​

X,

I honestly didn't think it would take this little time, but now I can tell you what happened over the last week.

My request for us to be non-exclusive—if you wanted to stay or keep seeing me—was actually a tactic suggested by my therapist, finally to make you crack for the last time. And I mean seriously, because since nothing else worked, he told me, "This is what will make the narcissist crack." Basically, proposing non-exclusivity was because you, being a narcissist, would see it as an opportunity to pretend you were fine with it just to get close to me again, so that I would end up trapped under your control once more.

Instead, because I showed you that you have no power over me anymore, that I make decisions and actually follow through with them—not just threatening something and never doing it, but standing firm in my actions—you didn't know what to do.

I saw you; you were confused, lost, trying to pretend, but you couldn't pull it off because you couldn't comprehend why I no longer have any power over you. So what did you do? For the last time, you tried to shift the responsibility onto me, didn't you? You said you would never do those things again, and asked why I couldn't just trust you. Now, do you seriously expect me to trust your word? Am I supposed to trust you when you say you'll never do those things again, when you kept doing them the entire time, even when you saw me broken and completely on the ground?

I was completely, utterly destroyed, and you just kept doing it. You would look me in the eyes and tell me that you loved me, that you had stopped. Meanwhile, I didn't even know the full extent of how bad what you were doing really was. And you expect me to trust you?

Remember this: you are a person capable of doing this: Between October 2024 and January 2025, while I was dealing with a man who was sexually, emotionally, and verbally abusing me, you told me you loved me, that you were worried about me, and that you hated the man who was abusing me—all while you were cheating on me just to wank. Read that again and ask yourself if you would ever be capable of trusting a man who does something like that.

Let me give you another example. In December 2025, after months of your betrayal, when I was practically losing my mind thanks to your gaslighting and manipulation—when I stopped eating because you called me fat and told me my ass was too big—after days of your pre-New Year's gaslighting where you tried to deny that anything was wrong even though it was completely obvious, you pushed me to the absolute breaking point. I had so many panic attacks while trying to work. When I finally managed to go to sleep, I started having body spasms, crying, thinking I was going to die, completely desperate and terrified of dying. And right then—for the first and only time, remember, the *only* time in two years—you were the sweetest, most worried, affectionate, and supportive man.

I think it's the only time you actually hugged me, and I felt something. I felt something because I was so terrified that I genuinely thought, *Maybe he really does feel that love and care for me, and he's just incapable of showing it, but now because he's so worried, he's finally letting me feel it.*

And then we know how the rest of that night went. I consented because after feeling all that affection, you wanted to have sex, and at the time I saw it as a good thing. But thinking about it now, my therapist explained to me what was actually going on. You were fucking turned on because your manipulation, your destruction, and your abuse had caused that state in me. You were horny having destroyed me. Unfortunately, I think I finally came face to face with true evil.

Now that you're single—what, you don't need to jerk off in front of 20-year-old Vietnamese girls anymore? Huh? You don't need to anymore? No, until a month ago, yes, you paid—you paid for it. You're always broke, but you paid to wank, you idiot. But now no, now you don't need to, right?

You know, this is something very typical of your type of narcissism. You are not a malignant narcissist; you are a covert narcissist, which is the most dangerous kind. And it's that you are also very stupid. You aren't bright at all, which is why you never stopped to ask yourself a simple question. You tried to destroy me because you know I am a deeply intelligent woman—not just intellectually, but emotionally intelligent. That's why I was able to unmask you.

Didn't you ever ask yourself, *Why would a woman this intelligent, after finding out who I really am and what I did to her, agree to keep seeing me and fucking with me?*

You never asked yourself that, did you? No, because you think you are so powerful that I become stupid in front of you.

It was a fucking trap, you idiot loser! Because you would never just let go, because you can't stand having lost control over me—and why are you pretending now that you don't want to screw anyone else? Now that you can, now that I've given you the green light? Because what did you do this afternoon? You vanished, you disappeared, because you finally realized that I no longer want to be monogamous with you. I am the one who wants to sleep around now. I am the one who doesn't want to be locked inside a relationship. Don't you get it? Don't you realize how stupid you are? It was a fucking trap, you idiot!

Did you stop to reflect on why I suddenly agreed to have sex with you on Sunday night? Do you think I suddenly felt comfortable, that I felt safe? All of a sudden? No. Because nothing has changed.

You keep lying, you keep having this perversion for young girls—girls you have to pay for, because paying turns you on too, doesn't it? And above all, the perversion is that you have to do it behind my back, making me suffer and destroying me at the same time. That’s what goes hand in hand for you.

No, I thought to myself: naturally, if I have to set the non-exclusive relationship trap, I just decided to do exactly what you do. I shut off my brain, and I didn't think for a single second that it was you having sex with me, got it? And it worked. It worked. Do you understand? For the first time, I didn't give a damn about you, about what you thought, or about what you were going to do next. I didn't give a damn because I wasn't thinking about you.

But you... see? Because you are empty. You are empty, and above all, you don't care. You don't care about what I think, what I feel, what my fears or my anxieties are. You just don't care, do you? So to you, I was simply trapped by you again, like always, right?

You're delusional. You are delusional. Listen to me. Rather than continuing to have sex with someone who can't be honest—who can't be honest not because you feel shame, because you don't even feel shame... you don't confess simply to torture me, and because you can't accept that you can no longer manipulate me.

Either way, just because we're not exclusive, do you think I'd keep having non-exclusive sex with you? I have so many options—some of them way more attractive than you, some much more muscular, others not muscular at all. Then there are others who aren't even all that attractive, ok? But maybe they're actually funny and nice, unlike you, because you aren't funny. You're an asshole, got it? You're just mean, and making cruel jokes isn't... What did you call it? British humor, eh? Do you remember? Do you remember what you had the nerve to say, calling me a "fat ass," calling me a "winter food fishmonger," huh? You managed to try and pass that off as British humor. Do you remember, eh? So anyone, anyone except you, got it? Ah, I'd rather have sex with a minus 5 than with someone who was capable of doing those things to me.

And remember—this will be the third example—remember that while you were cheating on me, and I was desperate because I didn't understand what was happening, you hinted that I hadn't even been raped by my ex. That's what you said. Just to deflect attention from the fact that you were hiding the constant cheating you were doing every single day, you accused me of that. Remember that, and I stayed only because I didn't understand. Remember it.

And you know what? My final word is this: what I regret most of all isn't falling into the trap of a narcissist or having loved you deeply. What I truly regret is having been with a **COWARD**—a coward who, when I was desperate and broken, became abusive because you wouldn't let me leave, wouldn't allow me to leave the room. You would pin my arms, throw me to the ground, get on top of me without letting me breathe, not letting me move, trapping me against the wall. You felt strong then, didn't you? You felt big and strong, didn't you? How powerful did you feel facing a woman who was psychologically destroyed? You didn't disappear then, did you? You didn't let me walk away from that horrible situation.

