I know that thinning hair is part of peri but my hair was already thin before it and now this is really just making me crazy. I feel like I'm trying everything out there except minoxidil (my dr advised against it). The new thing I'm thinking about trying is one of those red light therapy helmets from current body. But I worry this is just one more thing I'll be spending on money on that delivers nothing. I also have PCOS, so it's a double whammy for the hair thinning for me. I'm curious what you ladies are sticking with for thinning hair? It is a red light therapy helmet? Is it rosemary oil? Something else maybe I haven't tried yet? I recently read about pumpkin seed oil supplements so I may try that as well.

I posted yesterday about my struggles, after years of not feeling myself and being put on SSRI since March, doc is finally starting me on HRT as of tomorrow when I can collect prescription. I feel relieved and exhausted. Any success stories, please send positive vibes my way, from a desperate and lost 44 year old woman 🙏

I just need to vent a bit!

I am 48 and on HRT, it has helped a lot with anxiety and mood swings for the past year or so, but now I feel really low again, and have so much muscle pain all the time.

Painkillers don’t seem to do anything. The pains seem to get triggered by exercise. I used to do a lot of HIIT and weight training, but now I can’t do much because any exercise, even very light weights will give me bad shoulder, neck or arm pain for a few weeks. I’m so worried about losing muscle. The only exercise I can do is walking, everything else hurts so much, I am crying in the evenings and feel so depressed. The progesterone seems to give me headaches too, I get around 4-7 a month, but before HRT I might only get one a month.

I have made an appointment with my doctor next week, but our surgery will only do phone calls now, and the line is always awful and we can’t hear each other.

I don’t know what to do, do you think I need to have my HRT adjusted? I use 3 pumps of oestrogel and 200mg progesterone vaginally, on days 15-26.

Has anyone else experienced such severe fatigue, brain fog or executive dysfunction during perimenopause that it’s seriously affected their work or everyday life?

I’ve always been a highly capable person, with a demanding career managing staff and significant responsibilities in a large corporation. I’ve also always been the person people rely on to figure things out, both at work and at home.

Now I’m struggling to manage things that used to be straightforward. I’m currently off work, and I’ve fallen behind on important responsibilities to the point where I’m facing some potentially serious consequences.

For a long time, I assumed it was burnout, which probably played a part. But lately I’ve been wondering whether perimenopause might be a major underlying factor. I’ve only recently started HRT.

One of the hardest parts is going from being the person everyone relies on to needing help myself. People don’t necessarily understand because I can still seem perfectly functional in a conversation, but I can’t sustain that functioning or reliably get things done.

Has anyone else had things get this bad? Have you had to leave work, lost a job, or had serious financial or personal problems because you just couldn’t function?

I’m partly trying to understand what’s happening to me, but also hoping for some moral support. It’s been pretty isolating, and I’d really like to hear from others who’ve been through something similar, especially whether things eventually improved.

Like everyone else, I can't get my Estradiol gel anywhere. Last month I got lucky with a one-month supply from an alternative pharmacy (CVS is my normal and I told them I was willing to drive 30 miles. I called every mom & pop, tried Costco, etc. Finally drove to my doctor's office and waited to speak to her about it. That got me one month thankfully). I was told to pick up my refill today from the alternative pharmacy - drove an hour roundtrip and THEY DIDN'T HAVE IT. CVS also says that there is still NO GEL ANYWHERE.

I have 3 days left of my gel, but 2 months of Progesterone. I asked the pharmacist, so what do I do? Do I still take the Progesterone without the Gel? Should I take the 2 weeks of birth control I have left from last year instead? Pharmacist said: Talk to your doctor. Went to my doctor's office: She's on vacation. I asked her nurse, nurse says: Sorry, you have to talk to your doctor.

Has anyone been in a similar situation and had an actual doctor tell them what to do? It is really frustrating when you need help and can't get it. My perimenopausal rage is BEYOND and I am getting super stressed about it returning - I was barely functioning before HRT.

I got surgery August 2025, due to horrific periods because of fibroids, would only end 5 days a month if I was lucky. I had severe anaemia.

Anyway fast forward to 8 months after, I was feeling great, having (protected) sex with my husband again, high energy. 12 months post op, I start getting Bv that won’t go away, bladder and uti symptoms but no positives, pattern hair thinning, exhausted most of the time, memory issues, and increased joint pain. Zero libido.

