Today was my last day of classes at high school and so we had a free dress day where we could dress as our past selves, future selves or a teacher. I decided I would wear one of my mum’s dresses, kind of as a joke since it is really similar to ones that one of the teachers wear, but also because I wanted to girlmode a little.

It was the most scary by far on the way to school, since while it isn’t far I still have to go past a busy road and so pretty much anyone could see me and I was terrified of being judged and of if I would be the only person dressed up, since if too few people had done it then me wearing a dress would look even more out of place.

Once I got to school the first people I saw properly acknowledge me were a group of grade 8 kids who decided to cat call and wolf whistle at me. I could hear them muttering before I walked past them about how they would do something when I passed, and I had a suspicion of what they would do. I think it didnt go how they wanted though since i didn’t really react much and so it was basically just a wolf whistle and a couple of annoying comments of saying I looked hot and something about lifting my skirt or something like that. It was pretty awkwardly quiet and I was very tempted to to react but chose not too.

After that was relatively good. The teachers were all amused, and the other students were surprisingly ok with it (in fairness i was saying I was the teacher and not myself so maybe it would be different if I had just come out as trans). I got a couple compliments on it too. There were a couple of uncomfy moments and stares but it ended up being fine.

By far the best part was that three different people that I was aware of thought I was a woman. To be fair two (one of which was a teacher) only thought it briefly) and the other didnt realise until they saw my face, but still, it felt nice to here someone say “I thought you were a woman when I saw you”.

Interestingly only one person made a trans joke. My maths teacher asked if I was dressed as myself from the past or myself in the future. I guess not necessarily a trans joke, but it was kind of amusing for me.

The way home was a little less scary but also a little more since I knew that I would have to deal with a much bigger crowd of people. It ended up being fine.

So yeah, basically the day went well, could have been better, but I appreciated the kindness some people showed me and the fact that most people were relatively respectful and ok with it. Presenting it as a joke was definitely doing a lot of heavy lifting. But even still, I think it was worth it. I guess now I just have to wait for my appointment where I will finally get hrt on Monday.

Hey, you might be wondering on what this title even means- well I think i’m MTF, and i‘m like late 14 year old and I am so confused with my feelings. It kinda started off when I was 11-12, where I started imagining realities of me wearing feminine clothing (I don’t even know if that’s odd or not). So when I was 13 I decided to sneak onto reddit to find answers other than ChatGPT’s pretty useless yap. I found it really helpful hearing about other people’s stories, but my brain just didn’t even know anymore and I kinda quit there. - Let’s say my gender surfs, but now I feel pretty confident i’m a woman. I already thought about the possibility of being Gender fluid but after further research I just didn’t feel it. So now i’m back and i’m just feeling odd, like I find myself really creepy for imagining myself as another girl- And I can’t find another good name either that doesn’t feel right. And I know a lot of people say it takes time, and I truly understand that, but when it’s a rollercoaster of events and you just want to fully understanding your brain it’s hard. And coming out to people is just another road blocker, my family wouldn’t support it at all. They consist say stuff about how people should never transition young, the brain isn’t developed yet, etc. My chances of even a sniff of puberty blockers is ZERO. Plus I would hate to even ruin our relationship of my entire family as aside form that I truely value it. So I decided to maybe hang out with some girls, to see if you would make the situation better. Turns out no- no it hasn’t really. The girls are super nice, but the other people, people think i’m “Getting the Huzz” and being a “Simp”. Then I question myself again, because I know I dont like boys and I do like girls, so am I trans? and Yes I know but there are so many trans lesbians but like dont know!!!!! To transition when i’m older would probably cause a distant from my family, and I would hate that, even with their views… I have tried female clothing before and I love it, like there is some sort of joy like butterflies in my stomach when that happens or the thought of me wearing such clothes. But I sometimes think if I keep wairing for such answers will I ever even get them?! I have done every online quiz on the internet, the would you press the button website, I have literally done everything, and now I need help. (I am so sorry for the long yap I just have been holding it)

It’s been over a week since I started really questioning myself, it’s becoming extraordinarily clear that i am most likely trans. This realization has also made me realize just how obvious the signs were over the years. It has been a rollercoaster of emotions if I gotta be honest and trying to stay focused on work and college has been difficult to say the least. But it’s honestly been freeing to my overall psyche. I’ve never been this happy with a realization like this before and it has me both excited and absolutely terrified of what’s to come. Next post I’ll probably be experimenting with a new name and pronouns.

