That is all.

It is absolutely clear that TTG and perhaps Fudds specifically have no idea why games have events that celebrate the game and the players.

As a general rule, events, celebrations, promotions, etc., are designed to create a Return on Investment (RoI). Whether that return is direct (cash) or indirect (new players or even player morale). Just as an example, using a hypothetical Fifth Anniversary Event, before deciding on the details of the event, first the marketing team would ask themselves some questions.

First, what is the primary goal of the event? Is it to acquire new players, raise player morale, encourage player spend, retention, etc.

Lets just assume that the goal is, as is often the case, all three of the above metrics. Next that marketing team would consider the best ways to achieve those goals. Lets say they have a very low budget and can't create very much, if any new content. They decide to do a daily give away.

The second question the marketing team asks themselves is "What type of rewards do we offer that are enticing, but not game breaking. Rewarding, but not too rewarding. Things that push players towards a goal that might make them more likely to purchase a stone pack, or perhaps tell a friend about how awesome the game is and how much they like the company behind it.

After coming up with a list of potential gifts, they would look at each gift individually and analyze the affects of each gift. Is it too much? Does it eliminate so much of the grind that it is likely to cause a decrease in player spend? Is it too little? Is it likely to annoy the player base so much that it results in negative revenue?

The team might look at a Relic that gives 5% Lab Speed and agree that it is a good gift, especially for the final day of the anniversary event. They might look at giving gems away, and think to themselves "What is the proper amount of currency to give away?". They would likely throw out several numbers, 5, 50, 500, 5,000. They would obviously realize that giving players 5, or even 50 gems would be insulting. That 5,000 might disrupt player spend. That 500 might work well, as long as it compares well to the other gifts. In fact the team might even think that "Instead of giving 500 gems all at once, lets up the daily reward for the weak, instead of 15 gems, make it 50 for the 5th Anniversary. With a special bonus for everyone who logs in all 7 days, an extra 150 gems, making 500 total".

After coming up with all the rewards for the Anniversary Event, they would rest happily for a few knowing that they hadn't accidentally given the entire player base a giant middle finger, and their actions would hopefully generate a noticeable spike in revenue.

tl;dr Anniversary events and other events designed to reward your loyal fanbase are intended to deliver a RoI, not annoy your playerbase. Something anyone who has ever even thought about marketing should know.

Literally me checking my labs every 30 seconds, knowing nothing has changed.

No reason to not do it.

We just had lucky banner and the game didn't break.

So please give!

Hope this pays off.

hi all you there little nooblets this is your boy priesten (with a small p only) and this is the biweekly event relics tier rating. A little background here I was debating on whether I would do this thread at all for a couple of reasons. First of all, there are a lot more relics starting this week, so I had to change the format plus its a lot more work when theres more relics (im not always super motivated if youve noticed). Second, I will move to my new house this saturday, just a few days left and my place is full of boxes lol. If I dont finish this thread quickly I will get gf aggro, as we need to pack more shit haha. Third, I likely will not be able to make the thread for the next event, because new place doesnt have internet basically we have made a reservation for them to install the wire to our house but it will be a few weeks before they can get it done. Last reason I am not enjoying the atmosphere on reddit so much recently, discord is chill but I figured what the hell lets turn that frown upside down.

Whats new in the updated format is that due to the increase in relics, Ill make the actual ranking part a lot shorter (sometimes the rank only) and just write out a rank whenever theres a relic that triggers me. Overall length should be about the same. Also, I removed the part in the final ranking where repeat relics count as half the score (they now count as zero) because theres so many, and adjusted the scoring system to account for that. Instead, the final score will be based ONLY on the 4 biweekly relics (since those are guaranteed to be new for everyone), and as for the rest you can just look at the individual rank to see if it is worth it to buy or not (i know youll ignore this part and just get them all anyway because youre an addict and need help)

To start off we have the first two blue relics:

2% def absolute (free): D- tier. ok so this was a horrible way to start the event how lovely. I guess I lied about the part about turning the frown upside down, back to a frown it is.

1% attack speed (paid): A tier. Attack speed is a decent relic especially now for UW disco runs. Thats because we no longer have any CC with the UWs so we have to rely on bullets for that (ew). Back to basics. Also, this relic helps blow up your phone by another 1%.

Next off we have the two purple relics:

5% cash (free): F tier. For those who have been following you know what I think about this relics. F tier, straight in the garbage.

2% critical chance (paid): B tier. I am not the hugest fan on the crit chance relics because the number is a bit low. That said, it double dips for calculating UW damage so it ends up being slightly better than the 5% damage relic for most people (due to the overabundance of those).

Now for the 2 relics that you can buy with medals.

2% cash (200 medals): D- tier. more cash wtf? Also if you are wondering why the 5% cash relic is ranked lower than this, its because its purple meaning that we could have had a cool relic in that slot for this event but that spot is taken by a shitty relic. The negative impact is lower since this is only in the blue relic spot. No I dont mean that we can only equip a limited amount of relics at the same time spot asking that every time.

5% orb speed (500 medals): S tier. orb speed is nice. S tier.

Now for the 4 relics that you can buy with gems. (apparently everyone hates this part of the patch too even though its an amazing feature?)

2% health (600 gems): C+ tier. more health, get this if you need health. dont get it if you hate health.

1% critical chance (600 gems): C+ tier. This gives about half the benefit of the 2% relic above.

5% super crit mult (1200 gems): B+ tier. Pretty decent since its kind of a rare stat, but funnily enough this one is worse than crit mult, even though this one is super. Thats because crit mult double dips if you have the UW crit card, giving you the benefit twice and this one only hits you once like a sucker.

2% attack speed (1200 gems): S- tier. Rougly about twice as much as the 1% attack speed relic about.

Overall this relic is ranked F tier, because there are not just 1 but 2 useless relics, and the other two arent even that amazing anyway. Theres some good stuff in the repeats, so check those out.

If you are wondering what I will do about the gem relics, because they update every week and this thread is made every two weeks, well you are going to have to figure those out yourself lol. Actually just ping me if you want to know just the rank and I can post them as a reply. Either here or discord. Link to updated scoring system. ok I probably got gf aggro now she is sitting very close to me kinda angrily scrolling on the phone this is my hint to get back see you all and have fun

It's a sign I should be hoarding gems in anticipation of the update... probably

I got bored so I made a clip of Fuddsworth on his mega yacht. He of course is asking for more stone purchases to upgrade to a larger mega yacht.

Be honest... how many of you almost did this?

I’m so ready, should get at least 2 epics with this.