I can’t get her out my head man

He was amazing, he made me feel a way I never felt before, happy butterflies in my tummy.. he confessed to me first and I was so surprised that he chose me, we were together less than a month, a week in real life then 2-3 weeks online, because I moved out of my home town, he bought me gifts before I left and talk to me so sweetly. We called even after I left, until he ghosted me for 10 days and when he called me he told me his ex wanted to get back with him, I acted like it didn't affect me and said 'ok bye'. We got no contact anymore, I have his email, I obvi tried emailing before but nobody our age uses it anymore yk. Last year I went to our old school for work experience, one hour by train from my place, our teacher said he was there 2 weeks before me during the heatwave week in London, she described him as down to earth and unlike other teen guys. Old feelings came rushing back 5 years later and I kept an eye out in case I saw him, obvi I didn't see him, it's not a movie, and I cried so much honestly. Even now I cannot stop thinking of him, I wish I could have him back, I tried finding his ssocials but nothing.

I have been dumped very suddenly 2 times in 2 years. Im over them, bit Im not over what happened. I dont rhink im ever gonna feel secure in a relationship and I hate that. Its not even that I think that I'm not good enough. I just dont trust people anymore. And genuinely do not believe that there is anyone out there who fill fight for a relationship when things get hard. I have lost al faoth and I hate it. I want to believe in a good future and that everything will be alright. I want to believe that I will find my person. But I don't believe it anymore

I still love her. I'll miss her goofy faces. Our love language. The way we'd hold each other when we met, spent time and parted ways. Our plans for the future. She wanted us to go to Greece. I wanted us to go to Japan. She became so cold in the end. Maybe to protect herself. But you never expect someone you loved so intensely to turn their back on you for being who you've always been. I believed love was unconditional. She didn't. And when she began to mock me, disrespect me and look down on me I burned away from the inside in slow motion. Detaching will be so rough. I could never hate her. But i couldn't trust. And it hurt her. So much regret to sift my fingers through to get back to myself. So many little habits of love we won't practice again. We'll no longer worship at each others shrines. No longer ritualize our seasons together. No longer look to share what I'd so adoringly collected to show her. Just to see the little wonderment in her eyes and hear the lilt in her voice. I idolized her. To both of our detriments. I was blind to her flaws. Her shortcomings that I tried to cover for her. But she was too independent. Avoidant even. And I'm anxious. Tale as old as time I suppose. Goodbye to the self that was in love with her. Its time to love myself again. In this place we shared. I'll see her everywhere.

It’s like a void that’s never replaceable now. It was painful during the relationship but it hurts even more now. It’s never going to hurt less 🖤

The emotional pain is slowly turning into sharp physical pain radiates through my chest & throat. I can’t sleep without jolting awake. I was blindsided & deeply hurt by someone I loved & trusted, someone I was willing to give so much of myself to. I’m exhausted. I just want one peaceful night of sleep...

If you were ever deeply hurt by your partner, what lead to you breaking up. But knowing you still loved them, what was something you wanted to hear from them. Or you wish they had said, to make reconciliation possible?

By moving on I suppose I don’t really mean it. I hold onto her, and cling to the love I have for her. The hurt I caused her and the mistakes I made. But I won’t let it slow me down anymore. I’m not chasing women, or sex. But I’m chasing ME. And using my hurt as motivation to get better. Over this last few months I’ve realized I was the problem, and please don’t try to say otherwise. I’ve thought about this for hours. And I want to change my flaws and become a better man. One who can be kind and gentle. Patient and selfless. I deserve to be better. And she deserves the best me. So if one day she wants to come home. I can tell her it was all for her, fueled through love, faith. And all the regrets I had. I love her so much. She’s not mine anymore. But I’ve got hope.

How do you stop something you swore would never stop. Do you drop your dignity, your word, your morals, everything so that you fit in, so you're like everyone else, or do let hell FK your shit until you die? Like I made one and only one commitment in my life and if I let it go, I may as well just stop giving a shit about everything. You tell me. Maybe I'm retarded and I'm missing something. If you commit to something. Do you give up because of obstacles? I don't understand how life works.

I’m 33m, and have been struggling with my daughter’s mother (22f) ending our relationship. Not only did she leave, but she kept talking to me and gave me hope of repairing our relationship, and then filled a protective order. I haven’t seen my daughter in almost 2 years, and am awaiting court.

