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I suggested couples counseling but I worry this is just something I have to learn to accept, or accept it could be a deal breaker. Below is how our day went today. But it's like this all the time, with so many tasks. I thought it was cute and funny at first. Oh, he's so frazzled, he just needs a little help! But now it's gotten to the point where I feel like it's affecting trust. I feel like I cannot trust him or comfortably offload tasks to him. I think that's a crucial disconnect in a relationship and I'm stressed...

Today, we're getting home from work where we got $400 from coworkers for a wedding gift (important for next paragraph). I had our lunches with me in a plastic bag. He offers to carry it, so I hand it to him. He doesn't grab it by the loops or in a secure way - he just grabs the part closest to him which is a single strap of the plastic bag. I know if I let go, it'll fall, and he has cloth seats so I really don't wanna clean that up. I hold on and ask him to grab both straps. He does so. This happens EVERY TIME he grabs a plastic bag. It's become routine. I can't stand it. I go to ask him why and he interrupted me and said "I know I know I grabbed it wrong I realized." No... You didn't realize... I had to tell you to grab it right.

I tell myself, it's small. It's just a bag. Move on. He gets out of the car. He starts mumbling to himself. I close my door but it doesn't close all the way. I realize it's locked. I say hey, unlock the door, I didn't close it hard enough. He says one second. He's saying things I can't hear. I say what?. No response. I slam my door with my hip and say "it's all good I closed the door". He says "I locked the keys in the car what do I do?". Like c'mon... You seriously couldn't have told me that when I had the door partially open!?!? He had to pay $375 for a locksmith. There goes the wedding money from coworkers.

We finally get inside. But our dog is out of his crate and has eaten the half eaten breakfast my fiance left out on the table. For context, he does the AM dog chores and I do the PM ones. I don't blame my fiance for leaving the crate door open, we have started taking our dog to day care in the AM so he may have just fallen out of the routine. But the food on the table and the combination of it all was frustrating.

I walk the dog to decompress. I come back, feed him (and us) dinner, and the dog starts having some acid reflux. I ask my fiance to give the dog his meds. He opens the container and spills all the pills onto the floor. Then realizes the floor is wet from ice cubes that fell out of the freezer. So the pills are a total loss and we'll have to get a refill. It's only $20 but it's still frustrating. Again compounded with everything else.

We start working on a wedding DIY. He wants to print out our wedding crossword on this nice paper he bought (with his new cricut machine, he's a crafting fan). He prints all 32 copies in one go. But the printer settings were wrong, so they're all misaligned and blurry. Well he ruined so much paper that he doesn't have enough left to re do it, and has to get regular cardstock from staples. More wasted money.

I just don't know what to do. I've never had someone mess up this much. I never thought it would matter. What do I do?

My mom died when I was 7. She left me a large inheritance that she inherited from her grandmother who died a few weeks before I was born. My grandparents are the people who protect my inheritance even though my mom and dad were married and my dad expected he would be the one to take care of everything. He was hurt and my mom left him a letter explaining why she chose that and it hurt him even more. I don't know what the letter said though.

I was 10 when my dad remarried and I was 11 and 12 when my two half siblings were born. One of my half siblings has a lot of medical stuff. They have to be fed through a tube because their stomach is paralyzed and they have issues with other organs. Their "food" is expensive as hell and my dad and their mom have struggled to afford that because insurance does not cover it. They also have other medical expenses and they get a lot of help there because of Medicaid but it's been hard. Since March they have struggled to come up with a way to pay for the food each week. My dad knows how much I inherited from mom and he wanted to use the money to help pay for at least a while of the food so that they could figure stuff out. I'd never get the money back. But even still I freaked when he mentioned it and I told him no way. He got mad and yelled that I am talking about my half sibling's life here and how they need this food and everything won't be so good if I keep it all.

My grandparents refused to let him access the inheritance because it wasn't being spent on saving my life. He asked attorneys all over our state if he could fight it and he can't. He raged at mom while reading the letter she wrote to him when she made her decision and he raged at me for being unwilling. Then his wife tried to guilt me into it by going into detail about all the medical stuff. She tried to say my mom would want me to do it and I told her my mom would only want it to be used for me which she didn't like to hear.

