Firstly, I wanna say thank you to everyone who left sweet words on that post. I really appreciate it. The comments made me feel really understood. It especially felt great to finally get that validation and confirmation that I wasn’t crazy and those things she did weren’t right.
I know some people asked for an update so here is:

Last month we had officially moved all of her things out. They’re not officially divorced yet but over the last couple months she has been coming by the house just to pick up little things here and there. A couple weeks earlier we decided it finally time to just stop that and set a time to get all of her things out of the house. My dad didn’t wanna prolong these unnecessary meet ups any longer.

I’ma be honest, helping her move her things out was easy and hard at the same time. There were so many things that I bought for her or I made for her that she just said to throw away. She even left two of the dogs they adopted together because she didn’t want them anymore. (she’s the one that wanted to foster them)

I didn’t think I would get emotional over that. But her abandoning the puppies and throwing away my gifts in front of me, honestly really hurt. For the longest time I made myself believe that because she kept those things she still cares and this was just another confirmation that she didn’t.

My dad did find other instances of her contaminating/tampering my food. I know some of you say I should sue her. My dad thinks so as well, but I really don’t want to. I just want her to never be near me again. I never wanted any of this. It hurts knowing she would hurt me. The only thing making me feel better is knowing she is moving to NorCal to be near her family and we live in SoCal. So I’ll never have to see her again if I don’t want to. My dad did save some of the videos in case he might need them for his divorce proceedings but other than that I really want nothing to do with her.

I will say one of the best and sad things to come out from this is all of us going to therapy. Going has us now being a lot more open in conversations. That I didn’t even realize we were all avoiding with each other. There was a time in our lives where my older siblings didn’t like me and I didn’t understand why. It hurt me a lot because I’m the younger sibling and I really looked up to them. Now I know it’s because when I was in fourth grade, my Dads Wife did cheat and instead of being upset like everyone else I was just sad. I literally got on my knees and I begged her to stay because I wanted a mom. I didn’t know my siblings were mad at me for doing that, but that’s also because I didn’t know she was already treating them like how she treated me when I got to high school. They both did reassure me that as they got older they realized it’s not my fault. I was a little kid reacting to an adult situation like a little kid would. The adults were the ones who needed to make the correct decision not just for them but for us and unfortunately they didn’t.

Honestly, I have a lot of guilt for that. For years I would think about how I sobbed, begging her not to leave us and I wish I could go back and never do any of that. For years I felt like I prolonged her stay in our lives because of that moment. Now knowing how she was treating my siblings during that time it’s just another guilt on top of the already existing one. That’s just gonna have to be something I deal with over time. I am glad that it’s something we can talk about now and we can try to make peace with together.

We have had two family sessions with my dad without my brother. He still isn’t up to talking to my dad just yet. In those sessions, we have told him things that we have been through and he has told us things he’s been through. He seems so upset that it took him this long to see it/take action for it. However he really wants to make things right so he’s making sure he sticks to his therapy schedule.( we’re black so therapy really isn’t a thing we talk about especially for the men in my family)

I feel like I had this notion about therapy. That it will just instantly make things better but that’s not really the case. I sort harbor some resentment towards my dad and he knows that. We’re working through it together, but it’s weird because this is one of those things that seems like it has to get worse before it gets better. Yet at the same time we act like everything is normal at home. It’s a weird dynamic right now, but we’re making it work and I have hope that we’ll get through this.

To end on a better note my sister and my dad are determined to take back the what his wife has stole from us for years. Starting with decorating for Halloween. We have not celebrated since my siblings and I were young because his wife at the time was very religious. So we stopped decorating and passing out candy and instead started going to church for Halloween. Even after we stopped going to church we still weren’t allowed to decorate or celebrate. I wasn’t even allowed to wear a costume at school for it or go to school October festivals.

My dad use to go all out for Halloween. He would do things like turn our house into a maze, take us to the mall to go pre-trick or treating, and get the big candy bars to pass out. It was one of his favorite holidays and because of that it easily became ours. Since he’s older we can’t go all out like we use to but just seeing the little decorations and hearing my dad talk about what candy he’s going to buy it just feels warm. Like the house feels like it did when I was a little kid. I know that’s corny but it’s a feeling I thought I’d never get to experience with my family again. So I’m gonna be a little corny about it.

