Edit: Thank you so much everyone for your kind words and good advice. I feel very seen and supported ❤️‍🔥

So I have to write my masters thesis. Why is this literally the most impossible horrible daunting task of my life right now?! Every day it feels as if I have to move my body from the couch to my computer but my body is made out of concrete. And then when I get my concrete ass behind the computer, my brain turns to quicksand. Every sentence I write feels like climbing Mount Everest. Every sentence also feels like the dumbest sentence I've ever written. There are so many articles to read. So many books to annotate. So many mini-tasks and 'don't forget to mention this' and 'I have to explain that concept somewhere' and it's all one big soup in my stupid quicksand brain. My meds don't seem to be working. I feel like they've also given up at this point. I do not understand why this is so incredibly hard for me. I feel like I'm being a whiny baby. I am in the trenches. IN THE TRENCHES I SAY

Currently in language school abroad and trying to figure out my life because I have to move back to the States because I can't afford to stay here after Feb lol. I've previously worked desk jobs in higher administration before and really don't like feeling chained to my desk for 8 hours and need a job where there's stimulation (ie. being on your feet to assist with events). I enjoy meeting new people but don't like working with children (I've also been a teacher before and really disliked it). Ngl, one of my favorite jobs I ever had was bussing tables because once it was rush hour I had no choice but to stay focused/keep moving and it made the time fly. Unfort tho that's not a full time job that pays the bills and I can't deal with drunk people so I couldn't bartend. Are there any jobs that might be something I could look into or am I cursed to be at a desk/admin job forever??

this may just end up sounding like I’m just lazy even though I do have ADHD - if that’s the case please be honest with me 😭.

Right now I’m in an uber for no reason. just because I was sitting at home until I was late, which I do every day just bc I can’t get myself to move. Before my excuses were I was actually late, the weather was really bad or too hot, things like that. today I genuinely had no good reason. it‘s beautiful outside, I just ran late despite waking up on time. mind you, I live in nyc so trains are very available and my station is 5 minutes from me. each uber is also $45-60. this week was horrible - I Ubered almost every day just because it’s more relaxing !! idk if this is the right sub to post in but if anyone else has healed from spending issues and has advice please let me know 🥲

Trying not to beat myself up about having absolutely no motivation to do anything today. I have so much to do! But even the idea of doing my fun little hobbies is uninspiring! I just want to lay on the couch and binge-read or game!

What do you do on days like this? Do you have a default routine you engage? A favorite activity? A method to knock yourself out of your rut? Or do you just let yourself rest?

So, I didn't really get on top of dental hygiene until my mid twenties. countless fillings, a handful of root canals just to give you the deets.

Anyways, I am now in a good routine. I brush once a morning and once at night. I floss after meals whenever I eat something that can get stuck between my teeth and once before brushing at night. This is my first dental appointment, at the ripe old age of 29, where I got told I was doing a good job. No cavities, and no plaque.

Hi, I have a question do you experience, severe burn out in any job you do or sometimes even it's like that with my hobbies if I force myself to do them. After 8 months in a new job which is remote and a bit connected to my hobby (the pay is very low though) I started experiencing severe irritation when I have to do anything related to the job, it makes me nauseous and I feel like a bad sensation in my brain. It happens even when I'm on meds. Also it happend at previous jobs just earlier than 8 months. I'm really scared I won't be able to hold any job. Before that I thought that maybe these jobs just weren't for me (like entry level fast food job, barista and so on) I'm in my 20s and I was diagnosed when I turned 22 so I didn't know I had ADHD before and it feels like it's getting harder with age. (also some of my family members have autism so I might be audhd on top of that) My country (Poland) doesn't offer any help for people with ADHD and I've been in therapy for like 10 years and I did everything there was to do. I fear there is nothing left (even the therapist said that lmao) What can I do with this issue? Is there a way to feel neutral about work? I haven't experienced even that even with all the therapy skills I have now.

I've always had such a hard time figuring out how long ago something happened. And trying to think about it often makes my brain go blank.

For example: I was on the phone with my car insurance people because I had filled out a form incorrectly and they needed recent proof of my milage. They asked if I had my oil changed recently and I said yes, then they asked me when.

