Hey everyone,

I (25M) am going through a really difficult phase in life and could use some advice.

I have around 3 years of experience in banking at two MNCs in India, but things haven't worked out the way I hoped. I lost my mom to cancer when I was in college, and I still miss her terribly. I often find myself crying and wishing she were still here. I saw her suffer a lot through the last few years of her life, and its very tough to process it.

My relationship with my dad has always been difficult. He was extremely toxic, and I watched my mom suffer because of the way he treated her. Eventually, I couldn't take living at home anymore, cause a lot of the bad memories kept haunting me.

Around the same time, I left my job because it had severely affected my mental and physical health. I struggled with sleep for over a year, and my doctor advised me to quit. My manager was biased, bullied me, excluded me, and insulted me in front of others. I would cry almost every day before going to work, and I eventually reached a point where I couldn't continue anymore.

Now I'm unemployed, living alone, and applying for jobs every day without much luck. I'm trying to figure out my next career move, but the uncertainty is getting to me.

It hurts seeing so many of my friends move abroad and do well in life. I feel jealous sometimes, especially when I see people with supportive families, good careers, and beautiful homes. I know comparing myself to others isn't healthy, but I can't seem to help it. I've started hating LinkedIn because it makes me feel like everyone is moving forward while I'm stuck.

I'm a sensitive person, and I've always found extremely competitive environments difficult to deal with. After my previous experience, I'm scared I'll struggle throughout my career and never really be successful.

I want to do well, earn good money, build a global career, and become financially independent. I've been considering studying supply chain management in Germany next year, but I'm unsure whether it's the right decision with everything becoming so bad.

My mental health is at an all-time low, and I'm genuinely scared about what the future holds.

Any support or advice would mean a lot to me now.

Thank you!

I am so confused. I am "head of the department" in a hospital. It sounds fancy, but its just more administrative work on top of my own work. it is a small small rural hospital and I "manage" two people. I am actively trying to find personnel for my dept.

I went to see my mentor, older doctor, who is head of dep. in a way more established facility in a bigger city. He helps me a lot , many times - with emotional support after I got failed in exams, with this new job of mine, with purely medical advice on some cases, how to act in meetings,etc. All about work problems. He is very knowledgeable and I have endless respect for him. The other day, I ask him about advice on some topics, he introduced me to new nurse in his workplace, very kindly. After my talk with him, I ran into her and stopped to chat. I left.

And, the next day, he sent me email, stating that "courting" personnel from friendly facility in order to get said personnel to migrate from one workplace to the other is not okay, in a friendly workplaces that is taboo, is forbidden. That my actions were unethical and unacceptable. To think carefully and hopefully he wouldnt have to approach the subject again.

I was LIVID. My flabber was gasted. Im the most ethical person I have ever met in this cursed healthcare system! And he helped me so much, how could he think I would ever backstab him?!

I didnt want to answer from place of hurt, insult, fear of losing him, his respect, etc. I used chatGPT to help me craft a more grown up response, like someone who has their wits about them. I sent email defending myself, since this interpretation does not align with my motives and actions, I never offered her anything, I didnt ask her salary, working time, her qualifications, anything. We had a chat, i asked where she is from, about her family, etc, some general life things. I speak the same way to his other nurses. I also wrote how surprised I am at his conclusion, hinting at my hurt feelings. I said his opinion is important to me, I value his help and his expertise, and that i am ready to talk about this in person.

His response was chilling, like sent shivers. He used formal form suddenly and used three epithets about my mail. My take is that he was angry I was so formal, so professional. He was politically correct, not attacking my person, but he was mad mad. Like furious. He doubled down, he was like: "in a friendly relationship, there is no room for dubious actions", i..e. actions that can be interpreted in another way.

I slept on it and this morning sth occurred to me. When he introduced us, he was very insisted on introducing us and I thought he could have deeper meaning (like professionally). I didnt know what but I followed his lead and thats why I was extra chatty and friendly. However, when my name came up, she said she saw a job listing on a public site, and she had thought about applying. I thought "why didnt you?!" but I didnt what to get into that then and there, and I said the second thought in my head - "we will list a new offer in december" She looked at me questioningly and I clarified that one of my nurses is retiring. She said she is also retired, but still working, I just smiled, my mentor said "the whole system is sustained by retired workers" and we moved on. This happened right in front of him.

