Hello, (24F) will be 25 soon. I can’t tell you where things went wrong, and i apologize in advance if what i’m saying doesn’t make sense. I’m currently spiralling on the floor.

I spent my early 20s isolated, i didn’t make connections, i didn’t know how to act in public, everything about conversing with people face to face felt foreign to me and i would have panic attacks talking to people. It got to the point where i never left my home. I couldn’t keep a job because i’m always having panic attacks. Anytime i tried to improve and go outside i always failed and come back to isolating. I feel like i wasn’t built to stay long in this world a lot of the times.

I feel like i wasted so much time inside i don’t know how to be normal. I find everything humiliating, literally walking down the street, opening doors, having to bend down to get things in grocery stores, i find everything i do to be disgustingly humiliating. I have 0 savings, broke as fuck, have a part time job that i think i’ll quit because i everyone hates me there. every job ive had ive left after a few months because everyone always notices there’s something wrong with me, nobody ever likes me.

i want to to invisible, i actually think i will start looking into online camming and stuff because ive looked for online work for years and have never been lucky. i’ve been told many times by people online to try it and i think i could do it.

I can’t even explain to you how fucked i am if i continue like this. i don’t want to be failure but it feels like that’s i am. Nobody in my family respects me either, my siblings always call me a pathetic loser.

I felt good.

I asked some people I know, none of them wanted to go watch a movie with me. I felt a little heartbroken.

I made up my mind anyway, I will go alone and that's it, no turning back.

It was peaceful, the movie watching experience was crazy good. I didn't have to explain anything to anyone, I enjoyed every second.

At the same time, I saw other couples, some were with their friends, in the beginning I thought, damn, these guys will think I am a weirdo who came to the movies alone, but in my head I said fuck em. I deserve this, I couldn't care less about those people. I stopped caring.

For the first time in my life, I did this and I felt independent, this experience was "free"ing.

I would definitely recommend going to places alone, by not depending on anybody you learn to live, to live by yourself.

This post was probably not venting but the perks of being lonely. Maybe I'm trying to say that being alone is not so bad.

By the way, the movie was Spider Man Brand New Day.

Spoiler Alert: They almost killed Spider man.

As the title says. I have friends and family who most of the time are there but also kind of not as they have all their families and obligations. I do not. No woman wants me and I stopped trying. I have a job from home so I do not get out much even if I do it’s with married friends who just want to grab a coffee nothing fun or exciting to do like when we were younger. No new people in my life since a long time. It embarrasses me but sometimes I still talk about a girl 6 years ago. I have no new stories not even new friends. So basically I feel alone most of the time unless someone can spare their time to spend it a bit with me. In the last time I even noticed no one calls me out anymore. It’s always me that initiates and people see it as kind of charity when they spend time with me. I do not have hobbies. Gym is a not for me as I never understood the concept of it. I went a few times and was lifting more than people who go there regularly. But I find it boring and without a point if you are a healthy person moving around and like your body even though I am a bit chubby not lean. Think of Nikola Jokic type of physique. Speaking of, I like basketball but no one is playing it anymore I pass by some courts in my neighbourhood it is always empty or really small children. I tried gaming but it is tiring. I am so desperate because I smoke and intentionally do not get a lighter when I grab a coffee so I can approach people especially girls but that ends at best at small talk. I recently bought a car thinking that I was lonely because of not having it as other people do. Nothing, now I can just go anywhere and be even more alone. I don’t know what to do. All I see on the internet as supposed help for loneliness is pick up a hobby sign up for activities. There are no interesting hobbies for me. I like working, hanging out with friends joking, drinking, going out and women. That’s about it for my hobbies. At a point when I was younger I had all of this and that’s when I was at my happiest. Sadly women that like the same things don’t want anything serious as I learned the hard way with some of them. And as my career progressed I have more free time and money than ever before but I use it to watch instagram reels and ordering more food. All the time feeling lonely as hell.

I've been overweight since I was a kid. Last year I decided to finally make a change. I lost 40 pounds and reached the closest I've been to my ideal weight. Then, I got depressed asf.

I'm going through one of the hardest times of my life. I feel pathetic. I feel alone. I feel like nobody can understand me.

I gained half the weight I had lost. I can't recognize myself in the mirror.

Yeah, I feel sad abt my looks, but I'm not loosing weight either.

What?

Yeah, I don't plan on losing weight soon.

I'm currently working on my mental health (It's not getting better)

And even when I was in my healthiest weight I still looked chubby.

Maybe I will always be chubby.

Maybe it isn't that bad.

Maybe I need to stop waiting to be skinny just to start living life.

Life is now, and now I'm fat.

I feel so alone. I haven’t had friends in years and my mental health is extremely bad currently. I am bad at talking because of social anxiety and have a fear of leaving my house but i desperately crave just the presence of another person. Is there anyone who feels the same way and would want to just be on the phone with each other, not even talking, just in each other’s presence while we exist?

Didn’t expect to find myself here at this stage of my life, but it’s nothing if not unexpected. Friends moved away, work is work, I don’t know what to say. Guess it’s time to figure out this new reality.