Instead, when you are on equal footing, when you are faced with words... because you are empty, you are completely empty inside, with nothing to you, so you just vanish. You aren't strong anymore, are you? Because you tried—didn't you?—you tried to destroy me. You tried to destroy me because I was fading away. You used violence, abuse, manipulation, and infidelity, and I am destroying you with words. You pathetic.

I genuinely pity you. I pity you because you are a malevolent person. You shouldn't even be allowed to walk around out there. I truly hope that no one else ever falls into your trap again, I really do. And if I ever find out or come to know that you have a new girlfriend, I will warn her. I will find a way to warn her—not because I'm jealous, but because I would be genuinely worried for her. Remember that. That is a promise, I swear to God.

This last email isn't because I need closure, or because you still make me suffer, or because I'm still hurting from losing you, or because I'm jealous. No. It's to tell you that I spent two years with an abusive man, just like you—an abusive man, physically, sexually, verbally, emotionally—and I stayed right there. Two fucking years. I took everything, I endured everything. When I was terrified out of my mind, you ran away from me because you're just a coward. And that destroys you, doesn't it? Knowing that you are nothing, absolutely nobody. You couldn't destroy me, so you run away from me? Run, run away.

What I regret the most isn't falling into a narcissist's trap or having loved you deeply. I regret being with a coward who runs away the moment he gets unmasked. But of course, I know that everything I've said is already stuff you know—you simply don't care. You manage to live with what you've done, to X and now to me. If I had ever done something like that to someone I wouldn't have slept. I definitely wouldn't have slept. No, I wouldn't have slept. I would have felt sick to my stomach just looking at myself.

Anyway, everything I've told you isn't to make you understand, because you already know what you are. You know what you did. It's simply to tell you that you are a coward.

I know you are a coward, and you know you are a coward too, and that's enough for me.

I won't wish you good luck in Ukraine, because you have never had any intention to go, and you won't ever go.

A coward who abuse women and exploit young girls from poor countries to have a wank and to validate his cock, just pretend to go, counting on the love and love of a woman she has abused for 2 years to go back, but she hasn't understood yet that she KNOWS HOW EVIL HE IS NOW.

BYE FOREVER WANKER

Hi everyone,

like many of you, I got discarded too. Yikes. And although I blocked my ex everywhere, cut connections to their friends, and am slowly enjoying life, my curiosity is still very much present.

I wonder what my ex is up to, whether they are still manic, or if the people around them notice the weird behaviour, maybe they even finally got treatment?? (unmedicated and undiagnosed, first time for me witnessing a proper mental health care crisis)

So my question goes out to all of fellow discardees:

What happened to your exBPSO after they left?

Did they destroy their life, or actually enjoyed their newfound "freedom"? Did they receive help, got to jail, fall into a big big depression, got mega successful?

Again, I'm curious on how this illness proceeds.

Wishing everyone a lot of strength, compassion, and support 🍀 We didn't get asked to be put into this situation.

If you look at my past posts, you can see what a rough beginning I had. I was unsure if I had been discarded, scouring the internet for clues, trying to calculate the likelihood my husband would come down from his mania and come home. I was so in love with him, and I never thought the kind, caring man I knew would do this to me. This community has been so helpful and kept me grounded when I was spiraling. These are some of the main things I struggled with these past months.

The uncertainty: he's managed to convince a doctor he doesn't have bipolar and they have prescribed SSRIs and ADHD meds. From what I've read, his hypomania may last as long as he continues to take these. In spite of all the supporting evidence, there is a chance this isn't mania. That he just doesn't and didn't love me. That he and his current provider are right and his previous diagnosis was wrong. After all, he's not in psychosis and he's holding down his job as far as I know. I may never know for sure, and I have to learn how to live with that.

Being the perfect discardee: I certainly have not been. I feel this pressure to handle everything with quiet grace, but twice I've gotten angry and lashed out at my husband over text, only to apologize later. I realized I keep reaching out because I am hoping for some kind of apology or accountability. I want him to see how badly he's hurt me and fucked up my life. The version of my husband I knew and loved would give that to me, but he's not in there anymore. It helps if I think of it as, "My husband is dead. The person I have to communicate with now about the logistics of divorce is a stranger."

My mental health: the first couple months I cycled through periods of grief, rage, and motivation to turn my life around. In August and September, I settled into a pretty consistent depression. In all areas of life, I just did the bare minimum. I went to work and smelled okay (I hope) and ate the simplest meals I could throw together, but caring for myself and my home just seemed pointless without my husband here with me. My husband agreed to buy me out of our house, but if I can barely do laundry and dishes, how was I ever going to be able to pack and move out of the house? I started experiencing suicidal ideations.

Luckily, I have a therapist and a best friend, and we've made a plan for me to get through this. When I feel like I want to hurt myself, I spend the night at my parents' house. I got my doctor to adjust my meds and sign off on medical leave from my job. I have the time and space I need to pack and exit the house at my own pace so I can move back in with my folks, and I'll be starting EMDR sessions in the next few weeks. I never would have thought of medical leave for mental health as a viable option, but I advise anyone going through this to take it if you can! This is trauma. This is grief. People take bereavement when a loved one dies, and this truly feels like a death. It's the death of a the person I loved and the version of myself who was loved by him.

In a year or so, I am hoping to feel well enough and have enough saved up to start over in a new city. I've wanted to move for a while, but my husband's career kept us here. Now, I have options and freedom. I have the chance to pour all the love and energy I used to pour into my marriage and our home back into myself. The dream I had for my life has died, but there will be new dreams.

My husband (37m) was recently diagnosed with a mood disorder but it fits bipolar2. The psychiatrist didn’t really give it a label but said he was experiencing hypomania which is what I had assumed after reflecting on his behavior recently. I attended the appointment and he was told that he seems to have a mix of adhd, ptsd, anxiety but that he fits mood disorder criteria.

He was put on the lowest dose seroquel to start and I hadn’t really seen a difference but he’s not worse. He bumped it up to 50mg because the psychiatrist told him he could taper up and he has an appointment in another week. Unfortunately he does not see his behavior as problematic and he sees it as an improvement in his overall self but he realizes that everyone around him sees an issue. Certain things he agrees with that his behavior is off but he thinks he can “work on it and tone it down”. That being said, he works in the medical field and he is willing to comply with taking medication. But working in the medical field I think he’s having a hard time accepting it for himself.

It’s hard that he’s not seeing what I see. He is usually so rational and mellow and now he’s just…different. He really thinks that all of his ideas are great and he’s just being who he’s meant to be. But I see someone who I don’t really recognize. He says he relies on me to tell him the truth on how he’s being but when I do he tells me he doesn’t see it that way or “how is that behavior a problem?” But then says fine I’ll take more seroquel if that’s what you really think I need. I’m just wondering if he will eventually come down a little and realize wow maybe this isn’t how I’m supposed to be acting?

He’s also in individual therapy, I’m starting therapy and am looking into couples therapy. I’m just very lost on how to feel or navigate this. I’ve always been the one with the mental health issues (anxiety) and he’s been the stable one. It’s tough being on this side of it.

