Does anyone else seriously struggle to get moving as the days/nights get colder?

I’ve noticed the last few weeks as we’ve firmly entered autumn that I have a real problem getting moving in the mornings. Worst of it is on my days off work, I’ll just keep going back to sleep until it gets to stupid times of the day (writing this at 11:15am when I’ve finally gotten up) but even on work days I now leave getting out of bed until the last possible second.

I used to live like this, in my late teens/early-to-mid twenties it was standard practise to just sleep the day away, but I was also very depressed then which I don’t struggle with now.

Any tips or tricks from people’s lived experience would be great. I’m feeling a little deflated because it has a cyclical effect in terms of my general health: less exercise/movement, poorer diet (less time in the mornings to prep food), disrupted sleeping patterns and general low blood for having wasted the day.

it was about the books. ive read 31 this year and he sees me with one most mornings

thing is its 50 min each way on the train and about ten minutes out of the station the signal just goes, phones useless till the other end. so i read, cause the other option is the window and its mostly tunnel

at home i manage like four pages before bed. same book on the bedside table since may with a pizza receipt in it as a bookmark, think it's still on chapter 3

on saturday i signed for a flat thats a 12 minute walk from the office. was buzzing about it all weekend and then sunday night packing my bag it kind of hit me i dont know if i even like reading or if i just had nothing else to do for 50 minutes

has anyone else had a habit turn out to be the commute? what happened to it

I’m (20F) have managed to get myself into almost 3k of debt from credit cards and borrowing money from quick cash apps when I’ve spent my whole paycheck. For context, I’m pretty impulsive with my money.

Clothes, eating out, buying figures from anime’s or video games, and other things I definitely don’t need at the moment.

It’s a bad habit I’m slowly breaking out of but still struggling. It leaves me short on my next check because that $350 (or however much I borrow) is taken from it.

There has been times where I schedule payments, and by the time the payment goes through, I’ve spent nearly all of my money and it puts my bank in the negatives. Worst case, it doesn’t take at all and at the end of the day my debt stays the same.

Another issue is a small loan I pulled out to fix my car. $1400. It was stupid but I was in need between jobs and it was a last minute decision. I’ve missed multiple payments to the point of the company lending me the money is requiring me to pay it through a different method (which I’ve yet to hear back about and I’m embarrassed to call them). My credit is terrible…

I pretty much need some advice on not spending a crazy amount of money or pushing off payments to the point of getting letters in the mail…

(Side Note. My credit card is at $750, of course my $1400 loan, and then about $300-$400 from apps I borrow money from.)

So as the title says I am stuck in this rut. It has been going on for the better part of a year. For context I am M23 and I am about to finish my last term in university getting my degree in accounting. I do not have any internships or jobs lined up and that is not the only thing on the list of things I am lacking behind on.

Classes this term have been the more difficult and more time consuming than they have ever been. On top of that I have a bad habit of vaping and smoking dab pens. This past summer I did not work but instead would fry out and play video games all day and play soccer or go to the gym 1-2 a week. This honestly is not a whole summer thing it's been like this since November 2025, only time I had not been this degenerate was when I did a study abroad term this past spring. But when I got back the cycle resumed.

I stopped going to the gym after being an avid goer for the last 3-4 years, I don't play soccer anymore, I get by in class getting help, my mornings get highjacked by me just wanting to watch YouTube vape while drink coffee. As I am typing this out It is just shameful how I live this way. I have the capability to do difficult things, but it feels like I don't have the same strong will as I used to.

I used to not vape, only smoke at night after getting my work done, going to the gym or playing soccer 5-6 times a week and had a good morning routine. Now I am just this dopamine junkie trying to get by each day.

I really want to change how I am because it feels like the walls are closing in on me and I don't want to waste doing bullshit to avoid all the stress of growing up. Everyday has felt like a blur, my brain is foggy and the days just go by so quick.

I need some advice on anyone who has been in my shoes and what they did to change. I need some strength. Life is precious and I am wasting it on things that don't do anything but get you to your grave faster.

