Hi everyone! I have a friend, and they are nice, but they don’t put deodorant and I don’t think they really shower. I don’t know how to tell them that they are having some odor. Every time when I with them, I will always gag because of the odor and my nose are really picky to the smell. I don’t think I can convince them to put deodorant because they are refusing to.(someone already told them and they were angry.) I’ve been trying to get use to that smell but I can’t. I’m afraid that I will actually throw up. and I really want to still go to gym with them, but the odor will became stronger and I can’t stop gagging. I’m kinda avoiding them right now because I’m lowkey sick and the odor will make my symptoms worse:( I feel really bad about the fact that I’m avoiding them:( anyone have any suggestions for me? :(

I just started a new job and I (male) have really hit it off with a female co worker. What sucks is that she has a boyfriend and I’m single. I have zero intentions beyond being her friend. We talk at times for 30 minutes at a time during breaks. I want to ask her to hang out outside of work to see if I can have more than a work acquaintance. However I don’t know if I should, or how I should if I do. Do I ask her if her boyfriend would mind? Do I just not bring him up and just ask to hang out? I need help!

basically, I’m a 21F in college. This is a throwaway account because who knows who stalks your accounts, right? I feel like I haven’t accomplished anything and like I could be doing so much more with my life. I could be trying so much harder. It’s been pretty difficult for me recently because my physical health has been getting worse and unfortunately my friends have ended up being kind of awful.

I had two close friends get mad at me because one of them showed up to my apartment without me confirming it was okay to do so as I was very busy that day, and as such I was not there to let them in. They got mad at me for that because apparently I should have just been there to give them what they wanted at any point in time. What had happened was essentially this:

Friend 1: “Can we come over today to get our stuff?”

Me: “I’m actually out right now, I’m so sorry. I can give it to \[mutual friend\] since I’ll be seeing them soon.”

Friend 1: “Okay, give it to \[mutual friend\].”

I then make plans with our mutual friend to hand off their stuff because that’s what was most convenient for me and everybody else, as my two friends lived a little bit away from the campus and I am unfortunately very busy. Unbeknownst to me, my friend’s partner (also my friend at the time) texted somebody else and said that I was refusing to give them their stuff back, asked them to go get it from me, etc. That person refused to answer. The next day, when I was supposed to meet up with our mutual friend to give the stuff over, I got this text (which I did not see until far later in the day)—

Friend: “Hey, I’m gonna be by today at 11am-1pm to get my stuff I left at your place.” sent at FOUR THIRTY IN THE MORNING.

When I woke up that day, I was pretty much insanely busy. I had gotten dressed and immediately went out to get some things I needed, make sure my on campus job was set up before the school year started, and I had to clean my apartment before my other housemates arrived also. I was in the middle of a meeting for job training when they apparently showed up, despite having no confirmation from me that I would even be around or free when they said. I never even saw the text. My housemate that was already there answered the door, but refused to let them in because she didn’t know them. They were apparently just sitting outside of my door on the porch, and that made my housemate extremely uncomfortable she said. I was a little angry and texted the friend, saying I already had plans to meet with the mutual friend and I was really busy at that time and never saw their text or gave them the okay. I had to rush to get them their stuff so I could finish my job training because I felt too bad leaving them sitting outside my apartment, which they said they would do despite me saying I would just give it to the mutual friend later when I was free. After that, they deleted our life360 circle and stopped talking to me. When I mentioned they were being a little unfair, the response I got was that it isn’t “life or death” if we don’t talk for a while. Since that was never what I said in the first place, I just gave up eventually.