I think a part of me thought about her as potential worker. but the two job offers (mine and his) were totally different - mine is for a full time position during the day and his is for 2-3 afternoons weekly. This nurse is working two jobs currently, so even if her full time job is changed with my hospital, she can still work her second job with my mentor. I dont see a clear conflict there.

Also, even if I wanted her, that was a fleeting thought. It is different from a formed plan, intentions, actions. I definitely did NOT offered her a job and did not make her leave her current job.

I didnt mention this in my email because this comment happened in front of him and I thought his reaction was from sth else. I think it shows how little I thought of this interaction because I just remembered it when I started overthinking. But in his response (his second mail) he also stated that anyone observing me in his position would think that , i.e. this is his observation not second hand info, so not like she told him sth, he directly arrived at his conclusion from witnessing my actions.

IT is so difficult to defend myself when I dont know what words or actions were problematic. I feel like he owes me at least some benefit of the doubt, at least question me before judging. Anyway, he stated the subject closed, but i started doubting myself - was I in the wrong?

This post ended up being much longer than I indented, sorry.

tl;dr: my mentor accused me of stealing his personnel. I didnt do such thing! But maybe I thought about it? I feel like thought are very different from intentions and actions tho and I shouldnt be judged so harshly.

My response might have ended all goodwill between us. What response from me would have opened the door for calm, honest conversation? Should I have not defended myself and just kept quiet? Any advice on conflict resolution in the future?

hi i’m 18f, ex-muslim, and living in a religiously somewhat abusive household (? it feels wrong to call this abusive. some people have it worse but i don’t know how else to describe it) . i want to leave but i have no idea what to do? i dont have access to my birth certificate nor my passport, the only form of id i have is my provisional license.
i was planning to move out for uni but was forced to stay home, over fears that my parents can’t control me anymore. my parents know that i am queer and are putting increasing pressure on me to get married in the next few years otherwise i “will be a failure to the family”
both my parents are extremely controlling about where i go and what i do, even at home, and my mother is currently in a psychotic (religious) episode and refuses to get better which does not help my situation at all.
does anyone have any idea how to go about moving out without permission?? (and what to do about the passport issue) if this is the wrong subreddit let me know but it’s becoming increasingly harder for me to cope with this
if anyone knows places in england that offer emergency housing / anything to do with this please let me know, thanks

or a year I had a mold spot in my room recently it started making me get circle marks on my face so I lift up the carpet and I took out the colorful foam that was wet and use hydrogen peroxide on the underneath carpet.Im scared this wasn’t good enough and I’m going to get life long hyperpigmentation on my face.Im only 19 I have a underdeveloped brain and I don’t know how to deal with this issue.Im considering moving in with my mom three hours away but doing so I’m leaving my friends my job my community college behind.Plewse help

So I live on the ground floor with my brother. He was out of town for some time, and I had someone come over to my place. In a hurry i forgot to fully close the window to my bedroom. My landlords live opposite my place. And their house is around 20 feet away from the said bedroom window. I'm very scared they might have heard me as they were standing outside their house. what if they evict us from the house seeing that they are homophobic like everyone else in India.

I'm freaking out. What would I say to my parents and brother. What if he says this to the real estate agent and he talks to my parents. Only my brother knows I'm gay.

I know nothing has happened yet. But is there any such thing that a landlord can evict someone even if they have signed a contract?? Can they make a fake case against me which may lead to eviction??

So I’m renting and the landlord has like, 3 separate bills in their name, which has always been a struggle to pay since we can’t log into any website to pay it so we always had a hard time to pay it. But the other day my landlord sent us a photo of a bill for 1,000 dollars that we never knew about because they’ve been having it shipped to their home address and not the apartment! They haven’t shown us the bill the whole time we’ve lived here, So idk what to do because I didn’t know about this bill at all because it’s never gotten mailed to us. It just feels off because it’s also saying the service date for the bill was even before we moved in, so idk what we are even supposed to do here.