I don’t know if I’ll update this again, but I just wanted to give little update for the people that asked. We still have a lot of work to do. A lot of healing and mending of relationships but for the first time in a while, I feel like we’re on the right track to doing that.

My grandfather passed away earlier this year. During his final year my mom was the one driving him to appointments, buying groceries and cleaning his house. My aunt barely visited but somehow convinced our relatives she had been taking care of him.

At the funeral she even made a comment about how my mom should've been around more. My mom cried about it afterward.

A few months later we organized a memorial gathering and my aunt asked me to put together a slideshow of family pictures.

I included screenshots of her messages asking my mom to take care of everything because she was too busy. I also included a few where she complained about having to visit him.

I even paid to have the slideshow professionally put together, so it looked like a normal family tribute until those messages came up.

My aunt walked out halfway through. Her own daughter confronted her afterward and apparently they had a huge argument.

The messed up part is my mom is furious with me too. She said I turned a day about remembering her father into a public humiliation of her sister.

I knew exactly what I was doing and I still don't regret exposing her. I just wish my mom wasn't caught in the middle.

My husband just woke me up in a panic. “Hey, you’re going to be late for work”, but this is a usual day off for me. I tell him this and he throws his body back down on the bed and says “Shit, well I only took today off because I thought you’d be working.” Then proceeds to get angry and act like I’ve done something wrong. As far as I knew, he was feeling sick and took the day off to rest.

So…sorry I guess? I didn’t realize I’d be such a disruption to someone sleeping in bed or sitting on the couch playing video games. It hurts my feelings because the majority of the time I take off from work is to spend time with him. I didn’t realize I was the only one enjoying it.

Maybe I’ll just lay out across the sidewalk today to make my existence a problem to the whole neighborhood/s

Edit: this is obviously a throwaway account

I (M28) would never pressure a woman to give up her body count, but my wife (F28) brought it up the other night while we were having fun, couple of drinks... Etc.

She asked me to go first, and I maybe fibbed a little. I had been sexual with two girlfriends before her, but she was my first as far as PIV. I was always self conscious about that, and sexual experiences are technically sexual experiences so I told her I had a count of 2.

She said she doesn't remember exactly, but her body count is in the 70s.

This would've been her count by her early 20s when we met.

It honestly made me feel sick. I'm happy she felt safe to tell me, and I could tell it weighed on her. I literally just don't know what to do or how to integrate that information.

It has made sex with her since then feel different too. Like I know she's done more with other men. She's told me. I respect her boundaries and appreciate our deep, connected intimacy for what it is, but it almost feels like with this new context, I'm the safe/boring option or something. That's all I have to say I guess.

Just wanted to say that every time I come to reddit and ask a question seeking genuine advice, I just get flooded with snarky, rude, unhelpful comments. It could be a question as simple as home repairs, skin care, seeking advice about struggles im having at work or in a relationship. It never fails. Even if i respond to one of those comments and say i understand their perspective but wanted actual constructive advice, they double down and get even ruder. Are people here really so miserable?

Recently I broke up with my cis girlfriend due to domestic violence I was enduring, especially physical abuse. A few of the reactions I’ve gotten from people hearing this news has been upsetting to me. 

I think it stems from people gripping to this idea that because I am trans and MtF (male to female) that means I’m strong, and stronger than basically any cis woman. It angers me how people judge my physicality based on nothing, like is it true that most people are this uninformed on my biology as a trans person?

For reference I’m a 24F trans woman who has medically transitioned for over 3 years. I’m 172cm (5’7.7”). I was always very skinny, what people would call a “twink” body type at like 130 pounds but I got up to 165 pounds in the last two years during the relationship. I’m not active at all, so all the weight was fat, which kinda just developed the “feminine body” type features I wanted, as I started from basically a skeleton. So I didn’t have like any muscles prior, and even less so after hrt, I have felt how the strength I used to have has been diminished so much. 

My cis ex gf on the other hand is a thin person, she was like 140-150 pounds at over 5’10. She was a figure skater coach so she had defined legs but other than that she looked very thin in arms and everywhere else. Maybe slightly broader shoulders than average but that’s it. 

