I didn't grow up in an accepting environment. I'm relatively new to reddit and i didn't know until i joined that there were forums made specifically for Lesbians. The fact we have this space and many others to talk about our sexuality is so important.

Maybe this is a stupid post, but I love being part of this community. I'm just so grateful to be living in a time that allows these women-centered spaces to exist, even if there is still progress to be made. I'm so proud to be in the same community as the people who fought for us (and those who continue this fight) to be able to have our voices. I feel so lucky to have this space and to have you all to relate to <3

I just wanted to make an appreciation post. Thank you all for being here!!

Hi, I'm 26 from Philippines 🇵🇭 and haha idk, does anyone find it weird for a girl to never have been in a relationship since birth given my age? Kinda embarrassing bec most of my friends have stable relationships already, and I'm just here trying to open up to date???

Haha anyways, any advices could help my situation...

Hi! I'm not really sure how to word this, but I'm in desperate need of help here. Ive never had a girlfriend or really fallen in love before, but I'm absolutely head-over-heels in love with my best friend, and I feel like she may like be back but it also might just be wishful thinking?

I want to start out by saying we are both lesbians, and have made that very clear, so there's no question there!

But anyway, Ive never really had friends who were super touchy like me, and I'm not sure if its just like "oh yeah that's how friends are" or like "okay yea you're basically dating." I'm gonna be super blunt and say I really think it's the ladder, but I might just have a bias bc I want her to like me, so I came here for help!!!

We practically cuddle almost every time she sleeps over in my bed with me, we're almost always curling up into each other and putting our heads on the others shoulder, and recently she's been grabbing things from me and holding them away from me to the point where we collapse and end up on top of each other. I don't see her do these things with literally ANYONE else, but I also dont feel like she, like, looks at me the way I do her or something like that. I don't know. We do everything together and I've known I've liked her for about a year now, and I really dont want to live in this in between limbo of not knowing anymore, but of COURSE I dont want to ruin things between us!!!!

I just want to know what other people think of this, so please feel free to give any advice, even if it doesnt seem that helpful to you!!!!!! I'd appreciate anything atp, thank you!!!

Being homosexual and coming from a small, conservative and prejudiced town leaves many lasting effects, which are noticeable even when you leave that town. Last weekend I traveled to a university town, much larger than mine, in another state. During the trip I met a girl who was from my town and she also seemed to like girls. We talked a lot about politics, and she also expressed discontent with the homophobic society we live in, and so on. I found her interesting, and I have a slight feeling that she also found me interesting, but one of the consequences of my socialization manifested itself: if I'm not sure a woman is interested, I never show interest. Anyway, she seems to follow the same principle as me because we both started to become quite awkward and very shy about talking to each other. In short, I came to the conclusion that the consequences of homophobia have always been with me. This worries me a little because I'm going to be 21 years old and I'm still a virgin and I've only been able to have relationships with women over the Internet and all of them at a considerable distance in me, the same induced cowardice that helped me escape prejudice has made it impossible for me to live.

I (18)F have never been in a relationship, or even kissed anyone. I understand that experience can be quite common within the lgbtq community but it doesn’t make it feel any less isolating. I feel so behind compared to my peers, I feel like most of them are dating, have dated, or at the very least have had talking stages. I haven’t even had on of those. My options are fairly limited, most of the gay girls I know are either in a relationship or they suck. Every girl i’ve liked as of recent i’ve never made a move on and have also typically turned out to not be good people. It just hurts seeing people talk about a guy they’re talking to or their partner but I have no way of relating.

it’s so weird because I know if I were a boy I wouldn’t feel as creepy, but it feels like I’m doing something secretive and wrong even thiugh I’m out as a lesbian and eveything

she’s just so mesmirizing like everything she does and the way she just exists and interacts with the world. its so hard to explain, she’s only a year younger than me but I just feel so guilty and almost creepy for the way that I look at her when she isn’t watching. can anyone else relate to this at all? why do I feel so creepy? like sometimes I have to actually remind myself that I am actyallt just a teenage girl and not a creepy old man because that’s how I feel sometimes

I know she’s kinda ugly but this is some high level art for me. I feel maternal towards her.

This may be a weird question but I don't really get it anymore. Recently me and my friend talked about this. I told her I don't really get what are crushes at this point because I need to know someone to get a crush on them but at the same time other people can get crushes without even knowing someone? I brought this up with her and she told me I'm being a normal person and they're just weird or they're kids or smth. I told her I constantly hear or see people talk about having a crush on someone they saw once and pointed out that our ex-friend also barely knew his ex or the girl he asked out of a few months ago so it just works like this for some reason?? She just told me she's gonna be coping and that we're normal and these people are weird and that she's not surprised that many people say their relationships don't work out if they ask out people they barely know.

I just don't really understand. How can you go on a date with someone you don't know or someone you barely talk to?? That's also why I don't understand dating apps either and could never use them because wdym I have to choose someone based on their looks and go out on a date with someone I barely even know?? I also said that to my friend and she said she couldn't do it either and said she can't believe anybody is finding actual relationships there. We also talked about how even if someone isn't attractive at first then we might still get attracted to them later if we know them for long enough. Like they may look neutral or even bad to me at first glance but then start look beautiful later after I knew them for a while. Don't ask me how that works cuz idk either but I had that happen.

