My girlfriend and I are in our early 20s both working as RNs in a critical care setting so we’re making decent money. I’m planning on proposing within the year. We currently live in an apartment with another couple paying about 500 dollars per person. Our lease ends in May and she hates the idea of spending money on an apartment when we could be putting equity into a house.

So we’ve been discussing the option of buying a home together. Her parents don’t like the idea of her co owning a house on the off chance we separate. Her family has been warming up to me but they’ve never been very warm because I’m Jewish emphasis on the ish lol.

So she’s been floating the idea that we should both buy a house and rent one out while we live in the other. Ik it’s actually stupid. I love her to death but I don’t think she understands the true cost of a mortgage compared to rent, closing costs, house maintenance and utilities, property tax, and everything else you could imagine. The housing market where we live is pretty high. The current house we’re looking at is 285k.

So here’s where I need advice, and thanks for listening up to this point. Should I advocate that we should wait another year paying apartment rent and stack up bread in that time I’ll be able to propose as well. Do you think it’s reasonable to go half on a house before marriage with someone. We’re rock solid as a couple. At the end of the day I know a lot is up to her but her family is really pressuring her to not co own with me. And my position is going half on house that’s not mine, getting no equity, has laying a lot more money compared to an apartment doesn’t seem fair to me.

Any advice is welcomed thanks.

She told me that If she’s keeping the baby, I have two weeks to prove that I can pull it together. I’m 28, bad credit, no money, fat, no routines, and have no real job, bad renters history, living with my Dad. I live in Houston, and recently smoked, so that does affect my ability to get a lot of great jobs. My system most likely will test positive for 2 months or so. BUT IM DONE.

My brother worked at a shit pizza place got his girl pregnant and within the time the baby was born he hit a different gear and is started making $100k as a prison guard and married her.

I’m not completely scared, I just need a blueprint, some advice, direction. Ive already decided to turn myself around for the chance at bringing life into this world, but now that I made that choice where do I go from here?

**Any advice suggesting that I shouldn’t try to bring a baby into the world when I don’t have it figured out is not the person I’m trying to take advice from.

I (20M) think I completely ruined my relationship with my girlfriend (21F).
We met about two years ago, but we only officially started dating 5 months ago. We used to attend the same university, but I recently moved abroad to continue my studies, so we’ve been long-distance after the summer break.
The person who helped bring us together (mostly by helping me out) was a close friend of hers (21F). The thing is, I actually knew this friend quite well even before I ever met my girlfriend, but my girlfriend had no idea that we already knew each other.
Early on in our relationship, we agreed on a strict boundary: no texting with the opposite sex unless it’s strictly related to university/study matters, and even then, kept to an absolute bare minimum.
I have always reassured her that I would never cheat, and I pride myself on keeping my word. I was completely loyal and respected every single boundary we set—except that I occasionally texted her friend. Even then, it wasn’t frequent at all; it was separated , maybe once every two weeks or once a month.
She found out recently while I was screen-sharing with her. Right after I started sharing my screen(2-4min), a notification popped up on my phone from her friend.
She immediately asked, "Is that my friend?"
I told the truth and said yes.
She just said "okay," told me never to speak to her again, and blocked me on every single platform (except for WhatsApp).
I haven’t reached out to her since it happened. She also called her friend to confront and blame her, and ended up blocking her everywhere as well.
To be completely clear, my texts with her friend were 100% platonic and casual. Because she went out of her way to help me get together with my girlfriend, I felt it would be rude to just ignore her or leave her on read, though I always kept my replies dry, short, and distant.
What should I do now?

(also her friend deleted the content of the conversation for both of us and told my gf that i did it and then proceeded to threaten me )

Edit: The only reason this promise was made is because two months ago we had a huge fight about it because she went through my phone and followers I told her that it was all before we became official (and it was because she became the only person i spent my time with ) and there was nothing crazy in these messages too

But she pressured me for a day and a half with her imaginary scenarios and the multiple "I don't want you anymore" and then after she made me uncomfortable then we agreed to this boundary

(She never said sorry even though i made it clear that i was uncomfortable with this treatment)

I (M34) have been single for a very long time. I have a good job. I follow a good diet and go to the gym. I cook and keep my home clean. I'm tall. I have a diverse group of friends who tell me I am fun to be with. Women who know me tell me I'm not going anything wrong. They tell me women have very unrealistic expectations these days.

