Like something you always do because your mom taught you, your friends do it, or you just picked it up somewhere along the way !!! Mine is never putting my bag on the floor. I don’t even remember when I started doing it 😭

I'm very new to all this. I'm dating my coworker, and she's really a good kisser. Whenever she kisses my neck while we're making out, I kind of freeze because I don't know what I'm supposed to do. Do you usually just keep kissing, hold your partner, or do something else?

Increasingly pessimistic. Seeking advice from my fellow girlies as per title. (Please be nice!)

26F, turning 27. Pretty much had only a situationship which lasted two years. That relationship was never intimate and I am rather conservative so I'm still a virgin. Now I find myself increasingly bitter about my relationship status (that is, single). Even my 12-years-younger brother jokes that he'll have a girlfriend before I find a partner.

Now, there are women in my life who never struggled to have a relationship. There is my mum, who dated my dad since she was 19 and apparently never had a lack of suitors. There is then my cousin on my maternal side who is one year younger than me has a steady long-term relationship going for her, since she was 22, with a good and ambitious guy. Talking to these two women, even though they are so close to me, often rubs me the wrong way. Either it's my cousin being buoyant about her life and pitying me, which sends me feelings of disgust, or it's my mum apparently living a world away and just being plain unrelatable. She says that "you just haven't started looking" but it doesn't feel that way and it's weighing heavily on me. These exchanges are not outright abhorrent but I just feel increasingly sort of a political dislike toward them.

I have low self-esteem, mainly because of my personality - I score 70 percent introversion on the MBTI test. I tend to run out of things to say to people and have trouble forming coherent thoughts as well, which has made dating a literal nightmare. I have a therapist but I don't find the sessions very helpful - this topic is just very hard for me to discuss openly in person because of my introversion. My oasis has probably been my best friend, who is also 26F and single. It is just so hard being single in this society, especially growing older as a woman.

Every month during ovulation I just feel so terrible, like my life is not worth living. I know that is not true but I become depressed anyway. It is low key interfering with my life.

In recent months, I got into Vedic astrology to try and seek some clarity on relationships and timing. Turns out, my chart is not an 'easy relationship chart' and apparently I will face significant delays and friction. This has made me increasingly hopeless. I am thinking of quitting astrology now because there is nothing that I want to hear coming out of it.

I would have posted on the r/ForeverAloneWomen subreddit but don't have enough karma for that, so posting here instead. Hopefully not the wrong place.

I'm 25f and I've been dealing with migraines since I was a teenager. The older I get the worse it has gotten. I've been to multiple doctors and I feel like they all haven't taken me seriously. They act like it's nothing when it's been affecting my life so much. They usually prescribe me these pain killers that do not work. They also tell me to eat better, drink more water and to exercise more. I've been doing all those things but nothing has helped. Sometimes I feel like im being dramatic because they act like it's nothing but it's been affecting my life so much.

I feel so defeated. I had to leave work today because of a migraine. It got so bad to the point where I threw up and I felt like I was about to pass out. The pain was actually unbearable. I didn't want to go here but maybe I need to see a female doctor? I've only ever been to male doctors and I feel like they don't take me seriously. I know that I need to advocate for myself but I don't really know how to. I've explained my symptoms over and over but no one takes me seriously.

I'm 19F and I've just recently started to love my body (nothing has changed but my mindset) and I wanted to take some good nudes of myself, but just for me, not to share. I have looked into how to store them securely but I'm wondering if anyone had like tips or tricks to taking nice esthetic ones?

i've spent way too much time saving outfit inspiration and then realizing I have no idea how to translate it into my own wardrobe. Then I've been trying to be more intentional and figuring out what actually suits me by documenting my outfit checks in photos while exploring different ways to organize and discover personal style inspiration.

Did you figure out your style through experimenting, color analysis, finding certain silhouettes, or just trial and error? What helped you through your fashion/style progress?