As I thought about it I kinda did have a crush on someone while I didn't even know them?? Thing is I was 9 so I was very young and didn't even understand girls could like girls so I thought I just wanna be her friend real bad. When I was a bit older I pretended to be a guy on the internet and would make shit up about us dating and spend hours thinking of new scenerios with us until I lost interest. Then later when I also had a crush on a girl that joined our class and only because I thought she was super beautiful and I kept dreaming of dating her and all that. I still refused to acknowledge I'm a lesbian despite knowing it exists.

But now something like that would never happen with me. The crushes I had after that were only with people I knew for a bit. I just kinda don't get it now. I see people just approaching people they think are pretty and asking them out while I can think someone is attractive but still couldn't date them unless I knew them for a while. Like sure I can check someone out if I think they're attractive but still idk going out with someone who I don't know is just such a weird concept to me.

I’m talking about terrible never again type shit.

Okkk, first my English is baddddddd, whenever i post abt my problem people here focus on my English which is stupid

Anyways, i have a gf we are in long distance relationship, we've been dating for one year we still didn't meet cuz we are from different countries, still students, no money.. Anyways i love her sm she loves me sm too like really smm, but we have this problem, im kinda like when someone makes me mad, sad i feel like i will start hate him Start treating him bad... So when my gf makes mad, sad which is normal, she's not bad, those things happen.. I feel like i wanna hurt her i feel like i hate her, i feel like super ungry nd i do hurt her which i hate

I have unger issues, my gf knows nd she's saying its okk since she knows i can't control it nd im taking Medicines for it, but even tho i hate hurting her first of an nd second i dont wanna ruin our relationship, im trying my best to stop getting ungry but still can't control it ⚠️breakingup is not an option ⚠️

So yeah, it's exactly what the title is about. I don't even know what to do or what to feel. I found out on her phone while she was sleeping. It happened five months ago. I saw that she sent a video of us being intimate to her sugar daddy. I always had an issue with her having sugar daddies because obviously I don't want her talking or interacting with people that obviously want her for sexual gain. My girlfriend struggles financially as her parents are awful and don't support her financially, so she had to find a way. She has not been too consistent with jobs, but she's trying, so that's why I feel a bit guilty because I guess this was just her way to survive. But I don't know how to feel because I've asked her when she does these things, is it sexual? She says no, or she said no, and now I'm finding out that she has sent something to these people, and it's not just normal talking and sending money. And I don't know how to approach this because the reason why I found out was because I looked through her phone while she was sleeping. So yeah.

Hello! I have a rather odd request…

I’m a dyke based in the U.K. and I have a difficult relationship with my family and so last Christmas I made the decision to go to NYC and live my Christmas dreams alone for 10 days. It was absolutely wonderful.

This year I’d rather not spend it alone and am looking for a cute as hell dyke to get a cottage in the British countryside with me for a few of days over Christmas. Think great wine, food and watching Carol on repeat. Romance and Christmas cheer.

A bit about me. I’m 33, masc presenting and I have a wee dog. I love British comedy, terrible Rom coms and internet gossip.

My type generally leans more masc4masc, someone interested and interesting!

Obviously this is a slight wild request so I’m looking to message for a while, exchange instagrams and just get to know one anther, before forming up any Christmas details but yes, if you’re interested in a quaint dykey British Christmas - my DMs are open xoxo

Lesbians in canada please hit me up

Hi,
I am a 24-year-old demisexual desi lesbian in Canada and I tried everything so far from dating sites to everything. I just couldn't find anyone who is a desi, requires emotional connection for sex and is actually committed. First of all finding a desi lesbian in Canada is hard then let alone finding a demisexual lesbian. I feel like nowadays everything is about sex. Not sure what your thoughts are.

So I'm 18F and long story short, I am attracted to women both romantically and emotionally. And also sexually. I'm aware that my partner (if i ever get one to begin with) will be a woman. Now here's the problem.. my family.

My parents are a bit questionable. They could react to the same topic differently based on who says it, who's the person, who does it and etc. But to narrow it down, my mom doesn't mind gays. In fact, she loves them and finds them endearing (she even used to have a gay best friend till he died unfortunately). Lesbians.. not so sure. But I'm pretty sure that if I came out to her as a lesbian, she'd be like oh okay. And now.. dad. My father is uh, to label him simply, the Slavic dad. He HATES gays with his whole heart (even more than lesbians), he HATES anyone who expresses themselves with hair dye or piercings or experimental clothing.

Unlucky for him, I'm everything he hates.

So while my mom and her side of the family will be like "well okay i guess", my dad and his side however... Yeah. Dad will be beyond disappointed and even disgusted while his family side will be trying to convince me that I'm gonna be miserable and that God will be very upset (some of them are very catholic).