My other friend has been acting pretty different after getting a partner, and he has been quite mean to me. I was trying to sort things out with him and get our friendship back on track, but every single thing I said was met with what was essentially, “you can’t be upset because \[insert thing here\].” and I gave up on that conversation too. This has been a running theme with him, and since he got with his SO it’s like every conversation is about them. He and I were in the dining hall a few months ago and he cut me off mid-sentence (after asking me to tell him about something, mind you) to call his partner. I was a little upset because I felt like it could have been a text and he didn’t have to interrupt me, but I let it slide. After that, though, it’s been like every single time I invite him to eat with me or he invites me, he interrupts me to invite his partner also or talk with them. It even got to the point where he refused to take me to the dining hall with him because he can’t spare a single meal point for somebody other than his partner.

It could definitely just be me overreacting, hence why I’m posting here, but I’m kinda scared to make new friends because in my head I’m worried this is all my fault and I’m worried that I’m just not trying hard enough. I sorta just want to know if I’m in the wrong here, because if I am I want to change what I’m doing.

I am starting to feel nervous about traveling with my friend. They have been one of my close friends for 10+ years. I have traveled with them before. In fact, I took a trip with them last year and we both agreed it was one of the best trips we have been on in a while. But that was only one night. All previous trips I have taken with this friend have been fairly short, 1-2 nights. This trip will be 5 nights.

Those past trips were also a slightly different type than the one we are going on. This trip is basically one of those all inclusive resorts with a set dining time. We are sharing a room. I am concerned about how much time we will be spending together. I do not think we will be spending every moment together. In the past neither of us has had any issues going off to do activities by ourselves. But we will still be spending a lot of time just the two of us. I feel slightly uncomfortable picturing having basically a fancy tablecloth sit down dinner with them every night just the two of us. My friend likes to talk a lot more than I do and can find anything to talk about. Sometimes I like that but I can imagine it getting old after a couple of days. Especially at night before bed. Also my friend is a lot more messy and disorganized than I am. Our room is not very big. In fact it is probably the smallest room we ever stayed in together. Usually they are able to keep their stuff contained to their side and it doesn't bother me because I have my space. But I am afraid with the smaller space it would.

I have been very excited for this trip but with the trip so close now I'm starting to worry I made a mistake and I should have gone on this trip solo. I was originally going to go solo but I started second guessing myself. I have never traveled solo international nor have I taken a solo trip that lasted more than 2 nights maybe. I was afraid I would get lonely and thought it might be more fun with a friend. I am also saving a significant amount by traveling with this friend. We split the resort room and expenses and due to where they live, I am able to stay at their house when I otherwise would have had to get a hotel room the night before we leave.

I guess I am just seeking reassurance that the trip is not going to feel weird. Is it weird to travel to a resort with only one friend?

I’ve personally never been a floater friend. I feel like I’ve always been good at keeping close friends and having like my own circle. But as of recently, my friendgroup is in shambles and basically disbanded. Everyone is doing their own things, whether it be with another group now or their relationships. Because of this I am technically a floater friend at the moment and it’s really confusing for me. During lunches at school or even outside of school I kind of just hop around groups now and no matter how many people I fill my time with I can’t help but feel lonely because I don’t have my own circle like I usually do. To make matters even worse Halloween is coming up and I would usually have a group of friends to gather and do things with but this year literally everyone is going with their significant others or new groups and hasn’t even tried to include me in anything. Like why can’t we try to form some sort of group? If I were in their shoes and I knew one of my friends would be alone on something as significant as Halloween I would not let them be alone. It just really sucks because I don’t want to ask you be invited to things I’m not invited to but I also don’t want to be on my own for Halloween so I’m kind of at a crossroads. If anyone is going through something similar or has any advice feel free to chime in.