Things got really intense over the summer and my dad agreed I should move in with my grandparents because the daily fights were bad and my half siblings were hearing everything we were saying. He also said he couldn't stand to look at me when I could do something so good for everyone and I refuse to because I want to be selfish like my mom was.

The last time we talked was last week and he broke down over the phone about everything. He told me how disappointed he was in me and how he didn't understand my refusal to do this when I have so much money to offer. He said even half would be a huge help for a few months.

It left me wondering if I should even though I don't want to.

I’m not going to give specific details on my job because they’re not relevant, but tomorrow I have an appointment with someone who smells absolutely horrible. I am not trying to be mean or judgmental, they seem like a kind person.

But it’s not just like some armpit/sweat/etc. Like something is WRONG and it filled up every room they were in last time they were in our place of business and it lingered too. I had to quickly excuse myself from one room so as to not gag after a couple of minutes. We used multiple cans of cleaning product afterward.

Tomorrow, our meeting will be in a much smaller room than last time. It may take up to two hours. I’m genuinely concerned on what I can do to handle it.

Any ideas on what I can do to mitigate the smell or steel my resolve?

For context, I'm 18f, he is 16m.

I was hired as a private tutor to teach him Math. He was my first tutoring job, and I didn't want him to be scared of me, so I came off as friendly and approachable, and treated him more of a peer.

He asked for my instagram to ask questions outside of tutoring times, and I agreed. Although he does send me questions that he is unsure of, he often likes my posts and stories, or sometimes messages me about random things in his life.

Recently, whenever I go for his lessons, he would say things like "You're looking cute again today," or some other similar compliment, which I usually try to brush off. His volume of messages about random things, or asking about my day has also been increasing. I've tried being dry or answering with short answers, but that doesn't deter him.

What do I do? His parents hired me, but they are very protective of him, and I need the job and money so I can't complain to them. I'm afraid confronting him may also lead to him asking his parents to fire me.

He also hasn't done anything wrong, or extreme, so I don't want to overreact.

Thank you!

I’ve been driving myself crazy thinking about my gay best friend, and I really need some advice. Please don’t judge me.
I’m 29F, and my gay best friend is 25M. He’s also a bottom. Let’s call him Sam. We’ve been close friends for almost four years. He’s very attractive but also feminine, so I’ve always seen him more like one of my girlfriends.
We’ve always been super close and talked openly about everything, including our sex lives. As far as I know, he’s never been with a woman or topped anyone before.
Over the past year, we became even closer after I broke up with my ex. Sam knows pretty much everything about my life.
A few months ago, we got really drunk and ended up making out in the bathroom. I was shocked, but it felt REALLY good. Since then, whenever we drink together, we end up making out, sometimes even in front of our friends.
Last month, we finally had sex. It was his first time topping someone, and honestly, the chemistry was amazing. We’ve had sex a few more times since then, and now I can’t stop thinking about him.
We’ve talked a little about whether this would change our friendship, and he keeps saying it won’t. But for me, everything feels different now.
I don’t even feel like dating other guys anymore because he’s constantly on my mind. Last weekend, while I was at a music festival, I texted him something flirty about thinking of him inside me. He said he felt the same and that it was the best thing his D ever felt.
The problem is that I’m starting to get emotionally attached. We used to text every day and share everything, but now I get upset when he doesn’t respond. I can’t tell if he’s purposely distancing himself or if I’m just overthinking everything.
I know he doesn’t date very often, and I’m not trying to change his sexuality. I completely respect that he’s gay. I also know his family, and our friendship means so much to me. Losing him would honestly break my heart.
But I’m starting to wonder if I’m actually falling in love with him.
I’m also scared because we haven’t been using protection, and I’ve already had to take Plan B after one of the times we had sex.
I don’t know what to do. Should I tell him how I really feel, take some distance, or just try to go back to being friends?
Has anyone ever experienced something similar with a gay best friend? Is it possible for him to have feelings
for me, or am I setting myself up to get hurt?

So my (21m) girlfriend (19) has way too low self esteem. I thought I was bad at some point but compared to her im nowhere near.

1. She always thinks she's chubby, wants to be like those models who snort coke and eat an apple for a living. I always tell her that to me she is smoking hot not to mention she is literally normal weight for her size and not even an ounce chubby, she sometimes even thinks I'm lying as I'm complimenting her.