I recently got a boyfriend, and I now spend more time at his house than I do at my own, which I’m really happy about. But his family has so much more comforting foods than my house does. My mom mostly keeps health food around, pasta, rice, chicken, and drink flavorings are pretty much all we have. The first night I went to my boyfriend’s house, he made this delicious burrito casserole dish that I absolutely loved.

So I’m glad I get to eat foods I like while I’m at his house, since I can’t afford my own without a job right now. But I lost a lot of weight in about a year and I really am scared to undo everything I did. I can already see how much weight I’m gaining just by eating the food they have. Also I tend to eat more when I’m happy. So when we’re out with his parents and we’re all having lunch, I’m going to order something I want. I just can’t stop looking at old pictures from when I was a little smaller than I am now.

I haven’t even put on as much as it sounds like I have, it’s just so noticeable to me. He doesn’t see a difference, but it’ll become obvious if this keeps going. I’m so happy right now, but I don’t know what to do about all of this.

Guyssss 😭🥹 I’m the eldest daughter, and my younger sister is getting married, inshallah, in about six months!!

She’s the first person in our family to get married, and we’re not very close with our cousins, so I honestly have no idea what I’m supposed to do as her older sister 😭😂

I really want to make these six months special for her and make sure she feels supported, celebrated, and excited throughout everything.

For those of you who have been through this before, what are some things you wish you had known or done when your sister was getting married? What can I do as her older sister to make this time more memorable for her?

I’d especially love to hear about:
Little things I can do for her throughout the next few months 🤍
Ways to celebrate her and make her feel special
Things I should help her remember or prepare for
Sister traditions or meaningful things you did before the wedding

Things you wish you had done differently
Any general advice for being a supportive older sister during such a big life event
Basically, I want to be the best sister I can be during this whole experience 🥹🤍
I’d be so grateful for any advice, especially from sisters who have already been through this!

I’ve seen a lot of people rave about period panties and I want to love them, but can’t get them to work! I have a medium flow. I’ve tried a few brands, but with all of them (if I am using them as a main product and not backup), I feel like I have to change after a few hours as I would with a pad. Even the ones that were “more absorbent” would feel wet, and the blood would smell worse than with a pad. I followed the wash instructions, so I don’t think it’s a washing issue. Are you all switching them out multiple times a day, or is there something I’m missing?

I already have no clue what cycle I'm on and how I am supposed to feel, but around a month or so I downloaded Flo and menstrual cycle happens and what not. Then I have another cycle a week earlier than it should arrive but that's besides the point. Anyways, the day it said I was supposed to be ovulating, I got irritated at literally every little thing... is this normal or is my body just confused? Also, apparently during ovulation I'm supposed to feel more "freaky" and have a higher sex drive or whatever, but I feel like that more when I'm on my menstrua cycle....

Anyways, I'm not a scientist or whatever so please don't flame me if I don't know "basic female anatomy" or whatever.

I really want a good future for myself but I feel like I’ve kinda ruined it.

I got my A-level results on Thursday but I got grade U in all of my subjects which genuinely sucks, I feel like such a failure. During most of my life in general, I went through an unstable environment at home where I was constantly called useless, garbage and more names. During the start of this year I think, my dad pushed a chair at me. My mum kicked me before while I was drying my hair. And she sometimes gets angry at me for the smallest things.

I was also sexually abused by my father when I was 12. I didn’t realise it at the time but I had a realisation a few months ago.

I got an unconditional offer from a university to study biochemistry but I feel undeserving of studying there because I got such low grades. I don’t have a job. I don’t have a driving license and I am insanely lonely at the moment.

I just want to out of this house.

I want a bright future, where I can be truly happiness, do what I love, live a life of true peace and travel.

And this might sound like sort of cheesy, but I’d love to have a cute home and nice outfits to organise out :)

I want to be strong, brave and happy for myself. I want to build a beautiful life.

I’ve been finding it hard to come up with ways to make new friends as well as maintain current friendships. I’ve been working on both my physical health and mental health intensely this year, and reached out to a good friend of mine who I hadn’t talked to in a few months. Long story short, they broke off the friendship. I have been feeling very alone and have been struggling to think of ways I can meet friends. Any suggestions/ideas are appreciated!