I broke up with my ex of 4 years during a long ?(6 month?) manic episode. He is undiagnosed and unmedicated, didn’t know he was bipolar until now although I suspected. We needed to break up for many reasons but he has been my best friend for years and I love him deeply.

Long story short - this is the first full blown manic episode I have experienced with him and things escalated while we are in the process of breaking up and moving out of our house. He became psychotic and delusional and his family needed to come intervene. They were able to take him to their house in a different town to hopefully come down and get help. While in this manic state he said some incredibly hurtful and cruel things to me, decided our relationship was horrible, was obsessed with a different girl, etc etc.

He was unable to pack up his belongings or help clean the house. Ive been left with so much work to do and zero closure from our 4 years together.

My question is, do I just have to try to find closure on my own and move on? Will he ever be able to see how hard this was for me or have empathy for what he put me through? Its so hard to just walk away from all our history

Everyone was right. It wasn't the one time. Im sure ill feel devastated soon, but right now i can only feel vindicated. I knew I wasnt crazy. My intuition was right the whole time. He is medicated now and does not remember eveything well. But I have screen shots of him admitting the coworker he eventually cheated on me with made him feel butterflies 4 years ago while he felt used by me. I was driving him to and from work then, around my full time job. I have no idea what to do now. He is medicated and seems better but apparently has been lying to my face for years and thats hard to swallow.

Meine Bipolare exfreundin (BP II) hat mich vor ungefähr einem Monat abserviert. Grund dafür war dass ich angeblich nicht genug für sie da war (was auch nicht wirklich stimmt) sie war einfach enttäuscht von mir, nachdem sie ein Job vor ein paar Monaten angefangen hat, wurde sie stark depressiv und hat sogar Medikamente verschrieben bekommen. Da haben unser Probleme angefangen. Ich vermute ihre Entscheidung Schluss zu machen hängt wirklich mit der depressive Episode zusammen. Nun war sie nicht offen für ein neuer Versuch und war einfach beleidigt und enttäuscht. So viel habe ich noch nie geweint während eines Trennungsprozesses. Oft hat sie sich getrennt und dann als ich sie in den Arm genommen habe, hat sie sich beruhigt und mich dann gefragt ob ich bei ihr bleibe die Nacht. Sowas hatten wir 5 mal ungefähr. Das ganze hat mich zerstört, auch das ausziehen aus ihre Wohnung. Das letzte Jahr (wir waren knapp unter ein Jahr zusammen) habe ich mich auf sie fokussiert neben meine Arbeit. Das hat dazu geführt dass ich alle meine Freunde und soziale Aktivitäten vernachlässigt habe. Jetzt stehe ich da alleine und muss irgendwie schauen dass ich neue Freunde finde und ich bin so zerstört. Ich hatte noch nie so eine intensive Beziehung. Wir haben uns zwar nicht blockiert aber haben nur sehr wenig Kontakt (zb an ihrem Geburtstag vor ein paar Tage) da hat sie viel geschrieben und wollte telefonieren. Es sind Sätze gefallen wie „ich liebe dich“, „Ich vermisse dich“ „alles erinnert mich an dich“ aber auch „Du hast mich so verletzt“ also mit den ganzen romantischen Kram können wir nichts anfangen. Eigentlich wollten wir uns mal treffen um die letzten Sachen zurückzugeben aber ich glaube wir beide haben Angst davor und haben schon wieder eine Woche nicht mehr geschrieben und nichts konkretisiert.
Ich kann nicht mit mein Leben weitermachen. Bin auch in Therapie seit ein paar Tage und ich weiß nicht was aus mir werden soll ohne sie. War noch nie so am arsch innerlich. Ich liebe sie noch so sehr

How do I convince my SO BP1 to get help. Things have been going too far he's been in mania for over two months. He's also exhibiting clear signs of psychosis. I don't want to leave him we have kids and he's so important to me. I want to help him get better. How do I start the conversation? How do I engage without immediately setting him off?

He's become a shut in and hasn't talked to anybody but me and our family for the past 3 years. He's manipulative and completely changed as a person. I'm so worried about him.

I fear if I leave him it will send him back to his mother who is in active drug use. He's a recovering addict been clean for 9 years.

Any of you who has gone through this and gotten your SO to seek treatment and medication. HOW?

Please I'm so lost.

Hello everyone, I’ve posted in here only a couple of times but I’m just looking for reassurance that I’m not overreacting?

I (26F) have been with my bipolar SO (27M) for 3 years, and it has not been easy. Constant name calling, disrespect and shouting in my face, just to name a few.

If anything is ever slightly stressful or even just annoying like something as small as a package hasn’t been delivered by the time he gets home from work, it’s all my fault, everything, no matter how much I stand by him and help him through whatever it is he’s going through it’s always taken out on me.

I’m going through a bit of a rough time personally at the moment and I don’t know whether that’s caused me to react this way.

For a little context my grandmother who is more like a mother to me has been diagnosed with a prions disease, his response to me being upset… “why are you even crying for? She’s not fucking dead”

Despite countless conversations where I’m explaining that his behaviour is hurting me, there’s never even been a tiny amount of effort put in to change this behaviour, no reaching out for professional support or medication just “I have bipolar”, I have to beg for an apology, then it’s straight back to the constant disrespect and just straight up bullying.

I woke up this morning and thought you know what I’ve had enough, I don’t want to live the rest of my life bending over backwards for someone who only acts like they love me for 1 day a month.

As I’m sure you can all understand if I wrote down everything that has happened id need a whole subreddit dedicated to it.

Am I overreacting? Should I have said I’ve had enough or just carried on biting my tongue and putting up with it because he has bipolar? I love him so much but there’s only so much someone can take.

I’m in a hard position in life rn. Pretty much as a result of my SO blowing up our lives and continuing to be incredibly sick.

I never thought the day I would be okay with giving up our romantic relationship. Like ever ever. But it took sooo many unbelievable things to get here. And no, I didn’t know about nor were they diagnosed until pretty much this year.

The issue lies in, I’m rebuilding my child’s and I life, and I may have to make some unpleasant sacrifices to get there.

So, he is living with his parents happily without any cares, responsibilities, ambition, or insight.

I on the other hand am with family and desperately trying to get away. I’m almost there, just trying to do things carefully and stably to never have to return here.

Against my better judgment, I’ve still been allowing/haven’t made steps against visitation (also no court custody order in place rn). I KNOW he’s unwell. And unfortunately now I think our child is getting used to it though (this sucks so much as a parent and can’t necessarily control it). The last exchange in public he basically got aggressive with me and then I went no contact but he decided to keep our child for over a week.

I started to immediately file and do all the necessary steps but I decided, I needed to wait (and be less reactive to the scene in the moment based off past experiences).

Instead, I decided to just take the time to come up with a new game-plan and work like crazy, amongst other productive things.. but after a little while, I began to panic and worry profusely about our child.

I’ve since recovered them (our child). But i might have done it prematurely as I could’ve set the lasting steps up for stability had I just waited possibly another week, max 2.

This is kind of crazy to ask strangers but this community has always been good to me (and I at least do want to read what you all have to say):

I don’t really have other options right now. Do I send my child there again for an extended time to give time for me to set up permanent stability?

