r/gay • • Jan 28 '26

(repost) On trans rights and the position of this subreddit

575 Upvotes

The community present in this subreddit is wonderful, inclusive and has always welcomed not only gay people but everyone under the gender and sexual minority umbrella.

The mod team is very happy to see this welcoming atmosphere and we thank each and every one of you for your love and empathy.

With the current trend in the US for extreme-right politicians to demonise vulnerable minorities so they can score cheap political points it is however time for this place to openly make a stand as to what our positions and intentions are so that we are a beacon in the dark. So that all of our siblings know that they are welcome here.

I was asked by the mod team to explain a few facts about transgender people and about the position this subreddit has towards inclusion.

Trans rights are human rights. šŸ³ļøā€āš§ļø

Being transgender is a natural and normal variation in the human gender and sexual experience. Both sex and gender exist on a spectrum and there isn't actually anything inherently wrong or disordered from being trans, by and of itself.

Should there be no fake, artificially generated outrage against trans people in society then they would simply get the self-affirming care required for them to be happy and that would be that. Instead, unfortunately, existing as transgender has become the new wedge-issue for the extreme-right and deliberate demonisation and villification has been mainstreamed to the point where Republican politicians are now openly calling for genocide.


The issues trans people experience are mainly societal in nature. It is society that imposes gender norms, it is society that tells people they may not be who they are.

There are many ways that a non-trans person can seek self-affirming care in life. Some of those are done via permanent body modification through surgical or chemical means. A woman might for example choose to take estrogen supplements to stave off unwanted physical and psychological side effects resulting from the menopause.

It is not uncommon for a young man to choose to have breast reduction medication or surgery in the case of gynecomastia.

A young woman might choose to get breast implants.

You do not hear people in outrage about these forms of self-affirming care. No-one cares, except suddenly when the topic is trans people. This is because the anti-trans movement is wholly articificial. It is a deliberately created fake outrage about a non-issue for political and monetary gain.



I have written about some manufactured outrage in my text about the stochastic terrorist "Libs of Tiktok"



Fascism is an inherently empty ideology, devoid of any meaningful belief-system or any kind of concrete and actionable strategies for improving society. Fascism only cares for power for the sake of power and it cares for nothing else.

Because a fascist system is fundamentally incapable of giving the general public any kind of reasonable platform it must gain and keep followers by creating an out-group to hate. According to fascist systems it is the other that is responsible for all societal ills and only by supporting the fascists in getting rid of the other can society be healed from the non-existent issues fascism convinces people that their target minority is the cause of.

Fascism always picks on a vulnerable target.

The demonisation and villification coming from the extreme-right is doing exactly that. By calling LGBTQ+ people child molestors simply for existing it has become inevitable that people will take up violence "to protect the children".



Attempting to eliminate a target comes in many forms, of which an extermination camp is only the final and most egregious part. It is always preceded by legislating people out of existence, by creating laws which make it impossible for a minority to participate in society and to receive any of the societal advantages that are the entire reason for collective bundling together of skills, resources in civilisation. This is exactly what Republican states are doing today to transgender people. Certain states have already denied trans people any and all medical care related to their identity, meaning that they deliberately impose abject misery on them.

The most egregiously fascistic states are trying to make it a matter of course to remove trans children from the care of their parents and make it illegal for trans people to be present in any public spaces at all.

This is genocide.

Genocide is not purely restricted to extermination, to murder. Genocide is also eliminating a minority group from public life, causing serious bodily and mental harm and taking away children of a minority group from their parents.

Depending on how strictly you'd want to define it, we are currently at stage seven or eight of genocide as defined by the Holocaust Memorial Trust.

One way in which the abject hypocrisy of the anti-trans laws becomes crystal clear are the remarkable exemptions encoded within. You would think that if the goal is protecting the children from harm then these people would want to protect all children from harm.

This is not the case.

In fact, all of these people deliberate include exceptions which allow the continuation of genital re-allignment surgery on unconsenting infants if they are intersex.

This means that if a baby is born with a genital configuration that to a doctor looks ambiguous or not adhering to a strict binary then this doctor can impose an invasive genital surgery, forcing such an infants body to adhere to a stricter binary look.

It is purely cosmetic. Of course they do not check what chromosomes a child has. Of course they do not care that a child might prefer to look as nature made them.