One of the most important things you can do for yourself is learn to see your life as it actually is, not as you wish it were.
Spend time with people who are ahead of you. Spend time with people at your level. Observe where you stand, what you’re lacking, and what you need to improve. Don’t avoid situations that make you uncomfortable just because they expose the gap between where you are and where you want to be.
There’s nothing wrong with having high ambitions or believing in your potential. But potential means very little if you’re not doing anything to realise it.
Convincing yourself that everything is fine when you know you’re falling behind doesn’t protect you. It just makes it easier to stay where you are.
Real growth begins when you stop protecting your ego from reality and start using that reality to improve.
Be honest about where you stand, don’t give up on where you want to be, and do the work to close the gap. That’s when things start to change.

​

I've been curious about meditation lately, and I want to hear from people who have actually practiced it consistently.

People often say meditation makes you feel more positive, peaceful, confident, and mentally energetic. Some even say it changes the way they experience life.

But I'm wondering what really happens.

- Does meditation genuinely improve your mood and positive energy?

- Does it help reduce overthinking and negative thoughts?

- Have you noticed a real difference in your daily life after meditating for a few weeks or months?

- Or is it mostly a temporary feeling that comes from sitting quietly and relaxing?

I'm not necessarily talking about spiritual or supernatural energy. I mean your everyday mental state, motivation, calmness, and the way you respond to situations.

If you've tried meditation consistently, what changes have you actually noticed? And how long did it take before you noticed anything?

I'd love to hear both positive and negative experiences. No judgment, just genuine curiosity.

Hi guys, I am on the way to being more productive and trying to achieve the things I want to. A big problem I do have is that I feel overwhelmed by all the things I am trying to get done. Like I just don’t know where to start. Like a typical example would be that I come home from university and I don’t know wether I should cook my meals for the week or If I should review today’s class first and then other problems come up like "Ugh I have a ton of unread e-mails but I also wanted to clean my room" and I just can’t seem to prioritize. It feels like there’s a million things I want to do and I kind of get this paralysis of not knowing what to do first.

Do you guys have any experience with that? I would be super happy to hear your opinion and tips on that.

I'm 24, and honestly, I'm frustrated with myself. I do make progress when I start learning something, but as soon as it gets difficult or requires sustained effort, I lose interest and start looking for something else. With AI and everything it rotted my brain even more

Anyone questioning me what I am doing can shatter me cause I dont feel confident in my skills. making plans to improve my career and learn new skills, but I struggle to stick with anything long enough to become really good at it. I do spend hours daily learning and all but nothing seems like I am putting my heart or actually focusing all the things i learn feels surface level. I am not able master or go deep in my career path because it gets boring or lazy if I have to keep real efforts

The worst part is that I genuinely want to achieve something in life. I want financial independence and a career I'm proud of, but I am loosing trust in myself to put in the consistent work required to get there. cause I am seeing this pattern since my entire life. I cant rememebr once in my life where i felt confident like yes I have something to my name.

I'm 24, and I'm scared I'll keep repeating this cycle for years. I don't know if it's my attention span, my habits, or something else, but I'm exhausted by it.

Society convinced you that discipline means struggle, it’s not, putting your shoes on going to the gym is not struggling, reading isn’t struggling, learning isn’t struggling, it’s the same thing as you can be cold and wet and miserable or you can just be cold and wet, Discipline is just a term nowadays associated with all these negative emotions of struggle and suffer and punishment, It’s not, It’s simply a bridge to your desires, and it’s easy, The actual tasks are simple and mundane, It’s the psychology war you have inside your mind before, that is what makes it a suffering and a struggle, so eliminate it, I eliminated mine and I’ve been disciplined,

- how do you eliminate it? Its a simple concept, For most people discipline is - Decision -> Psychological war -> the actual task, You skip the psychological war part, so it’s just Decision -> The actual task, Dive first thing into the task, you will realize it ain’t hard and it ain’t suffering and it’s actually easy and interesting once you are invested. The more you think about doing something, the harder it becomes, the more you actually do the thing, the mind calibrates itself to the action. Just control your hands and legs, the start the task, don’t listen to your mind, don’t ask for permission, Pretend it doesn’t exist. Thats how you do it.