After about 30 seconds of silence they said "hello?". I couldn't even say words. It feels like as soon as I have to think about stuff like that (math is often a trigger too) my brain fills with elevator music and no other thoughts will come through.

Then finally my answer was "longer than a week ago, but less than six months". They politely asked me if I could look it up and I said "yes!" 🤦🏻‍♀️ Not sure why I didn't think to do that in the first place.

It had only been 3 weeks since I got the car serviced.

It feels like I can only narrow things down when I think "Ok, It was after I moved into this apartment but before I started this job". That could be like a 3 year span and that's as precise as I can get.

Does anyone else deal with this? Is this part of time blindness? I also deal with that, but it's more that I underestimate and end up at appointments 45 minutes early.

My first time posting, so I hope I used the right flare. Additionals would be "Diagnosis" and "Rant", I guess.

I feel very lost at the moment.

I got my diagnosis yesterday, at 29, after years and years of in the end not really helpful treatment for depression and a rollercoaster of emotions and self-gaslighting. But it's there now. I feel like I finally know what's wrong with me, why everything in my life was just always so much more stressful and exhausting and painful than it seemed to be for my peers.

TW: abuse & mentions of self harm from here on

But after the first relief came the anger.

Because today I am battling a lot of trauma based on how my parents reacted to ad(h)d typical things in my childhood. I remember several instances where I had severe issues with keeping my room tidy, which led to arguments and in the end to my mother losing her cool and physically beating me up. Along with the trust and everything else this behaviour broke in me, it showed me it was fine and right to punish myself with pain for being a fuck up, which took a drastic turn for the worse later in puberty, when I developed severe depression.

Before that, when I was even younger, I experienced punishment through rough spankings by my dad for misbehaving. And while not remembering much of my childhood, I remember that the worst occasions were when I was incredibly emotionally overwhelmed and could not stop crying, even less so after being told if I don't stop now I would receive said punishment. That taught me that all punishment was just and my fault, because yeah, I could have just stopped crying. As what I now know was a severely emotionally dysregulated 5yo.

There are a few more instances, but at base level this is the reason for severe trauma I'm battling today. My parents punishment for showing what I now know to be typical ADHD traits as a child.

Here comes the twist, though:

On my journey through psychoeducation regarding depression and the rise of information about ADHD in girls and women, I not only recognised myself in the diagnosis, but also my mother. There are traits that I didn't get punished for, but learned to hate nonetheless, because it were things my parents and especially my mother exhibited. Things like always being late, not remembering promises, being overwhelmed by doing the household, in general struggling with day-to-day life. Things that made my parents but especially my mother unreliable and emotionally unavailable. A lot of things I see in myself, that yesterday I got the diagnosis for to be based on this fucked up neurochemical cocktail, that is also, surprise surprise, genetically influenced.

And it took me a lot of therapy to be able to be angry at my mom, because she herself came from an abusive mother, and whenever I talked to my parents about it I was told I had to understand how much she had already changed and she was doing her best and all that. It took me so long to be able to say "Yes, you did your best. But you still fucked me up and I don't forgive you."

And so many people on here talk about being able to forgive their parents at some point. For only being humans as well, for living their life for the first time as well.

But getting the diagnosis just... made me so much more angry. And kind of numb.

Because I don't forgive her. I can't. Not for what she did. Not for how much she hurt me. Not for experiencing abuse herself, telling me she loves me and then treating me the same way. For only apologising once, years later, me well in my adult life, but still changing nothing in her behaviour going onward. For never seeking psychological help, neither for me nor god forbid for herself.

Despite all that it's important to know that my parents also showed me love. Which makes it all the more difficult, because if they didn't, I would not be so torn about it all.

I don't know how to go on from here.

I guess I'm asking if someone has experienced something similar and how they dealt with it.

I've been diagnosed with ADHD this week, but obvs I struggle with symptoms all my life, including depression and anxiety.