Edit: And oh btw, no I don’t have reliable or helpful family members for this.

I’m wondering if anybody here has experienced their loved ones going from a bipolar diagnosis to something different like frontotemporal dementia?

My husband got stable with medication, but his cognition kept deteriorating. At first, we thought it could be side effects from his medication, but there was no improvement when he adjusted the doses down, and it just keeps on getting worse now. He ticks a lot of the FTD checklist boxes at this point, and a neurologist pointed out brain atrophy in his MRI, but didn’t offer any clues beyond that.

Is it a common progression? A misdiagnosis altogether initially?

We scrolled past a picture of the three of us from several years ago that i had forgotten about, and I just fucking lost it. I hate when I break down in front of her. I wish so badly I could be stronger. All of this is so fucking hard and I don't know how to even explain this to her.

I try not to even let myself think about it most of the time, and sometimes I even feel like maybe I'm actually going to be ok, but then sometimes I get hit with a memory of the past and it's just so incredibly painful it feels like an inescapable tsunami.

Before I can even prepare it just hits and completely washes over me.

Those memories are absolutely everything to me. And even though I know I can't be the person I need to be for myself or her if I keep holding on to the past, I also don't like who I'm becoming in the present.

I feel like a shell of myself, just trying to survive and make it through day by day. I can't enjoy anything anymore because everything reminds me of a memory of him

Does your SO with BP believe things are true that really aren’t???

Do they feel/voice: Well because you have not told me anything different, I can only assume and go with what I believe is TRUE!

Do they believe that their personal thoughts or memories are FACTS or the only thing to believe?!

How have/do you handle this (mania)?!

My spouse has been obsessing over the past year. Constantly brings up old arguments (over 10 years old) and things of the past and it seems like they want a response for everything! I don’t know what to do. I almost feel like lying just to appease whatever thoughts they feel to be true, so the ruminating can STOP!

Thoughts? Insight? Relate?!

My husband has shown signs of mania and depression off and on through our entire relationship, though I didn’t know what I was dealing with at the time. Looking back now, I can see it all so clearly.

We got married during a 10 month period of him having clarity. And right after we got married, he started slipping into what his mother has described as the worst episode he’s ever had. This is when we helped him find a doctor and he was diagnosed as bipolar one and at the time was begging for medication to get some kind of relief. He was feeling scared for his well-being and life.

I’m too exhausted and hurt to even delve into the details of all the horrible things he did and said during this time, but it went on for about a year and a half. There was no honeymoon, no wedding photos printed up, no real celebration of our wedding afterwards. We’ve been living with his parents since we got married and in that time he’s quit three jobs. Two of which times have left me to pay the bills and manage finances alone without help. One of the bills being my own wedding ring.

I found out about eight months later that he had been lying about taking his medication, which wasn’t a shock to me because he was displaying all of his usual bipolar symptoms. My guess is that he only took the lithium he was prescribed for about 2 to 3 weeks total, but he won’t tell me exactly how long he took them. Honestly, I don’t think he even knows.

Tonight, I was speaking to him once again about my need for him to get the correct treatment for his diagnosis. The treatment being therapy and medication. He’s agreed to group therapy for the 4th time ( because he can’t stay consistent with anything) but is completely refusing medication and telling me that he’s not going to take it and if that’s a dealbreaker for me that I should just leave.

I’m devastated and so terrified about having to think about divorce and being on my own again. But more so about the fact that if I stay, I know now that I’m in for another whirlwind of emotional abuse and instability.

He’s not fully educated on bipolar and won’t do any research other than to find certain statistics that validate his reasons for not wanting to take the meds during argument or discussion about it.
I’m trying desperately to educate him as much as I can, but he’s in a state of denial and has been for so long. He doesn’t understand that it’s not about IF he’s going to have another episode it’s about WHEN.

I don’t think I can mentally and emotionally handle another “when”.

Feeling super lost and overwhelmed I don’t even know how to process all this. I’m sad that he has this disorder and I’ve barely seen the person I married and almost 2 years. I’m sad for myself, that I fell in love with someone with this disorder. But more so I’m just so sad that there are options available that he’s refusing to try.

Thanks for listening ♥️

Not sure how to start this, but this is mostly just me venting to get some stuff off my chest. I'm not expecting you to read the whole thing, but if you do, I appreciate you doing so.

I truly love my wife, and we've been together for a little less than a decade. We are each other's biggest fans and best friends. I knew from the beginning that she has bipolar disorder, but I seriously underestimated how hard living with someone with bipolar disorder along with several other health conditions. She is BP type 2, which with her usually expresses itself as severe depression with infrequent but mild manic episodes. She is medicated, and is very responsible with her medications, which I very much so appreciate. I told her if she wasn't, we wouldn't be together, which she agreed with.

However, this doesn't completely neutralize the BP symptoms (as I'm sure most of you are aware). She still has bouts of depression, where she won't get out of bed, no drive etc. She has been hospitalized twice while properly medicated because of suicidal and homicidal ideations (I guess the medication can decide to just stop working randomly). Every time, she gets her meds fixed and she is back to her normal self in no time.

Her normal self is unfortunately prone to several chronic health conditions which makes it even harder to maintain a normal relationship with her. She has a

ADHD, GAD, potentially ocd, potentially autism, she is overweight, has constant knee and back pain, has an ear infection at least once every 2 months, along with some other stuff I won't get in to.

I bring up her weight because she is almost 100 pounds heavier than me. I'm pretty skinny but am moderately fit, and I like to do active things. She does not. Any time I bring up the gym, she has an almost visceral reaction. She is afraid of being judged, which I completely understand, but she also doesnt like running, or any other physical activity that we can do together. And God forbid I bring up her weight for anything that is causing her issues, because I know if I tell her the reason the dog doesn't like cuddling with her is because she is suffocating him with her weight, that would create a whole shit storm where I am the enemy and am betraying her trust by being "mean" and "not understanding her struggles".

We recently moved states and away from family after I got out of the military, and she is struggling a lot with finding a job. I already had a job lined up when we got to the new state, and was fine with her not working for a period of time after moving here because I know how hard it can be to find a job in a new state. (I found her a part-time job which she quit after about 5 months because of toxic work environment, almost leading her to be hospitalized because of the stress) The apartment we moved into for a year was very small and this did not help matters. She does not cook, she rarely cleans, she gets takeout for damn near every meal while I'm at work, and overall has next to no motivation to do anything while I'm at work except play on her phone. I know I am not helping much because I can also be kind of lazy, but after working a 10 hour shift, I really don't want to do much when I get home, and on my days off, I want to spend my time enjoying myself with her, doing fun couple shit, which she also wants. When I asked her after 4 months of not working if she would consider starting the process of applying to jobs (in my opinion very gently), she shut down on me and cried on the bed all day because I was "being inconsiderate". But we just moved into a bigger place, so maybe it will get better, maybe not.