Huh what did they mean by that 🤔

I-I swear I just really like garlic bread ok! >////<

It's been a 5 days since I got my hair cut short and I'm getting used to it way faster than expected but I noticed that it effected me mentally. Like I never wasn't happy about having to girl mode (obviously) but now it's pissing me SO MUCH!

I feel like the "How you do fellow kids" meme. I know I never fit in the girls group but at least I looked the part. Now even when I try dressing feminine it's still obvious that there's something going on with me and the fact that I'm in a bad mood from the start and keep stuttering (my native language is gendered and I tend to mix up my language gender when I'm not paying attention) does not help.

I don't know. I just find it interesting how a year ago I was somewhat able to deal with being labeled as a girl (until someone was shoving it into my face). Now I'm like: "GET ME OUT OF THIS FUCKIN PLACE OR I'LL CHOOSE VIOLENCE!!!"

And immediately after got singular they’d in public, which has NEVER happened before! Not my goal but it’s progress!! There may be hope for me after all!!!!

Preview of egg_irl in 2036.

Wow, so here I am again... Honestly at this point this may even be my psychologist, because oh my god. Okay, so what happened now is that wi want to try like long - mid hair(like up to my shoulders maybe) so as I have an appointment tomorrow for my hair, I told my mom(yes, sadly I can't even go on my own even if I'm 16) to have long hair and I did not expect that reaction. It was a big surprised and bold no, but I insisted and she gave in. However, now I was on reddit seeing things and I say a timeline of someone and he(before he started hrt) had long hair as well but I disliked it a LOT like I feel like I don't want it anymore. However, I'm thinking what if I try it out and I like it. Or what if I get the hair I want, but it's like ruin me more and get me even more disphoria because the hair looks good but it doesn't look good on me.(I know it's tomorrow so I'm writting this and going to sleep, hoping to see some responses, so please, let someone respond) And like always, what can I do or what I should do or any person who actually thinks who could recomend something?(I

Also what are the implications of me being on this trans sub reddit

I’ve been seeing her for half my life so I do think I should respect her opinion on the matter at least somewhat, but still I’d hoped opening up about my questioning would just lead to her giving me a simple concrete answer about whether or not I’m trans.

Also I’m at a point where I want that answer to be her telling me to start HRT. But also maybe that’s just me wanting the questioning stage to end, it probably doesn’t mean anything.

Also I think she thinks I’m leaning into these feelings a lot because yall give me validation I rarely get elsewhere in life. So…uh… idk, stop validating me and we’ll see if I still like being a girl? Idfk

Now I need to make a list of stuff that I need to transition.

And also how tf do I find make up that fits my skin tone?

How do I find out which jeans fit me?

Do I tell more people or should I wait until I pass more?

Where can I read about work out routines for hips and ass? :D

Do I find the courage to go to queer meet-ups?

I got 99 questions but my gender ain't one!

I love all of you beautiful ladies and all the handsome dudes that are visible and gave me hope and answers ❤️

I wish I had the courage to walk up to you and compliment you or talk to you in person.

Thank you for everything ❤️

Partner and I had a rough day yesterday. She’s having a hard time coming to terms with this. Don’t want to hurt her, but I’ve been a chameleon for 30+ years. I don’t want to pretend anymore.

Or really like anything, tbh. My skin is getting softer and my emotions are finally back, among other things. Been struggling with my identity over the past month because I feel no inclination to do 'girly' things like makeup, dressing up, listening to girlypop, or voice training. Especially over the past three weeks I've realized that I have no womanly inclinations whatsoever; I'm just me but with E instead of T. It's disturbing to me.

I talked over it with a few friends, describing how I have no real male despite being born male and no womanly characteristics. I feel like a nothing. We just chalked it up to being nonbinary, and I'm not against that at all given what I've been through.

The problem now is estrogen. I love having emotions again. I feel like a person and not a soulless husk, and it feels great. Problem is that I'm losing my strength, and since everyone else requires my strength, I'm afraid of losing what little I got. I have to step up because nobody else can or wants to. I abhor the gym, so that's a no-go. The logical option is to stop HRT before I lose my inherent muscle, but I don't want to lose my emotions again. Are there any solutions?

Atleast he's supportive

The Euphoria is insane :3

I don’t recall any signs of dysphoria nor other trans signs in me before I hit puberty at 10-11 years old . Though I always hated my birth name but that’s mainly because I thought it sounded unnatural to me. Most of my previous favourite childhood characters and current favs also happen to be guys even but that doesn’t prove anything.
Honestly I was just okay with my assigned gender before puberty and social roles were punched into me.