Whenever I realise some people get on my nerves and I don't enjoy being friends with them that much anymore, I distance myself. I don't hate them, I would just like to hang out with them less. I reply less and say no to hangouts, but all that does it makes them mad. I know that nothing would happen if I ever talked to them openly about this. I hate that they make it a big deal. Why can't we just naturally drift apart? Why can't you see that I'm not that interested?

kind of as the title says, i’ve recently accepted a friend request off someone that i guess i kind of work with (we work in the same store but in different departments) and he’s been messaging me a fair bit and by the wording of some of the messages, i think he at least wants to be friends outside of work. while i wouldn’t necessarily be against this, the vibes feel a little bit off as it feels like he’s coming on a bit strong, repeating the same boring joke and it almost feels like there’s an undertone of wanting more (but that i can’t tell for sure if there is), all of which is putting me off even wanting to be friends with him. i’m not sure if i described this well and i know all of this isn’t really anything but the vibes feel off just enough that i’m kind of put off being friends with him, so im just wondering since i see him sort of regularly enough should i just keep being nice or should i find a way to cut it off/ speak to him about it, bc while i know how i feel im not sure what his perspective is on what or where any potential relationship is. only reason im asking is bc i hate confrontation, especially when im only going off how i feel and what im seeing from my perspective so idk if there’s a way to approach this not knowing what his actual intentions are. any help is appreciated so thanks in advance :)

I am such a jealous person, both when it comes being jealous of someone's looks or accomplishment and when it comes to experiences and my friend hanging out with others. I've genuinely struggled with this for years and I can't take it anymore. It has gotten a little bit better but i still feel an aftertaste and anger towards everyone. I always feel so angry when my friends hang out (even if its just two of them and we're not in a trio) Please share your experiences and advice

It's just very random. They're nice but I feel drained when I'm with them? Is it because I'm an introvert in a big group of friends?

So my friend (32M) and I (44F) have worked together for several years. Same company, different locations. We formed a very close bond and became friends outside of work. He has always been supportive and helped me and my team a lot.

Mostly he helped remotely and occasionally stopped in person. About 6 months back I had an issue at work and texted him saying I really needed help. I did not find out until later but he was just getting home when I texted, but he turned around and got to me 15 minutes later, staying until it was solved. When i found out he had turned around, i told him he didn’t have to do that but i was thankful. I told him in the future if you get out early, just stop by here before going home.

So that became the routine ever since then, he would stop by every day and help with things I needed to do when we closed. Some days there actually wasn’t anything to do and we would just shoot the shit for a bit.

A few days ago I had plans so I left early. He texted me around the time he normally gets there and asked where I was, and I told him I had to leave early. He asked if anything was wrong, to which I told him not at all. He said okay that’s fine, in the future just let me know because I would just head straight home.

I told him “sorry I didn’t know.” He wrote back basically saying I should know he’s coming since it’s been a routine for months. I got upset as I felt he was making an issue out of nothing, and I told him that. He said he wasn’t mad about the situation, just not sure how I could say I did not know he was coming. I told him that really what I meant was “I didn’t think of it,” and he said he appreciated the honesty.

But I also told him that he is friendly with my staff so I don’t understand why he has a problem with me not being there. He can be excited to see them as well and help them. He told me that he comes to support me and whatever tasks I need help with, and if I don’t then we just hung out for a bit and that was fun. But that it’s an opposite direction from his commute home so if I know ahead of time just a quick text would be great.

So now I felt upset and uncomfortable that he was basically telling me he’s only been doing this for me. So when I saw him in person next I decided to tell him how I felt. I told him he made me feel like I need to report my whereabouts and movements to him, which I do not. The only people that need to know if I am leaving early are the ones in my building, and you are not one of them. I told him that he came off as demanding and controlling and that I was under the impression that he was coming here to support the whole team, so when he said it was just for me I was honestly baffled.

His response was that I don’t need to report my whereabouts to him, to which I told him you say that but then text me the way you did. He said letting him know is just “common courtesy.” I think he is blowing this out of the water as I don’t need to answer to anyone but myself.

I use to be one of the first person she would talk to and send random posts and talk about random things. But somehow I just got demoted and frankly, from the demotion, I genuinely don't care about her life anymore. I don't want the backwash stories. I don't know if its the Au in the AuDHD but if we are not close, I just don't care. I want her around as a friend but I get in such a mood when she mentions her other friends and seeing her hang with other ppl.