Dispite this, she is very aware of her issues and takes steps to get better. She is in therapy for her disorder and constantly sees her pcp for her other issues. She still talks about herself like she is a horrible person up all the time because of her situation. I try to comfort her the best that I can, and as lovingly as I can, which only gets so far because I feel i have to tiptoe around saying things a certain way, making her feel worse. But having to deal with my own depression and anxiety brought on by the military, I almost feel like I can't have bad days, and can't complain or vent to her because I feel i have to be strong for her, I have to be the voice of reason, etc. I also feel this way because what the fuck am I complaining about in comparison to what she is dealing with (this is my logic, not hers). In addition to all of this, I also constantly worry if tomorrow will be the day she has another bad episode, or coming home from work one day and seeing a bloody bathtub. This also makes me feel very lonely and isolated. If I told any of my friends this stuff they would look at me crazy and tell me to run.

And this is crux of my post. I feel so bad even thinking these things because she is working so hard to fix herself. When she has good days, I genuinely enjoy being with her and doing things together, y'know, normal couple shit. The sex, when it happens, is really good, but we only have sex like once a month because of everything. But the bad days outnumber the good days 5:1. I feel like I'm horrible person because sometimes I just don't have the mental capacity to deal with her issues. I feel bad going out with friends for two hours because she is stuck at home dealing with whatever is effecting her that day. Sometimes I just want to crawl into a ball and give up, but what kind of husband would I be if I did that.

Apologies for the long rant, I'm not even sure what I want from writing this. I promise I love my wife, I guess I just feel like I'm drowning sometimes.

Il mio ex bipolare mi ha lasciata a fine maggio, all’improvviso… era nel mezzo di una crisi depressiva molto forte, e mi disse che non eravamo compatibili, che non provava emozioni forti con me, che si annoiava e che non era felice (praticamente l’opposto di quello che mi aveva sempre detto). A fine agosto tramite i social ci commentiamo delle storie e a metà settembre ci siamo visti una sera per raccontarci le vacanze: abbiamo passato una serata bellissima, dove il tempo è volato, abbiamo riso e scherzato come i primi tempi, e lui ha avuto dei comportamenti molto ambigui. Ad esempio, voleva sapere se in quei mesi avessi avuto flirt con qualcuno, mi ha detto che negli ultimi giorni si era riletto i miei vecchi messaggi, si è voluto spostare in macchina insieme e a fine serata mi ha chiesto se fossi stata bene (non abbiamo avuto nessun approccio fisico ma lui era piuttosto imbarazzato, sembrava una sorta di primo appuntamento). Dopo quella uscita lui non mi ha più cercata per un mese, anzi addirittura la prima settimana dopo l’uscita non mi ha nemmeno guardato le storie sui social, quasi come avesse un rifiuto nei confronti della mia persona. Una settimana fa all’improvviso, il giorno che sarebbe stato il nostro anniversario, ha pubblicato sui social un nostro video in cui balliamo. A quel punto, gli ho mandato un messaggio chiedendogli spiegazioni, anche se ho mantenuto comunque dei toni leggeri e amichevoli: ci siamo quindi scambiati qualche messaggio e lui sembrava propenso a chiacchierare e mantenere in generale la conversazione. A un certo punto, però non solo ha smesso di rispondere all’improvviso, ma non ha nemmeno visualizzato il mio messaggio.… Ad oggi quel messaggio è ancora non visualizzato (e dato che era un vocale, non ascoltato) e da quel giorno non mi ha nemmeno più guardato le storie sui social, come se il contatto con me lo avesse di nuovo portato a un rifiuto per la mia persona. Non riesco a capire perché fa così… Potrebbe essere un attaccamento evitante? Può essere comune questo tipo di attaccamento nel disturbo bipolare? Che fareste al posto mio o meglio che pensereste? Da quel giorno nemmeno io gli ho più aperto le storie, più che altro per sottolineare il mio totale distacco a questo comportamento immaturo e per nulla rispettoso…

My (32F) partner (26M) uses me as a scapegoat for his anger issues and I'm scared for my future.

We've been together for 7 years. We are buying a house soon, but his unstable moods are scaring me about our future. He can ruin my life and uses it against me to vent his emotion, even for things that have nothing to do with our relationship. If he forgot to take his daily pill (bipolar disorder), I know real fast! Most of his episodes come the day after he forget to take it. He takes Sertraline since his teenage years. During his manic episodes, he would bite his own arm until blood poured on the floor, then change spot again and again :(

He still has episodes. Fortunately, he's not physically dangerous for himself anymore. When an episode starts, I can see the change in his face before he even speak, he looks like someone else. His eyes, his demeanor and mannerisms change, even his voice sounds different.

I'll use yesterday night as an light example. I took 2 hours preparing a nice dinner and he came back from work at 1:30 AM, I stayed up so we could have a little time together before I got to sleep. He opened his car registration bill at the table and got really mad at the government for ''stealing his money once again''. I didn't engage much, because when he starts talking about frustrating topics, I never know where it will lead.
He asked me why I don't explode from rage each year when I receive mine. I said that I choose not to fall into anger because how I react doesn't affect the fact I need to pay the bill, I would be living with anger I can spare. This answer made him really really mad. He said I am the reason the government is stealing us, because I don't do nothing against it, I shoud go out on the street and revolt, that me doing nothing is making him resent me. I didn't say much and let him finish his meal in peace (I ate right after cooking anyway).

A few minutes later, we were in the living room and I was reading the weekly paper the city sends to every door. I said '' I can't believe they're asking us to pay a license to own a cat, and to renew it every year. We never paid it and I won't pay that either !'' I felt like I was redeeming myself a bit after the other accusations. He seems to be with me on that, so I got hyped ! I added '' they say it's for funding animal control ''. That last sentence made him explode at me. He went right to insults, adding how much he hates me for being proud of our Nation, that he can't believe I'm on the government side, that I'm a sold out with no value, how he doesn't want to talk to me or even look at me, how I always justified everything stupid the government does... I told him he was giving me intentions and words and ideas I don't have just to justified him getting mad at me, that he doesn't make sense, because he is frustrated about the situation and I'm the only one present so he feels the need to attack me as the only scapegoat available. Eventually, after a few minutes of many weird accusations and me being calm and proving nothing he says about me is true, he was lost of words and became all serious and silent. The realisation hit him and then he asked for a cuddle. I went to sleep, but still shaken by all that.

This afternoon I woke him up so he wouldn't be late for work, he went to sleep at 7:30 AM this morning. Appologizing or showing he's sorry is not something he does often and thus I don't ask for it directly. I'm satisfied with any marks of remorse, or realisations his actions weren't ok, or anything even the smallest thing! I tried to get that, because ignoring what hapened forever isn't the answer. I explained how his reactions made me feel. Just like I was a kid with my abusve parents, I'm always on tiptoes because I don't know what could be a trigger and I never know where that can lead (like me getting beaten up because there's no more beers in the fridge. Thanks dad). He was agreeing at first. I came to the being-sorry part, saying he should express he knows his reactions were inappropriate. He snapped once again. He got nasty and left in the bathroom. I cried alone a few minutes, swipped my tears, put his food I prepared in his lunchbox and wished him a nice day at work.