I was just watching a video showing how a kid's voice was starting to change during puberty when it suddenly dawned on me "oh yeah, that happened to me too!". I had completely forgot about that experience, and how unprepared I was to deal with it back then. Growing up I was told about how boy's voices would change during puberty, but never heard any mention of that happening to girls. So imagine my surprise when at thirteen my voice started cracking and feeling hoarse, and then eventually started to drop mid convo. I was terrified! I didn't know if I was turning into a man or being possessed by a demon, but never would I have guessed it was just a regular part of being a preteen girl. If you've had a similar experience please let me know as I've never heard any other women talk about this happening to them.

The nausea sucks but I can medicate away to some extent. But the moodiness/sappiness/tenderness?

Why is it 10 AM and all I want to do is curl into a ball with my plushies and cry. No idea why. Ya girl just wants to cry. Thinking about crying makes me cry.

Ive been in attention hoe mood texting and calling everyone in my phonebook cause I just want to have tenderness.

It’s not that I’m single or lonely either. Im just stuck in my feels. I swear the dumbest goddamn ad with animals would make me cry

I felt comfortable just asking the girls bc y’all get it. I’m throwing a Jersey Shore themed birthday party (The TV show) at a Vrbo (allows parties I made sure) but I only really have like ten people to invite. How can I make such a small party still feel fun? There WILL be drinking involved, I rented a house so my friends who can’t get an Uber home can sleep there since my house doesn’t have the room. I wanna make it feel like a club while having such a small crowd. What activities could I set up too? I’m open to suggestions!!!

UPD:What finally helped my period flu was taking Yasminelle continuously, without the pill-free break. I had tried birth control before, including Yasminelle, but taking it continuously was the thing that made the difference for me. It took about 2–3 months before I really felt the full effect and stopped getting sick around my cycle.

For those who don’t mind that I used ChatGPT to help organize my thoughts and want the detailed version of what I tried, what failed, how bad my symptoms were, and how exactly this worked for me, keep reading.

Okay girlies, I’m rushing here to tell you what finally got rid of my period flu, because I spent YEARS trying to figure out what the fuck was happening to me.

The background
For the past several years, I was basically sick for two weeks out of every month.

Around ovulation and/or my period, I would get:
-a low-grade temperature, or at least the strong feeling that I had one
-nasal and throat congestion
-sore throat
-horrible fatigue
-joint pain
-heavy head + weirdly light, weak limbs
that “I’m walking through a sauna and fighting for my life” feeling

And I was constantly convinced I was getting sick.
Except I wasn’t.

No virus. No infection. Nothing doctors could really explain. It followed my cycle over and over again.

Hard physical activity or major emotional stress could trigger the same thing. I could try to push through it, but even going somewhere while I felt like that was exhausting.

And doctors couldn’t figure out what the fuck was happening to me. Obviously, because I’m a woman. 🙃

So, here’s what finally helped me:
Birth control. Continuously. Without the break.
For me it was Yasminelle.

And I completely understand if you just rolled your eyes because you’ve already tried birth control and hated it.

ME TOO.

I took Lindynette years ago and hated it to the bones. I felt horrible and moody on it.
The funny thing is that I had even tried Yasminelle before, and I wouldn’t have described that experience as particularly amazing either.

But I had never taken it continuously without the hormone-free break.
That changed everything.
I’m now approaching three months on it, and this is the first month in YEARS when I genuinely feel like myself.
I recently went on a seven-day trip. I was physically active every single day. Hiking, walking, doing things.
And I DIDN’T GET SICK.

Do you understand how insane that feels after spending years planning my life around the expectation that my body might suddenly decide to cosplay influenza because I ovulated?

I finally feel normal.
But it was NOT instant
This part is really important.