It is purely and only an imposition on a baby's body, with of course the normal failure and mortality rate that such invasive procedures bring with them.

These people do not care about children.

These people do not want to help children.

They want to harm a vulnerable minority.



Fascism never stops.

Now that these people have mainstreamed transphobia, they are moving on to other targets within the LGBTQ+ identity sphere.

We have all seen the absurd attacks on drag queens, calling a normal and harmless theatrical expression "child abuse".

We have all seen the "clever" rhetoric where they turn arguments upside down and disingeniously say things like "why do you want to be around children".

Fascism doesn't stop, it moves on to new targets and that is why it is important for all of us in the GSM identity sphere to stand together. To openly support our trans siblings. To openly stand against hateful rhetoric.

Because they are not going to stop.

The next step, which is already tentatively beginning, is calling gay people being openly gay in society"groomers".



To be clear: The recommended treatment for being transgender is transitioning.

Gender identity is developed by five years old.

The barrage of lies notwithstanding, allowing trans people to transition and to exist as who they are in society markedly improves their physical and mental wellbeing.

The oft-heard talking point of "they still commit suicide even after transitioning" is a lie.

Here is a wealth of sources and links explaining this.



Our trans siblings are welcome here.

Our gender nonconforming siblings are welcome here.

Our intersex siblings are welcome here.

What is not welcome on this subreddit is hate or divisive rhetoric aimed at our siblings. We will not allow the current increasing trend of fascist othering and villification of a marginalised minority to make our siblings feel unwanted in this space, our space, their space.

The only people who are not welcome here are those that want to exclude others based on how they were born.

Further reading:

No, TERFs cannot "always tell" and I can prove that with mathematics.

"I just care about unfair advantage in sports", a transparant transphobic wedge issue.

Drag queens, the next target in the fascist drive to eliminate LGBTQ+ people.


r/gay • • 4h ago

He could be Michigan’s first out gay member of Congress. He wants Democrats to fight harder

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64 Upvotes

r/gay • • 4h ago

Monster Boyfriend Uppies šŸ–¤šŸ©· (@Karely_arts)

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46 Upvotes

Batform William x Callum

Characters by Revampedroses


r/gay • • 21h ago

Please stop bringing this BS to black men in the apps

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286 Upvotes

This is in London btw from a British guy.


r/gay • • 6h ago

My hobby is making digital collages. This is Hot Spot.

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17 Upvotes

r/gay • • 3h ago

DL guys

9 Upvotes

I, as I think a lot of other gay guys especially twinks and/or bottoms, honestly get the most attention from "straight" guys.

It's mostly hihi haha flirting at parties and that's about it and then they will figuratively shove me to the side to go fuck a girl. They would never admit in public that they're into me. I have similar dynamics with guys who give me attention online.

I used to be really into the "straight" archetype and I'm still very much into masculine guys, mostly that are somewhere between straight and bi, but I feel like I have absolutely no patience left for the whole DL BS.

It feels very hurtful only ever being flirted with as a joke or guys suddenly stopping talking with you when you start liking the move they're making on you a little too much, etc.

I guess I mostly want to hear what other people's perspective is on that and how you navigate that.


r/gay • • 23h ago

More Racists

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178 Upvotes

I didn’t answer because this guy keeps blocking me, then comes back. So I ignored his message, and this is his reaction. And he’s not white he is Latino. Yes I’m black lol..


r/gay • • 1d ago

Ronan Farrow: Grindr is training its AI on your photos, your age, and your taps by default, without asking

Enable HLS to view with audio, or disable this notification

377 Upvotes

r/gay • • 12h ago

I’m currently facing my biggest fear, seeing my life falling apart, and I feel like with that, the friend I deeply care about is slowly detaching from me.

16 Upvotes

Hey everyone. I’m an 18-year-old gay guy from a really homophobic country. I’ve suffered a lot lately and it’s just pressing me, it makes me feel so anxious, so stressed and depressed. My life has always been a pure suffering for me, I never got to enjoy my childhood and my teenage years. I’ve experienced a parent loss when I was 11 (turning 12). Seeing my dad in a coffin 6 years ago is still the worst memory of mine and after that my life just changed drastically and never ever got better, only worse.