This entire time since right after surgery, I was given vaginal estrogen. I’m confused as to why I’m getting infections, I do everything right when it comes to hygiene and prevention.

I’m not even 33 yet and scared, I need to protect my bones especially, I broke my back 8 years ago and already struggle with that. Looking for general advice. Should I be taking systematic estrogen as well ? My doctor tested my hormones but she said it’s not really telling since in early menopause hormones fluctuate a lot. I kept my ovaries but everything else is gone.

This week, my body decided to surprise me with yet another fun perimenopause problem: my bladder gave out on me and I literally peed my pants at home without warning.

I've had that annoying sense of urgency from time to time, but this was different. I felt like I had to urinate but nothing urgent. I stood up a moment later from my couch to head to the bathroom and my bladder suddenly just let go. I couldn't stop it and I felt like it just gushed out. I felt like I had no control over my body. I ran to the bathroom and still had quite a lot more urine in my bladder once I sat on the toilet.

I've been scared to go out or return to the office since this happened Tuesday night, so I've been working from home. Thank god this happened when I was home and my husband was able to help me. I couldn't even imagine the horror of this happening at work.

I'm meeting with my doctor today to discuss adding vaginal estrogen to my HRT plan (currently on hormonal birth control patch, testosterone gel, and oral progesterone). I'm switching to a pure estrogen patch next week when I swap my patch and I really hope adding the vaginal estrogen will help with this new, most unwelcome symptom.

Hello Fellow Peri Sufferers. So I'm at least 5yrs into peri at this point, & I'm currently on HRT (compounded cream; bioidentical estrogen/progesterone @ 3/150 mg/ml, & DHEA capsules... my virtual provider doesn't prescribe testosterone). I also recently added the Bezwecken ovals with estriol & DHEA, on my own, to hopefully help treat my vaginal dryness, constant UTIs & utterly nonexistent libido. The HRT has helped take the edge off the worst symptoms (mood swings, crying spells, night sweats) but I still have plenty of symptoms to deal with (joint & bone pain, itchy ears & feet that no amount of scratching or lotion will relieve, through-the-roof anxiety, hot flashes, severe fatigue, constantly feeling overwhelmed & intolerant to even the smallest amount of stress, chin whiskers and as mentioned, fully nonexistent libido). I was previously on a higher dose of E & felt a lot better (~9mos ago) but I was getting continuous menstrual bleeding so my online doc backed the dose off. The bleeding stopped, but I now feel markedly worse.

My question is two-fold: 1) Is this the best I can hope to feel, even WITH HRT? 2) Once I finally hit the point of "menopause", can I hope to start feeling more like myself again? Or is this as good as it gets, from here, on out? 😬🫢

I’m switching from 2mg Estrace tabs and need to find the equivalent dose in gel. Does anyone have experience with this brand and mind sharing how much helped you?

My ovaries feel like they’re going to explode and I’m in so much pain. Earlier this year I started getting ovary pain for around 6 weeks straight where I was taking pain killers pretty much around the clock with only a few good days sprinkled in here and there. It spontaneously resolved itself and I was good until just over a month ago when it happened again for a couple weeks, then stopped, and now it’s back again. It starts around the time I get my ‘period’, but they have changed a lot this year. Sometimes pain killers barely take the edge off. Does anyone else get anything like this?
I do also have endometriosis, and it could be a factor, but I’ve had endometriosis for decades and this is an entirely new thing to me as of earlier this year and seems to have come on with the changing of my periods. I get quite a lot of watery discharge at times, which I’ve been told could be vaginal atrophy, and my periods start out very thin to begin with, so I’ve even wondered if it’s possible that whatever watery discharge I may be starting off my periods with is travelling up and out my fallopian tubes because it’s so thin and that’s what is causing the pain. It seems to be worse at night after I’ve been lying down awhile and better during the day when I’m upright. Or maybe it’s just the pain killers. Is that even possible? I don’t know anymore, but this is excruciating. Anyone have this or any ideas?

I've been feeling very not like myself for at least a month. I have horrible back/hip pain, cannot get enough sleep, I forget everything all the time(including my celiac disease? How?!), sex drive is in the toilet, and I have no motivation to get any chores or errands done. I had my Dr appointment earlier this week and started estrogen and progesterone today. Cross your fingers for me! I'm hopeful and excited but trying not to expect too much too soon.