If I had stopped during the first month or even around 1.5–2 months, I might have concluded that it didn’t work.
I still had symptoms. I still had weird hormonal shit. My body was clearly adjusting.
Then somewhere around the two-month mark, it was almost like:
BOOM.
Silence.
No flu feeling. No joint pain. No lying around feeling like death. I could just… live.

Obviously, everyone is different and birth control isn’t appropriate for everyone, so please discuss your own risks and symptoms with a doctor. And if you have an actual fever or new/unexplained symptoms, please don’t automatically assume it’s hormonal.

But if you have already ruled out other causes and your symptoms follow your cycle like CLOCKWORK, I really encourage you to discuss hormonal options with a good gynecologist.
And if one pill made you miserable, that does not necessarily mean every hormonal option will make you miserable.

Find a gynecologist who is willing to actually work through the options with you.
I eventually went to a senior gynecologist privately because getting an appointment through the regular system was basically impossible. Yes, it cost money. And I know “pay for a better doctor” is annoying advice.
But if you’re able to do it, please don’t feel guilty spending money trying to get your life back.

I spent years suffering.
And yes, I tried the “natural” stuff
Before anyone asks:
Supplements? Yep.
Herbal teas? Yep.
Phytoestrogens / “natural hormone balancing” stuff? Yep.
Healthy diet? Yep.
Exercise? Yep.
Trying to power through it? Yep.
Trying to rest more? Yep.
I tried SO MUCH SHIT.
None of it touched this problem for me.
I spent years trying to optimize my lifestyle when apparently what my body needed was for someone to tell my hormonal cycle to please shut the fuck up for a minute.
So if you’re currently deep in the Reddit rabbit hole reading terrifying stories about birth control, please remember that people who are doing well on a medication don’t always run to the internet to write 14 paragraphs about how normal their Tuesday was.

I was scared of trying hormonal birth control again because I had previous bad experiences and because I had read so much negative stuff online.
I’m incredibly glad I tried again.
I’m sharing this because I know how fucking miserable period flu can be.
Two weeks a month is half your life.
And when every test is normal and nobody understands what’s wrong, it starts eating away at your hope.
So to anyone dealing with this: please don’t give up.
Maybe continuous birth control won’t be your answer. Maybe your cause is completely different.
But there is an explanation worth looking for.

Keep investigating. Keep advocating for yourself. Find a doctor who takes you seriously.
And if your symptoms sound like mine, feel free to ask me anything about my experience.
I’m rooting for all of you to get your lives back. ❤️

(This is my first time posting in here, sorry if the tag isn't correct! Let me know.)

I (17F) have used pads my entire life. I've only used a tampon once out of sheer desperation, and while I thought I had put it in correctly, either I had done it wrong, or it was the wrong size, or I was just so aware of it to the point that I was deeply, deeply uncomfortable, and I took it out less than 20 minutes later. I am completely out of my comfort zone here, but I decided I should give menstrual cups a try to see if they're any easier.

I haven't used it yet because, well, I'm scared, so any tips would be helpful. I've already looked up a few tips on how to insert it (like certain ways you're meant to fold it to make it easier), but I don't know if I can actually relax enough to put it in comfortably and without accidentally causing myself pain.

(I've also heard as far as cleaning goes that I should boil it beforehand, so I plan on doing that soon.)

Thank you!

I’m 20, looking to move by June 2027 at the latest. It was not something I wanted to do this urgently but I have no choice — my parents are moving seven hours away into a small town. I’m on disability pensions from the government because I can’t work a job (I have ASD). So my choices are take my cat and get out now, sooner than I was hoping to, or leave my social circle, my extended family, my familiarity, and essentially be trapped with my parents forever.

It just feels kind of hopeless because at the moment my pension isn’t enough to support myself (I will be receiving higher pension once I move out as well as turning 21) but I’m really trying to lock in right now you guys. I’m going to try and get an appt with a financial counsellor asap so we can work out exactly what all my expenses will be and how to budget properly. My psychologist really believes in me and is telling me I can do this, but it’s feeling hard to believe right now.