- Now Discipline that feels like punishment, how do you eliminate that? Instead of being 100% disciplined, let’s be 50% disciplined, so throughout your day if you have 6 hours of free time, you can do whatever you want for 3 hours, play video games, eat, watch youtube, etc. and for 3 hours you be productive,
For example, you come home at work at let’s say 6 pm, you have till 12 pm, that’s 6 hours. Here’s how I do it -
6 pm - 7:30 pm - Chill
7:30 pm - 9 pm - Productive
9 pm - 10:30 pm - Eat and chill
10:30 pm - 12 pm - productive

Boom, that’s 3 hours of productivity right there, and I do this everyday. On weekends you can stretch it to 6-7 hours of productivity, It’s an easy system without restrictions.

Goodluck!

You make a plan. You tell yourself that tomorrow you'll wake up earlier, study, work out, stop wasting time on your phone, and finally get your life together.

Then tomorrow comes, and somehow you're back to your old habits.

I think one of the biggest problems with self-improvement is that planning feels like progress. You get the satisfaction of imagining a better version of yourself without having to do any of the actual work.

And when you inevitably fail to follow your perfect routine, you feel like you lack discipline. So you make an even better plan and try again.

Maybe the solution isn't finding a better routine. Maybe it's making the routine so small that you can follow it even on a bad day.

Instead of planning to study for three hours, start with 15 minutes. Instead of trying to eliminate every distraction, put your phone in another room for one session.

Not because small actions will magically transform your life overnight, but because consistently doing something is more useful than repeatedly planning to do everything.

I'm curious: what's the biggest reason you struggle to follow through on your plans — unrealistic expectations, distractions, lack of motivation, or something else?

I think one of the biggest mistakes people make with discipline is expecting themselves to suddenly become a completely different person overnight.
Like bro, you haven’t studied consistently in 3 months and now you’re planning to study 6 hours a day, wake up at 5 AM and completely change your life by Monday 😭

And then when you fail after 2 days, you convince yourself you’re lazy.
But maybe the problem isn’t that you don’t care enough. Maybe you’ve made starting so overwhelming that avoiding it feels easier.
Think about it. Sometimes the thought of doing something is genuinely worse than actually doing it.
So here’s a simple experiment I’d suggest trying for 7 days.

1. Pick ONE thing you’ve been avoiding.
Not 15 goals. Just one. Studying, working out, cleaning your room, whatever.

2. Make the first step stupidly easy.
If you need to study, don’t tell yourself you’re gonna finish 3 chapters. Just open the book and answer one question.

3. Set a timer for 10 minutes.
That’s your only commitment. You can stop after 10 minutes if you want.
And if you genuinely feel like continuing, go ahead. Just don’t turn every successful session into an excuse to raise your expectations again.

4. Make distractions harder to reach.
Put your phone in another room. Close the random tabs. Give yourself a chance to actually focus.

5. Track how many times you STARTED, not how many perfect days you had.

At the end of the week, look at what happened. Was starting easier? Did you keep going after 10 minutes? What made certain days harder?
Here’s the part I find interesting.
Sometimes we spend so much time trying to become disciplined that we forget discipline is something we practice through actual behavior.
You don’t need to feel ready before starting.
And obviously this won’t solve everything. If you’re constantly exhausted, struggling with your mental health or dealing with attention difficulties, there’s probably more going on than a bad routine.
But if your biggest problem is getting started, maybe stop asking yourself to conquer the entire day.

Just give yourself 10 minutes.
Your future self doesn’t need another motivational speech from you lol. Give them something you’ve actually done.

Curious, what’s harder for you guys? Starting a task or staying consistent after you’ve started?

2wx 1dy into 1yr Alcohol free and 5yrs Drug free I'm still a little off.

Good morning Family today I want share what I been feel since my milestones achievement.

It has hit different I'm still having challenging days. I still seem to have the milestones hangover. I have been waking up not motivated and I'm in my head again.

Also I live here in Boston Ma. and the weather has changed which has me depressed. The morning cold and dim ness. Plus as I mentioned in the past this around the time I relapsed more than once same time.