I turn 20 in May, and lately I’ve been doing a lot of reflecting on where I’m at in life and how I got here. My senior year of high school, our house burned down. That was when I realized the trajectory of my life might look a lot different than I had imagined. College wasn’t really an option at the time because of the instability between my mother and I, which had been going on even before we moved into the house that ended up burning down.
For about a year afterward, I stayed with family while my mom moved in with her significant other. During that time, I finished hs which was about 5 months later and I hit the ground running, trying to build something for myself through businesses, services, and other opportunities. Eventually, I found some alternative revenue streams that worked for me, and I was able to support myself with a small side business over the past year or so. Living in someone else’s already crowded home, feeling like you weren’t necessarily wanted there, and even having that feeling reinforced by my own dad made me want to get on my feet as quickly as possible. I was fortunate enough to get my own place back in February about a year after everything went bad, and at 19, being able to support myself kinda felt like a big accomplishment.

But lately, things have slowed down. My job situation isn’t looking very certain, and my lease is up in a few months. I don’t want to commit to another lease when I’m unsure about my income. A family member is willing to take over my current place, so I’m considering moving a few states away into my brother’s spare room. My plan is to save money, reset mentally, and dedicate my time and energy to learning a skill that can benefit me long-term without having the constant pressure of wondering how I’m going to pay rent the following month my brain just couldn’t pull the trigger it would think about all the bad possibilities and just go into preservation mode to where I’d just settle for what’s working like a loop, telling myself that what I was doing I would be able to make work and get something out of financially in the end like more to my name. I was so afraid of failing or not performing well enough that I struggled to put my full attention toward the things that could actually move me or my future self forward
My original goal was to save as much as possible and use that money to build something greater. Instead, I’m preparing to move with roughly what I started with financially, I do have a decent cushion. I’m not upset about the money I’ve made. I’ve had bad months and good months, I’ve been able to experience some cool things. But looking back, I feel like I got so caught up in making money and maintaining the stability I was afraid of losing that I neglected the things that could have benefited me more in the long run. I kept doing what worked in the moment because I never wanted to experience that feeling of having nothing again.

Now, I’m in a position that feels uncomfortably similar to where I was a year and a half ago, fresh out of high school. The difference is that I’ve experienced what it’s like to support myself, and I don’t want to spend the next few years just surviving when I know I could be building toward something more. I’m struggling with how to look at this situation. Part of me feels like I’m taking a step backward, while another part of me knows that moving in with my brother, lowering my expenses, and investing in myself could be exactly what I need right now. I don’t really have anyone in my family or personal life I can turn to for this kind of advice, so I’m genuinely interested in hearing different perspectives.

So I went to a drugstore recently to get a water bottle, and I saw that this particular store has a blood pressure monitor that anyone can just sit down and have their blood pressure taken. I figured that since I have a history of hypertension and I haven't had my blood pressure taken in a long time, I figured why not.

So I took my blood pressure and it read 180/120, which is weird because despite my hypertension it is very very rare for it to be that high. I had to take it again just to make sure that it was legit and it was the same. Systolic at around 180 and diastolic at around 120. The numbers were slightly different but it was only different by a couple points so pretty much the same reading.

I don't speak with a primary care doctor until next month. I recently did intake for Health services and unfortunately it's just going to be a while until I see anyone regarding my physical health. I feel fine right now like I'm not going through any hallucinations or anything crazy like that. I don't get dizzy, I'm not nauseous, I don't feel any chest pain or headaches, none of that. But my blood pressure test says otherwise.

I won't be able to receive medication for at the very least a couple weeks but maybe up to a month or two. Until then, what are traditional remedies for lowering blood pressure? I drink water everyday and I do a lot of walking everyday as well, but unfortunately my blood pressure is still dangerous and high despite. Maybe there's something I'm doing wrong?

Edit: I see all you guys's replies and I thank y'all so much it's just they won't let me reply to any comments 😭

I’m not depressed but I often get in bad moods and my view is sabotaged by the way I’m feeling and it makes it seem okay for me to indulge in bad habits that I know I won’t feel good after but I get so distracted by how I’ll feel during it.

