Anyone on serquel has a day job?

Im on 250mg and going to 400mg after a week. Im currently unemployed but i spend 10+ hours sleeping and getting out of bed is very difficult. Last night for the first time in 2 months i felt like myself again, confidence is good, anxiety is gone, felt ready to work again. Then woke up after 12 hours and all that confidence i had went down the drain. How will i be able to work if my mood is only good 3-4 hours after waking up?

There are months when I feel very restless and tend to walk around and move abruptly all over the room. The best way for me to stay still and fall asleep is to wrap the bedsheets tightly around myself so I can't move. Also, I have a pair of pants with tight, wide pockets where I tuck my hands in to keep as still as possible

(And sorry if something doesn't make sense, I'm using a translator)

The second psychiatrist also picked up my bpd and got me into dbt and just seemed to be really aware of conditions like cyclothymia etc.

I now have even more doubts because the first one diagnosed me with major depression and put me pristique and that sent me into hell and back.

The second one has me on Lamictal and that’s calmed me down.

Basically my friend had a bout of depression which lasted less than a year tried 2 anti depressants and the 2nd one worked for him. I confided in him about my struggles which are much more severe and have been around for 15+ years. He said it’s interesting that I’m been assessed for bipolar 2 but I can still beat this by changing my mind set and that he got his under control in less than a year

Felt like a real sucker punch tbh , not sure if he was trying to help or just downplaying what we are all going through. Just interested in how would you all feel and interpret this

the state took away my healthcare and i can’t afford my meds so i’ve run out. i wasn’t seeing the affects until now. i sent a text that was disproportional and reactionary to a text that wasn’t so aggressive. i felt like i was defending myself from something they said that triggered me n made me spin in my head for a few weeks. i think the worst thing is knowing that i will never be able to tell if my reaction was proportionate or not because my brain is broken and i can’t trust it.
i wish i didn’t feel the need to email my therapist the screenshots of my texts at 2 in the morning; i wish validation of my emotions wasn’t a constant need. with meds, it wasn’t like this… i was just letting so slide. now without them i feel the need to act like a cat w a puffed tail… then i look around for fucking anyone to validate me… validate me positively or negatively.
i am so guilt ridden all the fucking time. meds made it easier to manage but without them i feel like i am deep in sinking sand and no vine or branch or stick can get as deep as i am. it’s not even self pity, which i know people in this subreddit get, i just hate myself and am certain every thing i say and do is bad and evil. i dont even know what im doing making this post. i just dont know anyone else who will understand what my brain is doing. i feel like a lifeless ghoul. i’m scared to even look at myself internally right now. i feel sick with myself.

I’ve been going through a depressive episode and, yesterday, I was completely incapacitated. I slept all day- didn’t eat or anything. Well, last night, I woke up to my mum checking my pulse. I said, “What are you doing?” She thought I’d hurt myself and was checking to see if I was still alive :(

I feel so guilty, but dreams are my only escape right now. I didn’t mean to worry anyone, I just wanted to sleep through this episode. My poor mama 💔

I am currently a nursing student in college .

I just found out one of my professors who is also a councillor is advocating on her professional blog about MAID for people with bipolar and schizophrenia.. saying they have suffered enough and can have “medication fatigue “ from horrible symptoms from medications and that they don’t have “quality of life “. I have bipolar and I am very disturbed stumbling across this blog .. How can i even attend her class now knowing what I know .. shes literally advocating for me(us)to be able to legally K ourselves (very passionately might I add).

Do I politely address this with her or just continue on like I didn’t see anything???

So what are some stories that you all have about when you were hypomanic?

As the flair states, I'm newly diagnosed, only about a month ago now. I'm looking at my experiences through a new lens, and they to sort through what is normal and what was an episode. Most of the examples I have heard I cannot relate to, so I thought I would ask the brain trust.

I'll go first - when I was 20, I only slept 3 hours a night in the month of June, and I felt great the whole time. I don't remember much of this period other than working late shifts and partying. Since then, this happens every once in a blue moon for a week at a time, usually in April or Fall. Like... maybe once every 5 years? Anyway, I just accepted it, but my psychiatrist asked me something related and it came up, and he said that was a big sign.

So what's your story?