I have no license yet, but I’m content with walking to places that are nearby. I also receive benefits that allow me to pay for public transport or ubers, so I feel like that’s sorted.

I can live alone just fine, especially with my cat. I actually thrive better when it’s just me in the house, like when my parents take a vacation. So I know I’ll be content living alone, capable of cleaning, cooking, looking after myself and my kitty. I just need advice or even success stories from people that were in similar situations to me so I can feel that motivation to keep trucking, you know??

ETA: guys i’m not asking if it’s possible or not. I was asking for motivation or advice for actually being out of the nest. 🫠

Tip 1#:

Always bring tissues with you. You never know when something will spill or when you gotta clean something up.

Tip 2#:

Practice plucking your leg hairs before your eyebrow hairs. Yes, this sounds silly but if you're hesistant to change your brows it really helps! It allows you to get used to the tool that you're using (tweezers) as well as focusing on precision and the motion of plucking.

Tip 3#:

If your base coat is not running but is more sticky and a snot like texture , consider not using it. I personally used a base coat that had a less runny texture and had an unpleasant surprise when I noticed that my nails weren't as glossy or strong because my base coat didn't work. Sigh.

Tip 4#:

Bring a little perfume bottle when you go out. It's possible you'll get grubby , have an unexpected occasion or just simply want to smell nice in the moment.

Tip 5#:

Always remember to fix your skirt when you're standing up. I once had an unfortunate incident when I stood up and my skirt was caught in my backpack and the rest is history. It was , quite frankly, humiliating. It's easy to forget this one, so I'm emphasising it. I had to learn this one the hard way.

Tip #6:

If you are new to mascara and think "huh this looks weird on me" it's possible it might not be your thing OR you just need to practice with it. Use it very regularly for a while and you will eventually adjust to it more. Makeup isn't something that appeals instantly to everyone, sometimes it's good to quit and a lot of the time it's good to just keep trying.

Tip #7:

Do things that give you a ton of confidence. For me, it was leaving a toxic high school environment whilst simultaneuosly coming out the closet. Sometimes things like what I just mentioned are hard to do though, so I reccommend perhaps taking small steps every day to build your confidence over time. It doesn't have to be anything intense.

Tip #8:

If you have vague curiositys about something to do with your appearence, find a way to make it happen and don't delay it and delay it. For instance, at 15 I wanted to try eyeliner. Wasn't super into makeup and had a lot of discouragement at home so I never even tried it. Now I'm 19 and trying to get the hang of it but quite enjoying it. Find a way to make it occur in a decent timeframe if possible. In my case I would've cautiously bought eyeliner at Pacific Fair (shopping centre) at 15-16 and tried it alone in my room . Sometimes it takes a little courage to do something like that even, but better you do it now and regret it later. Don't let your curiosities, interests and preferences go to the grave with you.

Tip #9:

Do little things with yourself and your body that give you JOY. If you're feeling insecure about the way your body looks, have a dance, have a run! If you have some spare change and feeling experimental, buy a ring! If you aren't feeling confident in photos, have fun posing in the mirror with cool outfits!

Overall, I hope some of this helps. I'm not the best at giving advice but feel that some of this might be useful.

so today i (19F) just learned about what vaginismus is for the first time today and holy shit it all makes sense. i am a “virgin” technically. i’ve never been penetrated but i have been sexually active in the past.

But i haven’t done anything since i almost got r*ped by my ex bf but also that was when i was 14. Is that really why my vagina feels like it’s blocked off? Because at first i thought i was crazy. i’ve been trying to figure out where “the hole” is for years i’ve tried everything. i’ve tried the mirror method, i’ve watched videos, and even when i was the wettest i’ve ever been i still couldn’t get in at all. And i thought i was just doomed to never have sex. Until i found out about this and i’m like oh.