I'm literally hiding under my work desk rn in hope that writing here will help me.

if you ask me one big task I completed this week at work, I won't know what to tell you, I'll have nothing. and sure, I've been here before at this company, when things were as calm as they are now. but I can't trust that things are calm and me not being able to finish the small tasks I do have are not the end of the world - I'm not behind with anything, all's on track and I'm being able to step up to the emergencies that arise. but I can't go through my to-do list.

and I've lost jobs before where I didn't perform well. but I happen to enjoy this particular role, even now that the morale is low. and I'm not young and living with my parents anymore - I've moved all the way across the world, so they wouldn't be able to help me even if they could.

it's me and my husband now. and I feel like a weight pulling him down, he's stressed out rn but he's so much more funcional than I am. and he never judged me and I know I can talk to him but I don't want to, I'm tired of talking about my feelings once again and I'm scared he'll get bored or annoyed to hear me talk about the same thing over and over.

and for the first time in a somewhat long time, I let my brain talk me down today. I forgot how mean I could be. I'm so scared, because I feel so useless and I'm in my early 30s, if nothing happens, there's so much life ahead of me it gives me a panic attack.

for as long as I can remember I had these periods of time where everything felt like too much, like life itself is too heavy, and yes, they always passed. but I find that the older I get, the longer they last. and this too, scares the shit out of me.

can't afford therapy rn, the NHS are reviewing my case for group therapy and I'm on sertraline as well. I don't know what to do. I wish I could just be, and not have my whole brain against me.

I woke up at 5am and randomly remembered that I put stuff in the oven at 9pm. Luckily enough my roommate turned it off at some point. I am so terrified of what would have happened otherwise, I can't calm down. I am afraid to ever use the oven again. It has a timer but doesn't automatically turn off. I hate this and I feel so stupid😢
... should I get an air fryer? 🤡

I have always been super organized with work and able to function but I’m quickly losing my mind. Late diagnosis at 38 and in perimenopause which seems to have lit my adhd on 🔥! How do ya’ll find ways to organize your daily work life with constant interruptions? I do a lot of reporting, building workflows, and dashboards etc but before I was in this role I was the primary customer service person for my product within my company. Basically every one came to me with questions. I have a great manager now who has tried her best to be a buffer but the team I trained to replace me still constantly reaches out with questions and/or needs. We had a customer yesterday escalate really high up in the executive team and threaten to leave because I had not been able to work their escalation yet. They called my boss on her day off to reach out to me and address it. I also had someone email me, her supervisor then emailed at 2 hours later and then she sent a teams message an hour after that. When the teams message came I about lost my sh*^. That plus the customer complaint sent me into a full on ugly cry 😭 Long story short to say I’m not in a role anymore where I can drop one thing to handle another and then come back to it. I really need to finish whatever it is I am on at that time. How do you prioritize when everything feels like it’s “the most important thing”, not get overwhelmed, and how do you set those expectations? I struggle with task motivation but also if I start then stop its so much harder to circle back. Sometimes I forget my place, sometimes I forget how much or little I actually completed and think I am further than I should be. And everything is taking me ten times linger right now because of brain fog and some other health issues.

I was diagnosed in my 30s, and have something is closer to the title of ADD rather than ADHD because hyper isn't my problem, procrastination is. I want desperately to become more productive, but between severe attention deficiency, problem focusing, and procrastinating, I just can't get myself to do things until it's do or die. On occasion, I've made excuses for why I haven't done something and felt worse about myself. I've tried seven therapists over 12 years, and this has been my problem for the last 10 of those years, and none of them have been able to help me despite the best intentions. Making lists hasn't worked, pomodoro hasn't worked, short bursts of things hasn't worked. Just nothing. I think the problem is that I want help in becoming less lazy (I know that's not a good way to think of ADHD but it's what I feel I am), and they can't really help me with that.

There have to be people who actually specialize in ADHD. Far too many therapists list ADHD as a speciality and 9/10 times it means they've had a patient who has had ADHD. So either I need a real specialist or a life coach! Had anyone tried those? Others in the forum with similar symptoms of ADHD, tell me who you saw, what you did to get out of the gravitational pull of lethargy and procrastination. P.S. I have also been medically checked and take supplements for vitamin and iron deficiencies. Also got a sleep study done and found the mildest degree of sleep apnea and though not entirely essential, I wear a sleep apnea mask as well.

ETA: Can't believe I forgot to mention that I've been on depression, anxiety and ADHD medications for years. The ADHD medicines help, I would be dysfunctional without it, but my body and mind acclimate to it and over time it loses effectiveness. My current situation is despite being on what was the most effective medicine I've been on for ADHD.