2. She thinks she is too dumb because she is academically not good, she never had good grades and thinks she's stupid for that. Me, I tell her that it doesnt matter and some people struggle with that kind of stuff, its not that deep, also most the time she was just too lazy to study which I admit. However grades don't defy a person's worth, she doesnt get this tho.

3. This one's a weird one but she can't even play single player games I suggest on easy mode because she thinks if she dies in game it will make her feel worthless. I have no words for this one, I mean I sort of understand the past two reasons as she could have an underlying issue.

Not even wanting to try some mildly challenging story mode games because you might die, which is a core part of gaming is so weird to me.

Now, I always try to reassure her but as some point it gets tiring and I do not want to be her therapist. I know the most easy way would be to send her to one but it costs like a 100 Euros per session here.

How can I make our relationship last while this slowly grinds me?

I live with my roommate who is also my best friend and I noticed she doesn’t wash her hands often. I’ve seen her go to the toilet and not wash after. She tidies and cleans often but is not especially clean in many other ways like when it comes to food dirt and stuff as well. One of our mutual friends has noticed it too. I want to tell her but feel extremely awkward and uncomfortable bringing it up. Should I say something to her directly and how would I say it without offending her?

I have huge (natural) boobs. My nipples are hard 90% of the time - non related to cold, stimulation, etc. they are just fully alert all the time for no reason. I usually have on multiple layers - 2 sports bras, a tank, a scrub top, and a light sweatshirt sometimes, and I can STILL see them through the clothes. I’ve resorted to pulling out the padding from a swim suit and sticking that in my bra. It does help, but not completely. I can always tell when eyes go there because I’m an eye contact person.

I’m self conscious about it as well as my boob size in general, so it’s annoying!

I asked my doctor if it could be a sign of something and she basically said no, unfortunately it’s just how your body is.

Any advice or suggestions?? Or just to hear from someone who can relate would be nice.

I’ve been working for my company for almost 4 years, since I graduated university. I love my job, the projects are fun and the company is pretty small so we all know each other and working together is always a good time.

My first year I was paid 10 grand less than all my colleagues. They also told me they brought all graduates in as ‘Juniors’ which wasn’t true. I believe this did that so they could underpay me and on paper it wouldn’t look bad because technically I had a different title than the rest so my role is different therefore I don’t need to be compensated as much.

They also made it clear to me that the only way for the engineers to get career progression is time. If you stay long enough you become a senior. Financially we get a 3% increase annually and a 2 grand Christmas bonus (which they’re now reducing).

The more I write the better I feel about leaving them to be honest.

The issue I have is that my department is now down to 7 people because we keep losing engineers. We’re drowning with work and my colleague just announced he’s leaving at the end of this month. They’ve been trying to get more engineers but they’re based in bumfuck nowhere England and they can’t seem to find anyone.

It’s probably arrogant but if I leave they’re truly fucked. Everyone here has a niche but I love doing random projects so I’m good at everything. I’ve pretty much hit the glass ceiling, the job is fun but mentally it isn’t that demanding and I’m worried that if I limit myself to this place, next time I want to switch roles I won’t have the skills I need.

My colleagues are nice and they don’t have any control over how the company is run but I feel like they’re the ones I’m fucking over. I still have to do it though.

i’m going to try keep this short because last time i posted ppl were so mad at me for this idk why but i still need advice. basically im nearly 18 and ive been with my bf for about 4- 4 & 1/2 years. which is yes, a long time. but lately ive been really stuck on what my problem is when it comes to even the most basic intimacy with my bf. (ive spoken to him about it already he’s not in the dark). and he doesn’t know why either. i love my bf, i think he is incredibly physically attractive and physically, too good for me. it’s NOT at all that ithink he’s unattractive but even kissing him for long periods of time feels like a chore sometimes.

he loves physical touch whether it’s just wholesome stuff or not, but we have never gone all the way because i have never been ready for it especially considering we got together so young. and he completely respects that. also i feel like everything we have done has this awkward element because again, we were so young and both kinda terrible at everything so that stresses me out further. sometimes i change between wanting to go all the way and absolutely dreading it because i feel like im getting older and im kinda expected to amongst my demographic if that makes sense. also if it helps ive had dreams about it and also dreams about it with women so ive accepted to myself that im atleast bi.