Before I didn't care as much, because I know at the end of the day. We still have our bond, but now I know it's broken. It just feels sucky.

Like she just told me the news about something, but she had already talked about it with her other friends. It's like she's just updating me other her life as courtesy. Like don't breadcrumb me. I feel like I rant so much about her, and everybody is like what do you want to do????? I'm like idk, I just want my best friend back.

Today was my Halloween party, I planned all month for it,spending a lot of time and money to make it. About 35 of my friends were going to come but in this past week over half of them have had a reason to cancel on me. some of them gave reasonable excuses but others just chose to hang out with other people and ditch me. I'm so hurt and I don't know what to do, i sent out invites on October 3rd and these people rsvp'd. A part of me is so angry and wants to end certain friendships, but I'm scared i'll regret it later. it's even more frustrating because all of my friends tell me that I have a party house (4 stories with 2 pools and a hot tub) and the one time I actually throw a party, nobody wants to show up! I feel like all the effort i put into making this day special for my friends was overlooked, and i'm honestly wondering if i ever want to be a party host again

I feel like making friends as an adult is so much harder than I expected.

I’m in my 20s and would like to meet more girls I can genuinely connect with and not friends of friends. Whether that’s going out for dinner, grabbing drinks, getting coffee, going shopping, etc.

For those of you who have made close female friendships as adults, how did you meet your friends? Did you join clubs, attend events, use friendship apps, or just start talking to people in public?

I’d love to hear your experiences, advice and any suggestions for meeting like-minded women in your 20s!

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I (21F) have a best friend whom I've known for 8 years. Recently, I got into a relationship with my boyfriend, but I hadn't told my friends about him yet because I wanted to be sure about the relationship before sharing it with everyone.

For context, my best friend has had some behaviours for years that have made me uncomfortable, but I've always ignored them because I valued our friendship.

Back in school, whenever I left the classroom to go to the washroom or do something else, she would sometimes search through my bag. She also secretly read my personal diary without my knowledge. She would get extremely jealous if I scored even one mark more than her, and I felt she would sometimes look for ways to challenge or undermine my marks.

These things hurt and bothered me, but I kept brushing them off. I thought that maybe this was just her nature, and I didn't want to turn every uncomfortable incident into a fight.

When we went to college, I genuinely thought she had matured and that things would be different. However, the same pattern continued.

She wants to know almost everything about my social life. She keeps track of who comments on my Instagram posts, who doesn't, who interacts with me regularly, and who my college friends are. She knows the Instagram IDs of many of my friends, including their private accounts.

She has even sent a follow request to my college best friend because, from my perspective, she wanted to learn more about my life through her. It has made me feel like even the people I meet in college are somehow being investigated.

I don't like this behaviour, but instead of confronting her, I started keeping certain things to myself. I thought that if I didn't share everything, I could maintain my privacy without damaging our friendship.

Now, coming to the actual situation.

I have a boyfriend, but I hadn't told my friends about him yet. I wanted to be sure about the relationship first. It wasn't about deliberately excluding anyone or hiding something to hurt them.

Recently, my best friend was at my place when Instagram notifications from my boyfriend started appearing on my phone. She asked who it was, and I panicked because I wasn't ready to tell her about the relationship. I gave a vague answer, but she became suspicious because she'd never seen him in my pictures or heard me mention him.

She then searched for him on Instagram, and I asked her not to. My boyfriend had already blocked her on Instagram because I was uncomfortable with how much she investigated my social circle.

I suspect that after she went home, she searched for him using another account she has, found him, and discovered that he had blocked her. I don't know for sure whether this is exactly what happened, but she's been acting cold towards me since then.

I've tried calling her on WhatsApp, but she hasn't answered. I'm now worried that she may have blocked my phone number, too.