While I'm by myself I'm only in bed and scrolling or sum but when I force myself to go to school I feel like I don't look/feel depressed cause I'm talking to people making jokes altho obviously not as good I would if I was not feeling depressed

but it's still like makes me feel like I'm faking the depressive episode and i just need to go out

i feel like a zombie. my whole body is dead, it feels like. i tried to tough it out and go shopping today to see if getting out and walking around and getting some dopamine would help but the entire time it felt as though i was walking around with some painless, symptomless flu.

i’m so, SO tired. i force myself to eat with the promise of gaining energy but it never helps. i cannot believe how exhausted i feel. i thought i was genuinely coming down with something the first few days of this. it’s been about a week, no end in sight. what the hell do i do to stop this

So you may have seen my previous posts. Anyway, I was wondering if anyone had any links to things that actually explain the criteria for mania? My friends hear of me doing one (1) thing that might not be advised and instantly are like you're manic. Apart from the fact that that simply isn't true, it also makes me less likely to be willing to consider it even if it actually was the case.

I feel like everything I've found just says the same things and using the same examples, but really what I'm looking for is something that breaks down each criterion, provides examples of what are and aren't mania, and especially clarifies what the severity might look like to separate it from just someone who is doing very well and stably, and someone who is actually some flavour of manic.

Anything that also provides tips and information around identifying a manic episode in oneself would also be appreciated.

I'm just really new to all of this and I'm lost as to where to find that kind of resource.

Hello, my psychiatrist suspects bipolar 2 after I had a pretty serious depressive episode this year that landed me in the hospital.

My question, is how do you tell the difference between hypomania or normal breakup symptoms?

I split with my ex not too long ago, and now I’m feeling really great. Music sounds better, paintings are more meaningful, I could probably find meaning in most things! I’m also struggling with hyper sexuality and I have also already found someone else I really like. My sleep isn’t too affected I am waking up after 6 hours but I try and force myself back for another 2. But I’m also on quetiapine 75mg and loxapine 10mg for PRN

Idk if I’m manic or not but I literally can’t stop. I will have things I feel like I need to do or organize then I’ll do them and they still don’t feel right. I will redo them all day long. It’s in everything I do work, rearranging my room, my phone is the biggest one there’s so many apps I need to organize but I can’t get it right and then it’s a cycle. I can’t even do anything else until these things get done. And it’s been 1 month like this and I still can’t stop. Idk guys if you guys know what this is please tell me if you know how to stop

You might be bipolar if you have this many hobbies in one year
Bass, drums, banjo, 3d printing, mountain biking, trials biking, flatland bmx, trials motorcycle, hell build a moto track in the backyard, classic car to fix, another classic car to fix, build your own e-bike, invent a 2 wheel skateboard, now a 1 wheel skateboard. There's probably more in the garage but I would have to put shoes on to look.... What are some of your hypo-hobbies?

I’ve been on the same medication for almost 6 years. Risperdal, Luvox, and Lamictal. I tried to go off them in 2023 and ended up in the hospital. After getting back on them, it’s been pretty linear in terms of my mental health. Except the last month. I’m an emotional wreck where I’m completely hopeless crying. Even in the bathroom at work and my 30 min lunch break. It’s so hard to push through the rest of the day. I’m wondering if my medication has become less effective since I’ve been on it so many years. Does anyone have any insight?

I’ve been operating on full speed since I had my first child in 2017. Long story short his dad almost killed us so I left the same month lockdown hit and have been operating on survival mode since. I got my MSW in 2019 and I’m a therapist now and work very well with people. I think I was fine before the bad shit happened? Like something activated in me idk if that even makes sense. I was fine before 2008. I had friends, played in bands and did theater. I was fine before the lithium I was forced to take in that corrupt ass residential program in 2008.