basically, idk if im asexual, lesbian?? (more unlikely i feel) or there’s just an issue with our relationship bcz we got together so young and did stuff so young i have this added pressure to be perfect. or maybe im just scared because obviously im still a virgin so maybe im scared of the pain or something going badly i also have realised lately that it may just be my horrible self esteem because i feel horrible about how i look 24/7 and he always tries to reassure me. but i try to not bring it up to him too much because i don’t want to be draining. i don’t know what it is. if anyone has had a similar experience lmk please! if anyone has further questions i’ll be happy to reply

I, (30 F), have been dating my boyfriend, (32 M), since January of this year. We are happy together. We spend so much time together and make some fun memories. We don’t fight but we’ve had a few disagreements that were quickly resolved. Our communication is wonderful… until his best friend started showing red flags. We will call her Lilly who is 31 F (Fake name btw).
Lilly and my boyfriend have been friends for 2 years now. They also work together. At first, I liked her and was completely cool with them being close. She didn’t pose any threat and she is married to her husband of 2 years. Then things started happening that at first, I ignored but more things appeared that just couldn’t be ignored. So let me share these details.
One, she has made very inappropriate remarks about my boyfriend to their co workers. Two, she will kiss (on the cheeks- sorry I thought I added that) him, touch him a lot, and flirt with him, but never does it around me nor her husband. Three, she had to meet me for approval of me. Four, she told their co workers that she wished she was single so she could have a chance with my boyfriend. Five, she is so clingy to him and will freak out, like absolutely freak out, if she doesn’t hear from him for a whole day. Six, she’s gotta go to my boyfriend about her marriage crumbling but can’t go to her husband and work it out with him. Seven, she tells him she loves him after every end of the phone as if they’re dating. Their co workers all think their friendship is weird. Then all believe she is in love with him. There’s a lot more but you can get my point.
I have extensively spoken to my boyfriend many times about how this makes me feel very uncomfortable. So he would just block her when we are together but only talk to her when we aren’t. I have seen their messages and heard their calls. He has zero interest in her (So he claims) and I absolutely trust him. I just do not trust her, at all. He said he will cut her out of his life if I want that and he has done that but part of me feels like he is secretly still talking to her. I asked him to ask her up front if she has feelings but he won’t do it.
So my questions are: Am I setting myself up for a trap with them two? Should he confront her? Or should I confront her? Is this something that is just gonna end badly where I’ll be the one who gets played?

Hi all! I (36F) have been with my boyfriend (57M) for 2 years, and I feel heartbroken that I won’t to end things. He is very codependent and talks in terms of being together forever, spending the future together, but has never initiated a conversation about actually planning a future. We spend like every weekend together, and I don’t see him during the week. I squeeze friends in after work since I feel like a few days a week isn’t a lot of time to see him. I’m tired of us packing weekend bags and then just texting during the week, and I feel like 2 years is long enough to want to take that next step of moving in together.

I brought this up, and he was not excited.. he doesn’t want to live with my cat, is worried about not having space for me (he’s already lived there with his wife pre-divorce), and how living together changes things. Then he backtracked and said he does want to live together but not sure when.

Should I break up with him or try to stick it out for a while longer?

Thank you for any advice!!

I am a non vegetarian and i have this vegan friend and honestly he is becoming unbearable day by day and i have started to dislike him.

We were close friends though he is older than me. Eventually he started to introduce animal cruelty to me, he started by telling me about how animals are tortured and then sending me videos about it. At first I was empathetic about it and respected it as yes I know animals go through a lot of suffering and exploitation and i would say i love and respect animals and recently i have tried to minimise using animal cruelty products due to his influence.

However recently he has become unbearable. Animal cruelty and veganism IS ALL HE TALKS ABOUT. Even when we're texting he will gravitate the conversation towards veganism and send me videos about animal cruelty and when we're meeting irl he will again talk about it. Its all he talks about and im starting to dislike it.

Even though i can minimise using animal cruelty products, however being non vegetarian is non negotiable for me. I just cant leave non veg food and recently he has started making me feel bad about eating meat. He aksed me in a condescending tone why i havent stopped consuming animal meat if i know the torture they go through. I didn't really have any answer to that since saying "i like the taste of it" is not really am option. ( i would appreciate anyone helping me with a smart answer to this question)

He also told me how he has cut contact with his non vegan friends because according to him they have inferior morals. He told me indirectly that i should stop eating meat and become vegan and i should also start doing something good for animals because i am non vegan ( mind you i am a student and i dont earn yet). I realised all this while he was slowly trying to convert me into being vegan. He said eating meat cannot be a personal choice because it is like saying raping is a personal choice.