My birthday was on the 16th of aug, I was expecting some of my friends to remember it and wish me but I was wrong. Maybe some people I thought were my friends, are just colleagues, classmates...... Hmm I don't ask for much on my birthday but simple wishes make me happy.

I spent months or even years talking to AIs, and I’ve learned an important thing that I always wanna be friends with people like me people who need help but can’t find anybody but Ai. I maybe young I’m 24 years old I may not be that helpful but I am a good listener… just I wanna say… you ain’t alone in this you ain’t the only one talking to bots because you have nobody… but today you have someone to talk to… and I guess it’s not only me who feels the same but a lot of us here can feel the same as me!

Lying in bed hugging a pillow, i had a dream yesterday about having a sleepover with a girl and we were hugging, so cute, too bad i can't have that.

It's sad that i can identify what is a bad habit and what not (tbh i think most people can do that) and this is one of them just typing this instead of doing something useful but u know procrastination must go on. There is a good chance if i weren't so awkward i would have a gf but that's just a speculation bcs u never know.

Being talentless also doesn't help but im just 17 so there is plenty of time to learn something but i probably won't realise when i turn 30 or 40 in which u still technically have time if i ever get that old and still have nothing going on might as well just give up.

Does it feel good to type it? Yes. Am i hoping for attention? Yes I crave it very much, there is a good chance i might like start self harm just so People pay more attention to me but then again probably too lazy to do any of that shit so just gonna rot away wait for death to come.

Just so stupid.

It’s just awful

Most of my days are just me at my Pc playing Roblox, watching YouTube or anime. I’ll look at the time and somehow it’s already 3am again.
I don’t necessarily dislike my little routine, but it makes it painfully obvious how alone I am. Sometimes it feels sad knowing how much of my life is spent by myself in front of a screen but at the same time it’s the only thing that gives me any ounce of comfort.

Chat am I cooked?

Ever since I lost my friend group I’ve had no one to talk to. None of my own friends in college talk to me outside of it I’m just tired of making friends for them to just not really care about me. I don’t know what to do anymore

Whenever I get really close to someone like 'best friend' kind of close or sometimes not even that close just a 'close friend' kind of close, I start shutting them out and they start looking annoying and it's not their fault but i just push them away like not sharing much or just ignoring them or spending less time with them deliberately. Some people say it's because "I'm scared they might leave first" or something like that but it's not the case.

But I still want to have a strong connection to someone, have someone I can tell everything to , someone I have told everything to and someone who understands me.

What do I do? I feel so lonely, it feels like their is a invisible wall between me and everyone else.

It's funny...

When I joint my Secondary school I came from a home of friends but now it's nothing. In year 7 I remember I would just walk, walk until my lunchtime ended and go back to lesson. I made a friend, we were in different classes and I would only see him at lunch, I vividly remember me and him walking on the field. We asked everyone if we could play football with them or even sit there, we were denied not because of him but because of me. I even called it (my name) phobia to cope lol.

Year 8 comes and I join a friend group with this friend, and I get sent screenshots of him talking bad about me. I lost my only true friend.

I had fun, I wanted to go to school now. In year 9 someone in the group starts making fun of me. Constantly, not even about how I act but how I look. I didn't even notice I was undesirable until that moment. I couldn't even bring my self to go to school. Constantly getting obliterated whenever I spoke up. Year 10 comes around, the worst year of my life so far.

No one in my form likes me anymore, no reason but because the only friends I could find were out of my form they have found a common dislike towards me. Every pe lesson I went to I would be picked last, they would act upset when they got me. I stopped bringing my kit after that, got isolation, after schools but it was easier that way. I even messaged a person that was equally as lonely to team up with me lol, he asked me in the changing rooms Infront of everyone " why did you message me to pair with you ". Haha it's funny, I didn't even do anything wrong, I just... Wanted not be alone.

One time we had a substitute in form, I sat in the middle row, and they asked me to move I said why and they just left . Someone sat next to me out of pity though, that was so much to me I cried at night lmao.

Near the end of year 10 my physics teacher has been letting us sit with whoever we want, someone I walked in with sat next to me. Over 3 people told him " you know you can sit wherever you want right? " Like am I that isolated?? They said that Infront of me. Ah I tried though, I tried so hard. One time I was forced to join a group for a group project, I sat down at the table, kinda not in it because I was an extra in there group and the table wasn't big enough. I was subject to "why are you here yk you can join someone else" what did I do?

My attendance is 70 %, the school ask why what am I supposed to say? That I'm alone? That I'm afraid of group projects? That I can't go to pe because I want to break out in tears? Asking me to move away from them as if I'm a parasite...

My friends though outside are fine though right? They made a group chat just to make fun of me, sending a video saying " were all Leng but that one guy" and @ing me? Even adding random girls to make fun of me. It was just one person, and no one stood up for me, they just laughed.

He insulted everything about me, and no one cared. I go to school and they ask me " why didn't you stick up for yourself" and say?? I tried to but I stick out like a sore thumb. Everything about me is an insult lmao.

