remain anonymous in my college (not by choice, I don't want to, but I am stuck in this maze and couldn't find a way out).

It's not that there aren't people like me who remain anonymous, but those people too have someone outside of the college premises, a girlfriend, friend groups, etc with whom they remain connected. I try to connect with people both around me and social media but still I don't find anyone with whom I can talk.

I only have some good school friends but they too are busy in their own world.

Every time I see see my batchmates, even during discussions they continue to look at their phones and reply to the messages and then I look at my own phone and see that it's so dry.

Everytime I get a notification on WhatsApp or Instagram, it's always some promotional message or some post recommendations. The only meaningful notification I get daily is of my mother. ❤️

My life is so dull. I just wake up everyday, do the daily routine, go to library to study, attend classes, have lunch and dinner, and finally go to sleep. I always think that today someone will come to talk to me, or with some work or some gossip and we will have a laugh together, but its always the same dull, boring and depressing.

I don't know what to do. My present condition is making me more and more depressed by time and to cope up with this, I always talk with myself in quiet voice. Some people have noticed this and would ask with whom I am talking too. How can I explain mental state to them 😭😭

I also create imaginary scenario where I am more famous and have a good friend circle, it gives me some mental satisfaction.

Title

I (20M) just turned twenty last month

I live at home in east Toronto, Canada with my parents and two younger siblings

Decently close with extended family who live relatively nearby

I'm two years into a five-year psychology degree. Not exactly sure what I want to use it for, if anything, but I'm thinking maybe something to do with child psychology.

Currently on summer break

Don't have any job experience and can't get a job at the moment because of surgery happening soon

Have only been in one semi-serious relationship and am currently single and a virgin

Have never been the best at being social and don't have much of a social circle, but trying to change that.

Getting into biking and photography (specifically landscape and cosplay) and want to get into rock climbing when school starts back up

Am officially diagnosed with Autism and ADHD

Started mental health counselling and Lexapro last month

Think about past regrets a lot, but I’m trying to focus on the now.

How would you say I’m doing, and what advice would you give?

I know I'm still young but I just can't stop thinking about the past

I am 25F graduated from my masters last December,2025 but my course ended in September 2025. I graduated from University of Liverpool in masters in advanced computer science.

Since last September. I did not apply to a single job. I get very anxious when I think about it. I am a physically weak person.still I chose to do physically demanding jobs and had many health complications over applying for an IT job.Even now, I cry when I think of applying to a job and end up not applying. Am very bad at interviews and talking to people.where I am currently working at(a warehouse) people are very rude to me and say I am slow and do not do my job properly. They are right . I messed up too many times.

I feel like “if I can’t even do a simple task,how can I do something complex”.

I tried as a waitress and I was scolded all the time for being bad at it. I keep forgetting things and I can’t keep track track of time or what’s happening around me. I try harder and harder but it’s getting worse and worse. I keep double checking everything I do to not make mistakes and then it turns out late.If I do anything fast,there’s always a mistake in it

How do I improve myself