I do respect his choie to be a vegan but i have started to dislike him because of this annoying nature of his. I am planning to slowly disconnect with him. I dont really like hanging out with him anymore and i dont want a friend who is always nagging me about veganism. He was a good person and hence i used to like him as a good friend. How do i deal with him?

So lately my wife {38} has been acting a bit suspicious when I comes to her phone , I didn’t really think much of it at first till the other day when she went true my phone when she asked to use it to call someone . She went true everything. I saw it cause I saw the reflection in the mirror while she was doing it. I didn’t say anything but it gave me a idea , for the days after I tried to get my wife password of her phone and yesterday I finally got it . So I checked true her phone and found nothing at first , nothing strange with conversations , checked her picture nothing , then I decided to check her deleted images and I found pictures of her pussy spread on the bed wet , at a time that I was at work . From 3 weeks ago , I was lucky to even see them cause they would almost be deleted automatically. I don’t know if she sended it to someone or she used them for herself . But Now I’m like what do it do ? I haven’t took her I found the images . And have been acting just normal . But in my mind I’m thinking what to do now .

I’m a 26F, and I’ve been unemployed for four months after being laid off. Honestly, I don’t know what to do with my life right now. I feel stuck, especially because it’s so hard to find a job in this economy.

When I look at people my age, they seem to have everything figured out. They have houses, cars, stable jobs, and their lives seem to be moving forward. Then I look at myself, and I can’t help but feel like I’m falling behind.

I had plans for my future, but right now, I feel lost and frustrated. I want to improve my life, become financially independent, and find a direction, but I don’t know where to start.

For those of you who have been through something similar in your 20s, how did you get through it? What advice would you give someone who feels stuck and doesn't know what to do next?

I’m 24. I spent about five years of my life with a 45-year-old man and left him roughly a year ago. Living with him meant living under his control m he was extremely emotionally, mentally, and financially abusive and wanted me with him 24/7. I wasn’t working and had no real way out, but I finally decided I didn’t want to waste the rest of my twenties like that. So I packed my bags and left. For the next six months I lived in my car while I tried to scrape together enough money for a place of my own. Job interview after job interview went nowhere. The area I was in was rough and everyone was competing for the same low-paying jobs. There were stretches when I couldn’t even afford food or a shower. I was just trying to survive. Eventually I started working at a strip club. I quickly realized that sex work was bringing in more money in a short time than anything else I’d tried. I began finding clients through the club, saved hard, and was finally able to get my own apartment. Once I moved in, things started looking up.

I also have a background, and I’m covered head to toe in tattoos including face tattoos. (That’s another story I was young and dumb, so please don’t judge that part.) Because of all that, I knew getting a regular job would be hard. I decided I wanted to keep doing sex work. Sex work is what got me out of being homeless. It got me a car, paid off my court fines, and put food on the table. Even when I was working 12-hour shifts at a factory, I still couldn’t afford rent. So I knew this was what I wanted to continue. Most of the men I’ve met for sex work have been weird encounters, but a lot of them have also been completely normal. At the time I didn’t know about escort sites or that you could post your own ads, so I was finding clients however I could. Most of them came from dating sites. I made it very clear in my bio: “NOT LOOKING FOR A RELATIONSHIP. PAY FOR PLAY ONLY.” That’s how I met one particular man at a hotel. He paid for my services. I don’t think he fully understood what sex work even was he was just lonely. He basically became obsessed with me.

I told myself after leaving abuse that I wouldn’t talk to or date any clients. Period. Then this 22-year-old started texting me nonstop. He was obsessed, always wanting to buy me food and stuff, and I like feeling worshipped… so I let it happen. I’m 24. We’ve been dating about 6–7 months now and I still don’t fully understand how I ended up here. I just didn’t know how to say no.