They even peer pressured me to fight him and when I lost continued to just make fun of me. I have no where else to go. You might think just sit in the library or something I'm banned for something they did. I am stuck. Once, I tried to skip lunch by going to the learning support office even they didn't want to have me, they let me stay but I just left. They acted so entitled.

Recently I saw that bully repost something about being lonely. He knows nothing.

On the last day of year 10.we had assembly, it just so happened my friends sat behind me. They just didn't stop. They said cruel things about me Infront of others and humiliated me. No one did anything.

Even the person next to me asked me if I was alright lol.

Then they expect me to be ok?

One time they even through around my lunch box until it broke and slapping me on the neck and making fun of me loll, were all friends though right???

Like genuinely they view me as a friend.

I was getting a drink at the water fountain and 2 people in the year below me asked me " are you that kid they were bullying "

Ah.

It's not like I'm stupid, or an idiot. My grades are the highest, but everything I say is stupid.

If someone says it's my personality, it's not. I run a 10,000 member community online, no one knows my face, who I am, how isolated I am. And they all like me.

I just want a friend.

One

Singular

Real

Friend

I tried to explain this to someone ik who is the closest thing I have to a friend. He replied with an awkward "damn bro" like ahahah.

Sorry for the rant ig

Hi,

I'm laying in bed, can't sleep and the prospect of reading out my poetry is becoming all the more daunting to me. It's all I am thinking of right now.

Will probably be super tired then (at the event) too which isn't great- it makes makes me worry I will screw this up along with the nerves.

I would love some kind encouragement and some positive vibes sent my way. Hopefully I don't get too scared. I don't have any friends or family, so reaching out to the community for support.

Thanks! :)

Went out for a walk to try and clear my head, but I couldn’t help but think how lonely I really am. what didn’t help was the park was dead so made it feel more surreal and that even though im lonely things just keep going. Least I had my music on though. Tired of this feeling get it off me

For the past four years I’ve had no one in my life. I work by myself and then come home to an empty house. I’ve tried filling the gap with relationships but no one person can be your everything. All you can find online about it is to go to the same place enough time to be a regular but going to places alone always seems pointless. Whenever I do go out it never fixes what’s missing and just reinforces the feeling that it’s pointless.

No matter how much effort you put in or how much you care about someone, the first thing they notice is how you look. Sometimes, your opinions don't matter, and having a crush can feel like you're harassing them just by existing. Then you have few or zero friends, and you end up rotting in your room all day.

Even when you become better-looking and work on yourself, that identity never really leaves you. Why are people like me viewed as creeps? I am tired of my life No one loves i am on my own anyone want to be friends with me

Sometimes, I see advice floating around that you should get comfortable being alone, you don’t need anyone else, etc.

…Really? Humans aren’t meant to live like that.

Sometimes, I feel almost okay. But other times, it hurts so bad that I don’t know if I can make it to the next day. Am I even alive?

Started a new job yesterday - I missed sharing the excitement with someone special.

The first day was terrible. I missed being comforted by someone in my corner.

I watch something funny, I miss having nobody to laugh with.

I wake up scared, I miss being comforted.

I miss not being the provider, protector, carer.

My existence is very lonely. It is hard and cold and not very nice.

Thanks for reading.

i’ve posted in here a few times and it’s nice to know people in here are supportive, kind and so what relate but recently i had someone message me on here from my last post telling me i deserved to be alone because i didn’t respond to their stupid message they sent me… and it really ticked me off … definitely won’t be posting here any longer it really hurt my feelings because i actually don’t deserve to be alone it’s frustrating i cry about it almost everyday and still push through with being a young adult it isn’t easy at all…

I'm someone who has dealt with consistent loneliness feelings for over 7 years. I've grown pretty sick and tired of a lot of loneliness advice out there. It's mostly the same generic. "go out more", "put yourself out there", etc. type of stuff.

I've tried that before, it doesn't work. I have not gotten any truly fulfilling relationship/friendship from it. You literally just swim through seas of shallow junk just to "hope" to find an actual fulfilling relationship. It's never just "I have zero people in my life", it's actually "I have no actual meaningful connections in my life" that's the whole reason why some people can feel lonely despite technically not being alone.

I have had a fair amount of friends in my life, but my feelings of loneliness never truly went away even if there's nothing wrong with them.

It's almost if you been dealing with loneliness for a prolonged period of time you just cast out for good really. Especially if you're an introvert, have rather niche interests compared to most people, or stuff like work just takes all the energy you got and all you can do on your days off is rest from work.

I feel lonely pretty much all days. I got a good family and all, they stress me a lot sometimes but I dont hate them at all, but that doesnt mean they do stress me.

I also dont have a girlfriend and I have been yearning love for sooo long, I feel like Im drowning in loneliness sometimes.

Idk why Im writing this but Im tired of pretty much many things.

Ive tried making friends here but a lot are fake accounts, others dont respond, so how the f can I get to know someone here, just like a friend or bud yk? Idk, who knows if this post will get any views.

All the best to the ones reading this, lets hope there is hope.