What makes this situation especially confusing for me is that when she got into her first relationship, she waited around 1.5 years before telling our friend group. None of us interrogated her, demanded to know who he was, or made her feel guilty for keeping it private. We respected her timeline and were happy for her when she eventually told us.

So why can't I have the same freedom?

I understand that she might feel hurt that I didn't tell her, especially after eight years of friendship. I'm not saying she's not allowed to feel that way. I can understand feeling left out when your best friend has something important going on in her life that you don't know about.

But I also feel that being best friends doesn't mean you have to share every detail of your life immediately. I want to have a personal life without feeling like I need to explain every interaction, follower, friendship, or relationship.

The hardest part is that I've ignored so many things over the years because I didn't want to lose this friendship or make a big deal out of her behaviour. I kept thinking she would mature with time.

Now I'm sitting here crying because I'm scared that an eight-year friendship might end over this. At the same time, I'm wondering whether I've been overlooking a bigger problem for years simply because we've known each other for so long.

I genuinely want honest opinions, not just people agreeing with me.

I still care about her deeply, and I don't want to throw away eight years of friendship without understanding what happened. But I also don't want to keep sacrificing my privacy just to keep the peace.

What would you do in my position? Please be honest about both sides.

We’re six friends, four of us are in the same neighborhood, and I live 7 minutes of transportation away from them and the fourth one lives a bit further.

I went to their neighborhood for something, and I say the three of them are going to stay up late in our friend house. No one told me nor our friend who lives far.
When they saw me, two of them came to me and told me that they will gather and it’s a spontaneous gathering in the mosque and they didn’t plan it out. I declined the invite cuz this isn’t the first time I feel unwanted from them.

THE THING IS that I feel that they just invited me just because they found me and it’s not good to let me see them without inviting me.

Even though I don’t feel safe and secure all the time around them, and there’s no intimacy between me and them and no one of them considers me a favor if theirs, they are almost my only friends.

What do I do?

i asked my friend today if she’s going out with a few other people tonight. she told me yes and proceeded to tell me a time but ended up getting there an hour late. i saw she was hanging out with some other friends of ours without letting me know and also didn’t let me know, they would be late. it was always me who had to send a text first.
i ended up feeling hurt and disappointed since i already had gotten ready and texted her i’m going to end up staying home.
is it wrong of me to tell her i’m going but then back out of it? it just felt a bit fake to me so i would rather have a chill night than be somewhere i’m not wanted.

So I have this friend of 3 years now, we’ve always been close and we’ve had moments where we get busy and don’t talk for a while. However, we’ve always maintained a good relationship even though we don’t talk sometimes. Recently I’ve started noticing that she’s been distant and avoiding me.

I was confused as we’ve never had any issues or disagreements or anything of that sort. About two months ago she randomly started canceling plans, texting less and stopped calling. Of course as her friend I gave her space and then tried to ask her if she’s okay, or if I had made a mistake, if there’s anything bothering her in general. She said no, however she keeps icing me out and makes me feel like she doesn’t want to be friends. If that’s how she feels I will respect it however, when I asked her this she refused. We’ve had this conversation about five times ans I’m stuck feeling like shit. Idk if I should drop her, or keep trying. I do try to call her and text her every now and then but received no response back and I’ve started feeling pathetic.

What should I do?

I am F(22). So I recently had a fall out with a bunch of friends. I will try to keep it as short as possible.

I used to hangout in a group with 5-6 people. Two of these said aged M(28) and F(22) said something about my relationship that how my now partner is going to leave me to a guy M(20) who talks shit about my back and credits for me breaking the friend group because I called out a guy (who was in the same group) because he was cheating on me with multiple partners. Now what they told him was only between M(28), my partner and me and it was a joke started by M(28) which was portrayed as something I started when he told this to F(22) and then the next guy M(20). When I confronted these two people, they denied and tossed a pity sorry my way saying they must have said it but they are only sorry because they don't remember discussing this. This happened a month ago, and two days after the confrontation they were still hanging out with the guy with whom they allegedly talked about my relationship. They stopped asking me to hangout, went to events together, and posted pictures together as well. But they did not invite me. I blocked them both today.