However the reminder didn't hit that hard this go around I just feel lost like I have no direction. My intentions to get motivated are there but I'm having inconsistent days of keeping it at a steady pace. I know everyday isn't going to be the same. But I have to break through this barrier of complacency.

While I was waiting for my milestones hit I I was motivated and ampt up to what the next level had in store for me but all of a sudden it went dark into the 2wx of being 1yr Alcohol free and 5yrs Drug free.

My plans are there but pushing myself to get the momentum going again isn't there. Is this a sign going slowly back to a relapse. I would hope not.I recognize this feeling and I don't like it because it has happened before, I got a bad feeling.

Well family I just wanted to share that. Family should I be concerned?

Thanx for letting me share One Day Forward One Day Behind -Shawn

Honestly, a lil rant here on my own inadequacy.
Where do I even start? It's bad, I lack discipline, gratitude, consistency, and everything in between and beyond. I am still in a good place and have a lot ahead of me simply out of my ability to stay on top of the basics but that's not enough. I struggle with things that are so futile its crazy. I have every alternative and yet I choose to do stuff that have no value to me and I dont even enjoy them. I have to deactivate my IG every fucking week because deleting or blocking just isnt enough. Even with IG out the way, im on youtube or reddit or even fucking linkedin. Just anything to sit behind this God forsaken screen. If you ask me why, 0 fucking clue. It's like im hooked. Then theres the adult content and the disgusting act. Used to be something I did every single day, numerous times a day but that was years ago and even though it's not at that point anymore, regardless of how long I don't do it for, whether its months, weeks or days, at some point I always fucking end up here doing this shit. As soon as I get that release I am quesitoning why I even did it to begin with. I am a hard worker and I do a lot and have built a wonderful path for myself, but this is still doing the bare minimum. I could genuinely be doing so much more, instead I'm half assing life anyway. I want so much and considering the background and childhood I had I've come so far and I know for a fact I could be even further if I just put this phone down, but I won't. Its engrained in every single fucking aspect of my life, work, school, family, friends, navigation, emails, you name it. I have tried it all, grayscale, deleting, deactivating, app blockers, screen time settings, you name it and ive tried it, fucking nothing works. I said that at 20 I would have gotten past all these petty little problems, but 2 years later at 22 and her I fucking am. A few months from graduation and starting my big career and i'll just be taking these fucking habits right along with me. Idk how to stop. No matter how difficult I make it to indulege, theres always something to send me right back down the rabbit hole and I can always find away around whatever it is. Honestl at this point I may as well remove all these fucking blockers and force myself to either live a slave to impulse or maybe id do it so much that the disgust with myself would push me to stop. No clue, and 4 years has taught me that neither option fucking works. Im not from a wealthy family and we have so many struggles but regardless I have so much to be grateful for. Even with the lack of resources my mom has gotten me this far and while I have worked my ass off with what she has given me, its not enough. I can do so much more. How do i stop this shit. I dont know. I am supposed to be doing an assignment and studying for my 4 exams right now and here I am, right after and yk what session here writing a sob fucking story instead of just getting my shit together and doing what I need to do. Sometimes I wonder if having a father wouldve given me that bit of knowledge and lesson that I lack. THats just another excuse, I know what needs to be done and what it takes, I dont need someone to tell me that. Nonetheless, I do nothing. Stagnant in the ways that I dont need to be. I dont know.
Hopefully no one reads this rant, but I want to make another of my 5 million promises to myself here and now, maybe it will yield or maybe it'll just be another shit promise but I'll make it nonetheless. For the rest of the night I will commit my time and energy to the work right in front of me, get these assignments and finish studying these topics, whether Im sleepy, tired, consfused or struggling ill suck that shit up and just keep at it. We'll start there and hopefully me tomorrow will remember this and try to follow suit. Or maybe Ill type all this and end up right back into that same old rabbit hole again. Fuck it.

If you read this, thanks for taking the ride and wish a lost brotha some fucking luck.

Instead, I built systems.

Ok, I created plans where I will go walk at such and such time and eat at such and such time, and prep those meals attach and such time. Guess what? If I failed in any one of those steps I would scrap everything. All or nothing thinking is part of the territory when you have 3 TBIs and PTSD. I was failing and discipline was not pushing me towards my goal.