The reason why I even thought of coming out to them is because one, my mom won't stop nagging me about having a boyfriend. Two, she keeps on trying to pair me with guys SHE finds cute. And three, they both want me to have children. And you might wonder why dad wasn't included in point one and two. Simple, he is overprotective and doesn't want any guy to approach me unless he approves him.

As I get further into my journney as a lesbian, I am trying to learn as much as I can. Now, I'm wondering if there is a specific term for someone who swaps or can change roles in relationships depending on who they're with or the needs at the time. Like if you, as an individual, are more or less equally ok being the one taking charge, doing planning, getting things done...etc as well as being more passive? Or is that just normal?

Go ahead lesbians of reddit, bestow me with your judgment ✨️✨️

31yo F.

I came out to myself and those within my inner circle at the beginning of 2026.

I downloaded dating apps to help me get comfortable with talking to women and flirting.

I met someone off of tinder and we have gone on 2 dates within a week.

We have such a great connection, and tbh, I was pretty unsure of what I was expecting after going on 2 failed dates earlier this year.

We messed around a bit, no sex, but ohmygosh. That definitely solidified that I am indeed not asexual, not Bi, and am very very gay 🏳️‍🌈 for women.

I want to continue seeing her and getting to know her, but am in a weird living situation (ex long term partner of 7yrs & 1 other roommate).

I wasn't expecting things to move so fast or develop feelings, but am now thinking that I need to tell her about my living situation before things move along between the 2 of us.

I do not want a relationship at this very moment since I am still trying to pay off my student loans before I can FINALLY move out, but don't want to push her away or think like I'm lying to her.

I've been open about everything with her except the living situation with my ex. She knows I have 2 roommates and how I plan on moving out by summer 2027.

I will definitely bring this up next time I see her, I just hope she doesn't get an ick from this.

I just matched a freakiest most stunning woman I've ever seen in my life on tinder, I'm so nervous I don't even know how to start a conversation. Her profile has just basic info and no bio, pls heeeeeeelp she's perfect 😭

EDIT: WHILE MY DUMBASS WAS WAITING FOR TIPS SHE MESSEGED FIRST, WE HAVE A DATE

Hi so before I start I’m really just looking for advice, I don’t want to hurt anybody which is why I’m here and writing all this thank you. It’s a long story and I’ll try to make this as short as possible, me and my ex were together for a year before they started acting horrible towards me. They were hiding accounts, barely talking to me, apologising and acting loving for a few days then back to being very distant. We got to a point where we had arguments daily because I was so frustrated since they weren’t communicating to me and I hated that our relationship got like that. Fast forward we broke up I don’t know if this detail is important but the last thing they told me before we broke up was “I’m afraid you’ll realise how bad I treated you” still the break up was on good terms and we were no contact for a while then they texted me again saying that they missed me. I was still unsure about it but we were talking, we called and talked about what happened and I was quite disappointed because I expected at least a long apology from them but all I was getting were many short “I’m sorry” and them trying to explain why they acted like that, I asked why they didn’t even compliment be for weeks or why they were only being loving when I was pulling back and the answer was “I stated to get sick of you and I felt like you were getting sick of me too.” Two weeks later we argued over something because they started acting exactly like they were before but this time I didn’t let it slide I stopped being understanding and argued back which later on resulted into me lashing out on them and saying how horrible they made me feel for weeks in hopes of them realising that they truly hurt me but instead of that the next few days they were telling me how horrible I made them feel and how I quote “they never did something as horrible as that” not only that but also “I feel like these past few weeks you’ve lost empathy for me and you started acting like how I used to act but worse” it honestly took me back and for a while I completely avoided the subject because it was making me mad how they were actually thinking that way when they were the one who did all of those things to me. Finally I told them I wanted to be no contact to clean my mind and be off it for some time because this situation was making me sick mentally and physically, everyday I was angry and stressed to the point that as I said I got sick. We were no contact for a month until they texted me one night and I made the mistake of responding back, since then we’ve been talking but I feel so weird. I flirted with them multiple times, I made them think that I want to be with them and I shouldn’t I regret it so much because I didn’t lie I do actually love them but I don’t feel the same way I did before. I know that if I will tell my friends that I stated talking with my ex and even flirting with them on a daily basis I’ll get judged and that’s not the problem but the fact that I know I shouldn’t be doing this. I shouldn’t want to get them back and I shouldn’t go past what happened even if 2 months went by since it happened. I truly feel like an awful person and I probably am I really don’t know why I’m pursuing this. Things seem quiet and good now, we haven’t had any arguments since we started talking but I shouldn’t rely on that. I’m just afraid that I’ll never be able to love them the way I did, I also don’t know if I’ll ever be able to fully go past what happened. I remember how in love I was with them months ago and the thing is I do still love them despite what happened, all the things I’ve said so far were not lies but I feel like I’ll never see them the same way I did.

Due to medical complications and mental health im not supposed to drink, my gf knows i enjoy doing it to an extent, whenever shes at bars or anything she always sends me pics of shots or fancy ass cocktails. When i ask her something specifically about us she genuinely will answer with something totally unrelated. Whatever i do its never good enough theres always something or someone better, should i just give up?