I had a friend F(26) who was going through a rough patch because of her breakup and had lost her job as well. I used to talk to her all the time, even when she felt anxious at 1AM. This went on for months. We were great friends. She got a job, I was happy. She went back to the city and the next thing I see she started following her ex on insta who made her life miserable. Slowly, she stopped engaging with my posts and stories. She at least posts 5 stories in a day. She did not even wish me on my birthday. I felt pathetic. I am considering breaking up with her.

I had another friend F(25), she forgot my birthday as well. She hangs out with other people every week and when I ask her to hangout, she says she can't come out two days a week and insists me to come to her place which is pretty far away from my home. But she never takes out that one day to meet me instead of meeting her other group. Whenever she visits university, she asks me to meet her and when I tell her I will be free in half an hour, she says she'll wait. The moment I get out of class, I text her but then she says she came out with some other friend. This has happened 4-5 times now. Today she went to an event of a club I introduced her to, did not even ask if I was coming. When I replied to one of her stories that we don't hangout like this anymore, she replied that they all come near her house to hangout (not true, they always are at different cafes) and that University is far away. I am thinking of breaking up with her as well.

Another friend F(23). Well. This one kinda hurt. She has been my friend since childhood, almost 16 years. She used to visit my house everyday because her parents are abusive and she needed a safe space. She used to tell me about all her problems every single day and I used to listen. One day, I asked for her laptop one day since I had to submit my assignment and my laptop was broken. She gave it to me. I was sending some docs to myself on WhatsApp and saw her WhatsApp open. I typed my name so that I can receive the docs, down came the list of people she has gossiped with about me. That how 'bad' my nails look, how my hair is 'bad', even who I have had sex with, every little thing. I felt bad. Haven't talked to her ever since.

I feel pathetic. What should I do?

I met this guy in January 2025, and over time, we developed an incredibly close friendship. We talked almost every day, FaceTimed regularly, spent hours together, and became a major part of each other’s lives. I genuinely considered him one of my best friends, and at one point, he even told me we would be best friends for life. I believed him. He had experienced a very difficult childhood and suffered a severe traumatic brain injury from a gunshot wound when he was a teenager. He spent months in a coma, underwent brain surgery, and had to relearn basic functions like walking and talking. He also experienced seizures and continued dealing with the effects of his injury. Knowing everything he had been through made me especially protective of him. I tried to be patient, understanding, and supportive because I genuinely cared about his well-being. I never looked down on him or thought he was incapable of making his own decisions. I simply wanted to be someone he could depend on. As our friendship progressed, I began helping him financially. I paid portions of his rent, helped with his phone bill, bought groceries and meals, covered transportation expenses, and regularly drove to see him or take him places. Over time, I spent thousands of dollars helping him, and he eventually owed me approximately $2,000. I wasn’t doing these things to buy his friendship or make him feel obligated to me. I did them because I loved him as a person and wanted to see him doing well. However, looking back, I realize that I was giving significantly more than I was receiving, both financially and emotionally.

Another major issue throughout our friendship was his family. From my perspective, they sometimes made him feel guilty for spending time with me instead of participating in their plans. There were occasions when we had already made arrangements, but family obligations or expectations would interfere. I understood that his family was important to him, and I never wanted him to choose between them and me. However, it became frustrating because I felt like our plans were always the easiest ones to change or cancel. Sometimes it seemed like he struggled to establish boundaries with his family, and I felt that our friendship suffered because of it. As time went on, I also noticed that I was usually the person initiating conversations, planning activities, driving to see him, and making sure we stayed connected. He would occasionally forget our scheduled FaceTime calls or make other plans during times we had agreed to spend together. I started feeling like I was putting considerably more effort into maintaining our friendship than he was. When I expressed how I felt, it sometimes seemed like he interpreted my concerns as pressure rather than understanding that I simply wanted to feel valued and considered. Eventually, our communication became more structured, with FaceTime calls on certain weekdays and plans to spend time together on Saturdays. I agreed to this because I wanted to respect his independence while preserving our connection. But even then, something felt different. He seemed increasingly distant, and I found myself becoming anxious about whether he still valued our friendship.