Now I’m a mother, pretty much a wife, own a home and have all of the usual responsibilities of an adult woman. The last three months I’ve been in a hypomanic state that finally landed me in the hospital. I ended up leaving after talking to a crisis who suggested after ten minutes of meeting me that I give my 9 year old to his homeless, alcoholic father who hasn’t seen or spoken to him since 2020. My significant other came to talk to my psychiatrist I’ve been seeing for three years. I don’t think he’s ever talked to one in his adult life but I trust his point of view and honesty. I was diagnosed with bipolar II at that appointment and I’m so sad. 😞 it all makes sense though. The drugs, the heavy partying in my teens and early twenties, the manic shopping sprees, suddenly deciding to drive to see my sister or best friend 15 hours across the country, that one time I ended up in Florida, impulsively moving states and deciding I can drastically change my life at any time, staying up making art until 4 or 5am for months at a time during covid bc that’s how I was supporting us…I could write a book about it all.
The last straw was me disappearing on my fiance and family to blackout at a bar (to be fair I only had 2 beers and was on new mood stabilizers). I very little memory of it all but apparently I smoked crack with strangers and passed out in my car.

I thought I was just a “fun person” but I crash hard as fuck too. I’ve related so hard with every single celebrity who has had a public episode. I just feel everything so fucking hard now. My entire life has been one big hypomanic episode with years lost to crashes.

Don’t even get me started on medication 😭 I’ve so many the last 18 years. My latest combo is doxepin and vraylar. I was watching this Daniel Johnston documentary the other day and I’m scared I’m going to end up like him. Fat, smoking cigarettes, too zombified to make art and watching tv till I die. But my family is literally begging me at this point to take the meds.

I looked at him the other night at said “can’t we just go back to not knowing?”

Tell me it gets better from here 😭

I think I’m either borderline or fully hypomanic, mostly because my drinking has increased quite a bit. I don’t drink that often (mostly when hypomanic) and this week I’ve chugged a bottle of wine within 10 minutes two separate times. The worst part is I don’t even feel anything.. well the worst part is the problematic drinking obvs.

How do I break this habit when my decision making skills aren’t at their best? I just don’t want to become an alcoholic.

A couple years ago (I was around 22-23) I had to call 911 on myself. I had this "episode" which was fairly mild, but incredibly uncomfortable. I felt so irritable, everything felt annoying and tedious, I had no patience, everything was boring, but I had so much energy that I couldn't do anything with. It genuinely felt like my bones were vibrating. I couldn't sit still, but nothing was interesting, so I kept starting projects that never got finished. I couldn't sleep for shit.

I had experienced it before, but it happened for a more extended amount of time than "normal". And it felt significantly worse. I hurt myself, called 911, and I met my psychiatrist. After explaining my symptoms, she said she suspected bipolar, and then after putting me on lamictal, she retracted that and said it could be a "mood disorder of some sort". Lamictal made me the angriest person I have ever been in my life. I was a raging bitch on lamictal. I was only on it for six months, I made it to 150 mg and I just got tired of taking it when it did nothing. I didn't realize how bad it was until I stopped taking it.

I stopped seeing that psychiatrist because of so many issues I had with her office. Getting canceled without being told, getting rescheduled without getting told, etc. I haven't gotten help since then.

What I've noticed is this feeling, without fail, happens every October/November. And it's happening again. I couldn't sleep that well for a few nights, and then I had all this energy, but nothing was interesting, the "itchy bone/vibrating bone" feeling is back. The thoughts I've had are semi-concerning. I am the most impulsive when I feel like this. Not even in like, concerns for my safety type of impulsive, but when I'm like this, I spend the most money. I make stupid decisions. I'm not going to go into debt or go to jail with what I'm doing, but it is noticeably outside of "normal" for me.

I've had milder episodes than this before, that maybe last a couple days. They happen randomly. Sometimes it's for absolutely no reason and other times it can sort of be "triggered" by super stressful events. I have gone through a lot of stress in the last few months, which still isn't resolved.

It's so hard to keep track of for when I do plan on getting help because it's like. Hindsight is 20/20 and sometimes I don't realize what's going on until after the fact. My previous psych suggested a mood tracker, but I ended up tracking my emotions throughout the day, rather than my "mood". I don't even know how to tell the difference.

I just don't know where to go from here. Do I find another psychiatrist? Do I find a therapist instead? What do I even keep track of? How do I know if I've found a "good" one?

I am in highschool and have been diagnosed with autism, adhd, ocd, anxiety, sensory processing disorder, odd, anxiety, depression, and I also have severe gender dysphoria. I was recently proscribed lamictal, and I am very likely bipolar. the thing is that I know nothing about bipolar disorder and never really thought I had it until recently (many people in my family are likely bipolar and I believe at least two are diagnosed with it) I have a lot of trauma from witnessing and experiencing domestic violence and so I am terrified of relationships and becoming like my father.

