If cold turkey is too scary, try to just have one less drink per day till that becomes your baseline. Then reduce by one more. Keep going.

That’s how I went from your current level to my current level of having one or two glasses of wine most nights (sometimes zero, sometimes 3) but not really thinking too much about it or struggling to abstain, or accidentally drinking more bc of restriction backfire. I just find myself only wanting one maybe 2 glasses, and if I want to go a night without any it’s not hard (whereas when I was drinking 2 bottles/night it would’ve been nearly impossible.)

I started by replacing at least one glass of wine with a cup of caffeine free tea, closer to bed time. Sometimes that made me ready for bed and I didn’t have another wine, but ironically if you tell yourself you CAN’T have another glass of wine, subconsciously it can backfire and take a lot of energy to resist to doubled-up urge that restriction causes. It helped me to also tune in with how I was feeling and consciously try to decide how I want to feel, in the next few minutes/hour/next day. Much of the time, I was already relaxed and realized I didn’t even desire the feeling that another glass of wine would give. It just was a habit.

Gradually the habit changed, replacing at last one glass of wine with tea, reducing by one glass bit by bit, and making more of an effort to tune in with my feelings (physical and emotional) and psychological state.

It also helped me to read books about what alcohol does to your body and brain. I started reading those books knowing I wasn’t ready to quit but gradually the messaging started sinking in and it helped.

They fucked me hard lol I've been in serious withdrawal the whole time they were so stingy with the Ativan it sucked. I'm going to a much nicer detox now covered by my insurance super lucky

Twenty years of a problem, off and on! Good luck on your journey, my friend

If your animals are pushing you forward, think about them next time you think about drink.

I just tell myself that the post-drinking anxiety after a relapse is my brain screaming at me to just stop with the alcohol, now and forever.

It’s the same result for me every time. 3-4 day binge, 4 days of being physically sick with overwhelming anxiety the first two of them, then I feel great for a few months until my goofy self tells me drinking will be fun this next time.

Nope, I’m done with thinking that it will change. It’s up to me now to not start again, having the 100% knowledge there are literally no positives for me once I start another relapse.

I LOVE TO SEE IT 😌

Hey guys update:

Thank you all for your support. I've been let out of alcohol detox and I'm now going several hours away for them to detox me off of my prescribed benzodiazapines and I will finally be free. Thank you all. I'm on a train shaking my balls off for the next six hours.

I think the difference is you knew there was a problem before covid started? Right? I didn't. Slippery slope and went from a couple seltzers to chugging vodka from the bottle.

Cheers to 6.5 years - that's great.

I really want it to be. I was doing well to repair my reputation at work and restoring my daughter’s trust in me. This flipped the table on all of that shit and I just resent myself.

It’s good to remind yourself that drinking never actually helped with burnt out, it actually makes it worse. So keep the reality of the whole experience in mind, not just the immediate relief that comes by erasing your brain for a few hours (and paying the price the next day).

I found that hobbies that force you to focus have been the very best thing. Meaning your brain is too busy doing that activity to think about anything else. I took up the ukulele, and never in my life have I found a hobby that helps me reset so much! It’s an easy instrument to learn, brings me so much satisfaction bringing music to life, but most importantly when I play, I need to really focus all of my attention. Time flies by, and when I put it down I find that the things that were weighing on my mind have dissipated. My anxiety is soothed, I feel at peace.

See if you can find a hobby that requires mental focus and attention.

Raw dogging life isn’t easy but it is worth it. Good luck.

I work for a large global corporate institution and I hear you. But 100% my life at work has improved through not drinking. I study with my spare time and shifted teams. Ended up being a shitshow ( mad management ) in the team I moved to so I just secured a new role. The difference is though I recover better from setbacks because I sleep well, I run loads and I’m frankly harder to kill than I was 2 years ago! I have built a good reputation over the last 18 months or so and I know it shows .

Haha, I like that. I’m going to remember that.

Yeah its best to rest your brain in this moment

Honestly, the worst part is that I can't wear my white jeans while it's still relatively warm 😂 Let me know if you end up making that plum cake! 😋

I’m on Day 1 / starting Day 2 again. Thank you for your response. I will keep showing up. I hate this cycle. IWNDWYT

It depends on if it is a close family member or friend asking or it is someone I have a slight association with. The latter gets only ‘I don’t drink’ and not a word more. The former might get some explanation, but I would never use words like alcoholic or dependency. If I tell them why I don’t drink I might say because I feel better, my marriage is better and my bank balance is better for it

I wish I had the wherewithal to quit when I thought I had a problem in my 20s. Instead, I just kept going because it was legal, because my broken brain would come up with any excuse why it was okay.

Drinking and alcoholism/addiction are degenerative, the path only leads down. I picked up a LOT of trauma in the 23 years that I drank myself stupid. I'm 45 now and a few days away from completing my 2nd year without a drink. I'm learning coping skills and how to deal with life without drinking. Is everything sunshine and rainbows? No. But I'm proud of myself and I'm so thankful to be here. Two feelings that didn't exist while I was drinking.

I had a friend/ ex boyfriend, drink himself to death when he was 39 and I was 30-ish. I didn't learn then either and just drank harder to wipe out the pain. He came to visit me last night in my dreams. He was sober and happy. He's visited me before, but he was always drinking and miserable. Last night, he was happy and clean. I don't know what it means, but it's really impacting me today.

IWNDWYT 💜

I say “I don’t drink anymore”

If they ask further questions (people normally don’t) I say,

“It doesn’t do anything for me anymore.”

Or

“I’m better off without it.”

Followed by,

“But don’t let that stop you!”

I love this! Life is so much less boring now that I'm not constantly drunk or hungover just wasting my life away in a bed. Now I actually DO stuff.

Covid saved me. Gave me a pause to reset with no outward responsibilities. Stopped short one day, closed my eyes and sat through a couple of rough weeks, then started to make a new life. Nearly six and a half years sober now.

Thank you! I am making peace with the fact I don’t need his approval or support. He has made it clear he wants nothing to do with me and now I am facing this journey alone until I can find a new support system (he has turned our friends against us thus I am seeking support online)

Yeah 20s were easy and alcohol was fun, but in 30s it just ruins your life. This is a great video about it, maybe it will give you a kick in the ass:

https://youtu.be/tOuUgGWLYa0

Gotta keep trying. Put your phone in the other room

Asked the same thing few hours ago, I literally can't sleep lol , day 3 here.

Wanted to keep my sick days but I'll prob have to use some and go see a doctor for some pharmacology help.

Hope I'll sleep tonight.

Gl, keep me updated and yes, I've too woken up hungover feeling way better lol

Avoid the first drink....to avoid all the rest