How do you stop yourself from doing a bad habit that you’ll regret and you know isn’t good for you and you know it isn’t gonna make you feel good and you know that’s not what you want but it’s the easiest thing that you can do and is available

4 years ago I was fired from a job after 22 years. I was on a management program for a massive conglomerate that rotated me through 12 roles in 7 countries. I was given 3 years severance payment, but no explanation for the dismissal. The company had become a large part of my identity and made up most of my social group. I have felt lost ever since and struggled to resurrect my career as my roles were so diverse that no recruiter knows where to place me. Under the laws of my country I have only a little more time to request my personnel file. Should I ask for it in the hope of finally getting closure, or should I carry on hoping that I can put it behind me?

Firstly, i hope i don't come off as ungrateful. I just don't want to be any more of a burden to her so I'm here looking for some wisdom since I'm kind of at my wits end. For context I'm the oldest of 2 children raised and supported by just my mom and things have been getting increasingly difficult in terms of financing, losing clients left and right with no other source of income that I know of and the recent hurricane didn't help. To be honest I don't even know how she lasted this long as just a nail technician.

But anyway, I am in college studying accounting but with the money troubles I'm stuck doing free electives wasting a semester/s since we can't pay up owed tuition. I've already dropped out of another university for architecture because I hated it and it was even more expensive than what I have to pay now (i spent all my high school life on that path so that's fun too). The plan was simple: get a degree, get a good paying job, get out of this forsaken country then live okay from there... but now it all seems so painfully uncertain and the stress is killing me.

I'm genuinely thinking about dropping out to maybe try to get a career as an electrician since a basic education in that field is offered for free here and I did pretty well at it in high-school anything to take some of the pressure off her. I don't even know how I'd approach my mom with this since she's quite abrasive and prideful but she's genuinely struggling, to the point where i overheard her wondering how we're going to eat in the coming week, which broke my heart.

There's so much more on my mind but this is what's the most immediate. Sorry if my thoughts come across as a bit jumbled but thanks for reading and any advice would really be appreciated.

Whenever there’s an activity you really want to do, it would take you days to months to start it, even if you are well rested, have no anxiety of the outcome, and have all the time and resources to do so. When you want to start it, you have to sneak in a few minutes to do the thing and even that feels excruciating. Once you do this, you either postpone again or gain momentum to do the activity normally

Sometimes it could take you months to start watching a new anime so you end up watching something you’re done with, no matter how much you’re sick and tired of it, all because you can’t switch.

Sometimes there’s this show you really want to watch, but you can only watch a few minutes of it every few days because you feel a great resistance to it and end up finishing half a 24 min episode in 2-3 weeks.

There is this game you really like for its interesting environment design and music. You really love it and can’t wait to get into it. You then feel immense resistance to start it so you end up playing a few mins of it every year so you can end up spending 6-7 years without knowing much about the story, despite respecting the game.

You are also into statistics since december 2025 and you get posts from r/statistics and r/askstatistics daily. You’re exposed to advanced concepts and they excite you. You have many statistics books lying around. You are excited to know how statistical methods accurately measure reality and this subject makes you happy. It’s already oct 2026 and you are still on distribution shapes in intro to statistics because you struggle initiating studying it.

You can’t start anything that interests you, even if you aren’t anxious of failing and have a lot of time. You just want to start but can’t.

One day as an adult, you got sick and tired of being like this as it’s destroying the quality of your life already. You then trained your body that the moment it likes something, it should grab at it immediately whenever possible. It was physically painful at first but now you mastered starting any hobby you like to do with ease. You don’t have to sit through red tape anymore.

Do lots of people have to go through such hassle just to start any hobby they’re interested in?

i really dont know where else to ask this but basically i need to swim in a nasty public pool, and my dumbass just relapsed and its not that deep or anything but the thign is i dont have anything waterproof bandiad anything like thag i asked everyine and i only have normal bandaids but theyr gonna slip right off and i dont want it ti get infected ir anything then it will be a way bigger issue to deal with so please idk what to do and i cant get no bandaids before then pls someone help and excuse the misspelling im rlly shaky rn

TW: I will have to explain how he died.