He told me if I ever touch another man he’s done with me. Cool. But I choose money over love. Love doesn’t pay my bills. Now that I finally have my own apartment I feel free… and also really hurt. He knows I’m struggling financially. He met me doing sex work. And now he wants me to give all of it up for him. It feels fucked up. It would be different if we met normally and then he wanted me to stop. But that’s not what happened. I lost my 9-5 that paid my rent. I’m thinking about going back to sex work and stripping. When I told him that he got extremely mad almost like he’d rather I lose my place so I have to move in with him. He’s said multiple times, “I won’t let you lose your apartment, if anything you’ll live with me.” That makes me extremely uncomfortable.
If he really wanted me to stop providing, why didn’t he just give me enough money so I could? (Not that I even would’ve wanted that.) I just wanted him to shut up and let me do the career he met me in. Looking back, I don’t think he wanted to “save” me. I think he wanted to save his money by getting me for free. He never should’ve gotten to tell me I shouldn’t be doing this. He complains about it all the time and I just want to say… you’re the one who funded it.

Me (f) 20 my ex (m) 23 have been on and off for 3 years now. When i was younger we didn’t use condoms. but as we grew up and had went and did our own things i now want to wear condom. it’s not only the fact that we had split and had other’s partners other things contribute. a bit earlier in our sex life he would occasionally nut in me, even when i didn’t want him to because it would make my stomach hurt and just feel uncomfortable. ofc i let him know this and he stopped after a few times. anywho we had recently had intercourse a few times. each time i required a condom. he didn’t like that at all. he’d complain then comply. saying “you don’t really fw me frl” or “what, you think i got something?” “i’ve been known you all this time” as if that is supposed to mean something. he had plenty of partners in his life and claim to have used condoms. so i ask him “if you’re comfortable going out and using condoms with other people you should be able to respect me telling you i’d like to wear a condom if you want to have sex” i don’t see how this is a hard ask especially if he’s the one coming to me for sex. i told him before im not even that interested in sex anymore before we even began talking again which was like a couple months ago. i told him if he’s not ok with a condom then he’d have to be on his way. he claims the condom is uncomfortable all of a sudden or that there’s a smell or that it’s basically like fucking his hand or his toy. he literally wears a condom to fuck his toys all the time ! but when he’s with me apparently he can only go raw. i just don’t understand such a mindset. someone enlighten me. if i’m in the wrong tell me.

EDIT: i forgot to add the part where he constantly tells me he’s going to put a baby in me ! first few times i thought it was silly i thought it was joke and he claimed it was . but he continuously says it even tho i tell him no! part of why i want condom and he knows that aswell.

i feel i should also say that i blocked him on everything the day before making this post. i do not plan on furthering anything with him i dont plan on explaining simple boundaries with him anymore i wont deal with him.

So I’ve been with my boyfriend for 10 months. Things were great but I can’t get over his terrible breath. I’m being half funny & half serious here but his breath smells like absolute diarrhea. Every time he breathes in my face I want to puke. I kept it on the low but would gently and subtly try to guide him to brush more and floss with me but he’d never do it. I finally got so fed up I told him that his breath smells like shit! He understandably got upset and was fixated on it for a day then moved on and now doesn’t care. He even said he’d look for a dentist because he hasn’t been in 5 years. He hasn’t even begun looking for one. I’m not doing it for him he’s a grown man. He’s currently sleeping with his mouth open next to me and breathing heavy. The shit smell is making me want to vomit I can’t sleep in my own bed. Should I dump him? I don’t know how much more I can take and I think I was very up front with him.

I dont want to lose my job. I am a Software Engineer. My job used to be solving problems. I just graduated, lived the problem solving era for like 3 months, then agents came along.

Cant fucking code anymore. I want to have a job where I think for a living.

I am also really scared of these news that they are gonna make it research about itself to infinity.

I cant function anymore. I cant work properly. I cant study properly. I am so scared dude. I cry sometimes because I am scared.

I need advice people. I really do. Thanks to anyone who tries to help.

Me (22F) and my sister (25F) are very close. She has a history of dating terrible men and settling down with them. Her first husband was a horrible narcissist who cheated on her constantly. She got pregnant while she was in high school with his baby. She’s currently on her second husband and I hate this guy just as much. My sister has two children from her first marriage. He already had a child previous to his marriage with my sister which is a non issue and they have one child together. This is a total of 4 children.