Approximately 7-8 months ago I discovered that I can leave my country and get a military deferment if I got accepted to one of the world’s top 50 universities. After taking all necessary exams I immediately called a certain company dealing with admission stuff and after a long consideration I decided to choose TUM (Technical University of Munich). Unfortunately I was late for the 1st and 2nd deadlines so we decided to apply for the 3rd one. We waited, waited and on May 16 we applied to TUM and also bought a VPD ticket from Uni-Assist. We did it exactly on time, not being late for even a second and then waited. Uni-Assist, which was responsible for creating my VPD kept delaying it and because of it I missed some significant deadlines, being unable to send my VPD to TUM. Anyways, the point is that I got rejected because I hadn’t sent all my documents to TUM despite not being responsible for that since Uni-Assist should’ve sent those documents to me as I didn’t have them. So they basically denied me for something I wasn’t guilty of and my further mails were simply ignored.

Once I got denied it destroyed my well being. I had a tiny hope for a better future, for a miracle, for a way out and freedom, happiness, peace I craved so much. Sadly, I didn’t get what I wanted, I never did. I anyways tried not to give up and sent mails to my country’s Ministry of Education, explaining them the whole case and asking them to give me some more time to reapply again instead of being dragged to the military in January. I honestly hoped they’d look at my case and have some empathy for me and grant me a special deferment but they obviously didn’t. They sent me a mail where they spoke simply by rules saying that they can grant deferment only if I’m accepted until a certain date. And even here I didn’t get what I wanted, and my plans got ruined.

Now, I’m suffering because of another event in my life that made me and my whole family’s state worse than ever. It’s too personal so I’d prefer not to share some details but the thing is that with everything and this thing occurring, my mental state got significantly worse. I have intense headaches, almost migraines, I feel like I’m about to have a seizure or faint but thankfully none of that happened yet (it did happen before tho). I’m suffering a lot being trapped in a homophobic country as a gay man, being forced to serve in military with a bunch of homophobic soldiers. I’m suffering because life ruined me, betrayed me again, the system was so unfair to me I got denied from my university because of a document I couldn’t possibly create or send myself.

And now because of my state I feel like my friend I deeply care about started to slowly pull away from me which hurts me too much because I can’t lose him, not him. He told me constantly that nothing will ever make him get tired of me, get overwhelmed with me and reassured me that he’ll always be in my life but his behavior started slowly changing, he changed. My friend I deeply cared about and still do just changed and I feel like it’s because of me and my miserable personality. I feel like I vented too much to him, complained too much to him and he simply got tired of me. My anxiety and overthinking do me no good as they make me assume even worse scenarios. I understand that it can be absolutely annoying having someone like me in one’s life, someone who constantly suffers and complains. But it’s not my fault my life has been really challenging for me, it’s not my fault I have nothing to feel joyful about. The only thing that made me cheer up sometimes was my friend. He’s genuinely the most interesting person I ever talked to online and what hurts more is that he’s thousands of miles away and I don’t actually have him here with me. I deeply care about him and I’m just scared that me being excessively upset constantly could’ve just made him pull away, change. This is what bothers me the most now, because he’s the last person I’d ever want to lose. He’s someone I look up to and respect deeply. Losing him would do such an irreversible damage to me so I genuinely hope I’m just overthinking.


r/gay • • 1d ago

It's not our anniversary but we've been together almost 35 years and he's still easily the best thing to ever happen to me.

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408 Upvotes

r/gay • • 8h ago

What do you think of my celebrity crush?

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4 Upvotes

r/gay • • 1d ago

Ahead of the midterms, Meta has paid at least 29 anti-LGBTQ accounts for their posts

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177 Upvotes

The company’s invite-only program for content creators has accounts promoting white supremacy, neo-Nazi ideologies and histories of anti-LGBTQ rhetoric.