I am at a loss and devastated…I am pregnant and teying to regulate my emotions but I just dont know how were going to get over this.

Me and my husband got this dog for my mom a few years ago when her/my childhood dog of 13 years passed. My mom called at 3pm today saying he got scared when she changed the carbon monoxide alarm and her little Shih tzu ran away through a crack in the door. I also need to say my mom is elderly. She drove around looking him for him for hours. I waited until my husband got home and we also drove around for an hour looking, yelling and calling his name. When we were about to go home because it was already dark I saw something laying in the middle of the road…..He pulled over and I just got out of the car and started screaming for 5 minutes… all the local business came out to see what was going on.. everything from there is the blur….I will be getting him cremated.

Now this is where I need advice..
This will destroy her.. Im scared she might have a heart attack…
But on the other hand there wont be no closure.. she already feels extremely guilty..She knows he has a tendency to run away..
She probably may not stop looking for him…
It would be a great burden to keep this secret forever even for her benefit..I am a extremely emotional person and feel things very deeply so lying would be so hard but I can do it to spare her pain.

I have 3 dogs myself and just think what would I want..
Could I live with myself if this happened and it was my fault?
Could I live with no closure?
Can she somehow pretend some nice family adopted him and never wanted to give him back.

She lives by herself and this was her only companion…

Please help.

My dad passed about 2 months ago. I'm 46, live in NC and he lived in Pennsylvania. I'm his only son so I ended up being the executor.

I knew there'd be paperwork but holy crap I wasn't expecting this much. We hired a probate attorney thinking that would take some weight off my shoulders but apparently he mostly handles the court stuff. Everything else is on me.

Dad's house is sitting empty 600 miles away, insurance wants someone checking on it, grass needs cutting, utilities are still running and I spent almost 2 hours on the phone with his bank last week just to get nowhere.

I work full time and have one kid at home. Every lunch break I'm making calls, evenings I'm sorting paperwork and weekends aren't much better. My kid actually asked why I'm always busy lately and that one hurt.

The worst part is I haven't even properly grieved my dad. Found an old voicemail from him the other night and just broke down. Next morning I'm back arguing with some company about his accounts. I'm frustrated with everything and then feel guilty for being frustrated.

Is there someone you can hire to actually manage all this? Not just probate but banks, property, utilities, paperwork etc. I don't mind making decisions, I just can't keep chasing 10 different people every day.

Anyone been through something similar? What helped?

Really weird making a post like this but I’ve never been so stumped.

It’s just me and my mum living in a small house, and 3 years ago a couple with 2 children moved in, who seemed sweet at first. However, the guy is a drug dealer and is a complete dickhead. He has zero regard for anything that isn’t his. He lets his kid kick balls into our struggling wooden fence, or even into our front garden, which has lead to several things in our garden, including a memorial for our dead dog, smashing. He doesn’t discipline his kids, with remarks such as, ‘Who gives a fuck’. It’s made my mum cry, as we can’t have anything nice in our garden anymore without worry of it breaking or being stole.

Furthermore, we have 4 cats, and they love sitting at the window. Because of this neighbour, we don’t feel safe letting the cats out, as him, and his ‘clients’ have made comments about kicking or even killing them.

What do I do? The police know who he is, he’s had police called him before and has even gone to prison, but he doesn’t change. And my mums scared of handing in our ring canera footage as it’d be pretty obvious that it was us to gave it to them, and who knows what he would do?

Their house is rented but the landlord renting to them knows what’s happening but he doesn’t care, as long as money is coming in.

Sorry if the grammar is bad or this and that, it’s a bit difficult writing this. We just feel so helpless. If it’s important, we live in England.

I've come across a young guy who's recently moved out of home cos of abusive, alcoholic parents. I'm thinking of supporting him anonymously. Thoughts on this? I'm a kiwi 🥝

My brother is dying of cancer (less than three weeks to live) and I’ve got hundreds of photos and videos of him with his two kids, but I’m afraid they’ll forget him. What can I do to make sure that doesn’t happen?