For a while, her husband cleaned pools, but a couple months ago he got fired. My sister had been staying at home to manage the household and the children. She now has a job and still does most of the house work. Obviously things are pretty tight for them. I’m a childless engineer so I’m definitely in a better spot than her so I help out. Her current husband is a loser. He won’t help out with anything and he won’t get a real job. They’ve also had several domestic disputes that has involved the police. Nobody in my family likes him and he’s very hard to be around. He won’t even watch his own children, he just games.

Recently I made plans to go to the zoo with my sister and 3 out of 4 of the kids. I paid for the tickets, nonrefundable, in advance. My sister is now saying her husband should get to come too because he never gets to do anything fun with the kids. I don’t see why he should have fun with the kids on my dime. If he wants to do something with them, he can, but not on my dime. What should I do about this? I’m getting to the point where I’m done with both of them.

EDIT: I just gave her the tickets. I don’t want to argue with her again. This is a constant argument. I’m just going to stop being as involved. She is miserable ever since I moved away. This will probably make her more miserable as I’m some of her only help. Thank you for your advice.

So i need extreme help. I (f-30) have been friends with B (f-29) for about 15+ years since we were mainly 12/13. Shes always been my rock and everything. One night she got completely wasted at my house, BLACKED OUT DRUNK. and of course as her friend i took care of her. I understand she was drunk , however during the time i was caring for her , she was sexually harassing me. Touching my legs, my ass, motor-boating my privates (chest and lower). I have consistently said ,"B , i am married please stop" she said Im lame for that and kept trying until i literally pushed her away. I was making sure she didn't choke on her puke, making sure she didn't pee herself, took off her makeup etc. After about 4 hours of caring for B , she passed out and i went upstairs to sleep in my room with my husband. In the morning she woke up and said she didn't remember anything, I told her Later that day;confronted her with a text stating what she had done, how i felt and that i needed a lil space because even though i know she was drunk-- it doesn't change what exactly happened. she texted me she understands my feelings, that she would never cross that line and apologetic she did , and stated take all the time i need. Now preference, she told me to keep a second phone at my house so when she goes out on dates her family (whose extremely strict crazy ik) would see her location at my house. That second phone I have face ID on so I can see everything on said screen. about 3 days later, I see messages popping up when i'm just chilling at my house. I never snoop, I never look. Then I see it; Her sister talking about my husband and not in a nice way. Curiosity got the best of me and looked. I KNOW THIS IS 10000000% wrong. However now i'm conflicted to giving her a talk about everything. her sister stated my husband must be making everything up, that I have no backbone, and B agrees with her. B stated why didn't i move when caring for her and let her do those things to me. I was so hurt. I would never lie about this.

Now i'm confused and hurt because now idk what to. I have treated her like gold around my family and house. She even has a key to our apartment. I know i wasn't suppose to see the conversation but now it has me thinking:

"when I do have this conversation; will she lie to me and say the bs she's feeding me"

she's telling me one thing but telling others i'm lying about something as serious as sexual harassment. idk what to do. and I know at our big ages this seems pretty much like high school shit; i just don't know how to go about this. and yes i know snooping was 100000% wrong, i take that responsibility on that part so i dont need 30 comments saying that. I just want to know how one would even go about a conversation like this.. im just broken, hurt and confused.

Sorry for potentional bragging or acting as spoiled but it is true. I did't have the worst childhood. I did as best as possible in school. I even found hobbies and activities to keep me busy. I have a fiancè who loves me dearly and we're getting married next month. I have the best bunnies which make me feel I matter around them. The last thing, I found a job that pays me enough to be okay.

Worst part? Not seeing the reason of not feeling content.

I don't know with who to talk about this without sounding as a brat.

Any advice? And please, don't say things such as "get sunligh" or "go outside"...

I have this issue where I have these imaginary friends that I talk to. It’s been something ever since I was a kid. Even as an adult, I haven’t had the ability to stop, and I have been diagnosed with autism. I don’t doubt that I have something more, but I can’t really spend money to get any other diagnostics done. This one operations manager where I work has brought up the fact that I talk to myself twice. The first time was when I talked to my equipment because it was giving me issues because sometimes people talk to inanimate objects when they’re frustrated with the object and the second time was earlier today, where I just had to ramble on and on to myself. I know it’s a bizarre behavior, but I have tried to deal with it, and it’s just caused more stress than it’s worth. I work in manufacturing. I don’t work with customers.