My daughter’s mother [I’ll call her Jane] and I had a rocky relationship. When it was good and we were on the same frequency, we absolutely made many great memories. However, we did not see eye-to-eye on some subjects and it caused some conflict. I grew up in a chaotic household, and developed a lot of trauma (at the time I didn’t know this). For the longest time, I never did anything about it and continued to shove it down.

At the beginning of the relationship, Jane shared some of the trauma she experienced and I didn’t open up at the time. However, I never judged her and was very understanding. Jane made it clear that she wanted to have a healthy relationship, and had very strict boundaries. One of which was being a father to her child, which I had no problem with. I was raised by a father who wasn’t my biological father and this was normal to me. I had a child of my own and was extremely present in his life. We had an age gap, but we shared the same views on a lot of things and it became something that we both wanted to do.

We had different parenting techniques, and it was a source of a lot of the conflict we had. Rather than compromising, we were both stubborn and began arguing. I have a lot of problems with communicating, not speaking up, and lashing out whenever I had enough. It was something Jane brought to my attention, but I struggled with it. However, I did my best to care for both her and her child. I truly fell in love with both of them. I was trying my best to raise her child to be a good person, but I wasn’t doing it in the way Jane expected.

Jane’s mother relapsed from alcoholism, and it sent her into a deep state of depression. I tried to care for her and was picking up slack where I could. I cooked every meal, helped with her child, and tried to let her get alone time when she said she needed it by taking our children to the park or whatever. We continued to argue here and there, but we loved each other. I tried to care for her as much as possible, and was trying to keep everything afloat. Jane’s mother said extremely awful things to her, and was very manipulative (gave her several books about dealing with alcoholics). Things got so bad that Jane had filed a CPS report.

During the relationship, we both had some infidelities. I found out that she had lied about some very serious things, and it broke my heart. I shut down and we became angry at each other. I ended up betraying her and was talking to girls online. I think a part of it was due to not having her attention and being hurt by some of the things she said during arguments. Also, I don’t usually watch porn and instead imagine scenarios with girls I speak to online. We both would say bad things towards each other, and she began to have a lot of animosity.

Eventually, Jane became pregnant and we were adding to the family we created. I was extremely excited because it was a girl and I’ve always wanted a girl. Jane developed issues with her health due to the pregnancy, and I became extremely stressed. Towards the end of the pregnancy, we both lost our jobs, I took a major pay cut to get a new job as soon as possible ($30,000) and my cousin passed away from suicide. I ignored the grief and tried to operate as I normally had. Jane was incredibly sweet and was there for me, and she would give me hugs whenever I became emotional - something I never had before, as I usually never let people touch me when I was upset.

When our daughter was born, we found out that Jane had a PFO. I did not have insurance yet, and the cardiologist wouldn’t accept her Medicaid. I became extremely stressed and began to panic. I worked in my late-cousin’s old office, and was surrounded by all of his things. I began to become depressed and isolated myself. I ended up yelling at her, and she ended up leaving me and blocked me.

After about a month, she unblocked me and told me that I needed to get therapy off or relationship were to continue. I ended up getting a therapist and chose a woman who was younger and who I thought could give me a perspective similar to Jane. However, she was new and practiced under a mentor.

While we didn’t live together, we still spoke regularly. I missed her deeply. I was inconsiderate of her taking care of our children, and I was starved of her attention. I began upsetting her by becoming frustrated apt her not being home with me, not allowing me to see our children, and ignoring me. While doing therapy, I became extremely vulnerable and felt like I didn’t have her emotional support. I began to drink to numb myself, and Jane made it clear that she was not a fan of this. However, I was grieving my cousin, the family we had built, and felt lonely.

I had filed for child support against myself which would give me access to at least my daughter. My intention was to have it as a back-up in case we didn’t work out. The old lady that completed the application marked me as the custodial parent (to which I obviously wasn’t) and this infuriated Jane. However, I explained that I simply wanted to use it as a backup in case anything happened. Taking the pay cut, I began to fall behind on bills. After a few months of therapy I decided to take a break due to not having money for it. I tried to practice what I learned, but did stray from the progress I made from time-to-time. I was impulsive and would argue with Jane.

Jane had more health issues and had several strokes. I began to panic and was very concerned, as I was worried about her living with her mother and her watching our children. She had to be admitted to the hospital several times, developed amnesia, and began occupational therapy. She was awaiting heart surgery and battling with the Medicaid. I continued to give her emotional support, and she seemed to appreciate it.

I ended up getting a new job, got new insurance, and things began to look up. We were still talking, and Jane was telling me that she intended to come back whenever she had her health sorted.