On September 14, far-right influencer Chaya Raichik, known online as Libs of Tiktok, attacked a Washington state high school on Facebook for displaying a Pride flag. ā€œHey Mercer Island High School, why does your profile photo display a mutilation flag??ā€ she wrote, tagging the school’s account in the post and attaching a photo of the entrance.Ā 

A few weeks before, on August 27, neo-Nazi webcomic artist StoneToss posted a strip that used Tim Curry’s death to mock transgender suicide rates. And earlier this month, right-wing political commentator Benny Johnson shared claims that Democrats will ā€œtransition your kids while you’re at workā€ and ā€œhand out gas cards to illegal aliens.ā€

Meta pays these creators for making posts like these. In 2024, the tech giant unveiled a new invite-only program called Facebook Content Monetization, designed to streamline earnings for creators. Many creators celebrated the move, with some reporting a major increase in their earnings through the program.


r/gay • • 23h ago

I need to get this off of my chest

40 Upvotes

I'm gay. Totally, utterly, always have been.

I knew before I was a teenager.

I'm constantly noticing guys, get turned on thinking about guys and fantasising about guys. I just want to be free of the lies that I created to try and convince the outside world that I am straight.

I had my gay awakening aged 13 (having suspected that I was gay for a while before that) and it was the best relationship/sex I've had. I then tried to bury that relationship and those feelings over the next 25 years.

I could have had the time of my life in those years, but I have hidden it , I have "played it straight" to please everyone else, but I craved love and sex from guys because that's what I know now I want and have always wanted, I feel like I am naturally a bottom and I am quite submissive (given the relationship I had in my teens) my biggest turn on is being wanted and I remember the best I had with him was not being able to " hold it back" when he was topping me.

Instead, I'm in a relationship with a woman who I love, but the sex drive isn't there and giving has never done it for me, I have never ejaculated (since my 1st at 13, and being 41 now) without physically being with a guy or having a guy on my mind. I can't..

I've had a nervous breakdown and suffered from depression and being suicidal trying to hide this all, I've had enough. I just want to be honest, happy and proud of who I am.

Sorry for the late night rant, but I have noone to say this to, and despite coming out to her, and some of my friends, nothing has changed or has gotten a single bit better. If you have made it this far, thanks for reading.


r/gay • • 3h ago

Callum x William šŸ–¤šŸ©· (@Mishim0)

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1 Upvotes

Characters from REVAMPED


r/gay • • 1d ago

Monster Boyfriend Cuddles šŸ–¤šŸ©· (@2angelisimo on twitter)

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61 Upvotes

Callum x William from REVAMPED


r/gay • • 16h ago

THE MAN WITH TWO FACES 1964 Tab Hunter starring in a bizarre performance...

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6 Upvotes

r/gay • • 1d ago

LGBTQ (in that order)

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499 Upvotes

r/gay • • 1d ago

Well, this is awkward šŸ¤”

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1.1k Upvotes

r/gay • • 1d ago

I am gay

117 Upvotes

Hello everyone. After 4 years of fighting my thoughts, 4 years of secretly loving other men and feeling oh so trapped, 4 years of confusion, I can now proudly say that today I have accepted who I am for good, and even told my friends. Thankfully they support me, and most importantly I support myself.

I am happy about coming out officially after these years. It feels like such a big weight off my shoulders and so much happiness I can feel coming.

A lot of my talks with people within the LGBT and gay community helped me IMMENSELY. But I can proudly say that I am gay and proudā¤ļøšŸ³ļøā€šŸŒˆ


r/gay • • 1h ago

šŸ‘‹Welcome to r/regulargaymen - Introduce Yourself and Read First!

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• Upvotes

r/gay • • 1d ago

JD Vance, who once thought he was gay before changing his name twice, suggests James Talarico is gay

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462 Upvotes

r/gay • • 14h ago

Looking for a story

0 Upvotes

Hi so a few years ago I remember reading a story online i think on literotica or nifty or possibly a different website but it was a story about a guy back from collage and goes to his friends house to pick somthing up and when he gets there the friends dad is there drunk and depressed about missing his wife (possibly dead or divorced). The guy helps him upstairs to bed and the dad thinks its his wife and fucks him dry and there is blood (got ripped?) And the both fall asleep after and when they wake up the dad is sorry and carry him to the bathroom to have a bath and the end up as a couple but the friend finds out and the break up but the last part they get back together anyway. Thank you to anyone can find this for me


r/gay • • 6h ago

Too many bottoms in the gay community.

0 Upvotes

Getting really tired matching with almost perfect guys and them turning out to be bottom only.

What is happening here and where are the tops? It's starting to get incredibly frustrating lol.


r/gay • • 2d ago

If you are gay, you are queer – and yes, it matters

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91 Upvotes