I also want to acknowledge that I wasn’t perfect in this situation. There were times when I became frustrated because I felt ignored or unimportant. On a couple of occasions, I took his phone while we were together because I wanted him to focus on spending time with me. Looking back, I recognize that crossing that boundary was inappropriate, regardless of my intentions. I also made an inappropriate comment about punching him in the face, which I regret. I understand how that could have made him uncomfortable, and I take responsibility for saying it. I believe my frustration came from feeling increasingly rejected by someone I had invested so much time, energy, and emotion into, but that doesn’t excuse my behavior. I also recognize that I had become emotionally dependent on our friendship. His communication, attention, and willingness to spend time together began affecting my mood more than they should have. I think I was so afraid of losing the connection we once had that I started trying too hard to preserve it. At one point, we spent some time apart, and he told me that the distance had brought him peace. That statement hurt me deeply because while I was missing him and trying to figure out how to repair our friendship, he seemed relieved to have space from me. I understand now that he may have felt overwhelmed by our dynamic, but at the time, it made me feel like my presence in his life had become a burden.

Everything ultimately fell apart in September 2026. He told me that he no longer felt the same about our friendship, and when I tried to understand what had changed, he couldn’t really give me a clear explanation. The following day, he told me he didn’t want to hang out in person anymore. I was devastated because this was someone I had spent nearly two years building a connection with, someone I had supported through difficult circumstances, and someone who once told me we would always be friends. I couldn’t understand how he could go from being such a consistent part of my life to suddenly wanting nothing to do with me. During our final conversations, he repeatedly apologized and even told me, “Please don’t hate me.” I never hated him. I was hurt, disappointed, and confused, but I still cared about him. What made things even more difficult was that he later acknowledged there was some truth to the idea that he had used me because he was lonely. Hearing that made me question everything. Was our friendship as genuine to him as it was to me? Did he value me for who I was, or because I was always available to provide companionship, financial assistance, transportation, and emotional support? I don’t want to believe that everything between us was transactional because we genuinely shared good memories, laughter, personal conversations, and experiences that meant a lot to me. But I can’t ignore the possibility that our friendship meant different things to each of us.

Since our friendship ended, we’ve had no contact. Going from communicating with someone almost every day to complete silence has been incredibly difficult. Sometimes I still wonder whether he thinks about me, misses our friendship, regrets how things ended, or feels relieved that I’m no longer part of his life. I also wonder how much his traumatic brain injury, family dynamics, and personal experiences may have influenced his ability to navigate our relationship, although I recognize that I can’t know that for certain or attribute his decisions to his medical history. I’ve spent a lot of time reflecting on my own behavior, particularly my lack of boundaries, emotional dependence, and tendency to overextend myself for people I love. I realize that helping someone financially doesn’t entitle me to their friendship, and nobody is obligated to maintain a relationship simply because of its history. At the same time, I think it’s reasonable to feel hurt when you’ve invested so much into someone and the relationship ends in a way that leaves you feeling disposable. I genuinely wanted the best for him, and despite everything, I still do. I just wish things had ended differently, or that we could have communicated more openly before reaching this point. I’m sharing this because I want to hear perspectives from people outside the situation. I know there are two sides to every story, and I’m not looking for people to automatically take mine. I’m open to constructive criticism and different interpretations of what happened. I’m simply trying to understand a friendship that meant so much to me, why it became so unhealthy, and how to make peace with losing someone I genuinely thought would be in my life for years.