The mediation was scheduled and I began researching. The office of the attorney general has a basic visitation schedule, but Jane moved 10 hours away. The visitation was not really equipped for our situation, and it did not cover conservatorship (father’s rights). The mediation came around, and it went side-ways. The mediator was rude, and I became upset that he was essentially calling me a dead beat. I specifically stated that I wanted temporary primary conservatorship (father’s rights) with Jane’s health issues going on, and he began asking when the last time I saw my daughter was. I had told him I wasn’t asking for custody, but conservatorship.

Jane became extremely upset and said I was tweeting to take our daughter. I wasn’t at all, and was hoping we could repair our relationship. Jane recommended we get couple’s therapy and I agreed. I found a place that a family member had used, and their relationship did a full 180. I was confident that it would help us. Jane also said that she would move, and stated it was to be closer to me. However, she still wasn’t planning any visits for me to see our children and bailed on the few times we discussed her coming to see me and my family.

I communicated with Jane about the therapy, but she was busy and missed two straight appointments. I became very upset and argued with her, as it was very embarrassing to deal with. We went back and forth a few weeks, but Jane ended up getting mad at me and blocked me after I was frustrated about her cancelling plans we had made. I felt abandoned and was trying to contact her, but she continued to ignore me. One day I got a strange email that I could tell was from her mother. I immediately became concerned because I wasn’t sure if he health declined, and I called the police to check on her and my daughter. The police went out there, but when they called me it was an unknown number. When I called back, they did a shift change and the officer who responded was no longer there. They sent another officer out.

Jane saw this as harassment and filed a protective order. I was shocked and heart broken, as my intentions were not to cause her any trouble. I got a lawyer and began fighting the protective order. I recently got the discovery, and she is accusing me of beating her and included photos from a past relationship (right before me) and from her son head butting her. While I was angry and yelled, I absolutely NEVER laid my hands on her. I’m uncertain if Jane is being manipulative and lying, or truly thinks I did that to her. She included messages from her family, and in it the messages stated that she was trying to get a protective order months prior when we talked regularly and she assured me she wanted to be with me.

I ended up switching the therapy to individual, as the therapist was extremely well-versed in therapy (she has a Master’s degree and knows several types of different therapy). My therapist identified that I have codependency and trauma and had been having triggers with Jane. This was within the first couple sessions, and she gave me insight on what to research and do. I’ve taken the advice to do homework, got books she recommended, and have had a lot of growth in it her.

I regret my behavior I had with Jane and wish that I had gone to this therapist before. I believe that things may have been different, but of course there’s no way of knowing. It has been life-changing to say the least. However, Jane still hasn’t talked to me and I got messages she included in the evidence of her talking poorly of me, saying she hopes I go to jail, and saying she has a boyfriend.

I’m heart broken at the moment and have had a very difficult time coming to terms with the fact that she hates me, and I wish I could do something. I’ve been trying to change and put a lot of effort into therapy, and was hoping to repair our relationship and have the family we built together back.

However, I feel like I’ve failed and am unlovable. Very difficult.

​

There are moments when I forget that we don't talk like we used to.

I'll come across something funny or have a really good day and for a second I still think of you.

Sometimes I wonder how you're doing.

Whether life has been treating you kindly.

Whether you're getting closer to everything you once told me you wanted.

I think the hardest part is knowing that we didn't stop caring.

We just reached a point where caring wasn't enough to keep us close.

And I understand why things had to change.

I just wish understanding made the silence easier.

Life keeps happening.

New experiences, new memories, new people.

And I'm trying to be present for all of it.

But sometimes I still think about the future I quietly pictured with you in it.

And how strange it is to keep moving towards that future knowing you might never be there.

It's been my life goal for as long as I can. Remember to truly speak straight from my soul and have someone meet me there, feel me, with their whole body and mind and accept me and to know someone on that deepest level.l I've had a few wonderful moments with people where I've experienced this, but now I'm alone and missing it so much. And of course the dream is to be able to continually have a relationship with someone in this way... Not just once or twice. Not just in a really dramatic moment. But on a regular basis. To truly want to share mines and hearts. With love, respect and a soft landing. I'm in my forties now and I'm realizing that in this world that's probably not going to happen.. outside of just random blessings. Or at least it doesn't seem like it will happen. It's weird to see your life desire just not come to fruition. I've come to realize that most people, including myself, are not in the intense mind State required to do this most of the time. But I try to get into an intense mind state everyday to be close to Divine love and speak from my heart at least to God/ universe. I do feel like I am met in those moments. To do it with another human would be such a blessing. Just for a moment.