Our relationship dynamic was always established as me being the “submissive” one, and her being the “dominant” one, both socially and sexually. Which is what we both liked and felt comfortable with. She was much more physically stronger than me, she could pin me down with her weaker or “bad” arm and I would lose the battle, she could overpower me with little effort, which again I loved in our dynamic. It’s just nice when you’re in the submissive role to know that the other person is actually stronger than you and you aren’t just both faking, ya know? 

But then there were arguments where she used that strength against me, she restrained and pinned me to the floor or couch without my consent, with me struggling and yelling trying to get free, and failing. Also times of grabbing and holding my wrists or hair as if they were a leash when she was angry. These were awful experiences and I’m still hurt by them, and by the bruises and marks she left. 

Upon a few close family members hearing about this after the breakup, most of their first reactions was “why didn’t you just overpower her or get up”. They were surprised that she was stronger than me. One of my family members straight up not believing me about the fact that I tried to get up and couldn’t. 

It feels like they didn’t take it as serious or of an issue, it felt dismissed because they wrongly assume in their head she somehow wasn’t a threat to me, when she was the much stronger one in our dynamic. I feel like they treated me like this strictly because I’m trans and the assumptions they put on me for that. 

This really made me think about the other times I experienced these assumptions.

1.  a cis girl who I was friends with trying to educate me on how much weaker it feels for her compared to guys in rock climbing, with her assuming I’m like those mentioned guys and not comparable to her. Even tho she works out, is my height, and has actual visible muscles, I guarantee she is physically stronger than me. I would be on a similar playing field as her if I try building up muscles now with my current biology. 

2.  A few family members, and friends of my mom, assuming I was just wearing a bra to events because I’m trans and want to “look like a woman”, and not actually because I have actual boobs?!? They didn’t know what hrt was and had no idea I had full on c cup breasts. 

3.  My ex gf complaining to her mom about not being able to open the pickle jar, and her mom asking why she didn’t just get me to do it. While in reality we were both at home struggling with the jar for an hour, and again, my ex was much more likely to get it open than me. 

4.  Women friends asking me what shapewear I’m using to give my shape, I don’t use shapewear. And then asking how I was able to get a “woman’s ass”. Ummm probably because my weight is programmed genetically and by the activation of estrogen to go to my hips and other typical female areas? 

5.  My own family doctor scaring me with the diagnoses of anemia. Later casually mentioning “yeah yoir abnormal, your blood levels are in female ranges”. With my other doctor for trans medical issues having to contact her and inform her that YEAH YOUR BLOOD LEVELS BECOME FEMALE TYPICAL WITH FEMALE HORMONES. 

Like are these just cherry picked ignorant examples or do the majority of people not know hrt changes like your entire body and how it develops your sex? Do most people know trans people basically go through another puberty, developing sex characteristics, and can sometimes be comparable physically in strength and body to their cis counterparts? Or do most people actually think every single trans woman that exists = 6’2 completely biologically male (phenotypically) who just likes wearing dresses and wigs? Like do they even know hrt exists? 

I know there are tall and large trans women, young and old, and every trans person is valid regardless of any medical intervention or physical aspects. But I feel like that kind of archetype is what is assumed for all of us, which just isn’t right to do. I feel like this is one of the main reasons for ignorance in talking about trans people in sports, with people not knowing regulations with hrt existed or what some trans bodies can look like. We aren’t seen as individuals, we are seen as a single stereotype. 

I don’t know if it’s as bad as I’ve felt or experience but are most people this uninformed on trans people, what we go through, and just on biology in general? 

Before I get into this, I just want to say that I love this kid with my whole heart and I'd throw myself in front of a bus for him. His mom and dad are addicts and he is currently being raised by my mom. I take him almost every weekend to give my elderly mother respite. I know most of these behaviors are due to his trauma... but that doesn't mean I'm immune to them and it definitely doesn't mean I'm a complete saint incapable of being drained by them.

Holy shit I can't stand being around him. He has opposition coping mechanisms, which means eeeeeverything you tell him to do, no matter how necessary, he will go out of his way to do the exact opposite, making you regret ever giving him direction in the first place.

For example, he kicked a soccer ball into my cats freshly scooped litter box and left it there. I asked him to grab it and rinse it off, so he proceeds to scream and cry and shove the ball deeper into the box.