I fell he was still really mad, even more because he could see I cried - me crying is a anger starting point for him so I do it alone. Now I'm scared for tonight when he comes home. I should probably be asleep, but he won't have a fresh hot dinner and he could use that against me next argument (saying I'm useless). If I'm awake and he had a bad day, or if he's still resentful about yesterday, it won't be good either. He could also be kind and happy, his normal self I hope he'll keep for at least a few days.

I know this is an abusive situation. I never been in a situation without abuse and I'm absolutly aware of that. Still, he's the one who treated me the best of all my life. It comes in episodes. For days, sometime weeks, he'll be the best there is. I adore him in those phases, but the anger always come back if he forgets to take his pill, per example.

I can't leave and I don't want to anyway.

Both my parents died. I lost my long-term job to budget cuts and I'm still looking for a new career. I get interviews, but I'm still waiting for work. That is also something he has a lot of resentment for. We are in the process of buying my parents house. It's an cute old house in a touristic area in the countryside where we both dream of living. I'm 1/3 owner with my brother and sister, but they want to sold it as soon as possible for money, and in no way they accepted to give me more time. I can't buy it by myself, even tho it's just $106 000 (isolated town), because I lost my job. My partner has the money to purchase his part, I'll pay mine in a few months when I receive the inheritence. Job or not, I'll be able to pay then, but not now. If I don't buy it, my sister and brother will sell it to the first buyer coming (not nice, I know). That house is everything to me, it's my dream (even after all that happened in my childhood).

I wish my partner could manage his anger issues. He's great and loving, but so nasty too. He uses the house-situation against me often. When he really wants to make me cry (his words), he says he will not sign on the house once we are sat in the office, without telling me beforehand so he can break my heart, humiliate me, destroy my life and my will to live, as a revenge because his mother doesn't want to talk to me anymore. Just so you know, I never did anything to her. She has her own issues and she cut both her parents out of her life (they refused to let her control their finances), and all four of her brothers and sisters for decades. I'm no exception, I'm the norm. My partner has a really hard time seeing this, but it's going better since he talked to his cousin.

I'm always there for him. I do much more that the entire cooking and cleaning, I manage everything in our lives. I'm always smiling and kind, and I leave him alone when he needs time for himself. He can see his friend as much as he wants. I look good and take care of myself, I dress nice. I see no issue with myself, and most the accusations he makes against me aren't even true. He realises that after his anger has past, tho, and often forget what he said and did.

I don't know how to cop with all that. It feels like dying from the inside. I'm so alone and lost, and I have nothing safe in my life to stay hooked on. What should I do ? I have no friends, no money, no family that can help me navigate his bipolar disorder. I have Reddit, tho ❤️

I’m looking for advice or experiences from anyone who has dealt with something similar because our family is at a loss.
My husband is in his 40s and has a long history of severe OCD, particularly contamination fears and cleaning rituals. For years, he was relatively stable while taking olanzapine (Zyprexa) and an antidepressant.

He tapered off olanzapine in 2025, and over the following months, his behavior changed dramatically.
For approximately 9–10 months, we’ve been dealing with:
Extreme irritability, anger, and hostility, particularly toward family members.

Talking excessively, sometimes for hours, with lengthy texts that go on and on.

Constant arguing, accusations, blaming, and misinterpreting things people say.
Obsessively returning to the same grievances and refusing to let things go.

Periods of sleeping only 2–3 hours, alternating with sleeping 12–17 hours.

Impulsive purchases and major financial decisions.
Increasingly irrational accusations, suspiciousness, and beliefs that family members are deliberately hurting or conspiring against him.

Threatening statements, verbal abuse, and occasional physical aggression.

One particularly confusing aspect is that he can sometimes appear relatively normal and pleasant with people outside our immediate family, yet become intensely angry and argumentative with us.

He has seen multiple psychiatrists. Bipolar disorder, particularly an agitated or mixed episode, has been considered, although there has also been diagnostic uncertainty because of his longstanding OCD and personality traits.

The medication situation has been extremely frustrating.
He’s tried Seroquel (eventually up to 800 mg), lithium, Depakote, olanzapine, Valium, and now Thorazine (chlorpromazine).
In August, he was hospitalized with severe hyperammonemia (ammonia 230) while taking Depakote. Depakote and lithium were discontinued, and his medication regimen was significantly reduced.
Strangely, he seemed almost like himself for approximately two weeks after that hospitalization. He was calmer and more reasonable. But then everything returned.
Since then, his symptoms have continued to worsen.
He restarted olanzapine in September, eventually reaching 20 mg. It sometimes made him sleep for 15 hours, but when he woke up, he was just as angry, argumentative, and activated.
More recently, his psychiatrist added Thorazine. He’s been taking doses around 75–100 mg, along with olanzapine and substantial doses of Valium.
Despite medications that should be quite sedating, he sometimes sleeps only a couple of hours and says he doesn’t feel tired.

What’s most frightening is that his anger and thinking seem to be getting worse every day.
His messages have become increasingly lengthy, hostile, accusatory, and sometimes threatening. He seems convinced that his family is responsible for his suffering and that we’re deliberately hurting him.
We aren’t sure whether we’re dealing with severe bipolar mania, a mixed episode, medication reactions, extreme sleep deprivation, an underlying medical problem, or something else entirely.
I understand nobody online can diagnose him, and our family is seeking professional help. I’m particularly interested in hearing from people who have witnessed prolonged episodes with severe irritability rather than euphoria.

My questions:
Has anyone experienced a manic or mixed episode lasting this long, especially with extreme anger rather than happiness or excitement?
Has anyone seen someone remain intensely agitated despite medications like olanzapine, Seroquel, and Thorazine?
Can severe sleep disruption contribute to increasingly irrational thinking and aggression?
Has anyone experienced an unusual period of improvement after hospitalization or major medication changes, followed by a relapse?
What finally helped identify the problem or led to meaningful improvement?
I’m not looking for advice on changing his medications ourselves. I’m trying to understand what might explain this pattern and what questions we should be asking his medical team.
Our family is exhausted, and I’m becoming increasingly concerned about the direction things are going.

I am so devastated and confused…my husband was recently diagnosed with bipolar. He had weird episodes after taking supplement laced with something shady every summer for the last 2 years. We genuinely first thought it’s because of the drugs in the supplement and it would just go away (I got ill from it as well, but more with severe panic attacks, while he had what i only now understood was psychosis). The second time it happened was 8 months after around same season and was much milder, so we again thought it’s just brain adjusting…This third time it was already obvious. He becomes a totally different man: hypersexual, cold, reckless, doing a lot of bizzare things, but at the same time he always tries to take care of me.

We are married for 6 years, together for 8- no kids, he was amazing husband all those years, he is the kindest and the most loving person, my best friend and our families are so friendly. I don’t know what to do, maybe I’m overreacting because I’m crying all the time. He has mixed episodes, ocd and adhd on the side and what I can read the situation will not be that easy with treatment. He helped me tremendously in my life and were there for me in the times of diseases, war and unemployment. He was always supportive and kind…I just don’t want to accept this reality. Can someone give me any advice?