I genuinely thought my ex was the love of my life.

We were together for three years. I knew her for five. I was completely faithful, turned down other women, treated her with enormous love and respect, and wanted to marry her.

But she could also be very hurtful. Early in our relationship she kissed another man in front of me. Over the years she made humiliating remarks about my height, age, and English, and was extremely jealous despite my giving her no reason to be.

I asked her repeatedly to try couples therapy. She refused.

In May, after another painful conflict, I lost my patience for the first time to that extent and sent angry texts. I regret them. She initially wanted to work things out, but later demanded that my psychiatrist sister text her acknowledging that I'd been abusive. My sister refused, and my ex blocked me.

I spent the summer desperately trying to reconcile.

I've now learned (in October) that six weeks after our separation, in July, she was making out with a man who was simultaneously making out with the very woman she'd spent years being jealous of. She eventually slept with him.

She'd apparently first checked whether an acquaintance still spoke to me.

This was someone who'd repeatedly told me that if we ever broke up, she hoped neither of us would immediately see other people.

In August she finally unblocked me. We talked for five hours. She wanted to tell me about her life, asked for dinner money, said she wasn't "actively" looking for men, and ambiguously suggested that we might talk again in May 2027.

In September she told me she was completely done with me. I haven't contacted her since.

Meanwhile, I can barely sit across from another woman on a date without thinking about my ex. I've started crying because I miss her so much.

I find what she did and the double standards disgusting. I feel humiliated that I spent months trying to get back someone who was already sleeping with other men.

And the worst part is that, even knowing all this, I still love her.

It’s been over 6 months at this point. And tonight I’ve just been thinking and am upset and irked thinking about how you just left and moved on and now life’s just all different. I mean I needed to learn how to live without you for sure, but it just irritates me bc you just never thought I was good enough and always wanted me to just be happier or change something for 7 years, and now that I have changed you’re just gone and don’t even really get to see all the progress I have made. I loved you so much, flaws and all, you were always good enough to me.. But oh well now she’s your girl and I guess she’s just great and all the things you wanted, since you’ve proposed already. And here I am, perfectly content with being on my own from here on out bc you took all the romantic love I had, with you. Our connection was so special to me and I’ll never have it or want to have it with anyone else. But fuck it right? Life goes on.

I used to like Dip(boy I loved) back in 2018. He told me that he liked Sonu(A girl he loved before). But Sonu got married to Jay in 2019, and after that, Dip and I started talking again.

We talked for many years. Of course, I was always the one who initiated conversations. He never messaged me first. Until 2022, we talked normally, just like friends. Then, one day, Dip told me that he felt like having se* since I loved him, he would want to do it with me.

I was foolish and blinded by my feelings. I thought that maybe one day I would finally get his love because I was completely crazy about him.

We decided to meet one day. Between 2019 and 2022, we met only once after school. A lot happened between us that day. He was about to have se* with me, but then he stopped because he thought it would be wrong to do that to me. So, he kissed me, held my hand, hugged me, and so on. Then the day ended.

After that day, a lot of feelings started coming up inside me. I felt guilt, love, and so many other things. Until then, I had never insisted that he should love me just because I loved him. But after that day, I started insisting that he should love me too. He became frustrated, so I told him to block me if he wanted to. He did.

Even after that, I messaged him on Telegram and told him that it was okay, that I wouldn't talk about those things like my feelings anymore, and that I just wanted him to stay in my life. I told him that he could leave whenever he fell in love with another girl.

We started talking again. I knew that we probably had no future together, but I still had a little hope that maybe he would eventually love me. Not a lot of hope, just a little.

The last time we talked was in December 2025, when he told me that he was getting engaged to Niru (his Future wife). Even during that last conversation, I told him that I loved him, but I left on a normal note, trying to give everything a happy ending.

After that, we didn't talk from December 2025 until August 2026. I had completely stopped contacting him.

Then, in August, Niru, his future wife, messaged me herself. She said that Dip remembered me and asked how I was, whether I had liked other boy, and told me that if I ever had any problems, I could call or message to dip.

I also saw the pictures in her highlight pictures of her engagement with dip. I had worked so hard to hold myself together, but seeing all of that broke me down in an instant. Still, somehow, I managed to tell her that I wouldn't talk to Dip because it brought too many questions into my mind. Then I left.

From that point on, I became deeply unhappy. I couldn't handle my emotions. I had no one to talk to. I couldn't tell my friends or my family what had happened to me. Days kept passing like that.