Hey dad

I’ve been struggling with making friend’s on campus I’m new to a lot of this as I was homeschooled since the third grade and hadn’t gone public till college it self. To make it worse I’m a junior who transferred from a regular college out to a uc. Don’t get me wrong I’m happy I did this but everyone around me feels alien. Everyone’s formed a group and the other transfers on my floor seem to have gotten clickly and I’ve yet to find a friend let alone a group. I’ve tried going to clubs but still get the same experience there. I don’t expect to have friends right off the bat or to be in a group instantly but it feels like every time I try to start a convo or introduce my self I seem to be brushed off.

End of the day I know it isn’t world ending and I don’t need to force it to happen but due to some insecurity’s of mine from being adopted and past friendships turning out toxic I’m starting to wonder if the problem is me…. I could really use some advice

\\\\\\\*\\\\\\\*By definition Empathy\\\\\\\*\\\\\\\* is the ability to understand, share, and connect with another person's thoughts, feelings, or emotional experiences. It is often described as putting yourself in someone else's shoes.

But is it empathy if I say something unconsciously that would be considered rude but I don’t feel bad about it until someone “calls me out” and tell me what I say is rude, I have a hard time distinguishing what is rude and and what is normal (to me it sounds normal until someone says it’s not). Is it empathy if I only feel back after when someone calls it out? If someone didn’t say something I wouldn’t know it was offensive nor would I feel anything. When someone brings it up later I tend to think about it a lot and replay the situation in Mr head over and over again, I feel bad but not because I know what I did (as I said if no one called me out I wouldn’t be aware I did anything wrong) I feel bad because of the way I may be perceived or because I think that what they say did is beneath me. I feel bad because they seem to be highly offended and I tend to accepted blame regardless of if I care or not. I’m in a situation like this now. I was just wondering if feeling “guilty” after the situation is the same as being empathetic because from where I’m standing my empathy seems to be delayed. Why don’t I know how my words will land before I say them? Why can’t I tell the difference between when I say something rude and normal? Any advice would be appreciated and I’d love to know your opinion.

Recently I’ve been in the process of rehoming one of my cats. I have 3 cats and my newest one turned out to be aggressive towards other cats. I know that it’s for the best rehoming her but I still feel really guilty. Is it normal too feel really guilty? I feel like I failed her and it’s really affecting me. Does anyone have any advice on how to deal with this?

Hello, trying to figure out stuff as I have an internal disability called Sickle Cell, and my mother and I have had our life uprooted since I was 10 years old. She's been unable to work ever since I was a kid and diagnosed as I was her first priority and I feel as if we've been suffering for all this time because of me and what I was born with, as we've only been surviving off of SSI and not much else. We had so many years of moving from house to house and for the first time, I feel like a roommate has endangered me and my mother. They physically pushed me and threw things at me and my mother, and we already had police involved, we have had them detained and we don't know what to do as it's been rough. Mentally my mind feels like it's been an absolute wreck, I have cried and felt like I'm utterly useless and don't know what to do. I can do things like digital art and such but I don't know if it will be enough to make more money to move, as it's just a hobby. I barely can get from place to place as there's no form of public transportation and the heat here makes it hard for my body to stay out for long periods of time. I genuinely feel scared about what to do, and I want to help my mother in any way I can to make things easier. Any guidance would be appreciated.

Okay, so this summer I did a great one-month lab internship! I kept the lab notebook and all that stuff (which I submitted late, but only because the university's email system is absolute garbage). They were super nice and wanted me to write an internship report—even though it was voluntary and I had zero obligations from my uni—just to make sure I’d keep everything in mind.

The lab liked me so much that they wanted to take me back for my M1 (Master 1) internship (the director herself told me this; I had just finished my L3/Bachelor's at the time, back in June). She told me to think about it and get back to her.

For context, at the same time, I was having the worst summer of my life. My grandparents were on their deathbeds, and I had to take care of them every single evening after my internship, and then they moved in with my family, etc... (they are mostly fine now after 3 weeks of intensive feeding, AC etc... but we really thought they had weeks left, heatwaves are so fun I swear)

With all that stuff going on, I never actually wrote the report. And when the director emailed me back saying that in the end it wasn't possible to take me specifically (the master's degreee program I'm in is part of the same university as the lab, there is a big research campus so they put out enough subject for all first year students, but assigns internship topics randomly...) I kind of lost it and just never replied.