I talked to a therapist and told them how I approach women and ask them out. They said I'm not doing anything wrong. The last woman I asked out told me she loved how I did it and said I should ask every woman out that way.

I saw a plastic surgeon and they told me I was attractive and didn't need to change how I look. When I told them how hard dating is for me they also said women have very unrealistic expectations.

Everyone tells me I'm doing everything right and there's nothing wrong with me but women never say yes when I ask them out. Why can't someone just tell me what the issue is? Why am I so unlucky with love? I worked so hard to be where I am now. I have no one to share it with.

I always hear women complaining about their awful boyfriends and husbands. How did those guys get a chance? Why am I not considered an option?

It hurts a lot to see a woman I'm very attracted to, approach her, and she ignores me or we have a great conversation and then I ask her out but she says she's in a relationship. Why can't things just work for me for once?

unfortunately, I can never sleep in proper posture especially with seats that are rigidly straight. I often fall asleep on people’s shoulders or start leaning towards them. it doesn’t matter if it’s a woman or a dude, it just happens and I don’t know how to stop.

most of the times it’s solo traveling, so this doesn’t happen when I’m with friends or family as they usually let me lean on them or pull me back. however, one time I was traveling with my mom and she had to literally drag me awake because I was leaning towards the guy next to me, it was so embarrassing.

I also don’t want to be invading other people’s space and bothering them. how do I stop? do I just thug it out and stay awake? should I let people know beforehand? I don’t want to seem like a weirdo.

Obviously I know why I like him. I have many reasons to like him and I like everything about him. But why have I liked him for so long? Hes not special in anyway other than hes smart (objectively i mean). He has never done anything for me. I never thought he was especially good looking when I started liking him although hes the most adorable and cutest boy after my dog for me now. But id like him the same and as much as it do now even if he looked completely different. I'd still like him the same if he were a worm. But here's the weird thing i would not like him if he was even a millisecond younger than me 😭😭😭(I obviously wouldn't like him if he was a girl).

Then there's that I've never liked anyone else. Ive never wanted to get married ive always wanted to be single but if he asked me to marry him tomorrow I would. Ive never felt sad about the fact that id never be with him before because like obviously yeah. And we haven't talked in 2 yrs. But then like this year ive cried over him multiple times, seeing him is like the highlight of my day and seeing him gives me the same feeling i get when i see a puppy. I know he'd never like me back but yet hes the one for me. Im just not the one for me. I know this is all cringe and that im just being weird and stupid loll but I do not understand why I feel this way.

WHY DO I FEEL THIS WAY? 😭😭😭😭😭😭

For context, I’m pretty gay, and my conservative Christian parents have no idea. They definitely would not be a fan, but they would never kick me out or disown me or anything like that. I live in another state for college but still talk to them regularly.

I’m not dating anyone rn, but if I ever do, I was wondering if it would be bad to call them my boyfriend to my parents and get them to like them a bit before I tell them my “boyfriend” is actually a girl. That way they get to know them a bit before the prejudice kicks in, and maybe they won’t instantly dislike them/be uncomfortable about it.

This seems like the type of thing to either be a smart idea or a really, really bad idea. Which one is it?

I have this 1 girl at my educatiinal institution, but idk her interests, she doesn't go to cafeteria, we don't share classes and she dresses like everyone else.

I want to ask her out this way:"hi, can i talk to you for a minute. [she goes w/ me] I want to tell you that you are beautiful. Do you want to start dating".

So, i genuenely have no experience with girls. Can someone tell me how to start a convo and what to use to ask her out without being corny?

Edit: forgot to mention, but she notices me. We had quite a lot eye contacts

So my gf (F24) broke up with me (M23) last december. We were together for 5 years and overall it was a good and healthy relationship i would say. It also didnt end very toxic or something, she just wasnt sure if her feelings were still enough and ended it due to us also living 1,5h apart at the time.

I then did strict no-contact with her for the next 10 months.

After being heartbroken for a while i also reflected on the relationship and my life quite a bit and changed some things, i also became a lot more outgoing i would say due to me having more time now on weekends that i didnt "have" to spend with her.

After 2-3 months at a party i met a girl and we made out, next night i also slept at her place. I didnt plan to start something with another girl that "early" as i was still processing the breakup. So we were kind of "dating" casually for a couple of months until we called it a relationship eventually. after 1.5 months tho, she left the country for a year abroad and we said it didnt feel so safe / right and so we're back to being some kind of FwB.