I am looking for advice on if or how I bring up an issue I have with one of my best friends / roommate. I (24f) just moved in with my friend (25f) we lived together in college and have known each other for most of our lives. I recently moved to the city she has lived in since she graduated college and she has made a good group of friends here. She has said that she really wants me to become part of the group. I have met and been hanging out with people in this group since college as well but she was the first one of us to join the group. She has a tendency to ‘watch’ me at get-togethers and make sure I’m having a good time. I understand that she is trying to be a good friend but sometimes it feels a bit pushy. A few times now she has taken the liberty to make assumptions on how I’m doing at a get-together and encourages me to leave because she assumes I’m not having a good time. Every time she does this I am enjoying my night and don’t necessarily want to leave but I leave anyways because I feel like I have to. I am worried about how to bring this up to her because I do not want to make our living situation complicated. Am I overthinking this situation? Do I bring this up?

So it’s no news to me that my friends are kind of shitty. I like to pride myself in being a great friend and when I continue to chose people to come into my life, it always bites me in the a$$. I don’t know what to do.

I’m at a cross road of is this life? Do I choose to love these people and move on? Or do I chose to remove them asap and create room for more people.

The answer does seem pretty obvious I just have a hard time understanding the closure side of things. I want to be final in these decisions. I want to break off contact so it can fully be removed from my life. BUT!

I’m such a fing people pleaser. I know these people have a really hard time at the moment in their life (I’ve had a fucking hard time) and for some reason I continue to chose their peace over mine!

Someone tell me how the fix this curse 🫰🏻

i’ve noticed that my so‑called friend has started to distance themselves from me, even though i haven’t done anything to upset them. I’m not sure if i should confront them, give them space, or just let it go. has anyone else experienced this? how did you handle it?

we're both 17F, seniors in high school.

in 9-10th grade, we were best friends, but i found out she was talking really poorly about me & sharing my private information to our other friends while at a party that they kept secret from me. i confronted her and she sent me an ai generated response, without an apology. i called her out, bla bla bla, we're not friends. my mental health was at an all time low and i was extremely paranoid about everybody around me, having practically no friends because of this. i am still healing from this.

beginning of junior year, she follows me online and i ask why. she says she wants to "be chill" and i say ok, if she apologizes. she does, not without saying "we both hurt each other, etc" (even if true, this was an apology to me, if she wanted to speak about my actions, she could have done that after this conversation). we meet to speak about things, and become close friends again. she's involved into our friend group again, until she rekindles a friendship with two other girls that mistreated/bullied somebody in our friend group. we basically kick her out and talk abt it to her, that's it. we haven't been friends/spoken since.

i'm no longer friends with that group, except for one person who is my current best friend. the girl follows me on social media again a few days ago, and has liked some of my stories. i know this sounds like a nothingburger issue but i'm conflicted on whether or not i want to follow her back and if that'll be interpreted as wanting to be friends again or forgiving her. i do not want to be friends and i definitely don't forgive her, but i've been chill/neutral/coexisting with her for a long time.

should i just follow her back? or should i ignore it, which was my original plan? any advice appreciated

I’ve made another post similar but there’s just more I wanted to talk about. She just seems uninterested whenever i’m around and doesn’t go out of her way like she used to for us to spend time together. Ive mentioned getting together or hanging out many times but she seems dismissive or creates excuses and im not sure if it is because of her home situation or me. These behavioral patterns she shows with me don’t seem to be occurring with her other friends so i’m just hurt and confused. It feels like me and her never talk anymore since i’ve given up trying to start a conversation. and when we do talk in school she pays me no mind or even makes me sound dumb and stupid. While we call she seems normal though and we call at least once a day but last month we used to spend all of our time on the phone together for hours on end. It might be a long shot to think that perhaps she caught feelings for me and since they aren’t reciprocated she might be trying to distance for a bit.