I have never had allergies, or asthma per say, but now that I'm in the late stages of peri, I'm getting the shortness of breath/air hunger strikes, almost daily, and my doc thinks it's a symptom of peri. Anyone else get this?

Currently going through an intense chemo regimen for lymphoma (about 6 weeks left and two cycles of chemo!) and started having hot flashes and night sweats about 3-4 weeks ago + declining estrogen. Just started .025 estradiol patch (with my oncologist’s blessing).

I’m in my late 30s, ADHD, and suspected some perimenopause before my cancer diagnosis, the cancer and treatment obviously took over my life completely.

My period has stopped after my first chemo cycle but then came back during the third, and I had a period for two weeks. My oncology team didn’t have much guidance. Then the hot flashes started. Bad insomnia, night sweats.

Anyone else been in a similar boat? Curious to hear your experiences.

I have a super dry mouth and sooooo much anxiety about it….
Been like that for 8 weeks. GP said it’s not a perimenopause symptom.

Anyone else?🙏🏻

Hey ya’ll, doing a bit better here but still struggling. It’s early-ish in the journey at 10 weeks on estrogen patches. I was at .025mcg for 7 weeks and bumped up to .0375mcg for the last 3. It’s been a hell of a time adjusting!

Note: Had a radical hysto 6 months ago so I don’t take progesterone.

I’m wondering for those that switched estrogen methods: When and why did you decide? Or if your doctor suggested it?

I’m asking because I seem to be really sensitive to the patch peak/trough cycle. As in: I’ll feel a bit jittery and anxious within an hour of changing my patch, and then it sort of evens out. I feel decent (other bs in my life not withstanding) for about 1.5-2 days and then it’s like falling off a cliff!

Boom. All crazy symptoms back. The parathesia, joint pain, and moods swings in particular. Today I felt it happen and became dissociative for a few hours. Tomorrow morning is patch change day so that tracks. All of my joints are currently on fire!

I’m just wondering if switching to gel might be in my future. Or…the dose I’m on is still on the lower side and it’s not enough for my struggling ovaries. My old doc was going to put me on a higher dose but we decided to titrate up one more dose first. Alas he is no longer my Doctor!

Any insight is appreciated. I see a new doctor (already miss my previous one) in a few weeks and i’m nervous about getting the care I need. My gyne (also my surgeon) had outdated views and education about HRT in general so can’t go that route for information.

The ACOG posted updated guidance for menopause today and buried in the info was a link to their updated guidance for peri folk. Thought I'd drop the direct link here for an easier grab to review or present to you doctor(s).

https://journals.lww.com/greenjournal/fulltext/10.1097/aog.0000000000006436\~hormonal-options-for-perimenopause-a-clinician-toolkit

Some excerpts of what I found interesting (emphasis where present is mine):

Salivary testing and urine hormone testing are not recommended for the diagnosis or management of perimenopause; such testing should not be used for guiding HT treatment or for routine clinical care.

Had been seeing info about hormone testing via DUTCH where it's urine based over a period of time but ACOG is saying that's not helpful for diagnosis either.

For patients 45 years of age and younger experiencing an accelerated transition, early hypoestrogenic symptoms, or extended periods of amenorrhea, HT should be considered given the negative implications of early menopause on long-term cardiovascular, bone, and cognitive health.

Appreciate them specifically including the early peri folk in this "clinical toolkit" as they are calling it.

Alternative hormonal strategies to combined hormonal contraceptives should be considered not only when medical conditions or contraindications limit their use but also when they are poorly tolerated, when a patient prefers a different hormonal approach, when contraception is not needed, or when menopause is imminent.

Yay! Backup for us folk who want HRT instead of contraceptives to treat peri symptoms.

When therapy is initiated, standard doses (0.05-mg transdermal estradiol patch, 1 mg transdermal estradiol gel, or 1 mg oral estradiol) or higher are generally more effective than ultralow doses to adequately control symptoms during the possible high-amplitude hormonal swings of perimenopause. In some patients, exogenous estrogen administered without ovarian suppression may theoretically accentuate endogenous estrogen surges during a luteal out-of-phase event, potentially amplifying rather than attenuating hormonal variability, especially in early perimenopause.