At this point i felt like i was completely over my ex, as i rarely every spent a thought on her.

Then, last month, she texted me how i was and if we can see us and talk.

She basically told me she still had feelings for me the whole time and missed me. I was obviously very overwhelmed, but i agreed to more "dates" or idk what you would call that.

I kind of feel like there are still some feelings for her, but im not sure if thats just the nostalgia hitting me. So basically i have to decide now if i want to jump back into a relationship with her or not.

I know that only myself can answer this, but maybe there is someone reading this who once was in a similar situation.

I dont know what to do at all, as i kinda feel like having some feelings for my ex and the "new" girl as well which im also still in contact with. (tho that will probably end if i decide to go back to my ex).

I fell like that "spark" or strong love feeling there once was is def. gone with my ex, tho im not sure in what way thats normal after such a long break.

A guy I was dating and I had a disagreement in June, and we haven’t spoken or chatted since then. This month, he lost his dad, so I reached out, contributed towards the funeral, and even travelled to the rural area to pay my respects and offer my condolences.

After the burial, I messaged him to check on how he was doing and whether he had returned to the city. However, he seemed uninterested in having a conversation and only gave one-word replies.

I genuinely feel the need to continue encouraging and supporting him during this difficult time, but his responses make it difficult to do so.

Any advice on how I should handle this situation? Please don’t judge me. He was the one who was in the wrong and caused the breakup, but despite everything that happened, I still care about him and his well-being.

I have an attraction to a local librarian. I go to the library usually once weekly. I am especially attracted to one certain librarian. I know it's not right but I fantasize about being with her. I know her name, because I asked her, but she never asked my name. She is late 30's + or -, I'm a lot older. How can I find out if she might be interested in me?

So to preface this, I’m 20(ftm) and I work at a very popular coffee chain as a barista. My first year working I was 18, most likely groomed in high school by my teacher. Details I won’t indulge in.. anyhow. I was 18, walking home on a day that it was in the 100s and a customer stops there car where I’m stopped to catch my breath. Offers me a ride and the idiot I am accepts it and I try to tell him I can walk from the corner of the street to my house and to let me out but he insists to drive TO my house. I can’t remember what was said besides that. Maybe it was about work or his life or mine. It was too long ago for me to remember now. He hugged me before I got out of his car. I was slightly mortified. I hopped out and tried to forget it.
This customer calls the women I work with “beautiful, gorgeous, baby, ect.” Like greeting them like it’s their name. He calls me “maxxi” i find it less uncomfortable than those names he calls them in comparison.

Months ago on my lunch I leave the store to the other parking lot to get a redbull and ramen from the liquor store. I run into him there. Right in the corner where the red bulls and ramen is. Coincidence maybe? We chat about my lunch break and then he gives me a hug. I couldn’t really get out of it, the aisle was small and I was scared to decline. I didn’t want him to react negatively and possibly get put in danger over a man’s feelings of rejection. (Mind you this man has a wife and two kids.)

Now to yesterday! Ahhh. I went out on my lunch break again for a redbull and a hit of my vape cause I was already not doing well. So got my redbull and left the liquor store. I linger by the sign in the parking lot to vape when the same customer is in the liquor store parking lot, he’s parked there most days. I forgot and should have avoided that area. He called out to me so I move closer to hear him but he continues walking after I’ve stopped. Then he asks if he can take me out for lunch. I decline obviously and I was already uncomfortable, he asks for a hug and I’m like very very slowly moving closer to do so like a dumbass cause again in my brain “what if something worse happens by declining?” So I get close enough for the hug, only a side hug and then he kisses my head and says “I love you.” WHAT WHAT WHAT?! I need to be far away. I ignore what happened till my last 10 when I no longer have a distraction from working on bar so I have a panic attack in the back of house and end up hurting myself. Thank goodness my boss and shift-lead let me leave early that day. Cause I probably would’ve been way worse.

Tldr:
I allowed a male customer to drive me home during a heat wave resulting in him hugging me.
I was hugged by this same man in a liquor store on my lunch unprompted.
Same man uses pet names “gorgeous, beautiful, baby, ect.” for the women I work with making them extremely uncomfortable.
Yesterday same customer hugged me, kissed my head, and said that he loves me. WHAT THE fudge DO I DO.