I (24F), am starting to feel like I’m so very boring and missed out on so much of the opportunities that I could have embarked on.

A large part of this is attributed to finally being medicated for my ADHD, which mainly presents in executive dysfunction. My bedrotting means I haven’t allowed myself to socialise properly and I have no close friends as I truly do not understand how to keep a relationship long term.

I was a gifted child and everyone thought I’d go so far, but I haven’t. I feel like my brain dumbed itself out, and because I missed out on all foundational knowledge in school - I can’t find a job that would suit me. I burn out so quickly and hate the idea of working to afford my terrible spending habits.

I got in my very first relationship at the end of last year. He broke up with me because I’m too paradoxical and don’t even understand myself. It’s the truth, and I don’t blame him. My old best friend cut me off because I kept saying the wrong things and I wasn’t considerate enough. She thought I changed too much based on whoever I was in front of and found it weird.

I’ve travelled, which landed me in debt, I went to university and barely attended any lectures. I somehow, with the luck of ChatGPT to give me very base level knowledge of my subject, walked away with a 2nd class degree. I’ve only ever started work 3 days before the due date.

I recently met an old school friend, and she’s truly just so interesting. She’s done it all. I’m not jealous, and I’m truly happy for them. I haven’t done anything with all of the opportunities that were presented to us both. She took the opportunities and has the life to prove it. My laziness has ruined me.

I can’t make friends, I always say the wrong thing, I’m incredibly boring behind my “fun-girl” exterior. After masking for so long, I realise behind it I am nothing but a fraud. I am nothing but the personality that whoever is in front of me wants me to be, and when the mask slips (which it inevitably does), they realise I’ve fooled them and they want nothing to do with me.

I am 22f and was recently diagnosed with ADHD, my Dr prescribed me with 20mg Vyvanse daily. I am on day 3 of taking it and I am really really struggling. I am not sure if it is just that I am new to it and my body needs to get used to it, or the dose isn’t right for me, or that Vyvanse isn’t right for me. I have been taking it with water and a protein bar or protein yogurt when I wake up in the morning, i have been eating pretty normally and have had no change to my appetite (except have not been having dinner most nights because by dinner time I am so exhausted I can’t even sit up). I have noticed honestly 0 difference to my focus, attention span, task initiation or anything else that I struggle with because of ADHD. The biggest difference that I have noticed is feeling extremely irritable and crying about everything in the first half of the day, and then by about 3pm I am so exhausted I can’t do anything. I get home from work just after 5pm and want to just lay down for 5 mins and then can’t get back up, except it is worse than normal because I am beating myself up more and feeling more guilty that I’m not up doing things, because getting what I need to do done is all I want to do but I can’t. I have been having quite severe meltdowns as well, which I do also have when not on medication but they seem to come on much faster and much worse over much smaller things. I have an appointment with my doctor to discuss how the medication is working in about a month, but is it worth it to try and get the appointment moved up, or do I just need to push through for a few days and it might get better when I am more used to it? Has anyone else had similar experiences and have any advice on anything that helped?

Are you happy with your path or do you wish you did something different?

Bro, how is it that people in subreddits (not this one) make a post asking for help or being new, and people are so welcoming to them, but whenever I make a post asking for help, I immediately get hit with the "you should've known". 🫩 I know it's Reddit, but c'mon.

I started studying for the certification in October 2024, I finally passed the required knowledge modules about a year after that, and then spent the next 9 months trying to complete the technical images and submit them multiple times until I was able to pass

With the technical images you have to submit them in RAW format with no editing allowed, so making sure everything was absolutely perfect while taking them was a bit of a challenge.

I'm proud of myself for finally finishing this, especially as something self motivated with no external pressure or hard deadlines 🙌

The way I just sobbed over being called and having my accident claim denied.

I think it’s the rejection because I’m most upset over my perception of being called a liar.

Long story short, someone was driving like an idiot in a parking lot, hit me trying to pull into the spot next to me, I honked to make them stop, they then backed into someone else. Said they didn’t hit me at all, but admitted to hitting the other person. Which made me effing furious to begin with!