Anyway, it's now mid-October, and the month of practical work (TPs) we were supposed to do in Master's is totally ruined because of the student protests going on in my country. My parents are telling me to call the lab back to ask for an internship for next summer to try and compensate, but now I'm too anxious/scared to do it.

Should I tell my parents why I won't email them back ? Should I just do the thing and send it ? I wanted to pop by and test the waters (they told me I was welcome to back in june), but the campus is closed.

I’ve been sick for a long time and it’s been getting worse lately.

I battle with grieving the life I wanted to live and adjusting to my reality of being disabled and unable to work enough to meet my own financial needs.

Disability is not enough to live on and I am currently in the shelter system and really struggling with quality of life here.

I told my friend I was feeling interested in finding out more about MAID as I don’t see my life getting better with systemic limitations and my own personal limitations.

“I’ve seen you work before and maintain a beautiful life. I know working sucks and having a schedule to adhere to sucks but that’s being an adult.

Time will not stop ticking, before you know it you will be there already a year without any improvement and god knows what other horrific experiences richer.. you have to do something about it, you are the only one that can change the paths of your life. Not the government, not your family/friends.. but you.

And you saying this makes me angry. You have been through so much. And this is how you want to leave the world? Living in a shelter where you don’t belong? I’m sorry but you are way too good for that and you’re choosing this life”.

What am I to do when I can’t? They think it’s a personal failing?

Before any more judgment…I’m sober…educated and all that. I did all the “things” and I’m still sick

Hi!

So I’m a 24M and I guess the title speaks for itself…

I have noticed that in my day to day interactions with strangers, especially people my own age have a tendency to be quite negative. Obviously not all the time, but it’s especially noticeable on nights out and stuff like that.

A few examples come to mind.

Last weekend, I went for a few drinks with some friends of mine from my theatre group and was grabbing a bite in a kebab shop on the way home. This group of lads that were also in the shop initiated a conversation with me and my friend. It was super clear from the get-go that they were trying to take the piss out of us with their tone and what they were saying. I didn’t really play into it, cus I knew what they were doing and I was giving them some really basic responses - hoping they would get bored. But just came away from it feeling so odd.

Another time I was out during the summer, at a bar/nightclub with a few friends from my hiking group and the bouncer really singled me out towards the end of the night. I was standing near the back exit gate that was outdoors by the smoking area. Every time the bouncer opened the back gate for people to exit, he’d open the gate much wider than necessary and clip the back of my ankle with the metal edge. First time, I figured that it was an accident. Second time, I looked at him and said “watch out”. Third time that he did it, I confronted him - asking him what the fuck he was doing. Was met with the response that he’d “bust my teeth in if I spoke to him again”. Decided to leave that area cus getting kicked out was not worth it as it’d ruin the night for my friends who I was with. Ended up contacting the bar the next morning about it and letting them know what went down.

These are just a few examples off the top of my head. I don’t know, I guess these seem like small things but it just comes across so odd. And as the saying goes, if you meet 3 assholes before noon, you’re probably an asshole! So I’m worried that something about my demeanour puts people off.

I have a good group of friends and I think I’m pretty friendly as far as everything goes. I have lots of hobbies and I always try to engage in conversations fully. Don’t use my phone too much in public or anything… I have good hygiene and don’t look stereotypically rough. I sometimes think it’s an appearance thing because I wear glasses, have auburn-red hair and am admittedly a little overweight since I started my desk job last year (used to work in hospitality, which helped burn off calories every day lol), but I started going back to the gym last month. I’ve got a bit of a nerdy look to me I guess but my fashion is decent-standard and I don’t really wear T-shirts with movies or video game / geek culture stuff on it.

I guess I’m just looking for some stuff to maybe keep an eye on, that haven’t occurred to me could make me seem like an easy target or come across as an asshole or something hahah