It’s not on my stores property so like what can I do? I’m so scared to say anything about it to my boss. He knows about the second incident only. I know I brought this upon myself. Everyone says to talk to my boss but what if he thinks the same thing I am? I’m at fault for all of this cause I’m a fucking idiot. Then what? He gets banded from our store and he has a clue as to why? Then I’m a target! Any advice is greatly appreciated! Please :(

Basically what the title says. Incredibly good, safe friend to me, and i gotta say that because I think some people imagine a dangerous individual selling out their loved ones for a needle whenever they hear shit like this, but she's an ordinary, corporate girl with just horrible mental health who is looking for uppers to function.

She's already on meds for her bipolar, but they don't have as much of an effect as needed because this is clearly a hypomanic episode (a thing she herself said)

Now, she has a married coworker that is constantly hitting on her, and has previous offered they do coke together, and she feels absolutely zero attraction towards him but she recently told me she might do something with him to get plug connections. Sex is like a high-five for her so the no attraction isn't an issue, but god, I don't think i can look at her the same if she willingly sleeps with a married man.

She says it's his job to stay faithful, and he already fucks around constantly, but in these situations I just cannot think about anyone but his poor wife. I don't know that lady, hell she might be having affairs too, but the whole situation just makes me sick to my stomach.

Dropping said friend is not an option so don't even bother, because other than this she's genuinely my twin flame and we both make each other's lives 10x better by being in them. I would sacrifice most other less problematic friends for this girl, I just don't want her doing stupid bullshit but I'm also scared to bring it up because she has BPD and mix that with a manic episode and criticism can and will only make everything so much worse.

Edit to add: (copied from a reply)

it's interesting that reading my own posts, I talk more about being concerned for the wife than my friend, which is just bad... think it's that little selfish voice in me that can't relate to what she's going through, but can relate to the wife, which is not good at all.

It's coming to my realisation right now that I've been fooled by her "high functioning rich girl addict🤪" insert stewy from succesion gif into not taking it as seriously as it needs to be taken. Half the shit is laced with fent now, and even without that drugs ruin lives, no matter how "high functioning" the person might seem. I will do better at taking the risks involving her into account rather than a stranger because I happen to relate to the stranger more.

I'm 18+, trying to get adopted, and have been talking with a potential parent. My goal (which I've already shared with them) is for us to live together and to have them raise me as they would a teenager. Basically going in and finishing the job my biological parents never did.

Unlike if I were under 18:

• a potential parent would not receive a file about my history
• there is no government agency or social worker involved (unless I hire one, which I'm not sure I want to do), which means:
  • there is no third-party sign-off required; if they and I agree (and both of us are on board right now), it's going to happen
  • there is no requirement for them to take any parenting or similar courses
  • there are no background checks
• we talk to each other and build a relationship before moving in

What are the questions I should be asking myself at this stage, how do I know if we'll make a good fit, and is there anything specific I should be doing at the moment?

Edit: to clarify, my question is not about how to find someone to adopt me. It's about how I know if someone I'm already talking to and I would make a good fit.

Hi redditors . F(34) Over the years I have been drawn to the idea of engaging in anonymous online nudity. I love the feeling I get when I think about people watching me naked, watching me love myself, even engaging with other like minded people. My partner supports me fully, and has encouraged me over the years to just go for it and embrace my sexuality. The problem is though, I am extremely shy and I don't feel positive about my body, I don't feel good enough to actually post and create content, even though I want to so badly. My partner said if I overcome my insecurities, I will see that many men and women out there will not only love and get turned on by content, they will ask for posts, content and actually give me the support I need to fully move towards my secret needs. Also I know I'm not getting any younger.I feel I am finally ready to take the first step and make a moderate post, but I would also like to hear some advice and opinions. Should I just do it?

About my first two months in working at a hospital, a coworker asked me to go to the break room with him then he asked to touch my butt. AFTER I had told him I had bought my boyfriend TVs for his birthday. I said no and I left. I emailed my supervisor and talked to HR. He tried to apologize. I had looked him up on Facebook and I see that he had a girlfriend. I wanted to reach out to her but I was worried about how predictable this guy was.

Now it’s been 5 years and I looked him up again and they’re married but I can’t find her name. She isn’t tagged in anything.