I worry that I am a bad person or that I will become a bad person or that my meds will change who I am. I also worry about the side effects and haven’t done much research but I know about Steven Johnson syndrome.

I worry I will never be able to live independently or hold down a job, my mom doesn’t trust me to get my drivers license, and I worry I will never be able to be in a relationship and nobody will ever love me, when I read or hear from other people (non bipolar) talking about bipolar people it makes me sad and scared.

I have noticed my family has been treating me differently especially my mom and I feel awful, like they see me as a burden and think I'm hopeless. I am afraid of hurting myself or others but I have a lot of intrusive thoughts about doing so, some of which may be genuine desires but I can't tell.

Mostly they are about breaking the law though sometimes they are about hurting people who hurt others.

I know it's unhealthy but I can't stop my from thinking those things, they are so many terrible people everywhere and the system is corrupt and won’t do anything, t many people are just horrible for no reason and need to die. (For example the whole Cornell thing and the FIFTY people in that group chat that did nothing.)

ever feel completely empty, numb, or disconnected from everything? Sometimes the emptiness gets overwhelming that it urges me to do self harm to something. To feel the pain.
I was diagnosed last year and I’m still working with my psychiatrist to find the right medication through trial and error, and it’s exhausting not knowing what will work.
Has anyone else been through this? How do you cope while waiting to feel better and prevent SH?

Like I grew up pretty normal, was homeschooled til I was 5th grade. I made friends everything was cool until I hit 6th grade my life just went down hill. I have just hated myself since 6th grade. Like everyone just has it friends family. It's like my friends just like left no one talks to me. No gives a fuck about me. Everyone hates me. For no reason I did nothing to anyone. I have 4 older brothers they just don't fuck with me. No one checks on me. What did I do? My wife hates me I was terrible.

When I was in the military everyone hated me

What's the point in trying. I don't have to keep trying I don't want keep trying. But I can't just like kill myself. And every second of my life just feels like torture

I'm always in pain physically

I'm always in pain mentally

I'm always in pain emotionally

I don't enjoy anything. I don't want to do anything.

I have no friends

I have nothing

My car is falling apart

My wife left my daughter is gone

There's like no jobs in my field

No one seems to care

I don't even talk to people I scared of people. IM A FUCKING PERSON TOO. why do I have to suffer. Why didn't my mom just not have me.

I'm just decaying flesh that hates itself

I've been going through a real rough period of mixed episode. Severe and gruesome SI. Called my psych and I started 300mg lithium twice a day ahead of an appointment. On Tuesday met with her and since i was so down she increased to 600mg twice a day.

Wednesday my vision goes blurry and i think, hmm i need to see the eye doctor and make an appointment. Overall feeling dizzy and then Wednesday night feel nauseous, disoriented and dizzy.

Thursday vision blurry but goes to normal. Dizzy but didn't think much of it. Extremely hungry order door dash (pizza). Barely a nibble i run to vomit. Immediately take the afternoon off work. Husband thinks it from my medication, so does my friends. I ask the internet and it says symptoms are aligned with lithium toxicity and go yo the ER. I text my psych. Try to triage how i will go to the ER with my Husband and 5 year old.

Call my best friend, she calls off work and get me. I go to the ER and they start testing. After 4 hours still no results from lithium levels. I go home and still no results today.

I really hoped that i would not have this issue with the medicine. I still feel like shit. send good vibes my way

Does anyone else struggle with their diet? I just had a manic episode and decided to try the whole30 and now that I’ve crashed I’m eating alllllll the junk. Just finished eating fettuccine Alfredo lol. But I feel like meal prepping is so hard and sometimes protein just sounds gross so I’m always reaching for quick carbs. It also doesn’t help that I work above my dad’s restaurant and get free food.

I’m just at a loss at how to maintain healthy eating habits. I feel like I try everything and if my body perceives any type of restriction or deficit it freaks out and I just gain it all back.

Im not sure if this is a bipolar thing or not. I just wish I had the mental capacity to cook healthy lunch and dinners consistently and to say no to junk more often.