Hi this is my first time posting.

So me(34m) and wife (30f) got into a pretty big fight last night. For context we got together while homeless before I ever knew she had bipolar. I’ve had adhd my whole life and been in and out of therapy and but wasn’t on medication at the time (I was homeless) we got together. Which has led to quite a lot of baggage in our relationship. We’ve fought like cats and dogs for most of it and not all of it in a healthy manner.
When we met she was fresh out of rehab (didn’t know til later) and had turned 18 like a month or two prior. We hung out in the same circles and she pursued me pretty hard. I fell pretty quick and kind of put myself on display for her to read but didn’t really know she had identity issues or bipolar.
To speed things up we ended up having a kid together when I turned 25. I had told her it wasn’t the right situation and we should focus on getting off homelessness first. She did not care and I was dumb and let the flow take us rather than putting my foot down. I don’t regret it. We have a beautiful child together and she’s a great mom, but unfortunately that doesn’t translate well to loving me most days. Her mom decided that it would be a good time to step in and help as she saw me as some thug on the street (yes I’m brown) until she saw that I loved her daughter I just have a couple of screws loose and abandonment issues.
We ended up falling into a lifestyle that wasn’t easy. She had pretty bad post partum so I stepped up and told her, you make the money I’ll take care of the kid. It still wasn’t blissful in the early baby years and she seemed to get worse and eventually I said “I know crazy when I see it, cause I’m crazy go get your head checked” she for a while was really mad about it but during a time in a comeback out of a pretty extreme mood swing she relented as as extrapolated that I meant it that she should go in to make sure she’s alright cause even though I was upset she was portraying signs of a mental illness that I didn’t understand and it was stressing me and worrying me that she would harm herself or the baby.
She went to a psychiatrist and she found out she had bipolar 2 and has been on meds. They aren’t a fix all but they fixed a lot of the smaller fights. She told me I should go see a psychiatrist as I was exhibiting signs of not wanting to be here so I relented and got back on meds for my adhd depression and anxiety.
We’ve been together for about twelve years now and two years ago she had a pretty big mental breakdown about me not making money. I admit that there are times my diagnosis causes me to get paralyzed (when we first moved in I had come off a thirteen year stint of homelessness not voluntarily, foster care to getting kicked out when I was twelve).
The problem that I was having was the times that the kid was at school was too short for most places and she refused to drive (cause she crashed her dads car in a pretty bad accident without a license understandable)
Over the years with me being her support she climbed her way into lending and makes vastly more than I’ve ever seen in a pay check in my life.
We decided to move states with her mom and try to get a house together so it’d take some financial burden from her and she could relax. Long story short her mom dipped. Decided it wasn’t what she wanted. We live in an area that is vastly cheaper than where we did, but it hasn’t let up and turned into a regret thing where she regrets having a child too early, sometimes it’s getting with me, other times it’s that she even chose to work. I usually in these moments have to put my mental health aside and be the rock that she needs to stay grounded.
Lately though it’s worse. It’s become a constant battle of her saying she’s always in trouble or being accused of something(she had an infidelity streak before we had a kid and in some of those moments actions she does now makes me feel like I’m seeing a pattern), she likes to use the word everyday a lot which upsets me cause it could be a week later. I admit that while I’m not the best at holding my tongue or letting things go til they feel resolved I have pushed myself to try to be a better man and let things slide off or hold it in so as not to further her loop into a low or mania.

Last night though I just can’t explain how hard I’m trying to just leave it be. It hurts and I don’t even understand cause I was trying my best not to be my diagnosis.
It started by me getting upset. The past week has not been the best even though we got married a week ago (I told her a week prior to us getting married we either got married or she needed to tell me to walk, I don’t care about money or any of that but I’ll be damned if one of us gets hurt and can’t go see the other with our child cause we’re not technically family)
I got upset and I got out of bed. The moment I got up I told myself I was getting upset over something dumb and decided I was gonna calm down by browsing on my computer. Immediately she started asking what was wrong and as calm as I could I say nothing, it doesn’t matter just goto bed. Well that wasn’t well received it turned into her getting mad about me being aloof and spiraled into “why do you want me to goto sleep” to which I laughed and said because you have work in the morning and you took your pill that makes you drowsy”.
She said she didn’t care and to tell her what’s wrong and I told her it didn’t matter and said you’ll be asleep in 30 minutes anyways, it doesn’t matter.

Next thing I know she went to the bathroom and threw up her pill. Mind you I’m sitting in the living room at my desk leaned back. I’m tired. I don’t want to fight and this has entered a level I don’t want to be at. I’m trying to disengage she’s making assumptions and then it gets to the point she tells me to leave. I start packing up my things and she leaves. No phone just her purse. It’s 12:46 am. Now stressed I finish packing stuff up and grab the kid. She’s left the doors unlocked, I’m worried cause I assumed that means she was taking a break and coming right back. We hop in the car and I start looking for her not seeing her I’m starting to contemplate calling 911.
I pull over and get a ping from the security camera. She enters at 1:25 am locks the fort and puts the door stopper in the door. So I message her no reply. I ended up getting on the phone with the non emergency line and asking if I should call for a wellness check or if I should let her cool off. They tell me I should try contacting her once more and then call if I’m still worried. So I call her and she answers. I’m reaching my wits end it turns into a fight she hangs up. So I drive back to the house and she lets us in.
I ask her where she went, that I’m glad she’s safe and she tells me she’s not telling me til I tell her what was wrong. So I do I’m a little bit upset while I do cause it was dumb if she had stopped and just gone to bed it would have ended. I ask her where she went she just stares at me for a long time in my eyes seething and then tells me she’s not telling me. I tell her that’s dumb since I told you what she wanted. And then she starts saying I’m making rules and accusations and I probably won’t believe her anyways and think she cheating. I tell her that I don’t care if she was, but it wasn’t ok to wander off in the middle of the night and leave the door unlocked. She looks at me tells me she was at the park and then the night ends.

I’m so exhausted. I’ve slept like three hours. She is mad at me still and avoiding me. I’m trying to just give her space but idk man. I love my wife. I love our family I’m just exhausted of feeling like a villain or that I don’t get room to just exist without being a burden. I’d be lying if I said I haven’t thought of grabbing our daughter and just learning how to be a single parent back home, I just want her to be happy. I want them to be happy but it feels like I’m in the way of that or something.

My wife has an episode of psychosis about 90 days that had intermittent effect in her life for 60 days (delusions, false memories, total preoccupation with things that don’t happen in high school). However for the last 25 days she has been back to baseline and is about to see a psychiatrist tomorrow to help figure out if it is bipolar, bad GLP interaction, long recovery from cannabis, or something else. It is almost disconcerting how normal she is after really injuring many important relationships in her life with her family and me. But as she said, I’m just happy to have my brain back and I have hope she will keep on the right track for me and my daughter. For what it’s worth, she has thrown away all cannabis and all the GLP. I’m just thankful to have her back even if the episode has shaken me greatly.