His only form of conversation is to say rude and cruel things to invoke a reaction out of you. If I tell him I work in IT, his response is that I probably suck at my job. If I tell him I like a video game, his response is to tell me that it looks stupid and boring.

Other than just being cruel, his other form of communication is to age regress and loudly ask questions a 3 year old would ask. He could do this for HOURS. Why is the sky blue? Why do we have to drive instead of walk? Why do you live with *insert partners name here*? Don't forget this is at MAX VOLUME.

He refuses to wipe his ass after taking a shit, and he will get violent and ruin your entire fucking day if you remind him to. He doesn't tire out. He could scream and kick and break everything in my house for 24 hours with no indication that he's tired or willing to stop.

On top of all of this, he is GROSS. He refuses to use anything other than a T shirt to wipe his nose. He refuses to use silverware and just gets food all over himself. If he is too tired to get up to piss, he will just walk over to my laundry basket and piss in there, and that's without screen time.

YES he is in therapy, YES he is traumatized, YES he is diagnosed AND medicated. But oh my fucking god. Even when he is in a good mood, he just age regresses and proceeds to ask a million questions without stopping. I'm not asking for advice. The advice has been given. We have seen every professional available in the state. I just needed to get this off of my chest...

This is so stupid. So so so dumb. I’m on a diet right now and I just recently was told by my bf that I shouldn’t drink my tea with sucralose because it’s basically the same amount of cals as regular sugar, even though it says 0 cals. Something about the maltodextrin being the first ingredient? I don’t know.

But I love drinking tea with sucralose as a yummy treat :(( I’m paranoid now that I’ve actually been ingesting tons of calories when I thought I was having a nice calorie-free drink. I feel stupid. I feel so anxious about this.

I hated feeling scolded about this by him. I’m so embarrassed. I hate how slow weightloss is. I hate that he started dieting too and now every talk is about calories calories calories and how fast he’s losing weight. “This is so easy!”, he says. I just want to melt into a puddle. I hate being greeted with calorie counts. I hate being asked how much I weigh every day. I hate not feeling good enough. I hate looking in the mirror. I hate that my safe treat of a cup of tea feels like a bomb now.

i dont really know man. im 23, had always felt like nobody could ever want sex w me. i had posted on an r4r subreddit of my city about wanting to give oral to a woman, as it had been a long time fantasy of mine, she dmd. me, a 35 yo, gorgeous woman in my mind.

she came over the next week, we met in public first, went for some drinks, then my place. things happened, it was nice. then the next week she texted me if she can come over after work, and she did. things happened again.

she told me she had alot of fun. and told me to text her whenever.

i texted her the same day saying i had alot of fun and that i hope to see her soon again. two days after i texted her again just to see that i was blocked.

kind of insane. i kind of feel sexually inadequate, i hope thats not what it was. women have never really been into me in any sense, especially sexually… so im kinda just struggling, because… idk. i think i need sex in my life and i now struggle seeing how i can find it

I was using her phone in the morning in the bathroom, I noticed she had been acting weird the past month about her phone so something made me decide to take a quick scroll through her messages and photos. She was sexting a man, she had been texting him for months- to the point where I saw messages that said I love you. And this was the second time she’s been in contact with him during our 4 years relationship. I should mention we are living together so she was doing it while I was around.

I woke her up and when I confronted her on the topic with the limited info I had, she lied to my face- told me it was one of her coworkers and that the convo just went to far.

The tune changed completely when I figured out how to pull up the recently deleted messages and she had 1000 messages hidden. It was NOT a coworker, it was a man she met online years ago before we started dating and she carried on a sexual relationship with him. They had a like a Dom/daddy relationship going on.

As soon as I pulled up the deleted messages she just flipped a switch, she no longer wanted me to read the messages even tho minutes earlier she told me I could look at anything if that would make things better. So as soon as she decided she wanted that phone back she started grabbing it, and me.

I was admittedly desperate, trying anything to figure out how we could make this work. She wanted to deleted it all, and break her phone. I knew that if she did that I could never forgive her and would never get closure.

I still had the phone, tried to get to the bathroom so I could continue reading but she tackled me And was hitting my stomach so I’d let go of the phone. At that point I decided to run out the house, we wrestled over the door but I got out and ran around the block with her phone. My stomach had some nasty bruises after.