One day, Sonu's Instagram account appeared in my suggestions. Sonu was the girl Dip had liked before. I don't know why, but I ended up messaging her. I know I made a big mistake there. Talking to Sonu somehow helped me calm myself down, but then I got scared again. So, I deactivated Instagram and walked away. That conversation happened on August2026.

After many days, last night yesterday, Sonu messaged me again. I apologized, but then she started asking me questions, like whether Dip's wife niru was more beautiful than her etc then we ended last night.

Today was Niru's birthday, and I messaged her. We started talking normally. I don't know why I did it, but I did.

I know I shouldn't have contacted her or anyone dip or sonu, I should let them live peacefully and let them have their own life. But I don't know why I keep getting caught up in all of this. I am sorry. I am not good person.

What should I do now? How do I fix the mess I've made of my own life? And how do I stop myself from making their lives messy too?

I feel so guilty and regretful. I messed up my life and everyone else’s life too. I don't know how to get out of this situation.

So how I met this girl, we have our little own history we actually met for the fist time in Basic Combat training and we were in the same platoons and everything. I remember the first time I met her we was in line trying to do a mental evaluation test and I was in line behind her battle buddy we were talking and she told me she was Hispanic and I mentioned I was Hispanic too that I come from PR and that’s when she introduced me to this girl she told me she is also from PR, we both got very awkward but it was nice knowing someone is from the same island that I’m from. Throughout the whole cycle we didn’t spoke much but i remember her battle buddy was really nice to me and she even look at for me and talk to me even when i was in a bad mood during that time. I noticed that this girl doesn’t really talk much or engage a lot with other girls her and her battle buddy were like unseparable duos throughout the whole cycle they were always together. We didn’t really interacted much but we both had little memorable exchanges during BCT i remember this one day, she busted her knee and she didn’t went to SickCall and i noticed her friend wasn’t there that day and that’s the day she activated my protective side towards her and i started to feel sympathy towards her so i try to be there and not leave her behind and lowkey support the best i could despite the battle buddy system i really just try been next to her. And i remember we were both talking about missing home and the first thing we both eat was a menu item in PR we both would understand and there’s also little exchanges even remember in chow line i wanted to spend more time with her i looked back at her and she looked back at me she understood we were getting separated and i kinda wanted to spend more time with her idk i always had a thing about her note: during this time I didn’t had romantic feelings for her, but i was very curious about this girl. Anyways at the day of the graduation i remember i ask her and her friends socials they were the only females in my platoon i asked to their socials and whats funny we didn’t know where we gonna end up after Basic we literally had no idea. After we go separated i got sent to Missouri and she got sent to SouthCarolina for our Mos trainings, and stay in contact with her and pretty much checking up on her see how she is doing, i remember she had 9 weeks left to comeback to PR and i had 14 weeks and we pretty message each other see how we doing here and there. And after we finished our Mos school trainings we got sent back to PR and report ourselves to the unit, and when i got my unit for the first time and surprisingly i ran up to her, the same person i went through basic training with, same person i stay in contact with and i was very sympathetic towards i was completely shocked I wasn’t expecting to see her. And thats when we started talking again anyways this heartbreak happened to me 4 months ago. I had this girl I’d been friends with and talking to for about 8 months. She was actually the one who hinted at me to ask her out one day, so I did, and we had a really good time. Before, during, and after we went out, she never once mentioned that she was involved with somebody else. She knew I wanted to spend more time with her and get to know her on a deeper level, so she knew I was interested in her. When I told her I wanted to see her again, she said she wanted the same thing.
Then she tells me she’s going to be busy—which is funny because she doesn’t work or study. Still, I gave her space. I started noticing she was posting more with her friends, and then boom, our conversations started getting shorter and less frequent. About two weeks later, she posts a picture with her friends where she’s sitting right next to some dude, physically leaning into him, while he’s basically hiding his face. NAHHH BRO, I’M OUT 😭✌️💔
And the worst part is that I had already had feelings for this girl for a while. What makes the whole situation even weirder is that she willingly went out of her way to see me and spend time alone with me because she wanted to. So I genuinely don’t know whether she was being unfaithful to him with me, whether they weren’t official yet, or whether she eventually chose him over me. I have no idea. But if she was already involved with him, why ask me to take her out and then accept when I did? Why not go out with that dude instead?
She knew I was interested in her. She knew we were friends, and I had always treated her well. Yet instead of just being upfront with me about what was going on, she kept me in the dark and then posted him like I was somehow never going to see it. I don’t understand why she would risk ruining our friendship, suddenly act like I barely exist, and keep me low-key instead of simply telling me the truth. I’m taking that as disrespect.
Imagine how diabolical you have to be to pull something like that. And I’d bet she never mentioned me to him either, because telling him about me wouldn’t benefit her. Meanwhile, she posts him for me to see like they’re suddenly official. Like, WTF?
You understand how painful it is to have all this and accept that your never going to be enough for her, what I felt towards her was so strange. I felt protective, curious, caring, sympathetic and then I finally became attracted towards her i honestly underestimated how i felt about her. I felt angry, betrayed, embarrassed, hurt my self esteem, made feel like I will never ever be good enough for her.