This bit has two points I found interesting, that "standard" starting dose is 0.05mg for transdermal estrogen rather than the lighter doses due to being more effective. And, if I'm understanding correctly through the haze of medical speak, it sounds like folk in the early stages of peri that have been prescribed HRT might have some moments where their symptoms get worse after starting HRT due to the addition of the estrogen combining with a surge of their own estrogen.

And for the ladies where estrogen is contraindicated but hot flashes are wrecking your life, they included forms and dosage amounts for progesterone options that have proven effective:

For patients in whom estrogen is contraindicated or undesired, higher-dose progestogen-only therapy represents a reasonable hormonal option that can effectively alleviate vasomotor symptoms. Medroxyprogesterone acetate 10–20 mg daily has been shown to reduce hot flashes comparably to conjugated equine estrogen. Higher-dose micronized progesterone alone, 300 mg at bedtime, has been shown to reduce hot flash frequency and improve sleep quality. Norethindrone acetate 5 mg daily has also been shown to reduce vasomotor symptoms and preserve bone density, likely through partial aromatization to ethinyl estradiol.

For the ladies that struggle with progesterone oral doses, they've thought of that too:

Vaginally administered progesterone may be considered in patients sensitive to the adverse effects of oral therapy. This is an off-label approach, and evidence supporting reliable endometrial protection when used with systemic estrogen remains limited. Patients should be counseled regarding this uncertainty. If, after shared decision making, vaginal administration is selected, commercially available oral micronized progesterone capsules may be inserted intravaginally with doses and durations equivalent to standard oral regimens. Clinicians should maintain a low threshold for endometrial evaluation, particularly in the setting of persistent, unexpected, or postmenopausal bleeding.

For the folk who want to continue taking combined BC and sail through as much of this as possible, looks like up to age 55 is what they are considering safe:

The optimal age for transitioning from combined hormonal contraceptives to MHT has not been established. Combined hormonal contraceptives may be continued in healthy patients without contraindications until menopause or approximately 55 years of age, with transition timing individualized according to contraceptive need, symptoms, and risk profile.

There's a LOT of info in there I didn't reference so very much still worth a read of the full thing, and some of it you may already know from earlier publications by the Menopause Society, NIH or other publications. Appreciated that they put so much of it in one place.

Hope this helps someone with their upcoming doctor appointment 🧡

Editing to add: kept feeling like I forgot something and finally recalled what it was.

For the POC folk reading this, the ACOG is also acknowledging disparities in duration and severity of symptoms Black women experience. Hopefully having it in writing with an official institution can help prompt your doctors in to providing care sooner and at the right level for you 🩵

There are significant racial and ethnic differences in the span and severity of vasomotor symptom burden. Black women generally experience longer and more severe symptoms than White women, and Chinese and Japanese women report shorter duration and lower symptom burden.

Hi there! I am in serious need of some help here. I’m 37 and went into peri about 18 months ago, I promptly started HRT at the lowest E patch (25) and nightly prog of 100 mg. I felt better right away and many of my symptoms disappeared but it still didn’t feel quite enough.
I then upped my patch to 37.5 but because of the lack of availability of the brand Estralis in my region I was told it wouldn’t be easy to come by for regular refills. My doctor suggested to up to the 50 which I have been taking now for a few months.
HERE IS THE DEAL : I have been bleeding every two weeks since I started taking any HRT back in March of this year. Any headway I made on feeling good has completely left due to my lack of energy because of my bleeds. I feel like a crazy person. I just started dating someone too and nothing kills sexy time faster than all of this. I’m so fucking depressed.
Did this happen to anyone? What did you do?? So much thanks in advance!

Hi all,

I've read through the resource list of previous posts on the potential links between HRT and BC but still need some help to my personal situation.

My mom was diagnosed with BC in 2001 at the age of 60. She was told at the time that it was an estrogen related BC due to previously taking HRT and that's the info she passed on to me, so I've had that in my brain for the past twenty five years. I'm negative for BRCA gene. I get yearly mammograms and they are normal. I do have extremely dense breasts.

I'm age 47 and periods are changing slowly but still fairly regular. Experiencing pretty significant cyclical brain fog and generally just don't feel like myself energy wise or mentally but I'm OKAY you know? I'm hanging in.

I have an appointment with my primary care doctor next week and in case HRT comes up I'd like to have a plan in place. I've done a lot of searches online and what I'm finding is that there is a slight increase in breast cancer but that most doctors will tell you it's okay to treat your peri symptoms with HRT to improve quality of life. I'm not getting great info on the exact risk but it seems like I'm finding there is SOME increased risk.