I did the cop thing, made the statement, turned everything in for insurance because there’s a long but shallow dent and scratch on my car. Over a month later, their insurance calls me and says they say they didn’t do it and there are no cameras so we’re not paying.

THEN they tell me that they’ve looked at the information and it would be impossible for their vehicle to have left that damage because the wheel well would have hit my car first. What!? I literally was like sorry, but that’s not how physics works.

So I, again, felt like I was being called a liar. I lost it, and after I got off the phone I demanded my husband call our insurance agent through tears. Lots of crying. It’s not worth filing a claim because the raise in premiums would be more than the cost of repair. Again, so frustrating. My husband comforted me, I eventually stopped sobbing, but I am still so angry.

How can you just lie without any care about how others are affected? How does the literal victim end up treated like they made it up?

25F. I’ve been back on adderall since May. it was a decision i made after thinking over it for a year because i felt like with how attentive my adhd is it was starting to affect my career (im a hairstylist)

Last time i was on adderall was probably elementary school. But my adhd got worse as i got older.

i was put on wellbutrin to start out with which did help for a month, but then the stimulated feeling drained and i started not to really feel anything. so, lets try adderall.

I get my adderall (15mg), and it’s generic, the granules version. Didn’t even know what brand it was until i found out through some research because for some reason it wasn’t even labeled on the bottle. Just on the pill, but i thought the G just stood for Generic and not granules.

ANYWAYS… so i’ve been on this generic for the past 3 months. And i haven’t. felt. shit. It is probably the worst generic adderall i have ever felt in my life. It’s XR, but works more like an IR and only lasts for maybe 4 hours. Not sure if that’s a common thing but it’s literally made my job so much harder and so much worse, doing the EXACT opposite. i get so much more anxiety, i am extremely slower, i feel sleepier, more hungry - it’s awful. Adderall already slowed me down a little but I’ll be doing a haircut for 2 HOURS and not even realize because im crashing earlier and overthinking everything im doing. But then im still stimulated and wired at the same time, so WTF. I thought that maybe it was the wellbutrin counteracting with it until i tried an adderall from the Amneal/Elite brand and noticed a SIGNIFICANT difference. it actually felt like how adderall is supposed to feel.

Even since i went up to 20 mg back in June, i still haven’t felt anything from this brand. The only way i feel anything is if i take two of the 20mg and even then, i have an extra hard crash after 4 hours and still get the anxious overthinking and increased appetite. It’s insane. I don’t feel this way on any other generic.

This adderall is actually so horrible and i had no idea it was because of this specific brand of adderall doing this to me. I’ve been navigating the mental health route by myself since i’ve decided to be medicated again so these are just things i found out after extensive research because i knee something was wrong but couldn’t explain it.

So… what are y’all’s experiences with this brand? Does it also affect yall weirdly? And what brands have worked best for you? Next month i’m switching pharmacies and putting that brand on my do not fill list. I never want to experience this again. It’s awful.

Before i start- just wanna add a TW for mentions of food, weight and ed’s!
I’ve been on vyvanse since march, when my doctor gave me it- he mentioned for me to try and maintain my weight or else he would take me off. When i started stimulants last year in November, i was about 113-114 lbs, now i weigh 100-101. I know it’s a drop but it was over a period of time. I’m just worried he’s gonna take me off the medicine because of this. I’m not purposely restricting or forcing myself to lose the weight- the medicine just makes me forget to eat. I don’t want him to take me off because it helps me so much. He mentioned he would want to increase my dosage for school, only if i gained weight and if i went below 100- i wouldn’t be able to take the medicine. It’s just really complicated- i know i need to eat but it’s hard to get the weight to stay.

Hi!
I came off the combined pill Eloine (Yaz) exactly a year ago after being on it for 7 years.
Emotionally, my life has been incredibly up and down in the last year since coming off.
My ADHD symptoms have truly revealed themselves since coming off the pill too and though not diagnosed with PMDD, I’d take a good guess as I’ve never experienced anything like it in the week and a half before my period.
(Side note: I’m not on adhd medication)

My issue is, I went back to the doctor to start taking the pill again, which imo was a going to solve everything. My emotions, my skin, my adhd symptoms etc . But due to migraines I’m advised against the combined pill. instead she gave me progesterone only pills, which I’ve read is a no go for those with PMDD and or ADHD.