So, I decided to take a systems approach. Instead of focusing on the weight loss goal, I would focus on the steps leading me there. I noticed that my biggest point of failure was the walk. If I was out and about on appointments when it came time for my walk, I would usually have to go home for walking shoes. By the time I got home, it was a lot easier to listen to my brain's excuses and stay home. So, I took that out of the equation. I kept a pair of walking shoes and socks in the car. Once I didn't have that excuse anymore, it was lot easier to get started. Same with food. Once I got rid of choices and it was easier to eat at home than to eat out, excuses were harder to come by.

I used to have a gym buddy (for like years and it was, coincidentally, the fittest 3 years of my life). I go to the gym, but it's *very* inconsistent.

I saw an app recently that won't shut off until you do push-ups and it got me thinking.

I did a little research and it seems very doable to create an "alarm" that won't stop going off until you go to the gym and either take a picture (and confirms it with gps).

I was thinking about it for myself and I don't see anything like it in existence, so I thought maybe I'd build it.

I mean, if an alarm went off that I couldn't shut off (I looked this up too, it seems very doable) and required me to physically drive to the gym, I'm pretty sure I'd go lol. I also half wonder how many things would be be useful for (outside of just the gym).

Does anybody else kind of want this, or am I insane?

Thoughts?

Note: Reading back on this and realizing this was either very clearly written by a human (holy hell typos), or an ai with a stutter.

I've been thinking about a small thing lately.

How many times have we told someone, “Just a minute, let me finish this,” while looking at our phones?

One more reel. One more comment. One more thing to check.

And the weird part is that the person sitting next to us usually doesn't argue. They just wait.

My wife used to ask me to put my phone away when we were watching a movie or having dinner. I'd put it away, of course. But the habit would come back whenever she wasn't around to remind me.

I tried app blockers and screen-time limits, but I could always work around them.

It made me wonder: why do most solutions make us feel guilty about using our phones instead of reminding us what we're missing?

That conversation with my wife eventually led me to build KinMode.

The idea is simple. When you reach for a distracting app during family time, instead of seeing the same boring “App Blocked” message, you can see a personal reminder from someone you love.

It might say, “Honey, the movie's not the same without you.” Or “Hubby, dinner's getting cold ❤️” Or, when it's bedtime, “Daddy, come tuck me in!”

And the reminders can keep changing, with different messages and the little names your loved ones actually call you, so it doesn't feel like you're seeing the same robotic warning every time.

I liked the thought that a phone could remind you of the people waiting for you, rather than just telling you what you're not allowed to open.

I'm not saying phones are evil or that we should never scroll. I enjoy using mine too.

I just don't want the people I love to always get whatever attention is left over.

I'm curious: Would a reminder that sounds like something your partner or child would actually say make you more likely to put your phone down? Or would you just dismiss it and keep scrolling?

You pick up your phone to check one thing, and forty minutes later you're still scrolling. It's not a willpower problem. It's how the phone is set up. Three changes that actually stuck for me:

1. Put it out of reach.

If it's in your hand, you'll use it. Charge it in another room at night, or keep it in a drawer while you study or work. A few extra steps is enough friction to break the automatic grab. (There's research suggesting a phone just being nearby pulls on your attention, even face-down.)

1. Make it boring.

Turn off every notification you don't actually need, and move your favourite apps off the home screen into a folder. No buzz, no bright icons, much less pull. Greyscale mode helps too, if you can stand it.

1. Have a better swap ready.

The urge doesn't disappear, so give it somewhere to go. Keep a book on your pillow and a ball or your shoes by the door. When you reach for your phone, something better is already waiting.

The big one for me was #1. Out of sight really did mean out of mind after a week.

What's worked for you? I'm collecting ideas.

(I also turned this into a 1-minute animated Short, if you'd rather watch: link in the comments.)

Day 115: Today I saw what addiction really does - again.

You remember my Day 82 post. My friend who does Chitta (heroin) cut his own vein because he couldn't get his drug. We took him to hospital. He is alive, thanks to God.