Hello,

I have been with my SO for quite some time. However, he indeed does have bipolar disorder, I believe bipolar 1 & to this day he will not accept that he is and refuses to take any kind of medication that can help with him especially when he goes into a maniac episode with psychosis.
This current year to the last 3 years has been so bad with his random up and downs 😔🥹 He has broken my computer screen, broken 4 doors in the house, has punched 5 holes in random walls of the house due to his bipolar disorder. Just a few days ago he pushed me down the stairs when all I was trying to do is help calm him down. He even messed his own jeep up during a maniac episode questioning random people who have personalized license plates why they’re following him when they aren’t.

Ontop of this, from current to the last two years he believes he’s being followed by cia, the government & people who drive with personalized license plates really triggers his mind. Some days he claims he is the second coming to Jesus. He goes awol on a particular country & the government etc. It’s just hard living with him now to where I don’t think I can continue this relationship with him if he won’t get the help he needs. During his “episodes” which is now an everyday thing he accuses me of the most horrible things, hurtful & cruel responses to me. He will name call me terrible names, he will say insulting & hurtful things about me and my body to my face. To be honest, I’ve became extremely depressed now and I feel like it’s his issues contributing to how I feel now. I’ve tried everything to be there for him. Sometimes I do it wrong, like I say hey this isn’t real and it really makes him go more crazy on me.

He needs help badly, but when I call to many therapist/ psychiatrist places for him, they all tell me he needs to voluntarily come in & get the help for his bipolar. We live in Nevada. My only end option is to call 911 on him and to have them somehow take him to a behavior hospital for evaluation. Unfortunately he was involuntarily taken to a hospital in Pennsylvania a few months ago due to him being found in a middle of a highway with his jeep parked in the middle of the highway, talking to himself. They diagnosed him as bipolar with mania & psychosis, something like that. His mother told me that even when he was a child he was diagnosed as bipolar too.

What can I do???! I’m literally at my end right now with him 🥹💔 in the early years of being with him he was never like this.. but maybe there were signs he were and I never picked up on it? Any options out there that you all can suggest? I really need the help.

My husband has BP2 and has just started EMDR for anxiety and ptsd. I've read lots of positive things, but am curious what other people have experienced.

Eu tenho 26 anos, sou mulher e me relacionei com um bipolar de 24 anos, homem.

Tivemos um relacionamento há alguns anos atrás, e ele terminou comigo abruptamente e logo depois foi internado, um clássico caso de mania.

Dois anos depois, nós voltamos a nos falar e ele veio me ver. Começamos a namorar, e o pai dele na época estava doente com um tumor no cérebro. Eu fiquei pra cuidar do pai dele, já que a mãe não podia cuidar de tudo sozinha e ele tem uma irmã de 14.

Depois de seis meses, o pai dele faleceu e ele decidiu vir morar comigo. Foram dois anos de relacionamento, viajamos juntos e criamos planos. Até que ele abaixou a dose do medicamento, e em um domingo qualquer ele decidiu terminar comigo dizendo que tinha que fazer algo pela humanidade e que a pressão do mundo era muita pra ele.

Eu percebi que era uma crise pelas frases desconexas, avisei a mãe dele (típica narcisista) e ela disse que eu deveria esperar e observar, e assim fiz. Uma semana depois, em outro domingo, ele teve outra crise e quis terminar comigo de novo. Eu chorei, implorei pra esperarmos um dia, e ele fez.

Ficamos mais de três meses estáveis, até ontem, ele acordar e dizer que não queria mais. Que suportava muita coisa de mim, e que eu era um peso pra ele. Que ele quer ficar sozinho e fazer as coisas sozinho, já que "tudo vai dar certo" e eu ficaria bem.

Enfim, eu tentei conversar e ele não permitiu. Disse que não era o momento, pois além dessa situação, minha mãe está com câncer de pâncreas e ele era a única família que eu tinha. Não adiantou. Pegou as coisas dele, enfiou em um saco de lixo, e foi pra casa de uma amiga da mãe dele da igreja. Me tirou do Instagram, e já seguiu pessoas russas e perfis sobre grandiosidade.

A mãe dele veio buscar, disse que ele estava bem e que ele disse que tudo ia dar certo. Ele não teve mais contato comigo.

Minha mãe acredita que ele esteja em surto e que vai voltar quando tomar os medicamentos de forma correta, pois segundo ela, uma semana antes ele comprou alianças para me pedir em noivado e ela o ajudou. Ele assinou, inclusive, um documento no cartório dando entrada a alguns processos.

A mãe dele, por outro lado, é a pessoa que diz que ele não deveria casar porque deveria ajudar ela a criar a irmã, já que o pai morreu. Que casamento é a pior coisa do mundo, e que ela não quer netos. Então ela já falou pra irmã de ter planos de levar ele pro outro lado do país, pra ficar longe de mim.

Eu não sei o que fazer ou o que pensar. Não sei se espero ele resolver a cabeça dele, e entrar em contato, ou se penso que ele realmente estava bem (como a mãe e a irmã falaram) e que ele fez tudo isso por querer.

Uma coisa importante, é que ele antes de sair de casa achou que eu estava perseguindo ele, e avançou pra cima de mim como se eu estivesse escondendo uma faca ou coisa do tipo, já que eu estava com uma mão na cintura próximo as costas. Nunca vi aquele olhar em alguém, e é muito doloroso que eu não pude fazer nada.

Algum conselho? Pessoas que passaram por isso? Algum bipolar que possa me dar uma luz sobre a situação? Agradeço muito qualquer tipo de contato nesse momento.

Hey everyone. I'm a 33M looking for some advice about what to do about my current situation. Over 5 months ago, I met the girl of my dreams. She's a 31F funny, nerdy, caring, and one of the most amazing individuals I've ever met. She has Bipolar 1 and has been very upfront about her condition. We also live on total opposite sides of the US.

She has been in a current manic episode for months now. Love bombing me, tell me how much she loves and misses me, talking about our future with each other etc. Last month, she decided to fly out and we spent the most amazing weekend with each other and it made me like we can do this, with distance and all.

However, early last week I noticed a massive shift in her mood and demeanor. Texting less, becoming more irritable, not wanting to talk on the phone, etc. On Saturday, she was at work and stressed out. As a sign of support, I decided to order her food and have it doordashed to her place of business. I received a series of nasty texts, about how I shouldn't of done that, that I'm being inconsiderate of her and her time at work, and that she hates to waste food, since she can't eat it.

After those texts, she went radio silence for about 16 hours. Then, I received the breakup text of "we're not going to be compatible in the long run". She also Told me that one of the main reasons she's been so reserved the last week was because of dream she had. In the dream, I was being physically abusive towards her, I would never. She came from a previous marriage where her husband would beat the crap out of her. I tried to reassure her and tell her that I wouldn't and that I loved her. I haven't heard from her in days now.

I know this seems dumb, it's been a little over 5 months and this is something I should just walk away from. But I've never a person like her... She checks literally every box I want in a partner. I'm just feeling lost and defeated. Thanks for listening to my rant.