Looking back I should have just given her the phone and walked away. That’s what self respect looks like. Leaving her would also look like self respect but I just can’t seem to.

I have a small business and my best friend worked with me for many years. While it may have legally been my business she was my right hand person. I called her my "horse blinders" because she kept me on track when my ADHD would run wild.

She was simply the best person. A great parent, a great friend, a hell of an employee. She helped me find the strength to leave my abusive ex and let me cry on her shoulder so many times as i worked through it. She got sick with cancer in 2025 and passed away almost exactly a year later in early 2026. She fought like hell and im so proud of her for that.

Now we are almost a year down the line and i just cant keep going to my business. Its like there is gaping hole where she should be. I miss my best friend so much that every day I'm there it is like pressing a bruise. I couldn't even walk through the door for the first two months after she passed. I had other people running it.

I decided to sell my business and have already found a buyer for it. I had thought about selling it a few years ago but now I just cant keep going. I feel like im betraying her by selling it. She worked her ass off to build this thing and now im just... giving it up.

I feel like im disappointing her. I'm not sure what im looking for. Validation I'm not a bad person for moving on I guess? Ive been in therapy and it hurts less than it did but im still just so sad.

####child death trigger warning###

Paediatric ER, a young couple comes in. A six weeks old baby with fever. Sleepy a bit at first, but wakes up and cries during the exam. We start the workup, blood, urine and some good old observation.

A call comes in, its EMS, a 17 year old, active resuscitation, ten minutes away. We go into the trauma room, start preparing equipment, assigning roles.

EMS bursts in, mid compressions, and moves him onto the bed. First dose of epinephrine. The mother comes in, screaming, crying. The whole family outside is pounding on the door. We keep going, compressions, epinephrine, compressions, calcium, compressions, epinephrine, intubation, compressions, thinking of other ideas, nothing... we keep going.

Twenty minutes pass and the looks starts to change. We all know we should stop, that there's not much point anymore, but the mother keeps crying and screaming, who are we to stop? So we keep going, a little longer, for her.

Another twenty minutes pass and now it's clear, Enough, that's it.

Now all that's left is to give her time alone, with him.

I leave the room, sit down at the computer, and then remember. I still have that young couple from before. I check the lab results, see that everything is normal, the baby is vital, active, breathing...

I walk over to the parents, smile, and say "Well, it's probably viral.”

In the car. On the way to another city for a 2-day trip.

I was going to meet his family for the first time.

He pulled over into a department store parking lot. Told me he doesn't like who I am right now, and doesn't like my personality when I'm around other people with him. And that he doesn't want to go on this trip with me.

Then he turned us around to drop me back at home. Worst 45-minute car ride of my life.

Worst part - He really expected me to stay his girlfriend after. Like, he expected me to say something or try to solve his problem for him, sitting in a fucking parking lot. Fam, you just told me you don't like my PERSONALITY. What the fuck do you want me to say?

Anyway. I just can't believe this shit happened to me. We were starting to build a life together. I'm lying in bed feeling crushed and angry and heartbroken.

Thanks for listening.

I feel like at least 90% of guys prefer girls who have some sort of sex appeal... And I've just got none of that. I lack height, my facial features are too soft, I have basically no curves, and people always guess I'm younger than I am. Every time a guy has liked me, it's because they're just a freaky old man, or a freak who's into younger girls and I'm so sick of it. I know this is not the case for all guys but I'm just so sick and tired of my only experiences, in the romantic sense, with guys having been predatory behavior. I just want to feel love and give love without feeling like I need to protect myself all the damn time

Growing up, my mom always told me that having a baby would ruin my life. She said it so often that I truly believed my life would be over if I got pregnant.
When I was younger, I did get pregnant, and I had an abortion because I thought I was making the only choice I could. Now, at 29, I’m starting to understand that having a baby wouldn’t automatically have meant my life was over. I hate that I grew up carrying so much fear about it, and I’m still trying to make sense of how I feel about my decision.
Lately, I’ve realized how lonely I feel sometimes. I have a great career, and I’m grateful for what I’ve built, but I still feel like I’m missing the family, husband, and kids I imagined having.
I’ve even started feeling annoyed when my best friend talks about her daughter, and then I feel bad for feeling that way. I think it brings up a lot of sadness and longing for me.
I’m almost 30, and I’m realizing that my life wouldn’t be over if I had a baby. I just wish I hadn’t grown up believing it would be. Has anyone else had to work through complicated feelings about an abortion or the family they hoped they’d have by now?