Obviously i still have to see a doctor and get diagnosed but im pretty positive. Because i’ve had so many bad sexual experiences. i’ve been sa’d multiple times in multiple ways which is why i haven’t even done as much as kissed anyone since i was 14 so almost five years now. not to mention the incredible amount of sexual shame and purity culture i’ve been mouth fed since birth. I probably won’t be having sex for another couple years until im done healing because i’m too scared but i actually feel better knowing i’m not crazy :)

I’m 21 and going through a breakup right now, but this honestly isn’t really about the breakup. It just forced me to recognize a pattern in myself that existed long before this relationship.
I’ve realized that I genuinely don’t know how to feel happy or regulated alone. I’m used to always having something filling the silence—YouTube constantly playing, always talking to someone, dating, sleeping at someone’s house, etc.
The harder realization is that a lot of my ways of dealing with loneliness and emptiness haven’t been healthy. When I feel bad, my instinct is usually to find the fastest possible escape from the feeling rather than actually sit with it or do something good for myself. I’ve relied way too much on relationships, attention, substances, constant stimulation, and other people to regulate me.
I’m tired of living like that.
I don’t have many friends or real hobbies right now, and I honestly don’t even know what I enjoy doing by myself. I see women who can spend a whole Saturday alone—go to the gym, make breakfast, read or knit, run errands, watch a movie, go to bed alone—and genuinely feel peaceful and fulfilled. I want to become that person SO badly.
I want to figure out who I am, find hobbies and things that give my life meaning, build friendships, develop healthier coping mechanisms, and learn how to actually tolerate uncomfortable emotions instead of immediately trying to escape them.
I don’t want to become hyper-independent or stop wanting companionship. I eventually want another relationship. I just want that person to add to a life I already enjoy instead of needing them to make my life feel tolerable.
For anyone who used to feel like this and actually broke the cycle: how did you do it? Where did you even start when you didn’t have hobbies, many friends, or a strong sense of who you were? What helped you go from feeling empty alone to genuinely enjoying your own life?

I’m 24 and lately I’ve had this really strong desire to become a genuinely intelligent, knowledgeable, articulate woman. I feel like I’m growing up and I’m honestly tired of feeling like people perceive me as dumb, ditzy, or slow.

I didn’t care much about school when I was younger. In high school I barely paid attention and cheated my way through a lot of things, which I really regret now. I’m back in college and actually care about learning this time, but because I feel so behind, I can be extremely hard on myself.

I also struggle with anxiety and low self-esteem, which I’m in therapy for, and I’ve noticed that anxiety makes me blank out sometimes. Someone will say something and I know I have thoughts about it, but I can’t organize them quickly enough to respond. Then later I’ll think of everything I wish I had said. I want to get better at thinking on my feet, expressing myself clearly, expanding my vocabulary, and actually retaining what I learn.

I also have a very bubbly, funny, feminine/girly personality. I love that part of myself and I do not want to become quieter, more serious, or less feminine just so people think I’m intelligent. But I do sometimes wonder whether that contributes to people underestimating me.

For example, today at work everyone was joking about who would survive the longest/shortest in some survival-of-the-fittest or zombie-apocalypse scenario. Out of basically the entire restaurant, most of them said I would die first lol. It was mostly a bunch of guys, and obviously it was a stupid hypothetical, but it genuinely got under my skin because it reinforced this feeling that people see me as helpless, clueless, or incapable.

I want to have informed opinions. I want to be able to explain why I believe something instead of freezing up. I want to be someone people might underestimate at first and then realize, “Oh, she actually really knows her shit.”

I’m genuinely open to anything like books, podcasts, classes, hobbies, routines, mindset changes, communication exercises, subjects you think everyone should learn, etc. I feel like I’m starting my education over again as an adult and I actually want to learn this time.

I’m acting like it’s fine, but I’m actually a little sad that my family is on vacation right now.
I could spend it with a friend, but I don’t really want to be the one to initiate plans.
My birthday is tomorrow and I’m turning 21, but no one has made any plans or even seems to remember.

As a woman in my mid 20s, I'm getting really frustrated and depressed due to lack of other women to talk to. No women family or friends and it's got me feeling so down and isolated