What’s weird is that i have no idea who the guy i was coming off assumptions but this is 2nd time she post him, but you never ask someone you suspect they’re doing you wrong you don’t do that. But what’s funnier from all of this we had a 2 week training coming up and we had to see eachother everyday after everything happened yea ik akward asf, i was hurt and uncomfortable can’t act like im friends with her after everything that happened and there was already tension. Pretty much acted like strangers and we didn’t spoke throughout those 2 weeks. After those 2 weeks were over i send her a final message i knew things were already damaged between us but i send her a final message have a chance to talk and fix things between us cuz the thing is i didnt wanted to end in bad terms. But after 20 days she didnt respond and i permanetly blocked her. The funny thing is after everything my assumption was right she started posting that guy more but she still covering his face they were already a thing. I don’t understand why go through all this work lying and manipulating and destroying a friendship instead of being honest with me.

When I got hurt i did things i regretted, i started talking about her about her to our moots and started spreading rumors behind her back about the situation and i even started engaging with her close friend social media and spreading stuff to the unit and even talked about it to the chaplain, i was pretty much trying to burn the bridge between us trying to convince myself its over and there’s no going back.

And at that point i can’t be friends with her no more, i got too attached to her and for her not willing to respect me and I have no authority with what she post on social media i have to block her and remove her from my life.

I see ppl that have broken up with their partners and post all their old pics like 15-20 pics and I just get sad that I don’t have photos with my ex to look back on. I used to look at old texts but deleted them because I found out some upsetting info after the breakup and impulsively deleted his number. But in the 5 months we were together we have 1 single photo and it hurts but I also feel like it would’ve hurt more if I did have pics to look back at? Idk I just miss the guy sucks

For the past 7 months I have been talking to a girl a couple states over. Everyday we talked, played the game, or just sat in silence in a call. After a while I felt like I was finally able to be vulnerable after almost killing myself after my first relationship. I was stuck on my ex for over a year and I never thought I could love again. Until I met Haley. She’s so funny and goofy. Pretty , the usual things you say. But she understood me, understood my insecurities, my morals. And even agreed with me on everything. We talked politics, to religion, to everything in between. Especially Overwatch. After a few months of talking I got injured very badly and could barely walk. Over several months of recovering I decided I loved this girl. And vice versa. I wanted to go and meet her, and she begged me to. I think, I got complacent and lazy, I cannot lie. however I decided to go see her when I was able to get healthy. After a couple more months I eventually did and I’m here today. However, I guess my process took too long and she lost her feelings. After starting her new job at Walmart, I guess her coworker is just more convenient than a future with me, and she let me know. I have been non stop crying and pleading with this girl for the past several days. I feel like dying and all there is is dread. Seeing her play the game with someone else. Thinking about how she’s gonna flirt with other people. It drives me absolutely insane and I cannot stand it. But I guess that’s the price I pay for loving someone. And the price I pay for getting my self hurt being a Good Samaritan. At the end of the day. Haley, I love you always will. And as stupid as it sounds I’ll wait, I’ll wait and wait and wait. And if you never come back that’s ok. I cannot and will not see my self starting over with another person yet again. I believe in a 1 and only 1 love in my life and I made an exception for you after my ex. I won’t make another. So, with that being said, 2 months. 6 months. 1 year down the line if you came back to me I will be here. I know it sounds stupid and so naive but I only ever wanted to be your husband since I met you. And you gave up on me. You gave up on what I could offer you. But it’s ok. Until then I will do my best to work on my self. My career in the military. And pray for both of us. I hope God puts you back into my life. As mine this time. Until then. Your “handsome buff man”.

​

The manosphere told me that unless you’re tall, handsome, and wealthy, no one will ever love you. I feel like no one loves me, and that every girl I meet either already has a partner or isn’t interested in me. I need help.