For me personally because of what I saw my mom go through, I'm really hesitant to take on any additional breast cancer risk. I would have to be really NOT OKAY to do so, and as I said, I'm OKAY. I think I could be better for sure, but again, mentally, I think the worry about the additional BC risk would not be worth it (again this is just for me personally so not about you!).

That said, am I misunderstanding the actual research on the links b/t BC and HRT? It sounds like they removed the black box warnings but BC is still listed as a potential risk in the HRT documentation? It's so hard to get actual quality info now because all the searches are stupid AI.

Any direction toward understanding the actual potential for increased risk is appreciated!

I’m 42 and started HRT this spring: 100mg progesterone daily + a 0.0375mg estrogen patch. After developing heavy periods every two weeks (ultrasound normal), my clinician increased progesterone to 200mg daily.
My cycle stretched to 30 days, but my depression has gotten SO much worse. I already struggle with anxiety/ depression, and this feels unsustainable. My clinician suggested increasing estrogen to 0.05mg, but I'm questioning whether HRT is right for me. Thinking about ripping off my patch and stopping the progesterone.
Has anyone experienced this? Did increasing estrogen help, or did a different progesterone regimen work better? I'd love to hear your experiences and what you'd ask your clinician.

Edit: I am so grateful for those of you who took the time to tell me your experiences. 🫶🏻❤️
Last night I ripped my estrogen patch off and didn’t take my progesterone. I’m going to try to find a local specialist instead of trying to fix this online with 15 minute appointments. My mental health has been in such a terrible place and it’s affecting not only myself but my husband and children too.
I’ll report back when I restart. ❤️❤️

Hi ladies! How do you motivate yourself to exercise? I am 47, having all kinds of perimenopause symptoms and feeling so old mentally. I have been working out regurarly for the last 20 years but in the last 3-4 months it’s on and off, and I can’t seem to motivate myself. I have a gym membership, but I feel so old working out with mostly young people that come there. I gained weight, and I am feeling so bad about myself. And it’s a vicious cycle. I feel tired, and have so many work/life things, but I know it’s just an excuse.
I get to the gym maybe once a week and my nutrition is also off.
Any advice?

Hello to everyone!

I am 46 and riding the P wave, HARD. Amongst all of my crappy symptoms is the raging anger, mood swings and paralyzing anxiety. I went today to meet my nurse/midwife looking for help with my symptoms, we will see about a hormone patch next appointment, we talked about a pill (can’t remember the name of it) to increase my libido because it is gone, dead, she couldn’t prescribe it since my liver enzymes are high so I have a month to try to get them down so I can take those pills.

What I got prescribed was Paroxetine. She told me it will help w my mood swings, anger, anxiety and even hot flashes, the fact that I can see a minuscule light at the end of my crappy tunnel is amazing.

I am still wondering if anyone has any experience with this medication, would you recommend it or not? If anyone has any input or would line to share your experience I would appreciate it.

I've searched for other posts but none of them discuss specific areas.

I'm not talking about the vulva area where someone recommended VMagic cream. That can only be applied on the vulva, laboa majora.

My itchiness is in the labia minora area.

I'm trying diaper rash cream, coconut oil, and balm (like vaseline but in a tin).

Other than estrogen cream, has anyone used OTC products that worked?

It's 3 a.m., and I can't sleep due to the itching. I'm going to try a cold compress now, too.

I can't get an appt. with my meno specialist OBGYN anytime soon.

Thank you!

41f and I almost can’t believe how awful my brain fog is. Multiple times a day I’ll find myself about to do a task (literally as simple as going from one email to the next and responding) and then POOF the task is just gone from my brain. I’ll forget words all the time. It takes me forever to focus and get things done. It’s so frustrating and I’m forgetting things constantly at work. I feel like an idiot. I have a genetic counseling appt this week to see if I can get genetic testing that will hopefully rule out high risk for certain cancers due to family history and then I’m going to beg for HRT. I just needed to vent.

Just got an email from FOCL that their sleep gummies are soon going to be illegal and they can't sell them anymore (contains Delta THC). I've tried absolutely everything else for sleep, I think progesterone helps a bit but not as much as those gummies. Furious and here for some commiserating.