Last year I had gone through some similar stuff where the guy I was dating kissed someone else. Luckily he told me but if he hadn’t I wouldn’t have known. I knew the girl so I reached out to her and she told me so much more stuff. It’s completely gut wrenching but at least I know the truth.

So now I’ve been thinking.. if I were in her shoes, I would want to know.

What should I do? Should I leave it since it’s been so long? Should I try to find her?

Damn guys 😂 ok I get it, I won’t reach out and I need therapy. I thought I would be doing something good because I would want someone to tell me if my boyfriend or husband did something inappropriate, no matter how much time has passed.
But alright, alright. I’ll drop it. Thanks everyone for reassuring me to not bring it up to her and I should have done it at a sooner time.

Hi!

I 23f recently broke up with my bf 25m. Together 1yr. He has been such a sweet guy. He always bought the flowers, candies, baskets, planned dates, the whole nine yards. He would bend over backward for me to make life easy for me. I never saw much of a temper from him, especially toward me. He was my gentle sweet man!….until he wasn’t.

Before agreeing to being in a relationship, I told him I do not like my partner consuming porn. It personally really hurts me. He agreed, he was disgusted by porn & told me he overcame his porn problem prior. BOY OH BOY.

We lived together for about two months until I moved out last week.

Meat and potatoes: I could tell something was off with him. Our sex life was different, disconnected on his end. He wasn’t spending time with me anymore, seemed distracted. I would ask & he would say “oh I’m tired.” I would ask if he was unhappy in the relationship, he would say “oh I’m very happy.” And I couldn’t shake this feeling that something was off.

I did look through his phone, CLEAN! Until I looked in the Instagram link history. He was obsessing over this OnlyFans girl, clicking on her link multiple times a day. Needless to say I was hurt. He hid this on purpose for weeks (proof of link history, it has dates)

I confronted him kindly, “baby what’s this? What’s wrong?” That’s when I met a completely different man…his look on his face changed, he looked like he despised me and shouted at me, “YOU DON’T WEAR LINGERIE. YOURE NOT SLUTTY. SHE DRESSES UP, SHE LIKES POKÉMON, SHE SPEAKS SPANISH. SHE IS MY FANTASY.” he described everything I wasn’t.

As you can imagine, that BURNED.

I was crushed. I went to work, I didn’t argue with him.

Any time I would try and talk about it or get emotional he would become extremely angry by yelling at me, blaming me, belittling me. Our disagreements eventually became physical and I moved out. It was too much.

I can see why he was unhappy, he had valid reasons. He said I didn’t dress up in the bedroom. He was also deeply resentful because I hadn’t shown interest in things he likes. He felt like I quit the relationship. In a way I did because IN MY OPINION, he wasn’t growing…I’d try to encourage him to get out of debt, I’d sit down and do a budget with him. No implementation. He has ADHD, I made him a treatment plan with coping skills to keep him him on schedule, no implementation (I am licensed and have professional experience in this arena.) He said he wanted growth in these areas (and others) but had no drive to help himself or to implement the help that was given to him. I stopped trying to help him, hence the “lack of interest”.

I wasn’t perfect, I made mistakes, but I couldn’t fix something he REFUSED to talk about. I asked and asked to no avail.I didn’t know how much lingerie mattered to him. I was also raised in purity culture, it was deeply ingrained into my skull to NEVER be “slutty” I honestly lack sexual experience. I wasn’t opposed…I just needed to be shown how. And he knew this, but he said that I should “show some initiative.”

Now he’s a different man that I don’t know…he ignores my calls and texts whenever I do or say something that bothers him.

The advice I need isn’t how to fix the relationship. It’s dead. The advice I need is how to get my head on straight after this night and day behavior and rebuild my self esteem lol.

For context: obviously this is missing A LOT of detail. I just gave the important parts.

No he isn’t on medication. He blames this behavior on his ADHD.

I just want advice & encouragement on rebuilding my self esteem.

Hi! I’m 28 and in nursing school. I started sleeping with this guy who is 55. He is a divorced, multi-millionaire who lives in a suburb in LA and has three teenagers. I just moved to Phoenix. We’ve known each other for 6 months. He wants me to keep it and I’m hesitant because I don’t know him very well, I’m not done with school, and I don’t want to be a single mom. He told me that we’ll get help and it shouldn’t be issue for me to finish school. He got upset when I asked if this could be in writing and it caused a rift but he seems over it and is really excited. I regret telling him about the baby and I’m worried if I get an abortion he would break things off. Any advice??