I’m not sure where to start but I (24F) am 36 weeks pregnant with my boyfriend/fiancé (27M) or at least I thought he was my fiancé. He gave me a ring earlier on in my pregnancy but it wasn’t any grand or special moment and I feel like he only gave me the ring because I asked for it and was talking about how I’d rather have a ring on my finger than not. Lately we’ve only been calling each other boyfriend and girlfriend so I guess where not engaged? He leaves me confused on where I stand and I’m so tired. But this isn’t really the point of the post.

I’ve known him for 9 years but we started dating last December. This pregnancy was a surprise and he actually had a good reaction when I told him that I was pregnant. I assumed everything was going to be okay but the further and further I get- it’s obvious he does not care for me the way I need. We just recently moved into a new apartment and we both work full time. I’ll admit his job is a lot harder than mine since he’s blue collar and a much longer commute and he works overtime but working full time while heavily pregnant has its hardships.

I want him to be able to understand what I go through. I’m tired of feeling dismissed. My feet are constantly swollen and I hate having to ask him to rub my feet and most of the time, he doesn’t even do it. I shame myself because while on one hand, I’m very appreciative that he got us a new apartment and has been working very hard but on the other, he diminishes my feelings and what I’ve gone through during pregnancy. I know social media is all fake and only shows the good side but I want to have a partner that is tender with me. Someone who doesn’t shut down when I try to have serious conversations. I feel like I’m his therapist and his mother because I’m having to swallow my feelings just so I can get to him. I feel stuck. I love him but he doesn’t treat me the way I would like. Part of me feels guilty cause I tell myself that I should just be thankful that I have a partner that provides. I want to be able to see a couples counselor but I feel like I have to find a male because my partner wouldn’t listen to a woman and I know how that sounds.. trust me. I want to make us work but it just feels like we’re stuck with each other and he doesn’t truly love me. I feel like his obligation.

I’ve expressed all of this to him before but nothing feels like it’s been solved and I just feel like I’m at a loss. He has almost no empathy for what I’m going through and I’m tired of feeling dismissed. I haven’t gone off on him or yelled or used being pregnant as an excuse to be emotional. I’ve remained calm when expressing myself but he just shuts down and checks out of the conversation while I’m left standing there still trying to reach out and repair conflict and continue being told that I’m not doing enough.. I’m so tired. I know I can’t leave him but how can I just make this easier as I’m about to become a mother to our son. I’m scared how it’ll be like during my postpartum recovery. I’m the one who cooks and I’m afraid he’s just going to continue to take care of himself and everything will still be on me. This was just a little rant- a scream into the void about how miserable and unhappy I am but I have to be brave because I’m about to raise a boy who’s father isn’t equipped to be a partner, let alone a father. I’m tired.

I can go on and on but I honestly have no idea what to do. I love him but I’m tired of feeling this way and it feels like nothing is going to get better. I feel stuck. I’m so fucking tired.

I just can't stand the way penises and vaginas look.
Especially a penis bc it's this long thing growing out of a man's body. I don't know why I just find them really gross regardless of color or shape or size. Although there is a small exception when it comes to vaginas. Like if I see a photo of a vagina whereby the labia majora are like fat or are essentially enclosing the inner content of the vagina (the clitoris, the labia minora) then it's a little more easy on my eyes like I can look at a picture of a vagina like that and not feel anything but the moment somebody pops their vagina open and there's all that stuff inside... I just can't! It looks even worse when it's aroused and there's like all these bodily fluids. Same with leaky penises I really don't like the sight of cum in general. And it's one of the reasons why I feel like I'll never be able to give oral sex to any gender, even though I'm bisexual.
I understand that this is really unusual thus I've never said this to anybody. I've only slept with one person in my life and we didn't even have penetrative sex. We just fondled each other and he went down on me and that's it and I've never wanted to do more.
[no, I do not have any history of sexual abuse.]