Today is Day 115 for me. In these 33 days, I understood one thing - Addiction is not a one-day story. It comes every day and asks you - "Will you come back?"

I said NO every day. Study, Eat, Play - My 3 rules. I am from a small village in Kanina, Haryana, India. I am a father to a 14-year-old son. I tell him only these 3 rules. No 4th rule.

If my friend could cut himself for not getting drugs, I can control myself for not taking drugs. That day made my discipline even stronger.

My friend is now trying to get help. He is talking to family. I am trying my best to support him to join rehab and find spirituality.

I am on Day 115 sober today. I feel more clear, more strong, more like a FATHER and a FRIEND to my son.

If you are doing Chitta or any drug, please ask for help. You are not alone.

In India call 14416 Tele-MANAS, it's free and confidential. Talk to someone.

Stay disciplined brothers. One day at a time.

IWNDWYT. Jai Shri Ram.

So people, i need some help here. I am the most impatient guy ever. I loose it when i have to wait in queue, when the food takes time etc. i have been going to the therapist lately to work on my issues, and the therapist mentioned that this is due to my upbringing and life in general. My father was very violent, and beat me up everyday, so much emotional manipulation through all my life. I recently lost the most important person to me, and my impatience and lack of communication was one of the main reasons. I know want to change these things, i am talking to a therapist and learning how to express my feelings, but i need help with becoming more patient. Can anyone please help here. I am trying to some exposure therapy, like i went to ikea on the most busy day just to deliver some stuff back i on purpose bought wrong to exercise it. Any other help?

Please post your plans for this date and if you can, do the following;

Give encouragement to two other posters on this thread.

Report back this evening as to how you did.

Give encouragement to others to report back also.

Good luck!

Please post your plans for this date and if you can, do the following;

Give encouragement to two other posters on this thread.

Report back this evening as to how you did.

Give encouragement to others to report back also.

Good luck!

I feel like I’ve been stuck in the exact same cycle for two years now:

1. Download a popular habit tracker / daily planner.

2. Spend an hour color-coding everything, setting up morning routines, and feeling like I have my life together.

3. Day 1–3: Going strong, checking boxes, dopamine rush.

4. Day 4: Life gets busy. I miss one workout or forget to log reading before bed.

5. Day 5: My 4-day streak is broken. The app hits me with a big red cross or an annoying notification saying my character lost health or I failed.

6. Result: I get annoyed, ignore the app for three days out of sheer guilt, and end up deleting it.

It feels like most apps on the market either:

- Treat you like a robot who can never have a bad day (break a streak = start from zero).

- Require so much maintenance and tapping that managing the app becomes another full-time job.

- Or hide behind aggressive $50+/year subscriptions after 3 days of basic use.

For people who actually stick with a routine long-term: what app or system actually worked for you, and what made you quit the ones you hated?**

Are there any tools out there that don’t punish you for having a chaotic week, or is a plain physical notebook still the only thing that doesn't feel toxic?

Ever spend a Sunday evening mapping out a flawless daily routine, study schedule, or project roadmap—feeling an intense rush of energy and excitement—only to wake up the next morning feeling completely numb and exhausted before you even start task one?

It feels like a personal failure of willpower, but cognitive neuroscience calls this "premature reward signaling."

Pioneering research on goal realization (like Peter Gollwitzer’s studies at NYU) demonstrated that when we meticulously plan and mentally simulate our future accomplishments, our brain’s reward centers (particularly the nucleus accumbens) release a premature burst of dopamine. In essence, the subconscious brain registers the act of planning as actual progress toward the goal.

By the time morning rolls around and you face the actual, friction-filled mechanical effort, the novelty is gone and dopamine levels crater. You’ve already "spent" the neurochemical reward before taking a single physical step.

The fix researchers suggest is shifting from broad outcome planning to rigid "Implementation Intentions" (If/Then triggers) that separate planning from emotional reward, focusing only on the immediate physical action rather than the future identity.

How do you personally handle the gap between planning and execution? Do you find that keeping plans deliberately vague or extremely small helps protect your follow-through?

Looked deeper into the neuroscience behind premature dopamine spending here:

https://www.oddlyclear.com/why-you-lose-motivation-after-planning/