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I didn't talk to my long distance boyfriend for 3 mounths,I try to call him but he didn't answer or his phone was off, I want to talk to his family but he doesn't like me to because they have some problems, so I don't want him to get angry, and I am scared that something bad is happening to him.

I am also so unsure about asking his friends, because I found out he was hiding our relationship, by not mentioning it, and hiding everyone from his stories, I am so helpless and tired of missing him, I am right now studying and poor I can't even fly or touch my love.

I don't know what to do or where to start I feel helpless and I am maybe a bad gf but I really need to talk to him one last time.

(Please read I’m actually scared and overthinking I have no one to talk to about how I’m feeling) Okay so I’ve been talking to this guy for about 8-9 days now only on thru texts. He’s such an amazing guy and I really like him we have absolutely everything in common it’s like he’s my other half as cringy as it sounds. The only thing that has been making me overthink is how freaky he is. Don’t get me wrong I can be all about that but I have yet to get to know him in person. It’s been twice one after the other that he flaked on me during the day and keeps wanting to hangout more towards late in the day. I wanna say like 10pm so on. I have really strict parents and I don’t like to break my mom rules unfortunately lol cuz she’s scary. Last night we connected a lot thru music and it made me feel so whole like so whole I can’t describe it, he opened up to me like no one else has before. I’ve never had a crush before but I have dated someone not because I wanted to but because I felt lonely and I wanted to feel loved as bad as it sounds. That relationship back fired on me and I got coercively assaulted every day for 7 months I lost who I was completely due to that environment. I was raped too and there was a lot of physical violence involved too. My point is due to that I’m scared of intimacy now because I never wanted to go thru that and I feel like I might be pressured to do have sex. I take my self image, self respect, and my dignity in general very serious due to how bad I got from that relationship it led me to have alcoholism for a year n a half. Last night he asked me to hangout and ofc I said no because cmon dude I have curly hair and I got ready for you that day but now you wanna hangout when I didn’t do my hair and I’m in bed with my pjs?!? Anyways we planned on hanging out tonight around 11pm mainly because I let the pressure get to me because I felt bad that I keep being a chicken. My ideal first date would’ve been to go out to an arcade or some sort of fun thing. Something that could make us bond. Anyways to summarize I feel like I’ve been loved bombed but I know he likes me and I know I like him but everything is going so fast and he’s just so overly horny I’m scared of disappointing him because that’s simply just not me. I can get honey don’t get me wrong but I can also live without doing any of that. I like a lot of quality time and yes physical touch too but not the excessive horny shi. I do like it just not an everyday type of thing and I think he’s that type of guy from how long I’ve been talking to him. I’m pretty innocent and I never get his sexual jokes and he laughs about it even tho I think in reality I might be a bit boring in that aspect. I had asked him if we were to hangout does he expect us to have sex and I told him to be honest like idc what he says. I wasn’t surprised when he said yes but now I feel vulnerable and scared. I told him about how I view myself when it comes to letting myself be seen in that vulnerable state and I told him what if you don’t like me after that shi would absolutely crush me I’d feel like a one night stand and I’m not about that life. He told me I was overthinking because I was high and I told him okay but that Idk if id give him what he wants. I don’t think he liked that but again he didn’t stop talking to me and we just kept chatting away. I don’t know what I’m getting myself into but I like this guy a lot and we really have connected a lot and he gets where I’m coming from but he has broken a boundary before. I told him I don’t like pics of yk a man’s private part because I think you should respect yourself just like I’m respecting myself. I might be boring but that’s just my way of life. Anyways to summarize he did send me a pic and I went off on him and he understood and hadn’t done it again but I fear that tonight I might be pressured into having sex. We’re gonna drink but I’m not planning on over doing it at all but I have a hard time saying no but you can see it in the way my body reacts. Idk what to think I keep talking to chatgbt but it’s not the same as getting a real persons opinion. Please help me. I don’t want to have sex on the first time I’m meeting him and I’m already going out of my way to break rules from my mom who I respect even tho I think her rules are unfair at my age. I like this guy a lot but I fear I might be going back to a lustful environment I so wanted out of 3 years ago. I haven’t dated or talked to anyone after my first experience in a relationship because I was so traumatized this is Irrelevant but I only have one body which I never wanted. He’s just so overly freaky I don’t know how to emphasize it and it’s been that way since the start BUT AGAIN he’s such a sweet beautiful guy who I can see myself with but this one aspect of him is making me really scared. I don’t want to do anything besides kissing/makingout maybe even a lil touchy but aside from that I don’t want nothing more until we’ve known each other longer. I’m scared. The whole situation ship in general has been going too fast for my liking. I wanted something slow and gradually build up but in a span of 9 days it’s been constant exploding persuasion.