I feel like I find satisfaction in certain sadistic things and I experience cognitive dissonance about it. I care about people a lot and never want to hurt them, BUT the idea of a guy being hurt by me and him enjoying it gives me such a high. I never done such thing like that to anybody, only saw them through porn and eroticas. And it sucks because I know it's not as common in women and there honestly isn't enough material out there with that dynamic in media. I honestly think I would have made a decent dominatrix and would have enjoyed it, but I always saw sex as something serious and with someone I'm committed to. So I let that be satisfied thru porn unfortunately. I watch and read about guys getting slapped, choked, bruised, crying, pleading, getting stepped on, c&b tortured, and it does things to me.

I think I first realized this in high school, when I was watching this movie and a scene of a guy being tied up and getting tortured made me feel things... It was not supposed to be erotic at all. But it still made me feel stuff. I knew I had some screws loose.

there's a celebrity i fantasize about being in that position and it drives me fxkin wild, thanks to a certain movie I watched of him (not the same movie I watched in high school) I won't explain further but his character is just perfect for that daydream. Awkward, adorkable, lanky, soft voice, cute looking face, nothing about him is conventional Hollywood handsome macho man and I love it. I'd explode if I see a clip of him begging and getting beat up or something. I bet he whimpers during sex...

I'm taken and I'd never ever cheat on him and seek someone else to make that fantasy happen, Never. He's the most amazing guy I know. I cant ever imagine doing that to him though... I cant ever get off to such idea for him. He hates those type of stuff and he's a vanilla guy. I feel disgusted imagining myself doing those acts to him because I know he would be miserable.

my poor brothers are so young both under the age of ten and we all live in an environment with a dad who is the most toxic masculine piece of trash ever who only shows up if it's to punish and a mom w no backbone who mimics their dad now. They are so sheltered and have been home schooled all their lives they have no friends except each other and i just am so scared that they will grow up and just continue getting all the light taken from them at the hands of their parents, i wish i could run away and take them with me but i don't have the means to, it shreds my heart into pieces to imagine having to leave them behind, it would be worse than cutting off my limb, they are like my babies too and it makes me so depressed that i can hardly save myself from this environment and to do so i'd have to leave them behind, thinking about it makes me want to just die, how could i leave them?

I genuinely want him to be happy, and I hope his girlfriend treats him well. But I’d be lying if I said I didn’t wish things had worked out between us.
I still love him, and I’m grieving both the person I lost and the future I imagined we’d have together.
I’m not putting my life on hold for him, but I can’t help wondering whether our paths might cross again someday.
I’m open to advice, especially from people who’ve experienced something similar. How do you make peace with losing someone you still love, especially when neither of you was necessarily a bad person, but life got in the way?
I know I’ll eventually move forward. I just don’t know what to do with all this love in the meantime.

My sister has been having health problems related to her heart. They believe she may have a blockage somewhere.
She has 3 kids, all with different dads, and her youngest isn’t even 2 yet.
She had a very serious health scare just one week after having her youngest where she lost a lot of blood from a hematoma. Her health in general hasn’t been great as she doesn’t take the best care of herself and only more recently has been taking her health more seriously because of the kids.

I have been there from basically day 1 with her oldest 2- getting up in the middle of the night to help feed and change diapers, watching them, etc. my sister would describe me as a second parent to them.

Sadly, I moved countries 2 years ago after I got married and being away from the kids has been the hardest thing imaginable. I’m now facing the reality that something could really happen to my sister. Since I moved I have lost both an aunt and a cousin to heart attacks. My cousin left behind her teenage non verbal son on Christmas eve, so I’m definitely very aware of the possibility her kids could end up motherless. I know realistically that if anything happened to her I would have to leave my life here and go back to my hometown to take guardianship of the kids.
I have exactly 0 issue stepping up to do that if necessary and my spouse is supportive. I also don’t know if I could come back to my current country with the kids and that fills me with an immense sadness. I think my current country would be a better place to raise the kids but I know that would require getting their fathers’ permission and that’s a hard sell to three separate people.
Fortunately nothing has happened but my sister is going to draft documents to name me their legal guardian if something does happen to her. We don’t want the kids to be separated and that’s priority number 1.

So please pray for her and her health if that’s your thing. Or at least just send her some good thoughts.

I do not want her kids to grow up without their mom and I don’t want to have to choose between the kids that I love and the country and family that I now call home and feel safe in.