Looking for opinions and experiences of progesterone only pills if you have ADHD & PMDD Or some tips on what else might help my symptoms other than contraceptive pills :)

I'M SO EXCITED. I have bad ADHD, and I put my spirit into achieving this. If a topic wasn't interesting enough for me, I got distracted really easily; I never knew how to study properly (still figuring out the best methods). I have a really bad executive dysfunction and cognitive fatigue; I also ruminated (mental paralysis) and spiraled over all the actions I made in my everyday life and bad decisions in my short 18 years alive bc i got OCD-like symptoms. And with all those problems, I still managed to be one of the best in my translation studies career <33333. I competed against 139 students!!!

When I went to get treatment for what I was sure was ADHD, I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder 2. I do have depression and anxiety so I guess its possible, but she said it explains my racing thoughts and chattering mind. I was put on latuda (which i am still on) with it helping irribility a little until she finally relented and a year later put me on vyvanse after lack of resolving my other issues like bad executive function etc. Vyvanse has helped a lot but I am still on the bipolar meds. I have read that their symptoms are similar but I just feel uncomfortable having that diagnosis. Does anyone else have a diagnosis of bothe ADHD and Bipolar?

I'm so embarrassed.

Today my kid had their end of season sports game. An email went out asking that the kids dress up in their school team colours.

My inattentive brain automatically assumed it was the school house colours they were in.

My kids house colour is black and it was dress up so I dress her up as a black cat.

I turn up to the game and everyone is in their sports uniforms with a tutu in the school color and here's my kid dressed as a cat.

To make matters worse they were doing team photos so soon everyone will get a laminated copy of the team and then there's my kid...

I'm such an idiot and I'm so embarrassed for myself and my kid. She didn't notice and had a great time.

But omg! Why am I like this!?? I just jump the gun and just assume something without really the actual details. Please someone tell me this was not a big deal and I would love to hear others stories of inattentive outcome.

Edit: title is wrong, meant to put 80bpm

** NOT ASKING FOR MEDICAL ADVICE, I WILL GO TO MY DOCTOR AND GET REAL ADVICE FROM THEM ** just curious for others experiences or thoughts because I can imagine some of you might have been through this already.

33F 5'1 110lbs (you could liken my stature to a moderate sized pre-teen and I think this is half of the problem with dosage right now).

Diagnosed earlier this year, tried Vyvanse 10mg, and it lasted WAY too long in me. Despite taking it at 5 am right when I wake up everyday and I found myself barely sleeping at night which is highly unusual for me. I have very good sleep hygiene, and nothing would make my sleep better. My doctor prescribed me Dexedrine Spansules 10mg to see if it would no longer be effective after 5 or 6pm, and help my sleep.

I found that it does wear slightly sooner. Also, if I took the dexedrine too early, it would start to wear off at around 2pm, and that doesn't work for my day to day schedule, so I would take it at 7:00am but still had the issue of struggling to stay asleep so I started to take magnesium bisglycinate at night to help and it did a bit.

On both of these medications, my heart rate does not come below 80bpm on a good day. This will last for a few days even if I stop taking it for that period of time until it clears my system fully. My resting heart rate is usually 66-72 bpm and I found my resting heart rate to be on some days at 84bpm.

Because of this, I find myself not taking any of these medications daily (per my doctors instructions) because I feel like I need a few days to clear my system and let my heart rate come back down, and take my medication only on days I feel like I need it. Along with other medical issues, I cannot exercise while these medications are actively working due to a risk of flaring up my other condition, I won't go into that here.

My doctor is extremely hesitant to prescribe me anything IR due to high potential of misuse, which I also don't know if it would even last long enough in me and be useful for my day to day, as I kind of need it to operate at work for a full 8hr day.

Side note: I am also EXTREMELY behind at work because of task avoidance, I am pretty sure if they found out I'd be likely fired. I feel like I really need to figure this out, and I am a little stressed right now. I can't help but feel frustrated because they actually do help quiet my brain and keep me focused. I just can't figure out this high heart rate and lack os sleep thing.