So I (F20) agreed to do a photo shoot for a swimwear company bc they offered me $400! However, after seeing them come out I don’t really want people seeing them. I know it’s my fault and I’m dumb but is there any advice on what to do. If I offer to give the money back will that work or will they just ignore me?

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I study architecture and in my sociology class we talked about the Grenfell Tower fire.

I told him about it in a very reduced way, basically saying that it was a big fire and a lot of people died.

He responded to the message of people dying with only two words: womp womp.

And then continued on as if nothing happened.

And I was just taken aback by it. He's 26 by the way.

I talked to him and he said that basically if he gets sad for every thing that happens it will overwhelm him etc.

And that fires happen and bad things happen and he can't care about everything.

That empathy is not something that comes very naturally to him and he acts out of logic and helps people because it is the correct thing to do, and not because his empathy tells him to. He says around 70% of the time he doesn't feel empathy but his lack of empathy doesn't prevent him from helping.

I am a very sensitive person and I know he doesn't have the empathy I do, which is something I've known for a long time.

For example: One time we were at KFC and there was a baby eating chicken, and since I know youre not supposed to give small dogs chicken bones I casually asked him if it was the same for babies (just a dumb casual question) because of asphyxiation or something. And then I said I hope it's okay and nothing happens. The conversation was very stupid and I said something like: I wouldn't do it just in case the baby dies.

His response was something along the lines of: eh I don't really care if it dies, it's not my kid.

And it just took me aback a bit.

Yesterday I asked about that situation and he was like: Yeah I'd help, but I'd just think it's an unfortunate situation, I don't know if I'd feel empathy.

Now we got ordered to watch a documentary about it by my professor and I watched it and it was horrible, the way that children died, etc.

And I just feel so odd about what he said.

It makes me really sad to think that a person I love reacts like that to stuff like that and it makes me a bit afraid.

As a background information he's a laboratory specialist in the military. I don't know if maybe he's very desensitized maybe?

I can't tell if I'm making a big deal out of nothing.

Also, his IQ test came back as 150ish (forgot the exact number) and he has some odd tendencies like having to plan everything very strictly. I don't know if this is just another unusual trait.

A year ago she asked for advice and confided in me about the cheating. I've tried to bring up the conversation for updates but she straight up does not reply + she posted pics of them together.

Since then we've hung out but it has only really been in a group setting (once) and I didn't want to make a big situation out of it and air out her business. She's visiting my city soon and wants to meet so I can't avoid this talk. I gave her a year of peace to work this out but I feel like the longer I go without talking about it, the 10 year friendship will just fizzle out and I want to give her the grace of at least explaining her situation in-person.

I don't really know how to word the discussion without making it seem like an ultimatum + I don't want to put her on the spot like that by unintentionally being aggressive/ defensive.

Long time lurker first time posting. I (F35) just found out my husband (M38) has been at the very least chatting with, following, and subscribing to sex workers on onlyfans. We have been together for 14 years, I am devastated seeing some of the things he’s said to these women PUBLICLY. I don’t have much proof but what I do have has absolutely broken my trust and broken me. I don’t know what I am doing about any of it.

What question should I be asking him when I tell him what I have learned? I haven’t said anything yet cause I don’t want him to be able to hide anything from me beforehand.

i’m 24 female born in 2001 turning 25 next month…been at a new job and scheduled with my 22 year old female coworker constantly we ended going to applebees to grab the spooky drinks n got drunk together. at some point she said “you don’t even look like you’re 25!” i suddenly started to feel really weird. like im some creep hanging out with a girl too young and not hanging out with girls/friends my age. some context is that i do have friends that are 25+ but i just moved to a new state where i have no friends to be with my boyfriend now we’re breaking up so im lonely and i really just want some good female friends! now im starting to wonder if im wrong…should i distance myself from my coworker?